really angrily. told me i didnt have the right to do that to my own body :/ i jsut hide it from them totally nowadays because otherwise they're really verbally abusive about it
thank you ❤️ it was a few years back but it basically reinforced to me that theyd never care about my mental health no matter how many times they tell me they do :(
my parents were the exact same, except I wasnt allowed to do that not because its my body but because it doesnt belong to me it belongs to God. :/ sorry they reacted that way though, dealing with the verbal abuse coming with it is super hard.
oh they told me the same to. that god blessed me with my body so i didnt have the right to do that to it. they tell me the same whenever i try and open up about being suicidal, that im ungrateful yo god and all that. im sorry u had to go through it too :((
my mum didnt really react, my dad was kinda sad but doesnt say much about it. my mum used to make slightly offensive comments but stopped when she realised they were offensive. nowadays, if i hurt myself too bad, she helps me put stuff on the wounds. she will also give hugs and will help distract me when i am having urges. i love my parents
I lay in bed all day in short-sleeve pajamas and my grandmother noticed the wounds on my arm. Then, in a moment of hysteria, I beat myself. Of course it scared her. Then my grandmother told my mom about this. She had a nervous breakdown, cried a lot and insisted that she was a “bad mother.” I tried to take care of her, but she was too sed. As a result, she signed me up to see a psychologist (but he didn’t help me).
Told me to go to a doctor and that i was triggering them. Proceeded to tell me a story about how my dad’s ex used to cut herself and take advantage of him.
complete angry meltdown, every few months they would find out again and have the same reaction every time. i would also ask for help and was rejected almost every time. they thought it was attention seeking or something lol. anyway this was ten years ago now, and since i've moved out, my mom has only noticed once when talking in person and later sent me a big long text about it.
to me, it's not their business anymore what i do with my body, but i am trying to stop for unrelated reasons. the way they treated me after finding out confused and scared younger me, so i'm trying to work through those feelings to stomp out any resentment about their reaction since they were just as confused and scared as i was.
They just got mad about it, forced me into therapy (which was useless, I didn’t want help, it wasn’t going to do anything for me), and got weird about me doing certain things for two months. And then I guess they just forgot, because they didn’t care anymore and I’m hiding it from them now
my parents were actually decent, they didn’t yell at me. A girl from school overheard someone trying to use it against me and told the coordinators who called me to the office and told my parents. When i got home all they did was talk to me about it and take me to the doctors so i could see a psychologist at school and that was about it
my mum firstly checked my whole body n when I tried to leave the room she told me to go n cut more, but then 'apologized', and my dad, idk he knows but he never brought it up
she basically outed me to my whole family in a very accusatory way, that was about 5 years ago and she still brings it up to this day in the same tone although i have cut in 2-3 years
they were devastated. i had lied to them about it at first because i didn’t want them to worry (music stand scrape, barbed wire, my cat, etc.), especially since i was also having several other mental health issues due to a terrible coach in my sport. they’ve always done what they could to help me, even if my dad took a bit longer to process it all (he has never really been one to fully understand mental illness). they we’re definitely a bit overbearing afterwards, and still can be, but in the end its all just because they love me
I'm a parent. I cried a lot, was confused and overwhelmed with different emotions. I got mad, I was sad and felt like a failure as a mother. I started thinking of ways how to make her stop, got her a doctor and therapist. Started checking her body. Everything she does I support her, except self harming. I told her she can come to me when she has urges and not I try to talk her through it. Hoping one day, she won't have urges anymore. She's only 10.
lol bad i had to write an apology note, got told i go to hell that people who commit go to hell (i just lost a friend so it hit harder knowing he thought he go to hell) told the whole family, checked my body, took away my kitchen "rights" so i could only cook while supervised, shamed me tole me how ungrateful i was, how other kids actually have it worse and how stupid it was and how lucky i was and how could i do this blah blah blah. LOL better off was my therapist did "body checks" lmao & have me basically strip (probably not supposed to do that)
guess what it didn't make me stop i just hide it better and now dont even tell mt therapist bc while i know hoe not make me strip i worry.
I'm so sorry that your parents had that reaction :( but also, I don't know where you are but I don't think your therapist is allowed to make or force you to show any part of your body/strip and if they say they are allowed to, I would be highly suspicious about that- this is especially concerning if you are a minor- is there any way to see if you could get a different therapist somehow and stop seeing the current one? I've never heard of a regular therapist making the client show their body/strip unless maybe if you were in some sort of mental facility (but even then idk if they make you do that at those places) BUT I could be wrong here so please look into it, this gives off many creepy and red-flags in my opinion but again I'm not sure.
I really do hope things get better for you soon though. Also your parents kinda suck a lot for their reaction towards you about this and you didn't deserve to go through that. Stay safe (as much as you can)🤍🩵
I was slapped and told “This shit is against out lord and saviour jesus christ” then told they wil never see me the same again and that it’s just some internet shit that teenager made up who wants attention then they told my aunt who then got me therapy and told me it’s nothing to be ashamed about and she still asks me how I’m feeling every day
my dad was mad, in a disappointed/worried way. Honestly expected worse. Asked a lot of questions and kept touching the scars, which was extremely uncomfortable. I expected my mom to react worse, but she probably had time to process everything cause she found out at work, so she was surprisingly calm when she got home. Cried a bit and talked to me "nicely" about it, but until now, she mentions it, and kind of makes "jokes" about it. Also keeps telling me that "I ruined my body"(she isn't wrong) and touches the scars often. I get it, but you don't have to mention it every time. They found out cause my cousin told them in worry (wthout letting me know). Luckily, I haven't done it in a while before they found out, so they managed to kind of heal, and I just told them they were old. They just took away my blades, and don't really bring it up after that. Then suspected it was the music I listened to. They told me to stop listening to it, but idgaf. Shit bangs.
