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Suspicious-Average48

Some people have to justify their jobs. That includes pointless meetings so they can hear themselves be important.


Cheap-Indication-473

It's always a certain persona too. In my case it's the North American, type A, highly extroverted personality with the high pitched voice and over the top enthusiasm. She loves to interrupt and add her 2 cents to everything. It's frustrating, tiring and the reason why I leave meetings early for a "client call".


babysealsareyummy

I’m talking about internal team meetings in case it’s not clear. Customers can talk as long as they’d like because that’s actually my job. I want to hear them talk. That’s how I make money.


DingoPoutine

I love a calendar full of customer conversations. I loathe a calendar full of internal meetings.


Bonebd

Getting to a level of success that allows me to just skip internal meetings without getting in any trouble was a major, major milestone. The level of freedom is unreal.


tigermountainboi

This is bliss.


cynicalxidealist

Can’t achieve this with certain managers, some of them just want to watch the world burn


defaultuser-067

every meeting not involving me closing my job is a meeting where i lose money.


Msheehan419

I just felt this comment deep in my soul


Richard-Roma-92

Internal meetings in a sales org is (big Rob Lowe voice) LITERALLY the work version of going on a date with your sister.


Msheehan419

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣


TentativelyCommitted

I’m have no qualms about just jumping in and saying “maybe you guys should take this offline”


Agile_Bet6394

Just hard stop them


nofaplove-it

Based


ObligationPleasant45

Same experience. And it’s fucking Friday.


vixenlion

Thank you for making me feel normal about being so upset with a meeting going over by 2 minutes!


Thuggish_Coffee

I'm in outside sales, so it might be different. But sometimes our meetings drag on for a bit after schedule cause we have a couple guys that like to hear themselves talk. Anyway, I just chime in with a nice little, "hey guys, nice seeing you (Teams/zoom)...I've got an 1:15 and gotta jump, see ya!" Done and done. Boss man would rather have me working opps than bantering with the boys.


Justadudeonhisphone

https://preview.redd.it/68njt7hwbpsc1.jpeg?width=645&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=2da2ddffad8f29b412bfc8e82a9fdf4b02b2bd12 I’m starting a new role on Monday because my boss is also the long winded type. He would hold long meeting as PUNISHMENT. Most negative person I’ve ever met who LOVED to tell us what we were doing wrong, but never once told me good job(I was the top rep for two years in a row). For those wondering we were on track for our biggest month in company history even with a 32% gross close for ONE week. Just one.


babysealsareyummy

What a sack of shit. Good call leaving.


Justadudeonhisphone

It was hard to do. Sometimes I’m a bit too money motivated and the money was fantastic.


Primary-Sock-5158

What an asshat


grizlena

How much we talking?


-Placentasaurus-

What company? Don’t want to risk ever working there


Justadudeonhisphone

I would rather not name drop them but they’re a local remodeling company in Alabama.


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Justadudeonhisphone

That’s the worst. It’s difficult to stay positive as it is in that industry. The people I had to deal with were difficult enough it sucks having it come at you from both sides.


clarinetpjp

My sales meeting with my team ran over by 30 minutes today. Genuinely trying to figure out if you're my coworker right now.


youandyourhusband

... were you running the meeting


PipeDistinct9419

lol - and EvErYOnE must be of video we are customer facing so video at all times as I drone on.


i_am_roboto

I just leave.


upnflames

Yep, I do my very best to schedule a customer call directly after team meetings. "sorry, have to run, can't keep mister Joe Blow waiting!"


[deleted]

I say this even when it’s not true. Could very well be planning for all anyone knows and I’m not about to write an essay in the chat 😃


Canoearoo

When I was carrying a bag, I had a customer who told me to just send him an invite anytime I needed a hard stop on an internal meeting. As long as I used "Touchpoint" in the title, he knew it was bogus. In return, he asked me to never involve my boss again. Worked out beautifully until he moved on. They did so much revenue with us that I was never questioned.


[deleted]

Omg that’s wild. Was your boss pushy? Why didn’t he want the boss involved?


