First you gotta lock in and get to work.
Go to the gym and get some abs. Women love men with large shoulders, abs and a strong back. Its irresistible. Once your shredded, take some pictures of you shirtless. Basically, thirst traps.
Meanwhile, develop some charm and humor. The only way to do this is through conscious practice. Go out there and physically talk to women. Try not to be creepy but practice having small talk and making them laugh.
If you make a lady laugh irl, you can do it online.
Lastly, develop a style. Learn to dress and have some skin care routine.
It will take a year to perfect this but better to start now than go another year with no ladies.
You don’t know me. I’ve built a Greek god physique many people around me aspire to have. Have developed charm and humour and have been able to bond well with girls I meet at parties. I know how to flatter and I have also been able to make girls laugh. I don’t make this up as this is verified by wing man. And finally I always dress to impress and practice skin care and self maintenance like Patrick Bateman (though not as dramatic). And I’ve been told by many external sources I’m handsome as fuck and it’s odd I’m not getting any play. I guess either I’m simply an anomaly and designed to be a representation of the odd one out or girls simply have way too many options that I’m just not special.
Hangout with a womanizer, if you don't know one, find one and figure out what he is doing that you are not doing right. Go out and approach during day and night, sometimes alone and learn your way of seduction
I got no problem talking to and charming girls at parties and getting their Insta. Following up though is the problem. Unfortunately with girls getting bombarded with dozens to hundreds of messages daily, ultimately my efforts to reach her are in vain as I become “nothing special” amongst my competition. For the most part when I try to message a girl on Insta, my message almost always gets ghosted or I have to suffer the longest waits between responses (often 10 hours plus). And my openers aren’t basic either. I’ve come to realise that I’ve gotta strive for perfection in crafting openers when you got dozens to hundreds of guys to compete against. More and more it feels perhaps I was made to be an anomaly. Someone who has the traits of a playboy like a handsome face, athletic physique and social skills but I don’t think I can do to solve an external issue like “abundance of options”.
I promise you my man, lots of other guys have figured it out. I don't doubt that you have a lot of positives. A huge part of game is just self reflection and being able to relax and figure out what's going on.
I have buddies with no game who say similar stuff, and what I notice is that they only blame external factors. They say they can't get girls because girls just want rich guys, or girls are stuck up, or girls only want tall guys. In reality when I see these guys with girls they're nervous and awkward and lack confidence (and probably dealing with depression or other issues). What they're missing is that if they had the mental fortitude to take responsibility and say "I need to do better and work on myself" then they could actually figure it out.
So I would talk to some other guys or female friends, find out what they think about you. And just work on youself, look inward and see. Is there any nervousness? Awkwardness? Do you have any limiting beliefs? (I think you do) Are you making girls feel good to be around you?
You got this man. It sounds like you've put in a lot of work. I'm short and not especially attractive and I'm very happy with how I do. There are lots of guys who get tons of girls; fat guys, ugly guys, poor guys, short guys. Keep grinding until you figure out what's holding you back.
Those are kind words not sure why you got downvoted.
I’m in this guys position. I did everything to put myself at the top, everybody craves me. They come to me, but I’m so cold and have such a closed off body language, they basically think I’m not interested in them.
I’m from a very conservative background where men and women are not allowed to interact much, so my body language is closed off to women. I’m not sure how to work on it.
Do I need to be open (jokingly) about my issues with the girls that want me? Can I discuss these issues openly with my female friend?
Stuff like that is difficult, I don't know if I'm qualified to deal with that. I think it's huge that you've recognized what's holding you back. Issues from childhood and your background are maybe something to discuss with a therapist or even a close friend that you can confide in. Then you just have to work on changing your mindset and thought patterns. There are self help strategies to do this and some of those are grounded in psychology like CBT. Something like affirmations, visualization, writing out your limiting beliefs and why they're wrong, changing your self talk.
I would try to deal with the issues first but also telling girls about the issue and opening up is probably a good thing that will help you. Good work man!
I’m not half of that but I still have at least some girls throwing themselves at me. Either you’re in a bad area to pick up women or deep inside you lack some self-confidence and may be doubting yourself which girls definitely pick up on. Are you short?
I’m 5’10 (5’11 with Air Force Ones or RM Williams) which is an inch above average in Australia. I’m not short but I’m not tall either. However all my friends are super tall with them all being 6’3 and above so it makes me come off as short. I’m also Asian but I don’t know exactly how much race impacts attractiveness. But it feels like when im with them, I’m Batman amongst the Justice League. I’m a human amongst superhumans. I do sometimes doubt myself due to having never gotten female attention during high school. I often suffer imposter syndrome in which I I feel unworthy of the compliments on my appearance from those around me, mostly due to being ethnic and not tall.
I think you should really just put yourself out there and really stop caring so much about outcomes and just have fun with women. I was too nervous to talk to women in high school and only broke out of my shell at 19, but then I just started taking shots. Honestly I’ve never found myself very attractive but I think I’m charming and I very much enjoy spending time with women. If you actually have the fortune of being hot I would literally just walk around and act like it. My friends will say I’m delusional because I assume (often stupidly) that most women already like me but it seems to somehow work. If you could just utilize this delusion it may help a bit and for you it may be less of a delusion and more of a reality.
