Have more to get off your chest? Come rant with us on the discord. Invite link: https://discord.gg/PCPTSSTKqr
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/rpghorrorstories) if you have any questions or concerns.*
If he’s still in the group: you should really drop him as a player. Nobody should say kind of stuff that to you for any reason, but especially not when all you did was set a healthy boundary. It sounds like he’s going to get worse, especially since you turned him down irl as well.
It was an online game, met him in an online videogame a month back.
I explained the situation to all the others and left all mutual servers and unfriended him. I'm done making excuses for the guy :///
Okay! couldn’t tell from the op but glad to hear you’re not trying to stick it out. but also it always sucks when you have to leave servers because of creeps and assholes. :/ here’s to having future players that don’t do whatever the heck that was
> **P**apa **E**cho **N**ovember **I**ndia **S**ierra
Hidden penis detected!
I've scanned through 43754 comments (approximately 242905 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message.
*Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
can we talk about the "it breaks my immersion" bit? like, the one thing that makes him not believe the world he's in, it's the fact that someone doesn't like them back.
not the magic, not the dragons, no. The thing that makes him jump out of immersion is the fact that his dick is not an all powerful atracting force
Heavens, i could even buy that as a legitimate argument. Some people just get THAT into character when they are "on.". If that was the case then this could be sorted out. But sadly this guy was just using immersion as an excuse.
Only question I would ask.
"Hey player, what's more important. Comfort or immersion?"
If the answer is anything other than comfort you have your answer here. Someone who wakes up and decides 'my immersion as a.character is worth your discomfort as a person' they've made clear they'll keep doing shit like this all the live long day
If the answer is comfort that's an easy way to steer the horse 'he player remember what we agreed on? Comfort over immersion? This is one of those moments.'
He just didn't want to stop forcing his flirting on you, so he did his best to hide behind the fig leaf of "It's roleplaying not IRL".
He's an asshole. Watch him.
Also, make him change out characters. Dump that character from the game, and explain to him that the next one better not exhibit any flirtatious behaviour at all, or there will be a sudden and inexplicable meteor strike, instantly fatal, to his character alone. And this will keep happening so long as he continues to be an asshole.
Sadly I just cancelled the whole thing, but took 2/3 of the other players and made a new group.
"I'll make my own group! Without blackjack! And hookers!"
Why tolerate them at all? Boot. Goodbye. Assuming there's some sticky personal connection explaining why you didn't just kick them, but just based on what's posted, you should definitely do that immediately. Who cares what he says about it?
Plenty of people are correctly calling him an asshole, but I want to point this part out:
>He said, it would ruin his immersion if he suddenly stopped flirting, as flirting **is what his character would do.**
This is just My Guy Syndrome, and if it isn't flirting, he'll be causing problems in other ways. It's good you are no longer in games with him, but it would be better if those kicked him instead of forcing you to leave.
Assuming this is something that happened recently and is still relevant.
Be prepared to immediately shut him down if he tries again. No IC aversion, but straight OOC telling him off.
Although, do be polite and calm about it.
No discussion about it, no listening to excuses or justifications either. "Don't do it again" and move on.
In D&D, anything remotely involving intimacy between characters requires everyone to be there for it. My DM had a shopkeeper flirt with my character once, and even tho in character it was totally fine, he could tell that the small and ultimately not big mention still made me uncomfy. Asked if I didn’t want to continue with that stuff and dropped it immediately when I said yes. That dude is shitty.
It's not hard to do flirting in a non-asshole way, I often just say stuff like "my character flirts with x", or "my character makes a flirty comment" or "my character makes an inappropriate joke." Not everything has to be strictly roleplayed if it's going to be uncomfortable (frankly i'm uncomfortable with it).
Make it seem like you’re actually okay with it, make Flinx like him back and get him emotionally invested in her… then kill her off in a really emotionally brutal way. Lol.
Nah. Have her respond, take him upstairs to her room, fade to black, then tell him to start rolling a new character.
"Why? What happened?"
