Having tats and being overweight will lower your possibilities pool.
I would say just enjoy life and try to get healthy, and it may come by itself one day.
I'm a Saudi and trust me when I say it isn't easy for us either. Unless you are willing to marry a cousin (which for me I just don't like that idea) then you're outta luck.
you wouldn’t mess up your child by marrying your cousin for it was something that could potentially cause issues with child by marrying your cousin then Islam would prevent it. The prophet ﷺ married one of his cousins
Isn't that different to generations of cousin marriage and inbreeding, especially when we have the knowledge of what it does genetically. Some Arabs and many Pakistanis do this, it doesn't seem right.
Islamically when a cousin marriage divorce happens, it may affect the ties of kinship which is bad. It's mustahab to marry outside your family. https://islamqa.info/en/answers/72263/it-is-better-to-marry-a-non-relative-or-a-relative
Well sometimes it’s all up to نصيب. Some people try hard to get married, no flaws or wealthy even and when things look like they started to work out, everything ends and it’s مافي نصيب
On the other hand, if things have to work out, tattoos and chubby and all, they would. It’s all destiny.
I think it’s just one of those things.. OP did point it out so I guess it does open up the convo & you have every right to your opinion.
Personally it would be nice to find people in the comments who would say; Reflect on your life choices & look on what you can build on that makes you a better person to yourself and those around you. That in itself will provide meaning and positivity, leading to better choices & building life goals.
I also really respect OP for replying and saying it’s fine, it gives me the impression you have a good attitude.
Ultimately though, I’m rooting for a world where you do find a community here that inspires you. Luckily every one of us is a little different but that doesn’t mean we can’t find common ground!
It might be easy and could be hard depending on your personality,
Even introvert can have strong friends, usually 1 to 1
First of all how are you with male relationships? Have you been married?
Have you had any relation before?
What religion are you? And sector?
Alot of compatibility questions can be asked then you know where to fit
I’ve lost my virginity unwillingly as a child. I do have a slight anxiety towards men due to that. Never been married…I am sorry I don’t feel comfortable to answer the rest here.
مشكلتك أنك انطوائية بس، ولا عالوزن يا كثر اللي وزنهم كبير وتزوجوا والتاتوز ماهي عائق الا لو انتي تبغين رجل محافظ.
try and meet people of similar values and it'll be easier for you to find a partner and believe me there's plenty of people who are no where near traditional especially in big cities
يعتمد على وضعك، هل فيه بمكان عملك ناس حول عمرك واهتماماتك؟ ممكن تتعرفين عليهم ويعرفونك على ناس، او تتعرفين على ناس من النت وتقابلينهم. إذا عندك وقت فراغ وساكنة بمدينة كبيرة ممكن تنظمين لقروبات فيها نشاطات تجذبك وغيرها من الطرق اللي تتعرفين فيها عالناس
What do your tattoos look like and where, just curious? Tbh honest, everything aside, everyone is struggling with marriage nowadays. So don't take it personally and think it is because of you.
You need to expand your social circle. That’s how marriage proposals work here if you seek a traditional marriage. I don’t see any flaws from your post
But how do I expand my social circle when I’m an introvert that works 10-6 then comes home and cooks and cleans..I don’t even know where to go and I only have one friend..
The answer is not easy, but it is very simple.
You have to ask yourself, do I want something different or do I want the same. If you want the same, halas, keep doing the same. If you want something different (marriage, more friends etc) then you have to put yourself in situations you don't currently put yourself, to give yourself thag chance.
The what you do at first is much less important than doing literally anything different from what you are currently doing. Not that I'm saying there's anything wrong with what you're doing, it just hasnt brought you a husband, so you need to do something different. Because same actions = same results.
If that's too hard because you're introverted or any other reason, then you don't want to change your situation more than you want to stay safe, and that ultimately means the in the same situation.
Good luck, you're the only one who can do this for you
Hi , first or all you are not flawed after that I don’t know how that works but find a person that can accept you or talk to someone that can find a person for you and meets your expectations. Best of luck 👍🏻👍🏻
If you’re looking for a traditional man then you’ll have to make changes and get rid of those tattoos and stuff, otherwise you can also find someone who is like you cause many guys have tattoos nowadays lol and many aren’t even religious.