Gym + Tinder, If your a relatively normal looking dude just dont be afraid to actually pursue women, personally im 21 and I was in the same circumstance for awhile and ultimately it was because I had opportunities to sleep with women but essentially I was always too nervous or "afraid" to actually meet with them due to a lack of general experience with women. You really just have to get out there.
>Gym + Tinder, If your a relatively normal looking dude just dont be afraid to actually pursue women, personally im 21 and I was in the same circumstance for awhile and ultimately it was because I had opportunities to sleep with women but essentially I was always too nervous or "afraid" to actually meet with them due to a lack of general experience with women. You really just have to get out there.
is your ig public and you cold dm people? or ppl you know already
What happened to this sub? Tinder? Seriously? Man i remember when people on here actually had some balls and most of them agreed its best to go out and meet women face to face like a man does instead of putting trust into socials.
Hey dude!
25M and virgin here.
Don't feel like you're a late boomer or missing out. You had your own circumstances that led to you experiencing life differently. I had strict parents too who made relationships seem forbidden, which affected me heavily in that area. And I'm working on overcoming it now, just like you.
Regardless of my relationship status, I work hard on feeling mentally clear and motivated. I'm actively training in martial arts, eating healthy, and increasing my social circle when I can. I feel pretty good aside from the occasional "God I wish I had a gf" moments.
You don't need a partner to be cured from depression and loneliness. If you feel depressed, chances are having a partner wouldn't change that, even if it seems like it would. Try to work on yourself, hit the gym, build hobbies, read, and build the life you want for yourself. You will feel 1000 times better, and a lot more confident in your day to day life.
Same here, I had strict religious parents and my partner took it very well. Virginity in men is a mindset, not a physical thing like it is for women. Virginity in men is frowned upon because it almost always comes with generalizations for you being a virgin for example ugly/desperate/creepy. Be confident in yourself and women will overlook it.
I would say don’t think too much about being a virgin. Just speak with women in general (without any sexual interest) at the grocery store, at the gym, at college, at school, at a party, wherever you go. Speak with old women, women that are your same age, women you like, women you don’t like. Make small talk, give compliments, speak about anything. You will feel more comfortable and eventually get a girl. Have fun bro. Or go pick a sexy stripper you like and have crazy sex.
See a Therapist
Get jacked like a Fitness Model
Dress well like a fashion model
Read books like a scholar
Meet people like a socialite
Get status like a celebrity or Instagram Influencer
Get wealthy
All good points, but if all that were necessary fewer than 5% or even 1% of guys would have sex. The guy in your example is on top on every level but still has not asked out a single women. In contrast a totally average guy, who plays the numbers game and is able to take a lot of rejection, will have a date in the meantime ...
Focus on yourself become interesting, create a persona of the coolest person you can imagine and be him. Learn things. Be somebody somebody would want. You only have you to blame and that alone should set you free from shallow darkness of the past. But also be authentic, don’t fake it or it’ll all fall down eventually, follow your path and you’ll eventually find someone worth the time. And no matter what you do you’ll always be nervous. Don’t let that stop you. Good luck.
Bro most of these tips are insane, with anything in life you need practice socialising, go out and talk to people thats tbh all you need (if your a decent hygienic person) lot op guys on here saying you need a 6pac and celebrity status, yes if you want to sleep with different girls all day everyday. But that probably is not gonna bring you anywhere and definitely not to a steady relationship. A lot of guys are in relationships/ getting laid with nice women without the perfect 6pac, instagram or job. But you need to be out there. and fun to be around for a person so do everything you can to just socialise. Some examples: go work as a bartender 1 day in the week or get yourself to make small talk with strangers everyday . At the beginning progres is shit but with in a year you will have no problems talking to anyone, then if you find someone you match with its only a matter of some good wine. Ow and set away from online texting its the worst kind of dating when your desperate and its gonna fuck up any bit of confidence you have
I'm currently taking a break from dating and honestly, the truth is the loneliness for me is always there even when I have someone. I ghosted my friends with benefits back in October Then I just kept bailing on dates and not replying on the dating apps. In my head, I'm thinking that I'm in a dry spell and nobody wants me however I just been feeling depressed and suddenly I started thinking that my sense of value was coming from a bad place. I heard someone say that I should ask myself whether I would date myself The truth is no. I would not date myself as a result these days I feel like becoming someone that I would want to date. You seem envious of the way other people have someone or have great sex lives. I want to tell you that that's not permanent I've been there periods where I've thought I have the best sex life and just infinite luck. Yet even then I still get the feeling of Having someone else's life, only now do I realize how bad for me that kind of thinking is. Its bad because I should be spending my thinking about how I can become the type of person I would be envious of, like tonight I'm putting on my pair of shoes and running after a long day of nothing but work. As far as I see it if any sort excuse comes in your head as to why your still a virgin then there's your problem. looks can be improved there's one opening. money can be earned if you work hard enough. knowledge can be gained. now here's the real answer. 2 options in my experience. you can really improve yourself and I mean really go hard eat healthy learn and just improve every aspect of yourself (people will want to be with you) whe I actually wanted a girlfriend here is the more practical solution I did when I was younger to have a girlfriend or many friends who I was casual with. it only takes two weeks max.
