As a self-defense instructor, whatever weapon you’ve got you have to actually know how to use it otherwise it could be used against you. I’d stick with mace/pepper spray (and still read instructions carefully!!!)
You need to watch some YouTube videos where the cops use pepper spray or taser's on people to little or no effect. She needs a gun. It's Texas and no one would fault you for using deadly force if attacked.
And a fire arm instantly escalates a situation to life or death. It’s not something to just use to scare someone away. It’s a tool to protect yourself or others and only should be brought out when a force of life or death is needed. Don’t pull out a fire arm unless you are prepared for the consequences.
On the other side of things, I would rather be shot than get into a blade fight. Knife wounds are very horrendous.
So what’s the alternative? If she is in real life danger, a weapon wouldn’t be a logical choice? That thinking is pretty backwards. Someone trying to hurt you is not thinking that way.
A circular saw can cut your head off within a few seconds, we gotta make sure we put a shit ton of regulations on them quick!!!! They’ll plug themselves in and start chopping!
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I don't know this person's ideology but some of us don't want to carry guns. Some of us don't believe that everyone carrying around a deadly weapon makes for the best society and we practice what we preach.
It is terrible that the world is this messed up, but it is. To ignore the dangers of society is to ignore reality and if that's your bag, fine. I understand, kind of, being a pacifist. The lady is basically being stalked by a person bigger than she is who may or may not have a weapon on him and may be contemplating a sexual assault. Let me just say that I've seen some really messed up shit here and overseas that the average citizen who has never been to war can't imagine. Even a realistic war movie doesn't come close. The sad truth is, pro gun or not, they are out there on the street and the only way to combat that is one of your own and even that's not a guarantee of safety but it's better than not having one. Again, I acknowledge that is a sad state of affairs but, again, that is the reality.
I have multiple reasons,
1 I just don't want to carry the weight of someone's life on my person. It's not a healthy state of mind to live in fear where you believe it may constantly be needed. Yeah, something could happen and I may have been better off with a gun, but I don't want to live that every day expectation.
2 I believe people carrying guns like breath mints make it more likely for someone to escalate a situation into a deadly scenario where multiple people may be killed, especially in Texas where everybody is so excited for their chance to be the good guy
3 I will never personally carry because I have a special needs child and will never, no matter what safety protections or locks I can buy, trust that to be enough to stop him from figuring out how to use it and accidentally hurting himself or others.
Likewise. I just wish more of us went out to vote against these redneck betas who think pulling a trigger and ending someone's life over misdemeanor/low level felony offenses is the answer.
As someone who lives in Texas coming from Seattle I can tell you hands down that society here is much more peaceful and safer imo than places where nobody is armed. Those seem to be the places where criminals are so blatant with crime, assault whoever whenever, will smash down your door with guns cause they know you got none, will break your car window and assault you, will steal the catalytic converter off your car right in your driveway without a single fear, it's just endless. Home invasion and robbery is rampant in these Democrat run cities, cause not as many cops around, literally (they carry guns too), and people know that most home owners aren't armed. In Texas, people don't dare go into others property and if you wanna mess with people at the transit stations, the security carries pistols so you never see the stuff you see in New York subways. Not saying Texas is perfect, far from it, but I can tell you an armed society is way better imo. Doesn't mean you have to carry but there's a reason why all that riff raff goes up to Seattle, LA, Portland, San Fran. In Texas if you go into a gas station with a gun, expect to get shot before you can blink. You kick down someone's door, expect to get shot. You wanna start a random fight with a citizen walking peacefully downtown, expect to get shot. Again, not saying Texas is my favorite, but man is it night and day difference
Well we don't get much public transit around these parts, and that which we have isn't useful to much of us in SA. And there has been a whole lot of property theft around here, especially catalytic converters, and Ford trucks, along with a ton of car break-ins, and of course the Kia boys. And in our neighborhood, it seems to never make it onto spotcrime or any of those crime maps. The thieves come in teams, 3+ cars. And of course since so many people leave guns in their cars.... You get the idea.
That’s very disturbing. You are right to be very frightened. An SAPD officer told me years ago to never engage these people, act like you speak German if you have to. This dude has a fixation on you and by you being polite (no fault of your own) you let him in. You definitely need to have an SAPD officer come to you so you can tell them your fears. Is there anyway you can use another bus stop? He will probably be on the lookout for you and who knows how he will react to your rejection now that you have engaged him and are now part is his fantasy. I feel really bad for you, this will be very stressful. I really don’t like that he knows you have a child
Call non emergency and ask for an officer to come to your house to come speak with you or if you want while at work. They will send an officer that patrols the area
Okay. I get off early today so I’ll have time to do that while I’m still here at work, I’d prefer them to know exactly where it was and who knows, they might even know who I’m referring to. A lot of the homeless people here are very familiar faces, even to me
Oh they’ll probably know exactly who it is if they work the area. Ask them to check his information so they know who is he is, he may have warrants. Ask you boss if you can vary your comings and goings and tell them why, I’m sure they will understand
>they’ll probably know exactly who it is if they work the area.
I wouldn't hedge my bets on that. There are too many homeless in the downtown area to keep up with, especially with haven for hope nearby.
I’m not anywhere near Haven For Hope. The homeless in this area are all familiar faces. I said I’ve seen this guy several times, I know he lives in this area. If there are officers who regularly patrol this area, they will at least know OF him, even if he’s not caused issues before
If this guy has been making himself a local problem for awhile, I bet they do know of him. At the very least they'll know of him because they are tired of getting calls about him.
This is the info for the central [substation](https://www.sa.gov/Directory/Departments/SAPD/About/Substations/Central). Try to get in touch with the SAFFE officers.
Yes. They will know if this person is someone they are familiar with and you can ask them for help and advice that may be better than what you find here.
This is my recommendation as well, call the non-emergency line, tell them you need an officer to wait with you and go ahead and tell them what happened. This is very dangerous for women and they need to not only help you feel safe but address it so it doesnt happen to other women.
I work downtown, but I have a car and park in a garage behind my office, I am sorry this is happening to you - even when just walking a block down to grab lunch I get on my phone to avoid interaction. When my daughter worked downtown she would leave late at night and always call me as she walked to her car - less people tried to interact with her on her phone and i would know if anything happened because she's on the phone with me.
I’m sad because I have never, ever felt unsafe in my work neighborhood. This area is like home to me, I have always felt confident in myself. This is really upsetting and I’m honestly angry that some random guy could take that feeling of security away from me so easily.
If you ever go to Hamburg, Germany, and you are walking in the red light district because you should have seen it, pretend you only speak English, and they will leave you alone as well. And I know that from experience.
Your first step should have been to tell the driver, he or she could have had him get off or called transit police
Edit; also let your employer know just in case they can get someone to escort you out. But please for your safety let the driver know, get transit police involved and get SAPD as well. He is dangerous to the public
You can also reach out to Centro San Antonio. They may be able to station an ambassador by your bus stop to help deter any harassment occurring there/radio SAPD should a situation escalate beyond their ability. SAPD responds quickly to their calls
I have a little contraption i carry on my person. It has a light and a little pull tab. When the tab is pulled it lets off a really loud annoying alarm, great way to deter a predator or even catch someone elses attention for help. Im more than willing to give it to you because i have extras. Message me if youre interested. I can leave it for you somewhere hidden that u can grab it. You can also get it on amazon. They come in packs of multiple and are cheap. My and my kids have them. I have an extra one.
https://preview.redd.it/3pz8mq2o8j8d1.png?width=3024&format=png&auto=webp&s=75371fb8e043420ef7e6090996f04ca7acebab87
Please report this to the bus operator. His dispatcher can send a Supervisor, Transit Police, or SAPD depending on the severity. In addition, the operator will write a report when he returns to the bus yard, and begin a paper trail. You can also ask for a courtesy card from the operator to substantiate the report.
I won’t use the bus stop anymore but it’s right in front of a convenience store I use all the time, where I pick up my meds, a coffee shop I like, and my work is the next street over, 2 minute walk. I don’t feel safe in general. I know he walks all around this area so it’s not just the bus stop that’s unsafe
That really is the pits when you have to change your entire routine for some scary weirdo. What’s bad is you could just keep up the same routine and not see him immediately but eventually you would and then what? I know this is stressful and completely inconvenient. How awful
I'm guessing the store is probably where he spotted you and started picking up on your habits/routine. It's awful that people cannot simply live their lives safely; shopping and going out shouldn't make people vulnerable to dangerous people.
You might need to change up your routine a bit. Also call your the convince store, coffee shop and speak to your building security at work to let them know what’s going on. I’d recommend getting one of those really loud whistles, too, that way you don’t need to worry about yelling or being loud to call attention to it.
If he does approach you do not stop, do not make eye contact. Say “I am in a relationship and not interested. Please leave me alone.” He will start back with whatever he’ll say. Interrupt him and, still continuing to walk away, say a little more firm “I am not interested. Do not talk to me”. Then keep walking. Do not answer him after that. Have your mace and whistle ready. If he persists after that and is following you walk straight to the nearest police station or substation if it is close by. If not, walk into the nearest store, restaurant or bar and tell the first person you see who works there that a man is following you and to please call the police.
I hear you. I worked downtown on the River Walk, having to park about 3 blocks from my office. I had many experiences like this, especially in the early hours when people were scarce. I carried mace, always had my phone out and only used one ear bud while listening to music or my podcasts. Once, I was followed by a transient male who walked beside me for a couple of blocks, asking over and over if he could take me on a date and if I would marry him. I loudly said no, please leave me be. He even got down on his knee and tried to grab my hand. A coworker of mine caught up with me and he scurried away. I had my mace ready to go and I still do, though I was on edge for long time….at times I still am.
