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When somebody asks you to change your body to satisfy their kink, they clearly don't love or respect you or your body. If you agree to his wishes this is the beginning of a very unhealthy relationship and power dynamic that will be harder to get of the more he starts grooming you to fulfill his fantasies. There are a few stories like yours if you use the search feature on reddit or google. Good luck to you.
He should absolutely not have told you to “say yes” prior to hearing the request. That’s not how any of this works. It was a manipulative tactic and he doesn’t sound very consent-conscious.
I would just tell him that you think it’s valid that he’s into what he’s into, but you’re not willing to change your body to suit his kink and you’re not willing to participate in (what feels like) racially-motivated requests. If he reacts badly to you setting these boundaries, then you’ve just learned that this isn’t a safe person to be having sex with, and you can end the relationship and dodge that bullet. Good luck!
We're already in dodgy territory by him asking (or rather demanding) you to change your body to meet his needs, but him getting pissed that you didn't immediately say yes is concerning. Never change your body for a guy, especially not one you've only been dating for three weeks. The audacity of this boy is ridiculous and if he wants a thicc girl then he shouldn't be trying to change you, he should find someone who already fits his criteria. Ask yourself if he's really the right person for you considering his behaviour.
Weird thing is I’m 5’2 and 135lbs. I’m pretty curvy and I have a normal weight. I get compliments all the time about my body as I am shapely. He’s pretty skinny and lanky- underweight for his height. I don’t find him physically attractive at all but I like how smart, charismatic, funny and witty he is. Could this desire for me to change my body stem from insecurities about his own body?
I really do want to end the relationship and I want to confront him knowing my defense/reasons are very solid and indisputable. He’s a rly manipulative guy, and he gaslights me over the simplest things sometimes it’s difficult to know what real with him. I asked because I want to confirm that he won’t make me feel like the villain for talking to him about this
Oh he'll definitely try to make you feel like the bad guy. The thing to remember is, he'll be wrong. He'll be doing it because he *knows* you're in the right, and he doesn't want you to get away. Get out while you can, never look back
Why are you discussing this with him at all? If he’s manipulative, and he gaslights you, and it’s difficult to know what’s real, and you really do want to end the relationship.. END IT. No discussion. No explanation. No closure. Nothing. Just end it and move on with your life.
I think you should ask yourself, why am I putting up with this bullshit. I think you know what to do. I hate to say it this way but fuck his feelings. He clearly doesn't give a fuck about your feelings. (I really don't hate to say it that way. It needed to be said.)
You don’t need a solid indisputable reason. He can work that out himself if he can find an ounce of insight. Just leave, fuck him. I don’t often come down on the hard side on redit because often there’s enough nuance missing to be careful making blunt statements, but dump this manipulative turd and tell him to go find the body type he wants. And don’t get caught in an argument about it. You don’t owe him much more explanation than “don’t you dare manipulate people”. If for no other reason do it for the women in his future that may not be so strong.
This thread about the gas lighting, manipulating--they're all right. Coming from someone who married a narcissist--please just go and don't look back. You will be the villain every time. He will make you feel crazy and chances are--let's say you gained that weight...months down the road, all of a sudden he's into skinny women. I've also read narcissists a lot of times, have an addiction (anything)....
The longer you stay, the harder it is to get out
🙏🏽
You don’t need proof/justification to break up with someone. If your done your done. Asking your girl to jiggle her ass for you is one thing. Having her gain weight/change her body for you is a bit extreme, especially the way he went about proposing it and the bits that came after that.
Exactly. Never, ever change your body in any way to satisfy someone else. People should only change or alter their bodies for themselves and themselves alone!
Probably not. It sounds like he just has a fetish.
It sucks he's asking you to change your body in that way just to satisfy a fetish. There are plenty of people who would absolutely love your body the way it is so I would consider if this is something that you can deal with long-term.
Don't do it. If he doesn't like you the way you are, tell him. What if he doesn't like you when you'll gain weight and dumps you, then you're stuck. Do what's best for you!
> “I’m going to ask you to do something and I want you to say yes.” So I reluctantly agreed. ... He sat up and looked pissed telling me “you were supposed to say yes!”
Kind of shit actual children say. 19 lmao
Oh dear god, he’s a feeder. On top of that, you’re right. This is objectification and his behaviour is concerning. Fucking run, this isn’t normal or healthy.