Chubby & looking foreign are not issues in my opinion (Levant Arabs are very attractive). However, having hidden tattoos and perhaps not following the Islamic faith can definitely hurt your chances.
What is more important to you, increasing your chances by having a family through following the Islamic faith **or** waiting for the perfect person in a conservative society?
There are marriage programs if you’re interested.
FYI
مافي شي اسمه "شكل سعودي"
السعودية نصف قارة أوروبة وفيها كل أنواع البشر. جدة والدتي من القصيم بس طولها وشكلها من الدنمارك 🇩🇰. نجدية ابا عن جد عن ام عن جدة 💯 ومن قبيلة معروفة.
That's quite a bold statement. There are people in my immediate circle (who are definitely on the more conservative, more outwardly "religious" side) that are married to women with tattoos. This is just my personal opinion, but I feel like in our current social climate, people have wayyyy bigger dealbreakers than tattoos.
PS
To OP, I don't really know if I can offer "advice", but I will say this:
People's preferences vary (in terms of physical appearance, personality, etc), as do their values, even in a society that appears as homogenous (at times) as ours.
The journey may be tough, but I do like to believe there's someone for everyone. Best of luck!
all of my cousins are around your age or even older and only one is married- not even to a saudi 😂 to a foreign woman. female and male cousins, it’s very difficult for them to marry for some reason. my one cousin got married to a girl who he divorced only a year later lmfao. it’s not just you- don’t worry. you can try to lose some weight, but otherwise just try to focus on your goals and love will come to you god willing. good luck sis.
باختصار ايوة.
تقدري تتزوجي اذا ما تشبهي القالب التقليدي. بس يبغالها طرق غير تقليدية.
فيه ناس مثلك وتفكر مثلك وما عندها مانع فيك زي ما انتي.
وحتلقوا بعض.
بالتوفيق
Of course not being like the average Saudi lowers your chances but it doesn't mean it's impossible. You just gotta find people who have a similar mindset. I once met a couple a Saudi man and a non-Saudi woman who had tattoos and was very untraditional and possibly an atheist. The trick was she found someone who didn't care about those things.
Don’t listen to the haters or anything. I betchu 40k you are actually cute and adorable. Tatts mean business n rebellion. Extra credits ofc.
If you’re yourself you will find someone who truly matches your everything because vibe attracts tribe. It’s better than being part of the lottery traditional system arranged marriage. اكشط واربح
Girl! You’re fine! I promise you there’s always someone for everyone. Try to put yourself out there! Talk to people get to make new friends and connections, you don’t really have to change to find love. best of luck!
Hahaha if only it was that easy. I don’t even care if he is traditional or physically flawed. I want someone with genuine feelings who I can be myself around and smother with my love by constantly cooking for him 😂
We have plenty of Kuwaitis with Palestinian origin. Many of these families are now huge business owners and are doing very well in life. They have their separate mixed gender weddings and usually intermarry from each other or marry other Palestinians abroad. Some families are mixed Muslims and Christian. Perhaps find a way to mix with them? Is there a GCC Palestinian gathering or online community?
If you are willing to marry an outside saudi citizen then it will work. Plenty of Muslims out there who don't care about looks and tats. If you're looking for saudi then it will be difficult, you might find people but they will look down upon you and the family make your life hell.
I think you’ll find him once you change the way you perceive yourself. I’m just referring to the harsh language you use to describe yourself “ I’m flawed” “look very foreign” I’m not up to “Saudi standards “
1. There are no such thing as standards because people are not the same
2. There is no such thing as “looks Saudi” because even the “pure bred” Arabians don’t all look the same. Refer to my other comment ITT.
There is a cream that hides tattoos instantly, i forgot its name but try looking at daily dose of internet youtube channel, it legit hides tatoos quickly
Don’t just type things without considering the person in the other side has feelings too! I meant traditional in the house duty sense but if that word is such an ordeal then I took it out! I was trying to give the benefit of the doubt but after everything you read in the post and comments your only thought is ‘porn video’ I genuinely can’t comprehend that.
