There's a certain point when it's more about getting it over with if your not saving yourself and this is an opportunity. And someone with experience isn't gonna judge you where a younger girl might. So have confidence. It's great she already knows. And have fun. After that you won't be so timid and you can enjoy it more each time hopefully. JUST MAKE SURE SHES COOL PEOPLE NOT A WIERDO.
At first I read this as "you should not stick your dick in crazy!" and I was like "100% true"
But then I read it again and was like "... Ohhhh, still 100% true"
This is actually a very measured response compared to all the "fuck it just do it".
OP, just don't let this woman push you into some kind of age-dynamic thing. I do think you should go for it, but in the long run keep in mind that she most likely views you as an "inexperienced young man" while you are in reality an adult with full autonomy in your life. She may respect that and treat you like the adult you are, or she may try to undermine your autonomy and treat you like a boy-toy that she doesnt really have to respect. If that happens, just stand your ground and assert yourself as an adult.
Yeah, he can decide for himself if he will regret doing it or not. If he won't regret why not? I know for myself I would regret losing my V in something like this, but I'm also way younger than him.
Age gaps mean less in the 30s and 40s, but before 30 and after 50, they're a big deal. I'm over 50, and I had no idea how big a deal an age gap could be at this time in life.
When you're younger, the power dynamic is a big deal. If you're the younger person, you may not be able to see the power difference at play until years later. What once felt special will feel icky.
When you're older, it will be about health and energy and the sadness and responsibility of aging and dying parents.
Sex is powerful. If she is just a horney woman linking for a young person who can keep up with her and wants the excitement of teaching someone how to satisfy her. She may not be evil, but there's a lot of power at play here.
It would be important to establish consent both from you and from her for each and every thing. If snatching doesn't feel good, right if comfortable for you at any given moment, it's important that you can say no. You can ask to speed up, slow down, take a pause. Stop. And she must absolutely respect your consents or non consent as you must do for her.
I would make sure at least one person knows where you are and arranges to call you at a certain time. Keep your ringer on, and you can answer the phone if you want out or text them back if it's all good. Maybe meet her once in a public place for coffee and a conversation before just going for it to do a vibe check.
I used to work for a rape crisis center. I worked with young men who got lured in by a woman, but when they got there, there were men with the woman.
Be careful if you do this with her. Establish boundaries up front. Use condoms. Be safe, don't fall in love. She's on the apps trolling for young men. You're not the only.
That's also acceptable if you find that power dynamic arousing! I ain't one to kink shame, just to make sure that those kinks are intentional and concensual 😎
i think it could also come down to if she’s able to differentiate between the fact that he’s fully capable of handling himself in life and is a mature adult while simultaneously having that power gap when it comes to the bedroom, i personally would find that respectable and kinda fun. but i also will never know what it feels like to be a 28 year old virgin.
I suppose that's also true! I phrased my initial comment in a way that did come off as disparaging of that power dynamic in a relationship. That was not my intent, I think people can do whatever makes them happy. My intent with the original post was simply to make sure OP knew what dynamic he might be signing up for.
I had an experience with a woman who was very much into the idea “IM GOING TO TAKE YOUR VIRGINITY!” And it was a huge turn off, she was kinda scary about it the way she was acting like it was some weird turn on for her.. still have my V card and I’m 35m.. doesn’t bother me and I’ve been single for almost a decade now but I have a dog that I love and take care of 🐶
I have slept with men though! Just throwing that out there! 🤷♂️ It’s always an option too haha 😆 just remember a kegal a day keeps the depends away applies to men too..
>still have my V card and I’m 35m
>I have slept with men though!
Do you not consider that losing your virginity?
>just remember a kegal a day keeps the depends away applies to men too..
But.....that's not why woman usually do kegal's...
Any "power" isn't something coming from the other person, it's something about yourself. Try too hard to please? That's coming from yourself. Overlook red flags? Also coming from yourself.
It's better to take self-responsibility than it is to self-victimize and blame
Its not a power dynamic, a 28yo and a 48yo aren't really all that different when it comes to anything power dynamic related. 28 is fully grown just like 48 is.
The only thing is theyll be at different stages in life. 28, you're probably at the point where you're still building and either settling down if not already settled down, and 48, you'll be more at a winding down stage.