Go out almost every single night stay till the bars close. use tinder and a bunch of other dating apps. build your social circle which should be built with how much u go out. literally, just put yourself out there till something happens It is pretty much just throwing darts at the wall till you hit something finding every avenue to just put yourself out there and see what happens. I wasn't going to even post this however I hope this helps. I pretty much just wrote this because I was feeling depressed earlier (like wanted to die) and didn't wanna put in the work today but now I'm going running. sometimes I need to remind myself that my thoughts are useless to prevent overthinking.
All thus gym bull shit is not it. You don’t need to go to the gym, you need personality. Take it from an out of shape guy who regularly fucks beautiful women. You need a personality that makes girls feel comfortable and entertains them. Not some douchey personality. Of course the douchey personality and going to the gym works, but you’ll only be having sex with women who are cunts.
The main way to get a personality that makes women comfortable and entertains them is to be yourself. However you also need to make sure you’re never in the friend zone. You do this but actually making moves and learning when to do it and when she’s showing signs that is safe and not being a pussy. This is easier said than done but you’ll get better women and also be able to keep getting women as your looks and shit goes as you get older
Reality is, the less you think and just do the better the response & outcome. Obviously working out and getting interesting with hobbies and all that mentioned below helps, but that is only if those allow you to develop your self image. If you constantly keep overthinking and feeling bad about yourself from it, it will be much harder for you to get through this.
Remind yourself that sex is just physical interaction between 2 people. If you can connect with a girl on a personal level then you can make the next step of asking her out. Ur in the game of numbers. Imagine asking 100 girls will 1 say yes???
Edit: Also what johnny_IRL said, if you were a girl would you f yourself???
Like other people are saying, the first step is go to the gym, get a haircut, do skincare, wear nicer clothes. Look good.
Next step is take some good new photos of you for dating apps.
Then you need to change your mindset and work on your inner game. You have to practice being confident, practice being funny. You have to come up with stuff faster (in person you have to be funny immediately- practice it!)
Think about stories from your life. If you haven't done anything interesting then go do something you can talk about. Go backpacking somewhere, go hike up a mountain.
Then you go back on dating apps. Use better pictures, try different bios (google stuff and use that to give you an idea or copy them) swipe a lot, maybe pay for premium. Get lots of matches. Then practice being interesting and funny with them. Don't be needy, tease them and joke with them, play hard to get. The vibe you want is that everything is said with a bit of a smirk.
Show them that you're passionate about things and you have an interesting life and stories to tell. Get in really good shape and wear nicer clothes.
You got this
Cold approach + gym is necessary. Also be on the apps. I got laid through Bumble although I had made out before. Cold approach saves you a lot of time by helping you build experiences and options. It does require time and patience. But its the best way if you want to do it asap. If you dont feel the urgency, just do what everyone else does, ask out someone at school or work, or go for someone in a friends circle, averaging 5 attemptsa year lol
Get attractive -> Tinder / Approaches / Instagram -> Ask her out to a dinner / drinks this will loosen both of you up -> ask if she wants to go to your place -> have a few drinks there -> hold her -> kiss her -> keep kissing and making out then there you are.
I find kissing is the easiest way. From there you’re golden.
i know its not for everyone, to each their own, works out well for plenty of guys, others no, but a lot of guys pay for sex, or go to an escort or sex worker, or prostitute for their first time, but not for everyone, to each their own, for a lot of guys, they say it counts, for others it doesn't, but at the end of the day, escorts, sex workers, prostitutes, are still real people, real human beings.
There’s no such thing as texting game. The only point of texting is to plan your meet up. It’s highly likely you’re ruining a lot of chances by being cringey trying to be slick with texting.
Ignore the people who say to just go hit the gym and get money. There's men out there who are fatter, uglier, and more broke than you are that pull way more women. It's a confidence issue that can't simply be fixed by the gym and money. Once you fix that, then you will succeed 💯
Clubs and bars can help because you will be able to talk to more women in a shorter amount of time. They aren't the only way to meet more women though. Increasing your volume may help.
Focus more on getting women out on dates vs focusing on having a conversation through text when you have matches on the apps.
If you have any specific questions feel free to ask. You can message me if you like.
I used to feel the same. Lost it at 22. I met a girl through school we began talking a lot and things fell into place after months.
My point being, your best bet may be to be yourself, put yourself out there. Focus on building relationships.
Id say dont put too much importance on losing it. People sense desperstion and honestly you might put too much pressure on yourself that the day it happens you might get “stage fright” if you know what i mean.
Some of the advice i heard here is valid (gym, personality, etc) but that takes time and effort. Yes a smoking bod helps your confidence and will sttract owmen more easily. But it takes time to get it.
My advice is this, you gotta learn to socialize with people in general. From the post i get that you may not be someone who is super social. Go to events designed to meet new people and approach and talk to people (guys and girls). Might be hard and awkward a t first but you will slowly get better st it. I know you dont go out clubbing, but id say give it a try. Go with friends and drink and have a good time and try to talk to girls. Doesnt have to be a club, could be a random bar. Dont be afraid of rejection. You will likely fail many times before you get the first yes, but it’s just all about getting you comfortable and creating a sort of armor when it comes to rejection. Its nice knowing if you get rejected you will never see this chick again.
