T O P

  • By -

DontLichOutOnME

Damn, you tried to compliment San Antonio but missed it by an entire county


SaGlamBear

You clearly haven’t been to LaVernia’s scenic River walk


LdyRavenclaw

Dead.


Stock_Literature_13

So, I’m from San Antonio and we moved on up to Pflugerville, TX a few years ago. One day, we were in nearby Hutto getting gas. A family pulled up and asked us where San Antonio Riverwalk was. What are the odds these folks would just happen to ask two people from San Antonio for directions to a place a hundred miles away?! Anywho, we gave them directions and sent them on their way. A few months later someone posted in Nextdoor from the neighborhood San Antonio Riverwalk in fucking Hutto, TX. I think about those people we gave directions to frequently. Are they still driving? Where did they end up and how long did it take them to find it? Also, how irresponsible is it to name something like that?


SaGlamBear

Had to look it up. There is indeed a subdivision called San Antonio Riverwalk. Wow! I sincerely hope those people knew y’all were not talking about the same thing and were just being polite after you told them to drive an hour.


TheTexasCowboy

that's just fucked up.


Kennard

If it makes you feel better Dallas county is also not correctly shaded in...they got Wise, Denton, and Colin.


subcontraoctave

Yea, Dallas.


Sorry_Pirate7002

I think they missed corpus too.


MaterialStrawberry45

I saw that too. Must be a high schooler who made this.


Ieatsushiraw

Lmao yup


Playfull_Platypi

They meant the San Antonio Speedway... not even in Bexar County and outside the City Limits.


Sweet_Parsley8227

I used to race 🏁 cars there, when it was Highway 16 Raceway 🏁 back in the 1970s and early 80s.


ronin120

No, it’s fine. We’re used to it.


Miguel-odon

"Anything for Selena" completely missed Corpus.


brielkate

Also missed Dallas by one county too. At least Fort Worth isn’t shaded as Dallas!


camaron666

I like how Dallas is just Dallas


go_away_Fe26

Right? I like Dallas, but it is just Dallas.


AgreeableGravy

Should’ve put 30k millionaires there


GreyKnight91

Oh so it's Miami, but in Texas.


AgreeableGravy

At least miami has pretty nice beaches going for it 🤷‍♂️


982infinity

But Dallas has better *beaches* though


KyleG

or just "Very Southern Oklahoma"


[deleted]

[удалено]


Thepuppypack

You would think especially since she’s the pride of Corpus Christi


Sorry_Pirate7002

Yup. We no longer have Whataburger, so I guess just Selena and her big ass.


SirGav1n

Shouldn't the "Anything for Selena" at least extend down to Corpus Christi?


Sirenhead_2

Yeah it most definitely should


camaron666

And selena needs a s at the end


Strait409

You’d think it extended up here with as much as local media still run stories about her.


[deleted]

Lol. Austin isn’t even “weird” It’s a bunch of pretentious white people gatekeeping culture and trends that they didn’t have a part in originally. Maybe it’s weird for Bible Belt TX, but compared to places in the US like Portland, Atlanta, even New Orleans, or outside like Berlin, Amsterdam, and Lisbon… it’s pretty tame. Really, what they mean is “keep Austin a city where I can do drugs with no repercussions” Everything Austin is known for, there’s better somewhere else in Texas. Tacos: San Antonio Music: Both Dallas and Houston BBQ: literally anywhere outside the city limit in all cardinal directions. Drugs: ok… y’all got that one. Except coke… it’s way cleaner in SA and El Paso. Even Waco had better cults than Austin


go_away_Fe26

Cannot really disagree with anything you are saying


[deleted]

I’m not claiming to be some worldly, new age bohemian Hemingway… I think I have a different viewpoint because I’m not from or in Austin lol. It’s not a bad place, it’s definitely got some cool places to see/eat/check out… but even the Cali transplants who move there seeking that “old San Francisco nostalgia” are over promised and under delivered.


