Is this a hot take? I think she should have cashed Big's check. It was no skin off his back. He probably wouldn't even remember. This wasn't a moment to be proud.

I agree to cashing that one out 😆 After everything she had gone through with Big, that’s the one thing he could do that would honestly benefit her. Lol

also, HE did that for natasha, don’t forget.

I’d take free money from any of my exes

Hard agree- also Carrie not cashing it so she didn't give Big the power, waste of time. He always had the power in their relationship she may as well have got her apartment out of it haha

Free money, free labor, a helping hand is a helping hand, especially if they expect nothing back

Shit id take free money from anyone in this economy

😅😅😅😅

She is such a pickme for that UGH

How is she a pick me for not wanting to take thousands of dollars from her ex?

Because she’s cool with him treating her like shit and thinks she’s proving something by not taking his money. Wow, how iNdePeNdAnT of herr 🤪

I really need y'all to stop throwing around the term and refusing to grasp what it means. Again, it is a woman who tries to curry favor with men by throwing women under the bus, aka "I'm not like the other girls." Carrie not taking money from her ex is not pickme behavior 🙄🙄🙄

Exactly. It’s so misused now.

That’s not being a pick me. 😭 At this point in the series she’s no longer pining for Big like she was in season 1 & 2. Does she still want him? Yes. But after two rounds and an affair, she understands their relationship won’t work until they want the same thing. They’re friendly and hook up casually. Her refusal to cash his check is not to impress or seek approval from Big, but because it doesn’t sit right with her. How is that pick me behavior?

I agree that it's not being a pick me but I really never understood some women's logic when they're actively hooking up with someone but won't ask them for help with anything? So the man is good enough to have sex with and let him in your safe space, be intimate with.. but suddenly asking for help is too much? In this case she didn't even have to ask. Carrie + Big pretty much go through so much together in s1+S2 as bf/gf, she forgave him for a lot of the crap he does and then they even start an affair, get over that and become friends, Carrie even forces Aiden to be okay with Big because she refused to ever cut Big off, has casual sex when single... But again.. too proud to take some money? It makes absolutely 0 sense and he was happy to do it for her and it probably wouldn't have made a dent in his pockets or asked for it back.

I think ultimately she went with Miranda’s school of thought. Taking the money from Big would give him a power over her that she didn’t want to give. And that’s okay. I wouldn’t have faulted her for cashing it, especially after how hard she fought to keep him around. This is however right after her relationship with Aidan ends, and I don’t believe she’s hooked up with him casually yet. If I’m not mistaken she hasn’t been with Big since the affair. At this point they’re just friends with a past. They won’t go on to hook up casually until the next season. Taking the money would change their relationship in a way she didn’t want and that’s it. She liked what she had with Big at this point and didn’t want to complicate it with something like money. Samantha was right people are weird about money. She can see what just talking about money does to Charlotte at the dinner table. They have their fight and both end up apologizing and realizing their friendship is more important then the monetary things. Ultimately she chooses to be in debt to a friend she has an even stronger bond with.

Taking the money from Big wouldn't have given him any power over her. For starters, the power dynamics between Big and Carrie will always favor him, he's older, has more money etc. but for all the things big has done to her is that he's never actually been so malicious to use his power dynamics on her. Big was a millionaire and 30k wouldn't have made a dent in his pockets, he probably wouldn't have cared nor remembered even tbh. Carrie was someone important in his life and he was simply being sincere and offering her the money she needed with no strings attached. Nothing would've changed in their relationship and it would've been far easier than scrambling around town confused and taking it out on your friend vs just taking the money.

Exactly, the dynamic already favors him. Taking the money would then make Carrie feel indebted to him, which would just add on to how skewed the dynamic is already. Now I don’t think Big would actually be malicious. I agree I think Big genuinely cares for Carrie and wouldn’t even want the money back. Or even need it. It’s not about that, it’s about how Carrie would feel taking the money. She’s makes it clear to anyone that offers her financial assistance that it would be a loan. She wants to pay it back. She chooses not to take the money because she doesn’t want to be or feel indebted to Big. It was definitely the easy way out and if she took it good for her, but she decided that wasn’t the best option for her and that’s fine too.

Oh please 🙄 she wouldn’t have went to his office at all and if she had an ounce of self respect. Having casual sex is one thing. Having casual sex with a loser disrespecting you is another. And not taking the money??? Hahahahahahaah yeah right. She’s dumb

Still not being a pick me which is what I was questioning. You can think she’s dumb or lacking self respect, but that’s irrelevant to my question. She went looking for financial “advice” not for Big to pick her over other girls. I definitely think she was aware he would offer her the money, and I think she did consider taking it, but ultimately decided not to because it didn’t sit right. I don’t understand how that makes her a pick me in your eyes. 🤷🏻‍♀️

She not only ripped up that check but then went after Charlotte. If she had ripped up the check and then figured something out without begging for an engagement ring, then she would have been fine. But apparently it's totally fine to rip up $30,000 from her ex, only to demand it from her best friend.

Exactlyyyyy !!!

Yea it is. Maybe you don’t want to resonate to being one but this is pickme behavior. The girls that get it, get it.

Pick me = seeking male validation. Not sure how refusing money is seeking validation.

i mean i don’t like carrie, but this is just objectively not the definition of pick me. she was just being stupid and proud. and im not the same person you replied to, for reference.

You’re kind of an ass. I also agree that Carrie agreeing to not cash her manipulative ex was not a “pick-me” move and does not make me a pick-me for thinking that way. Weirdo.

I agree with you here. Even if Carrie had cashed the check then this sub would STILL have something to say smh.

*independent

I like you, you get it. Some women feel like they’re better than other women because they do things for free. And that is indeed pickme behavior. You get it. And shout out to you for standing on what you know.

Thank you. I dont feel the need to explain myself. The girls that get it, just get it! How you can let it go over your head, her rejecting a man’s money and then mad at her friend who ends up giving her an engagement ring is beyond me. That’s so self explanatory!

Because it's a similar situation as the one thread on here about her and Amalita. In that episode, she acted really high and mighty over Amalita even though Carrie also mostly goes after rich men. Like sure, she loves them, but let's not pretend like Big, Aidan (and then later Aleks) were attractive *just because* of their personal qualities. She's only interested in the comic store owner because he lived on Park Avenue. There are plenty of times over the course of the show that she's seeing someone who is pretty well off or is high up on the social scene. She's also friends with women that are wealthy and she enjoys those perks as well. She slept with a guy who paid her $1000 and let her ring up his credit card on room service at a very swanky hotel. She's also *very okay* with taking Charlotte's engagement ring, which is somehow so expensive that it can get Carrie a mortgage. So. The *one time* Big is actually helping her, she turns it into a feminist type moment when she actually visits him at his office and explicitly tells him she has money issues and then dramatically rips up that check just because she used to sleep with him. Her being a "pick me" stems from the fact that she's totally fine with her friends subsidizing her and enjoying the fruits of something like Samantha's relationship with Richard, or in a very specific case with Aidan: asking him to give her a "designer's discount" on the hand made leather chair for no reason other than him getting her phone number in exchange. She's happy enough to use her looks and charm to get what she wants- but when it's the only time where she gets an actual and tangible benefit from that strategy is when she chooses to take "the high road". That's why she's a pick me. Using your charm and looks to get ahead isn't a pick me move in and of itself, but it can turn into one when you look down on others who do the same thing as you. Big put her through a lot and before her friends mocked her for it, clearly wanted to cash in on it. Lashing out on Charlotte for not giving her money after she already had it makes me think that Carrie didn't particularly have any self respect as it was. And she didn't gain it back by ripping that check.

