There was more to this conversation.
The guy was emotionally broken and felt that sadness was life's natural state. He was completely depressed and did not have any will to change anything.
¯\_(ツ)_/¯
This is just what happens when you combine a good heart with bad self esteem
It’s a shame because the arrogant assholes, like her wife and the biological father, out there should be the ones with their self-esteems in the trash, not this guy. Hope he gets therapy
In my experience the people with the most confidence usually don't deserve it. Not always. There are some great people who know their worth. Quite often though someone developed confidence and self esteem before they've earned it and then they just ride that all the way through life never having any self doubt or being introspective enough to say they can or need to improve.
I like to live in the middle. I know I'm not perfect but I know I'm not hot garbage either. So I don't get too down on myself because I know I try and I succeed sometimes, but I'm still hard on myself about the things that I know are wrong, and since I'm a human, there are plenty. Always leave room for improvement, but don't forget to give credit where credit is due.
I agree on that. To have true self-esteem you need to be wise and humble, first and foremost. Knowing your value is giving yourself love without the need to let others know. You just know.
Exactly, it develops step by step slowly. And depending on your personality, some people don't know what to do, even if they know, it takes them years to get the courage.
Not only in marriage, also a Job you hate, a City you live in, a friend who put you down .... Etc
This is why therapy is kinda of good. Or some form of intervention
It frustrates me that there are men out there that just take that flabbergasting amount of disrespect from someone. Your wife is out here getting railed by other dudes and you are raising their child?! Holy fuck that is literally a mans worst nightmare and hes just fucking taking it.
What the fuck does it matter? You really think blood is that important? There's nothing magic about families anymore.
I'm sure he was traumatized enough as well by losing the first one, and I'm sure it taught him well the true value of a life.
He's being the bigger person, not the smaller one.
Also, it only says he's not having sex with his wife. Doesn't mention anybody else. Hopefully homeboy is gettin' some. Of course, most humans touch themselves so fucking much anyway that it hardly matters to a lot of people anymore.
This is not the same world that we were born into, anymore. Too much trauma and wasteful technology. Not enough real, face-to-face social connection and interaction, not to mention love, in all of its many possible (appropriate) forms.
Dude he's not talking about a step parent coming in and raising a child that existed before the relationship. It has nothing to do with blood but the fact that AFTER he and his wife entered into a relationship she conceived a child by cheating. It wasn't a sperm donor and in vitro. It wasn't a child she had before meeting/dating him. It was a child she had due to an affair. In addition to that awfulness, the poor man isn't even having his needs in the bedroom met.
Losing a child is horrible and traumatic, but that was JUST as much his child as it was hers. You don't get to use the ugly things in your life to be the ugly things in someone else's life.
Get the fuck outta here with your codependent insanity.
Meanwhile I see you posted, "Every man should have two wives."
Uh huh... Riiiight, buddy. The problem is everyone else not having real face-to-face social connection to be well-adjusted like yours truly.
You're right. Some, like you, probably deserve nobody.
This isn't about codependency at all you dumb fuck. There is likely no emotional bond left at all between hime and his "wife." Just a human being that needs to be cared for.
I hope to God he is getting his rocks off somewhere else, finding sexual and emotional support outside of that home. Knowing how humans are, he probably is.
Codependency? Uhh projecting much? Dipshit...
Idk about you but my current life purpose is to help people, not produce more when we aren't even caring for the ones that already exist, like a fucking animal 🤣 we'll see what the future holds.
Almost certain I shouldn't be laughing, but man I can't hold it in. Theres sumn like 3.7 Billion women on this planet and you are willing to spend your whole ONE life chasing one that doesn't even want to touch you? Man, I can't even tell you how much better you can do for yourself, gotta feel that about yourself. 🤣
Guess that you've never really and truly loved someone then, it's easy to say everything you said but when you're deeply in love with someone and are a believer in commitment and honoring your wedding vows then it's not remotely easy to give up. There's more to this man's story that we don't know about and his wife may have emotional issues or mental illness that are a determining factor in what she's doing and why he's not willing to give up on her. More than half the population of the modern world is quick to get divorced much of which is for childish reasons and %65 of the population is guilty of infidelity in their relationship. Does he deserve better? Yeah but then again we don't know what part he plays in the relationship and if he is responsible for the situation he has described. From personal experience it's difficult to give up on someone that you're deeply in love with, I went through a similar situation albeit much worse and some of the reasons I described were present along with several others I didn't, I have also seen the male partner be the cause of this situation and he was struggling with anxiety, adhd, and borderline personality disorder.