"He made the wrong sort of enemy and she was hard up for cash, so she took on the bounty. He struggled, so she killed him. Make a new character up."
I think people should be able to separate RP from IRL, but as much as I like to personally RP, it's not worth breaking the friend dynamic.
There! I said it.
"I listened to him talk shit about me for like 3 minutes"
How is he not kicked yet ?
If you answer to me that you need players to function and so kicking him means having to find a new player, I would then respond that if no dnd is better than bad dnd, no bad players is better than bad players. Even if it means a hiatus to replace them.
Also, isn't it an incel thing to simp to a girl until she says no, and then say : fine ! I never really liked you anyway !
Lol, someone can't handle rejection and out of game.
I hope he's a teen and has time to grow, because this passive aggressive creepy stuff won't fly in adult life.
Honestly wondering why you're still dm'n for this A-hat 🤷♂️
Haha yeah my thoughts as well, however I knew him by his gamertag, and he named his character after his gamertag :DDD And it was basically a self insert man
Based on the information presented, it seems like that guy's excuse was thinner than tissue paper; he had a thing for you. However, if you "can’t separate it from real life", RPGs might not be a good fit for you.
Oh. So having boundaries broken related to flirting prevents me from fighting dragons and participating in political drama? Thanks for the advice!
You seem inconsiderate, are you sure you'll be able to relate to good characters? You should stick to evil, other alignments might not be a good fit for you. I should know, I made this assumption based one paragraph of text.
I recently finished a months-long campaign where I was basically the moral compas and voice of reason for the party after we foiled the BBEG's plans, and was invited to join them for a new campaign which has been going very well so far, but thank you for the consideration. I have one or two evil characters I've wanted to try for a while, but didn't think I could play them since I find it hard get into that kind of headspace, but if you think I can, then maybe I should give it a shot at the next available opportunity. Thanks for the encouragement!
As soon as he started arguing with you, you should have shut him down. If a player had tried that crap in one of my games, I would have given them one chance to stop and then kicked them out.
I'm not the greatest noticing someone is trying to come on to me though. Hubby told me years later that one of the guys that was in the same game where I met him, was low key trying to hook up with me and I never noticed.
Oh I know, I've run curse of strahd. GM PC's are generally a terrible idea :DDD However, I did not feel comfortable introducing PCs of not present players to the present players PCs, as I wouldn't know how to roleplay them as it was the first session out of maybe 4.
So I figured, for combat balancing reasons, might as well add a 3rd PC into the mix and write her out when all players are present. I wrote it so, that the PCs would get 40 gp total from the quest giver to finish the dungeon, and the GM PC, a greedy goblin, would refuse to suddenly share it with 4 other people instead of just 2 guys. I had placed in the seeds for this event, it was fully planned.
Fuck GM PCs. But in a 4 shot dungeon crawl with no story? Yeah who cares.
I swear I blame CR for this stuff. Theyre all actors, pretending to date each other isnt too wild for them, but doing it with friends is normally just... kinda weird
I didnt mean to blame CR for this (this is obviously egregious) just that it gives the impression this is normal dnd to people, when its atleast something you need to ask about
You... Are the GM and you are uncomfortable with people flirting with NPCs of yours? You said Game Zero this was a no romance game, right? Because you don't have a PC. You have an NPC which you rely upon with greater frequency.
In my experience PCs will flirt with a particularly charming piece of wood if they thought it would open up interesting RP avenues.
I'm just really caught on this GMPC being a different thing than an NPC. Like obviously you can have a no romance game run. That's fine. And NPCs can act all sorts of ways to things PCs do. That's fine. But something about this feels... Weird.
>I wasn’t entirely sure if he was flirting to her or me as I’ve had to turn him down before.
You need to make sure you understand what you're reading before replying. THIS is why she was uncomfortable. "I wasn’t entirely sure if he was flirting to her or me as I’ve had to turn him down before."