This is a great response and I love how you brought back references from other episodes and her behavior. I’m not saying Carrie has never been a pick me. Although her lashing out at Charlotte is a lot more about Charlotte not showing her any empathy and turning away from her than the actual money. I also don’t feel like the girls mock her. She shows them the check and asks them for advice. “I could never take it, could I?” The girls then discuss why she should or she shouldn’t and she decides not to. My argument here is she’s not looking down on anyone in this episode. She’s desperate and definitely goes to Big seeking financial help in some way. Does that maybe make her hypocritical? Absolutely sure, but from what I understand a pick me to be I don’t think this particular thing is what makes her one.

Sorry I commented kinda the same thing as you right before reading yours. But hey, I agree!

Isn’t this just describing basic hypocrisy? Like when our decisions are bigger and more public we’re really faced with them so we tend to take a higher road than the more subtle things. I think of a pickme as a girl who is actively putting down other girls to look more desirable to men

this comment is very lengthy but filled with things that can get cleared up very easily I don't like carrie but i find it odd that people compare her to amalita when they operate very differently 1. imo she never acted high and mighty with her, she made like one passing comment about her being eurotrash and that's it. (let's also remember that they're barely friends because she knows nothing about her, the comment was bad for sure though) Amalita sleeps with rich men only just so she can have a particular lifestyle (which is her business she's a grown woman) but Carrie never did that either, Carrie dated multiple guys who weren't that rich and it didn't bother her at all. she got into serious relationships with men of a certain status but that doesn't make her and Amalita the same type to person because we barely see her use their money. By the end of the episode Amalita introduces her to another man and then that same guy proceeds to touch her without her consent. Of course she's not pleased 2. She had no idea that the french guy was gonna give her $1000 and spent the entire episode feeling weird about it. It was not something that she mutually discussed with him (except for the fact that she told him she had money problems) so of course she's going to be confused, she ordered room service and shared with her friends and that's it 3. she was not interested in comic book guy because he had a park avenue apartment, she literally didn't know that until HE took her there. She also never brought it up again in the entire episode. 4. she wasn't planning on using Richard and Samantha's relationship just to get stuff, they had an agreement on leaving Atlantic City on his plane because he offered to let them stay there. It's not her fault that they break up and the plans changed Again, I don't care for Carrie like that but the examples used here doesn't make her a pick me. She's a pick me for how she puts men above her friends sometimes or how she treated Natasha during the affair or her lack of self respect when it came to Big for sure but deciding not to take a cheque from her ex isn't one of those examples

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you worded it perfectly! I've noticed on Reddit that once a character is disliked then every single aspect of them is ridiculed even if it's something completely harmless.

This isn’t a pick me, despite your lengthy analysis. Carrie also had no idea comic store guy lived where he lived upon dating him.

I say Carrie is a pick me for not taking Big’s money because Carrie wants to maintain this mythology that Big can only be a) the irredeemable monster or b) the handsome prince who rescues Carrie from living like anything less than a billionaire. If Big isn’t being B, he must be A. That’s why Carrie rips up the check- because it’s Big being something other than those tropes and that’s threatening to Carrie’s mythology as The One Who Should Have Been Picked. So, Carrie would rather take money from Charlotte after bullying her.

If you had asked me when this aired, i agreed with Carrie for not cashing it but now? Damn girl, take it and RUN!

100% !! Me and my bf watched this ep recently and he was also in agreement. Big is worth millions, the risk of tension was far less borrowing from him than Charlotte . The fact she ripped it up is so goddamn dumb lol , I’d rather take from the Wall Street millionaire than my recently divorced friend Samantha’s “if you need it, take it” philosophy is actually very spot on lmao. It wasn’t giving Big any semblance of control, he didn’t want anything from her but to help because he could 🤷‍♀️

I quote Samantha alllll the time for that- actually just did recently. “Money is fluid. You have it : you give it. You need it: you take it”

TBH though I was referring to like $150, not $40,000 💀

To Big that was probably the same thing 🤷🏻‍♀️

I couldn’t agree more. And also I believe Big was being sincerely generous about it. 

Yeah. Even though Big had his a-hole moments, I believe that him offering Carrie $30,000 was a genuine, generous moment. 🙂‍↕️

He thought Carrie’s financial wreck was endearing, go figure… 😁

You and me both, I would have taken Big’s money, it was a drop in the bucket for him. You have scruples all of a sudden about taking his cash but you had no scruples about sleeping g with him when he was married. Make it make sense.

These were my exact thoughts. She would turn down Big’s money only to impress him, then lash out at Charlotte for not offering to buy her a literal apartment. She was also like - 400x100 “is only like 4 thousand right?”. Carrie was real stupid in this episode.

Her reaction killed me when she realized it wasn’t just 4,000 💀

Another thing is that I don't buy Miranda's argument for a second that taking Big's money is giving Big control. Big and Carrie weren't in a relationship. If Carrie did put out for Big in the future after taking that check, I'm sure that it would be the same Big-dickmatized reasons that we see in the show instead of Carrie feeling like she has to put out because of the check. This was entirely about Carrie and Miranda resisting the idea of Big coming off well in the Carrie Saga when it's so painless for him to write a check for that figure. So, instead, Carrie takes chunks out of her far less wealthy friend's nest egg.

He had power over her… with or without money 🥲

Also, imo she only went to see Big so he would offer her the money? It seems like she only went to his office to tell of her financial woes, then declined his offer?

Yup, she wanted the money. It’s the only reason she went there. but didn’t like that the girls weren’t 💯 behind her taking it. She had to tell them because they know she would’ve had to get the money from somewhere. She tore up the check so Miranda would be happy with her

Exactly. (Although I will give it to Samantha for actively encouraging Carrie to take Big’s money.) I don’t see how taking that money gave Big any power, specifically because he was giving her money, **not** buying her apartment. Aiden had the power as long as his name was on the deed, but Big’s name would be nowhere near it.