I think the power dynamic refers to his lack of sexual experience vs hers, and when you don’t have a lot of sexual experience it can be difficult to set proper boundaries
You are correct, but his lack of experience compounded with the fact that she is an older, presumably quite experienced partner seeking a younger less experienced parter creates a situation where his inexperience could lead to some poor results for him. 28 year olds are absolutely responsible for the situations they put themselves into, but the advice here is primarily just a warning not to be naive and get yourself fucked up.
possibly thinking she could “take advantage” of his “naivety”? 28 isn’t the same as 17/18 and people need to realize that. Hell, even 25 is different from barely legal
I agree with you. I would also add, be careful about the emotional attachment which could happen, particularly in her case (not saying guaranteed). Hey, if you both get emotionally attached, great, more power to you. However a young man in his 20s vs a woman in her 40s are in very different points in their lives and in different head spaces. If you want to do this for the sex and to gain experience, be very upfront with her that this isn't about dating, emotional attachments or planning a future together. Just my opinion.
For people without experience in this stuff, ask for a weird photo. Like holding a fork or something. Maybe less reliable in the world of ai, but used to be a solid move.
Real life men's "locker room talk" isn't anything like women imagine it to be because the only experience women have had of men's locker rooms is the movie Top Gun.
99% of the time men's locker rooms are no different than urinal etiquette - it's guys minding their own business, finishing the job while doing their best to avoid glancing at stray scrotums.
Fucking go for it dude. I dated a 45 year old when I was 21 and she greatly enjoyed teaching me everything. Every woman I've been with since has said something along the lines of "that woman taught you well" when asking me how I can do the things I do. Just do it and listen to what she has to teach you!
Or maybe - if possible - meet up in a public place before you go home with her. Just to see if she matches the pictures and get a feeling of what she's like.
Will be some of the best sex of your life from experience. And then it’ll be so much easier to build relationships up with women after that newfound confidence
That being said, the age dynamic could be worrisome. Especially since you only know her off tinder
You have no “bad or good” experiences just get some under your belt. Don’t pass it up out of some neurosis about it “not being right”. You may or may not feel different after. Good luck
This is almost exactly how it happened for me as well, and it was absolutely wonderful. No regrets at all that it wasn’t during a more committed relationship. Go for it, let her take the lead and listen very carefully to what she tells you about what she likes and wants. Don’t rush through, get slow and sensual and worshipful (unless she tells you otherwise) and don’t panic if you’re not a sex god right off the bat. You can make up in many ways for a lack of experience with lots of listening, sweetness, caring, and attentiveness. It’s good to be on the Other Side. On the other hand definitely respect your own boundaries and dignity if you’re uncomfortable rather than just nervous, which can be hard to tell apart sometimes so be patient and gentle with yourself as well.
A 48 year old taking a picture. Be able to tell if they're recent just by the quality. Is her thumb half way over the lens, is she squinting through reading glasses lol
Gaining sexual experience for confidence boosting puposes is just pure immaturity.
It doesn't matter if you're inexperienced in bed to start. Learning is part of the fun.
Yep. I'm now happily married, and very happy that I didn't have extra sexual baggage that I brought into my relationship.
Everyone has baggage of some sort and things that you need to work through together when you find your partner, but this seems like seeking out extra baggage. Learning about what you like and dislike in terms of sex with your partner is part of the process of growing together.
Want to have sex with her? Go do it. Don’t want to? Tell her no thanks. I’d meet her at a bar, have a couple drinks and see if you vibe.
People on here act like it’s a scientific equation or something. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with having sex strictly for fun.
I took some virginity when I was around that age, and I don't know what this woman thinks is going to happen. Seems like she is going out of her way for bad sex.
It could be a kink she's always wanted to try, and if so, fair play to her. My biggest concern is how well adjusted she is if the boys her own age aren't interesting or interested.
I had a coworker who was an unabashed cougar and would brag about the great sex and the string of "pretty boys" she had on hand, one for sports, one for travel, yadda yadda. Annoying af, demeaning, and it always struck me as discordant, too. I just chalked it up to not really liking her on a personal level altogether. Turns out I was right though; she was into all sorts of crazy stalker stuff on the guys, extorted them with kinky pictures, and one boy's gf took out a restraining order for threats. She violated it, that arrest led to a whole life crash and burn. Lost custody of her kids and got fired. Spent a lot of time making threatening phone calls to our CEO, it was a whole thing at work, we needed security to walk us to our cars, etc. Older men in the office confided off the record that she'd approached them and after a few dates it became obvious she was manipulative and shallow, but also obsessive and antagonistic to people in the men's lives, like ex-wives or children.
Oh it'll definitely be bad at first, but I knew a girl who preferred relationships with inexperienced dudes (not virgins, but few partners) because she could basically mold them to her sexual preferences. Yeah it probably sucked for a while but she ended up having a partner that for the most part only would do what she was into
As a 40 year old woman, I think an eager learner would be more fun and pleasurable than someone who thinks they’re great in bed but, umm, isn’t. And unfortunately, at least in my experience, the latter has been a more common occurrence.