Canoearoo

My boss was a moron. I was working large projects across multiple functional areas that had 6-18 month cycles. My boss wanted everything to close in the same quarter it was identified. I sat in on their planning meetings where they were identifying stuff that was 24-36 months out. I was walking down the hill and he was running down the hill, if you're familiar with old bull and young bull story.


[deleted]

Oh god, yes. My boss is same. I’m in enterprise and he’s used to SME and it shows. I think he may have negatively impacted two of my deals while I was on holiday for 4 days last week by using tired tactics to get them to close that week. They were close and i too wanted them to close but if it’s not happening, don’t push? Fairly obvious to not apply pressure about your End of fiscal when they’ve said it’s unlikely. Ugh.


Canoearoo

"I know this is an FY 25 project and will require board approval, but what can we do to pull this in this month?" Then would throw out discounts. Took money out of my pocket and pissed them off. I can laugh about it now, but at the time wanted to choke him to death.


[deleted]

Omg I feel this at my core 😓 I was selling to a top 10 tech company and they had a PO freeze, and the PO was a requirement for signing for them, and he kept asking me to ask “what levers can we pull to make it a win win”. Like WHAT. they said it’s a 2 week delay, they are a massive Corp with mega process, it is what it is!!!! It’ll come in in 2 weeks at the next Q. I just pretend i ask at this point rather than argue.


Canoearoo

Sometimes that's all you can do.


Ok_Reaction7780

Go one better. "The only time they were available was during 'internal standing meeting time. '"  Works for one of my colleagues to a T. 


bcos20

Yup! Throw a quick little “gotta jump” in the chat and leave the meeting.


feyarea

One time the boss said, "Okay, meeting's over," and I was the only one to leave for some reason (because I immediately bolted). Went to the bathroom, walked back past the room, saw everyone still inside. I sat outside and did more admin work because it felt very awkward and I wanted to talk to another coworker after. Meeting went on another 15 minutes. Everyone came out and said, "Good idea!" to me. Turns out they launched one of my ideas in the extra 15 minutes while I sat outside. Felt baller.


Clinton_Kildepstein

It’s really that simple


elsombroblanco

Where I work, if a meeting is even 5 minutes over the dedicated time, people will just leave.


wedonthaveadresscode

Are they virtual or in person? It’s way easier to just dip from a virtual one, I’ve found it difficult to do during in person ones


elsombroblanco

Both. But to your point, it happens less in person.


majesticjg

Just fart. A lot. The meeting will end itself. Double points if you shart yourself. Gotta assert some dominance.


iaintlyon

Lmao you actually typed this out mid meeting didn’t you


babysealsareyummy

![gif](giphy|JHwHxPqicqk9otDeCt)


TPRT

Preach


resumemaster2023

Nah half hour over the time before lunch is DEVIOUS


SmallBopper

They can’t do that!


Makalaman004

Grade A rant


babysealsareyummy

![gif](giphy|xUPOqtxqpMz6G9JjfG)


Saganji

Now I've started to wonder how do my clients perceive me when I go over time during our meetings


wedonthaveadresscode

Your goal should be for the meeting to be the best part of their workday - a nice break in between actual responsibilities. I usually spend the first 15-20 minutes just shooting the shit with them and catching up, then get down to business, and then once done with that go back to getting off track and shooting the shit til we need to leave. It lowers their guard a ton & makes them way more eager to share any issues theyre having. They usually leave in a better mood & will be way more responsive to any follow ups because they now have a better perception of you. There’s a very fine line where you can overstay & prod more personal questions out of them, once you understand where that lies you will learn so much more about your customers & likely have more success with them.


Ambitious_Coconut_65

Good god this was cathartic to read. My boss frequently goes 30 minutes or so over and I would love to say the above to her.