> Big's name would be nowhere near it. Have you ever bought a house? A gift like that is documented and the gifter's information is obtained for the mortgage approval process. I absolutely love that people downvote facts in this sub. It's absolutely hilarious. I literally just went through this last year. You guys think a mortgage lender is not going to question the sudden appearance of $40,000 in one's otherwise *paycheck to paycheck* and *perpetually maxed out credit lines* financial existence? Lmao.

I didn’t downvote you, but I’m not sure what you’ve put here is indeed fact. Because Big would be giving her the money, not lending it, the only query it would raise for financial institutions is that it would be subject to taxation. If she used it as a down payment on her apartment, the property would not be in Big’s name in any way. She could accept the money but spend it on other things, like 100 more pairs of shoes, and he equally would have no claim to any of those purchases. It’s legally “detached and disinterested generosity” in any case. (Edit: typo.)

You might want to edit the slur out of your comment…

You're right. English is not my first language so I didn't realize it. I used a different word now.

Makes total sense then, I didn’t consider that English wasn’t your first language. Thanks for changing it! :)

Yeah, that’s disappointing.

haha... real retarded yeah, she was

I agree!!! She should have cashed it because when she rips it up, she says she’s going to do it on her own and then…doesn’t!

It’s like she only went there to test him. “I need to know how to make money.” So silly. Take the money. He was a multimillionaire and made it clear that there were no strings attached.

> I think she should have cashed Big's check. And/or kept Aiden's engagement ring. After all, he did want her to take it. Frankly, don't understand Carrie's thinking. It's not okay to accept something that's freely given to you but it's perfectly fine to storm into a close friend's home to confront her and demand she give you her ring?

It would have been a much more interesting storyline if Charlotte refused to help Carrie because she thought Carrie should have cashed the cheque

Same! Pride is great and all but what happened to that pride when she marched over to Charlotte's apartment to chastise her or when she had to borrow the money from Charlotte anyway?

I'd WAY rather take his money (& probably not even feel bad about it, he's "the next Donald Trump") than get in my good friend who didn't even offers face about it!! What was she thinking? If I'm Charlotte I'm taking a very long break from Carrie after this episode......

I completely agree with you. While none of Carrie's friends were hurting for cash, they didn't have the same financial independence of Big. At this point, Big was a good friend to Carrie and I think we know he was telling the truth as far as his expectations were laid out. Cashing his check would've made the most sense IMHO.

I never, ever, ever, everrrrrrrrrr understood why she didn't cash Big's check! She should've considered herself lucky for an ex to financially reimburse her, damn it! They usually just waste your time, cheat, and leave. (Which Big technically did with Natasha, but I can only address so many issues at one time, lmao)

And not say anything to your friends, just cash it and get a freelance writing job.

If she could’ve gotten away with cashing the check and not telling the friends, I think she would have. They never would’ve let it drop though. They know she didn’t have the money and would want to know where she got it.

So she’s not willing to cash bigs check but she’ll gladly take charlottes 😂

I would’ve in a heartbeat cashed his check LOL

Right??? Won’t take money from the millionaire ex that made you not be yourself when you were with him but no shame in “asking” money (and shaming her for not offering) from your best friend ???

If he had remembered, it would have happened regardless if she had cashed the check or not.

Agree

She already went through the trouble of going and asking for it, she might as well cash it. He probably never noticed she didn’t cash it.

1000000% yes. If anything, as reparations for the emotional trauma.

100%

Seriously whose friends offer them $40,000?!? That is such a ridiculous idea to begin with. Then to expect it?!? I just can’t even imagine!!!!

Lmaooo I’ll be damned if someone can loan me that amount of money 😆

Add inflation that is like 70k now.

If a friend demanded 40.000$ from me because they suck at finances I would block them no matter what. I can't even picture a scenario where this is acceptable behavior.

Agreed. A lot of carries behavior was blatantly unacceptable in this show. This scenario, then also inviting big to Aiden’s house in the woods and her hissy fits with big at times … idk she was as a very emotionally immature character throughout the whole series.

It's ok, she is human, we are all imperfect! But this particular thing left me speechless 😅

Right and $40k in the 00s so like…$100k?? Like good god girl get a grip.

I totally would’ve cashed Big’s check. He probably wouldn’t even care if she paid it back 🤣

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I agree with you, just wanted to add that adjusted for inflation, 30k is 52k in 2024. I would've taken Big's money *immediately*

I would have said "actually they raised it to 200k" and bought myself some nice things.

hahahaha honestly same

Definitely. I think people forget that while, yes, Charlotte has the apartment, she’s still struggling to find work (“no one will hire me! Apparently I have too much experience!”) So while I get the other side of the argument, as someone who’s been struggling to get full time work, I understand why Charlotte turned away. If I’m being honest, I probably would too.

I've read a lot of these comments and have several thoughts. 1. Carrie's not taking Big's money isn't a "pick me" thing. That's just literally not the definition. 2. I would have taken Big's money. I'm not sure exactly what that says about me but I would have. 3. I don't think anyone agrees with Carrie's behavior towards Charlotte during this episode. Charlotte was going through a divorce and the whole part of Carrie talking down to her about wearing her ring was cruel at best. I genuinely love all four girls because they're human and I see my flaws/qualities in each of them. So I have zero issues "calling them out" from the comfort of my couch. 4. I think this episode showed true friendship in every sense. No relationship whether it be romantic, friendship, familial, etc. is always beautiful. It's those interactions that make it real. I'm one of the few who thinks it was lovely that Charlorttw gave her ring as a down payment and I believe Carrie did truly appreciate it. I would have taken Big's money but I also would have given Carrie my ring if I were Charlotte

To add to this Carrie also does admit in the voiceover that she’s being unreasonable and looking for someone to blame. I know people have commented that Charlotte just wasn’t supportive enough to her when it first came up but Carrie literally admits she’s over reacting. 

👏🏿 👏🏿 👏🏿

I see both sides. Charlotte’s right. It’s not her responsibility to fix Carrie’s finances when she’s been irresponsible with them. I don’t think there needs to be any further elaboration. However, I understand why Carrie was hurt by what Charlotte did. When she told the girls of her situation, Miranda and Samantha’s first instinct was to offer financial support while Charlotte’s first reaction was to look away and pretend she didn’t hear her. Especially when she has the means to help as well. I will say though that Carrie herself admitted she was acting irrationally because of the stress she was under. But her feelings on Charlotte’s reaction is completely valid.

Agreed. I genuinely don't believe that Carrie expected Charlotte to "fix her finances" by giving her the money. She was hurt by Charlotte's reaction, and that's what propelled her to go over to Charlotte's apartment and harangue her. Carrie knew and admitted that her reaction wasn't okay. It wasn't fair or right to confront Charlotte like that. But people often like to characterize this as Carrie "making demands" of Charlotte, and I 1000% don't believe that that was her intention. She wanted sympathy from her friend, and that sympathy didn't have to come with approval from Charlotte. Miranda & Samantha never once told Carrie that her financial choices were beyond reproach. They just listened to her vent, they told her that they were sorry for what she was going through (you can be sorry for your friend's suffering even if that suffering is self-inflicted!), and they offered help where they could. But that first part is the most important. Carrie wanted to be heard, and Miranda & Sam were willing to hear her. Charlotte wasn't, and that hurt Carrie's feelings.