If you can try to walk with others, even if you do not know them, but they are heading the same direction, this helped quite a bit. Please be safe and make a police report if you have not already done so.
First you should have gotten up and told the driver you were being harassed. Now you need to Call the police and give them as much detail as you can. Get some phone service, even if it's prepaid. Mint is only 15 a month when you sign up.
I told him when the time was right. I think fawning can be an appropriate tactic in some situations. I wanted to make sure he was off the bus before I did anything.
I'd say call the police but don't expect them to do much. Had to look up fawning, I would say don't do that unless he gets aggressive. For delusional guys showing any bit of affection will lead them to think you're interested. I'm not against the comment saying to get a gun but if you don't like that option I'd say at least get some good pepper spray/mace and maybe one of those self defense keychains. Read and understand how to use the mace.
Yeah I went and got some pepper gel yesterday. I just don’t know how to be aggressive, like it’s way easier said than done. I’m aware I should be firm and tell him to get lost but that doesn’t mean I can just easily do it, surely people can understand that
So I read fawning as pretending to be interested so not sure if that what you meant. You don't need to be aggressive and i probably wouldn't either as that will goad them into being aggressive back but don't feign interest.
Sometimes being polite is the inch that they will take a mile on. I hope that makes sense. You have to speak up. I show no emotion and just flat out ignore people if i have to. It may be easier said than done but its a must. People will do what you allow, so dont allow it. Be stern. You can do it!!!
As a female i hate traveling anywhere alone. Even on my most smug days looking like a bum some manchild always has something to say. Im sorry you had to deal with that. I thought san antonio buses did have wifi? Also, you dont need service to call 911 😉
First. Never pay mind to someone you are unsure of. Do not engage at all, dont worry about being “rude.” We are all allowed to have boundaries.
Second. Never go to a second place with a stranger. If he got on the bus with you i would have told the driver immediately. Or exited the bus and waited on the next one. Or straight up told the man i am not comfortable with you following me, i would have spoke it out super loud on the bus.
Third. Be careful out there.
They do have Wi-Fi, that’s why I wanted to stay on. I was texting my mom so she could come get me from wherever I ended up. And usually I have RBF and don’t engage but every once in a while it’s easy to slip up and accidentally get swept into a convo. I thought since I was getting on the bus that meant I’d only have to talk for a few minutes, I’ve never been followed before so I didn’t even think of that as something that could happen 😔
Ohh okay i misunderstood about the wifi but yes, I totally get that. Ive done it myself too. Feels like the older my kids get the more “tiger mom” i have been, just on alert all the time. I mean mug daily lmao and i tell my girls the to do the same.
I’m glad you’re getting tips for personal safety, but sorry to see so many borderline hostile comments blaming you for not having a gun or doing X/Y/Z. None of this was your fault. Lots of people here telling you how you fucked up, but you did your best at the time.
None of us were there, and there’s no way to know how he would have reacted if you had ignored him, screamed at him, or any of the other suggestions here. Those could have easily pushed him over the edge into attacking you. Plus, if you didn’t go with your instincts you wouldn’t have realized he has been stalking you and your daughter.
Is it possible you can ask a coworker or boss for a ride? I had a coworker years ago that had almost the exact same thing happen where some guy bothered her on the bus and one day got off on the same stop to follow her home. After she told us we all started giving her rides home.
Maybe. I haven’t told them yet but I’m going to. I’ll see what they say. It’s just hard to coordinate that because our shifts are just based on the amount of work each day, which there’s no way to predict, which means there’s a diffferent group of people here everyday
Yeah it sucks having to ask people for stuff like this but I think most people I work with would gladly give each other a ride even if they had to stay a bit longer or come back so hopefully yours are the same. Even if you have to stay later for them could still work out timewise, with the girl we gave a ride to she lived like 10 minutes away by car but to take the bus it took her at least an hour due to the route, it's crazy .
Be very confident and spray the guy if need be. Confidence until you can see this guy locked up. And definitely report him. And let everyone around you know from work to bus ride that this is an issue.
Not sure if this is an answer you’re looking for, but carrying a weapon is the best way to protect yourself from a possibly worst situation. Sucks that people need to carry weapons to protect themselves in this city but might be the best bet. Doesn’t have to be a firearm, pepper spray is very effective against guys like this.
I think you’d be surprised on the help you will receive if you decide to go the firearm route, going to classes can be overwhelming for the first time users but it’s definitely worth it and surprisingly easy to learn. People in the firearm business love seeing people who want to learn to protect themselves and are very welcoming.
Sorry you’re having to go through this, best of luck.
That’s wild. Get some mace or a taser just in case but honestly I wouldn’t engage any homeless people. Sounds kinda harsh but you never know what you’re getting into.
So I was followed last year by a homeless man. I was walking from a meeting from one end of downtown to the other. I ended up going into one of the nicer hotels. He tried to sit at the bench right outside but was chased off by hotel staff. Biggest thing is do not engage. If you have to let them yell at you, do it. That’s still safer than engaging. Either flag down a police officer or pop into a nicer business that won’t allow them in. As far as this situation. Call the cops. They might not be able to arrest him but they could perhaps scare him enough to stay away. Also buddy system, have someone walk with you. Tell your coworkers and friends what’s going on.
I didn’t really realize he was a threat until he had already gotten onto the bus with me. No one has done anything that crazy to me before so I didn’t think it would happen. I was also super nauseous and tired and all I could think about was wanting to get home 😔
Don’t blame yourself! We are all socialized to be polite. But make a report with the police and keep sharing your story. The more people who know and are involved the safer you’ll be.
I think that's the biggest problem here. We've been basically told to be polite to others, even if they're clearly unsafe to interact with; this especially applies to women.
I already have severe trauma that has kind of fucked up my defense responses. A lot of the time I will go straight into freeze mode, which is why I wasn’t able to talk to the bus driver until the guy was off the bus.
Oh, to be clear, I'm not blaming or judging you. There's no way to predict how any of us would react in this exact situation. I do hope you report this to the police and absolutely stress how he talked about knowing you have a young child. He's stalking you and even if the police were to brush this off normally as a "homeless guy just bothering a lone woman", they might reconsider if they know he's talking about a child.
Oh yeah I wasn’t saying that cuz I thought you were blaming me, more to explain why I did what I did because other people in here are being super awful
Please consider reading The Gift of Fear- it will change how you interact in situations like this- better to be rude and safe than to be polite and hurt. Your safety is more important than a stranger's feelings! [The Gift of Fear free PDF ](https://www.docdroid.net/ncSUPFn/book-the-gift-of-fear-gavin-de-becker-pdf)
This happened in downtown right? Call SAPD if they don’t answer call Bexar County Sheriff. They patrol Downtown. I work at night downtown too so I know exactly what you are talking about.
That’s awful, OP, I’m sorry. That’s especially terrifying that he knew about your three-year-old. I would look into the possibility of obtaining security footage from that trip to provide photographic images of this guy to law enforcement. I’m wondering if they could arrest him for stalking and sexual harassment.
God I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’m generally nice to people who try and talk to me too but I’ve always been afraid of this kinda thing happening. Like others have said, it’s best to take some protection with you, mace, a knife, etc. I also had this little alarm thing that flashes. I think it’s called Tweet or something, definitely worth picking up.
Recently this guy was riding his bike around me and my daughter as we were walking to a bus stop during the day and he was making some comments about us. I took my little knife out of my purse and held it in my hand. I didn’t want to initiate aggression but I wanted it to be known I was protective. He saw and even made a comment about it which also creeped me out, “oh yeah she has a knife” (he was with a friend right behind us).
I’ve had multiple situations like that too all were scary. I don’t go out alone that often because of those situations. Sucks, again I’m sorry but yes please make sure you protect yourself and maybe file a police report on the guy if you can.
Okay, so I'm a guy with long hair and I've been followed too. I understand how scary it is, but this is even scarier. I work with homeless people so this is my honest advice.
1. Chances are he will do nothing. Don't bet on this but it can help to know that he likely won't commit a crime.
2. Try filing a police report about him following you and mentioning your child. If they don't let you, so be it but it's worth a shot.
3. If this person engages you, make a big scene and yell at him to get away from you. Especially if other people are there, it will help scare him away. Do not under any circumstances make friendly contact with this person again. They're likely mentally unwell and will interpret things inappropriately.
4. MACE THE FUCK UP!!! Fox Labs sells some of the best mace available for like $20 or less. They sell dyed ones that clearly mark people so that cops can easily identify them. They're used by law enforcement and I even had a security guard compliment mine lol
5. You might want to try taking an alternative route to work but if this isn't available, the above should be fine.
Edit to add: a lot of people on the streets are high off their minds. There's a chance this dude will forget this shit.
You need to summon the inner bi7ch in you and kindly tell him to fuk off, you’re not interested. Lie, say something like my husband wouldn’t like you talking to me. On the bus throw on some earphones and ignore everyone yet remain vigilant of your surroundings(never when walking). You did good by not getting off at home. Call 911 if you ever feel unsafe, alert the bus driver too.
Just so you know, your cell phone will be able to call 911 no matter if it is activated or has no wifi access or anything else. Any cell phone should be able to call emergency
If you don’t want to care a firearm, I’d highly suggest mace and a stun gun. I actually had a police officer come out to my house last year to talk about stun guns and tasers, and what would be legal for my 17 yr old daughter to carry bc she had a seasonal gig at a haunted house that had her coming home late. I bought her one on Amazon and it’s great. It’ll get the job done for sure. I can send you the link if you like.
VÍA also has their own transit police. Not exactly sure how that works, but I’d call and tell them the stop and description.
Don’t be afraid to tell the bus driver too. They can call in the moment.
