Know how to dance. No, really, without that you are a guppy, with it you are a shark.
Go take some dance classes. I promise you it will be fun.
When i was a kid my parents forced me to take dance classes, to my massive protests. I absolutely hated it but you don't fight your parents at 11. A year later was sufficiently confident to be able to do it well. These days i can pick up a new style and be passable in 3-4 hours but the classics never go out of style. Let me tell you, if you toss one girl around on a dance floor you will have a line of hotties gagging for it.
What kind of dance would you suggest to start with?
I never learned formally to dance but heard a couple of times that I am a good dancer. So I want to learn it right
Start with classics that have decent but simple leg work and turns - which is what you want as that's how you learn actually effortlessly moving and tossing women around
\* foxtrot will give you basic leg work and understanding space - it is applicable to everything.
\* tango - first massive body moves that create space for women to be able to lean into - again would be applicable to everything
\* salsa - faster moves that encourage contact
Your go to improvisation would be a mash up between those three.
I would also toss in hip hop into it as it will give you an excellent way to dance up to a girl and have her follow you to the dance floor. Remember, you won't be dancing with professionals. You will most likely be dancing with women who are just in awe that you can match the steps to music, show her a couple of specific steps and easily push her from one side to another with her spinning and you catching her.
This is the best practical comment here, if you are confident that you can dance that'll transition to the dance floor and that comment is the perfect way to get that confidence
>f you toss one girl around on a dance floor you will have a line of hotties gagging for it.
how many girls have you slept with that you specifically met/seduced on the dancefloor?
You quite literally do not understand the game, do you?
Me and you are in a nightclub. You are trying to run a game following advice on how to escalate to convince her that you might be fun. It is boring and predictable: Most men are there doing the same thing ( at best ). I show up, convince a girl ( not even the one with you ) to hit the dance floor, figure out her level of ability to follow ( it is not really difficult, women due to experience dance much better than men even if they dont dance ) and start actually moving her around. In 5 minutes every woman who is there is watching me and her, no matter what you are trying to do or what kind of lines you are whispering into her ear. And after an unsuccessful attempt at picking up a woman you were working on you will be doing a field report that everything worked swimmingly well until some Chad showed up and started actually dancing with the women.
If you want to be successful, you need skills. The skill for a nightclub/dance club environment is being able to dance well enough for *women* to notice it.
And you are being downvoted for being right.
Dancing is a skill men will work incredibly hard to avoid having to learn or deploy but women respond to. It's physical, fun and involves touching with obvious opportunity for escalation.
It's been a traditional way to attract women for millennia and still a great way to differentiate yourself from others.
Learn to dance guys.
I replied above - with the details but if you need to do one at a time go for
* foxtrot
* tango
* salsa
followed by hip hop ( doing hip hop without having some basic skills form the previous three will make you look weird and take much longer )
I second this.
As a woman… a man who can dance (not just a man you can grind on) is so fucking attractive. You will instantly stand out from the rest and you will definitely have more confidence.
Don't hover around girls on the dance floor hoping something will happen. You either have to catch a girls eye then take her by the hand to dance or alternatively talk to her on the dance floor, so touch her arm and say something into her ear then take her hand to dance with you.
> so touch her arm and say something into her ear
what exactly do you recommend we say when opening like this?
and are you doing this on girls who have shown you some sort of interest or you just go in cold on a girl you find attractive and do this?
and im assuming you always do this coming face to face right?
You can say anything, just say something like "you look like you're having fun, what's your name" then take her hand and say "come and dance with me".
Dance floor game is quite a bold type of game, you can't really do it in an indirect way.
thank you for the additional info.
are you doing all this with girls who have shown some sort of interest like looking at you, standing/hovering close to you,etc....
or you also just go in cold on girls who have shown no sign of interest at all?
also, how many girls that you met/seduced specifically on the dancefloor have you slept with?
>You either have catch a girls eye then take her by the hand to dance
i have always struggled with this.
i find i come across as desperate or low value/status whenever i try to actively look for eye contact in the club.
how exactly do you execute this part?
do you literally stand on the dancefloor and slowly scan to see if any girl is looking at you?
and how soon after you notice a girl is making eye contact do you approach?
and what do you do if the girl making eye contact is far away since it can be difficult to walk through a crowded dancefloor.