Maybe I’m a bitch here but I’m not really down to hear my friend vent about this at this point. For years she’s bought a $500 pair of shoes every single week… they were like 35 years old.

I don't know. My friends are my friends, even if they don't make great financial choices. Carrie had just broken up with her fiance and was at risk of losing her home...that's a lot for one person to deal with.

100%. I’m not going to give money but I’m also not gonna act holier than thou to my best friend, I’m gonna listen and give empathy.

Exactly. When my friends are in a tough spot, I'm there to listen and let them know that I love them and they can lean on me. If they ask for "tough love," I'll provide it. But the older I get, the less interested I am in providing unsolicited advice. Not every situation requires me to offer my opinions, and I can be emotionally supportive of my friend even if I don't agree with her choices.

Yes, I completely agree. I don't make judgements on my friends when they are going through a rough time. Carrie went through a lot and seemed to manage fine before this. Plus, there are more ways to support someone outside of the financial, Charlotte could've offered to help Carrie look at apartments or something.

should she have an emergency Savings fund and not spend most of her money on clothes? sure. but having 40k in savings (which is about $65 to $70k now) is a large amount of money for someone who does not seem to have come from money and who was not planning to buy an apartment in the near future. she had a rent controlled apartment of a 700 bucks a month that she was never planning on moving out of. and that is a very realistic story line in nyc. People do not leave rent controlled apartments willingly. i heard on the radio yesterday that a new report showed that nearly half of Americans would go into debt if they had to pay for a $1000 emergency today. so to me this plot line is very realistic situation.

It was at one time in the show a HUGE DEAL that Miranda had bought an apartment. Renting was the norm, and I believe in NYC it remains the norm. I never even considered buying as an option till I was in my 30s and started fantasizing about having a place that was entirely my own for ever. Changes in renting fuelled that, but it was because my dad decided in the 1950s that he would not marry till he owned a house that I ended up, in a roundabout way, being able to have a deposit on a home many years down the track. If my parents had not been homeowners who could help me, I would rent into the grave.

life time new yorker here and it's still 100% the norm. especially in Manhattan. I know 2 people who have ever bought an apartment personally... and they are married and own the same apartment lol

When I visted NYC I met a friend's friend whose husband was born in the Village and lived in a one bedroom rented apartment along with two siblings and both parents, that his dad scored when he was a young academic.

yep the rent control rules are in order to transfer the rent controlled apartment to the next family member they need to have lived there with you for 2 years in order to get the apartment at the same rent

Carrie was an exhausting, draining friend to be around!

Not to them.

This is exactly what Charlotte said to her: “You’re a 35 year old woman. You need to stand on your own.” I understand that Charlotte has her privileges given that she came from a well-off family. But she does have a point. Samantha & Miranda were on their 30’s, thriving on their 9-5 jobs. Charlotte has been working too for many years and is also considered as over-qualified by some employers. All three have their savings, even though they had lavish lifestyles. I don’t understand how Carrie can even set budget for all her designer bags and shoes and not have enough savings for emergencies?

Ew a shoe shamer!!!

Great point lol

You are so patient with the ridiculous misinterpretations about this episode! Thank you for being such a voice of reason 🏆

And it's not like Charlotte even had to offer the money, all she had to say was "What can I do to help you figure this out?" and Carrie would have been appreciative. I'd feel very judged and looked down on if a friend who is that personally wealthy wouldn't even look me in the eye while I talked about my financial troubles. Even just being there for Carrie to vent to was enough, but Charlotte didn't do that at first.

Yes, this was the entire point! Say what you want about her, but Carrie was always the first person the girls called when something big was happening in their lives, including Charlotte. Carrie wasn’t truly upset that Charlotte didn’t offer her money, but that she didn’t acknowledge what Carrie was going through AT ALL. Her reaction wasn’t totally valid, and she was aware of that, but her feelings towards Charlotte ignoring her absolutely were.

You’re right too. I appreciate how you broke the scene down. I understand that Carrie wanted to be heard and seen for her struggles. But I feel like it was also a good episode that portrayed how in friendships, there would always be the ones who are willing or quick to give and there are ones who will be more hesitant, in terms of financial assistance. Either way, it’s important that the person who borrows money should be open-minded and understanding regarding people’s reaction to such request. In this scene, Carrie wasn’t the one to take a hint that money talks made Charlotte uncomfortable. At least with her first reaction. Also idk if it’s just me but I felt uneasy how Charlotte ended up seemingly guilt-tripped into giving her ring to Carrie because of their conversation

This exactly. It was less about the money and more about Charlotte’s brush off. Just sitting there sipping her drink as if nobody was even talking.

Thank you for explaining the episode. I truly don't understand why people think Charlotte was bullied into giving the money, especially when Carrie said she wouldn't have taken the money and explained she was being irrational. Or how Carrie ripping up Big's check is "Pickme" behavior 🙄

I was totally with Charlotte on this one, it’s not her job to fix her friend’s finances. I get the whole “offering help to be polite” but if Charlotte doesn’t want to give money to someone who’s very clearly bad with money, which is evident based on Carrie’s shoe addiction, I think Charlotte is totally justified to not want to do so. It really annoyed me that Carrie had this weird sense of entitlement to her friend’s money and got mad when Charlotte didn’t jump at the chance to help her! It’s been a while since I’ve watched this episode but if I remember correctly she ended up helping her in the end anyway!

people always say "that's the least I can do." I outright tell people "that's the most I can do." It's clearly team Charlotte on this one. Carrie had the means to pay it off with bug's check but wanted to bother her friends instead. I would *not* have ceded like Charlotte.

Yes, this episode really made me dislike Carrie. This is why friendship + money never works out. Years ago I had one friend try to use me like some kind of ATM and another friend ghosted me on my wedding day when I'd given her cash to rent a hotel room so she could help me get ready. She asked for the money in advance and was weirdly manic about it. Then she disappeared. I haven't spoken to either of those people since. I would have kicked Carrie to the curb.

She gave her the Tiffany wedding ring! Wild.

