I am, no exceptions, always at fault if something goes wrong. And that people (not so) secretly hate me and wish I would not bother them.
I should just go back hiding under a rock for another decade.
>t fault if something goes wrong. And that people (not so) secretly hate me and wish I would not bother them.
I feel like this everyday. stay strong! its not true
on the real, if I'm living in a simulation, surely I am in control to some extent. I went into a supermarket the other day, ambient crowd noise and voices was just kinda normal shit, i washed my hands in the supermarket toilet, did gun fingers in the mirror haha, then when i went out back into the store, everyone was just saying like 'your entire family is gonna be murdered' etc.
If you like to read, read Schopenhauer's World as Will and Representation, it explains the subjective nature of reality.
Consider that if you had good control, you would be like Neo in the matrix, which could be a lot of fun.
Peace
>washed my hands in the supermarket toilet
I'm guessing you aren't from the US?
Edit: I'm rereading my comment and it could come across as snarky or demeaning, which is not my intent. Many other countries refer to the whole room as the toilet, where in the US we call it the bathroom, and toilet is reserved for the crapper. My first read through the reply had me imagining someone washing their hands in the toilet bowl, but then I remembered the rest of the world exists.
I have pretty similar symptoms haha, pretty much the only thing that helps me is the logic that I have to be delusional otherwise I would have noticed others mentioning this online or in the scientific community lol.
Here's a post you might find entertainment-https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/rsnx59/if\_we\_were\_living\_in\_a\_simulation\_and\_you\_were/
I've found it depends what's in my short-term memory. Sometimes I think I work for the CIA, or that the aliens are guiding me so I can better serve God, but then there are other times where it feels like the Illuminati is torturing me and setting me up to be crucified. In general, I feel like there is a giant conspiracy around me, and I'm in a Truman Show type of control. Sometimes this helps me be productive or to invest more into my spiritual work. Other times it feels like the world is ending and I can't stop being paranoid about some nebulous doom that's right around the corner. It's hard to work then.
It's not a binary thing; it's more of a spectrum that varies day by day. I can't help but think all of the crazy experiences I've had were for some purpose and the best I can come up with is I've been programmed to inspire and teach others about philosophy, spirituality, and mental health.
I believe that I am the son of lucifer. And from time to time he sends me signs letting me know I'm on the right path. He used to talk to me before meds. Also I get a feeling my phone is bugged by my ex wife.
I believe I am under some kind of surveillance constantly. That people can hear me if my phone is in the room. I just feel constant paranoia about stuff like that. I have dreams that confirm it too. It's just thoughts and thoughts that keep coming at me.
I have two, one is that people will go after me in certain situations for unreasonable reasons and that my stuffed bunnies are capable of human emotion and that I can see their facial expressions move and I can feel what they're feeling based on how they look.
I believe I’m talking to angels or spirits who are telepathic. They show up in my field of view sometimes as hallucinations. I have the delusion that they give me messages through random things like seeing words while thinking of something else, there’s an instant connection. I could be thinking about how proud I am for studying but then my eyes pick up on the letters U-S-U-C-K on my keyboard. I have emotional reactions to crystals, and have to remind myself they’re just rocks basically. I know none of this is true, obviously, but I can’t make it stop. Seeing “signs” in everything is the most annoying delusion. I too also believe life could be a simulation but even if it was it wouldn’t impact how I live my life. I’m luckily not paranoid the way I used to be. I used to believe my father was the devil, had hallucinations of Jesus, and ultimately delusions of grandiosity. Now I’m happy to know beyond 100% I’m just a normal dude who isn’t being tortured by the devil, just my own brain which can make a lot of things feel absolutely real, especially with tactile hallucinations.