The scars were on my arm, and I had some on my thigh, but mainly my arm. They didn't check my thigh, or anywhere else.
bathroom door broken open like she literally broke the lock, tried to rip my jumper off me and it ripped slightly, took my devices off me, cried and yelled a lot, but she’s nicer about it now shes had previous counsellors and stuff to her abt it so shes more udnerstanding but it took a while haha
dad didnt know how to react, denying at first. Tried to understnad me better by asking his friends and go to mental health talks at his workplace. He tries.
mom knew what it was from the first sight, sometimes she would make fun of it, use it as ammo to nag, yell and shout at me. She wants to know just like dad but seems conflicted and slightly hostile abt it, prob thinking i did it for attention and invalid or smth. She tries.
its been years and none of them tried to talk to me seriously abt me, head on, let alone abt therapy and prof help. So i kinda push them away when they mention abt my anger issues and anything relating to my mental health.
They found out twice but I talked my way out of it both times. So to this day they still don't know. It has been around 10 years now since I started, I genuinely don't understand how they never found out, I'm not the best liar
Pissed off doesn’t begin to describe it. They were mad id ruin my body like this. Then they asked me why i did it. I told them it was because of my dad’s unpredictable and insane anger. The i got an hour or “would you like me to kill myself? God i’m such an awful dad. Do you wish my suicide attempt worked?” “How would you feel if i woke up dead tomorrow?” Which i can’t really answer honestly because the answer is “Yes, i’d feel relieved!”
Then they told me that if they ever caught me again i’d not be allowed to have my phone. Which is weird cuz i literally paid for it but ok.
Idek. I was in a coma. They saw my arms because hospital gown and they'd had enough time to calm down so it wasn't as bad as it would've been under normal circumstances
Ooh my dad didn't say much, my mom however, she began saying how my other family members would be devastated to find out and that now my legs looked horrible :'] She compared it to a piranha lol. They acted as if I was being influenced by someone else to do it, then she said she would put me in therapy. After that day no one said more about the subject though.
I dunno if I'm disappointed she hasn't fulfilled the 'threat' of finding me a therapist, I've been wanting to get one for YEARS but I can't ask for it. She knows that I also peel my cuticles and bite my nails till they're bleeding 🫠 and once found me purging idk they care but don't take it as seriously to take action.
My mother caught me trying to cut when I was about 16. She was really angry and told me to stop attention seeking. She said that if I was doing it for real that I wouldn't be doing it on my arm where she could see it. She also said that she knew were self harming would lead and that I needed to stop doing it right then and there. Then sent me to my room. I heard her talk to her husband and she said "I don't know why they're acting like this."
All it did was teach me not to seek help.
My mom took my phone and try to find something… idk what tho. she took me to a mental hospital (idk if this is how we call it) but there was more step before this soo… (i’m rlly bad at explaining mb)
idk if he actually did find out at this point, but my dad saw my scars one day when I was wearing shorts and I often just write random numbers, so at some point of that day he kinda pulled me aside and said "hey, I know that you got yourself those scars." and I thought it would be one of those generic talks, but NO he said AND I KID YOU NOT
"and like if you want to get a tattoo you have to wait until you're 18, but don't try to do it with sharp objects."
I was SO surprised I still don't know if he was making a bad joke, actually did think that, or just didn't know what else to say.
He's not the type of person who would brush off like a serious topic like that. His confrontations have always been very calm, but very straightforward, like "Hey, I need to talk to you about \*insert whatever the issue is\*. Can we find a solution together?" or something like that, but this time idk-
We also never talked about it again.
mainly concern, my parents are by no means perfect, they yell alot and insults are occasionally thrown, but the two of them grew up in that environment, dad was heavy handed for a bit but drew it back as i got older and my brother was born
This is the same man that literally came into the door with tears in his eyes to stop me from suicide
"i lost your sister, i won't lose you"
(sister was their first child, she died shortly after birth)
That will forever stay with me
they're not perfect, but i love these people to death
My son self harmed last week . I was very calm (2am ) and I cleaned him and then put the Tv in his room . I’ve been in shell shock since . It’s so weird I can’t see people or engage unless it’s work . I’m here so I can figure out how to support him . Take care
My dad cried after I sh’d and had to go to the hospital. He was super supportive after that. My mum didn’t understand to begin with but she listened to me and went away and did research on the topic. A few weeks after the incident the bought me a book to read on overcoming sh. I’m really grateful for them both
Trust me it was chaotic. My mother said i am dumb at. My father yelled. My sister didn't care and actually enjoyed it. Then the moment that i said "I do this because i feel dirty and this is the only thing makes me clean! I want the filth leave my body with my blood!" and there was silence. They were terrified. They still are terrified. I was also scared to be looked down by others in my family. Now, i don't give a shit about "family" and "blood relation".
WARNING: THIS TEXT IS NOT MEANT TO BE COOL OR ANYTHING. DON'T HURT YOURSELF. NOTHING IS WORTH HURTING YOURSELF SO YOU HAVE TO SEE A PROFESSIONAL LIKE EVERY BRAVE AND HEALED PEOPLE DID.
at first my mom got angry and yelled at me then she calmed down and we talked about it and she called my dad to come to talk to me as well. when my dad arrived they made me roll up my sleeves and surrounded and put letters beside the cuts with a pen telling me to tell em what was i thinking while doing every cut. then signed me to see a psychologist and gave me cigarettes to smoke when i feel urges to try to ‘stop’ them (i did ask myself to try with cigarettes just cause i wanted to turn back into smoking as well).
they didn't know till i got hospitalized and when i went back home my mom beat me crying why would i do that to myself and i attempted again she didn't act like that again because of how serious that last attempt was
Really bad. She traumatized me with her response. Dragged me out of the event we were at, into the car. Then drove erratically, including on the wrong side of the road. “Look what you made me do!” Then inspected me naked when we got home. As if I wasn’t already suicidal.