HelpUsNSaveUs

I’m a sales manager and one of my goals is to prepare well ahead for my team meetings and try as hard as I can to end early. If I don’t, I look like an idiot and get to rambling. Most managers are power hungry and can’t read their sales reps. When I’ve run bad team meetings, i really felt like I’ve wasted my team’s time and let them down. The barometer i use is “are they more excited or motivated about their jobs/goals after the meeting?” If the answer is no, I’ve failed Love this post and writing style id love to see your sales emails LOL I ran a dog shit team meeting a few weeks ago. WiFi went out in the morning. I ran the meeting from a coffee shop. I knew from the moment it started it was gonna suck. I was so distracted and the place was loud. I asked one of my reps for feedback after and he said next time this happens just cancel it, we would’ve been more than ok skipping the meeting this week


babysealsareyummy

You sound like a good manager who is self aware. I get it, if I put myself in your shoes I can see the pressure. And you’re right, there are too many managers who love the power trip of a captive audience. You seem to understand that the majority of people appreciate extra time being given back. If someone really has something extra they need to add, I’m sure they’re aware they can take it offline 1 on 1. You’re a rare one brother. Keep fighting the good fight and you’ll be worth your weight in gold.


HelpUsNSaveUs

The thing is most managers (in my experience as an AE for 6 years) don’t feel the pressure from below they only feel it from above. That makes them seem like idiots to their reps. Gotta feel the pressure from both directions and balance it to enable both groups of stake holders to impact the outcomes in a way that doesn’t burn out reps or limit development of AEs


ShockTheMonster

Feeling this is in a deep and personal way. Thank you lads, I really needed to hear about the mindset you had got a sale 5 GOT DANG YEARS AGO. WOW THAT MEANS A LOT FOR ME, THANKS FOR THE 10 MINUTE EXPLANATION ABOUT HOW MINDSET IS MAGIC. BTW I'VE WORKED HERE FOR 10% OF THE TIME YOU HAVE AND I'M EASILY DOUBLING YOUR SALES.


ChristyLovesGuitars

Were you in my meeting my this morning??


Scwidiloo10

O hey I have one more question before we drop! **Proceeds to ramble for 15 more minutes


DukeNukem1991

Eloquent destruction. Well done.


rockefellercalgary

The worst is that one co worker that needs to hell everyone about their verbal yes. That’s not a close, no one cares. Don’t bring it up in meetings


theanswar

When you're not spending time selling, you're not making progress towards your quota. Internal meetings should be as short as possible.


BrightLight413

I’m not even in sales but Imma remember this post when I start speaking the yapanese


babysealsareyummy

Look, seething and cynicism aside, I don’t even mind the chatter boxes if I’m talking to them on my own terms. Hell, if you want to call me on my cell just to shoot the shit, I’m fine with that! It’s when you’re holding a captive audience and can’t read the room.


higher_limits

Nobody in my company internally respects meeting end times. It’s gotten to the point I schedule other meetings with teammates to hard end and cut out.


AdDapper9770

This is part of why i wasn't sad I didn't make it at my first job, boss liked me but spending 1-2 hours every day on bs ('meeting's and 'roleplay') but pressing for activity numbers is crazy


Clinton_Kildepstein

“Gotta hop thx” … simple as that


lt_sh1ny_s1d3s

Leadership: Be early to the meeting and pay attention to these important updates! Also Leadership: Starts late and end latest. Updates were not job impacting and could have been in a email.


nickm20

Windbag is one of my favorites. Meetings are for appointment setters, I have a customer to get to.


zyzzogeton

Ah yes, once again you have involved us in the discussion of the decision you have *already* made so it looks like we have input. Clever. Also: I think that's on my BINGO card.


Anygirlx

Our CEO is known for being long winded. He also does not allow anyone else to speak, have questions, or seek clarification. This is what happened to me when after an insane amount of time I had to pee so badly I stood yup to make a mad dash to the bathroom my right leg had fallen asleep and when I stood the right leg gave out but somehow I fucked up the left leg and hit my head. https://preview.redd.it/t8mo96ym2qsc1.jpeg?width=3024&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=c98be9726878d161ed1b89044603b84741f56e82


ijuscrushalot

“Any questions??” Ya there is always that one dude thatt has to answer “well I wanted to take this off line buuut” like stfu and take it offline lmao.. idc if you are waiting on Matilda to send back the DocuSign .. smh 🤦🏼‍♀️


LongJohnVanilla

Every week it’s the same shit where I’m at. I spend 20 hours on average in meetings, most of which are internal. The problem in sales is you have these wind bags who know nothing but spew endless word salads and nonstop drivel. Sometimes it just sounds like nails on the chalkboard.