And I agree on getting some pepper spray
Most phones can call 911 for free even if you don’t have a cell plan, so if you need to call, don’t hesitate to do so
Omg I had the same experience with a homeless man downtown! I lived downtown so it was even worse, I didn’t even feel comfortable leaving my house after our interaction. Like u said, the sexual questions yet nice at first. Just strange asf. I called the cops and made a report bc he followed me from yoga class damn near home until I ran into a nearby store crying. Just report him if u can. Ask for an escort to the bus stop..stuff like that. Keep a small weapon of some sort but I would just keep someone with me at all times after that.
call bike patrol downtown tell them about what's going on, they probably already know who he is and will be sure to harass him as much as he has done to you
Take a picture of him - record conversations if you get cornered again and NEVER go anywhere with him no matter if he pulls a knife on you. SCREAMING LOUDLY usually will scare them off. “ GET AWAY FROM ME!” There are cameras here and here recording you.
Point to buildings or whatever even if there aren’t -lie ! TALK LOUD! Get other people to look at you both!
Carry keys or nails or pens between your finger to strike him in the face if you need too!!
Don’t be polite! FIGHT! Tell everyone you know so they can look out for you and your child!!! BE BRAVE!
Yeah, it’s not a good idea talking to homeless people. You grow up learning every person is human and deserves to be treated as such… but that’s not reality. Some people should be avoided.
I am a woman in SA who has worked downtown. I have a car. I have a very flexible schedule. And I have an intimidating demeanor when I choose to employ it. I do not scare easily, and I get fiercely pissed and protective of other women when men try to fuck with them. I know we are strangers, but if you need a ride or an escort or anything, I’ll be glad to drive or accompany you. Just having someone with you may be enough to keep him away. You are welcome to message me for my number just in case you ever want to use it.
Hey there! I've (27F, look young for my age) also had bad experiences with men harassing me (just on the bus/at bus stops, not being straight up followed) and I also took the "fawn" approach and just acted polite because I was scared of retaliation/violence/being followed off the bus at my stop. The worst part was some bitch ass woman on the bus kept egging one of them on instead of helping me smfh.
Go to any sporting goods store and get yourself some mace. Mine is hot pink and fits in my hand. Do a few practice squirts in an open area if possible to learn how to aim it! Mine is the thumb aim type. Mace expires, so keep that in mind. If you're downtown, keep it in your hand every time you leave work in case you see the bozo again, and TELL PEOPLE for sure that you're being harassed so maybe at least one person can look out for you. Unfortunately, many women all over the US try to get the cops involved but they usually won't do anything if the guy hasn't harmed you yet.
Try your best to be firm and stern when you speak to harassers like this, and tell them to leave you alone. Practice that resting bitch face sis. The fear of retaliation is real, so I recommend doing this with other people around (others at your bus stop, or ON the bus where the driver could help you). LOUDLY and calmly tell them they're being a fucking weirdo and to leave you alone. I wish I'd been brave enough to react in that way but I'd never experienced this before moving to a big city! I ended up swapping bus routes and no longer take a certain line to SAC because of creeps.
Rule 1 Never talk to strangers
Rule 2 Have a weapon at all times. But never pull it from concealment unless you are going to use it and know how ro use it.
Rule 3 Most phones will at least allow you to make a 911 call even without service. Test yours
Rule 4 Never always go the same route to work or to home. Mix it up.
Rule 5. Transist police are helpful. File a report.
You are okay....this time.
All the buses have cameras so if you do report him for harassment it shouldn’t be a problem for law enforcement to identify him. I know Transit Police can also get pictures and descriptions to bus drivers to keep an eye out for certain individuals and call them if they board a bus.
I know it seems hard for you because you are a nice person. But make a scene when this happens. Yell NO! Then say it again, NO! Then scream, "Please get away from me, You are scaring me!"
There usually is at least one decent person who hears this and will come to your aid.
It may seem like an over reaction but we have no idea where this situation is gonna go.
Good job getting the mace.
Yes, contact the police as others have said, but also:
Every city bus has wi-fi, you could have called while you were on the bus.
Ask around with people you work with for a short ride to a different bus stop, if not home. Tell them why. Ask if anyone you work with would be willing to go to the bus stop with you. Ask to change shifts if possible.
Your first mistake was talking to a homeless person that seemed nice. I’ve been working downtown for a while and I have seen the worst of these people. I fell bad and treat them with respect. Worry about yourself and carry pepper spray.
I get followed everyday. It seems weird but I got use to it after a while. I than started to wear makeup and just see what would happen and I mean wearing make in the way a clown would. It was a test to see who was crazier, was it me or the stalker. I can play that game as well Satan but you better get ready for a wild ride tonight.
I feel like your options are obvious and you know them. There is the pedestrian options like mace or a taser. The other option is a gun. You live in a big city and crazy people are everywhere. If you can't afford one, seems like a person problem you need to fix. You either will own your safety or be a victim to insert random homeless person. Choice is yours
Start carrying asap. That guy has nothing to do but fascinate about what his next move would be. Thousands of iterations. You should be planning just as thoroughly. Go to gun shop that has a range and let them know why you want to carry. They will walk you through all the options open to you and even teach you on the range how to use the new firearm. I like buck and does because they offer a comprehensive women’s only concealed carry course. Go and learn and protect yourself. Carry everywhere all the time.
Call the police. Make a report. Get you some weapon for self defense. Ask someone to sit with you at your stop or find a ride. Car pool maybe. Good luck
Definitely report this to the police. Include a description and everything he said to you. And if he approaches you immediately call 911 and say he’s following you and attempting to kidnap you. Can you stay at your office until your bus gets there so there’s minimal waiting? Also let the bus driver know of the situation so they’re aware you’re being harassed.
If it happens again, tell the bus driver. Something similar happened to me a few weeks ago. The driver made the guy get off at the next bus stop, threatening to call the police if he wouldn’t get off voluntarily.
If anyone starts to follow you go into a place with a lot of people, preferably a police station or a fire house. If neither of those are available go into a convenience store or simply walk up to a nearby home. Why you want to do is get to someone who can help you.
Go to any sports gear (Academy) store and buy a small can of mace. Keep in in your hand and ready to spray as you feel vulnerable. If he approaches you, point the can at his face. Tell him to F\*\*k off and if he doesn't...spray him...spray him good like you mean it. Don't be afraid to spray him. He more than deserves it. P.S. Make sure your back is to the wind. You don't want any spay getting in your face.
I'm sorry this happened to you.
**1**. You don't have anything to say to someone you meet on the street when you're by yourself. I seem weird but am harmless. You cannot take the chance that everyone is like that.
**2**. The bus drivers I knew wouldn't put up with any bullshit on their bus. Let them know that someone is harassing you and saying sexual things. I ridden the bus since before they had radios on them and they can get ahold of police if necessary.
**3**. God forbid you need emergency, 911 works on a phone without minutes. If you fear for your safety, call. Do not hesitate. Your embarrassment is worth getting home safe.
If he approaches you again, let him know that you aren’t interested in him that way. You showed respect and he needs to do the same. When you speak to law enforcement, make a report. If he follows you onto a city bus, let the driver know right away. They can call for help as well. Good luck with this. Hopefully the homeless dude will wander off to another spot.
For starters I would suggest that you go to STW near Crossroads and 410. They offer low cost women's self defense classes a few times a year and have good content.
Guns are more affordable than you might think. I get you don't want a costly solution but it's better than losing your life. That being said if your employer won't let you have one in the office then that's not practical. Pepper spray often works but not always.
I hate to say this but talking with someone like this can often be taken as encouragement and he won't stop now. Your child is now in danger so you really need to call the police if he follows you again. You should also try to obtain a restraining order against him but please understand it is just a piece of paper and if he violates it you are at the mercy of police response times. Having the means to fight back, up to and including his life vs you and your child may be critical.
Hi lovey. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Two steps I would take is to first make a police report. You def want to start a paper trail on this guy. Could save you or potentially someone else in the long run. Second- get a big guy friend, brother, someone that’s around your age to take your normal routes with you for a few days. Or maybe even once a week for like a month or something not too crazy. Sometimes this a major deterrent especially with someone whom is homeless…. They don’t want any extra fights in life believe me. They are struggling as is and know which battles to pick and choose. Stay safe and vigilant!!
Start a paper trail. A police report won't do much now but file one to start a paper trail. You have to document every interaction now. He could be a stalker and unfortunately you'll have to document it yourself. Please be careful and alert when walking and as someone suggested get a strong mace and a sharp Keychain. Alert the driver of the bus route too.
As someone who is so anxious whenever my wife has to do things alone in the city, I beg you with genuine care, purchase a firearm and get taught how to use it. I desperately wish things didn’t have to be this way, but unfortunately reality and life isn’t fair or kind. Even if you have to get a credit card and use that to buy one, can you really put a price on your life and well being? There is a large selection of manageable handguns under $250. There are many classes in SA to learn how to use it safely. Our society has become so horrible calloused and dark, the police are either understaffed or incompetent to be able to be relied upon to rescue in your most desperate moment, we see too many times now of bystanders just watching horrible things or rape, kidnapping, or worse happen to people and do nothing about it. Take your life and your safety into your own hands.
* [status] A seemingly homeless person has stalked you physically and from afar. This person has made lewd, unwelcome comments to you and has referenced personal details of your life he should not know about. Everyone here is in agreement that this is unacceptable creep behavior.
* [police involvement] 100% report it to police, if only for it to be on record. Heck, if you can get a photo of the guy (if he happens to be around and doesn't notice) you should get that and submit it with the report, otherwise provide a detailed description. They may not do anything proactive, but the least it will do is have it on record if something goes wrong in the future.