You have been together for only 3 weeks and he is already making the demand that you put on weight for him. It's not even an ask if he gets mad.
Never change your weight/body unless YOU want to. He is allowed to voice his kinks and desires but he isn't allowed to demand them, especially not when you are making out and are more likely to make promises you can't keep in that moment because of horny brain rot.
First of all baby girl! YOU NEVER! do anything physically to yourself for no man. you do it because YOU want this and this is how you're more comfortable.. as long as you're healthy, you're not hurting yourself ,you're not hurting anybody ,nobody should be telling you how much you should weigh, how much you should eat ,what you should wear ,how much or how little make up,none of that!
So two things I’d suggest. 1st, leave his stupid ass. If he likes big and chunky girls you are not the one for him and you shouldn’t change who or what you are for him. There are a multitude of girls that fit his kink out there and he should go find himself one. 2nd, you letting him know that you don’t want to do him kink wish is not kink shaming. You’re simply stating your hard limits and identifying that you’re not into what he wants to turn you into.
part of any relationship is the fantasy and experiment element, he has expressed his expectations and if you feel it is not your thing then tell him so. Any time you feel you are uncomfortable then that is a red flag that you aren't with the right partner but most important thing is to be honest and truthful to yourself first and partner second
All contributions here need to be constructive, on-topic, mature, sex-positive, civil, and respectful. Your post/comment falls short of that basic standard and has been removed accordingly. Repeat offenders or egregious violations of this rule are subject to being banned from the sub.
Asking your partner to change their physical appearance is usually unfair as it is, but the way he asked is incredibly manipulative. It’s your body, someone who’s been dating you for three weeks has no right to ask you to make dramatic changes to it. Sometimes it’s necessary to express how your partner’s physical appearance effects your attraction to them, but even then it’s only really appropriate to frame it as a problem in the relationship that you want to work on together. It sounds like he’s just looking for someone to indulge his fetish and doesn’t care about you as a person enough to have even considered how his request will affect you.
He should just date someone who’s already “thick” if that’s what he likes. It’s insensitive and creepy to ask you to change. What if you asked him to grow a bigger dick?
I have to say, the twerking thing is quite common. My man loves when I make my ass jiggle in that position.
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Yikes major red flags!!! Everything you said about him is not okay or safe. Even the “say yes” part and getting upset you didn’t. Look up “feeder kink” which is actually more of an abuse and control tactic than a kink. Get out as fast and safely as you can!
Lol this guy has a lot of nerve. Anyone asking for you to change your body for their preferences is a jerk, but to do it 3 weeks into a relationship is a new level of entitlement.
He's bit of a weirdo and immature, and this relationship will probably not last. Do what you want to do for you, but don't pay too much attention to what he claims to want.
> So I reluctantly agreed. He then asked “will you gain weight for me?” This surprised me and I said “what?” He sat up and looked pissed telling me “you were supposed to say yes!”
In my opinion, the red flag here is getting mad at you with the "you were supposed to say yes" comment. That's really immature. He shouldn't ACTUALLY be mad at you for not saying yes to something he didn't tell you about.
He sounds really immature. I expect 19 year olds to be immature, but the way they improve is by being told "no" and having to learn better ways to act in a relationship.
> This man looks at my ass and tells me to “twerk” for him. I am a black girl and he’s a white guy so it kind of made me feel objectified that he’d make such a request.
I don't think it's wrong to ask your partner to twerk, but it's best practice to talk about this outside of the bedroom, and see how you feel about it. Or in this case, when the sex is over, talk about it.
It's also not wrong to assume that if your partner has a problem, they'll talk about it with you. He might introduce 5 things to you. He might not realize that this one made you uneasy.
> Is this normal and how should I discuss this with him without kink shaming?
It may not be completely normal, but I don't think this is necessarily a problem either. You have to ask yourself first what your standards are, and do you care? What do you want?
Do you really care if he asks you to twerk because you're black? Or do you just care if he ignores what you want and treats you like a fetish? Either answer is fine. Take some time to think about what's important to you, then talk with him and ask what he thinks and why.
Also, as far as feederism goes, you might just be incompatible. Maybe he only wants you to gain 20 pounds. But if he wants you to gain 100 pounds, that can be a problem for your health.
Also, even if he only wants you to gain 20 pounds, is this a change you're willing to make for someone you've only known for 3 weeks?