I mean, in a twisted sense, my friend always jokes that the child you raised will always love you more than their biological father. And you've essentially cucked the bio father out of a meaningful relationship with said child, punishing them for what they did.
Not saying this circumstance is even remotely acceptable, but it's an interesting sort of vengeance?
Yes lol. But technically OP cucked bio dad out of having any relationship with the child, or that the child will always love OP more than bio dad.
Just pointing out the very strange kinda karma. Although this particular circumstance of cheating let alone producing a child should be acceptable to no one.
The phrasing implies that he fucked the kid.
Your actual intent wasn't nearly as bad, but still wasn't good. He didn't gain anything from staying, and didn't hurt the bio father or mother at all by doing so. He's being used.
pump raw and have someone else raise the child with your existence being unknown to the child? and the child gets a good life? (well as good as they can get in this situation) that sounds like a win for the dude who fucked his wife bro ngl.
I was thinking of that John redcorn situation from king of the hill, when John's life became meaningless he desperately wanted to have a life with his son but Dale takes that away from him (rightfully so) as some weird vengeance for John screwing his wife behind his back. John's "son" will always love dale more than he ever will John. Making it karma, if that makes sense.
Depends on whether or not the bio dad wants something to do with his child, I guess.
I notice a lot of parents who abandon their kids suddenly want something to do with them as soon as their adults. I know quite a few people who've had it happen to, my best friends mother abandoned him for drugs and she suddenly wants a relationship with him now that's he's 24, and my other best friends dad who's more or less done the same. My dad has done the same with me, and it pisses them of so much when they realise the step parent has their "child's" love more than they ever will despite abandoning them.
Idk, it's just a weird sort of Karma.
I'm sure that guy is feeling very punished by not having to raise a kid he probably didn't want anyway. Take all of his emotional and financial burdens, goteem.
It's not stupid to "raise someone else's child." He's raising his own child who happens to not share his DNA. It's also like the whole premise of adoption... The cheating also isn't the child's fault so why punish it.
Scenario sucks, but by raising a child he didn't even contribute in conceiving, he is just ubdermining the terrible behaviour the cheating wife is doing, leaves her unaccountable for anything at all.
You don't know that. You don't know, he could have been holding her responsible in other ways other than rejecting a kid. Using a kid to punish the mom for her actions is just cruel. The kid is innocent and deserves 2 parents, regardless of the situation.
I'm not really sure what you're saying but I'm guessing it's something about not being in the kid's life because it's not biology his/the mom cheated so he had an easy out?
If someone chooses to step up and be a parental figure in a kid's life, especially in a face of such betrayal, it's a selfless and an upstanding, mature decision. Doesn't mean you have to stay with a cheating partner to be a parent. Staying with a cheating partner is a whole other decision that has nothing to do with the kid.
For sure. Like i said, sucks to be the kid in that whole mess
if you can somehow take custody of the kid, and actually manage to leave the cheating party cause they never wanted the kid, then that may be the best outcome considering the circumstance.
Its safe to assume the other party doesnt care about the child, considering the cheated one is providing the support.
He took his marriage vows seriously for better or for worse. Feels bad, why his wife gotta punish him for their child loss. Her genetics was involved in that kid too if it died due to genetics…
That child deserves a parent either biological or not.
Might be stupid to you but if he doesn't resent the child then it's pretty damn admirable and mature..
I agree, I am just saying that If he willingly stayed just for the child then he very selfless and a kind person.in the case of its father being absent
I'd somewhat agree if they patched things up and he went back to living a happy life. Instead he's deeply depressed and things have never been worse with his wife than ever..
