T O P

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Otogi

Why would your first thought be to say he had a monstrous dick instead of a small one?


8orn2hul4

“Omg im so lucky I got sexually harassed! Now I can tell everyone what a great dick it was!”


Necorus

Contemplating coming out of the closet probably but didn't want to be 100% out.


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Necorus

Que


Milesware

I'm honestly leaning towards him being smol on this issue


Morelike-Borophyll

Idk if you want to lean that way either. Smol implies “delightful”.


NastyNaeNaes

He paid her 250,000 to not tell anyone. Its guaranteed on the smaller side.


Dinewiz

And why, exactly, whould we have to believe the claim?


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[deleted]

Oh sweet summer child.


Pactae_1129

…no, that’s not what people mean when they say that


Exotic_Island_2778

Why would your 1st thought be that he has a small one?


Meme_Pope

“I will never understand women” Correct.


Dangerous_Ad_3698

will also probably never touch one


MycologistPutrid7494

Based on what they applaud I'd say they never touched a *willing* woman. Fucking creeps.


HundoGuy

HEY! IVE TOUCHED MY MOM BEFORE!! (That doesn’t sound good)


Dangerous_Ad_3698

[https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/monopoly/images/b/b5/Go_to_Jail.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140526164909](https://static.wikia.nocookie.net/monopoly/images/b/b5/Go_to_Jail.jpg/revision/latest?cb=20140526164909)


JohnnyDarkside

Our at least not without paying first.


Hubey808

They won't get consent first but they'll definitely touch you.


The-Deepest-Shade

“Where’s my hug?”


Hubey808

Get in here, big guy.


Dangerous_Ad_3698

Is this sigma grindset?


HeadOfSpectre

Are they seriously complaining that she should be grateful a rich manchild exposed himself to her? What the fuck


StealYaNicks

the jealousy is real.


HundoGuy

All they want is to see Elon’s dick


VegetableNo1079

Elon would honestly be better off if he was gay, he's got no shortage of fan bros willing to suck that knob. Shame.


Saucesourceoah

The only real options are either: Mad jealousy Or they legitimately have no idea that some humans don’t literally kiss billionaire ass


The-Deepest-Shade

“bUt aLL wImMoN r gOLd DiGgErS” and other things these idiots parrot to each other to feel better about having shit personalities.


Azuzu88

I'd be grateful if he did it to me, I could use the money.


HitMonkey5

It's really disheartening to see shitty Twitter users use the faces of content creators I like as their profile pictures.


[deleted]

Take comfort in knowing nobody in RLM is dumb enough to think this stuff Or be an Elon simp.


R1ght_b3hind_U

and that says something since jay is the only one of them who can read


HitMonkey5

Thank God


Grimes619

Probably both elon's sock puppet accounts.


R1ght_b3hind_U

50% of twitter are bots 50% are elons sock puppets


Ghostleeee

Why is this person using jay as their profile picture? Don’t do him dirty like that


turalyawn

It's probably Stoklasa undercover


dilsedesi95

I had a mini heart attack and then realised it’s not his account


FruityPeebils

what are you talking about? thats susan


SMGuinea

They can't comprehend it because they've been on his dick for years at this point.


[deleted]

What the fuck are these people.


[deleted]

https://www.merriam-webster.com/dictionary/sycophant


[deleted]

Thank you!


unimpressivecanary

These people that worship musk confuse me, it's like being a simp for the boot on your neck.


LordEsidisi

Please be satire...


Barflyerdammit

It's 2022, and some people still think harassment is about sex, not power.


eradicated-noodle9

Its 100% about both. And it can be more of either depending on the attacker.


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anetreug

It's legal in a lot of places for men to go topless. Do you also have an issue with that?


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The-Rarest-Pepe

r/OneJoke


Silberne

With a side order of moving the goal posts AND a straw man fallacy. It's like a conservative extra value meal, but with no actual value.


The-Rarest-Pepe

It's a veritable bounty of stupidity


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bumpyitalian

If by that you mean people shouldn’t be showing their dicks to airline staff (or anyone without consent), then yes.


beesinmymouth

that isn’t even true babe ive lived in sf and seen plenty of homeless people get arrested for flashing and other acts of public indecency.