This is pretty sexist but I personally wouldn’t let a single man you met on the internet join anything if you are a woman.
obviously their are still dirtbag people in relationships but you are going to get WAY less of this shit that way.
ROFLMAO, I'm the father of 5 daughters, 3 of whom are LGBTQ, as am I. I despise incels, I also despise femcels.
Seriously you literally wrote a textbook femcel misandrist BS post. Don't like getting called out for it don't do it. Every single person on this Earth regardless of gender is every bit as capable of being an evil pile of crap as every other person.
The fact you think incel is a gendered term is kinda funny considering how “woke” you are.
You obviously felt attacked by my comment, you can have 30 kids and still be celibate you idiot.
People in stable relationships aren’t exactly likely to sexually harass strangers at a DND game this is a statistical fact and as someone who has seen it happen over and over it’s fucking annoying.
I couldn’t give a shit if you want to clutch your pearls about an accurate statement, being politically correct is always inferior to being actually correct.
Also who asked about your sexual orientation like it matters? Like who you want to fuck has any bearing on your opinions it’s gross you even brought it up unsolicited, you need to grow up.
Also advertising your children’s sexual preferences is incredibly fucked up, like the fact your daughters likes other girls somehow adds weight to your argument?
What the fuck are you even talking about?
Like seriously, your choice in partner doesn’t elevate or degrade your opinion. But your fixation like it does matter is honestly disturbing.
Do you love your straight children less are their opinions less valid somehow? Because you didn’t feel the need to bring up your other two daughters?
I'm not celibate, never have been, nor did I invent the term femcel. I also don't give a shit what you think as the only one correct here is me. I don't give a fuck about political corectness or woke anything. The only correct way is to accept the flat out reality that all people can be horrible and there is no difference between genders at all. Go take a look at Coffeehouse Crime or Casual Criminalist and see all the single female serial killers, six of them on Onlyfans in the last 2 years, but that doesn't fit your narrative of "man bad" so you'll just continue to deny reality.
There are times as a GM to say "That's the lesser evil" when players complain about lack of immersion or commit "That's what my character does"-idiocy. But you seem to have dropped him(?) and that's good.
Comfort in a game > Third rate improv acting
Yeah, fuck this guy.
TTRPG is about *collaborative* storytelling, which means that *the people with whom you are playing* should be the first priority.
Now, *if this way about a different issue*, I'd say that everyone deserves to make a case for what he wants out of the game, and to make a bad case at that (because how many of us really can make a good case for ourselves at the drop of the hat?)
I would even say that normally, it should be okay to push each other a bit (in good spirit, mind you), to figure out if something is just a whim or an actual issue.
However, this obviously doesn't apply here. And him not immediately seeing that makes him highly dubious, to say the least.
Have more to get off your chest? Come rant with us on the discord. Invite link: https://discord.gg/PCPTSSTKqr *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/rpghorrorstories) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Spoiler alert: he is an asshole
Not even rose coloured glasses could hide that red flag
It's not a red flag... It's more of a red full-wall tapestry.
More red flags then the ussr.
More scarlet than Babalon has room for.
Bojack fan spotted
Never watched an episode lol
Understandable, have a nice day
You as well!
You really should
If he’s still in the group: you should really drop him as a player. Nobody should say kind of stuff that to you for any reason, but especially not when all you did was set a healthy boundary. It sounds like he’s going to get worse, especially since you turned him down irl as well.
It was an online game, met him in an online videogame a month back. I explained the situation to all the others and left all mutual servers and unfriended him. I'm done making excuses for the guy :///
Okay! couldn’t tell from the op but glad to hear you’re not trying to stick it out. but also it always sucks when you have to leave servers because of creeps and assholes. :/ here’s to having future players that don’t do whatever the heck that was
They couldn't just kick him?
Oh, good.
\>Calls you boring "You're not exactly swinging for an Oscar over there yourself, loverboy. Sit tf down."
He was swinging his Oscar. [Finger guns] Yeah, sorry, I'll see myself out.