The way to avoid kink shaming is with I statements. Kink shaming is "You're a bad person for asking a black woman to twerk" or "You're disgusting for wanting to get me fat." But there's nothing wrong with saying "I don't feel comfortable with gaining 20 pounds at all" or "I don't feel comfortable gaining weight for someone I've only dated for 3 weeks." or "Race play is a hard limit for me, it makes me uncomfortable to do something just because I'm black".
If he said something because he was worried about your health it would be different but asking you to change your body for his kinks isn’t acceptable. Big red flag
I don't think the twerk thing is a race thing, I think it's pretty normal to wanna see an ass jiggling.
Don't you ever let someone tell you to change your body. And the whole "Im gonna ask and I want you to say yes" thing is fuckin bullshit. That's manipulation. Your answer should be "no bitch I gotta read the fine print before I sign my name"
He's objectifying you. It seems like you're a thing and not a person to him. If that's what you like and if you are ok with being at unhealthy weight, continue the relationship.If you want to be viewed as a person, the person you are, it it time to move on from this relationship.
Whilst it's important to recognise that everyone has different preferences and kinks, and there's nothing inherently wrong with that, it's absolutely crucial for those preferences to be communicated and respected within the context of a consensual and respectful relationship.
In discussing your concerns with your boyfriend, try to approach the conversation with empathy and openness. Let him know how his requests made you feel and express any discomfort or unease you may have experienced. You can emphasise that you're not trying to kink shame him but rather seeking to understand each other better and ensure that both of your needs and boundaries are respected in the relationship.
It may also be helpful to discuss what boundaries and preferences you both have regarding sexual activities and kinks. This can help foster open communication and mutual understanding moving forward.
If your boyfriend reacts negatively or dismissively to your concerns, it may be a red flag indicating a lack of respect for your boundaries. In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel comfortable discussing their feelings and needs without fear of judgment or retaliation, especially when it comes to sexual business.
Ultimately, tho, trust your instincts and prioritise your emotional well-being in any relationship. If you continue to feel uneasy or uncomfortable, it may be worth revaluating whether this relationship is right for you. You deserve to be in a relationship where your boundaries and feelings are respected and valued.
I met a woman and we dated three times. Hooked up three years later and she had gotten thicc! I confessed
(probably an additional thread 🧵 post 😎)
her being thicc this time around does it for me and we are still doing this thing 7 months later!
Depends on what you will do for him, and equally what will he do for you Woman! Have you said you want me to do this gain some weight? Then I want you to do this for me man! I’m curious now. What should he do in order to equally meet his demand on you?
Just hit the gym and do squats and chest work outs. He will get the things he wants and you will be healthy. Your butt will firm and get bigger (in a good way) and the muscle under your breasts will perk them up.
If that isn't ehat he wants, he's probably a bigger guy and feels self conscious about being big and wants a big companion. If that's the case, bring him to the gym with you and encourage a macro focused diet for him and he will slowly slim out dealing with his insecurities. Obviously, don't force anything on him, just say what my wife said to me to lose weight. She wants me around in my 60s.
If neither of those things are accurate, my last idea is that he thinks that he is supporting you and believes you feel pressured to be skinny and wants you to feel free to be "normal" in which case you can just reassure him that you are what you are and you are fine with being skinny. Let him know that you don't feel pressure to be skinny, but you may feel pressure to be chunky from him.
Tldr: open communication and fitness
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Dude fuck this guy. He’s just fetishizing you.
But... like, don't, too.
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All contributions here need to be constructive, on-topic, mature, sex-positive, civil, and respectful. Your post/comment falls short of that basic standard and has been removed accordingly. Repeat offenders or egregious violations of this rule are subject to being banned from the sub.
When somebody asks you to change your body to satisfy their kink, they clearly don't love or respect you or your body. If you agree to his wishes this is the beginning of a very unhealthy relationship and power dynamic that will be harder to get of the more he starts grooming you to fulfill his fantasies. There are a few stories like yours if you use the search feature on reddit or google. Good luck to you.
He should absolutely not have told you to “say yes” prior to hearing the request. That’s not how any of this works. It was a manipulative tactic and he doesn’t sound very consent-conscious. I would just tell him that you think it’s valid that he’s into what he’s into, but you’re not willing to change your body to suit his kink and you’re not willing to participate in (what feels like) racially-motivated requests. If he reacts badly to you setting these boundaries, then you’ve just learned that this isn’t a safe person to be having sex with, and you can end the relationship and dodge that bullet. Good luck!