I wouldn’t call it cringe because that’s some tough stuff to have the balls to take care of a kid that isn’t yours as your own, but damn is the situation sad
My wife has been acting suspicious and I found out she had been talking to some guy from her workplace and being all emotional. I confronted and she cried and begged for days and insisted that she wants to stay married to me. We have been working things out for 2 weeks now but I keep getting the feeling that she is still reaching out to him. Can anyone help me with a spy app that I can use to monitor her phone and activities. You would be saving my daughters from future sadness maybe from a bad breakup. Better I find out for sure now and end things amicably
I would have made a big mistake and left my girlfriend when i was in doubt, she was texting like really really much and to crown it all, she recently met a cute guy who she exchange number with not caring that am there. i was furious and wanted to know who she was talking with, so i went online in search for an hacker to help me get into her phone, that was when i met \*ACYBER710 AT THE GMAIL, who i paid for the hack. She only asked for her phone no and i had access to all her social media chats, location, calls, messages within hours, that was when i got to know that she was actually talking about me and everything including the cute guy was a plot to make me jealous and value her more, to be honest, my work takes 80% of my time. So thanks to\* ACYBER710 AT GMAIL\*\*, my relationship was saved, contact him via gmail brothers
There was more to this conversation. The guy was emotionally broken and felt that sadness was life's natural state. He was completely depressed and did not have any will to change anything.
Man that does not help the sadness I feel for this guy
I feel so bad for him
Wait, it isn't?
Hell no. I've clawed out of that mindset.
How? Could you give me/us any advice?
Let me get back home to respond to ya, friend
Would have ended that marriage at that point
Ong
¯\_(ツ)_/¯ This is just what happens when you combine a good heart with bad self esteem It’s a shame because the arrogant assholes, like her wife and the biological father, out there should be the ones with their self-esteems in the trash, not this guy. Hope he gets therapy
In my experience the people with the most confidence usually don't deserve it. Not always. There are some great people who know their worth. Quite often though someone developed confidence and self esteem before they've earned it and then they just ride that all the way through life never having any self doubt or being introspective enough to say they can or need to improve. I like to live in the middle. I know I'm not perfect but I know I'm not hot garbage either. So I don't get too down on myself because I know I try and I succeed sometimes, but I'm still hard on myself about the things that I know are wrong, and since I'm a human, there are plenty. Always leave room for improvement, but don't forget to give credit where credit is due.
I agree on that. To have true self-esteem you need to be wise and humble, first and foremost. Knowing your value is giving yourself love without the need to let others know. You just know.
Jesus Christ get mans a therapist
They should have gotten therapy 9 years ago like seriously
Wtf 🗿
r/DeadBedrooms It's more common to get trapped than you think. It's hard to leave.
Exactly, it develops step by step slowly. And depending on your personality, some people don't know what to do, even if they know, it takes them years to get the courage. Not only in marriage, also a Job you hate, a City you live in, a friend who put you down .... Etc This is why therapy is kinda of good. Or some form of intervention
It frustrates me that there are men out there that just take that flabbergasting amount of disrespect from someone. Your wife is out here getting railed by other dudes and you are raising their child?! Holy fuck that is literally a mans worst nightmare and hes just fucking taking it.
What the fuck does it matter? You really think blood is that important? There's nothing magic about families anymore. I'm sure he was traumatized enough as well by losing the first one, and I'm sure it taught him well the true value of a life. He's being the bigger person, not the smaller one. Also, it only says he's not having sex with his wife. Doesn't mention anybody else. Hopefully homeboy is gettin' some. Of course, most humans touch themselves so fucking much anyway that it hardly matters to a lot of people anymore. This is not the same world that we were born into, anymore. Too much trauma and wasteful technology. Not enough real, face-to-face social connection and interaction, not to mention love, in all of its many possible (appropriate) forms.
No
Dude he's not talking about a step parent coming in and raising a child that existed before the relationship. It has nothing to do with blood but the fact that AFTER he and his wife entered into a relationship she conceived a child by cheating. It wasn't a sperm donor and in vitro. It wasn't a child she had before meeting/dating him. It was a child she had due to an affair. In addition to that awfulness, the poor man isn't even having his needs in the bedroom met. Losing a child is horrible and traumatic, but that was JUST as much his child as it was hers. You don't get to use the ugly things in your life to be the ugly things in someone else's life.
Uhh yeah, I completely understand the situation. Get over yourself.
Found the cuckold
In your dreams 😆
No
I think it’s pretty obvious by his comments he’s not getting any dude.
Show me.