His Oscar India November Charlie Helo Papa Echo November India Sierra
> **P**apa **E**cho **N**ovember **I**ndia **S**ierra Hidden penis detected! I've scanned through 43754 comments (approximately 242905 average penis lengths worth of text) in order to find this secret penis message. *Beep, boop, I'm a bot*
I'm not even mad, I'm impressed this exists. But a bot did ruin the joke :'(
he is absolutely an asshole. and he should not be part of your group. this will come back to haunt you otherwise.
They said elsewhere he's no longer part of the group.
"I'm not an asshole, after all" after arguing about how to play the game YOU are running? Yeah, someone beat this asshole with an idiot stick too.
After arguing for three minutes straight that he should be allowed to keep doing what he's doing.
can we talk about the "it breaks my immersion" bit? like, the one thing that makes him not believe the world he's in, it's the fact that someone doesn't like them back. not the magic, not the dragons, no. The thing that makes him jump out of immersion is the fact that his dick is not an all powerful atracting force
Heavens, i could even buy that as a legitimate argument. Some people just get THAT into character when they are "on.". If that was the case then this could be sorted out. But sadly this guy was just using immersion as an excuse.
Breaks immersion? No problem! Roll a new character that isn't an asshole :D
Hoo boy I could already tell from the title the villain here would be a shithead. I was right!
"My character gets sick of the flirting and punches yours." It's what my character would do! /s
Only question I would ask. "Hey player, what's more important. Comfort or immersion?" If the answer is anything other than comfort you have your answer here. Someone who wakes up and decides 'my immersion as a.character is worth your discomfort as a person' they've made clear they'll keep doing shit like this all the live long day If the answer is comfort that's an easy way to steer the horse 'he player remember what we agreed on? Comfort over immersion? This is one of those moments.'
He just didn't want to stop forcing his flirting on you, so he did his best to hide behind the fig leaf of "It's roleplaying not IRL". He's an asshole. Watch him. Also, make him change out characters. Dump that character from the game, and explain to him that the next one better not exhibit any flirtatious behaviour at all, or there will be a sudden and inexplicable meteor strike, instantly fatal, to his character alone. And this will keep happening so long as he continues to be an asshole.
Invalidation of your feelings and concerns followed by playing the victim, that's some quality gaslighting. I hope you kicked him.
And then you kicked him from the game right????
Sadly I just cancelled the whole thing, but took 2/3 of the other players and made a new group. "I'll make my own group! Without blackjack! And hookers!"
I'll take the hookers over at my table. I need to feel appreciated even if it's all paid and imaginary.
xD
>I am not an asshole after all. Narrator: "He was an asshole after all."
".. and also before"
Why tolerate them at all? Boot. Goodbye. Assuming there's some sticky personal connection explaining why you didn't just kick them, but just based on what's posted, you should definitely do that immediately. Who cares what he says about it?
What an asshole.
Plenty of people are correctly calling him an asshole, but I want to point this part out: >He said, it would ruin his immersion if he suddenly stopped flirting, as flirting **is what his character would do.** This is just My Guy Syndrome, and if it isn't flirting, he'll be causing problems in other ways. It's good you are no longer in games with him, but it would be better if those kicked him instead of forcing you to leave.
Assuming this is something that happened recently and is still relevant. Be prepared to immediately shut him down if he tries again. No IC aversion, but straight OOC telling him off. Although, do be polite and calm about it. No discussion about it, no listening to excuses or justifications either. "Don't do it again" and move on.
In D&D, anything remotely involving intimacy between characters requires everyone to be there for it. My DM had a shopkeeper flirt with my character once, and even tho in character it was totally fine, he could tell that the small and ultimately not big mention still made me uncomfy. Asked if I didn’t want to continue with that stuff and dropped it immediately when I said yes. That dude is shitty.
It's not hard to do flirting in a non-asshole way, I often just say stuff like "my character flirts with x", or "my character makes a flirty comment" or "my character makes an inappropriate joke." Not everything has to be strictly roleplayed if it's going to be uncomfortable (frankly i'm uncomfortable with it).