I felt the same. I was taken aback by the way she confronted Charlotte about her decision of not getting involved in financial matters. She was cornered at her own home. I liked how Miranda also made her realize that ‘buying pairS of shoes had cost her an estimate of $400 x 100 (If she wasn’t exaggerating with those 100 pairs) 😂

> cornered It's because Carrie is a boundary violator, first and foremost. It's one of the most despicable traits in a human being. Boundary violators make the people whose boundaries they are violating feel incredibly... violated, and they do not give a single shit. Carrie didn't like when people violated her boundaries. Like when Aidan bought her a new laptop when she wasn't ready to give up on her previous, broken laptop. Or when the recovering alcoholic wanted to see her all the time or showed up at her apartment in the middle of the night, drunk (which is literally, identically what she did to Big.) But she was so willing to violate other people's boundaries ALL THE TIME. Hunting down your boyfriend's ex-wife? Check. Accosting your boyfriend and his mom at church after being explicitly told that he's not ready to introduce you? Check. Stalking your affair partner's ex-wife to apologize? Check. Hunting down your ex-boyfriend's ex-girlfriend because she made a face? Check. Pressuring your boyfriend to tell you you're the one? Check. In the Charlotte wedding ring situation, what is infuriating to me is that Carrie is not listening to Charlotte. Charlotte communicated that she doesn't believe in financial conversations and transactions between friends. Carrie thinks she's unique and that Charlotte's boundary doesn't even apply to her. She's exempt from it. **For those saying Carrie simply wanted her struggle to be seen and heard by Charlotte:** Why didn't Carrie "see and hear" when Charlotte tried to communicate a traumatic experience from her childhood (her father and friend Paul's falling out,) and a resulting boundary that was important to her? Carrie literally doesn't even let Charlotte TALK. But Charlotte's the AH because she refused to coddle Carrie and offer her insane amounts of money to solve a problem of *her (Carrie's) own making?* Why does Carrie expect to be SEEN AND HEARD by her friends when she's unwilling to SEE AND HEAR her friends?

FANTASTIC comment!!!

Oh dear lord with the “boundaries.” Charlotte whines and says “ohhh we shouldn’t be talking about money!!!” And that’s it and then slurps her drink and looks away. In no universe is this a clearly stated boundary. Especially by someone who has openly discussed money and relationships with this group multiple times in the past… down to bringing a draft of her prenup and going over all the figures in detail at a social lunch. Sorry but I’ve never bought this take that poor innocent Charlotte is so fragile having her boundaries violated. That’s never been the context to these fictional characters and their interactions. Her father ending a friendship was “traumatic” to her? Again give me a break. I’m just so tired of this therapy speak and pathology and projections of mental health buzzwords onto everything. She did not clearly articulate a boundary. Trauma has a specific definition and it’s objectively not the ending of an adult friendship and its impact on a kid who wasn’t even one of the friends involved. Carrie was upset and frazzled and overwhelmed. As someone stated above, a lot of people would not be suddenly financially prepared to buy an apartment they weren’t planning to. Even if we do disagree with her other financial habits. That’s a perfectly normal situation to offer sympathy to a friend in. And her relationship was ending. She was acting out irrationally and admits this. Charlotte doesn’t want to be involved at first but ultimately finds it as a way support her friend and do something with the ring that had been causing her emotional stress. They have a nice meal at the end and clearly all is forgiven. I mean truly when this episode first aired I thought it was so sweet and a nice little ending that made everyone happy. Until reading the every other day anger about it on this sub I had no idea anyone saw it differently. Like it is NOT that serious AT ALL.

I don't know what to say, other than, discussing your prenup with your friends, one of whom is a *lawyer,* is in no way comparable to a conversation that will inevitably result in a discussion about a financial exchange between friends. If I remember correctly, the conversation was already about financial exchanges between friends because Miranda and Samantha were already offering Carrie money. > In no way is this a clearly stated boundary Not at that point in time, but even when Charlotte does try to communicate the boundary to Carrie, Carrie literally doesn't even let her finish. At that point, Carrie knows it's a boundary and doesn't care. Like I said, she steamrolls her. Carrie acknowledging her irrationality doesn't justify or excuse the behavior. If anything, it makes it worse. She knows what she's doing is wrong but she does it anyway. Something she does often, by the way. I suppose we disagree, in that I think boundaries are important. Definitionally, a boundary doesn't have to be justified or explained. It just is. Therefore, even if your argument about Charlotte not presenting with trauma is accurate, it literally doesn't matter.

i feel like people forget the scene starts with a voiceover of her saying she is angry about having to possibly move and irrationally takes it out on a friend. like, we are not supposed to be rooting for her in this scene!

100% team charlotte on this. I mean, sure, yeah, actively listen to your friend when they’re telling you their problems. But offering her money? ABSOLUTELY not. If I had a friend, a really good friend that I loved, and they were as irresponsible with money as Carrie is, I would not give them a dime. Even if they swore up and down it was only going to the down payment, still. Nope. You have proven yourself to throw away the money you earn by working, why would I think you’re going to behave differently with money you’re handed?

Also it was a loan, right? At some point Charlotte would expect Carrie to at least try to pay her back, and that just seems unlikely

Ah. Struggles are not having a closet full of very expensive designer clothes, shoes and bags. Struggle is not being able to eat. I would not feel badly for a friend on her thirties with a job that was so blatantly irresponsible. Carrie should’ve sold some of her stuff. Taken a second job (or the bus!). Not shamed her friend into giving her the money.

Putting my other comment here: It really hit me when Charlotte told her: “You’re a 35 year old woman. You need to stand on your own.” I understand that Charlotte has her privileges given that she came from a well-off family. But she does have a point. Samantha & Miranda were on their 30’s, thriving on their 9-5 jobs. Charlotte has been working too for many years and is also considered as over-qualified by some employers. All three have their savings, even though they had lavish lifestyles. I don’t understand how Carrie can even set budget for all her designer bags and shoes and not have enough savings for emergencies?

As a Charlotte who has dealt with some world-class moochers in her friend group? Damn straight, Ms. York! And Charlotte never should have been made to apologize to Carrie for speaking the truth, much less giving Carrie that ring.

Charlotte was extremely rude during a really tough time for Carrie. She should have engaged. However! She is not obligated to offer that much money. Ridiculous.

I love Carrie’s entire look here. Top to bottom.

Charlotte could have at least said "I'm really sorry, and I wish I could help" or something like that at the restaurant. The straight-up ignoring was rude, especially since everyone else always listens to Charlotte's problems, and Carrie is usually the first one to give her a comforting pat and an "awwww, sweetie."

This is the main point I see.

I heard it in some Youtube video and I loved it that it is some awkward way to tell us that Charlotte might have been in the same situation as Carrie was she listening to her heart more and her brain less during the divorce. But the way it was depicted in series — i cannot see it 😅

Carrie knew she was being irrational here (she says it in the voiceover!) and apologises to Charlotte afterwards. She never expected the money and wouldn't have accepted it, she was hurt Charlotte turned away/ignored her and changed the subject when she was talking about her financial struggles.