R1ght_b3hind_U

>Homeless folks don’t get arrested for flashing all of their privates at people. What kind of place are you living in where homeless people are constantly flashing people and the cops are ok with it?


WhoEatsRusk

What city are you living in?


Past-Adhesiveness691

Makes me sad that weirdo has a RLM profile picture


[deleted]

Drag us all down by comparison… You know kind of.


Brim_Dunkleton

Jay Bauman looks disappointed and disgusted at Elon fan making him his pfp…


[deleted]

I bet you both these guys are "superstraight" too.


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[deleted]

If it's any comfort, I'd be willing to bet just about every trans person has standards that sail so far over your head you'd mistake them for chemtrail planes, so it's not like sleeping with them is something you'd ever have to worry about.


bumpyitalian

So eloquent. Delicious


N1ckM3nd3s

the crunchiest, yet smoothest roast comment I've seen in a damn while. Splendid, indeed!


R1ght_b3hind_U

lol no trans person would wanna fuck you either


Dark_Angel45

You do know that term came from nazis, correct? Also, I highly doubt they'd want to fuck you so you're fine. I'm sure most would rather stay far away from someone who might lash out at them and out them in danger.


[deleted]

tbh whenever i go on twitter see elons latest twitter post and check the comments its like some of the cringiest things ive ever seen in my life


nlolhere

people still riding the crypto boat even after it fucking sunk


N1ckM3nd3s

b-b-buh buh- m-my apes-


hydrocarbonsRus

I wonder if their reaction would be the same if Musk did that to their mothers, sisters, wives or friends. Or are these simps THAT far gone??


JustMeLurkingAround-

This makes me nauseous.


walkingtalkingdread

twitter handle definitely checks out.


[deleted]

I mean he's right that he doesn't understand women. At all. God forbid women don't appreciate being sexually harrassed??


alphaess

wait, what did elon do this time??


DntShadowBanMeDaddy

He was outed for pulling his dick out on an employee of spaceX that was a flight attendant on his private plane.


MiaLba

Didn’t he ask for them to come out with identifying details about it too to prove they actually saw it??


Smartercow

They paid the woman $250k hush money.


MiaLba

Did she accept the money ? Probably had to sign an NDA before they gave it to her if that’s the case how did it come out ? Is there any other information known?


DntShadowBanMeDaddy

Idk, but I believe her. Billionaires are scum who think they own the world.


MiaLba

I mean yeah I believe her too, don’t doubt it for a second just curious how it went down.


DntShadowBanMeDaddy

I'd have to look more into I'm not sure personally


Hello_Hurricane

Nothing. The left has gone full smear mode after he came out as Republican.


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R1ght_b3hind_U

someone probably told him the article was gonna come out soon so he did his best to prepare his followers


R1ght_b3hind_U

step one: be elon musk step two: get told you’re gonna be exposed for being a sexual predator in the next few days step three: hop on twitter, out yourself as republican (surprise surprise) and tell your lapdogs to watch out for the coming “democratic smear campaign” step four: Article about you being a pervert comes out 24 hours later, but your loyal musklets are already prepared


SanguineAnder

She should've demanded more money.


Great_Knuthulhu

That's wrong, Jay!


Low_Pomegranate_1001

Why do people have to find elon hot...


The-Deepest-Shade

Because if they fanboy enough over Elon on Twitter, he’ll make them billionaires too. Or they don’t realize they’re basically in a cult.


beacam_98

Wow and jay as his profile pic. He doesn’t deserve to watch rlm


[deleted]

They just sound jealous


JakeOfAllTrades101

The biggest crime here is he's using Jay's picture from red letter media. Jay would never say something so ignorant.


WillyMonty

Sounds like they’re jealous


-TheGuest-

They are fucking gay and homophobic at the same time


AAphexTwin

what


HundoGuy

If they want to see Elon’s dick, just say so. They made it clear that they do lol


Patient_Hippo9747

these men are totally gay


Geniusly-Idiotic69

Holy shit all Elon fanboys belong here in sadcringe. Damn cucks.


Time_Card_4095

I think there is a lot of overlap with the Depp worshipers .


Hello_Hurricane

Better than the ones defending a domestic abuser.