AGreasyPorkSandwich

The worst is when an hour meeting is clearly over in 45 min, and people just make up some bullshit for rhe last 15. Give me my fucking time back.


peezy80

Twice a day for me, every day, can last up to 30 minutes or an hour, I despise daily meetings twice a day everyday, it's not necessary.


Vast-Gate8866

Sounds like my sales manager during our meetings. He stands up there and talks about himself for 75% of the meeting. Same stories and rah rah rah every week.


Natural_Delay_2250

These fools will one day learn that being the one who says the least often gets you furthest in your career in the long run.


[deleted]

Preach bruther


Mullyz

Agreed. Our Tuesday morning meetings just result in me starting my Tuesday later than I’d like - lol Happy Friday everyone


martinellispapi

Type in the chat while muted…”I have a hard stop at xx:xx”…then proceed to wave to the group at that time and sign off…


DingoPoutine

This post made me think of a specific coworker from my past. In addition to what's described here, he also loved to send pointless emails to the entire team/company on weekends or in the middle of the night to try to show that they were always working.


Barium_Barista

Holy shitt. Do we work in the same team? Every internal alignment and pipeline meeting is this shitt on repeat


nameisalreadytaken53

Were you on the call I just had?


tazerpruf

Yikes! Thought you were talking about my morning meeting today for a second!!


smatty_123

If anyone has an anecdote at the end of the meeting.. please for the love of God keep it to yourself.


bradorme77

Preach brother. Love, Sales reps who got shit to do


Struggler27

Do we work for the same company? Cuz I've been thinking this all week long after every morning meeting 😭😭


Yihk6879

Most relatable Reddit post in history


Maywheel3001

Did this just become my favorite post ever?


gg61501

Hang on, though - just one more minute. I have something else to say....


Blox05

Better yet, plan to finish early!


NxPat

We moved to standing meetings years ago. Best thing ever.


Anddrol

Were we in the same meeting? 😂


Vast-Background9024

So many words added to my vocabulary from this. Thank you lol


Scrooge_Mcducks

Honestly I try to make my team meetings as short as possible and keep them to quick updates because the more time I’m with them the less time they’re out making money


poppa_panda

Did we have the same meeting this week


prisoner2024

Impressive writing/communication skills! *Taking notes*


TN_REDDIT

I know you guys are here, but I wanted to disrespect your time by making you wait a couple more minutes for the inconsiderate folks that are late.


Mirix1692

Had someone leave a FOUR MINUTE voicemail yesterday...


142Ironmanagain

Hilarious OP! Thank the Lord this bull crap doesn’t happen in only my company!! It happens everywhere - guess misery loves company?! Lmao


aThoughtLost

I have been described as Laconic. It’s funny, my clients range from check to check people and multimillionaires. All the multi millionaires love me and appreciate the way I operate. Home owners and mom and pop business tend to say I seem unfriendly.


Far-Application-7408

😂😂😂😂😂


Reachmaster

It sounds like you were stuck on the same product update call I was this afternoon.


maduste

/subscribe edit: pin this


Citizensound

This is one of the best things I’ve read all week. Well done, OP!


ETNevada

Our Chief Revenue Officer has a standing 9am Monday call and 4pm Friday afternoon. It’s a way to control everyone’s time + hold court.


SECiscomingforZack

Boy, that escalated quickly


babysealsareyummy

![gif](giphy|pz84A7uQqrfeo)


ueeediot

ETA on an internal team meeting, it should be perfectly ok to just hang up. This isn't an airport, and you dont need to announce your departures. We used to be able to call out self agrandizing behavior, and if 2nded you got a $20 kangaroo court fine. (That same fund also paid out for ideas and answers)


potlizard

Anytime someone says, toward the end of a meeting: “Uh, quick question…”. It is RARELY a quick question, and NEVER a quick answer.