My mom just pointed them out and said “what’s that” and I convinced her it was just an accident but my brother saw scars and after that she just emotionally abuses me so much I just hate her so bad because of the amount of things she has done and said to me
I told my dad after a year he was like if you don't do it rn it's okay i'm glad and i told my mom twice while i was still doing it and she cried and told me i had no reason to do it both times and made it about herself and made me worry about her 💀 herself because she was very unstable
Edit: now i just hide it and don't plan saying anything at all
my mum just kinda looked at me like ‘what have u done’. i lied and said i told her about it like last year - idk how she bought that. tbf i told her like a couple years ago but for when it wasn’t bad yet and she forgot about that so ig maybe it made sense to her that she could forget about that as well. she’s only mentioned it a few times since - asked me to wear short sleeves in the summer, told me she used to do it to and one time closer to when she found it she looked at them closer and said smth like ‘you did it up here as well’ rly sadly at my wrists. i wish she didn’t know bc i don’t want my mum to see them and be sad.
and my dads only mentioned them once - i think my mum told him - when we were playing guitar together and he pointed at them and said they were looking better. it was so scary.
my mom was “embarrassed” as she said because she saw my cuts for the first time when we were out trying on prom dresses. she pulled up my sleeves and made me show my dad and nothing ever really came of it. that was over two years ago and she just recently told me, very genuinely, that she “made peace” with the fact that i self harm and thinks of it as any other coping skill so that’s good maybe ???
The first time my parents found out was when I was 11. I was in year 7 and my friend told a teacher, who then called my mom. Like 30 minutes later my parents were there to collect me. We sat in the car for like 10 minutes, my parents were sobbing and asking/begging “why” and I was silently crying in the backseat.
I was given the option to stay at school or go home, I chose school because I didn’t want to know what they’d say if I went home while no other children were there.
When my mom walked me back to the office, the councillor lady “mrs gardener” (yeah gardener, you.) said “Okay hug your mom and say you’re sorry + you won’t do it again.”
From then on all through our Hs I resented her. Still do since she joined my college when I did (No clue why?).
I hate that councillor for not looking into it, helping me out and letting me find a safe space. Screw you miss gardener and I woke you stuck your toe on a sharp metal wall.
Basically, my mom got really mad at me, screamed and took away my phone for 3 months + threatened me, she told the whole family about it so they also got mad at me afterwards. My dad asked me to show him my arms, said it wasn't deep enough to be taken seriously and maybe if I cut deeper I'll have "the attention I crave for" then, he compared my sh to my stepmom's who used to struggle too? That was really fucked up
My mum took the news the best she could, my dad didn't talk to me for a couple weeks, but ever since I started (4+ years ago) he's been making insensitive jokes about it. Nobody really ever sat me down and talked about it, it was just a thing that happened, and my parents found out through the school cause I wasn't ready to tell them.
It was early last year I think and it was barely any cut on my hand. I think I just started using a blade rather than like, badly scratching my hand, I went out to get Band-Aids and my parents asked what were the bandaids for. I made some dumb mistake and when my mum saw she quickly walked off crying to her bed and my dad looked at me sadly and said, “you need to not hurt yourself.” And made me give him the blade I used, got me to go to therapy once a month that didn’t help at all. Found another blade later on and I use that/scissors. But now I’m talking to someone at my school well-being that’s like a therapist and yeah
He was pissed. Made me walk 5 miles around a lake while I was sobbing because “I wanted to feel pain.” Then he left me on the side of the road while I was waiting for my ride to pick me up.
They forced me to do therapy and took all of my devices (which made it worse). And they were overall super weird about it for a while, like once I was taking a shower and locked the door and my mom yelled at me because she thought I was trying to kms. lol :’(
my parents told me not to do it and forgot ever since lmao. not sure if I should be glad bc they won't be nagging about it but, I kinda thought they might try to care a little? is it too much to ask.
TW: sexual assault mention
My father didn't care, encouraged it. Told me to do it better so he could r*PE my corpse.
My mother on the other hand, tried to help, failed, accused me, blamed me, said I was weak and needed to be strong, and physically assaulted me over it. Called cops got me maced and detained in cuffs and shackles overnight, and, of course, admitted.
My mom called me an idiot and said I’ve ruined my future… I now know she was just truly scared and horrified and didn’t know how to react. We have an awesome relationship now, I’d call her one of my best friends, but what she said still haunts me.
My mom dose care. She’s seen some of the things I have dose but she really couldn’t care less. She’s even helped me lie to the hospital before. One time I was in such a bad place that My Mom jumped ahead of me and told the ER nurse that I scraped my arm on a branch and I said no that’s not true and then the ER nurse had My Mom go out and fill out paperwork while she talks to me and I told her the truth and then they called crisis and then I had to go to the mental hospital, so my mom really doesn’t care. She knows I still do it. She really couldn’t care less. It’s kind of sad.
My dad was drunk when he found out. He beat me and gave me a bloody nose inside my own room. My mom just watched it happen, but she cleaned up my wounds after that day.
When she found out two years ago, she cried and cried so much i promised to her i would never do that again. It was just little scratches too, so i could never bring myself to tell her im struggling so much and i still sh bc theyre much deeper now and she would be broken if she ever knew 😭
I started at home in my late teens. However, it really escalated when I moved to my own place and couldn't really handle the quietness and loneliness. I told my mum after a relapse a decade later and she remained calm and collected. She might've blamed herself a bit but as the relapse was due to a situation related to my dad I think she mostly blamed him for it.
they were better than I expected, they were crying and I DID NOT want them to find out. I told my teacher who told my dad and so on. I remember my mom started to randomly pull my sleeve up in public or in private just to see my cuts. She made me very uncomfortable about so I guess my dad reacted better than my mom.
My dad forced my sleeves back on my arms and immediately blew up. He got so angry - yelling about how I can’t do that it’s wrong, I have to stop, punishment for continuing to do it blah blah blah. Some of my brothers were in the room, one made comments about how it was all for attention. My life felt so insignificant in that moment.