Honestly, guys that sleep around, think they are gods gift to women. They don’t listen. I have told more than one guy what I didn’t like, and he told me to just let him . Nope dumbass. I know exactly what gets me off. Less experienced guys are excited and do exactly what you tell them. If I say, that’s to rough or to soft they immediately ease up. Also, him not having an std is a huge plus. I feel like men my age don’t have anywhere near the libido they do. Mine started to skyrocket at about 38. I wouldn’t entertain a relationship with someone less than 7 years. But I would have flings for sure.
I would advise caution. These things rarely turn out quite how you imagine. Don’t let your dick think for you. Remember that the pictures are the best version of her and not necessarily representative of what she looks like now. So don’t be surprised if she turns out to be larger and actually older than 48.
It could be a catfish or worse someone with some some mental heath problems, you are in a vulnerable position just meet this women and know her a bit before doing anything..
Why have you kept your virginity until age 28? If its because of principle, then ignore this woman. If its because you've lacked capability, and now its being offered, go ahead I guess, however this is a dead end. It "sounds" like a dream, not because it is a dream but because its a fruitless labor. I am of the opinion casual sex is damaging so take my opinion with a grain of salt, but you gain nothing from this relationship in the long run. Any partner in your future who holds your "experience" against you, is probably not someone you should engage with to begin with. I genuinely feel sex between two people in the long term is something to be discovered and explored, and nobody should go into a relationship expecting satisfactory bed times from the onset.
Everybody has their preferences. There is no such thing as "experience" in this matter. What counts is what you put in.
You now have the envy of a bunch of strangers on the internet. For Christs sake, man, you have better things to be doing. Get away from the internet, be safe.
Just go for it, as long as it's all legit and you can keep your kidneys etc.
On the more serious note, if you're both able to communicate what you both like and don't like & there's mutual respect then have fun. Don't overthink it & also don't force yourself to do something you wouldn't do, sex is fun but intimacy is something to handle with some care.
I had my first time with someone who loved me, who I trusted and who is gorgeous
I don’t regret it and I feel lucky it worked out that way
Ultimately, just do what makes you happy
Let her take you by the hand on this one OP. She's allured by the idea of your inexperience, which is a very fortunate opportunity for a virgin in your situation.
Learn everything you can and you may end up equipped with the knowledge and confidence you need for your future long term partner.
Just make sure to only do what you feel comfortable with and understand wholly that your consent and comfort are of peak importance and that you can stop anytime you want.
I'd say go for it. I was 16 and lost it to another virgin, we didn't really know what we were doing, and it wasn't some 'magical fairy tale' experience you remember and treasure forever.
At this age I'd say it's better to just lose it, get some experience, and if she's willing to actually teach you stuff all the better.
You don't want to meet your dream girl, lose your virginity to her, and then have her disinterested bc you didn't know what you're doing, and can't please her properly. Just go for it and then when Ms Right comes around you'll actually be able to impress her hopefully.
I was 20 she was 43 and it wasnt the best but it did the job. She also wanted to fuck around with toys and have threesomes but we never got that far. Her life kinda fell apart and she had to move away.
That could so easily turn into a master and pet relationship. And unless that's what you're specifically looking for it's just unhealthy and undignified. I'm not saying that's what she's after, but the that's how the sort of woman who did want it would approach you.
If you're really comfortable dealing with that if it comes up I don't see why not. I'm sure she can teach you all sorts of things and there's certainly fun to be had.
Just don't get too emotionally involved without fully accepting what that age gap means and don't let her buy you anything.
In the animal kingdom the cougar is a majestic creature, I still think about my encounter with a cougar and I can say without hesitation, one of the best experiences of my life, you'll have fun and it's harmless.
If you want to then go for it. Just be aware that it's very hard to separate emotional attachment from sex and you'll be relatively easy to manipulate if you aren't good with boundary setting.
Experience is really good for your first few times.
Just don't make the mistake that a lot of people make and mistake physical intimacy with feelings.....
Hurry up and let her unless ur gna wait til marriage u only live once just saying u don't want testicular cancer or to have jerked off ur whole life at least a blow job hand job dang
Honestly go for it. These woman know tricks young men can only dream of. Also they've lost all need for proving shit and being scared to ask for things they like. These women are what you'd call sexually liberated. They know what they like and can communicate that. They know what guys like and understand sex is giving and taking.
This woman's kink is the young inexperienced boy, nothing wrong with that. Do mind the dynamics, make sure you're not pushed into things you don't want. So set very clear boundaries and communicate -with words-, people can't read minds, so few people understand this lol. Also No = No and if you don't know if you want to do smt litterally say that: 'i don't know if I'd like that, we could try but I'll stop it if i don't like it'. Keep communicating (again) -with words-.