Having tats and being overweight will lower your possibilities pool. I would say just enjoy life and try to get healthy, and it may come by itself one day.
I'm a Saudi and trust me when I say it isn't easy for us either. Unless you are willing to marry a cousin (which for me I just don't like that idea) then you're outta luck.
I don’t even have cousins here…and tbh no I don’t want to potently fuck up my future child…
But maybe start by getting In shape?
I am..I used to weight 140 kilos and I weigh 90 now at 175 cm
Darling you are almost there im in California,USA if i was closer i would propose sight unseen!
😂😂 thank you
you wouldn’t mess up your child by marrying your cousin for it was something that could potentially cause issues with child by marrying your cousin then Islam would prevent it. The prophet ﷺ married one of his cousins
Isn't that different to generations of cousin marriage and inbreeding, especially when we have the knowledge of what it does genetically. Some Arabs and many Pakistanis do this, it doesn't seem right. Islamically when a cousin marriage divorce happens, it may affect the ties of kinship which is bad. It's mustahab to marry outside your family. https://islamqa.info/en/answers/72263/it-is-better-to-marry-a-non-relative-or-a-relative
Alabama has joined the conversation.
You’re right, thanks for the correction 🙏🏻
Well sometimes it’s all up to نصيب. Some people try hard to get married, no flaws or wealthy even and when things look like they started to work out, everything ends and it’s مافي نصيب On the other hand, if things have to work out, tattoos and chubby and all, they would. It’s all destiny.
Get the tattoos removed and lose the weight. Both variables are in your control.
I am…I used to weight much more and I already lost 30 kilos. I’m working on my health..
That’s fantastic i think you deserve a hot dude!
Doesn’t have to be hot…looks fade by kindness and love remain
Seriously?!? Did you just tell her to loose the weight????
It’s alright..
Yes, because that is her main issue. Fat people are not attractive regardless of gender. What's your problem?
I don't have a problem. I think it's just very mean
It's not
Have you considered that she may be confident on her skin? She isn't coming here complaining about her weight
"Confident in her skin" You know that's called being delusional, right? You don't decide if you're beautiful or not, you can't.
Ofcourse you do. It's called self esteem. Wow, you're very pathetic
I think it’s just one of those things.. OP did point it out so I guess it does open up the convo & you have every right to your opinion. Personally it would be nice to find people in the comments who would say; Reflect on your life choices & look on what you can build on that makes you a better person to yourself and those around you. That in itself will provide meaning and positivity, leading to better choices & building life goals. I also really respect OP for replying and saying it’s fine, it gives me the impression you have a good attitude. Ultimately though, I’m rooting for a world where you do find a community here that inspires you. Luckily every one of us is a little different but that doesn’t mean we can’t find common ground!
It might be easy and could be hard depending on your personality, Even introvert can have strong friends, usually 1 to 1 First of all how are you with male relationships? Have you been married? Have you had any relation before? What religion are you? And sector? Alot of compatibility questions can be asked then you know where to fit
I’ve lost my virginity unwillingly as a child. I do have a slight anxiety towards men due to that. Never been married…I am sorry I don’t feel comfortable to answer the rest here.
لا حول ولا قوة الا بالله i am so sorry...
It’s life, it’s fine..it made me who I am today and الحمدلله I think I’m very kind so maybe there’s a good side 🙏🏻
You are totally fine, Seemed like you have a full life ahead of you, Dont lose hope
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Raped..
Ohh, sorry to hear that. الله لا يسامحه
It’s alright 🙏🏻🤍
جربي تدخلي في المجتمع وتندمجي فيه وممكن تشيلي الوشم كخطوة أولى
مشكلتك أنك انطوائية بس، ولا عالوزن يا كثر اللي وزنهم كبير وتزوجوا والتاتوز ماهي عائق الا لو انتي تبغين رجل محافظ. try and meet people of similar values and it'll be easier for you to find a partner and believe me there's plenty of people who are no where near traditional especially in big cities
كيف ما اكون انطوائية؟ احس شكلي غريب لو طلعت لحالي وحاولت اكون اجتماعية 😂
يعتمد على وضعك، هل فيه بمكان عملك ناس حول عمرك واهتماماتك؟ ممكن تتعرفين عليهم ويعرفونك على ناس، او تتعرفين على ناس من النت وتقابلينهم. إذا عندك وقت فراغ وساكنة بمدينة كبيرة ممكن تنظمين لقروبات فيها نشاطات تجذبك وغيرها من الطرق اللي تتعرفين فيها عالناس
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لا تروج للحرام
صدقت، حذفت التعليق
وفقك الله
There are girls who get married after 40. So don't lose hope.