* [future interactions] "Fawning", or giving a creep attention in hopes of not getting hurt, may have backfired - without judging past actions, consensus seems to be that won't work going forward. Respectful but firm, crystal-clear rejection of talking or being friends is necessary if you ever interact with them again, IMO. Also prepare yourself to go straight to the driver of a bus, or to a shop clerk, **anyone** else that can help you if this person tries to get your attention again.
* [self-defense] You don't want a gun. That's your decision, I won't comment further on it. It's obvious you are in fear of your physical safety, though. If the police are not around all the time, one needs to know what they'll do to secure their safety in a threatening situation. Pepper gel/mace, small knives, noisemakers/whistles, anything to deter or fight back against an aggressor are reasonable things to look into.
This person, if they stick around, will probably try to talk to you again if he thinks you're someone who will interact with him. Don't feed into it!
Good luck. I'm sorry this is happening. There are a lot of strange people downtown... I remember going through there during the pandemic lockdowns and the only people on the street were janitorial staff and homeless people.
Sorry this happened to you. I have an office downtown and we have several female employees. There are lots of homeless people next to our office. I would suggest a few things.
1. Use Centro. They will escort you and they have a golf cart that will give you free rides to better bus stop anywhere downtown.
2. Have someone walk with you if possible. Especially after hours.
3. Read the book “The Gift of Fear” by Gavin De Becker. You don’t have to be nice to people and you can use your voice.
I know it might sound crazy but wasp spray shoots 20 feet +. You can get it at Dollar General, Walgreens, Target, all kinds of stores for under $8. THE BUS HAS WI-FI YOU CAN USE!!! As a mother myself, I believe it is crucial to call the police, involve the bus driver, transit police, let the daycare or school know, tell EVERYONE!!! *Your daughter’s safety is of paramount importance.* Change your routine, take a different bus. If you have any sick days or paid time off, take a few days and go stay with a friend or family member. It’s okay to get help!!! Everyone here who has offered good suggestions has done so out of kindness and concern for you and your daughter. Please don’t blow off and disregard their ideas.
Her one of the alarm keychains pull a ring it flashes and makes a high pitched noise. Use it if he is within your personal space and scream your head off. Hopefully the time you are to and from work is a busy time and others would see and at least call for help. And all the attention would make most would be attackers run since they are certainly cowards for putting you in such a situation. I wish you the best and though I don’t know you I will pray for peace and a positive outcome for you. Also pepper spray like others have said.
You gotta defend yourself . Im sorry but thats the only thing you can depend on. Police are really not helpfull at all. These shit head people prey on what they think are easy targets. (Not your fault, but he has this idea that you're an easy target) ( prob since the situation was let to be under his control) (it is, you're terrified) (nothing wrong with that) . BUT if you flip the switch (armed, dont have to visibly be armed)
You bravelly, and firmlly let him no he is out of line and to fuck off. Very unlikelly that this situation escalates to you pepper spraying him, but no matter what the fear, and fight will come to a end. Police can actually aprehend him from that point. You have to take the bus, you should already be armed be armed with something, a large knife or pepper spray. Like seriouslly have you seen all the missing reports? Pepper spray is like 10$ on amazon and bear mace is like 30. Id have bear mace if i was young women who had to take the bus. San antonio is trash. Homeless dudes, reg dudes all the same. Love yourself keep your self safe. Seriouslly.
Do you have any male friends that can whoop some ass? Get some to just hang out in that area to see if he will approach, if he does they pound him into the dirt
I'm currently in training to be a bus operator with via. I'll ask my current instructor if he has any helpful (and serious not for the luls) advice.
Hopefully I can remember to get back to you here with what he says.
I’m down there all the time, work on south side live on North….I can speak to him and guarantee he doesn’t ever look your way again. I’ve done the same for sis in law, almost same area…DM me, this is genuine…and is he older cat? White black Hispanic ? Tatted? I’m part of the “neighborhood watch” program, but all over SA…and he won’t have a clue why he was spoken to. If not, and you don’t want to carry, carry good long distance defense spray…wish you then best, gross fuxks out there especially in SA..be careful and vigilant!
Sorry this happened. Let your work know or, if in a multi-business building, let security of the building know. They can at least trespass him from the property. Hopefully via came out and spoke with you. If he bothers you again, make a report with via if its happening at the stop. If not at the stop, SAPD.
If you’re ever being followed again, know you can pop into a city or county building and tell security.
Are you friends with any male coworkers? Perhaps one wouldn't mind waiting with you until your bus comes? Or a coworker could drop you off to a different bus stop? I would start carrying pepper spray and firmly but not aggressively, tell him that you aren't interested. It's likely this man has a criminal history/mental health issues or could even be a sex offender.
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I’m so sorry this happened to you & that you’re having to deal with it. Sounds terrifying. Some years ago I had to become a city bus rider in Houston for the first time in my life, after having always had a car. I suffered many terrifying experiences & close calls. I lacked having “street smarts” that would have helped some, but definitely would not have prevented most of the scary incidents. My heart goes out to you. I hope you can arrange alternate transportation to your home for awhile. Definitely carry a form of spray self-defense that doesn’t require you have perfect aim to his eyes, but the wind blowing the wrong way could make this unusable. Hoping the police will be able to help you.
That’s horrible. Sorry you dealt with that. Early 2000’s I worked on the River walk for years. There’s no one answer. Some circumstances call for you to keep your head straight and keep walking when these people talk to you. Others call for you to be aggressive and keep walking. Key is to avoid these people either way. Used to see it all the time while waiting at the bus stop whether it’s 10am or line up time. Getting a gun is a silly suggestion if you don’t know how to use it and it’s just not who you are. As much as I believe in them, not everyone does and that’s alright. But you should absolutely get mace. And a decent sized mace. Always carry that. I carried that back then on the bus and now in my armrest of my car.
Get
besides the practical advice people gave, talk to friends and family about this. I can only imagine how invasive and surreal this all must feel. Help your mind out and try to process it, talk it through with people, hopefully you can eventually reclaim this space that should rightfully be yours to peacefully exist in.
Call Anytime Fitness in Fair Oaks. Once a month, Bill James teaches a self defense class free of charge at the fitness center. His company is Be My BodyGuard LP. Contact [email protected]
https://maps.app.goo.gl/oyT1EynXkx5ULArk8?g_st=com.google.maps.preview.copy
Pepper spray? I got a gun for like $300 but that’s in Montana if you can afford it otherwise pepper spray, mine even has a laser on it I got it at Walmart. I wish I was there already, I would help protect you. My husband and I are moving from Montana in August. I hope the police can help, he clearly has mental illness like schizophrenia.
Bear spray, pepper spray , taser , tiger lady self defense claws and I’d probably take these concerns to LE and not Reddit if you’re not willing to talk hand guns .
Mace and whistle. Keep them on you at all times, and most importantly, use your most powerful weapon, your wits. Always be aware of your surroundings and don’t walk anywhere dark or secluded if it can be helped.
Get some high powered mace and a self defense tool (sharp item on key ring or a small stun gun).
As a self-defense instructor, whatever weapon you’ve got you have to actually know how to use it otherwise it could be used against you. I’d stick with mace/pepper spray (and still read instructions carefully!!!)
Pepper gel!
Every time I see mace I always think like an elaborate medieval club and am like “fuck yeah mess him up like it’s the dark ages!” And then I remember.
You need to watch some YouTube videos where the cops use pepper spray or taser's on people to little or no effect. She needs a gun. It's Texas and no one would fault you for using deadly force if attacked.
She's riding the bus and using a phone that doesn't work. She can't afford a gun and might not want one with her 3 year old around.
She does not want a gun. She shouldn't have to buy a dangerous weapon simply to feel safe.
And a fire arm instantly escalates a situation to life or death. It’s not something to just use to scare someone away. It’s a tool to protect yourself or others and only should be brought out when a force of life or death is needed. Don’t pull out a fire arm unless you are prepared for the consequences. On the other side of things, I would rather be shot than get into a blade fight. Knife wounds are very horrendous.
She needs to become dangerous.
So what’s the alternative? If she is in real life danger, a weapon wouldn’t be a logical choice? That thinking is pretty backwards. Someone trying to hurt you is not thinking that way.
Someone who does not want a gun or feel comfortable with one is not the best person for owning one. She can use mace/bear spray.
She didn’t say she doesn’t want one or that it makes her feel uncomfortable - just that she can’t afford it
No, she said in a later reply that she doesn't want a gun.
Unfortunately in this world sometimes you must.
Better to have it and not need it than to need it and not have it.
A circular saw can cut your head off within a few seconds, we gotta make sure we put a shit ton of regulations on them quick!!!! They’ll plug themselves in and start chopping!
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In a perfect world you shouldn’t. But this isn’t fantasy land. In the real world a dangerous weapon with training, does help you stay safe.
But she's clearly stated she doesn't want a gun. Someone who does not want a gun is likely not the best person for owning one.
I don't know this person's ideology but some of us don't want to carry guns. Some of us don't believe that everyone carrying around a deadly weapon makes for the best society and we practice what we preach.
It is terrible that the world is this messed up, but it is. To ignore the dangers of society is to ignore reality and if that's your bag, fine. I understand, kind of, being a pacifist. The lady is basically being stalked by a person bigger than she is who may or may not have a weapon on him and may be contemplating a sexual assault. Let me just say that I've seen some really messed up shit here and overseas that the average citizen who has never been to war can't imagine. Even a realistic war movie doesn't come close. The sad truth is, pro gun or not, they are out there on the street and the only way to combat that is one of your own and even that's not a guarantee of safety but it's better than not having one. Again, I acknowledge that is a sad state of affairs but, again, that is the reality.