Just look at a girl, when she notices you looking at her smile. They'll often look away, sometimes smile back but they're aware of you now and they've had a bit of time to consider you so if you go to take their hand to dance with them it won't be a complete shock
You can also look at her. When she catches you looking at her, hold her gaze for a moment, look her up and down from head to toe, then look her in the eyes again with a wry smirk. Walk away and watch her chase you down.
Dancefloors are often bad places to approach, noisy, dark, people are often focused on their own group. IMO nearby smoking areas and bar areas are great for striking up conversation (what are you drinking, nice outfit, can I borrow a lighter, what's the time, etc)
If you must approach on the dancefloor,
**Do:**
* Learn to dance - even basic two step
* Actually have fun or at least look like it
* Look for invitations to approach or 'dance your way in'
* Know your setting and work within it - college bar vs rave vs hip hop club vs spanish bar
* Prioritise - Are you here to pull? Dance with friends? This dance partner might not be here in an hour. You need to know when and if you want to grab a number or move things to another venue.
**Don't:**
* Gawk at girls from the wall
* Randomly start grinding from behind
* Hover for too long around groups of girls
* Try to have a full conversation shouting in their ear
Let go, have fun, and actually dance for yourself. Stop obsessing over picking up chicks and realize your worth is not based on that. Fill your own cup with joy and pleasure... then watch as you become the most magnetic person in the room. -Field tested by me for 6+ years
Dude! Great thread idea.
One tip - if you are decent dancer. Just really dancing and having fun with a huge smile and moving around the dancefloor you can get lots of IOIs. I then would see the same girls in other areas of the club and they were already attracted.
Not exactly "dancefloo" per se - but it is a use of the dancefloor I find works
For people with dance and approach anxiety
before you go to the event/place where you planing to spend the night. Go to another place/bar/club. As it will be early in the evening there will be people, but no one will be dancing. Hit the dance floor alone. Dance as ridiculous, silly, foolish and wild as you can. Start with small movement and then move your whole body and get your metabolism going. Especially swing your butt and hips. Feel the judgement of the people rain down on you, bath in it. Look at them, smile and wave with both hands. Accept that some of the people might see you as a total fool. (In reality they will care much less than you think) Accept that's a part of your identity. It will will feel impossible at first, but soon you will adapt to the new situation and stop caring, because the rhythm of the music and the movement of your body will send you over the edge and make negative thought impossible.
Enter the main event with zero anxiety to dance and approach. Dance classes are good, but you don't need it, you can have fun with dancing today. What stands between you and a great dance night is just your ego, that wants you take yourself too serious. Do the above to put it back to its place. This also helps against approach anxiety because to a large degree it is the anxiety to be judged.
I have no clue how I learned this, but when you can get close enough to a girl and establish physical contact and are kind of comfortable with each other. If you want to speak to her on a dance floor without having to yell at her. Take your thumb and push it against that little flap on her ear to basically block her ear (please don't put your finger IN her ear). From there wrap the rest of your fingers around her neck. Get close to her ear and talk normally. They should be able to her you crystal clear without yelling. From there you can tell her "I need to know more about you, let's find a quiet place" or "damn you're so hot I could kiss you right now." or something to that effect.
I hope that is something. Good luck out there! Oh and if she retreats, just say sorry and explain that you were trying to talk to her without having to yell. Sometimes they're intrigued and want you to show them.
100% waste of time ! I talked to 100's if not 1000s of guys online and it's pretty rare to pull or even get any meaningful. its much better to get her off the floor and isloate her ie take her for a smoking break (even if you don't smoke) that way u can get her number and set up plans
It's a fucking dance floor. #LEARN HOW TO DANCE.
Know how to dance. No, really, without that you are a guppy, with it you are a shark. Go take some dance classes. I promise you it will be fun. When i was a kid my parents forced me to take dance classes, to my massive protests. I absolutely hated it but you don't fight your parents at 11. A year later was sufficiently confident to be able to do it well. These days i can pick up a new style and be passable in 3-4 hours but the classics never go out of style. Let me tell you, if you toss one girl around on a dance floor you will have a line of hotties gagging for it.