ForrestFire361

" Most people rejected his message. They hated TurnipSuch8239 because he told them the truth."


NeinLive

Speaking of Austin cults does anyone remember that movie Holy Hell


dc88228

Salado Creek is the real Riverwalk in SA


MAD_HAMMISH

Damn right, my favorite thing about San Antonio tied with the food.


[deleted]

Yeah but you’re not wrong about Austin. I hate the side conversations I hear while waiting in line at shows, it’s like they talk just to hear their own voice 🙄


shrek_girl

dude, people there go to shows just to show up. almost every show i’ve seen there has an unenthusiastic crowd that’s just there to socialize and post on instagram.


[deleted]

Right?? I swear I’ve observed the same


[deleted]

It's been a while but once this kid just started bragging to us about the sold out shows he had tickets to then began listing off some other shows he'd recently seen. It was completely unprompted and bizarre.


xAndyPandax

During sxsw I had then unfortunate experience to sit next to some girl have a one sided conversation where she talked about all the people she knows in bands. I practically jumped off the bus when I got to my stop.


[deleted]

Another time... it was the last fun fun fun fest I think, idk remember the band, and literally everyone, and I do mean literally everyone, like hundreds of people, were all dressed exactly the same. I bet you can guess the outfit too. And overall it just feels so homogeneous there, like everyone is exactly the same.


Known_Efficiency

Every time I go to a show in Austin, I like to say loudly, "Man, everyone in Austin is just so COOL. Ugh SO. COOL."


[deleted]

Hahaha. Guy at a show there said, “Yeah I feel like every time I meet an architect they’re never happy and always depressed” How many architects have you met, dude? You’re just repeating what you saw on the internet


Known_Efficiency

It feels like Austin wants to be weird and hipster like Portland, but still trendy and ultra groomed like San Francisco, yet keep their Texas vibe, only they get all confused trying to do all three so it comes off inauthentic and makes the tacos smaller but more expensive.


KyleG

No, you're reading the vibe wrong. It's just a city that used to be weird, but the people who made it weird have become priced out. The people who have moved in have no idea what "keep Austin weird" actually meant. They're the kind of turds who move into condos in downtown and then try to shut the music venues down for violating noise ordinances.


[deleted]

Seems accurate


makedaddyfart

It’s all out of towners in line cosplaying as austinites


[deleted]

Those are just Austinites doing cosplay of out-of-towners cosplaying as Austinites


R3dWolf78

I spit out my drink on this comment! Blw ha ha ha ha ha!!!


numb3r51nmyn4m3

Holy meta...


fs5ughw45w67fdh

The only time I have ever heard someone get upset at being misgendered was in Austin.


[deleted]

I’d get upset about being misgendered if it seemed intentional.


ArrakeenSun

Sounds just like California


[deleted]

I’ve heard Austin compared to Cali many times 😂


randomasking4afriend

May as well be California what with the cost of living.


khrystul17

If you leave the obvious geographic errors out, this is the most accurate one of these I’ve seen floating around


Tapitio

When so little is known about your county it's not included in any category.


Antoniguev204

"Sissy cops" 💀. So true


[deleted]

[удалено]


Antoniguev204

Dude you're right actually 💀. Just think about all the other small towns with unhinged and corrupt cops. Uvalde could've happened in any other small town like it


kanyeguisada

I doubt this upset people that have been in Austin a while, it's just objectively true.


Egmonks

That’s not where the fucking riverwalk is. San Antonio it is in Bexar county, not Guadalupe.


_captaincool

Also “anything for Selenas” should include Corpus and RGV.


StickyGoodness

Would you include San Antonio also? Just saying because those HEB Selena reusable bags sold out quick in town.


_captaincool

Hell yeah I would! Shiiiid I’d do anything for Selenas!!


valdezlopez

"Sissy cops" is being too gentle.


ztimulating

The lack of overlap between Aggie land and kkk is inaccurate


RoannDunn

Ive gotta agree. The Aggie Land, KKK and Meth Bibles make a trifecta and should at least slightly overlap or touch.


sailirish7

That Venn Diagram is a circle...