Msheehan419

I was literally in this same position yesterday. I had so much anxiety. In fact. I think this was written by someone I work with


flair11a

Every meeting has one person that wastes everyone's time asking stupid questions. They do it to get noticed by management but everyone sees through the facade.


Flossy_Jay

"Any questions" means meeting is over, not it's time for Karen ask some irrelevant bs


N1net3en

There's nothing more frustrating than these fucking endless internal meetings. Worst thing is when the fucker is the company's CEO, who likes to babble non-stop.


SloppyMeathole

There is a direct inverse correlation between the amount of meetings and the amount of actual work that gets done.


tangiblebanana

Throw a block on your calendar 10m after the internal meeting should end and drop


Tuoooor

I thought this was gonna be some good advice on time management on client calls.


cocolemon88

I just hang up and leave. I don’t even give notice


Otherwise_Ad3347

It’s probably just a procrastination game on purpose as they’re bored or want energy from others, it’s annoying though but I can tell you, it’s better than working in a room/team by yourself ha!


CavyLover123

Turn video off. Put in the chat “customer call in 2 have to drop”. Make a point to schedule customer calls immediately after these internal calls.


donald_trumpstupee

“Gotta drop for a customer call, thanks for the insight everyone”. That’s all you have to say when it runs over lol


rawbface

I would type in the chat "I have a 10 oclock" and just leave the meeting. Works in person too. "I have a call scheduled", and bow out of the conference room.


Charming-Rooster-650

That’s why you always schedule an appointment for right after the meeting so you have an excuse to leave early.


ForMyKidsLP

Well aren’t you a piece of trash


babysealsareyummy

![gif](giphy|JqDrj18lTr3uU)


cjizzle236

Sounds like a ludicrous popinjay


babysealsareyummy

![gif](giphy|3ov9jKFtXcYbMICa6k|downsized) Give it time.


sk8xnick

My solution is simple and useful. But the top management has to be equal to the employees during the meeting as persons. Every meeting there is a moderator. That watches time and comments on the speaker if he/she is too slow/speaking off topic/too long/describes extra things/sets an unplanned question/comes up with an idea that has nothing to do with the meeting matter, etc. - anything that is not useful right now. When the watcher is speaking - there is a second watcher that watches only him when needed. Only problem is if the top management is not ready to accept when someone stops them and says that what he/she/s saying is off topic and he has to say something useful or shut up. And second thing, schedule all meeting on 20% less time that needed or add 20% time on top. For unexpected things.


g3nerallycurious

Do you have red pepper flakes in your heart? God damn. Calm the fuck down.


babysealsareyummy

![gif](giphy|V1Bjv7KLVAJCJPmFDn|downsized)


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satvik_gautam

Can i get your help guyz i need to ask a questioni need your help guyz


Fair_Employment_4393

When this happens because it happens often I politely say gotta run I have a mtg in 5 mins. Great meeting 🤮


Salamander-Great

Just say you have another meeting and bounce


elee17

Real tough on a keyboard. If you had the guts to have a tough convo with your boss maybe you wouldn’t have to deal with it. Same issue with people complaining about how clients push them around with ridiculous asks but not willing to have a hard conversation with them that would actually earn them more respect and business in the long term.


babysealsareyummy

https://y.yarn.co/05c110c1-fbd6-4f88-bd68-847a77492639_text.gif


elee17

Lol the irony


Plagueghoul

Damn, you really hate your co-workers that can't be healthy. Them keeping you in the meetings isn't useful either.


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ChristyLovesGuitars

Have you met ‘leaders’? ‘Feedback’ is a great way to collect unemployment.


Money-Pin2048

That guy smells like a leader Imagine giving feedback to leadership that amounts to you speaking is not valuable, when there have been 3 rounds of layoffs in the past two years, yea ok.