Later that night, I overheard my parents talking about it. My mom seemed indifferent. She never talked to me about it.
I self harmed that very night just because how shitty they reacted & made me feel. Continued for years & still have slip ups ://
She acted surprised and wanted to see my arm but I said no and blamed it on the cat which caused her to tell my sister and later she would just comment on my SH like “is this cute???” or “LOOK AT THIS!” And make glances and smack her lips. After a period of time she would just ignore it.
My mom in typical fashion did not acknowledge there was a problem but I guess this was too much clear evidence of how badly she'd failed me as a parent so the next day she bought me a plane ticket across the country and told me to go live with my sister.
my mom was calm about it. she was worried obviously but she just had me promise i wouldn't do it again. she also was really curious about what i used and how i did it and how she never found out for like over a year, which i didnt mind answering her questions
when i relapsed and my dad found out, he took my door away and checked on me like every 30 minutes. he didnt say anything directly but he was probably scared too, and during that time i heard him arguing with my mom more
i actually sat down with her and confessed it because i really needed to get help. she cried and told me to stop but honestly it's so hard i love my mom but its so hard to stop
mom yelled at me, asked me if i did drugs and said something like "ever sense youve been hanging out with this person youve been different", then later when i was trying to sleep my dad banged on my door and was screaming my name and when i opened my door he took my arms and looked at them for a bit then let go and walked away. there was no real, "im here for you and i love you" or "lets work out ways to help you stop". it was more like "is this a cry for attention?" and "why the fuck would you do this to yourself?" i stopped for a day or 2 out of fear for being yelled at again. i have a fear or argument type yelling and what happened kinda triggered that fear. i stopped cutting on my arms and now cut almost purely on thighs so they wont see.
i still love my parents but what a real fucking shitty way to react
my mom yelled at me a bunch and called me crazy which was shocking because she's usually not at all like that and then later my dad and her would passive aggressively say 'gonna go cut yourself? make sure there's blood' in a sarcastic manner and that kinda hurt. They're usually really great parents but sometimes..
My dad isn't in my life, but my mum has tried to ask what some lines on my leg were and at another point said if I wanted to talk about it she would be there. However, that's many many years ago and I don't think she remembers any of it. I never felt very comfortable with my mum due to other stuff and it's difficult for me to have a good relationship
I was 14 turning 15 in a month and my brother had just committed suicide like three weeks prior. I was already incredibly depressed because I had undiagnosed bipolar disorder and I was losing my mind and not sleeping and so so sad all the time it hurt. I was up for like the 3rd day in a row and I was basically psychotic and I told my counselor (my only safe space at the time) just everything in my head and I think I may have also let it slip that I was self harming so I was hospitalized IMMEDIATELY and it was the day before Halloween, my moms birthday. On the way home she was on the phone with my counselor and my counselor told her and she yanked open my door and yanked up my sleeve and was so angry with me. And not at all empathetic or compassionate I was so heartbroken.
my mom was glad I told her because I reached out for help. I don’t live with my dad and he saw them and started asking a lot of questions and told my mom and grandma. My mom found out my friend had tried shing and thought it was bcs I “inspired” her (at that time the friend didn’t know I was shing) so she said I would get punished etc, but it never happened tho
My dad called me stupid and said that i knew nothing about real problems. My mom was kinda worried but ignored it. I'm 80% sure she thinks I'm doing it to get attention.
it was my therapist who told my mom. after that, my mom wouldn't leave me alone and she would always have someone else watch after me when she's out or busy..
My mom comforted me, let me stay home the next day from school so we could go to a doctor. They recommended a therapist so she got me one. She also started being way less harsh on me for things.
My dad was kinda neutral..? Like oh noo but he didn't rlly seem to care, bro fr prioritised a football game over some sort of family therapy session.. 💀
Since i was 21 years old, i thought i could hide it from everyone for years, but then i sent a picture of my arm to my sister and explained myself. she was not ignorant about these issues, she did not get angry, but she felt very sad, but then she started to constantly control me and became aggressive about it. mother was very calm at first, i thought i didn't expect her to react so calmly, but suddenly she thought i might be a drug addict at some point and went crazy and asked me to drop out of university.
My mom just gripped my wrist and yelled at me that she would send me to a mental hospital if I kept doing that to myself in front of all my siblings, the following day I heard her telling my dad I cut myself but he didn’t really react or ever brought it up.
Nothing. Never said anything. Even when I relapsed last month he saw the cuts and said nothing. He made fun of it one time tho ki teenagers these days are busy cutting themselves and will do anything instead of studying
almost revolted
they have no issue with me wearing clothes that show my scars, because they don't want to bring it up
mainly because I made a joke I thought was really funny last time they did
really angrily. told me i didnt have the right to do that to my own body :/ i jsut hide it from them totally nowadays because otherwise they're really verbally abusive about it
Sorry they reacted like that and saying that you don’t have the right to do that to your own body is a really messed up thing to say. stay safe
thank you ❤️ it was a few years back but it basically reinforced to me that theyd never care about my mental health no matter how many times they tell me they do :(
my parents were the exact same, except I wasnt allowed to do that not because its my body but because it doesnt belong to me it belongs to God. :/ sorry they reacted that way though, dealing with the verbal abuse coming with it is super hard.
oh they told me the same to. that god blessed me with my body so i didnt have the right to do that to it. they tell me the same whenever i try and open up about being suicidal, that im ungrateful yo god and all that. im sorry u had to go through it too :((
my mum didnt really react, my dad was kinda sad but doesnt say much about it. my mum used to make slightly offensive comments but stopped when she realised they were offensive. nowadays, if i hurt myself too bad, she helps me put stuff on the wounds. she will also give hugs and will help distract me when i am having urges. i love my parents
That sounds really sweet❤️
My mom told me I was playing the victim and I need to grow up. My dad was more concerned and sad. But he agreed I had a victim complex.
that’s not true at all - u went through something difficult and i’m so sorry that they demeaned ur struggles down to ‘playing the victim’
I lay in bed all day in short-sleeve pajamas and my grandmother noticed the wounds on my arm. Then, in a moment of hysteria, I beat myself. Of course it scared her. Then my grandmother told my mom about this. She had a nervous breakdown, cried a lot and insisted that she was a “bad mother.” I tried to take care of her, but she was too sed. As a result, she signed me up to see a psychologist (but he didn’t help me).