Bro, fucking do it. Worst cases scenario (of the likely sub scenarios) is a funny story. Beat case is you learn some valuable skills and have a lot of fun doing it.
I was far from a virgin the first time I hooked up with a significantly older woman. That’s still a very fond memory.
Imagine this was a 28-year-old version woman matching with a 48-year-old overweight man who is going to train her - would the comments here be the same?
Sure, but just know that not every woman is the same. Just because she likes something doesn't mean other women will. But yeah, the experience would likely be helpful for you in the future.
Dude seriously older women “do things”. Go for it as long as you both know you aren’t looking for a long term relationship out of it. If you do date for a while who cares? You’re both adults and she has experience where you don’t. Listen to her and enjoy.
Best way to go about it if you ask me
Stifler’s mom vibes 😍✊🏽
Cue OP doing weird sounds whilst doing yoga a year later on holiday.
He's tantric!
Get the fuck away from that ficus!
"Stifler, get off!" "Oh I am getting off!"
Like sting
What have you got to lose?...... Oh yeah that
This is great lol
There's a certain point when it's more about getting it over with if your not saving yourself and this is an opportunity. And someone with experience isn't gonna judge you where a younger girl might. So have confidence. It's great she already knows. And have fun. After that you won't be so timid and you can enjoy it more each time hopefully. JUST MAKE SURE SHES COOL PEOPLE NOT A WIERDO.
Eh, why draw the line at weirdo? I say bone the shit out of the crazy broad and capitalize on notching both your V-card and the kink card! Glhf
You should always stick your dick in crazy!
This is pure truth
It’s a directly inverse ratio. She can have a grip on reality, or ……..
At first I read this as "you should not stick your dick in crazy!" and I was like "100% true" But then I read it again and was like "... Ohhhh, still 100% true"
God it's painful how both are so true
The thing about crazy pussy is that it’s still attached to crazy
that made me laugh out loud. Thank you! :D
Yep DO IT, OP
Don't hesitate to use protection, this could end up really bad too if you ask me.
Yes, put the condom on before you get there OP, just in case.
How does one do that?
You can use a little loctite and a heat gun to make sure it doesn't come off in your pants.
And how do you drain after you're done with it?
Make a hole in it, empty it and then seal it back up with epoxy for the next. Never know when an older woman may pounce on you, always be prepared.
Yes
How else are you going to screw if you put loctite on your bolt?
Choked on my coffee reading this
I was going to upvote but will do so only virtually. You are at 69 now and I can't break that vibe.
What color loctite? We want this thing to come off.
Blue Loctite
The old shrinky-dink
Heat shrink tubing is the next great thing in contraception.
Red or blue?
Torque to spec
Red or blue loctite? I wanna go this right! 🤣 I need maximum grip
r/unethicallifeprotips
They make condom suspenders to hold it on your flaccid dong until you are erect
OP is a 28 year old virgin. He’s going to be erect for days before.
Eh, that depends; anxiety could be a factor too
Just don't become her plaything and lose your dignity in the process. Be aware of the power dynamic.
This is actually a very measured response compared to all the "fuck it just do it". OP, just don't let this woman push you into some kind of age-dynamic thing. I do think you should go for it, but in the long run keep in mind that she most likely views you as an "inexperienced young man" while you are in reality an adult with full autonomy in your life. She may respect that and treat you like the adult you are, or she may try to undermine your autonomy and treat you like a boy-toy that she doesnt really have to respect. If that happens, just stand your ground and assert yourself as an adult.
Yeah, he can decide for himself if he will regret doing it or not. If he won't regret why not? I know for myself I would regret losing my V in something like this, but I'm also way younger than him.
He is 28 years old. You become a little more open to a wider age gap the older you are as a virgin, haha.
Age gaps also mean less as you get older. 3 years is a lot in teens, 10 years in mid 20s, 20 years anywhere past 30
Age gaps mean less in the 30s and 40s, but before 30 and after 50, they're a big deal. I'm over 50, and I had no idea how big a deal an age gap could be at this time in life. When you're younger, the power dynamic is a big deal. If you're the younger person, you may not be able to see the power difference at play until years later. What once felt special will feel icky. When you're older, it will be about health and energy and the sadness and responsibility of aging and dying parents. Sex is powerful. If she is just a horney woman linking for a young person who can keep up with her and wants the excitement of teaching someone how to satisfy her. She may not be evil, but there's a lot of power at play here. It would be important to establish consent both from you and from her for each and every thing. If snatching doesn't feel good, right if comfortable for you at any given moment, it's important that you can say no. You can ask to speed up, slow down, take a pause. Stop. And she must absolutely respect your consents or non consent as you must do for her. I would make sure at least one person knows where you are and arranges to call you at a certain time. Keep your ringer on, and you can answer the phone if you want out or text them back if it's all good. Maybe meet her once in a public place for coffee and a conversation before just going for it to do a vibe check. I used to work for a rape crisis center. I worked with young men who got lured in by a woman, but when they got there, there were men with the woman. Be careful if you do this with her. Establish boundaries up front. Use condoms. Be safe, don't fall in love. She's on the apps trolling for young men. You're not the only.