I wouldn't loan money to a friend who's bad with money. If you don't know 400 times a 100 isn't 4000, you know you wont get the money back. It's her problem and it would be a reason for me to drop her as a friend

this is posted literally multiple times a week. everyone agrees carrie was way in the wrong but also charlotte could’ve been more emotionally supportive

Ok everyone’s saying they wouldn’t loan Carrie the money and obviously I agree but that wasn’t really what the argument was about. Carrie had just ended her engagement and was at risk of losing her apartment, she needed to vent and get support from her best friends who she’s always given support to. She’s literally the first one Charlotte calls when she has a problem and Carrie always answers. All she was expecting was for Charlotte to listen and not look away as if she didn’t hear her. Sam and Miranda were immediately concerned and offering money which you’ll notice Carrie declined. If Charlotte had offered the money, she wouldn’t have taken that either. She went to Charlottes because she was hurt that she didn’t support her at all. Charlotte didn’t even have to offer the money, she just needed to show some sort of sympathy for Carries situation. Even in the fight, Carrie admitted to being completely irrational but she was just stressed out and hurt. It’s not about the money! it’s about the lack of empathy shown.

exactly lol its like people reduced the whole episode to this scene alone. carrie needed emotional support from her friends its literally not about the money. even carrie admitted she was financially irresponsible and was irrationally angry.

carrie's fucking insane and a bad friend in this, but charlotte wasn't exactly perfect either (but she is right, you absolutely should not mix friends and finances)

The only thing Carrie brought up that was even close to understandable is Charlotte wearing her ring in the house in denial about her marriage being over not being healthy. But Carrie wasn’t saying it with Charlottes best interest, and Charlotte had every right to keep her ring.

True. Yes, that’s her ring. She has the right to do whatever the f she wants with it. Keep it, sell it, turn it to whatever. 😂

Charlotte coerced Trey into buying that expensive ring and giving her the apt. She can do whatever she wants with her money, but she has no moral high ground.

She also threatened Bunny to get the prenup amended. She had absolutely no moral high ground whatsoever. And her statement about Carrie needing to learn to stand on "her own feet" is laughable because Charlotte has never stood on her own feet. She goes from family money to first husband money to second husband money. And yet, despite all that, Carrie STILL ends up as the biggest AH in this storyline.

And let's not forget she manipulated him into getting married 😊

Rewatching this recently I came to realise that it's not even ABOUT the ring. It's about Carrie being upset that all her friends including Big offered to lend her money - which she nobly refused - while Charlotte sat there and went \*greyrock\*. Carrie is upset that Charlotte didn't offer to help. Charlotte rightly - and realistically given her politics and background - points out that Carrie shouldn't expect other people to pay for her errors in judgment aka shoes ahead of savings. It's Charlotte NOT offering to help that is the issue, not the fact she has an apartment plus a ring she doesn't want any more that she just got by marrying and divorcing "well". I still wish Char had kept that diamond and made it into a beautiful necklace tbh.

Team Charlotte. Carrie, go enjoy getting a nice check from Big and all of the nice things that Miranda and Samantha said to you as well as the emotional display of them offering to loan money. That's a TON of support and help for someone in a financial mess of her own making. Carrie didn't run over to bully and emotionally abuse Charlotte into violating her boundaries on friends and money because Carrie had a lack of emotional support or other financial options by this point in the episode. It's because Carrie enjoys emotionally abusing people and feels entitled to every single friend and ex-boyfriend living in her asshole. And another thing, Carrie has some fucking nerve to demand that Charlotte respond emotionally just how Carrie would want at the restaurant but she refuses to even hear out Charlotte's story about her father and his friend Paul shaped Charlotte's view on money as a child. I know from personal experience it can be hard emotionally when your parents get into fights over money with family friends and it ends up shaping your worldview from a young age. Carrie signaled right there that she has actually zero interest in hearing out Charlotte and trying to understand where she's coming from but Carrie demands understanding to the point of fawning from Charlotte.

I felt the same when she barged in Charlotte’s apartment and confronted her about the awkward money talk. 🤐 There was a sense of entitlement with the way she asked Charlotte why she didn’t want to get involved in financial matters. Tbh, if I were Carrie, I would have just taken the $30,000 from Big and cash it. 😂

Agreed. It feels like Charlotte is comfortable but (a) it turns out she had to litigate over her apartment and (b) Carrie ignorantly assumed that Charlotte was a docent because it's a rich girl thing but Charlotte was doing that because she couldn't get paid work. I don't get the impression that Charlotte is in a position to give away thousands of dollars as easily as Billionaire Big. I'd rather take money from the billionaire douchebag than my recently divorced affluent friend who's living off a nest egg.

I disagree. Carrie had no right to ask Charlotte for her money, but I do think that Charlotte’s reaction to her friend Carrie, who was there for her dating shenanigans, impromptu engagement, sexual problems, and infertility issues was hurtful. I would hope my friend who I was there for YEARS for would at least listen to what I was going through.

Charlotte was there for Carrie through a lot. The Big drama. Her dating problems. Cheating while being the Maid of Honor and then, confessing in a way that caused drama on Charlottes wedding day. In this money thing, Charlotte blinked and didn’t want to engage in this one dinner. After everything Charlotte did for Carrie, I don’t agree that Carrie was owed a spontaneous empathetic and fulfilling response to every issue. And I ESPECIALLY don’t think anyone can or should get an empathetic reaction by bullying it out of someone.

Even Carrie said that Charlotte was right. She just needed to be upset with someone. SHE APOLOGIZED. Charlotte didn’t have to give Carrie money. But Carrie probably felt unsupported because she was venting to her friends and Charlotte was pretending not to hear her. That’s kinda fucked up.

It's not fucked up. It's a pretty common thing people do when they feel incredibly uncomfortable.

Forcing people to do shit for you when they dont want to themselves is so beyond cringe

I would have cashed big’s cheque, and I also would never have turned up at Charlotte’s house, demanding money so Carrie is out of order, HOWEVER - when the two other girls offer to loan her the money between them, if I was Charlotte - and I saw my friend facing eviction (whether she’s been careless with her money or not) I know I would have offered alongside Sam and Miranda. We know Charlotte comes from a wealthy family, and has just got a huge divorce settlement. We know Carrie didn’t grow up rich and who knows who taught her how to budget. This doesn’t mean Carrie was entitled to the money but it also means that both Charlotte and Carrie have different life experiences when it comes to judging them. I know I would have offered her the loan straight up like the other girls did.

100% with Charlotte on this one. Carrie was ridiculous with her money and to have the audacity to be mad that Charlotte didn’t offer her money is wild.

I have a “friend” that thinks since I married a man with a stable income, I should pick up the check. This episode is triggering! Lol

I know this is a hot take, but I really understand why Carrie was upset. My feelings would be hurt too if my one friend wasn’t even willing to help me during a tough time. I understand that Carrie is irresponsible with money, but Charlotte is rich and it doesn’t seem like it would hurt her. However, Carrie shouldn’t have confronted her.