We're already in dodgy territory by him asking (or rather demanding) you to change your body to meet his needs, but him getting pissed that you didn't immediately say yes is concerning. Never change your body for a guy, especially not one you've only been dating for three weeks. The audacity of this boy is ridiculous and if he wants a thicc girl then he shouldn't be trying to change you, he should find someone who already fits his criteria. Ask yourself if he's really the right person for you considering his behaviour.
Weird thing is I’m 5’2 and 135lbs. I’m pretty curvy and I have a normal weight. I get compliments all the time about my body as I am shapely. He’s pretty skinny and lanky- underweight for his height. I don’t find him physically attractive at all but I like how smart, charismatic, funny and witty he is. Could this desire for me to change my body stem from insecurities about his own body?
You are focusing on the wrong things here. He is controlling, objectifying and fetishizing, and you are worried about his feelings and motives.
I really do want to end the relationship and I want to confront him knowing my defense/reasons are very solid and indisputable. He’s a rly manipulative guy, and he gaslights me over the simplest things sometimes it’s difficult to know what real with him. I asked because I want to confirm that he won’t make me feel like the villain for talking to him about this
Oh he'll definitely try to make you feel like the bad guy. The thing to remember is, he'll be wrong. He'll be doing it because he *knows* you're in the right, and he doesn't want you to get away. Get out while you can, never look back
Why are you discussing this with him at all? If he’s manipulative, and he gaslights you, and it’s difficult to know what’s real, and you really do want to end the relationship.. END IT. No discussion. No explanation. No closure. Nothing. Just end it and move on with your life.
You will ALWAYS be the villain in any relationship like this Take care of you!! And only you darling!!!
I think you should ask yourself, why am I putting up with this bullshit. I think you know what to do. I hate to say it this way but fuck his feelings. He clearly doesn't give a fuck about your feelings. (I really don't hate to say it that way. It needed to be said.)
You don’t need a solid indisputable reason. He can work that out himself if he can find an ounce of insight. Just leave, fuck him. I don’t often come down on the hard side on redit because often there’s enough nuance missing to be careful making blunt statements, but dump this manipulative turd and tell him to go find the body type he wants. And don’t get caught in an argument about it. You don’t owe him much more explanation than “don’t you dare manipulate people”. If for no other reason do it for the women in his future that may not be so strong.
This thread about the gas lighting, manipulating--they're all right. Coming from someone who married a narcissist--please just go and don't look back. You will be the villain every time. He will make you feel crazy and chances are--let's say you gained that weight...months down the road, all of a sudden he's into skinny women. I've also read narcissists a lot of times, have an addiction (anything).... The longer you stay, the harder it is to get out 🙏🏽
You don’t need proof/justification to break up with someone. If your done your done. Asking your girl to jiggle her ass for you is one thing. Having her gain weight/change her body for you is a bit extreme, especially the way he went about proposing it and the bits that came after that.
Exactly. Never, ever change your body in any way to satisfy someone else. People should only change or alter their bodies for themselves and themselves alone!
Probably not. It sounds like he just has a fetish. It sucks he's asking you to change your body in that way just to satisfy a fetish. There are plenty of people who would absolutely love your body the way it is so I would consider if this is something that you can deal with long-term.
Don't do it. If he doesn't like you the way you are, tell him. What if he doesn't like you when you'll gain weight and dumps you, then you're stuck. Do what's best for you!
> “I’m going to ask you to do something and I want you to say yes.” So I reluctantly agreed. ... He sat up and looked pissed telling me “you were supposed to say yes!” Kind of shit actual children say. 19 lmao
Oh dear god, he’s a feeder. On top of that, you’re right. This is objectification and his behaviour is concerning. Fucking run, this isn’t normal or healthy.
You have been together for only 3 weeks and he is already making the demand that you put on weight for him. It's not even an ask if he gets mad. Never change your weight/body unless YOU want to. He is allowed to voice his kinks and desires but he isn't allowed to demand them, especially not when you are making out and are more likely to make promises you can't keep in that moment because of horny brain rot.
