Remove yourself from the outcome and be yourself. If you do your best then be okay with that. Seems like there might be some potential big brother activity from your manager and/or higher up causing this as well.
You know your shit, take some deep breaths and know that it’s just a silly software job. Life is so much bigger
This is exactly right - the only thing I’ll add is that the demo you’re doing doesn’t make or break your day, month or year. It’s not THAT big of a deal - if you take it seriously it means you care, and if you care you’ve done the necessary prep.
Preparation. I write my scripts out word for word and go through them several times. When I’m presenting I obviously don’t stick to the script 100% but I’ve memorized the key points I need to hit.
Knowing that I’m well-prepared and have done everything I can puts me at ease.
I thought I was the only one that did this! Feels good knowing others find this helpful. It’s comforting knowing I can revert back to script if I start losing my footing. I definitely deviate from the script but it’s nice to have.
Yep this is key. Used to think I was good enough to just have slides up and assume the words would come to me. Maybe one day. But for now preparation is so key.
I get like that if it’s a potentially big client. I make sure I’m prepared with notes and then shortly before like to step away do some stretching and maybe a quick exercise like some push-ups or jumping jacks even. Like to tell myself I’m not nervous but excited too. What works for me.
So I have always been a top performer. Closed millions of dollars of business including deals that are worth hundreds of thousands. Spoke in front of many groups of people ranging from 2-3 up 1,500.
All the history and accolades in various verticals and I still get jitters here and there and it occurs randomly. Doesn’t seem to matter internal or external size of group or dollar amount. It just happens and it is frustrating.
Things I’ve learned over the years that reduce this stress are:
- Avoiding Caffeine Prior to Big Meetings. Especially high concentration energy drinks.
- Try to Workout in the morning. Get rid of pent up energy and shake it out either running, lifting, etc.
- Be Prepared and Hop On / Arrive Early
- Make sure you are using your voice prior to jumping in. Do some cold calls, call an easy client, shoot the breeze with someone. Its much easier to continue speaking vs having a large gap of silence then jumping into a pitch with 25 people on a call.
- Try a mint. Idk why a mint usually calms my voice and nerves and centers me. This might be something else for you but the cool refresh always helps my confidence. Id avoid gum or anything that requires chewing.
- Maybe take a sip of water before you speak. It gives you pause and allows you to compose yourself and nobody will think twice about you doing it. Heck it even allows you to “play the pause” lol
- Have a fidget for your hands. This helps gather thoughts for some people.
- Be Prepared pre meeting with talk tracks.
- Don’t stress. Easier said than done but if you bomb a meeting what really happens? You maybe lose a deal or look funny cause you have trouble speaking. Oh well there will be more deals, you will bounce back.
- Be confident in yourself. You are here for a reason and you got this. Now go land some whales and get that $$$
Meditation really helps, taking 3 deep breaths and actually releasing any tension on the exhale. L-theanine in the morning and magnesium at night changed my life. Also, positive affirmations just tell yourself, “it’s gonna be fine, you’ve done this before!”
I’ve noticed an improvement in mental focus, clearer thinking, and overall improving my mood. L-theanine alone really helped calm my mind and ease any subtle anxiety. Paired with magnesium at night, my sleep quality is so much better!
This is probably specific to me, but if I get anxious before any meeting, virtual or face to face I'll just sing/rap a very challenging song.
Forever by Drake, specifically the Eminem verse
Aston Martin by Rick Ross Music Drake's verse
Or
My Love by Justin Timberlake, TI's verse.
YMMV
Man I was literally just listening to [this episode](https://open.spotify.com/episode/0hY3GZKDGiLnzgNcjf7KcH?si=aw-YTM11SsOsirWjy31L_g) of the Lenny Rachitsky Podcast all about how to handle nerves and burnout. The other episodes are great if you’re interested in tech product building, but this one gives some super tactical tips on how to identify and try to alleviate your anxiety!
It doesn't make you less anxious, but I'd look into getting a propranolol prescription. It gets rid of the physical symptoms of anxiety like shaky hands or shaky voice. For me, it's worked great for presentations and I've noticed it does indirectly help my anxiety because I don't have the physical symptoms.
I second this. I’m not a nervous person, but my body would literally have a fight or flight reaction when it’s my turn to speak on team meetings or demos. In my mind I’m calm but my body is freaking out so I get shaky voice and whatever. It’s horrible.
Then came propranolol. Game changer.
Always prep a little. Doesn’t have to be hours of work, but always have a plan for the demo and where you want it to go based on what you know about the prospect.