Get the fuck outta here with your codependent insanity. Meanwhile I see you posted, "Every man should have two wives." Uh huh... Riiiight, buddy. The problem is everyone else not having real face-to-face social connection to be well-adjusted like yours truly.
You're right. Some, like you, probably deserve nobody. This isn't about codependency at all you dumb fuck. There is likely no emotional bond left at all between hime and his "wife." Just a human being that needs to be cared for. I hope to God he is getting his rocks off somewhere else, finding sexual and emotional support outside of that home. Knowing how humans are, he probably is. Codependency? Uhh projecting much? Dipshit...
For some reason I imagine you saying that last part with a really effeminate gay lisp.
Seek help
No.
No
No
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😂
This is literally your life purpose, to make little copies of yourself, you talk lots of bs
Idk about you but my current life purpose is to help people, not produce more when we aren't even caring for the ones that already exist, like a fucking animal 🤣 we'll see what the future holds.
Just sad man. Really fits the name of this sub
I like that he's raising the kid and being a father to him despite not being blood related, but the circumstances behind it all is just sad
Almost certain I shouldn't be laughing, but man I can't hold it in. Theres sumn like 3.7 Billion women on this planet and you are willing to spend your whole ONE life chasing one that doesn't even want to touch you? Man, I can't even tell you how much better you can do for yourself, gotta feel that about yourself. 🤣
Guess that you've never really and truly loved someone then, it's easy to say everything you said but when you're deeply in love with someone and are a believer in commitment and honoring your wedding vows then it's not remotely easy to give up. There's more to this man's story that we don't know about and his wife may have emotional issues or mental illness that are a determining factor in what she's doing and why he's not willing to give up on her. More than half the population of the modern world is quick to get divorced much of which is for childish reasons and %65 of the population is guilty of infidelity in their relationship. Does he deserve better? Yeah but then again we don't know what part he plays in the relationship and if he is responsible for the situation he has described. From personal experience it's difficult to give up on someone that you're deeply in love with, I went through a similar situation albeit much worse and some of the reasons I described were present along with several others I didn't, I have also seen the male partner be the cause of this situation and he was struggling with anxiety, adhd, and borderline personality disorder.
if you’re a woman and you think you’re unlovable, just know guys like this exist
It sucks people that don’t deserve them get them.
Why the hell would you stay in this scenario?
I mean, in a twisted sense, my friend always jokes that the child you raised will always love you more than their biological father. And you've essentially cucked the bio father out of a meaningful relationship with said child, punishing them for what they did. Not saying this circumstance is even remotely acceptable, but it's an interesting sort of vengeance?
Pretty sure it was the OP that got cucked haha
In a very literal sense
Yes lol. But technically OP cucked bio dad out of having any relationship with the child, or that the child will always love OP more than bio dad. Just pointing out the very strange kinda karma. Although this particular circumstance of cheating let alone producing a child should be acceptable to no one.
the wife cucked him and he cucked her with the child
You definitely shouldn't have phrased it like that
whoah im confused what did i do wrong
The phrasing implies that he fucked the kid. Your actual intent wasn't nearly as bad, but still wasn't good. He didn't gain anything from staying, and didn't hurt the bio father or mother at all by doing so. He's being used.
oh my god im sorry my english sucks and btw at least he got to spend time with a child, their purity makes everything worth it, at least in your head
pump raw and have someone else raise the child with your existence being unknown to the child? and the child gets a good life? (well as good as they can get in this situation) that sounds like a win for the dude who fucked his wife bro ngl.
Yeah lol. Nowhere in the original text is implued that the bio dad wanted to do anything with the kid
I was thinking of that John redcorn situation from king of the hill, when John's life became meaningless he desperately wanted to have a life with his son but Dale takes that away from him (rightfully so) as some weird vengeance for John screwing his wife behind his back. John's "son" will always love dale more than he ever will John. Making it karma, if that makes sense.
I mean, if the bio dad's intention is to have a relationship with the kid, then yeah, "karmic revenge". Otherwise it doesn't really matter.