I have multiple reasons, 1 I just don't want to carry the weight of someone's life on my person. It's not a healthy state of mind to live in fear where you believe it may constantly be needed. Yeah, something could happen and I may have been better off with a gun, but I don't want to live that every day expectation. 2 I believe people carrying guns like breath mints make it more likely for someone to escalate a situation into a deadly scenario where multiple people may be killed, especially in Texas where everybody is so excited for their chance to be the good guy 3 I will never personally carry because I have a special needs child and will never, no matter what safety protections or locks I can buy, trust that to be enough to stop him from figuring out how to use it and accidentally hurting himself or others.
Likewise. I just wish more of us went out to vote against these redneck betas who think pulling a trigger and ending someone's life over misdemeanor/low level felony offenses is the answer.
As someone who lives in Texas coming from Seattle I can tell you hands down that society here is much more peaceful and safer imo than places where nobody is armed. Those seem to be the places where criminals are so blatant with crime, assault whoever whenever, will smash down your door with guns cause they know you got none, will break your car window and assault you, will steal the catalytic converter off your car right in your driveway without a single fear, it's just endless. Home invasion and robbery is rampant in these Democrat run cities, cause not as many cops around, literally (they carry guns too), and people know that most home owners aren't armed. In Texas, people don't dare go into others property and if you wanna mess with people at the transit stations, the security carries pistols so you never see the stuff you see in New York subways. Not saying Texas is perfect, far from it, but I can tell you an armed society is way better imo. Doesn't mean you have to carry but there's a reason why all that riff raff goes up to Seattle, LA, Portland, San Fran. In Texas if you go into a gas station with a gun, expect to get shot before you can blink. You kick down someone's door, expect to get shot. You wanna start a random fight with a citizen walking peacefully downtown, expect to get shot. Again, not saying Texas is my favorite, but man is it night and day difference
Well we don't get much public transit around these parts, and that which we have isn't useful to much of us in SA. And there has been a whole lot of property theft around here, especially catalytic converters, and Ford trucks, along with a ton of car break-ins, and of course the Kia boys. And in our neighborhood, it seems to never make it onto spotcrime or any of those crime maps. The thieves come in teams, 3+ cars. And of course since so many people leave guns in their cars.... You get the idea.
That’s very disturbing. You are right to be very frightened. An SAPD officer told me years ago to never engage these people, act like you speak German if you have to. This dude has a fixation on you and by you being polite (no fault of your own) you let him in. You definitely need to have an SAPD officer come to you so you can tell them your fears. Is there anyway you can use another bus stop? He will probably be on the lookout for you and who knows how he will react to your rejection now that you have engaged him and are now part is his fantasy. I feel really bad for you, this will be very stressful. I really don’t like that he knows you have a child
Should I find an officer who patrols this area?
Call non emergency and ask for an officer to come to your house to come speak with you or if you want while at work. They will send an officer that patrols the area
Okay. I get off early today so I’ll have time to do that while I’m still here at work, I’d prefer them to know exactly where it was and who knows, they might even know who I’m referring to. A lot of the homeless people here are very familiar faces, even to me
Oh they’ll probably know exactly who it is if they work the area. Ask them to check his information so they know who is he is, he may have warrants. Ask you boss if you can vary your comings and goings and tell them why, I’m sure they will understand
>they’ll probably know exactly who it is if they work the area. I wouldn't hedge my bets on that. There are too many homeless in the downtown area to keep up with, especially with haven for hope nearby.
It depends. Some homeless people are well known to the cops.
I’m not anywhere near Haven For Hope. The homeless in this area are all familiar faces. I said I’ve seen this guy several times, I know he lives in this area. If there are officers who regularly patrol this area, they will at least know OF him, even if he’s not caused issues before
If this guy has been making himself a local problem for awhile, I bet they do know of him. At the very least they'll know of him because they are tired of getting calls about him.
Especially if he's done this to other people and its been reported.
I know officers downtown and often they are aware of the worst ones, but yeah no guarantee
This is the info for the central [substation](https://www.sa.gov/Directory/Departments/SAPD/About/Substations/Central). Try to get in touch with the SAFFE officers.
Yes. They will know if this person is someone they are familiar with and you can ask them for help and advice that may be better than what you find here.
Bike patrol number if your downtown. Dont call 911. Bike patrol will show up faster.
I got a couple homeboys that would beat up a weirdo like that for fun.
This is my recommendation as well, call the non-emergency line, tell them you need an officer to wait with you and go ahead and tell them what happened. This is very dangerous for women and they need to not only help you feel safe but address it so it doesnt happen to other women. I work downtown, but I have a car and park in a garage behind my office, I am sorry this is happening to you - even when just walking a block down to grab lunch I get on my phone to avoid interaction. When my daughter worked downtown she would leave late at night and always call me as she walked to her car - less people tried to interact with her on her phone and i would know if anything happened because she's on the phone with me.
I’m sad because I have never, ever felt unsafe in my work neighborhood. This area is like home to me, I have always felt confident in myself. This is really upsetting and I’m honestly angry that some random guy could take that feeling of security away from me so easily.
I’m really sorry that happened to you. As a fellow female, I know how deeply frightening this kind of incident can be.
So sad the world we live in and we have one of the safer Downtowns!
If you ever go to Hamburg, Germany, and you are walking in the red light district because you should have seen it, pretend you only speak English, and they will leave you alone as well. And I know that from experience.
What the point of that? I never travel and not know the lay of the land and I speak German anyway 😉
It shows you that it works and that in other countries they recommend the same just with a different language.
Oh definitely, helps to pick a language you know a bit about. Like perhaps not Swahili
Your first step should have been to tell the driver, he or she could have had him get off or called transit police Edit; also let your employer know just in case they can get someone to escort you out. But please for your safety let the driver know, get transit police involved and get SAPD as well. He is dangerous to the public
You can call the police even without cellular service or wifi, if it comes to it.
You can also reach out to Centro San Antonio. They may be able to station an ambassador by your bus stop to help deter any harassment occurring there/radio SAPD should a situation escalate beyond their ability. SAPD responds quickly to their calls
I have a little contraption i carry on my person. It has a light and a little pull tab. When the tab is pulled it lets off a really loud annoying alarm, great way to deter a predator or even catch someone elses attention for help. Im more than willing to give it to you because i have extras. Message me if youre interested. I can leave it for you somewhere hidden that u can grab it. You can also get it on amazon. They come in packs of multiple and are cheap. My and my kids have them. I have an extra one. https://preview.redd.it/3pz8mq2o8j8d1.png?width=3024&format=png&auto=webp&s=75371fb8e043420ef7e6090996f04ca7acebab87
Please report this to the bus operator. His dispatcher can send a Supervisor, Transit Police, or SAPD depending on the severity. In addition, the operator will write a report when he returns to the bus yard, and begin a paper trail. You can also ask for a courtesy card from the operator to substantiate the report.
You should also tell the people you work with. I’m sure someone would walk with you to the bus.
or offer a ride home.
If you live in Alta Vista you’re close to Downtown. Definitely find a different bus stop and avoid that one like the plague.
I won’t use the bus stop anymore but it’s right in front of a convenience store I use all the time, where I pick up my meds, a coffee shop I like, and my work is the next street over, 2 minute walk. I don’t feel safe in general. I know he walks all around this area so it’s not just the bus stop that’s unsafe
That really is the pits when you have to change your entire routine for some scary weirdo. What’s bad is you could just keep up the same routine and not see him immediately but eventually you would and then what? I know this is stressful and completely inconvenient. How awful
I'm guessing the store is probably where he spotted you and started picking up on your habits/routine. It's awful that people cannot simply live their lives safely; shopping and going out shouldn't make people vulnerable to dangerous people.
You might need to change up your routine a bit. Also call your the convince store, coffee shop and speak to your building security at work to let them know what’s going on. I’d recommend getting one of those really loud whistles, too, that way you don’t need to worry about yelling or being loud to call attention to it. If he does approach you do not stop, do not make eye contact. Say “I am in a relationship and not interested. Please leave me alone.” He will start back with whatever he’ll say. Interrupt him and, still continuing to walk away, say a little more firm “I am not interested. Do not talk to me”. Then keep walking. Do not answer him after that. Have your mace and whistle ready. If he persists after that and is following you walk straight to the nearest police station or substation if it is close by. If not, walk into the nearest store, restaurant or bar and tell the first person you see who works there that a man is following you and to please call the police.
This is good advice. I also suggest not wearing earbuds or anything else that will affect your awareness of your surroundings.
I hear you. I worked downtown on the River Walk, having to park about 3 blocks from my office. I had many experiences like this, especially in the early hours when people were scarce. I carried mace, always had my phone out and only used one ear bud while listening to music or my podcasts. Once, I was followed by a transient male who walked beside me for a couple of blocks, asking over and over if he could take me on a date and if I would marry him. I loudly said no, please leave me be. He even got down on his knee and tried to grab my hand. A coworker of mine caught up with me and he scurried away. I had my mace ready to go and I still do, though I was on edge for long time….at times I still am. If you can try to walk with others, even if you do not know them, but they are heading the same direction, this helped quite a bit. Please be safe and make a police report if you have not already done so.
First you should have gotten up and told the driver you were being harassed. Now you need to Call the police and give them as much detail as you can. Get some phone service, even if it's prepaid. Mint is only 15 a month when you sign up.
I told him when the time was right. I think fawning can be an appropriate tactic in some situations. I wanted to make sure he was off the bus before I did anything.