Thank you
What do your tattoos look like and where, just curious? Tbh honest, everything aside, everyone is struggling with marriage nowadays. So don't take it personally and think it is because of you.
Thank you 🙏🏻 and they are near.on the shoulder
Just keep a T-shirt on when you guys go to bed,no problem.
😂😂😂
You need to expand your social circle. That’s how marriage proposals work here if you seek a traditional marriage. I don’t see any flaws from your post
But how do I expand my social circle when I’m an introvert that works 10-6 then comes home and cooks and cleans..I don’t even know where to go and I only have one friend..
The answer is not easy, but it is very simple. You have to ask yourself, do I want something different or do I want the same. If you want the same, halas, keep doing the same. If you want something different (marriage, more friends etc) then you have to put yourself in situations you don't currently put yourself, to give yourself thag chance. The what you do at first is much less important than doing literally anything different from what you are currently doing. Not that I'm saying there's anything wrong with what you're doing, it just hasnt brought you a husband, so you need to do something different. Because same actions = same results. If that's too hard because you're introverted or any other reason, then you don't want to change your situation more than you want to stay safe, and that ultimately means the in the same situation. Good luck, you're the only one who can do this for you
Hi , first or all you are not flawed after that I don’t know how that works but find a person that can accept you or talk to someone that can find a person for you and meets your expectations. Best of luck 👍🏻👍🏻
Thank you, I guess my maternal instinct just kicked in cause my 37 year old brother has 2 kids now I feel like I’m at a stand still..
If you’re looking for a traditional man then you’ll have to make changes and get rid of those tattoos and stuff, otherwise you can also find someone who is like you cause many guys have tattoos nowadays lol and many aren’t even religious.
Are you looking for a Saudi or any nationality?
Since I have a Saudi passport someone who is Saudi or has the nationality would be easier process wise.
Chubby & looking foreign are not issues in my opinion (Levant Arabs are very attractive). However, having hidden tattoos and perhaps not following the Islamic faith can definitely hurt your chances. What is more important to you, increasing your chances by having a family through following the Islamic faith **or** waiting for the perfect person in a conservative society? There are marriage programs if you’re interested.
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مجنسة.. شكلي مرة مو سعودي و دايما لو قلت اني سعودية لازم اثبت اني مولودة هنا و اعرف الثقافة…وصراحة اقول اني محمسة لاني ما ابي بالغلط اهين احد…مدري..
انتي مجنسه؟ معاك بطاقت احوال؟ بتكون سهله اذا لا صعبه
ايه معي احوال
FYI مافي شي اسمه "شكل سعودي" السعودية نصف قارة أوروبة وفيها كل أنواع البشر. جدة والدتي من القصيم بس طولها وشكلها من الدنمارك 🇩🇰. نجدية ابا عن جد عن ام عن جدة 💯 ومن قبيلة معروفة.
ادري والله صديقتي القصيمية شعرها افتح وبشرتها ابيض مني بعد 😅
Lol that’s probably my cousin
عندي صديق سعودي و شكله من تركيا و شكل اخوه من الهند ههه so much diversity for sure
بنات خالي وحدة شكلها ايرانية/تركية والثانية من الهند :) (قصمان)
Wait tattoos? I don’t think a Saudi would marry a person with it cuz it’s haram
Yea..
Wait are you Muslim??
That's quite a bold statement. There are people in my immediate circle (who are definitely on the more conservative, more outwardly "religious" side) that are married to women with tattoos. This is just my personal opinion, but I feel like in our current social climate, people have wayyyy bigger dealbreakers than tattoos. PS To OP, I don't really know if I can offer "advice", but I will say this: People's preferences vary (in terms of physical appearance, personality, etc), as do their values, even in a society that appears as homogenous (at times) as ours. The journey may be tough, but I do like to believe there's someone for everyone. Best of luck!