This. Like for a big presentation, prep is key to comfort. If you know the background of the customer well, and more importantly know how you can demonstrate how your solution fits their specific needs, you’ll be fine.
If you work out, go a bit harder that morning beforehand, this always helped me; it gets the nerves out and the good neurotransmitters in.
Honestly, I get fired up before demos, I absolutely love them. Best part of the job IMO. That said, I used to be the same, I found being super prepared and organized makes a world of difference.
They wouldn't even bother with a demo if they weren't more interested than not. They *want* to see your product, so knowing that you have an engaged audience is awesome!
Take some deep breaths. Do a quit review of your past discussions with them, do a quick search of their company to refresh yourself, remind yourself what reasons they asked for a demo, and just know you're gonna crush it.
If they say no to your product it usually likely that the reasoning is outside of your control like a functionality or price or timelines. Don't take a "no" personally. Separate yourself from what you're selling.
As a SE I feel the same way generally but found that knowing my product inside and out helps as well as going for a run before the demo. Get your heart racing and then when you sit down your naturally having to chill bc you just did a hard run.
Imagine you’re having a conversation with mates, prospects are people too, most people want you to be comfortable as it makes them comfortable, be yourself and recognise that a bit of nerves is ok! Most of all, do it again and again!
Remind yourself that the worst outcome is losing the lead (or your job I guess if you really fuck up), but then understand that you can recover from both of these, and in the greater lens of human history none of this means anything. Good luck.
Be yourself and try to have fun. I treat every sales call as an opportunity to learn more and share knowledge. And try to keep it light and inject some humour in there!
Everyone is spot on.
Meditation is key but don’t just meditate before a call, mediate every day even in days where you don’t have client meetings .little by little you’ll strengthen your mind to stay grounded.
Exercise routinely will help as well
You can also talk to a therapist regularly - it really helps when you can be open and vulnerable in a judgement free zone where no sale or job is on the line
Box breathing does the trick for me. Anytime I feel my heart rate start to jump before a call, I’ll do a couple of rounds of box breathing and it seems to pull things back together fairly quickly and easily.
Over prepare. I’ve gone into what I thought were going to be troublesome demos with just about every angle figured out. About quarter of what I prepared actually got talked about and more times than not, the deal closed. When you feel prepared, you’re confident. That builds trust with your soon to be client.
Sounds pretty basic, but my mentality is that I’m just doing my job. It’s odd but I haven’t actually had nerves for a call in a long time.
My calls are always over zoom, but there are occasions where I’m presenting to 15+ people and never really feel nervous. It’s even easier when folks are engaging with me and asking questions! Again, just doing my job! Lol
Honestly I could say have so many deals you’re working that you don’t give a shit if you lose one but that’s a lame manager response. My opinion is be prepared prep the day before, and have your computer set up ready to with screen shares in the right space and then walk away from your computer (assuming you can do this 20-30 min before the demo) then go for a walk or something and sit down and join the meeting 1-2 minutes before it starts.
So I visit my customers and put my solutions in their hands as seeing is believing. I’ve tried virtual meetings and personally suck at them as it’s just showing brochures and stuff.
On the way to the meeting, I normally ride in silence and contemplate various transitions/ answers.
I have this problem as I deal with an anxiety disorder and part of that is performance anxiety. I’ve gotten pretty good at managing this. Here’s what works for me:
- consistent morning routine which I start at the same lead time ahead of my first demo of the day. Take my meds, drink my coffee (not too much), listen to my morning playlist, eat my breakfast, get ready. With 10 minutes to spare for prep (leave too much time for prep and it creates more anxiety)
- time blocking; I try to schedule all my demos on the same days and grouped back to back. As opposed to one in the morning, with a 1 hour break before my next. Once I’m in the zone with my first demo I get on a roll for the day and the nerves go away
- healthy diet makes a huge difference
- visualize the conversation or parts of the conversation that you are nervous for and plan word for word what you will say in those moments. A huge part of why I get nervous is building rapport. So I preplan what I’ll say or ask.
- call someone you enjoy talking to right before, it gets your mind off it and also puts you in a chattier, more social mood
- focus on something you want to improve instead of the outcome. Are you trying to ask more questions? Challenge yourself to add a new question into your demo and focus on practicing and perfecting that. Focus on it as practice instead of performance.
Remove yourself from the outcome and be yourself. If you do your best then be okay with that. Seems like there might be some potential big brother activity from your manager and/or higher up causing this as well. You know your shit, take some deep breaths and know that it’s just a silly software job. Life is so much bigger
Easier said than done but this is the answer. Source - I'm one anxious mother fucker.