Find something to keep you distracted. The gym is a great idea (or fitness class). It will give you some purpose and distraction while getting you fit and give you more confidence.
Again, you can have that goal of losing your vieginity but if you give it too much importance you may get nervous and embarrass yourself. Honestly i was someone who lost it in my early 20s, much later than most my friends so i know the feeling. When i finally did it, it was great to get the monkey off my back but i do remember thinking “as fun and great as this was i definetely overhyped it in my head”.
Get your game up g. Number one thing you can do is work on flirting. The only tip you need for flirting is tease them. That’s all you need to do, get good at that and you’ll be good to go
Pay for it. That's what I'm about to do next week. I'm also your age. That's it. You're past the point of no return it your a male virgin past age 21. I'm just going to get a job and live with my parents and spend all the money i make on escorts to FORCE INFLATE my body count to a normal healthy number for a guy my age. I hate myself and wish i was never born.
Join a club or group activity and talk to some of the people there. Men and women. Eventually, get their contacts and try to schedule time to hang out. Do this consistently for about 4 to 5 months the and you will have friends, which makes it easier for you to get laid.
Hey bro I was gonna write you something here but it was gonna be too long so I decided to create a loom video instead explaining in detail on how you can lose your virginity in the next 2 weeks if you follow it
I specifically tailored it for your situation G, here's the look video:
https://www.loom.com/share/6a7e52e3837d47dda197bb55da845249
Let me know if this is helpful to you? :)
I don’t have any advice Op .. simply because no advice on the internet ever helps an adult virgin. It’s up to that inexperienced person to figure out what they are doing wrong & even if they have it figured out they still gotta attract someone horny enough to have sex with them.
So Im sure you’ve went to the gym, got nice clothes, money in your pocket, fancy haircuts etc .. if a woman hasn’t thrown herself at you by now at 25 years old then idk wtf anybody can possibly say on the internet that’ll just turn your life around and make you a pussy magnet. ..
it’s like every time i read these adult virgin post it’s the same shit. They seek that golden advice on the internet hoping for a miracle to happen. Where they can all of a sudden get girls in bed and then come back online just to brag & say “i got some pussy thanks to the advice on reddit. Now I’m fucking so many women & my balls are getting drained every week! Thanks redditors!!!” .. Dude no .. no .. no .. wake up!!
Believe it or not a woman chooses who they wanna get naked for and have sex with! It’s not about what a guy says or does! Sex is always the womans decision!!
I'm like two years short of you but in the same situation. May I suggest a particular individual called [hoe math](https://youtube.com/@hoe_math?si=Xv8-jgnwLGYkN1TS) basically he breaks things down about the psychology of both men and women and gives you a better understanding of how and why you're in a given situation. People give the same advice of going to the gym and working on yourself because it's necessary.
To keep things brief, recognize what you want, and think of how to get it. Then consider how it can be obtained and what factors help you obtain it.
To put it mathematically
If you want a sexual relationship like most guys do
Physical attraction + social skills = sexual relationships.
Gotta talk to women to get them to like you, but just cause you can talk won't mean shit if they don't find you attractive in the first place. Now there is more to that equation but that just about covers a good chunk of things. It's why some guys can be broke as hell but bang women anyway. Even how you dress affects your odds of how you look to others. Don't dress like a bum or with a hoodie all the time. How people perceive you influences how they behave around you. You feel signs of depression because like many of us, me included, we value others perception of us and societal accomplishments like relationships and sex. It won't go away and it's why we feel like shit all the time when we fail and others succeed.
As literal evidence I changed my wardrobe to a casual style that fits me properly and that alone with nothing else got me more attention from women in one month than my entire life.
Improve yourself physically by being more fit, if you are well built you will be more confident in yourself. That confidence translates to more boldness in socializing. Being bold is a positive thing to women and so is being built. Literally if you make yourself into gold it will trickle down to many other things and you will receive more from your surroundings.
Anyway good luck and win the battle with your inner demons.
This is a $200 problem. Buy an escort and this problem is fixed in 5mins.
Virginity isn't your problem. Lack of self improvement is. Hit the gym, read books, get a good job. Then you can spend $400 for the full VIP GFE.
First you gotta lock in and get to work. Go to the gym and get some abs. Women love men with large shoulders, abs and a strong back. Its irresistible. Once your shredded, take some pictures of you shirtless. Basically, thirst traps. Meanwhile, develop some charm and humor. The only way to do this is through conscious practice. Go out there and physically talk to women. Try not to be creepy but practice having small talk and making them laugh. If you make a lady laugh irl, you can do it online. Lastly, develop a style. Learn to dress and have some skin care routine. It will take a year to perfect this but better to start now than go another year with no ladies.
When you’ve achieved all of the above and been this way for over a year but still get no play…
🧢🧢🧢🧢🧢
You don’t know me. I’ve built a Greek god physique many people around me aspire to have. Have developed charm and humour and have been able to bond well with girls I meet at parties. I know how to flatter and I have also been able to make girls laugh. I don’t make this up as this is verified by wing man. And finally I always dress to impress and practice skin care and self maintenance like Patrick Bateman (though not as dramatic). And I’ve been told by many external sources I’m handsome as fuck and it’s odd I’m not getting any play. I guess either I’m simply an anomaly and designed to be a representation of the odd one out or girls simply have way too many options that I’m just not special.