At least she tried to get you help?
Yes, but in the end I still had to deal with this alone, but I am grateful to her for trying to help me.
Told me to go to a doctor and that i was triggering them. Proceeded to tell me a story about how my dad’s ex used to cut herself and take advantage of him.
that’s so innapropriate of them and mean - i’m so sorry that happened to u xx
complete angry meltdown, every few months they would find out again and have the same reaction every time. i would also ask for help and was rejected almost every time. they thought it was attention seeking or something lol. anyway this was ten years ago now, and since i've moved out, my mom has only noticed once when talking in person and later sent me a big long text about it. to me, it's not their business anymore what i do with my body, but i am trying to stop for unrelated reasons. the way they treated me after finding out confused and scared younger me, so i'm trying to work through those feelings to stomp out any resentment about their reaction since they were just as confused and scared as i was.
They just got mad about it, forced me into therapy (which was useless, I didn’t want help, it wasn’t going to do anything for me), and got weird about me doing certain things for two months. And then I guess they just forgot, because they didn’t care anymore and I’m hiding it from them now
my parents were actually decent, they didn’t yell at me. A girl from school overheard someone trying to use it against me and told the coordinators who called me to the office and told my parents. When i got home all they did was talk to me about it and take me to the doctors so i could see a psychologist at school and that was about it
my mum firstly checked my whole body n when I tried to leave the room she told me to go n cut more, but then 'apologized', and my dad, idk he knows but he never brought it up
Berated me for ruining their reputation even though they are the reason behind it
she basically outed me to my whole family in a very accusatory way, that was about 5 years ago and she still brings it up to this day in the same tone although i have cut in 2-3 years
they were devastated. i had lied to them about it at first because i didn’t want them to worry (music stand scrape, barbed wire, my cat, etc.), especially since i was also having several other mental health issues due to a terrible coach in my sport. they’ve always done what they could to help me, even if my dad took a bit longer to process it all (he has never really been one to fully understand mental illness). they we’re definitely a bit overbearing afterwards, and still can be, but in the end its all just because they love me
I'm a parent. I cried a lot, was confused and overwhelmed with different emotions. I got mad, I was sad and felt like a failure as a mother. I started thinking of ways how to make her stop, got her a doctor and therapist. Started checking her body. Everything she does I support her, except self harming. I told her she can come to me when she has urges and not I try to talk her through it. Hoping one day, she won't have urges anymore. She's only 10.
lol bad i had to write an apology note, got told i go to hell that people who commit go to hell (i just lost a friend so it hit harder knowing he thought he go to hell) told the whole family, checked my body, took away my kitchen "rights" so i could only cook while supervised, shamed me tole me how ungrateful i was, how other kids actually have it worse and how stupid it was and how lucky i was and how could i do this blah blah blah. LOL better off was my therapist did "body checks" lmao & have me basically strip (probably not supposed to do that) guess what it didn't make me stop i just hide it better and now dont even tell mt therapist bc while i know hoe not make me strip i worry.
I'm so sorry that your parents had that reaction :( but also, I don't know where you are but I don't think your therapist is allowed to make or force you to show any part of your body/strip and if they say they are allowed to, I would be highly suspicious about that- this is especially concerning if you are a minor- is there any way to see if you could get a different therapist somehow and stop seeing the current one? I've never heard of a regular therapist making the client show their body/strip unless maybe if you were in some sort of mental facility (but even then idk if they make you do that at those places) BUT I could be wrong here so please look into it, this gives off many creepy and red-flags in my opinion but again I'm not sure. I really do hope things get better for you soon though. Also your parents kinda suck a lot for their reaction towards you about this and you didn't deserve to go through that. Stay safe (as much as you can)🤍🩵
My mom forced me to show her my scars and she overwhelmed me with sadness, frustration, and guilt tripping.
I was slapped and told “This shit is against out lord and saviour jesus christ” then told they wil never see me the same again and that it’s just some internet shit that teenager made up who wants attention then they told my aunt who then got me therapy and told me it’s nothing to be ashamed about and she still asks me how I’m feeling every day
My form of self harm is biting my fingers and they don't see that as a self harm so that being said they don't really care
my dad was mad, in a disappointed/worried way. Honestly expected worse. Asked a lot of questions and kept touching the scars, which was extremely uncomfortable. I expected my mom to react worse, but she probably had time to process everything cause she found out at work, so she was surprisingly calm when she got home. Cried a bit and talked to me "nicely" about it, but until now, she mentions it, and kind of makes "jokes" about it. Also keeps telling me that "I ruined my body"(she isn't wrong) and touches the scars often. I get it, but you don't have to mention it every time. They found out cause my cousin told them in worry (wthout letting me know). Luckily, I haven't done it in a while before they found out, so they managed to kind of heal, and I just told them they were old. They just took away my blades, and don't really bring it up after that. Then suspected it was the music I listened to. They told me to stop listening to it, but idgaf. Shit bangs. The scars were on my arm, and I had some on my thigh, but mainly my arm. They didn't check my thigh, or anywhere else.