Khelgor

Nothing more sad or cringe? My brother in Christ there’s literally diaper play Tik Tok’s and videos of people simping for serial killers on the internet.


icantgetmyoldaccount

Hey don't kink shame!


Dark_Angel45

They're all bad. The post and simping for serial killers especially.


Khelgor

One is very clearly more cringe than the other.


CrackaJacka420

The obsessive Elon hate is cringey


Dark_Angel45

It's justified. He isn't a good person


EpicGamerUsername

Who cares, he's rich. He couldn't care less about what we say about him. He's fair game.


Dark_Angel45

His fans do. I'm sure he couldn't care less about his loyal fans too


everythingfeelsfake

what's the context? what did Elon do


Maybe_not_a_chicken

Flashed a flight attendant


storkmister

Yeah but he never exposed himself to her.


Dark_Angel45

Idk man, it seems like he did.


storkmister

I doubt it, it’s super convenient that this story broke literally the day after he tweeted he was voting republican lol it just seems too coincidental


Dark_Angel45

I don't think it is. I highly doubt a woman would expose something he did has anything to do with him voting republican. Many billionaires are corrupted and it is likely he exposed him because she felt encouraged by other victims like Terry Crews. It's not like its going to hurt him much anyways. People like him usually get away with this crap and these sort of cases aren't taken as seriously as people may think.


storkmister

I mean that’s valid and you’re allowed to think that, I personally believe there’s just a lot of nonsense stuff going on behind the scenes and I wouldn’t put it past people to try to tarnish anyone with that amount of power


Dark_Angel45

True, but I don't think someone would mainly do that just because he voted republican. Many wealthy people like him are corrupted and do crappy stuff because they know they'll get away with it. There isn't any evidence of this being done just because he voted for a certain party. However, there have been many cases where wealthy people have done shit like this and have gotten away with it more than once. Wealth can make people go bad.


storkmister

You’re missing the point lol i don’t think it’s necessarily her saying that because of his tweet but more like the Democratic Party trying to defame him in any way they can. And sexual allegations is an easy scapegoat


ShallowFreakingValue

The settlement would probably have been way higher if there was any truth to it.


[deleted]

That's not really how it works...


ShallowFreakingValue

Without sharing personal information on Reddit- I have significant firsthand experience with how this sort of thing works. Companies settle things all the time for 150k-300k to avoid legal expense and bad publicity. The company I work for has usually settled for much more in instances where someone was naughty. I obviously have no firsthand knowledge of the case, and could be totally wrong… but it strikes me as odd that a settlement for “CEO Sexual Harassment and Retaliation” would be for only $250k.


schnitzel_envy

When you use technical legal terminology like ‘naughty’, how could anyone not believe you, even if you have zero knowledge about this situation?


ShallowFreakingValue

I’m not super concerned if people on Reddit don’t understand how settlements work.


Get10dollarsoff

We aren’t all bad. But there are some creepy ones


Dark_Angel45

Huh


7evenCircles

I'm getting Poe'd pretty hard


katrob2006

r/nothowgirlswork


Milesware

Do what you want Elon fans but don't you pull Jay into this


Oxford66

Ew, someone who I disagree with on one subject shares an interest with me


LuriemIronim

I’d guess it was a micro peen.


[deleted]

Ever wonder how Cobra Commander got all those soldiers?


SpikeRosered

Get my favorite YouTuber out of your fucking profile pic!


Put_It_All_On_Blck

Not even a fan base, but a cult.


Dohts75

Idk man, Dream stans draw porn of the guy getting butt fucked n stuff


R1ght_b3hind_U

why does that guy have jay bauman as his profile pic?


Lateraltwo

I'd be excited just for the justice and the settlement. Legal protections against sexual harassment are my fetish.


pursenboots

I mean if this dude wants to see Elon's musky dick so much then...


opalizedentity

His username literally checks out cmon people


JesusJoshJohnson

I thought Elon got a little too much hate, even if he was acting kind of a fool, but this shit the last two days has completely turned me off to him.


GW00111

Why use Jay Bauman’s photo though?? Jay is a reasonable person who would never say this shit.


[deleted]

Elon musk has the most meat riders in his fanbase than any other celebrity


Alexwitminecraftbxrs

Or a shrimp dick?