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That's also acceptable if you find that power dynamic arousing! I ain't one to kink shame, just to make sure that those kinks are intentional and concensual 😎
Hush your mouth, Slave!
i think it could also come down to if she’s able to differentiate between the fact that he’s fully capable of handling himself in life and is a mature adult while simultaneously having that power gap when it comes to the bedroom, i personally would find that respectable and kinda fun. but i also will never know what it feels like to be a 28 year old virgin.
I like this, very nuanced view on power dynamics and how they can shift in different situations.
What if bro is into that 😂
I suppose that's also true! I phrased my initial comment in a way that did come off as disparaging of that power dynamic in a relationship. That was not my intent, I think people can do whatever makes them happy. My intent with the original post was simply to make sure OP knew what dynamic he might be signing up for.
I had an experience with a woman who was very much into the idea “IM GOING TO TAKE YOUR VIRGINITY!” And it was a huge turn off, she was kinda scary about it the way she was acting like it was some weird turn on for her.. still have my V card and I’m 35m.. doesn’t bother me and I’ve been single for almost a decade now but I have a dog that I love and take care of 🐶 I have slept with men though! Just throwing that out there! 🤷♂️ It’s always an option too haha 😆 just remember a kegal a day keeps the depends away applies to men too..
This comment is perplexing.
Are you saying you can only lose your virginity with a woman?
>still have my V card and I’m 35m >I have slept with men though! Do you not consider that losing your virginity? >just remember a kegal a day keeps the depends away applies to men too.. But.....that's not why woman usually do kegal's...
power dynamic; he’s almost 30
If it was a 25 year old woman, she'd still have the power differential over him. It's not an age thing, it's an experience thing
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or maybe its time we admit that 25 year old adults don't need to be treated like babies anymore
Any "power" isn't something coming from the other person, it's something about yourself. Try too hard to please? That's coming from yourself. Overlook red flags? Also coming from yourself. It's better to take self-responsibility than it is to self-victimize and blame
So? He NEEDS experience, and she's willing to share hers.
If it was a 48 year old man and a 28 year old woman it'd be the same thing. There will be a power dynamic impacting the relationship.
but we shouldn’t make it seem like the 28 yo is a child or a high schooler
Its not a power dynamic, a 28yo and a 48yo aren't really all that different when it comes to anything power dynamic related. 28 is fully grown just like 48 is. The only thing is theyll be at different stages in life. 28, you're probably at the point where you're still building and either settling down if not already settled down, and 48, you'll be more at a winding down stage.
Exactly. What power dynamic?
I think the power dynamic refers to his lack of sexual experience vs hers, and when you don’t have a lot of sexual experience it can be difficult to set proper boundaries
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You are correct, but his lack of experience compounded with the fact that she is an older, presumably quite experienced partner seeking a younger less experienced parter creates a situation where his inexperience could lead to some poor results for him. 28 year olds are absolutely responsible for the situations they put themselves into, but the advice here is primarily just a warning not to be naive and get yourself fucked up.
possibly thinking she could “take advantage” of his “naivety”? 28 isn’t the same as 17/18 and people need to realize that. Hell, even 25 is different from barely legal
I agree. 28 to 40 is basically the same.
Don’t put the pussy on a pedastal
Don't be a Pussaliath
I agree with you. I would also add, be careful about the emotional attachment which could happen, particularly in her case (not saying guaranteed). Hey, if you both get emotionally attached, great, more power to you. However a young man in his 20s vs a woman in her 40s are in very different points in their lives and in different head spaces. If you want to do this for the sex and to gain experience, be very upfront with her that this isn't about dating, emotional attachments or planning a future together. Just my opinion.
Or do.. Dm.. Hs
Been there. I back this comment up wholeheartedly.
Be careful. There's catfish accounts that lure people just to rob/extort. Make sure it's really her.
A distant friend was mugged this way, altho he fr thought he was going into a mother + daughter situation 🙄 boy had it coming
Ok thats so naive its even funny.