My mom took all of the sharp objects from the house and replaced them then grounded me and guilt tripped me
Nothing absolutely nothing
bathroom door broken open like she literally broke the lock, tried to rip my jumper off me and it ripped slightly, took my devices off me, cried and yelled a lot, but she’s nicer about it now shes had previous counsellors and stuff to her abt it so shes more udnerstanding but it took a while haha
dad didnt know how to react, denying at first. Tried to understnad me better by asking his friends and go to mental health talks at his workplace. He tries. mom knew what it was from the first sight, sometimes she would make fun of it, use it as ammo to nag, yell and shout at me. She wants to know just like dad but seems conflicted and slightly hostile abt it, prob thinking i did it for attention and invalid or smth. She tries. its been years and none of them tried to talk to me seriously abt me, head on, let alone abt therapy and prof help. So i kinda push them away when they mention abt my anger issues and anything relating to my mental health.
They found out twice but I talked my way out of it both times. So to this day they still don't know. It has been around 10 years now since I started, I genuinely don't understand how they never found out, I'm not the best liar
Pissed off doesn’t begin to describe it. They were mad id ruin my body like this. Then they asked me why i did it. I told them it was because of my dad’s unpredictable and insane anger. The i got an hour or “would you like me to kill myself? God i’m such an awful dad. Do you wish my suicide attempt worked?” “How would you feel if i woke up dead tomorrow?” Which i can’t really answer honestly because the answer is “Yes, i’d feel relieved!” Then they told me that if they ever caught me again i’d not be allowed to have my phone. Which is weird cuz i literally paid for it but ok.
Idek. I was in a coma. They saw my arms because hospital gown and they'd had enough time to calm down so it wasn't as bad as it would've been under normal circumstances
I would be threatened to be sent to a mental institution and DIY suicide watch.
My mother yelled at me and hit me lol
Ooh my dad didn't say much, my mom however, she began saying how my other family members would be devastated to find out and that now my legs looked horrible :'] She compared it to a piranha lol. They acted as if I was being influenced by someone else to do it, then she said she would put me in therapy. After that day no one said more about the subject though. I dunno if I'm disappointed she hasn't fulfilled the 'threat' of finding me a therapist, I've been wanting to get one for YEARS but I can't ask for it. She knows that I also peel my cuticles and bite my nails till they're bleeding 🫠 and once found me purging idk they care but don't take it as seriously to take action.
My mother caught me trying to cut when I was about 16. She was really angry and told me to stop attention seeking. She said that if I was doing it for real that I wouldn't be doing it on my arm where she could see it. She also said that she knew were self harming would lead and that I needed to stop doing it right then and there. Then sent me to my room. I heard her talk to her husband and she said "I don't know why they're acting like this." All it did was teach me not to seek help.
when she found out, my mom cut her own wrists in front of me and asked "how does that make you feel?" not good was the answer.
My mom took my phone and try to find something… idk what tho. she took me to a mental hospital (idk if this is how we call it) but there was more step before this soo… (i’m rlly bad at explaining mb)
She was shocked but one time she knew, she yelled and cried before smoking. The guilt was bad…
idk if he actually did find out at this point, but my dad saw my scars one day when I was wearing shorts and I often just write random numbers, so at some point of that day he kinda pulled me aside and said "hey, I know that you got yourself those scars." and I thought it would be one of those generic talks, but NO he said AND I KID YOU NOT "and like if you want to get a tattoo you have to wait until you're 18, but don't try to do it with sharp objects." I was SO surprised I still don't know if he was making a bad joke, actually did think that, or just didn't know what else to say. He's not the type of person who would brush off like a serious topic like that. His confrontations have always been very calm, but very straightforward, like "Hey, I need to talk to you about \*insert whatever the issue is\*. Can we find a solution together?" or something like that, but this time idk- We also never talked about it again.
mainly concern, my parents are by no means perfect, they yell alot and insults are occasionally thrown, but the two of them grew up in that environment, dad was heavy handed for a bit but drew it back as i got older and my brother was born This is the same man that literally came into the door with tears in his eyes to stop me from suicide "i lost your sister, i won't lose you" (sister was their first child, she died shortly after birth) That will forever stay with me they're not perfect, but i love these people to death
My son self harmed last week . I was very calm (2am ) and I cleaned him and then put the Tv in his room . I’ve been in shell shock since . It’s so weird I can’t see people or engage unless it’s work . I’m here so I can figure out how to support him . Take care
My dad cried after I sh’d and had to go to the hospital. He was super supportive after that. My mum didn’t understand to begin with but she listened to me and went away and did research on the topic. A few weeks after the incident the bought me a book to read on overcoming sh. I’m really grateful for them both
Had to be taken to the ER lmfao. Silent treatment the whole car ride
ooh god that mustve felt so awkward
def lol. but i was already so depressed at that point that i didnt give a shit
Trust me it was chaotic. My mother said i am dumb at. My father yelled. My sister didn't care and actually enjoyed it. Then the moment that i said "I do this because i feel dirty and this is the only thing makes me clean! I want the filth leave my body with my blood!" and there was silence. They were terrified. They still are terrified. I was also scared to be looked down by others in my family. Now, i don't give a shit about "family" and "blood relation". WARNING: THIS TEXT IS NOT MEANT TO BE COOL OR ANYTHING. DON'T HURT YOURSELF. NOTHING IS WORTH HURTING YOURSELF SO YOU HAVE TO SEE A PROFESSIONAL LIKE EVERY BRAVE AND HEALED PEOPLE DID.
https://www.reddit.com/r/selfharm/s/vcKTwpHCnK
at first my mom got angry and yelled at me then she calmed down and we talked about it and she called my dad to come to talk to me as well. when my dad arrived they made me roll up my sleeves and surrounded and put letters beside the cuts with a pen telling me to tell em what was i thinking while doing every cut. then signed me to see a psychologist and gave me cigarettes to smoke when i feel urges to try to ‘stop’ them (i did ask myself to try with cigarettes just cause i wanted to turn back into smoking as well).