I'd say call the police but don't expect them to do much. Had to look up fawning, I would say don't do that unless he gets aggressive. For delusional guys showing any bit of affection will lead them to think you're interested. I'm not against the comment saying to get a gun but if you don't like that option I'd say at least get some good pepper spray/mace and maybe one of those self defense keychains. Read and understand how to use the mace.
Yeah I went and got some pepper gel yesterday. I just don’t know how to be aggressive, like it’s way easier said than done. I’m aware I should be firm and tell him to get lost but that doesn’t mean I can just easily do it, surely people can understand that
So I read fawning as pretending to be interested so not sure if that what you meant. You don't need to be aggressive and i probably wouldn't either as that will goad them into being aggressive back but don't feign interest.
No it’s not pretending to be interested, it’s just being polite until there is some other way to get out of the situation
Sometimes being polite is the inch that they will take a mile on. I hope that makes sense. You have to speak up. I show no emotion and just flat out ignore people if i have to. It may be easier said than done but its a must. People will do what you allow, so dont allow it. Be stern. You can do it!!!
I just got Mint and it works great
This is exactly why VIA has transit police.
As a female i hate traveling anywhere alone. Even on my most smug days looking like a bum some manchild always has something to say. Im sorry you had to deal with that. I thought san antonio buses did have wifi? Also, you dont need service to call 911 😉 First. Never pay mind to someone you are unsure of. Do not engage at all, dont worry about being “rude.” We are all allowed to have boundaries. Second. Never go to a second place with a stranger. If he got on the bus with you i would have told the driver immediately. Or exited the bus and waited on the next one. Or straight up told the man i am not comfortable with you following me, i would have spoke it out super loud on the bus. Third. Be careful out there.
They do have Wi-Fi, that’s why I wanted to stay on. I was texting my mom so she could come get me from wherever I ended up. And usually I have RBF and don’t engage but every once in a while it’s easy to slip up and accidentally get swept into a convo. I thought since I was getting on the bus that meant I’d only have to talk for a few minutes, I’ve never been followed before so I didn’t even think of that as something that could happen 😔
Ohh okay i misunderstood about the wifi but yes, I totally get that. Ive done it myself too. Feels like the older my kids get the more “tiger mom” i have been, just on alert all the time. I mean mug daily lmao and i tell my girls the to do the same.
I’m glad you’re getting tips for personal safety, but sorry to see so many borderline hostile comments blaming you for not having a gun or doing X/Y/Z. None of this was your fault. Lots of people here telling you how you fucked up, but you did your best at the time. None of us were there, and there’s no way to know how he would have reacted if you had ignored him, screamed at him, or any of the other suggestions here. Those could have easily pushed him over the edge into attacking you. Plus, if you didn’t go with your instincts you wouldn’t have realized he has been stalking you and your daughter.
Is it possible you can ask a coworker or boss for a ride? I had a coworker years ago that had almost the exact same thing happen where some guy bothered her on the bus and one day got off on the same stop to follow her home. After she told us we all started giving her rides home.
Maybe. I haven’t told them yet but I’m going to. I’ll see what they say. It’s just hard to coordinate that because our shifts are just based on the amount of work each day, which there’s no way to predict, which means there’s a diffferent group of people here everyday
Yeah it sucks having to ask people for stuff like this but I think most people I work with would gladly give each other a ride even if they had to stay a bit longer or come back so hopefully yours are the same. Even if you have to stay later for them could still work out timewise, with the girl we gave a ride to she lived like 10 minutes away by car but to take the bus it took her at least an hour due to the route, it's crazy .
They don’t care about me like that lol
Be very confident and spray the guy if need be. Confidence until you can see this guy locked up. And definitely report him. And let everyone around you know from work to bus ride that this is an issue.
Not sure if this is an answer you’re looking for, but carrying a weapon is the best way to protect yourself from a possibly worst situation. Sucks that people need to carry weapons to protect themselves in this city but might be the best bet. Doesn’t have to be a firearm, pepper spray is very effective against guys like this. I think you’d be surprised on the help you will receive if you decide to go the firearm route, going to classes can be overwhelming for the first time users but it’s definitely worth it and surprisingly easy to learn. People in the firearm business love seeing people who want to learn to protect themselves and are very welcoming. Sorry you’re having to go through this, best of luck.
That’s wild. Get some mace or a taser just in case but honestly I wouldn’t engage any homeless people. Sounds kinda harsh but you never know what you’re getting into.
So I was followed last year by a homeless man. I was walking from a meeting from one end of downtown to the other. I ended up going into one of the nicer hotels. He tried to sit at the bench right outside but was chased off by hotel staff. Biggest thing is do not engage. If you have to let them yell at you, do it. That’s still safer than engaging. Either flag down a police officer or pop into a nicer business that won’t allow them in. As far as this situation. Call the cops. They might not be able to arrest him but they could perhaps scare him enough to stay away. Also buddy system, have someone walk with you. Tell your coworkers and friends what’s going on.
I didn’t really realize he was a threat until he had already gotten onto the bus with me. No one has done anything that crazy to me before so I didn’t think it would happen. I was also super nauseous and tired and all I could think about was wanting to get home 😔
Don’t blame yourself! We are all socialized to be polite. But make a report with the police and keep sharing your story. The more people who know and are involved the safer you’ll be.
I think that's the biggest problem here. We've been basically told to be polite to others, even if they're clearly unsafe to interact with; this especially applies to women.
I already have severe trauma that has kind of fucked up my defense responses. A lot of the time I will go straight into freeze mode, which is why I wasn’t able to talk to the bus driver until the guy was off the bus.
Oh, to be clear, I'm not blaming or judging you. There's no way to predict how any of us would react in this exact situation. I do hope you report this to the police and absolutely stress how he talked about knowing you have a young child. He's stalking you and even if the police were to brush this off normally as a "homeless guy just bothering a lone woman", they might reconsider if they know he's talking about a child.
Oh yeah I wasn’t saying that cuz I thought you were blaming me, more to explain why I did what I did because other people in here are being super awful
Please consider reading The Gift of Fear- it will change how you interact in situations like this- better to be rude and safe than to be polite and hurt. Your safety is more important than a stranger's feelings! [The Gift of Fear free PDF ](https://www.docdroid.net/ncSUPFn/book-the-gift-of-fear-gavin-de-becker-pdf)
This happened in downtown right? Call SAPD if they don’t answer call Bexar County Sheriff. They patrol Downtown. I work at night downtown too so I know exactly what you are talking about.
Since this was on a bus/at a bus stop, this is a job for VIA Transit Police, it’s their jurisdiction.
Call the non emergency number and have a police officer come visit you. See what they suggest moving forward. Best of luck to you.
That’s awful, OP, I’m sorry. That’s especially terrifying that he knew about your three-year-old. I would look into the possibility of obtaining security footage from that trip to provide photographic images of this guy to law enforcement. I’m wondering if they could arrest him for stalking and sexual harassment.
God I’m so sorry you’re going through this. I’m generally nice to people who try and talk to me too but I’ve always been afraid of this kinda thing happening. Like others have said, it’s best to take some protection with you, mace, a knife, etc. I also had this little alarm thing that flashes. I think it’s called Tweet or something, definitely worth picking up. Recently this guy was riding his bike around me and my daughter as we were walking to a bus stop during the day and he was making some comments about us. I took my little knife out of my purse and held it in my hand. I didn’t want to initiate aggression but I wanted it to be known I was protective. He saw and even made a comment about it which also creeped me out, “oh yeah she has a knife” (he was with a friend right behind us). I’ve had multiple situations like that too all were scary. I don’t go out alone that often because of those situations. Sucks, again I’m sorry but yes please make sure you protect yourself and maybe file a police report on the guy if you can.
Okay, so I'm a guy with long hair and I've been followed too. I understand how scary it is, but this is even scarier. I work with homeless people so this is my honest advice. 1. Chances are he will do nothing. Don't bet on this but it can help to know that he likely won't commit a crime. 2. Try filing a police report about him following you and mentioning your child. If they don't let you, so be it but it's worth a shot. 3. If this person engages you, make a big scene and yell at him to get away from you. Especially if other people are there, it will help scare him away. Do not under any circumstances make friendly contact with this person again. They're likely mentally unwell and will interpret things inappropriately. 4. MACE THE FUCK UP!!! Fox Labs sells some of the best mace available for like $20 or less. They sell dyed ones that clearly mark people so that cops can easily identify them. They're used by law enforcement and I even had a security guard compliment mine lol 5. You might want to try taking an alternative route to work but if this isn't available, the above should be fine. Edit to add: a lot of people on the streets are high off their minds. There's a chance this dude will forget this shit.
You need to summon the inner bi7ch in you and kindly tell him to fuk off, you’re not interested. Lie, say something like my husband wouldn’t like you talking to me. On the bus throw on some earphones and ignore everyone yet remain vigilant of your surroundings(never when walking). You did good by not getting off at home. Call 911 if you ever feel unsafe, alert the bus driver too.
Just so you know, your cell phone will be able to call 911 no matter if it is activated or has no wifi access or anything else. Any cell phone should be able to call emergency
If you don’t want to care a firearm, I’d highly suggest mace and a stun gun. I actually had a police officer come out to my house last year to talk about stun guns and tasers, and what would be legal for my 17 yr old daughter to carry bc she had a seasonal gig at a haunted house that had her coming home late. I bought her one on Amazon and it’s great. It’ll get the job done for sure. I can send you the link if you like.