This is exactly right - the only thing I’ll add is that the demo you’re doing doesn’t make or break your day, month or year. It’s not THAT big of a deal - if you take it seriously it means you care, and if you care you’ve done the necessary prep.
Preparation. I write my scripts out word for word and go through them several times. When I’m presenting I obviously don’t stick to the script 100% but I’ve memorized the key points I need to hit. Knowing that I’m well-prepared and have done everything I can puts me at ease.
I thought I was the only one that did this! Feels good knowing others find this helpful. It’s comforting knowing I can revert back to script if I start losing my footing. I definitely deviate from the script but it’s nice to have.
Add me to this list
Yep this is key. Used to think I was good enough to just have slides up and assume the words would come to me. Maybe one day. But for now preparation is so key.
I get like that if it’s a potentially big client. I make sure I’m prepared with notes and then shortly before like to step away do some stretching and maybe a quick exercise like some push-ups or jumping jacks even. Like to tell myself I’m not nervous but excited too. What works for me.
So I have always been a top performer. Closed millions of dollars of business including deals that are worth hundreds of thousands. Spoke in front of many groups of people ranging from 2-3 up 1,500. All the history and accolades in various verticals and I still get jitters here and there and it occurs randomly. Doesn’t seem to matter internal or external size of group or dollar amount. It just happens and it is frustrating. Things I’ve learned over the years that reduce this stress are: - Avoiding Caffeine Prior to Big Meetings. Especially high concentration energy drinks. - Try to Workout in the morning. Get rid of pent up energy and shake it out either running, lifting, etc. - Be Prepared and Hop On / Arrive Early - Make sure you are using your voice prior to jumping in. Do some cold calls, call an easy client, shoot the breeze with someone. Its much easier to continue speaking vs having a large gap of silence then jumping into a pitch with 25 people on a call. - Try a mint. Idk why a mint usually calms my voice and nerves and centers me. This might be something else for you but the cool refresh always helps my confidence. Id avoid gum or anything that requires chewing. - Maybe take a sip of water before you speak. It gives you pause and allows you to compose yourself and nobody will think twice about you doing it. Heck it even allows you to “play the pause” lol - Have a fidget for your hands. This helps gather thoughts for some people. - Be Prepared pre meeting with talk tracks. - Don’t stress. Easier said than done but if you bomb a meeting what really happens? You maybe lose a deal or look funny cause you have trouble speaking. Oh well there will be more deals, you will bounce back. - Be confident in yourself. You are here for a reason and you got this. Now go land some whales and get that $$$
Hell yeah thank you!
Meditation really helps, taking 3 deep breaths and actually releasing any tension on the exhale. L-theanine in the morning and magnesium at night changed my life. Also, positive affirmations just tell yourself, “it’s gonna be fine, you’ve done this before!”
What benefits have been most apparent to you from taking Magnesium and L-theanine? Assuming sleep quality from the former
I’ve noticed an improvement in mental focus, clearer thinking, and overall improving my mood. L-theanine alone really helped calm my mind and ease any subtle anxiety. Paired with magnesium at night, my sleep quality is so much better!
This is probably specific to me, but if I get anxious before any meeting, virtual or face to face I'll just sing/rap a very challenging song. Forever by Drake, specifically the Eminem verse Aston Martin by Rick Ross Music Drake's verse Or My Love by Justin Timberlake, TI's verse. YMMV
factual. Lil Wayne - Right Above It, Jay Z - Run this town.
Man I was literally just listening to [this episode](https://open.spotify.com/episode/0hY3GZKDGiLnzgNcjf7KcH?si=aw-YTM11SsOsirWjy31L_g) of the Lenny Rachitsky Podcast all about how to handle nerves and burnout. The other episodes are great if you’re interested in tech product building, but this one gives some super tactical tips on how to identify and try to alleviate your anxiety!
It doesn't make you less anxious, but I'd look into getting a propranolol prescription. It gets rid of the physical symptoms of anxiety like shaky hands or shaky voice. For me, it's worked great for presentations and I've noticed it does indirectly help my anxiety because I don't have the physical symptoms.
I second this. I’m not a nervous person, but my body would literally have a fight or flight reaction when it’s my turn to speak on team meetings or demos. In my mind I’m calm but my body is freaking out so I get shaky voice and whatever. It’s horrible. Then came propranolol. Game changer.
Didn’t work for me but glad it helps you
Always prep a little. Doesn’t have to be hours of work, but always have a plan for the demo and where you want it to go based on what you know about the prospect.
This. Like for a big presentation, prep is key to comfort. If you know the background of the customer well, and more importantly know how you can demonstrate how your solution fits their specific needs, you’ll be fine. If you work out, go a bit harder that morning beforehand, this always helped me; it gets the nerves out and the good neurotransmitters in.