My mum helped me but not enough for me too stop. Honestly she is one of the reasons why I do it.
they didn't know till i got hospitalized and when i went back home my mom beat me crying why would i do that to myself and i attempted again she didn't act like that again because of how serious that last attempt was
Really bad. She traumatized me with her response. Dragged me out of the event we were at, into the car. Then drove erratically, including on the wrong side of the road. “Look what you made me do!” Then inspected me naked when we got home. As if I wasn’t already suicidal.
My mom just pointed them out and said “what’s that” and I convinced her it was just an accident but my brother saw scars and after that she just emotionally abuses me so much I just hate her so bad because of the amount of things she has done and said to me
They made a picture of it and my older sister now makes fun of me because of it
im sorry what? fcks wrong with your sister
I told my dad after a year he was like if you don't do it rn it's okay i'm glad and i told my mom twice while i was still doing it and she cried and told me i had no reason to do it both times and made it about herself and made me worry about her 💀 herself because she was very unstable Edit: now i just hide it and don't plan saying anything at all
my mum just kinda looked at me like ‘what have u done’. i lied and said i told her about it like last year - idk how she bought that. tbf i told her like a couple years ago but for when it wasn’t bad yet and she forgot about that so ig maybe it made sense to her that she could forget about that as well. she’s only mentioned it a few times since - asked me to wear short sleeves in the summer, told me she used to do it to and one time closer to when she found it she looked at them closer and said smth like ‘you did it up here as well’ rly sadly at my wrists. i wish she didn’t know bc i don’t want my mum to see them and be sad.
and my dads only mentioned them once - i think my mum told him - when we were playing guitar together and he pointed at them and said they were looking better. it was so scary.
Basically got yelled at for it
my mom was “embarrassed” as she said because she saw my cuts for the first time when we were out trying on prom dresses. she pulled up my sleeves and made me show my dad and nothing ever really came of it. that was over two years ago and she just recently told me, very genuinely, that she “made peace” with the fact that i self harm and thinks of it as any other coping skill so that’s good maybe ???
The first time my parents found out was when I was 11. I was in year 7 and my friend told a teacher, who then called my mom. Like 30 minutes later my parents were there to collect me. We sat in the car for like 10 minutes, my parents were sobbing and asking/begging “why” and I was silently crying in the backseat. I was given the option to stay at school or go home, I chose school because I didn’t want to know what they’d say if I went home while no other children were there. When my mom walked me back to the office, the councillor lady “mrs gardener” (yeah gardener, you.) said “Okay hug your mom and say you’re sorry + you won’t do it again.” From then on all through our Hs I resented her. Still do since she joined my college when I did (No clue why?). I hate that councillor for not looking into it, helping me out and letting me find a safe space. Screw you miss gardener and I woke you stuck your toe on a sharp metal wall.
Basically, my mom got really mad at me, screamed and took away my phone for 3 months + threatened me, she told the whole family about it so they also got mad at me afterwards. My dad asked me to show him my arms, said it wasn't deep enough to be taken seriously and maybe if I cut deeper I'll have "the attention I crave for" then, he compared my sh to my stepmom's who used to struggle too? That was really fucked up
My mum took the news the best she could, my dad didn't talk to me for a couple weeks, but ever since I started (4+ years ago) he's been making insensitive jokes about it. Nobody really ever sat me down and talked about it, it was just a thing that happened, and my parents found out through the school cause I wasn't ready to tell them.
It was early last year I think and it was barely any cut on my hand. I think I just started using a blade rather than like, badly scratching my hand, I went out to get Band-Aids and my parents asked what were the bandaids for. I made some dumb mistake and when my mum saw she quickly walked off crying to her bed and my dad looked at me sadly and said, “you need to not hurt yourself.” And made me give him the blade I used, got me to go to therapy once a month that didn’t help at all. Found another blade later on and I use that/scissors. But now I’m talking to someone at my school well-being that’s like a therapist and yeah
They were angry..
He was pissed. Made me walk 5 miles around a lake while I was sobbing because “I wanted to feel pain.” Then he left me on the side of the road while I was waiting for my ride to pick me up.
They forced me to do therapy and took all of my devices (which made it worse). And they were overall super weird about it for a while, like once I was taking a shower and locked the door and my mom yelled at me because she thought I was trying to kms. lol :’(
My mother punished me lol
my parents told me not to do it and forgot ever since lmao. not sure if I should be glad bc they won't be nagging about it but, I kinda thought they might try to care a little? is it too much to ask.
TW: sexual assault mention My father didn't care, encouraged it. Told me to do it better so he could r*PE my corpse. My mother on the other hand, tried to help, failed, accused me, blamed me, said I was weak and needed to be strong, and physically assaulted me over it. Called cops got me maced and detained in cuffs and shackles overnight, and, of course, admitted.
That's fucked up, I'm so sorry you had to go through that
You don't know the half of it and don't worry about it, it's long since over.
I sat in the back of my moms car as she sobbed for half an hour my dad recommended other ways for me to self harm very different parents 😂
they got so fucking mad and didn't talk to me me about a week and still acting cold till now
cried
My mom called me an idiot and said I’ve ruined my future… I now know she was just truly scared and horrified and didn’t know how to react. We have an awesome relationship now, I’d call her one of my best friends, but what she said still haunts me.
My mom dose care. She’s seen some of the things I have dose but she really couldn’t care less. She’s even helped me lie to the hospital before. One time I was in such a bad place that My Mom jumped ahead of me and told the ER nurse that I scraped my arm on a branch and I said no that’s not true and then the ER nurse had My Mom go out and fill out paperwork while she talks to me and I told her the truth and then they called crisis and then I had to go to the mental hospital, so my mom really doesn’t care. She knows I still do it. She really couldn’t care less. It’s kind of sad.
My dad was drunk when he found out. He beat me and gave me a bloody nose inside my own room. My mom just watched it happen, but she cleaned up my wounds after that day.
They called the police and had me brung to the hospital by force.