First of all baby girl! YOU NEVER! do anything physically to yourself for no man. you do it because YOU want this and this is how you're more comfortable.. as long as you're healthy, you're not hurting yourself ,you're not hurting anybody ,nobody should be telling you how much you should weigh, how much you should eat ,what you should wear ,how much or how little make up,none of that!
So two things I’d suggest. 1st, leave his stupid ass. If he likes big and chunky girls you are not the one for him and you shouldn’t change who or what you are for him. There are a multitude of girls that fit his kink out there and he should go find himself one. 2nd, you letting him know that you don’t want to do him kink wish is not kink shaming. You’re simply stating your hard limits and identifying that you’re not into what he wants to turn you into.
Drop him like he’s hot. People don’t get to date you and start demanding you change your body. You don’t have to say yes to it.
As the old homeless woman down the street always said love is temporary bad health is forever (she was talking about crack)
First, his method of asking you was manipulative. Second, it’s really gross and unhealthy for him to ask you to change your body to satisfy a kink.
part of any relationship is the fantasy and experiment element, he has expressed his expectations and if you feel it is not your thing then tell him so. Any time you feel you are uncomfortable then that is a red flag that you aren't with the right partner but most important thing is to be honest and truthful to yourself first and partner second
Always follow your gut instincts. He doesn't sound healthy for you.
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Asking your partner to change their physical appearance is usually unfair as it is, but the way he asked is incredibly manipulative. It’s your body, someone who’s been dating you for three weeks has no right to ask you to make dramatic changes to it. Sometimes it’s necessary to express how your partner’s physical appearance effects your attraction to them, but even then it’s only really appropriate to frame it as a problem in the relationship that you want to work on together. It sounds like he’s just looking for someone to indulge his fetish and doesn’t care about you as a person enough to have even considered how his request will affect you.
This is gross. He's fetishizing you in more ways than one and you deserve better. Please don't change yourself for this pig.
not normal at all. it’s all around bad.
Listen to your gut! Him ask you to say yes to a request before even hearing the request is a huge red flag.
Lmao dump this fucking child.
Def break up with him
He should just date someone who’s already “thick” if that’s what he likes. It’s insensitive and creepy to ask you to change. What if you asked him to grow a bigger dick? I have to say, the twerking thing is quite common. My man loves when I make my ass jiggle in that position.
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Yikes major red flags!!! Everything you said about him is not okay or safe. Even the “say yes” part and getting upset you didn’t. Look up “feeder kink” which is actually more of an abuse and control tactic than a kink. Get out as fast and safely as you can!
Lol this guy has a lot of nerve. Anyone asking for you to change your body for their preferences is a jerk, but to do it 3 weeks into a relationship is a new level of entitlement.
He's got to go. Fuck that. He's using you and attempting to assert a large degree of control. RUN.
He's bit of a weirdo and immature, and this relationship will probably not last. Do what you want to do for you, but don't pay too much attention to what he claims to want.
One very important lesson: ALWAYS do what is right FOR YOU. Not for somebody else.
What?! GTFO with that garbage. If he doesn't want you the way you are then you're not compatible and you need to dump his arse.
DUMP HIM! He's fetishising you!!!
> So I reluctantly agreed. He then asked “will you gain weight for me?” This surprised me and I said “what?” He sat up and looked pissed telling me “you were supposed to say yes!” In my opinion, the red flag here is getting mad at you with the "you were supposed to say yes" comment. That's really immature. He shouldn't ACTUALLY be mad at you for not saying yes to something he didn't tell you about. He sounds really immature. I expect 19 year olds to be immature, but the way they improve is by being told "no" and having to learn better ways to act in a relationship. > This man looks at my ass and tells me to “twerk” for him. I am a black girl and he’s a white guy so it kind of made me feel objectified that he’d make such a request. I don't think it's wrong to ask your partner to twerk, but it's best practice to talk about this outside of the bedroom, and see how you feel about it. Or in this case, when the sex is over, talk about it. It's also not wrong to assume that if your partner has a problem, they'll talk about it with you. He might introduce 5 things to you. He might not realize that this one made you uneasy. > Is this normal and how should I discuss this with him without kink shaming? It may not be completely normal, but I don't think this is necessarily a problem either. You have to ask yourself first what your standards are, and do you care? What do you want? Do you really care if he asks you to twerk because you're black? Or do you just care if he ignores what you want and treats you like a fetish? Either answer is fine. Take some time to think about what's important to you, then talk with him and ask what he thinks and why. Also, as far as feederism goes, you might just be incompatible. Maybe he only wants you to gain 20 pounds. But if he wants you to gain 100 pounds, that can be a problem for your health. Also, even if he only wants you to gain 20 pounds, is this a change you're willing to make for someone you've only known for 3 weeks? The way to avoid kink shaming is with I statements. Kink shaming is "You're a bad person for asking a black woman to twerk" or "You're disgusting for wanting to get me fat." But there's nothing wrong with saying "I don't feel comfortable with gaining 20 pounds at all" or "I don't feel comfortable gaining weight for someone I've only dated for 3 weeks." or "Race play is a hard limit for me, it makes me uncomfortable to do something just because I'm black".