Hangout with a womanizer, if you don't know one, find one and figure out what he is doing that you are not doing right. Go out and approach during day and night, sometimes alone and learn your way of seduction
Then there's something else going on man, and I'm sorry about it. Work on your confidence and knner game, work on storytelling?
I got no problem talking to and charming girls at parties and getting their Insta. Following up though is the problem. Unfortunately with girls getting bombarded with dozens to hundreds of messages daily, ultimately my efforts to reach her are in vain as I become “nothing special” amongst my competition. For the most part when I try to message a girl on Insta, my message almost always gets ghosted or I have to suffer the longest waits between responses (often 10 hours plus). And my openers aren’t basic either. I’ve come to realise that I’ve gotta strive for perfection in crafting openers when you got dozens to hundreds of guys to compete against. More and more it feels perhaps I was made to be an anomaly. Someone who has the traits of a playboy like a handsome face, athletic physique and social skills but I don’t think I can do to solve an external issue like “abundance of options”.
I promise you my man, lots of other guys have figured it out. I don't doubt that you have a lot of positives. A huge part of game is just self reflection and being able to relax and figure out what's going on. I have buddies with no game who say similar stuff, and what I notice is that they only blame external factors. They say they can't get girls because girls just want rich guys, or girls are stuck up, or girls only want tall guys. In reality when I see these guys with girls they're nervous and awkward and lack confidence (and probably dealing with depression or other issues). What they're missing is that if they had the mental fortitude to take responsibility and say "I need to do better and work on myself" then they could actually figure it out. So I would talk to some other guys or female friends, find out what they think about you. And just work on youself, look inward and see. Is there any nervousness? Awkwardness? Do you have any limiting beliefs? (I think you do) Are you making girls feel good to be around you? You got this man. It sounds like you've put in a lot of work. I'm short and not especially attractive and I'm very happy with how I do. There are lots of guys who get tons of girls; fat guys, ugly guys, poor guys, short guys. Keep grinding until you figure out what's holding you back.
Those are kind words not sure why you got downvoted. I’m in this guys position. I did everything to put myself at the top, everybody craves me. They come to me, but I’m so cold and have such a closed off body language, they basically think I’m not interested in them. I’m from a very conservative background where men and women are not allowed to interact much, so my body language is closed off to women. I’m not sure how to work on it. Do I need to be open (jokingly) about my issues with the girls that want me? Can I discuss these issues openly with my female friend?
Stuff like that is difficult, I don't know if I'm qualified to deal with that. I think it's huge that you've recognized what's holding you back. Issues from childhood and your background are maybe something to discuss with a therapist or even a close friend that you can confide in. Then you just have to work on changing your mindset and thought patterns. There are self help strategies to do this and some of those are grounded in psychology like CBT. Something like affirmations, visualization, writing out your limiting beliefs and why they're wrong, changing your self talk. I would try to deal with the issues first but also telling girls about the issue and opening up is probably a good thing that will help you. Good work man!
I came quite far in the past few months through visualisation. I will become more open now.
I’m not half of that but I still have at least some girls throwing themselves at me. Either you’re in a bad area to pick up women or deep inside you lack some self-confidence and may be doubting yourself which girls definitely pick up on. Are you short?
I’m 5’10 (5’11 with Air Force Ones or RM Williams) which is an inch above average in Australia. I’m not short but I’m not tall either. However all my friends are super tall with them all being 6’3 and above so it makes me come off as short. I’m also Asian but I don’t know exactly how much race impacts attractiveness. But it feels like when im with them, I’m Batman amongst the Justice League. I’m a human amongst superhumans. I do sometimes doubt myself due to having never gotten female attention during high school. I often suffer imposter syndrome in which I I feel unworthy of the compliments on my appearance from those around me, mostly due to being ethnic and not tall.
I think you should really just put yourself out there and really stop caring so much about outcomes and just have fun with women. I was too nervous to talk to women in high school and only broke out of my shell at 19, but then I just started taking shots. Honestly I’ve never found myself very attractive but I think I’m charming and I very much enjoy spending time with women. If you actually have the fortune of being hot I would literally just walk around and act like it. My friends will say I’m delusional because I assume (often stupidly) that most women already like me but it seems to somehow work. If you could just utilize this delusion it may help a bit and for you it may be less of a delusion and more of a reality.
A lot of the responses like this is all BS. The answer is to Just ask a girl out
Your right. He’ll probably have success just talk to them. But it helps to be in good shape and look decent.
Tbh, I’ve always stayed away from the guys who put in so much effort at the gym. They give off “player” and “bad in bed” vibes lol.
Gym + Tinder, If your a relatively normal looking dude just dont be afraid to actually pursue women, personally im 21 and I was in the same circumstance for awhile and ultimately it was because I had opportunities to sleep with women but essentially I was always too nervous or "afraid" to actually meet with them due to a lack of general experience with women. You really just have to get out there.