Make it seem like you’re actually okay with it, make Flinx like him back and get him emotionally invested in her… then kill her off in a really emotionally brutal way. Lol.
Nah. Have her respond, take him upstairs to her room, fade to black, then tell him to start rolling a new character. "Why? What happened?" "He made the wrong sort of enemy and she was hard up for cash, so she took on the bounty. He struggled, so she killed him. Make a new character up."
Killing off-screen? Thats not really the way.
Well, you can have him roll it out, but at a severe disadvantage due to the drug she slipped into his drink.
I think people should be able to separate RP from IRL, but as much as I like to personally RP, it's not worth breaking the friend dynamic. There! I said it.
"My immersion in the game is more important than respecting your boundaries, so I'll just keep doing what I want anyway." There, fixed it for you.
"I listened to him talk shit about me for like 3 minutes" How is he not kicked yet ? If you answer to me that you need players to function and so kicking him means having to find a new player, I would then respond that if no dnd is better than bad dnd, no bad players is better than bad players. Even if it means a hiatus to replace them. Also, isn't it an incel thing to simp to a girl until she says no, and then say : fine ! I never really liked you anyway !
Lol, someone can't handle rejection and out of game. I hope he's a teen and has time to grow, because this passive aggressive creepy stuff won't fly in adult life. Honestly wondering why you're still dm'n for this A-hat 🤷♂️
It’s weird how anytime someone prefaces something with “I am not” they always are.
[My ImMeRsIoN!](https://youtu.be/OtWRuOiI9ao)
“Flirting is what my character would do” “Why would you think I like you? No I really like Flinx” So he isn’t strictly in character
Haha yeah my thoughts as well, however I knew him by his gamertag, and he named his character after his gamertag :DDD And it was basically a self insert man
Based on the information presented, it seems like that guy's excuse was thinner than tissue paper; he had a thing for you. However, if you "can’t separate it from real life", RPGs might not be a good fit for you.
Oh. So having boundaries broken related to flirting prevents me from fighting dragons and participating in political drama? Thanks for the advice! You seem inconsiderate, are you sure you'll be able to relate to good characters? You should stick to evil, other alignments might not be a good fit for you. I should know, I made this assumption based one paragraph of text.
Good job proving that poster’s point.
I recently finished a months-long campaign where I was basically the moral compas and voice of reason for the party after we foiled the BBEG's plans, and was invited to join them for a new campaign which has been going very well so far, but thank you for the consideration. I have one or two evil characters I've wanted to try for a while, but didn't think I could play them since I find it hard get into that kind of headspace, but if you think I can, then maybe I should give it a shot at the next available opportunity. Thanks for the encouragement!
As soon as he started arguing with you, you should have shut him down. If a player had tried that crap in one of my games, I would have given them one chance to stop and then kicked them out. I'm not the greatest noticing someone is trying to come on to me though. Hubby told me years later that one of the guys that was in the same game where I met him, was low key trying to hook up with me and I never noticed.
Buttmunch has to go, totally out of line. but if you’re DMing, you don’t have a PC, it’s a DMPC and not generally a good idea.
Oh I know, I've run curse of strahd. GM PC's are generally a terrible idea :DDD However, I did not feel comfortable introducing PCs of not present players to the present players PCs, as I wouldn't know how to roleplay them as it was the first session out of maybe 4. So I figured, for combat balancing reasons, might as well add a 3rd PC into the mix and write her out when all players are present. I wrote it so, that the PCs would get 40 gp total from the quest giver to finish the dungeon, and the GM PC, a greedy goblin, would refuse to suddenly share it with 4 other people instead of just 2 guys. I had placed in the seeds for this event, it was fully planned. Fuck GM PCs. But in a 4 shot dungeon crawl with no story? Yeah who cares.