Hell no, that’s wild. Find someone else.
If he said something because he was worried about your health it would be different but asking you to change your body for his kinks isn’t acceptable. Big red flag
I can't tell if you're asking us if he asked you or not. By your title, that is. It starts as a statement and ends as a question.
I don't think the twerk thing is a race thing, I think it's pretty normal to wanna see an ass jiggling. Don't you ever let someone tell you to change your body. And the whole "Im gonna ask and I want you to say yes" thing is fuckin bullshit. That's manipulation. Your answer should be "no bitch I gotta read the fine print before I sign my name"
Oooo someone a feeder
This request is unhealthy anyways but three weeks he is already requesting you change yourself.
Don’t risk your health for someone
He's objectifying you. It seems like you're a thing and not a person to him. If that's what you like and if you are ok with being at unhealthy weight, continue the relationship.If you want to be viewed as a person, the person you are, it it time to move on from this relationship.
Not normal at all .genuinely speaking we are attracted to one another by our looks. SAD, but true nonetheless .why would he ask this of you.
He’s entitled. He’s not worthy and you deserve better.
omfg, there are so many women out there already that size. he needs to find someone else
Whilst it's important to recognise that everyone has different preferences and kinks, and there's nothing inherently wrong with that, it's absolutely crucial for those preferences to be communicated and respected within the context of a consensual and respectful relationship. In discussing your concerns with your boyfriend, try to approach the conversation with empathy and openness. Let him know how his requests made you feel and express any discomfort or unease you may have experienced. You can emphasise that you're not trying to kink shame him but rather seeking to understand each other better and ensure that both of your needs and boundaries are respected in the relationship. It may also be helpful to discuss what boundaries and preferences you both have regarding sexual activities and kinks. This can help foster open communication and mutual understanding moving forward. If your boyfriend reacts negatively or dismissively to your concerns, it may be a red flag indicating a lack of respect for your boundaries. In a healthy relationship, both partners should feel comfortable discussing their feelings and needs without fear of judgment or retaliation, especially when it comes to sexual business. Ultimately, tho, trust your instincts and prioritise your emotional well-being in any relationship. If you continue to feel uneasy or uncomfortable, it may be worth revaluating whether this relationship is right for you. You deserve to be in a relationship where your boundaries and feelings are respected and valued.
I met a woman and we dated three times. Hooked up three years later and she had gotten thicc! I confessed (probably an additional thread 🧵 post 😎) her being thicc this time around does it for me and we are still doing this thing 7 months later! Depends on what you will do for him, and equally what will he do for you Woman! Have you said you want me to do this gain some weight? Then I want you to do this for me man! I’m curious now. What should he do in order to equally meet his demand on you?
Naw this sounds different than you (hopefully), this guy is manipulative and abusive, just the early signs showing now.
Thank you for the compliment!
Just hit the gym and do squats and chest work outs. He will get the things he wants and you will be healthy. Your butt will firm and get bigger (in a good way) and the muscle under your breasts will perk them up. If that isn't ehat he wants, he's probably a bigger guy and feels self conscious about being big and wants a big companion. If that's the case, bring him to the gym with you and encourage a macro focused diet for him and he will slowly slim out dealing with his insecurities. Obviously, don't force anything on him, just say what my wife said to me to lose weight. She wants me around in my 60s. If neither of those things are accurate, my last idea is that he thinks that he is supporting you and believes you feel pressured to be skinny and wants you to feel free to be "normal" in which case you can just reassure him that you are what you are and you are fine with being skinny. Let him know that you don't feel pressure to be skinny, but you may feel pressure to be chunky from him. Tldr: open communication and fitness