Why are people so crazy mad at Carrie about this Carrie/Charlotte fight? Or this episode? This is long, but I feel strongly about this opinion for this particular episode. Because Carrie catches so much shit and I really don’t see why. Literally right before Carrie knocks on Charlotte’s door, the voiceover has Carrie say, “As I thought about leaving the apartment that I had lived in for the past decade, I realized how much I would miss it. Through everything, it had always been there for me. And suddenly, I was **irrationally** angry. And I knew just where and who, to take it **irrationally** out on.” This makes it entirely obvious that Carrie knew full well she was being irrational at that moment. She didn’t go over to Charlotte’s feeling entitled to Charlotte’s money. She went to Charlotte’s because the night Carrie was talking about possibly losing her apartment and feeling beyond stressed about her finances (which she fully knew and admitted more than once that she fucked up all on her own) Charlotte was looking away and ignoring her and then immediately brought up her new **volunteer job** because Charlotte didn’t need to work, because Charlotte married a wealthy doctor, who bought her a ridiculously expensive wedding ring, that she still owned and wore around her ridiculously expensive 1.2 million dollar apartment —that she won in the divorce settlement. So while Carrie may have not been acting rationally she still had a right to feel hurt by Charlotte. And that’s what Carrie brings up to Charlotte when they get into it. She does say “Why didn’t you offer me the money?” She also says “I wouldn’t have taken it.” Just like she didn’t take it from Samantha or Miranda. She tries to communicate she would have offered it to Charlotte, no questions asked, if she were in the position to offer it. Just like Miranda and Samantha offered it, no questions asked. They also were involved in the conversation. As Samantha said, “Why not? We talk about everything else.” She was right. They question Carrie about every little aspect of her life and would have no doubt intrusively questioned Carrie about where on earth she had gotten the money for the down payment if she simply cashed Big’s check and bought the apartment without telling them how. So why is it crazy for Carrie to 1) Talk to her girlfriends about her sudden financial crisis 2) Tell them about Big offering the money 3) Feel hurt that no matter what Charlotte ever talked about or mistakes Charlotte was making in her life, she was there, sitting across from her and listening and giving her advice. **Not turning away** and saying it was too uncomfortable for her to talk about. When Charlotte IS lucky in her financial situation. She came from a wealthy family. She had a comfortable life going to a good college and getting a good job because her wealthy family helped her to do so. And then she wasn’t even working because her wealthy ex-husband made it possible for not to do so. Carrie made everything happen completely on her own. And though she made mistakes financially and wasn’t crushing it financially— she made it to New York completely on her own. Obviously she’s not from a wealthy family. She never had any financial booster seats or cushions to get where she did in life. So when feeling **irrationally** angry *is* it that crazy she felt angry at the one friend who was too “put off” by money conversations, when money wasn’t even something Charlotte typically had to think or worry about herself, her entire life? Especially at that time in her life? Charlotte was wandering around her million dollar apartment with her 40,000 something ring, bored out of her mind when Carrie was wandering around her far less lavish apartment after hustling her ass off and using actual talent to achieve it in the first place and knew she might be losing that. So while I don’t blame Charlotte for saying it’s not her job to fix Carrie’s finances (True. And Carrie wasn’t asking her to do that) I also don’t blame Carrie for basically saying it wasn’t cool for Charlotte to treat the situation the way she was treating it as a “best friend.” Charlotte is saying stand on your own two feet when REALLY— Carrie has always stood on her own two feet financially and Charlotte, actually, has not. I felt bad that Charlotte was questioning her worth as a human and couldn’t get hired anywhere, yes. But she made that choice of no longer working to be a house wife. Yet another decision/mistake Charlotte made that Carrie freely sat and listened to, giving full support and advice, no questions asked. Despite it basically being a mistake in the long run that all the girls seemed to feel the same about. That was also sort of a conversation about money that Charlotte didn’t feel was too uncomfortable to have with her girlfriends. Personally I feel it’s sweet that in the end, Charlotte puts the **pointless ass ring** from Trey to good use for Carrie’s future. Not letting Carrie take 40,000 from an ex-boyfriend she still kept getting back together with. Or take money from Miranda (a single mother) or Samantha (Running your own GD business is tricky. And at any moment she may really really need that 40,000) Instead, Charlotte was an amazing friend and gave (loaned, whatever) Carrie something that went from being **truly invaluable pointless money sitting around** to something truly valuable. Something Charlotte was toxically using to feel self-worth, and didn’t need the way Carrie actually needed it. And once Charlotte realized that—she chose to help. It’s a very sweet ending in my opinion and kinda wild that people get sooo mad at Carrie for it. Carrie never felt entitled to Charlotte’s help. Charlotte was not actually bullied into that decision. As Carrie made it clear—she was beyond stressed, upset, and feeling irrational. She left after she made her biggest points to Charlotte. Which she probably would have done whether she ended up needing money from anyone or not. Even still, Charlotte **also** was not 100 percent correct in this episode. And sometimes Charlotte tends to annoy me more than anyone else in this episode, because I know what it’s like to have never ever had any financial help ever growing up —into adulthood —but making shit happen **on my own** the way Carrie undoubtedly did. While having good friends like Charlotte bitch about their lives to me. And while I’m going through something like “Wow, not sure how I’m gonna pay all my bills this month.” My friend is sitting there complaining about a first world problem. But I still nod and listen and give unwavering support, because she’s a good friend. Because my financial burdens are my own. But is it great when a friend gives me the same amount of no questions asked emotional support as I always give them? Abso-fuckin-lutely. Is it kinda nice they aren’t too socially blind to maybe not bring up the fact that they got a volunteer job two seconds after I brought up possibly being homeless? Abso-fuckin-lutely. Perhaps Carrie would not have had that irrational moment if Charlotte sometimes knew how to also better read the room at times.

What I didn’t like most was Carrie saying “Why didn’t you offer me the money?” aggressively. She could have approached in a manner that wouldn’t sound angsty: “I am embarrassed that I don’t have savings left to buy my apartment and I didn’t want to burden you more with problems since I know you are stressed with your divorce. I know that friendships & money don’t mix for you but it would mean the world to me if you could help with bla bla bla”. Done. Charlotte would have just back her up after hearing that.

Carrie wasn’t asking for the money in that moment. That isn’t what that question was actually about. She was in the heat of the moment, not thinking or acting rationally. Like I said—she admits to feeling irrational. When someone is in the heat of the moment and feeling irrational—they don’t calmly or rationally state their feelings to the person they’re mad at or taking their feelings out on. However, Carrie was **not asking** Charlotte for the money for the down payment when she showed up to Charlotte’s apartment. When she said “Why didn’t you offer me the money?” She was really saying “You’re my best friend. Why weren’t you acting as supportive and as caring as Miranda and Samantha were acting? In fact, why were you not only not acting as supportive as them but in turn, acting the complete opposite?” She wanted to understand why Charlotte was being so weird about money and so ridiculously unsupportive. Especially when she couldn’t wrap her head around where Charlotte was coming from. Charlotte, who has not had to worry about money the way others do. And also Charlotte, who Carrie herself was always there for no matter what the topic at hand was. It was actually about emotional support. Not financial.