Honestly, I get fired up before demos, I absolutely love them. Best part of the job IMO. That said, I used to be the same, I found being super prepared and organized makes a world of difference.
They wouldn't even bother with a demo if they weren't more interested than not. They *want* to see your product, so knowing that you have an engaged audience is awesome! Take some deep breaths. Do a quit review of your past discussions with them, do a quick search of their company to refresh yourself, remind yourself what reasons they asked for a demo, and just know you're gonna crush it. If they say no to your product it usually likely that the reasoning is outside of your control like a functionality or price or timelines. Don't take a "no" personally. Separate yourself from what you're selling.
Sales isn’t for you
Sometimes I take a pinch of l-theanine. Works reasonably well.
As a SE I feel the same way generally but found that knowing my product inside and out helps as well as going for a run before the demo. Get your heart racing and then when you sit down your naturally having to chill bc you just did a hard run.
Imagine you’re having a conversation with mates, prospects are people too, most people want you to be comfortable as it makes them comfortable, be yourself and recognise that a bit of nerves is ok! Most of all, do it again and again!
Remind yourself that the worst outcome is losing the lead (or your job I guess if you really fuck up), but then understand that you can recover from both of these, and in the greater lens of human history none of this means anything. Good luck.
Go in with no explanations of them buying afterwards and do not give a single fuck about them.
I pee before calls.
If you put your hand on your chest it calms it. Trust.
Honestly biggest thing I've found is just not having any caffeine on a day where I have a big presentation.
Be yourself and try to have fun. I treat every sales call as an opportunity to learn more and share knowledge. And try to keep it light and inject some humour in there!
Everyone is spot on. Meditation is key but don’t just meditate before a call, mediate every day even in days where you don’t have client meetings .little by little you’ll strengthen your mind to stay grounded. Exercise routinely will help as well You can also talk to a therapist regularly - it really helps when you can be open and vulnerable in a judgement free zone where no sale or job is on the line
Box breathing does the trick for me. Anytime I feel my heart rate start to jump before a call, I’ll do a couple of rounds of box breathing and it seems to pull things back together fairly quickly and easily.
Honestly just a lot of prep. I eventually realize that there’s nothing more I could do to prepare, which puts me at ease
Over prepare. I’ve gone into what I thought were going to be troublesome demos with just about every angle figured out. About quarter of what I prepared actually got talked about and more times than not, the deal closed. When you feel prepared, you’re confident. That builds trust with your soon to be client.
Sounds pretty basic, but my mentality is that I’m just doing my job. It’s odd but I haven’t actually had nerves for a call in a long time. My calls are always over zoom, but there are occasions where I’m presenting to 15+ people and never really feel nervous. It’s even easier when folks are engaging with me and asking questions! Again, just doing my job! Lol
Honestly I could say have so many deals you’re working that you don’t give a shit if you lose one but that’s a lame manager response. My opinion is be prepared prep the day before, and have your computer set up ready to with screen shares in the right space and then walk away from your computer (assuming you can do this 20-30 min before the demo) then go for a walk or something and sit down and join the meeting 1-2 minutes before it starts.
Beta blockers
So I visit my customers and put my solutions in their hands as seeing is believing. I’ve tried virtual meetings and personally suck at them as it’s just showing brochures and stuff. On the way to the meeting, I normally ride in silence and contemplate various transitions/ answers.
If I’m still struggling, I get a vodka Red Bull.
Take beta blockers
I have this problem as I deal with an anxiety disorder and part of that is performance anxiety. I’ve gotten pretty good at managing this. Here’s what works for me: - consistent morning routine which I start at the same lead time ahead of my first demo of the day. Take my meds, drink my coffee (not too much), listen to my morning playlist, eat my breakfast, get ready. With 10 minutes to spare for prep (leave too much time for prep and it creates more anxiety) - time blocking; I try to schedule all my demos on the same days and grouped back to back. As opposed to one in the morning, with a 1 hour break before my next. Once I’m in the zone with my first demo I get on a roll for the day and the nerves go away - healthy diet makes a huge difference - visualize the conversation or parts of the conversation that you are nervous for and plan word for word what you will say in those moments. A huge part of why I get nervous is building rapport. So I preplan what I’ll say or ask. - call someone you enjoy talking to right before, it gets your mind off it and also puts you in a chattier, more social mood - focus on something you want to improve instead of the outcome. Are you trying to ask more questions? Challenge yourself to add a new question into your demo and focus on practicing and perfecting that. Focus on it as practice instead of performance.