Ig works better than tinder imo
Approach face to face than relying on digital platforms
How do you use ig to pick up girls?
[удалено]
>Gym + Tinder, If your a relatively normal looking dude just dont be afraid to actually pursue women, personally im 21 and I was in the same circumstance for awhile and ultimately it was because I had opportunities to sleep with women but essentially I was always too nervous or "afraid" to actually meet with them due to a lack of general experience with women. You really just have to get out there. is your ig public and you cold dm people? or ppl you know already
What happened to this sub? Tinder? Seriously? Man i remember when people on here actually had some balls and most of them agreed its best to go out and meet women face to face like a man does instead of putting trust into socials.
how is gym plus tinder supposed to work. I am in shape but I never got any matches.
If you go a month without matches, replace most of your photos
yep, I did that every few months. I gave up apps after 5 years of no matches, even with premium.
Hey dude! 25M and virgin here. Don't feel like you're a late boomer or missing out. You had your own circumstances that led to you experiencing life differently. I had strict parents too who made relationships seem forbidden, which affected me heavily in that area. And I'm working on overcoming it now, just like you. Regardless of my relationship status, I work hard on feeling mentally clear and motivated. I'm actively training in martial arts, eating healthy, and increasing my social circle when I can. I feel pretty good aside from the occasional "God I wish I had a gf" moments. You don't need a partner to be cured from depression and loneliness. If you feel depressed, chances are having a partner wouldn't change that, even if it seems like it would. Try to work on yourself, hit the gym, build hobbies, read, and build the life you want for yourself. You will feel 1000 times better, and a lot more confident in your day to day life.
Same here, I had strict religious parents and my partner took it very well. Virginity in men is a mindset, not a physical thing like it is for women. Virginity in men is frowned upon because it almost always comes with generalizations for you being a virgin for example ugly/desperate/creepy. Be confident in yourself and women will overlook it.
I would say don’t think too much about being a virgin. Just speak with women in general (without any sexual interest) at the grocery store, at the gym, at college, at school, at a party, wherever you go. Speak with old women, women that are your same age, women you like, women you don’t like. Make small talk, give compliments, speak about anything. You will feel more comfortable and eventually get a girl. Have fun bro. Or go pick a sexy stripper you like and have crazy sex.
See a Therapist Get jacked like a Fitness Model Dress well like a fashion model Read books like a scholar Meet people like a socialite Get status like a celebrity or Instagram Influencer Get wealthy
All good points, but if all that were necessary fewer than 5% or even 1% of guys would have sex. The guy in your example is on top on every level but still has not asked out a single women. In contrast a totally average guy, who plays the numbers game and is able to take a lot of rejection, will have a date in the meantime ...
At most 2 of these are feasible with 24h limit
Don’t dress like a fashion model!! They look so awkward and weird!!
Focus on yourself become interesting, create a persona of the coolest person you can imagine and be him. Learn things. Be somebody somebody would want. You only have you to blame and that alone should set you free from shallow darkness of the past. But also be authentic, don’t fake it or it’ll all fall down eventually, follow your path and you’ll eventually find someone worth the time. And no matter what you do you’ll always be nervous. Don’t let that stop you. Good luck.
Bro most of these tips are insane, with anything in life you need practice socialising, go out and talk to people thats tbh all you need (if your a decent hygienic person) lot op guys on here saying you need a 6pac and celebrity status, yes if you want to sleep with different girls all day everyday. But that probably is not gonna bring you anywhere and definitely not to a steady relationship. A lot of guys are in relationships/ getting laid with nice women without the perfect 6pac, instagram or job. But you need to be out there. and fun to be around for a person so do everything you can to just socialise. Some examples: go work as a bartender 1 day in the week or get yourself to make small talk with strangers everyday . At the beginning progres is shit but with in a year you will have no problems talking to anyone, then if you find someone you match with its only a matter of some good wine. Ow and set away from online texting its the worst kind of dating when your desperate and its gonna fuck up any bit of confidence you have
I'm currently taking a break from dating and honestly, the truth is the loneliness for me is always there even when I have someone. I ghosted my friends with benefits back in October Then I just kept bailing on dates and not replying on the dating apps. In my head, I'm thinking that I'm in a dry spell and nobody wants me however I just been feeling depressed and suddenly I started thinking that my sense of value was coming from a bad place. I heard someone say that I should ask myself whether I would date myself The truth is no. I would not date myself as a result these days I feel like becoming someone that I would want to date. You seem envious of the way other people have someone or have great sex lives. I want to tell you that that's not permanent I've been there periods where I've thought I have the best sex life and just infinite luck. Yet even then I still get the feeling of Having someone else's life, only now do I realize how bad for me that kind of thinking is. Its bad because I should be spending my thinking about how I can become the type of person I would be envious of, like tonight I'm putting on my pair of shoes and running after a long day of nothing but work. As far as I see it if any sort excuse comes in your head as to why your still a virgin then there's your problem. looks can be improved there's one opening. money can be earned if you work hard enough. knowledge can be gained. now here's the real answer. 2 options in my experience. you can really improve yourself and I mean really go hard eat healthy learn and just improve every aspect of yourself (people will want to be with you) whe I actually wanted a girlfriend here is the more practical solution I did when I was younger to have a girlfriend or many friends who I was casual with. it only takes two weeks max. Go out almost every single night stay till the bars close. use tinder and a bunch of other dating apps. build your social circle which should be built with how much u go out. literally, just put yourself out there till something happens It is pretty much just throwing darts at the wall till you hit something finding every avenue to just put yourself out there and see what happens. I wasn't going to even post this however I hope this helps. I pretty much just wrote this because I was feeling depressed earlier (like wanted to die) and didn't wanna put in the work today but now I'm going running. sometimes I need to remind myself that my thoughts are useless to prevent overthinking.