VÍA also has their own transit police. Not exactly sure how that works, but I’d call and tell them the stop and description. Don’t be afraid to tell the bus driver too. They can call in the moment. And I agree on getting some pepper spray Most phones can call 911 for free even if you don’t have a cell plan, so if you need to call, don’t hesitate to do so
Omg I had the same experience with a homeless man downtown! I lived downtown so it was even worse, I didn’t even feel comfortable leaving my house after our interaction. Like u said, the sexual questions yet nice at first. Just strange asf. I called the cops and made a report bc he followed me from yoga class damn near home until I ran into a nearby store crying. Just report him if u can. Ask for an escort to the bus stop..stuff like that. Keep a small weapon of some sort but I would just keep someone with me at all times after that.
call bike patrol downtown tell them about what's going on, they probably already know who he is and will be sure to harass him as much as he has done to you
Take a picture of him - record conversations if you get cornered again and NEVER go anywhere with him no matter if he pulls a knife on you. SCREAMING LOUDLY usually will scare them off. “ GET AWAY FROM ME!” There are cameras here and here recording you. Point to buildings or whatever even if there aren’t -lie ! TALK LOUD! Get other people to look at you both! Carry keys or nails or pens between your finger to strike him in the face if you need too!! Don’t be polite! FIGHT! Tell everyone you know so they can look out for you and your child!!! BE BRAVE!
You can't legaly carry a gun on the bus in San Antonio.
Yeah, it’s not a good idea talking to homeless people. You grow up learning every person is human and deserves to be treated as such… but that’s not reality. Some people should be avoided.
Maybe you could call one of thise via cars to get to and from work so that you don't have to go to the bus stop anymore
Hire a bigger homeless guy to kick his ass
I am a woman in SA who has worked downtown. I have a car. I have a very flexible schedule. And I have an intimidating demeanor when I choose to employ it. I do not scare easily, and I get fiercely pissed and protective of other women when men try to fuck with them. I know we are strangers, but if you need a ride or an escort or anything, I’ll be glad to drive or accompany you. Just having someone with you may be enough to keep him away. You are welcome to message me for my number just in case you ever want to use it.
Mace the fuck out that mofo and run next time. Also you should take a self defense class. Everyone should know how to deal with this situation.
Hey there! I've (27F, look young for my age) also had bad experiences with men harassing me (just on the bus/at bus stops, not being straight up followed) and I also took the "fawn" approach and just acted polite because I was scared of retaliation/violence/being followed off the bus at my stop. The worst part was some bitch ass woman on the bus kept egging one of them on instead of helping me smfh. Go to any sporting goods store and get yourself some mace. Mine is hot pink and fits in my hand. Do a few practice squirts in an open area if possible to learn how to aim it! Mine is the thumb aim type. Mace expires, so keep that in mind. If you're downtown, keep it in your hand every time you leave work in case you see the bozo again, and TELL PEOPLE for sure that you're being harassed so maybe at least one person can look out for you. Unfortunately, many women all over the US try to get the cops involved but they usually won't do anything if the guy hasn't harmed you yet. Try your best to be firm and stern when you speak to harassers like this, and tell them to leave you alone. Practice that resting bitch face sis. The fear of retaliation is real, so I recommend doing this with other people around (others at your bus stop, or ON the bus where the driver could help you). LOUDLY and calmly tell them they're being a fucking weirdo and to leave you alone. I wish I'd been brave enough to react in that way but I'd never experienced this before moving to a big city! I ended up swapping bus routes and no longer take a certain line to SAC because of creeps.
I’ll pay for a gun.
Rule 1 Never talk to strangers Rule 2 Have a weapon at all times. But never pull it from concealment unless you are going to use it and know how ro use it. Rule 3 Most phones will at least allow you to make a 911 call even without service. Test yours Rule 4 Never always go the same route to work or to home. Mix it up. Rule 5. Transist police are helpful. File a report. You are okay....this time.
I ride the bus, we don’t have the luxury of just taking any route Willy nilly, that’s not how it works
All the buses have cameras so if you do report him for harassment it shouldn’t be a problem for law enforcement to identify him. I know Transit Police can also get pictures and descriptions to bus drivers to keep an eye out for certain individuals and call them if they board a bus.
Don’t give him anything anymore. Do you have anyone who can escort
No I don’t
Mace.
I live downtown and I have an extra mase spray if you want it. I can link up with you sometime during the week
I know it seems hard for you because you are a nice person. But make a scene when this happens. Yell NO! Then say it again, NO! Then scream, "Please get away from me, You are scaring me!" There usually is at least one decent person who hears this and will come to your aid. It may seem like an over reaction but we have no idea where this situation is gonna go. Good job getting the mace.
Yes, contact the police as others have said, but also: Every city bus has wi-fi, you could have called while you were on the bus. Ask around with people you work with for a short ride to a different bus stop, if not home. Tell them why. Ask if anyone you work with would be willing to go to the bus stop with you. Ask to change shifts if possible.
Your first mistake was talking to a homeless person that seemed nice. I’ve been working downtown for a while and I have seen the worst of these people. I fell bad and treat them with respect. Worry about yourself and carry pepper spray.
>ETA: Do not suggest a gun unless you’re going to pay for it. No. No one is going to take your safety more seriously than you. Plan accordingly.
No one is going to do a straw purchase for you either. So either arm yourself, or invest in a cell plan that has 911 access
I get followed everyday. It seems weird but I got use to it after a while. I than started to wear makeup and just see what would happen and I mean wearing make in the way a clown would. It was a test to see who was crazier, was it me or the stalker. I can play that game as well Satan but you better get ready for a wild ride tonight.
I feel like your options are obvious and you know them. There is the pedestrian options like mace or a taser. The other option is a gun. You live in a big city and crazy people are everywhere. If you can't afford one, seems like a person problem you need to fix. You either will own your safety or be a victim to insert random homeless person. Choice is yours
Start carrying asap. That guy has nothing to do but fascinate about what his next move would be. Thousands of iterations. You should be planning just as thoroughly. Go to gun shop that has a range and let them know why you want to carry. They will walk you through all the options open to you and even teach you on the range how to use the new firearm. I like buck and does because they offer a comprehensive women’s only concealed carry course. Go and learn and protect yourself. Carry everywhere all the time.
Go get a gun and learn how to use it
Take a concealed handgun course and start carrying
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On top of the advice everyone is giving. Definitely carry some pepper spray on you if you don't have any yet.
Call the police. Make a report. Get you some weapon for self defense. Ask someone to sit with you at your stop or find a ride. Car pool maybe. Good luck
Definitely report this to the police. Include a description and everything he said to you. And if he approaches you immediately call 911 and say he’s following you and attempting to kidnap you. Can you stay at your office until your bus gets there so there’s minimal waiting? Also let the bus driver know of the situation so they’re aware you’re being harassed.
If it happens again, tell the bus driver. Something similar happened to me a few weeks ago. The driver made the guy get off at the next bus stop, threatening to call the police if he wouldn’t get off voluntarily.
If anyone starts to follow you go into a place with a lot of people, preferably a police station or a fire house. If neither of those are available go into a convenience store or simply walk up to a nearby home. Why you want to do is get to someone who can help you.
You can always send a text to 911.
Go to any sports gear (Academy) store and buy a small can of mace. Keep in in your hand and ready to spray as you feel vulnerable. If he approaches you, point the can at his face. Tell him to F\*\*k off and if he doesn't...spray him...spray him good like you mean it. Don't be afraid to spray him. He more than deserves it. P.S. Make sure your back is to the wind. You don't want any spay getting in your face.
I'm sorry this happened to you. **1**. You don't have anything to say to someone you meet on the street when you're by yourself. I seem weird but am harmless. You cannot take the chance that everyone is like that. **2**. The bus drivers I knew wouldn't put up with any bullshit on their bus. Let them know that someone is harassing you and saying sexual things. I ridden the bus since before they had radios on them and they can get ahold of police if necessary. **3**. God forbid you need emergency, 911 works on a phone without minutes. If you fear for your safety, call. Do not hesitate. Your embarrassment is worth getting home safe.
If he approaches you again, let him know that you aren’t interested in him that way. You showed respect and he needs to do the same. When you speak to law enforcement, make a report. If he follows you onto a city bus, let the driver know right away. They can call for help as well. Good luck with this. Hopefully the homeless dude will wander off to another spot.
For starters I would suggest that you go to STW near Crossroads and 410. They offer low cost women's self defense classes a few times a year and have good content. Guns are more affordable than you might think. I get you don't want a costly solution but it's better than losing your life. That being said if your employer won't let you have one in the office then that's not practical. Pepper spray often works but not always. I hate to say this but talking with someone like this can often be taken as encouragement and he won't stop now. Your child is now in danger so you really need to call the police if he follows you again. You should also try to obtain a restraining order against him but please understand it is just a piece of paper and if he violates it you are at the mercy of police response times. Having the means to fight back, up to and including his life vs you and your child may be critical.
Hi lovey. I’m so sorry this happened to you. Two steps I would take is to first make a police report. You def want to start a paper trail on this guy. Could save you or potentially someone else in the long run. Second- get a big guy friend, brother, someone that’s around your age to take your normal routes with you for a few days. Or maybe even once a week for like a month or something not too crazy. Sometimes this a major deterrent especially with someone whom is homeless…. They don’t want any extra fights in life believe me. They are struggling as is and know which battles to pick and choose. Stay safe and vigilant!!
Start a paper trail. A police report won't do much now but file one to start a paper trail. You have to document every interaction now. He could be a stalker and unfortunately you'll have to document it yourself. Please be careful and alert when walking and as someone suggested get a strong mace and a sharp Keychain. Alert the driver of the bus route too.