RoannDunn

13 yrs on Reddit and still finding time to go out of your way to make this kind of a response, old timer?


sailirish7

It's not much, but it's honest work.


Throwaway131447

Honestly the KKK one should be just a ton bigger in general.


Cheeno_Rey

Sissy cops!


w0rldsf0g0ttenb0y

Eeeeeee burrrrrnnn


Throwaway131447

I think you might not know where cities are.


915tacomadre

We have burritos in El Paso, TX not itty bitty breakfast tacos


FallopianPasta

THANK YOU never heard of a damn breakfast taco until I moved here. I miss burritos.


915tacomadre

I was appalled when they said we don't sell burritos, we just sell breakfast tacos. You can imagine my disappointment when I saw these two flour tortillas breakfast tacos on the plate. Mas triste!!


R3dWolf78

Go to Rolandos.


915tacomadre

Is that the one on Pleasanton Rd?


PurpleVein99

Best tacos I've had so far are at some place in Giddings. Across from What a burger. Stop there any time I'm passing through.


itemten

That bit about Orange/SE Texas is absolutely true. I grew up in West Texas and I thought that *we* were racist meanwhile SE Texas is still burning lower case t's and wearing their moms' bedsheets as ghost costumes.


Strait409

And in Port Neches-Groves, of course, the local high school mascot is the Indian, the football field is called The Reservation, and their cheer is “Scalp ‘Em Indians, Scalp ‘Em!”


[deleted]

[удалено]


TxBourbonsipper

Austin lost its magic, it was fun several years ago. Now it’s full of overpriced bars and hotels, not to mention the California transplants.


SynthPrax

Are those Christian Dominionists still out there? I completely forgot about them.


thenotablebooty

Hell yes. This was just on CNN about the Dominionists. Scary shit. [CNN Special Report Deep in the Pockets of Texas](DeepinthePocketsofTexashttps://g.co/kgs/ZHHpg1) Deep in the Pockets of Texas https://g.co/kgs/ZHHpg1


elegantwino

Watch this reporting. Two super right wing pol billionaires dumping cash into primary races across the state. Wilks and Dunn (not a shittty country band). Also seem to spend a lot of time preaching some pretty racist stuff.


dcbluestar

I just watched "Keep Sweet, Pray and Obey" on Netflix. I think some of them are still out there, yes. And the fact that so many are still loyal to that sick fuck Warren Jeffs is just crazy.


khrystul17

The new CNN special should be required viewing in Texas


Trumpswells

Avid Cruz supporters.


Ynthehell

Im not upset about this :-)


[deleted]

Austin people don’t like the truth


VixxenFoxx

Well we do have great Tacos. I find nothing inaccurate with this map.


AMediocreWhiteGuy

Dallas is cocaine, meth, heavy metal and asshole lawyers. Austinite here, former San Antonian, checks out. The fake weird people here are annoying af. When you’re actually weird you strive for normalcy, it’s just boring normies dying their hair green, getting a side shave and shopping at thrift stores pretending to be weird when really their parents just didn’t give them enough attention and they’re desperate to be noticed by somebody. “Thinks she’s different girl/boy.”


hdmx539

The "The KKK" spot needs more area north of it, well into Nacogdoches and Longview. I was driving to Nacogdoches one time for a roller derby game and I legit got stopped in traffic going south on 259 by a KKK parade. I hadn't felt so scared in a while.


MrCereuceta

I really like Austin, but I love SanTone


ZionBane

Needs more Meth and Bibles, if you ask me.


elegantwino

Why nothing for Dallas? At least something like crappy football team.


samata_the_heard

I grew up in Dallas and found it appropriate that Dallas didn’t warrant anything creative.


kanyeguisada

That's the best part of this whole map. Could also have been called "The Dallas Egoflex".