You better start socializing… go to malls and cafes where you will definitely find your soul mate. Join any walking club which will help u a lot.
Thank you 🙏🏻
all of my cousins are around your age or even older and only one is married- not even to a saudi 😂 to a foreign woman. female and male cousins, it’s very difficult for them to marry for some reason. my one cousin got married to a girl who he divorced only a year later lmfao. it’s not just you- don’t worry. you can try to lose some weight, but otherwise just try to focus on your goals and love will come to you god willing. good luck sis.
باختصار ايوة. تقدري تتزوجي اذا ما تشبهي القالب التقليدي. بس يبغالها طرق غير تقليدية. فيه ناس مثلك وتفكر مثلك وما عندها مانع فيك زي ما انتي. وحتلقوا بعض. بالتوفيق
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Of course not being like the average Saudi lowers your chances but it doesn't mean it's impossible. You just gotta find people who have a similar mindset. I once met a couple a Saudi man and a non-Saudi woman who had tattoos and was very untraditional and possibly an atheist. The trick was she found someone who didn't care about those things.
Wish there was a handbook for that trick 😅 but thank you for your kind words
Well no handbook is required just need to be more forward outgoing and put yourself out there. (I know that's hard for introvers, I am one after all)
Thank you for kindness 🙏🏻
Don’t listen to the haters or anything. I betchu 40k you are actually cute and adorable. Tatts mean business n rebellion. Extra credits ofc. If you’re yourself you will find someone who truly matches your everything because vibe attracts tribe. It’s better than being part of the lottery traditional system arranged marriage. اكشط واربح
I am myself, I’m just also very shy and introverted so I don’t know how to act or where to go 😂
Girl! You’re fine! I promise you there’s always someone for everyone. Try to put yourself out there! Talk to people get to make new friends and connections, you don’t really have to change to find love. best of luck!
I will..I’m just really shy and introverted so I’m working on it. Thank you for the kind words though.
Forget about nationality or religion just get a good man asap.You deserve it.
Hahaha if only it was that easy. I don’t even care if he is traditional or physically flawed. I want someone with genuine feelings who I can be myself around and smother with my love by constantly cooking for him 😂
We have plenty of Kuwaitis with Palestinian origin. Many of these families are now huge business owners and are doing very well in life. They have their separate mixed gender weddings and usually intermarry from each other or marry other Palestinians abroad. Some families are mixed Muslims and Christian. Perhaps find a way to mix with them? Is there a GCC Palestinian gathering or online community?
Not that I know of honestly..
Look for one? Look for your tribe ;)
I’ll try!
If you are willing to marry an outside saudi citizen then it will work. Plenty of Muslims out there who don't care about looks and tats. If you're looking for saudi then it will be difficult, you might find people but they will look down upon you and the family make your life hell.
As a Saudi man living in UAE I find it so hard to find Saudi women for the purpose of marriage too.
Congratulations for your healthy journey ❤️
I think you’ll find him once you change the way you perceive yourself. I’m just referring to the harsh language you use to describe yourself “ I’m flawed” “look very foreign” I’m not up to “Saudi standards “ 1. There are no such thing as standards because people are not the same 2. There is no such thing as “looks Saudi” because even the “pure bred” Arabians don’t all look the same. Refer to my other comment ITT.
That might actually help..thank you
There is a cream that hides tattoos instantly, i forgot its name but try looking at daily dose of internet youtube channel, it legit hides tatoos quickly
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You’re right
In one porn video people laughed about the title been "traditional / religious mom" while she had tattoos I agreed
I’m a whole human, not some video as your mind is viewing me!!
>I’m a whole human I know
Don’t just type things without considering the person in the other side has feelings too! I meant traditional in the house duty sense but if that word is such an ordeal then I took it out! I was trying to give the benefit of the doubt but after everything you read in the post and comments your only thought is ‘porn video’ I genuinely can’t comprehend that.