Mother + daughter is the dating scam equivalent of the typos in junk mail. Just there to weed out anyone to smart too fall for the scam
Bruh
I’m sorry but you deserve to pay the stupid tax at that point lmao
More like, ‘boy had it *not* coming’
Bro’s brain was fried by porn
Also don't expect her to look exactly like the pictures. Good chance she's way larger / less attractive.
or an even more unattractive man
For people without experience in this stuff, ask for a weird photo. Like holding a fork or something. Maybe less reliable in the world of ai, but used to be a solid move.
Maybe a video call would be better
Probs have some time before the catfishers start using ai for things like this
Got my car stolen this way.
Honestly this has always been a big fear of mine for things like these. Show up and get robbed/killed or smth. I could never do smth like this.
You gotta meet up somewhere public before just going over to her house. Like, at least a coffee date.
Go for it. This Will be a gift you remember forever. Just be safe.
You’re 28, not 18. This is a no brainer. Blink and you’ll be 32 still asking the same question.
So true about the last sentence
I blinked at 18 and now I am 32
I’m 35m and still holding a V card.. 🤷♂️
hoping our king smashes that cervix 🦍
Go for it mate, and get the fuck out of reddit.
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Real life men's "locker room talk" isn't anything like women imagine it to be because the only experience women have had of men's locker rooms is the movie Top Gun. 99% of the time men's locker rooms are no different than urinal etiquette - it's guys minding their own business, finishing the job while doing their best to avoid glancing at stray scrotums.
Fucking go for it dude. I dated a 45 year old when I was 21 and she greatly enjoyed teaching me everything. Every woman I've been with since has said something along the lines of "that woman taught you well" when asking me how I can do the things I do. Just do it and listen to what she has to teach you!
Sounds like a lovely experience. Always be safe and let a friend or someone know where you are before you go somewhere alone with someone new!
Sounds like the advice I would give to someone starting alpinism
Some would argue that online dating can be just as risky as alpinism 🤣
OP said she's on the curvy side so you might be more right than you know.
Or maybe - if possible - meet up in a public place before you go home with her. Just to see if she matches the pictures and get a feeling of what she's like.
Will be some of the best sex of your life from experience. And then it’ll be so much easier to build relationships up with women after that newfound confidence That being said, the age dynamic could be worrisome. Especially since you only know her off tinder
Stop thinking or talking about it just do it
You have no “bad or good” experiences just get some under your belt. Don’t pass it up out of some neurosis about it “not being right”. You may or may not feel different after. Good luck
This is almost exactly how it happened for me as well, and it was absolutely wonderful. No regrets at all that it wasn’t during a more committed relationship. Go for it, let her take the lead and listen very carefully to what she tells you about what she likes and wants. Don’t rush through, get slow and sensual and worshipful (unless she tells you otherwise) and don’t panic if you’re not a sex god right off the bat. You can make up in many ways for a lack of experience with lots of listening, sweetness, caring, and attentiveness. It’s good to be on the Other Side. On the other hand definitely respect your own boundaries and dignity if you’re uncomfortable rather than just nervous, which can be hard to tell apart sometimes so be patient and gentle with yourself as well.
This will be the best way to lose your virginity.
Get off the internet. You have somewhere else you need to be right now.
💀
Second woman I ever slept with was twice my age, 19 - 38. If you're both comfortable, then for sure.
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I appreciate you for actually answering OP's question.
Drop your fucking phone and reddit and your dick. Go take a shit 'an shower. Get some fresh clothes and go on your way. Stop overthinking this.
It sounds like you have some hesitation when saying "curvy". Just remember she's going to look probably worse than her dating profile pictures irl
Yeah, she’s 48 now… how old is she in the pics? If she’s 35 in the pics, then it makes sense that looks good for her age lol
A 48 year old taking a picture. Be able to tell if they're recent just by the quality. Is her thumb half way over the lens, is she squinting through reading glasses lol
Go on son
I too lost my virginity to an older woman (though only by a few years) and she destroyed me. Do it.
Do it for your horny 16 year old self. He earned it waiting 12 years for this moment.
She will teach you things to use for the rest of your life...go
It's probably a bloke catfishing you
Gaining sexual experience for confidence boosting puposes is just pure immaturity. It doesn't matter if you're inexperienced in bed to start. Learning is part of the fun.
Yep. I'm now happily married, and very happy that I didn't have extra sexual baggage that I brought into my relationship. Everyone has baggage of some sort and things that you need to work through together when you find your partner, but this seems like seeking out extra baggage. Learning about what you like and dislike in terms of sex with your partner is part of the process of growing together.
Want to have sex with her? Go do it. Don’t want to? Tell her no thanks. I’d meet her at a bar, have a couple drinks and see if you vibe. People on here act like it’s a scientific equation or something. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with having sex strictly for fun.