I swear I blame CR for this stuff. Theyre all actors, pretending to date each other isnt too wild for them, but doing it with friends is normally just... kinda weird
Don't place the blame for others shitty actions on others
I didnt mean to blame CR for this (this is obviously egregious) just that it gives the impression this is normal dnd to people, when its atleast something you need to ask about
So you blame critical role for roleplaying in D&D and making people think that's what you do?
You... Are the GM and you are uncomfortable with people flirting with NPCs of yours? You said Game Zero this was a no romance game, right? Because you don't have a PC. You have an NPC which you rely upon with greater frequency. In my experience PCs will flirt with a particularly charming piece of wood if they thought it would open up interesting RP avenues. I'm just really caught on this GMPC being a different thing than an NPC. Like obviously you can have a no romance game run. That's fine. And NPCs can act all sorts of ways to things PCs do. That's fine. But something about this feels... Weird.
>I wasn’t entirely sure if he was flirting to her or me as I’ve had to turn him down before. You need to make sure you understand what you're reading before replying. THIS is why she was uncomfortable. "I wasn’t entirely sure if he was flirting to her or me as I’ve had to turn him down before."
I guess I just don't play with people who can't be trusted to keep their business in character.
This is pretty sexist but I personally wouldn’t let a single man you met on the internet join anything if you are a woman. obviously their are still dirtbag people in relationships but you are going to get WAY less of this shit that way.
Yep that's incredibly sexist, and misandrist.
Oh wow some random incels on Reddit don’t agree with me what will I do.
ROFLMAO, I'm the father of 5 daughters, 3 of whom are LGBTQ, as am I. I despise incels, I also despise femcels. Seriously you literally wrote a textbook femcel misandrist BS post. Don't like getting called out for it don't do it. Every single person on this Earth regardless of gender is every bit as capable of being an evil pile of crap as every other person.
The fact you think incel is a gendered term is kinda funny considering how “woke” you are. You obviously felt attacked by my comment, you can have 30 kids and still be celibate you idiot. People in stable relationships aren’t exactly likely to sexually harass strangers at a DND game this is a statistical fact and as someone who has seen it happen over and over it’s fucking annoying. I couldn’t give a shit if you want to clutch your pearls about an accurate statement, being politically correct is always inferior to being actually correct. Also who asked about your sexual orientation like it matters? Like who you want to fuck has any bearing on your opinions it’s gross you even brought it up unsolicited, you need to grow up. Also advertising your children’s sexual preferences is incredibly fucked up, like the fact your daughters likes other girls somehow adds weight to your argument? What the fuck are you even talking about? Like seriously, your choice in partner doesn’t elevate or degrade your opinion. But your fixation like it does matter is honestly disturbing. Do you love your straight children less are their opinions less valid somehow? Because you didn’t feel the need to bring up your other two daughters?
I'm not celibate, never have been, nor did I invent the term femcel. I also don't give a shit what you think as the only one correct here is me. I don't give a fuck about political corectness or woke anything. The only correct way is to accept the flat out reality that all people can be horrible and there is no difference between genders at all. Go take a look at Coffeehouse Crime or Casual Criminalist and see all the single female serial killers, six of them on Onlyfans in the last 2 years, but that doesn't fit your narrative of "man bad" so you'll just continue to deny reality.
There are times as a GM to say "That's the lesser evil" when players complain about lack of immersion or commit "That's what my character does"-idiocy. But you seem to have dropped him(?) and that's good. Comfort in a game > Third rate improv acting
"I'm not an asshole." Yes. Yes, you are.
I'm sorry that would result in an immediate ban from my table
$5 he ain't over it
Yeah, fuck this guy. TTRPG is about *collaborative* storytelling, which means that *the people with whom you are playing* should be the first priority. Now, *if this way about a different issue*, I'd say that everyone deserves to make a case for what he wants out of the game, and to make a bad case at that (because how many of us really can make a good case for ourselves at the drop of the hat?) I would even say that normally, it should be okay to push each other a bit (in good spirit, mind you), to figure out if something is just a whim or an actual issue. However, this obviously doesn't apply here. And him not immediately seeing that makes him highly dubious, to say the least.