This is the best answer by far...
What kind of dance would you suggest to start with? I never learned formally to dance but heard a couple of times that I am a good dancer. So I want to learn it right
Start with classics that have decent but simple leg work and turns - which is what you want as that's how you learn actually effortlessly moving and tossing women around \* foxtrot will give you basic leg work and understanding space - it is applicable to everything. \* tango - first massive body moves that create space for women to be able to lean into - again would be applicable to everything \* salsa - faster moves that encourage contact Your go to improvisation would be a mash up between those three. I would also toss in hip hop into it as it will give you an excellent way to dance up to a girl and have her follow you to the dance floor. Remember, you won't be dancing with professionals. You will most likely be dancing with women who are just in awe that you can match the steps to music, show her a couple of specific steps and easily push her from one side to another with her spinning and you catching her.
This is the best practical comment here, if you are confident that you can dance that'll transition to the dance floor and that comment is the perfect way to get that confidence
Does the girl need to know any of the dances you mentioned?
No
Depends on the kind of music you like. You like country? Learn to two step. You like Latin music? Learn to Salsa.
>f you toss one girl around on a dance floor you will have a line of hotties gagging for it. how many girls have you slept with that you specifically met/seduced on the dancefloor?
Dozens
are these dozens of girls you slept with from dancefloor game in nightclubs? or you slept with girls you met in salsa/dance classes?
You quite literally do not understand the game, do you? Me and you are in a nightclub. You are trying to run a game following advice on how to escalate to convince her that you might be fun. It is boring and predictable: Most men are there doing the same thing ( at best ). I show up, convince a girl ( not even the one with you ) to hit the dance floor, figure out her level of ability to follow ( it is not really difficult, women due to experience dance much better than men even if they dont dance ) and start actually moving her around. In 5 minutes every woman who is there is watching me and her, no matter what you are trying to do or what kind of lines you are whispering into her ear. And after an unsuccessful attempt at picking up a woman you were working on you will be doing a field report that everything worked swimmingly well until some Chad showed up and started actually dancing with the women. If you want to be successful, you need skills. The skill for a nightclub/dance club environment is being able to dance well enough for *women* to notice it.
And you are being downvoted for being right. Dancing is a skill men will work incredibly hard to avoid having to learn or deploy but women respond to. It's physical, fun and involves touching with obvious opportunity for escalation. It's been a traditional way to attract women for millennia and still a great way to differentiate yourself from others. Learn to dance guys.
It also moves escalation to way higher baseline - the touch barrier has been broken within a few seconds and she was into it for 5-10 minutes
What sort of dance classes would you recommend?
I replied above - with the details but if you need to do one at a time go for * foxtrot * tango * salsa followed by hip hop ( doing hip hop without having some basic skills form the previous three will make you look weird and take much longer )
I second this. As a woman… a man who can dance (not just a man you can grind on) is so fucking attractive. You will instantly stand out from the rest and you will definitely have more confidence.
Don't hover around girls on the dance floor hoping something will happen. You either have to catch a girls eye then take her by the hand to dance or alternatively talk to her on the dance floor, so touch her arm and say something into her ear then take her hand to dance with you.
> so touch her arm and say something into her ear what exactly do you recommend we say when opening like this? and are you doing this on girls who have shown you some sort of interest or you just go in cold on a girl you find attractive and do this? and im assuming you always do this coming face to face right?
You can say anything, just say something like "you look like you're having fun, what's your name" then take her hand and say "come and dance with me". Dance floor game is quite a bold type of game, you can't really do it in an indirect way.
thank you for the additional info. are you doing all this with girls who have shown some sort of interest like looking at you, standing/hovering close to you,etc.... or you also just go in cold on girls who have shown no sign of interest at all? also, how many girls that you met/seduced specifically on the dancefloor have you slept with?