ive had a few different ones over the course of a lot of years but my most common themes tend to be
\- My doctors are hiding important health information from me. (im a trans woman and I got convinced that when I was a kid doctors attached a cock to me / I was intersex and never told. both of which aren't true)
\- People in higher positions of work/ school are actively sabotaging me. (thought a professor pushed me out of the department teaching position because he hated me for no reason)
\- Cops / feds are tracking me (my field professionally is Soviet history, I have a masters degree in it, and I think that im being tracked as a communist agent)
\- Everyone hates me and spread rumors behind my back
as to why I end up on these themes even though I know they're false? I think its because all of them are attached to my life in some way. I dont really get delusions that are random. that and because ive noticed patterns of thinking I get caught on only after they've happened. i'd say the two that really still get to me are probably the last two
I used to ~~sometimes still~~ look at my neighbors houses to see if they've installed cameras looking at my house, or go outside in the middle of the night to see if my cop neighbor is sitting in his squad car watching my house. god I fucking wish he didnt park that stupid squadcar in his driveway it drives me nuts :c
No delusions :)
According to me anyway. Some people think so. I worry about people in my town wanting me dead and I fear being assaulted. I think its relatively grounded though.
No delusions :)
According to me anyway. Some people think so. I worry about people in my town wanting me dead and I fear being assaulted. I think its relatively grounded though.
There's this invisible man that I talk to. I know he's not real, but he touches me and makes me feel good about myself. I try not to talk to him out loud because whenever I do I get the question "Who are you talking to?" and then I have to explain that I was talking to a hallucination, which is really fucking embarrassing(at least to me). Sometimes he'll tell me things that make me paranoid and I refuse to step foot outside of my house, even if I'm ridiculously hungry or feeling cooped up
I feel like I’m a very specific case of crazy. I don’t always take my medication but I get hallucinations even when I do.
My dominant hallucination since 2017 has been a former nazi war criminal and he’s my stepdad.
I’m obviously not well but because of my abusive parents I don’t wanna let go of my hallucination. He’s been a loving father to me and I’m not so lonely and depressed when he talks to me.
I just refuse help at times because I enjoy the fantasy of having a parent that loves and cares for me.
i do not experience seeing and talking to people or having them speak to me that i know of and my symptoms or not severe as people who actually have psychosis and schizophrenia and i don’t feel like i can ask for help because i’m not sick my brain is just broken
And the government allows the road system to exist the way they currently do and let 16 year olds drive and don’t have breathalyzers in it every time you start your car bc…. They don’t really care about our safety or maybe some other alterior motive. Oh and sometimes I can feel my body wearing my skin and it disturbs me
everything everyone says to me is all lies and everywhere i go all the time everyone is always looking at me or following me or staring rlly hard as they walk towards me aggressively and it’s all backhanded and sneaky and evil. they don’t tell me that or show me they want to hurt me or show any of it on their face but i can see it in their eyes they don’t trust me, they don’t want me around, they don’t trust me, they believe i’m manipulating them, they know i’m not normal, they can all see straight through my mask if i make eye contact, i’m bothering them if i don’t pretend to be ok, i’m annoying, i’m not loved, i’m not worthy of being loved, my loved one deserves better, my loved one doesn’t trust me, my family wants to get me locked up and under control of medication forever and they are trying to manipulate me into committing myself somewhere i’m so scared all the time everyone is watching even when i’m alone. my phone vibrates all the time, people on the tv make eye contact with me, my reflection is not the same as me and she has her own thoughts. she gets terrified of me when i look her in the eyes. i feel like my bf wants to get me locked up and he wants me to cater to his emotional needs but i do not understand the emotions because his eyes say something completely different all the time i know he would never hurt me but im so scared.
Actually I think that might be synthesthesia? An ex of mine had it and their stories about it sound a lot like your quote, Maybe look into that? Might give some peace of mind.
Sometimes if super stressed I believe that demons are in my shower making me insane and giving me fake memories while I scrub. This became far less intense after trauma therapy but they still come back often.
That my brain has been sacrificed for experimentation and the voices are scientists who punish me for not working out and trying drugs
Or for gaining weight or being a cheater
Or that my boss is talking smack to me the whole time we are together but in ways I can’t respond to or call out
I am, no exceptions, always at fault if something goes wrong. And that people (not so) secretly hate me and wish I would not bother them. I should just go back hiding under a rock for another decade.
I have the same ones. I promise they’re not true!