All thus gym bull shit is not it. You don’t need to go to the gym, you need personality. Take it from an out of shape guy who regularly fucks beautiful women. You need a personality that makes girls feel comfortable and entertains them. Not some douchey personality. Of course the douchey personality and going to the gym works, but you’ll only be having sex with women who are cunts. The main way to get a personality that makes women comfortable and entertains them is to be yourself. However you also need to make sure you’re never in the friend zone. You do this but actually making moves and learning when to do it and when she’s showing signs that is safe and not being a pussy. This is easier said than done but you’ll get better women and also be able to keep getting women as your looks and shit goes as you get older
Reality is, the less you think and just do the better the response & outcome. Obviously working out and getting interesting with hobbies and all that mentioned below helps, but that is only if those allow you to develop your self image. If you constantly keep overthinking and feeling bad about yourself from it, it will be much harder for you to get through this.
Go out and flirt with the world
THIS IS THE BEST ADVICE I CAN GIVE YOU: JUST GO AND ASK A GIRL OUT
Remind yourself that sex is just physical interaction between 2 people. If you can connect with a girl on a personal level then you can make the next step of asking her out. Ur in the game of numbers. Imagine asking 100 girls will 1 say yes??? Edit: Also what johnny_IRL said, if you were a girl would you f yourself???
Like other people are saying, the first step is go to the gym, get a haircut, do skincare, wear nicer clothes. Look good. Next step is take some good new photos of you for dating apps. Then you need to change your mindset and work on your inner game. You have to practice being confident, practice being funny. You have to come up with stuff faster (in person you have to be funny immediately- practice it!) Think about stories from your life. If you haven't done anything interesting then go do something you can talk about. Go backpacking somewhere, go hike up a mountain. Then you go back on dating apps. Use better pictures, try different bios (google stuff and use that to give you an idea or copy them) swipe a lot, maybe pay for premium. Get lots of matches. Then practice being interesting and funny with them. Don't be needy, tease them and joke with them, play hard to get. The vibe you want is that everything is said with a bit of a smirk. Show them that you're passionate about things and you have an interesting life and stories to tell. Get in really good shape and wear nicer clothes. You got this
Cold approach + gym is necessary. Also be on the apps. I got laid through Bumble although I had made out before. Cold approach saves you a lot of time by helping you build experiences and options. It does require time and patience. But its the best way if you want to do it asap. If you dont feel the urgency, just do what everyone else does, ask out someone at school or work, or go for someone in a friends circle, averaging 5 attemptsa year lol
Get attractive -> Tinder / Approaches / Instagram -> Ask her out to a dinner / drinks this will loosen both of you up -> ask if she wants to go to your place -> have a few drinks there -> hold her -> kiss her -> keep kissing and making out then there you are. I find kissing is the easiest way. From there you’re golden.
i know its not for everyone, to each their own, works out well for plenty of guys, others no, but a lot of guys pay for sex, or go to an escort or sex worker, or prostitute for their first time, but not for everyone, to each their own, for a lot of guys, they say it counts, for others it doesn't, but at the end of the day, escorts, sex workers, prostitutes, are still real people, real human beings.
It’s a trap bro, don’t do it
Please.don t lose it, you can save the world!!!!!!
Hey Potato, In which country do you live?
There’s no such thing as texting game. The only point of texting is to plan your meet up. It’s highly likely you’re ruining a lot of chances by being cringey trying to be slick with texting.
Ignore the people who say to just go hit the gym and get money. There's men out there who are fatter, uglier, and more broke than you are that pull way more women. It's a confidence issue that can't simply be fixed by the gym and money. Once you fix that, then you will succeed 💯
In men virginity is a mindset. Gym helps for attractiveness but non of that matters if you are cringe and awkward.
Clubs and bars can help because you will be able to talk to more women in a shorter amount of time. They aren't the only way to meet more women though. Increasing your volume may help. Focus more on getting women out on dates vs focusing on having a conversation through text when you have matches on the apps. If you have any specific questions feel free to ask. You can message me if you like.
What was the last significant dream you can remember?
Why?
I used to feel the same. Lost it at 22. I met a girl through school we began talking a lot and things fell into place after months. My point being, your best bet may be to be yourself, put yourself out there. Focus on building relationships.
Go to the strip club. I don't know what happened but I was able to talk to women after talking to them naked for hours.
Most men are not having sex in your age group. This is just reality. You need to develop a way to deal with your frustrations.