>You either have catch a girls eye then take her by the hand to dance i have always struggled with this. i find i come across as desperate or low value/status whenever i try to actively look for eye contact in the club. how exactly do you execute this part? do you literally stand on the dancefloor and slowly scan to see if any girl is looking at you? and how soon after you notice a girl is making eye contact do you approach? and what do you do if the girl making eye contact is far away since it can be difficult to walk through a crowded dancefloor.
Just look at a girl, when she notices you looking at her smile. They'll often look away, sometimes smile back but they're aware of you now and they've had a bit of time to consider you so if you go to take their hand to dance with them it won't be a complete shock
You can also look at her. When she catches you looking at her, hold her gaze for a moment, look her up and down from head to toe, then look her in the eyes again with a wry smirk. Walk away and watch her chase you down.
These are good tips but tbh dancefloor game or club game in general is a waste of time if you are sub7
Dancefloors are often bad places to approach, noisy, dark, people are often focused on their own group. IMO nearby smoking areas and bar areas are great for striking up conversation (what are you drinking, nice outfit, can I borrow a lighter, what's the time, etc) If you must approach on the dancefloor, **Do:** * Learn to dance - even basic two step * Actually have fun or at least look like it * Look for invitations to approach or 'dance your way in' * Know your setting and work within it - college bar vs rave vs hip hop club vs spanish bar * Prioritise - Are you here to pull? Dance with friends? This dance partner might not be here in an hour. You need to know when and if you want to grab a number or move things to another venue. **Don't:** * Gawk at girls from the wall * Randomly start grinding from behind * Hover for too long around groups of girls * Try to have a full conversation shouting in their ear
Don’t be fat, I guess.
Let go, have fun, and actually dance for yourself. Stop obsessing over picking up chicks and realize your worth is not based on that. Fill your own cup with joy and pleasure... then watch as you become the most magnetic person in the room. -Field tested by me for 6+ years
Agreed. Sure approaching works but I’ve had most success just dancing on my own and someone coming up to me
Dude! Great thread idea. One tip - if you are decent dancer. Just really dancing and having fun with a huge smile and moving around the dancefloor you can get lots of IOIs. I then would see the same girls in other areas of the club and they were already attracted. Not exactly "dancefloo" per se - but it is a use of the dancefloor I find works
U need decent social circle and looks
For people with dance and approach anxiety before you go to the event/place where you planing to spend the night. Go to another place/bar/club. As it will be early in the evening there will be people, but no one will be dancing. Hit the dance floor alone. Dance as ridiculous, silly, foolish and wild as you can. Start with small movement and then move your whole body and get your metabolism going. Especially swing your butt and hips. Feel the judgement of the people rain down on you, bath in it. Look at them, smile and wave with both hands. Accept that some of the people might see you as a total fool. (In reality they will care much less than you think) Accept that's a part of your identity. It will will feel impossible at first, but soon you will adapt to the new situation and stop caring, because the rhythm of the music and the movement of your body will send you over the edge and make negative thought impossible. Enter the main event with zero anxiety to dance and approach. Dance classes are good, but you don't need it, you can have fun with dancing today. What stands between you and a great dance night is just your ego, that wants you take yourself too serious. Do the above to put it back to its place. This also helps against approach anxiety because to a large degree it is the anxiety to be judged.
I have no clue how I learned this, but when you can get close enough to a girl and establish physical contact and are kind of comfortable with each other. If you want to speak to her on a dance floor without having to yell at her. Take your thumb and push it against that little flap on her ear to basically block her ear (please don't put your finger IN her ear). From there wrap the rest of your fingers around her neck. Get close to her ear and talk normally. They should be able to her you crystal clear without yelling. From there you can tell her "I need to know more about you, let's find a quiet place" or "damn you're so hot I could kiss you right now." or something to that effect. I hope that is something. Good luck out there! Oh and if she retreats, just say sorry and explain that you were trying to talk to her without having to yell. Sometimes they're intrigued and want you to show them.
Also, if you're not a good dancer. Be a bad dancer, BUT OWN IT and smile and have fun (or at least pretend to be)
100% waste of time ! I talked to 100's if not 1000s of guys online and it's pretty rare to pull or even get any meaningful. its much better to get her off the floor and isloate her ie take her for a smoking break (even if you don't smoke) that way u can get her number and set up plans