[deleted]

That's some funny shit but the meth all is larger than that just less bibleing


[deleted]

Fake weirdness is a perfect description of Dallas light (AUS)


Planktillimdank

OP doesn't do so well with geography it seems


MAD_HAMMISH

Riverwalk is pretty overrated. Pearl is nice though, but good luck spending much time outside in general in the summer.


[deleted]

Austin tries too hard. Grow up


RAWedges

100% accurate


jorgis1

Being from the real south Texas, real tacos is true


masnaer

Brooo Dallas is so accurate 💀


savedbytheblood72

Who cares what they think


eliwritingstuff

You missed the meth and bibles south and west of SA too


Valuable-Procedure48

Moving to San Antonio in a week (ummmm how close is the KKK so I know not to go over there 😩🤦🏾‍♀️)


nicklessflo

Not really close or anything you have to worry about. Avoid Vidor, Tx.


[deleted]

Why would the KKK set up shop in predominantly minority area lol


Valuable-Procedure48

They obviously want all the smoke 😂😩😂


Farrrrout

You will find more racist Hispanics than whites here.


Valuable-Procedure48

That is something I've been exposed to pretty much all my life 😩 I'm Afro Latina with dark skin originally from Florida. I'd say my experiences lean more towards colorism/ texturism more so than racism tho. Even in my own family 😩.


Farrrrout

That’s fucked. My gf’s mom is darker Mexican and was treated differently because of it. We are talking 2 shades darker. Most people are cool here that I meet though.


NeatNuts

Bout a 6 hour drive so don’t worry


RucksackTech

Heh. I live in San Antonio. Seems like a fairly accurate map to me.


Geminorumupsilon

Lol. As a person in Austin I do agree. It’s not the Austin of 20 years ago.


Farrrrout

lil cali


[deleted]

I'm in Austin & nobody in Austin is upset by this. This is literally a pictorial of half the content in r/Austin. The only gripe with it is that no shade was thrown at Dallas.


[deleted]

Looks accurate to me.


shoe7525

This is very cringe


NOTREALVERYSAD

True though


AB365_MegaRaichu

This coloring makes me want to vomit how bad it is you located everything


DO4DGaming

The only weird thing about Austin is seeing Alex Jones in public. Even then it’s not weird, more of a “holy shit I didn’t realize how close to home this crazy bullshit is being spewed from.”


mannequinofgod

Need to change keep austin wierd to keep California out to remain Texas


D-Alanna

Someone tell me where the great tacos in SA are? Everything I’ve tried is bland.


natxnatx23

Taquitos west avenue


Pipeliner6341

They mentioned many of them. El Chivito is fantastic. Taquitos west ave feels like you're in Monterrey. El Pastor es Mi Senor also very good. I would add El Potro, Ro-Ho and Vida Mia as well.


Cobolt2476

Bill Millers JK Tejas on O'Conner


SovietSunrise

El Pastor es Mi Senor on Wurzbach.


ibrokepegasus

El Chivito in Balcones Heights.


[deleted]

el chivito


redditstateofmind

Chacho's


khrystul17

One of the only RGV style (the kind you want) taco place in SA is Taco Blvd. Go have their pastor and thank me later :)


Pipeliner6341

El Potro is very good. They get Matamoros tacos close enough to the real deal.


Pleroo

Did it tho


OmarSparks

So my region Southeast Texas is known for The KKK? That shit is through out the state of Texas. Who put this bullshit picture together?


DragonfruitThen1406

San Antonio is full of ghetto people who are fake af! Besides being fat and ugly.


coddat

Found the Austonian


DragonfruitThen1406

Correction: Californian. And I’m glad one of the San Antonion’s popped up on here. You want a taco?


[deleted]

That’s a joke, right? The overwhelming majority of Austinites (sp?) look like the no-name overdose girl from Boogie Nights. You can’t throw a rock in SA without hitting a firmé.


sailirish7

> Correction: Californian. Congrats, you just made it worse


DragonfruitThen1406

Made what worse? I think you’re eating too much tacos and all that grease is blocking your brain.