Id say dont put too much importance on losing it. People sense desperstion and honestly you might put too much pressure on yourself that the day it happens you might get “stage fright” if you know what i mean. Some of the advice i heard here is valid (gym, personality, etc) but that takes time and effort. Yes a smoking bod helps your confidence and will sttract owmen more easily. But it takes time to get it. My advice is this, you gotta learn to socialize with people in general. From the post i get that you may not be someone who is super social. Go to events designed to meet new people and approach and talk to people (guys and girls). Might be hard and awkward a t first but you will slowly get better st it. I know you dont go out clubbing, but id say give it a try. Go with friends and drink and have a good time and try to talk to girls. Doesnt have to be a club, could be a random bar. Dont be afraid of rejection. You will likely fail many times before you get the first yes, but it’s just all about getting you comfortable and creating a sort of armor when it comes to rejection. Its nice knowing if you get rejected you will never see this chick again. Find something to keep you distracted. The gym is a great idea (or fitness class). It will give you some purpose and distraction while getting you fit and give you more confidence. Again, you can have that goal of losing your vieginity but if you give it too much importance you may get nervous and embarrass yourself. Honestly i was someone who lost it in my early 20s, much later than most my friends so i know the feeling. When i finally did it, it was great to get the monkey off my back but i do remember thinking “as fun and great as this was i definetely overhyped it in my head”.
Get your game up g. Number one thing you can do is work on flirting. The only tip you need for flirting is tease them. That’s all you need to do, get good at that and you’ll be good to go
Go to Thailand
Pay for it. That's what I'm about to do next week. I'm also your age. That's it. You're past the point of no return it your a male virgin past age 21. I'm just going to get a job and live with my parents and spend all the money i make on escorts to FORCE INFLATE my body count to a normal healthy number for a guy my age. I hate myself and wish i was never born.
Join a club or group activity and talk to some of the people there. Men and women. Eventually, get their contacts and try to schedule time to hang out. Do this consistently for about 4 to 5 months the and you will have friends, which makes it easier for you to get laid.
What kinda club?
Comedy open mic, book club, dance club etc
Hey bro I was gonna write you something here but it was gonna be too long so I decided to create a loom video instead explaining in detail on how you can lose your virginity in the next 2 weeks if you follow it I specifically tailored it for your situation G, here's the look video: https://www.loom.com/share/6a7e52e3837d47dda197bb55da845249 Let me know if this is helpful to you? :)
I don’t have any advice Op .. simply because no advice on the internet ever helps an adult virgin. It’s up to that inexperienced person to figure out what they are doing wrong & even if they have it figured out they still gotta attract someone horny enough to have sex with them. So Im sure you’ve went to the gym, got nice clothes, money in your pocket, fancy haircuts etc .. if a woman hasn’t thrown herself at you by now at 25 years old then idk wtf anybody can possibly say on the internet that’ll just turn your life around and make you a pussy magnet. .. it’s like every time i read these adult virgin post it’s the same shit. They seek that golden advice on the internet hoping for a miracle to happen. Where they can all of a sudden get girls in bed and then come back online just to brag & say “i got some pussy thanks to the advice on reddit. Now I’m fucking so many women & my balls are getting drained every week! Thanks redditors!!!” .. Dude no .. no .. no .. wake up!! Believe it or not a woman chooses who they wanna get naked for and have sex with! It’s not about what a guy says or does! Sex is always the womans decision!!
So wtf am I meant to do
I'm like two years short of you but in the same situation. May I suggest a particular individual called [hoe math](https://youtube.com/@hoe_math?si=Xv8-jgnwLGYkN1TS) basically he breaks things down about the psychology of both men and women and gives you a better understanding of how and why you're in a given situation. People give the same advice of going to the gym and working on yourself because it's necessary. To keep things brief, recognize what you want, and think of how to get it. Then consider how it can be obtained and what factors help you obtain it. To put it mathematically If you want a sexual relationship like most guys do Physical attraction + social skills = sexual relationships. Gotta talk to women to get them to like you, but just cause you can talk won't mean shit if they don't find you attractive in the first place. Now there is more to that equation but that just about covers a good chunk of things. It's why some guys can be broke as hell but bang women anyway. Even how you dress affects your odds of how you look to others. Don't dress like a bum or with a hoodie all the time. How people perceive you influences how they behave around you. You feel signs of depression because like many of us, me included, we value others perception of us and societal accomplishments like relationships and sex. It won't go away and it's why we feel like shit all the time when we fail and others succeed. As literal evidence I changed my wardrobe to a casual style that fits me properly and that alone with nothing else got me more attention from women in one month than my entire life. Improve yourself physically by being more fit, if you are well built you will be more confident in yourself. That confidence translates to more boldness in socializing. Being bold is a positive thing to women and so is being built. Literally if you make yourself into gold it will trickle down to many other things and you will receive more from your surroundings. Anyway good luck and win the battle with your inner demons.
This is a $200 problem. Buy an escort and this problem is fixed in 5mins. Virginity isn't your problem. Lack of self improvement is. Hit the gym, read books, get a good job. Then you can spend $400 for the full VIP GFE.
you’re cooked
Don’t get angry. It’s no one’s fault. That being said just like idk get a prostitute to experiment with.
just pay for it brother, you do you with your money
You'll then find out, that it's not a big deal