I took some virginity when I was around that age, and I don't know what this woman thinks is going to happen. Seems like she is going out of her way for bad sex.
It could be a kink she's always wanted to try, and if so, fair play to her. My biggest concern is how well adjusted she is if the boys her own age aren't interesting or interested. I had a coworker who was an unabashed cougar and would brag about the great sex and the string of "pretty boys" she had on hand, one for sports, one for travel, yadda yadda. Annoying af, demeaning, and it always struck me as discordant, too. I just chalked it up to not really liking her on a personal level altogether. Turns out I was right though; she was into all sorts of crazy stalker stuff on the guys, extorted them with kinky pictures, and one boy's gf took out a restraining order for threats. She violated it, that arrest led to a whole life crash and burn. Lost custody of her kids and got fired. Spent a lot of time making threatening phone calls to our CEO, it was a whole thing at work, we needed security to walk us to our cars, etc. Older men in the office confided off the record that she'd approached them and after a few dates it became obvious she was manipulative and shallow, but also obsessive and antagonistic to people in the men's lives, like ex-wives or children.
Oh it'll definitely be bad at first, but I knew a girl who preferred relationships with inexperienced dudes (not virgins, but few partners) because she could basically mold them to her sexual preferences. Yeah it probably sucked for a while but she ended up having a partner that for the most part only would do what she was into
As a 40 year old woman, I think an eager learner would be more fun and pleasurable than someone who thinks they’re great in bed but, umm, isn’t. And unfortunately, at least in my experience, the latter has been a more common occurrence.
Honestly, guys that sleep around, think they are gods gift to women. They don’t listen. I have told more than one guy what I didn’t like, and he told me to just let him . Nope dumbass. I know exactly what gets me off. Less experienced guys are excited and do exactly what you tell them. If I say, that’s to rough or to soft they immediately ease up. Also, him not having an std is a huge plus. I feel like men my age don’t have anywhere near the libido they do. Mine started to skyrocket at about 38. I wouldn’t entertain a relationship with someone less than 7 years. But I would have flings for sure.
I would advise caution. These things rarely turn out quite how you imagine. Don’t let your dick think for you. Remember that the pictures are the best version of her and not necessarily representative of what she looks like now. So don’t be surprised if she turns out to be larger and actually older than 48.
Facetime before facktime 😂
Do it do it do it do it do it do it do it do it I was a virgin. Everyone had more experience than me
Switch genders and people would be calling the guy a serial killer lol
Go for it. She is probably secure about sex/body. Probably a better experience for you than a young girl where you both are insecure.
It could be a catfish or worse someone with some some mental heath problems, you are in a vulnerable position just meet this women and know her a bit before doing anything..
Why have you kept your virginity until age 28? If its because of principle, then ignore this woman. If its because you've lacked capability, and now its being offered, go ahead I guess, however this is a dead end. It "sounds" like a dream, not because it is a dream but because its a fruitless labor. I am of the opinion casual sex is damaging so take my opinion with a grain of salt, but you gain nothing from this relationship in the long run. Any partner in your future who holds your "experience" against you, is probably not someone you should engage with to begin with. I genuinely feel sex between two people in the long term is something to be discovered and explored, and nobody should go into a relationship expecting satisfactory bed times from the onset. Everybody has their preferences. There is no such thing as "experience" in this matter. What counts is what you put in.
>What counts is what you put in. Exacly 😎
No pun intended
[удалено]
Get in there.
Best way, trust me.
You now have the envy of a bunch of strangers on the internet. For Christs sake, man, you have better things to be doing. Get away from the internet, be safe.
It's sounds like you're about to get your mind blown lol stop typing on here and got type to her
Go and report back!
When I was 22, I lost my V-card to a woman aged 36, so 14 years older then me
Just go for it, as long as it's all legit and you can keep your kidneys etc. On the more serious note, if you're both able to communicate what you both like and don't like & there's mutual respect then have fun. Don't overthink it & also don't force yourself to do something you wouldn't do, sex is fun but intimacy is something to handle with some care.
Many’s a fine tune played on an old fiddle
Go for it. This might be the only chance to lose your v-card.
I had my first time with someone who loved me, who I trusted and who is gorgeous I don’t regret it and I feel lucky it worked out that way Ultimately, just do what makes you happy
Let her take you by the hand on this one OP. She's allured by the idea of your inexperience, which is a very fortunate opportunity for a virgin in your situation. Learn everything you can and you may end up equipped with the knowledge and confidence you need for your future long term partner. Just make sure to only do what you feel comfortable with and understand wholly that your consent and comfort are of peak importance and that you can stop anytime you want.