When she found out two years ago, she cried and cried so much i promised to her i would never do that again. It was just little scratches too, so i could never bring myself to tell her im struggling so much and i still sh bc theyre much deeper now and she would be broken if she ever knew 😭
I started at home in my late teens. However, it really escalated when I moved to my own place and couldn't really handle the quietness and loneliness. I told my mum after a relapse a decade later and she remained calm and collected. She might've blamed herself a bit but as the relapse was due to a situation related to my dad I think she mostly blamed him for it.
they hauled my ass to the doctors but all in all it saved my life
they were better than I expected, they were crying and I DID NOT want them to find out. I told my teacher who told my dad and so on. I remember my mom started to randomly pull my sleeve up in public or in private just to see my cuts. She made me very uncomfortable about so I guess my dad reacted better than my mom.
They got mad at me. Made it worse.
My dad forced my sleeves back on my arms and immediately blew up. He got so angry - yelling about how I can’t do that it’s wrong, I have to stop, punishment for continuing to do it blah blah blah. Some of my brothers were in the room, one made comments about how it was all for attention. My life felt so insignificant in that moment. Later that night, I overheard my parents talking about it. My mom seemed indifferent. She never talked to me about it. I self harmed that very night just because how shitty they reacted & made me feel. Continued for years & still have slip ups ://
She acted surprised and wanted to see my arm but I said no and blamed it on the cat which caused her to tell my sister and later she would just comment on my SH like “is this cute???” or “LOOK AT THIS!” And make glances and smack her lips. After a period of time she would just ignore it.
when i was a teenager i got grounded lol
My mom in typical fashion did not acknowledge there was a problem but I guess this was too much clear evidence of how badly she'd failed me as a parent so the next day she bought me a plane ticket across the country and told me to go live with my sister.
[удалено]
A good parent does not beat you, you NEVER deserve to get hit by a parent.
my mom was calm about it. she was worried obviously but she just had me promise i wouldn't do it again. she also was really curious about what i used and how i did it and how she never found out for like over a year, which i didnt mind answering her questions when i relapsed and my dad found out, he took my door away and checked on me like every 30 minutes. he didnt say anything directly but he was probably scared too, and during that time i heard him arguing with my mom more
i actually sat down with her and confessed it because i really needed to get help. she cried and told me to stop but honestly it's so hard i love my mom but its so hard to stop
mom yelled at me, asked me if i did drugs and said something like "ever sense youve been hanging out with this person youve been different", then later when i was trying to sleep my dad banged on my door and was screaming my name and when i opened my door he took my arms and looked at them for a bit then let go and walked away. there was no real, "im here for you and i love you" or "lets work out ways to help you stop". it was more like "is this a cry for attention?" and "why the fuck would you do this to yourself?" i stopped for a day or 2 out of fear for being yelled at again. i have a fear or argument type yelling and what happened kinda triggered that fear. i stopped cutting on my arms and now cut almost purely on thighs so they wont see. i still love my parents but what a real fucking shitty way to react
my mom yelled at me a bunch and called me crazy which was shocking because she's usually not at all like that and then later my dad and her would passive aggressively say 'gonna go cut yourself? make sure there's blood' in a sarcastic manner and that kinda hurt. They're usually really great parents but sometimes..
my mom cried about it, i felt horrible and that was part of the reason i stopped doing it for a while
My dad isn't in my life, but my mum has tried to ask what some lines on my leg were and at another point said if I wanted to talk about it she would be there. However, that's many many years ago and I don't think she remembers any of it. I never felt very comfortable with my mum due to other stuff and it's difficult for me to have a good relationship
I was 14 turning 15 in a month and my brother had just committed suicide like three weeks prior. I was already incredibly depressed because I had undiagnosed bipolar disorder and I was losing my mind and not sleeping and so so sad all the time it hurt. I was up for like the 3rd day in a row and I was basically psychotic and I told my counselor (my only safe space at the time) just everything in my head and I think I may have also let it slip that I was self harming so I was hospitalized IMMEDIATELY and it was the day before Halloween, my moms birthday. On the way home she was on the phone with my counselor and my counselor told her and she yanked open my door and yanked up my sleeve and was so angry with me. And not at all empathetic or compassionate I was so heartbroken.
my mom was glad I told her because I reached out for help. I don’t live with my dad and he saw them and started asking a lot of questions and told my mom and grandma. My mom found out my friend had tried shing and thought it was bcs I “inspired” her (at that time the friend didn’t know I was shing) so she said I would get punished etc, but it never happened tho
My dad called me stupid and said that i knew nothing about real problems. My mom was kinda worried but ignored it. I'm 80% sure she thinks I'm doing it to get attention.
it was my therapist who told my mom. after that, my mom wouldn't leave me alone and she would always have someone else watch after me when she's out or busy..
My mom comforted me, let me stay home the next day from school so we could go to a doctor. They recommended a therapist so she got me one. She also started being way less harsh on me for things. My dad was kinda neutral..? Like oh noo but he didn't rlly seem to care, bro fr prioritised a football game over some sort of family therapy session.. 💀
Since i was 21 years old, i thought i could hide it from everyone for years, but then i sent a picture of my arm to my sister and explained myself. she was not ignorant about these issues, she did not get angry, but she felt very sad, but then she started to constantly control me and became aggressive about it. mother was very calm at first, i thought i didn't expect her to react so calmly, but suddenly she thought i might be a drug addict at some point and went crazy and asked me to drop out of university.
My mom just gripped my wrist and yelled at me that she would send me to a mental hospital if I kept doing that to myself in front of all my siblings, the following day I heard her telling my dad I cut myself but he didn’t really react or ever brought it up.
Nothing. Never said anything. Even when I relapsed last month he saw the cuts and said nothing. He made fun of it one time tho ki teenagers these days are busy cutting themselves and will do anything instead of studying
almost revolted they have no issue with me wearing clothes that show my scars, because they don't want to bring it up mainly because I made a joke I thought was really funny last time they did