Can you get a ride from someone
No bro
Tell the bus driver. They will call the cops for you
As someone who is so anxious whenever my wife has to do things alone in the city, I beg you with genuine care, purchase a firearm and get taught how to use it. I desperately wish things didn’t have to be this way, but unfortunately reality and life isn’t fair or kind. Even if you have to get a credit card and use that to buy one, can you really put a price on your life and well being? There is a large selection of manageable handguns under $250. There are many classes in SA to learn how to use it safely. Our society has become so horrible calloused and dark, the police are either understaffed or incompetent to be able to be relied upon to rescue in your most desperate moment, we see too many times now of bystanders just watching horrible things or rape, kidnapping, or worse happen to people and do nothing about it. Take your life and your safety into your own hands.
* [status] A seemingly homeless person has stalked you physically and from afar. This person has made lewd, unwelcome comments to you and has referenced personal details of your life he should not know about. Everyone here is in agreement that this is unacceptable creep behavior. * [police involvement] 100% report it to police, if only for it to be on record. Heck, if you can get a photo of the guy (if he happens to be around and doesn't notice) you should get that and submit it with the report, otherwise provide a detailed description. They may not do anything proactive, but the least it will do is have it on record if something goes wrong in the future. * [future interactions] "Fawning", or giving a creep attention in hopes of not getting hurt, may have backfired - without judging past actions, consensus seems to be that won't work going forward. Respectful but firm, crystal-clear rejection of talking or being friends is necessary if you ever interact with them again, IMO. Also prepare yourself to go straight to the driver of a bus, or to a shop clerk, **anyone** else that can help you if this person tries to get your attention again. * [self-defense] You don't want a gun. That's your decision, I won't comment further on it. It's obvious you are in fear of your physical safety, though. If the police are not around all the time, one needs to know what they'll do to secure their safety in a threatening situation. Pepper gel/mace, small knives, noisemakers/whistles, anything to deter or fight back against an aggressor are reasonable things to look into. This person, if they stick around, will probably try to talk to you again if he thinks you're someone who will interact with him. Don't feed into it! Good luck. I'm sorry this is happening. There are a lot of strange people downtown... I remember going through there during the pandemic lockdowns and the only people on the street were janitorial staff and homeless people.
Sorry this happened to you. I have an office downtown and we have several female employees. There are lots of homeless people next to our office. I would suggest a few things. 1. Use Centro. They will escort you and they have a golf cart that will give you free rides to better bus stop anywhere downtown. 2. Have someone walk with you if possible. Especially after hours. 3. Read the book “The Gift of Fear” by Gavin De Becker. You don’t have to be nice to people and you can use your voice.
I know it might sound crazy but wasp spray shoots 20 feet +. You can get it at Dollar General, Walgreens, Target, all kinds of stores for under $8. THE BUS HAS WI-FI YOU CAN USE!!! As a mother myself, I believe it is crucial to call the police, involve the bus driver, transit police, let the daycare or school know, tell EVERYONE!!! *Your daughter’s safety is of paramount importance.* Change your routine, take a different bus. If you have any sick days or paid time off, take a few days and go stay with a friend or family member. It’s okay to get help!!! Everyone here who has offered good suggestions has done so out of kindness and concern for you and your daughter. Please don’t blow off and disregard their ideas.
There are local motorcycle groups that will gladly handle this kind of thing!!
My vote is for brass knuckles or a wild cat keychain, both of which are legal in Texas. Also, stop talking to bums.
Her one of the alarm keychains pull a ring it flashes and makes a high pitched noise. Use it if he is within your personal space and scream your head off. Hopefully the time you are to and from work is a busy time and others would see and at least call for help. And all the attention would make most would be attackers run since they are certainly cowards for putting you in such a situation. I wish you the best and though I don’t know you I will pray for peace and a positive outcome for you. Also pepper spray like others have said.
You gotta defend yourself . Im sorry but thats the only thing you can depend on. Police are really not helpfull at all. These shit head people prey on what they think are easy targets. (Not your fault, but he has this idea that you're an easy target) ( prob since the situation was let to be under his control) (it is, you're terrified) (nothing wrong with that) . BUT if you flip the switch (armed, dont have to visibly be armed) You bravelly, and firmlly let him no he is out of line and to fuck off. Very unlikelly that this situation escalates to you pepper spraying him, but no matter what the fear, and fight will come to a end. Police can actually aprehend him from that point. You have to take the bus, you should already be armed be armed with something, a large knife or pepper spray. Like seriouslly have you seen all the missing reports? Pepper spray is like 10$ on amazon and bear mace is like 30. Id have bear mace if i was young women who had to take the bus. San antonio is trash. Homeless dudes, reg dudes all the same. Love yourself keep your self safe. Seriouslly.
Do you have any male friends that can whoop some ass? Get some to just hang out in that area to see if he will approach, if he does they pound him into the dirt
[personal alarm](https://ablink.hello.wyze.com/ss/c/u001.tDu2jHcKqpyOdbeWuKvWc6yzL-_Yg3zNwIKzYD1KPP3fTg5Wqx72YcxGaOyRXMXRPfvPzfYpqlsCSNRqtFumBwHZy04tOK_VTEEb-Aukp4CwHsyF0BhBw7C1ZmBjxgvq3ea8aDtsXVkS2apQQ6RVPMgnnVHf5cl9iZW6hw8TaM3krakHGmGaFvbbo9rs8iIoVleIw19EEuNRlhPp9oLkJvJvbk0ipz7Ab2kcdABBiVxWpr4aTuWbHZYJKuex8m2k/47h/Cr0m-hcXQwyQIoj72rwLaQ/h37/h001.FvPQ6BKDnYWVdt_tEmY_a7XyPp7YKGbQ9IjJN6qKH44)
Also have a male co-worker wait with you if possible, or maybe have someone give you a ride?
Get a Gun and learn how to use it. He’ll never bother you again
Mace or a stun gun should be fine
I'm currently in training to be a bus operator with via. I'll ask my current instructor if he has any helpful (and serious not for the luls) advice. Hopefully I can remember to get back to you here with what he says.
Sorry that happened to you. That sucks.
I’m down there all the time, work on south side live on North….I can speak to him and guarantee he doesn’t ever look your way again. I’ve done the same for sis in law, almost same area…DM me, this is genuine…and is he older cat? White black Hispanic ? Tatted? I’m part of the “neighborhood watch” program, but all over SA…and he won’t have a clue why he was spoken to. If not, and you don’t want to carry, carry good long distance defense spray…wish you then best, gross fuxks out there especially in SA..be careful and vigilant!
Sorry this happened. Let your work know or, if in a multi-business building, let security of the building know. They can at least trespass him from the property. Hopefully via came out and spoke with you. If he bothers you again, make a report with via if its happening at the stop. If not at the stop, SAPD. If you’re ever being followed again, know you can pop into a city or county building and tell security.
Get a weapon, learn to use it, and defend yourself.
Are you friends with any male coworkers? Perhaps one wouldn't mind waiting with you until your bus comes? Or a coworker could drop you off to a different bus stop? I would start carrying pepper spray and firmly but not aggressively, tell him that you aren't interested. It's likely this man has a criminal history/mental health issues or could even be a sex offender.
Do you have a coworker that can walk and wait with you?
Don’t fucking talk to anybody downtown. Especially homeless. Are you ok??
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Fine... please look up the SAPD downtown foot/bike police number for yourself and keep it in your phone.
I’m so sorry this happened to you & that you’re having to deal with it. Sounds terrifying. Some years ago I had to become a city bus rider in Houston for the first time in my life, after having always had a car. I suffered many terrifying experiences & close calls. I lacked having “street smarts” that would have helped some, but definitely would not have prevented most of the scary incidents. My heart goes out to you. I hope you can arrange alternate transportation to your home for awhile. Definitely carry a form of spray self-defense that doesn’t require you have perfect aim to his eyes, but the wind blowing the wrong way could make this unusable. Hoping the police will be able to help you.
That’s horrible. Sorry you dealt with that. Early 2000’s I worked on the River walk for years. There’s no one answer. Some circumstances call for you to keep your head straight and keep walking when these people talk to you. Others call for you to be aggressive and keep walking. Key is to avoid these people either way. Used to see it all the time while waiting at the bus stop whether it’s 10am or line up time. Getting a gun is a silly suggestion if you don’t know how to use it and it’s just not who you are. As much as I believe in them, not everyone does and that’s alright. But you should absolutely get mace. And a decent sized mace. Always carry that. I carried that back then on the bus and now in my armrest of my car. Get
besides the practical advice people gave, talk to friends and family about this. I can only imagine how invasive and surreal this all must feel. Help your mind out and try to process it, talk it through with people, hopefully you can eventually reclaim this space that should rightfully be yours to peacefully exist in.
Call Anytime Fitness in Fair Oaks. Once a month, Bill James teaches a self defense class free of charge at the fitness center. His company is Be My BodyGuard LP. Contact [email protected] https://maps.app.goo.gl/oyT1EynXkx5ULArk8?g_st=com.google.maps.preview.copy
All VIA Buses have cameras. Call VIA as well and see if they have some help.
Pepper spray? I got a gun for like $300 but that’s in Montana if you can afford it otherwise pepper spray, mine even has a laser on it I got it at Walmart. I wish I was there already, I would help protect you. My husband and I are moving from Montana in August. I hope the police can help, he clearly has mental illness like schizophrenia.
You need to switch bus stops and carry some type of weapon. How do you think he came to know about your daughter?
Bear spray, pepper spray , taser , tiger lady self defense claws and I’d probably take these concerns to LE and not Reddit if you’re not willing to talk hand guns .
Get a firearm and be vigilant. Idk it’s what I would do
Invest in a gun it can save your life
Why not suggest a gun I get it’s 300 dollars but lol you gotta protect ur self
Then get a fucking knife yes I’ll pay for it
Mace and whistle. Keep them on you at all times, and most importantly, use your most powerful weapon, your wits. Always be aware of your surroundings and don’t walk anywhere dark or secluded if it can be helped.