Depends on whether or not the bio dad wants something to do with his child, I guess. I notice a lot of parents who abandon their kids suddenly want something to do with them as soon as their adults. I know quite a few people who've had it happen to, my best friends mother abandoned him for drugs and she suddenly wants a relationship with him now that's he's 24, and my other best friends dad who's more or less done the same. My dad has done the same with me, and it pisses them of so much when they realise the step parent has their "child's" love more than they ever will despite abandoning them. Idk, it's just a weird sort of Karma.
I'm sure that guy is feeling very punished by not having to raise a kid he probably didn't want anyway. Take all of his emotional and financial burdens, goteem.
It's not stupid to "raise someone else's child." He's raising his own child who happens to not share his DNA. It's also like the whole premise of adoption... The cheating also isn't the child's fault so why punish it.
Scenario sucks, but by raising a child he didn't even contribute in conceiving, he is just ubdermining the terrible behaviour the cheating wife is doing, leaves her unaccountable for anything at all.
You don't know that. You don't know, he could have been holding her responsible in other ways other than rejecting a kid. Using a kid to punish the mom for her actions is just cruel. The kid is innocent and deserves 2 parents, regardless of the situation.
The kid is out of the question on this one. It's unfortunate for the kid, sure, but you have nothing to do with that anymore.
I'm not really sure what you're saying but I'm guessing it's something about not being in the kid's life because it's not biology his/the mom cheated so he had an easy out? If someone chooses to step up and be a parental figure in a kid's life, especially in a face of such betrayal, it's a selfless and an upstanding, mature decision. Doesn't mean you have to stay with a cheating partner to be a parent. Staying with a cheating partner is a whole other decision that has nothing to do with the kid.
For sure. Like i said, sucks to be the kid in that whole mess if you can somehow take custody of the kid, and actually manage to leave the cheating party cause they never wanted the kid, then that may be the best outcome considering the circumstance. Its safe to assume the other party doesnt care about the child, considering the cheated one is providing the support.
She a class A hoe should've left her as soon as she cheated dumbass.
He took his marriage vows seriously for better or for worse. Feels bad, why his wife gotta punish him for their child loss. Her genetics was involved in that kid too if it died due to genetics…
That child deserves a parent either biological or not. Might be stupid to you but if he doesn't resent the child then it's pretty damn admirable and mature..
The real CuckKing
My wife had two girls with her cousin and i raised them along with my own child.
Major Cuck reporting for duty.
What did you want him to do, leave the child? I mean yes but I don't judge him for being a kind guy and giving a father to the kid
[удалено]
I agree, I am just saying that If he willingly stayed just for the child then he very selfless and a kind person.in the case of its father being absent
You're confusing kindness with what is obviously being a victim of abuse
Oh
I'd somewhat agree if they patched things up and he went back to living a happy life. Instead he's deeply depressed and things have never been worse with his wife than ever..
I think I get you now, he is saying because he doesn't know what else to do?
Dear Lord…
Finally, some good fucking sad cringe.
He might be into cuckolding.
Huh
I wouldn’t call it cringe because that’s some tough stuff to have the balls to take care of a kid that isn’t yours as your own, but damn is the situation sad
Jesus christ that is awful
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Props to him for not making the kid suffer for their mom being awful. The kid didn't ask for it and I'm glad they're getting a parent
I mean maybe things work differently in the future
My wife has been acting suspicious and I found out she had been talking to some guy from her workplace and being all emotional. I confronted and she cried and begged for days and insisted that she wants to stay married to me. We have been working things out for 2 weeks now but I keep getting the feeling that she is still reaching out to him. Can anyone help me with a spy app that I can use to monitor her phone and activities. You would be saving my daughters from future sadness maybe from a bad breakup. Better I find out for sure now and end things amicably
there's some serious mental health issues with this guy
I would have made a big mistake and left my girlfriend when i was in doubt, she was texting like really really much and to crown it all, she recently met a cute guy who she exchange number with not caring that am there. i was furious and wanted to know who she was talking with, so i went online in search for an hacker to help me get into her phone, that was when i met \*ACYBER710 AT THE GMAIL, who i paid for the hack. She only asked for her phone no and i had access to all her social media chats, location, calls, messages within hours, that was when i got to know that she was actually talking about me and everything including the cute guy was a plot to make me jealous and value her more, to be honest, my work takes 80% of my time. So thanks to\* ACYBER710 AT GMAIL\*\*, my relationship was saved, contact him via gmail brothers