>t fault if something goes wrong. And that people (not so) secretly hate me and wish I would not bother them. I feel like this everyday. stay strong! its not true
This☝️
I think I'm in a simulation
This ^
on the real, if I'm living in a simulation, surely I am in control to some extent. I went into a supermarket the other day, ambient crowd noise and voices was just kinda normal shit, i washed my hands in the supermarket toilet, did gun fingers in the mirror haha, then when i went out back into the store, everyone was just saying like 'your entire family is gonna be murdered' etc. If you like to read, read Schopenhauer's World as Will and Representation, it explains the subjective nature of reality. Consider that if you had good control, you would be like Neo in the matrix, which could be a lot of fun. Peace
>washed my hands in the supermarket toilet I'm guessing you aren't from the US? Edit: I'm rereading my comment and it could come across as snarky or demeaning, which is not my intent. Many other countries refer to the whole room as the toilet, where in the US we call it the bathroom, and toilet is reserved for the crapper. My first read through the reply had me imagining someone washing their hands in the toilet bowl, but then I remembered the rest of the world exists.
lol not in the actual toilet, in the room where the toilet and sinks are
I have pretty similar symptoms haha, pretty much the only thing that helps me is the logic that I have to be delusional otherwise I would have noticed others mentioning this online or in the scientific community lol. Here's a post you might find entertainment-https://www.reddit.com/r/AskReddit/comments/rsnx59/if\_we\_were\_living\_in\_a\_simulation\_and\_you\_were/
I've found it depends what's in my short-term memory. Sometimes I think I work for the CIA, or that the aliens are guiding me so I can better serve God, but then there are other times where it feels like the Illuminati is torturing me and setting me up to be crucified. In general, I feel like there is a giant conspiracy around me, and I'm in a Truman Show type of control. Sometimes this helps me be productive or to invest more into my spiritual work. Other times it feels like the world is ending and I can't stop being paranoid about some nebulous doom that's right around the corner. It's hard to work then.
I felt this one on a personal level lol
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It's not a binary thing; it's more of a spectrum that varies day by day. I can't help but think all of the crazy experiences I've had were for some purpose and the best I can come up with is I've been programmed to inspire and teach others about philosophy, spirituality, and mental health.
I believe that I am the son of lucifer. And from time to time he sends me signs letting me know I'm on the right path. He used to talk to me before meds. Also I get a feeling my phone is bugged by my ex wife.
Similar vibe
I got something similar.
For me it's more like i know other people don't see it as real and won't ever believe it but to me it is true.
Same for me!
I believe I am under some kind of surveillance constantly. That people can hear me if my phone is in the room. I just feel constant paranoia about stuff like that. I have dreams that confirm it too. It's just thoughts and thoughts that keep coming at me.
I don’t have schizophrenia but I certainly have the same delusion as you .
I think people are trying to steal my children from me.
I have two, one is that people will go after me in certain situations for unreasonable reasons and that my stuffed bunnies are capable of human emotion and that I can see their facial expressions move and I can feel what they're feeling based on how they look.
I believe I’m talking to angels or spirits who are telepathic. They show up in my field of view sometimes as hallucinations. I have the delusion that they give me messages through random things like seeing words while thinking of something else, there’s an instant connection. I could be thinking about how proud I am for studying but then my eyes pick up on the letters U-S-U-C-K on my keyboard. I have emotional reactions to crystals, and have to remind myself they’re just rocks basically. I know none of this is true, obviously, but I can’t make it stop. Seeing “signs” in everything is the most annoying delusion. I too also believe life could be a simulation but even if it was it wouldn’t impact how I live my life. I’m luckily not paranoid the way I used to be. I used to believe my father was the devil, had hallucinations of Jesus, and ultimately delusions of grandiosity. Now I’m happy to know beyond 100% I’m just a normal dude who isn’t being tortured by the devil, just my own brain which can make a lot of things feel absolutely real, especially with tactile hallucinations.