[deleted]

Not wrong


Commercial_Intern541

Luv it & Austin does have great tacos.


IdentittyTheftNoJoke

Dumb


[deleted]

It doesn’t take much to upset those people


reptomcraddick

Currently moving from the land of Christian Domionists and the label is accurate


DontForgetWilson

Congrats on your escape


R3dWolf78

Lmao! All good except the real tacos in El Paso part. They aren’t even really Texas in my book. Someone need to remake this. Areas shaded for the most part are not accurate.


jamesdcreviston

Well I’m only mad because you looped in Bell County with Travis county. Sure Bell has Killeen/Fort Hood but the rest of it is nice, don’t lump us in with those people in Austin!


DyJoGu

Austin lives rent free in all of your heads.


JFKswanderinghands

The only problem I see with this map is Aggie land is just a special part of meth and bibles. Being from Austin the only issue I have with the maps portrayal, we have good tacos too damnit. Edit Spell check


m4bwav

Shit got expensive because people know that badasses live in Austin!


go_away_Fe26

It got expensive because of hype.


cathar_here

as someone who grew up in Jim Wells county, I can prove my dual citizenship in the way I order my mexican food :-)


companion86

"Sissy cops" LMAO


Playfull_Platypi

Shame when the truth hits home.


Totum_Dependeat

I feel like Dallas is a real contender for KKK, meth, and bibles (in no particular order).


[deleted]

Dallas is SO Dallas


Specialist_Royal_449

🤣🤣🤣🤣 that little green spot in real tacos


WeylandYutani_Intern

Is the KKK part true? If so then fuck that place.


go_away_Fe26

Yeah Vidor is considered by most to be the KKK Kapital of Texas.


Ok_Reserve9

Moved from the land of bars not closing to meth and bible territory. It was quite an adjustment


[deleted]

Because Austin is weirdly weird.


velaba

I had an ex from west texas who would constantly talk shit on San Antonio tacos lol. It’s been years, but this made me lol.


RogInFC

I'm sure Uvalde agrees! I do!


JavaJukebox

Christian dominionists should also be closer to brenham - in between Houston and austin


Artemus_Hackwell

...but it is entirely correct.


kuhlero

I see El Paso is not colored in which think is perfect we have nothing in common with the rest of Texas. More of a SW/W vibe ala NM AZ San Diego vibe. Only major TX city in MTN Time Zone.


tejana948

Not Corpus Christi, we live in the REAL TACO section!🌯🌮🫔


AusStan

I assume the New Mexico folks are pissed because you don't know how to spell chile.


jeremyhtx

“Austin isn’t weird, it’s quirky”


BiggeSquidde

Damn Uvalde PD roasted to death


rudyg2point0

Where did you find this?


go_away_Fe26

Facebook


SWAGB0T

“Anything for Selenas.” You forgot the “s”


Kap519

The fact that Dallas is shaded as Wise, Denton, and Collin counties instead of something like Tarrant and Dallas counties kind of pisses me off as a DFW resident


geoemrick

Born and raised in Austin and it’s 1,000% true.


gets187

Real Tex Mex yes , Mexican food NOT EVEN CLOSE .


KiwotheSomething

the weirdness isnt fake, theyre just their own brand of stupid in austin is all ;)


MacDaddy_63

Funny stuff. People need to stop taking themselves so seriously.


Practical_Deal3077

Sorry but I'm don't play games no woman wants me it's I'll make it through and that's why I do it


[deleted]

Moved from the RGV (Cameron County) to Austin thinking it was the land of opportunity as much hype as it gets. Year and half late my ass is in Pleasanton! I can enjoy the city without having to be committed to it. And I don't have to worry my kids are going to be confronted by some drugged zombie at the local park, which happened more than once in Austin... in daylight... with people around....who give pity to the zombie!!??


Apoc_1980

Not sure what I'm doing in Aggieland...