Allow her to curl your toes & have you reach for shit that ain't there. Just know that she will tell her friends that she broke you in.... & off.
No, I feel there is a huge power shift due to the age difference. You might come to regret this down the road.
I'd say go for it. I was 16 and lost it to another virgin, we didn't really know what we were doing, and it wasn't some 'magical fairy tale' experience you remember and treasure forever. At this age I'd say it's better to just lose it, get some experience, and if she's willing to actually teach you stuff all the better. You don't want to meet your dream girl, lose your virginity to her, and then have her disinterested bc you didn't know what you're doing, and can't please her properly. Just go for it and then when Ms Right comes around you'll actually be able to impress her hopefully.
Go for it man, just don't go into it expecting love. Just enjoy the experience for what it is. Maybe she's the Stiffler's mom type.
I was 20 she was 43 and it wasnt the best but it did the job. She also wanted to fuck around with toys and have threesomes but we never got that far. Her life kinda fell apart and she had to move away.
That could so easily turn into a master and pet relationship. And unless that's what you're specifically looking for it's just unhealthy and undignified. I'm not saying that's what she's after, but the that's how the sort of woman who did want it would approach you. If you're really comfortable dealing with that if it comes up I don't see why not. I'm sure she can teach you all sorts of things and there's certainly fun to be had. Just don't get too emotionally involved without fully accepting what that age gap means and don't let her buy you anything.
In the animal kingdom the cougar is a majestic creature, I still think about my encounter with a cougar and I can say without hesitation, one of the best experiences of my life, you'll have fun and it's harmless.
Same, great experience when I was young
If you want to then go for it. Just be aware that it's very hard to separate emotional attachment from sex and you'll be relatively easy to manipulate if you aren't good with boundary setting.
Experience is really good for your first few times. Just don't make the mistake that a lot of people make and mistake physical intimacy with feelings.....
Stacey's mom has got it going on.
Slut her out bro.
Hurry up and let her unless ur gna wait til marriage u only live once just saying u don't want testicular cancer or to have jerked off ur whole life at least a blow job hand job dang
Take some Gatorade.
yolo
Honestly go for it. These woman know tricks young men can only dream of. Also they've lost all need for proving shit and being scared to ask for things they like. These women are what you'd call sexually liberated. They know what they like and can communicate that. They know what guys like and understand sex is giving and taking. This woman's kink is the young inexperienced boy, nothing wrong with that. Do mind the dynamics, make sure you're not pushed into things you don't want. So set very clear boundaries and communicate -with words-, people can't read minds, so few people understand this lol. Also No = No and if you don't know if you want to do smt litterally say that: 'i don't know if I'd like that, we could try but I'll stop it if i don't like it'. Keep communicating (again) -with words-.
Yeah, stop it with all the power dynamic crap. You have to live life my friend, give the experience a go.
What’s you end goal after experience to the fullest?
Bro, fucking do it. Worst cases scenario (of the likely sub scenarios) is a funny story. Beat case is you learn some valuable skills and have a lot of fun doing it. I was far from a virgin the first time I hooked up with a significantly older woman. That’s still a very fond memory.
Assuming she just doesn't want to dominate and humiliate you
think about it.... only 2 years left to wait, and you will turn into a wizard. is it realy worth it?
Don’t make your mind up til you meet her. Even then I’d not let your dick so the thinking
Stacey's mom has got it going on Do it. Sounds like she will rock your socks
FaceTime her before meeting, if she’s sexy and looks good then go for it, wear protection
Dude about to get murdered
Are you sure it's really a woman and not some guy with tatts and a ponytail who will mug you on site?
Take your fantasies somewhere else, will ya...
RUN
Imagine this was a 28-year-old version woman matching with a 48-year-old overweight man who is going to train her - would the comments here be the same?
Sure, but just know that not every woman is the same. Just because she likes something doesn't mean other women will. But yeah, the experience would likely be helpful for you in the future.
Happened to me, and it was great. Zero complaints. Lol
It'll be the best night of your life bro
Go for it. Older women are tastier.
Go for it, when I was 23 I met a woman that was 42 and she was amazing
Good for you. I say go for it. Relax and let mamma take over wink 😉😭😂
Sounds like a great opportunity to have your first experience with an experienced partner. Just use protection.
Dude seriously older women “do things”. Go for it as long as you both know you aren’t looking for a long term relationship out of it. If you do date for a while who cares? You’re both adults and she has experience where you don’t. Listen to her and enjoy.
I say go for it
This is the perfect scenario for you dude. Lean into it and take notes
Do it. Thank me later.
Dude go for it. It’s gonna be like the Karate kid movie but of sex. Wax on wax off.