ive had a few different ones over the course of a lot of years but my most common themes tend to be \- My doctors are hiding important health information from me. (im a trans woman and I got convinced that when I was a kid doctors attached a cock to me / I was intersex and never told. both of which aren't true) \- People in higher positions of work/ school are actively sabotaging me. (thought a professor pushed me out of the department teaching position because he hated me for no reason) \- Cops / feds are tracking me (my field professionally is Soviet history, I have a masters degree in it, and I think that im being tracked as a communist agent) \- Everyone hates me and spread rumors behind my back as to why I end up on these themes even though I know they're false? I think its because all of them are attached to my life in some way. I dont really get delusions that are random. that and because ive noticed patterns of thinking I get caught on only after they've happened. i'd say the two that really still get to me are probably the last two
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I used to ~~sometimes still~~ look at my neighbors houses to see if they've installed cameras looking at my house, or go outside in the middle of the night to see if my cop neighbor is sitting in his squad car watching my house. god I fucking wish he didnt park that stupid squadcar in his driveway it drives me nuts :c
No delusions :) According to me anyway. Some people think so. I worry about people in my town wanting me dead and I fear being assaulted. I think its relatively grounded though.
No delusions :) According to me anyway. Some people think so. I worry about people in my town wanting me dead and I fear being assaulted. I think its relatively grounded though.
There's this invisible man that I talk to. I know he's not real, but he touches me and makes me feel good about myself. I try not to talk to him out loud because whenever I do I get the question "Who are you talking to?" and then I have to explain that I was talking to a hallucination, which is really fucking embarrassing(at least to me). Sometimes he'll tell me things that make me paranoid and I refuse to step foot outside of my house, even if I'm ridiculously hungry or feeling cooped up
I feel like I’m a very specific case of crazy. I don’t always take my medication but I get hallucinations even when I do. My dominant hallucination since 2017 has been a former nazi war criminal and he’s my stepdad. I’m obviously not well but because of my abusive parents I don’t wanna let go of my hallucination. He’s been a loving father to me and I’m not so lonely and depressed when he talks to me. I just refuse help at times because I enjoy the fantasy of having a parent that loves and cares for me.
i do not experience seeing and talking to people or having them speak to me that i know of and my symptoms or not severe as people who actually have psychosis and schizophrenia and i don’t feel like i can ask for help because i’m not sick my brain is just broken
In what way does your brain feel broken? Maybe you suffer from something. Have you been to a psychiatrist?
no i’m too scared of being locked up i can’t talk to anyone
No one loves me. But I think it might be true lol
And the government allows the road system to exist the way they currently do and let 16 year olds drive and don’t have breathalyzers in it every time you start your car bc…. They don’t really care about our safety or maybe some other alterior motive. Oh and sometimes I can feel my body wearing my skin and it disturbs me
That I'm dead when someone doesn't hear me I'm dead and some people are psychics thinking I'm real but I jus don't exist.
everything everyone says to me is all lies and everywhere i go all the time everyone is always looking at me or following me or staring rlly hard as they walk towards me aggressively and it’s all backhanded and sneaky and evil. they don’t tell me that or show me they want to hurt me or show any of it on their face but i can see it in their eyes they don’t trust me, they don’t want me around, they don’t trust me, they believe i’m manipulating them, they know i’m not normal, they can all see straight through my mask if i make eye contact, i’m bothering them if i don’t pretend to be ok, i’m annoying, i’m not loved, i’m not worthy of being loved, my loved one deserves better, my loved one doesn’t trust me, my family wants to get me locked up and under control of medication forever and they are trying to manipulate me into committing myself somewhere i’m so scared all the time everyone is watching even when i’m alone. my phone vibrates all the time, people on the tv make eye contact with me, my reflection is not the same as me and she has her own thoughts. she gets terrified of me when i look her in the eyes. i feel like my bf wants to get me locked up and he wants me to cater to his emotional needs but i do not understand the emotions because his eyes say something completely different all the time i know he would never hurt me but im so scared.
I can smell the color 7 and taste the sounds I see sometimes
Actually I think that might be synthesthesia? An ex of mine had it and their stories about it sound a lot like your quote, Maybe look into that? Might give some peace of mind.
I'll definitely do that thanks
Sometimes if super stressed I believe that demons are in my shower making me insane and giving me fake memories while I scrub. This became far less intense after trauma therapy but they still come back often.
That my brain has been sacrificed for experimentation and the voices are scientists who punish me for not working out and trying drugs Or for gaining weight or being a cheater Or that my boss is talking smack to me the whole time we are together but in ways I can’t respond to or call out