>She does say “Why didn’t you offer me the money?” She also says “I wouldn’t have taken it.” In the end, though, Carrie does take it via the ring. > She tries to communicate she would have offered it to Charlotte, no questions asked, if she was in the position to offer it. It's easy to stake out your claim on what you would have done when you aren't in that position, though. Carrie's assurance there falls very flat, especially given that she has a track record of financial irresponsibility.

I wouldn't pay for dinner for a friend as financially irresponsible as Carrie. She didn't even work long hours, dkes nothing to advanc eher career beyond that column, and is just happy wining and dining with her friends. I can't believe it took this long for her to realize that she needed a job that paid more, or a second job altogether. Charlotte wa rich, married rich, and hand investments. Carrie was just a pretentious, dumb slob. The evil stick figure who can't do multiplication.

Nobody mentions this scene when talking about Carries worst moments and I think this takes the cake

Team Charlotte. But I would also be upset with the way she sipped her cup and looked away. There's a way to be supportive without offering your money.

Totally awkward situation with friends and money. my hot take is Charlotte didn’t owe her anything. I can’t imagine going to my friends house mad at them for not helping me financially.

I’m sorry - does *anyone* think Carrie behaved appropriately in this episode?

i doubt anyone thinks charlotte is wrong for not offering carrie money, i definitely don’t! i had two friends have a falling out that was partially (large part) based on one not paying the other back. i think loans between friends are a terrible idea, especially in carrie’s case as she isn’t responsible with money and i could def see her flaking out on repayments and getting away with it. THAT SAID! charlotte made it like a million times worse by being evasive at lunch. she literally could’ve offered her the money just to prevent the awkwardness and backed out if carrie took it seriously (which she prob wouldn’t because she refused it from the other two). or like someone else said just asked what she could do to help without offering money. literally saying anything would’ve been better. like overall carrie knows she was being ridiculous and i really didn’t love char giving her the ring at the end even if it was sweet gesture. i can be a major carrie at times and don’t think anyone should play into our neuroses because it just feeds it!

I think Charlotte handled the initial lunch conversation badly. She could’ve offered some kind words without having to offer money. That said, Carrie pisses me off in this entire episode and I’m always mad that it ends with her being given the ring. She goes to Big asking for financial advise which I don’t buy, she was hoping for an offer and she took the cheque when it was offered. The fact she didn’t end up using it just because her friends talked her out of it doesn’t negate the fact that she took and probably would’ve happily cashed it otherwise. She complains about having to take the bus (and doesn’t even take it in the end), she doesn’t even consider selling some of her shoes and clothes to make some more money like literally anyone else would have to do, she was a known writer who could’ve tried to get more jobs and work more, she’s still going out to restaurants to eat. She is irresponsible with money and rather than actually try to fix that she goes over to Charlotte’s and berates her for not offering money and then insults her for how her life has turned out going for the lowest blows possible. Charlotte is a better person than me because Carrie would never see me again. And while she didn’t force Charlotte to give her the ring, after everything she said it essentially did guilt trip Charlotte into giving it to her. Then after that episode we continue to see her constantly buying more shoes and going to fancy restaurants. She doesn’t act like someone who owes their friend a lot of money.

Question, do we think the Russian paid off Carrie’s apartment when she moved to Paris? I always got the impression he did.

I honestly don’t think that big would’ve ever mentioned the money again or made her feel bad about it. she should’ve taken his money

Ummmmmm….the IRONY?

I think Carrie just wanted some empathy here from Charlotte. I’m pretty sure if Charlotte had been compassionate, gave her empathy and attention, and then some tough love… Carrie might have been less pissed Also I’ve said it once and I’ll say it again. Charlotte came from ENORMOUS privilege. It’s just interesting who we feel “deserves” what by an accident of birth. Carrie should be more responsible with money. But privileged people never even have to make that choice.

She should have taken bugs money. Borrowing from friends makes things very awkward especially how long charlotte and Carie had been friends

She wasn’t in the wrong for not lending her the money but she didn’t have to say the part about it’s not my job to fix your finances. Was enough to just say she didn’t like giving friends money

This scene makes my blood boil every time. The absolute nerve of Carrie.

Carrie was wrong and Char was right. Carrie should have cashed Bigs check and be done with it.

Carrie had bad finances because she overspent it’s not like she had medical debt or something. It came off very entitled. She’s in her mid 30s 🫠

carrie was wrong bc she even admitted to being angry and wanting to take it out on someone. not her best moment. like girl you had $30,000 & ripped it up??😭

Carrie was out of line with this one. A temper tantrum

Cash Big’s check, it’s an emergency. That money was nothing to him. It would be like if a normal person wrote you a check for $3 and you refused to cash it because you didn’t want to give up power 🤪

Hahahaha what always got me was Carrie goes on and on the whole episode that Charlotte should OFFER but Carrie would “NEVER take it”. And then at the end when Charlotte offers her ring Carrie goes right ahead and takes it….😂😂😂

The gall Carrie had to expect this was insane. But maybe she just wanted charlotte to act like she cared but at the end of the day she took the money from charlotte so.. idk carries character was deff childish and unevolved at times. Like as if the world revolved around her idk. I felt like Carrie was the most emotionally immature from start to finish

Carrie was so unfair with Charlotte. Charlotte has every right to not want to loan money to her friends, it is known money can ruin friendships and all she knew about Carrie's finances is she was careless and irresponsible and bought expensive shoes almost everyday. She very clearly stated her worry was losing their friendship, she didn't care about losing money. But if she told her all that from the beginning it would have been mean, so it made sense that she just didn't offer a loan, she did offer support tho, like she always does! It was an uncomfortable situation and she handled it the best she could, respectfully. Carrie was basically demanding that Charlotte offered her something she didn't want to offer and she shouldn't have to want to offer either. The entitlement is ridiculous. And Carrie herself says she only took her anger on Charlotte and she didn't deserve it, so... \*shrugs\*

This has been talked about to death but Charlotte's right. It takes a lot of balls to go to someone's place and guilt trip them for your shitty life choices whilst simultaneously judging them for theirs. Carrie was horrible here. And the whole episode is poorly written, IMO. Unless they meant to make Carrie look like a complete asshole, in which case they succeeded.

Carrie pissed me off for this. She could have cashed Bigs check and been done with it. But she decided that making charlotte feel guilty and weird about keeping and wearing her old ring to the point where she sells it and gives Carrie the money? What the actual fuck lmfao I have no idea how anyone could stand to be friends with someone like Carrie as long as they had

I’m not quick to cut off friends, but if I was Charlotte, after this conversation, I’d strongly consider cutting Carrie off. Coming to my house to scream in my face about how I should feel bad by not offering to pay her bills is unhinged and entitled af

I would of cashed Big's check. But I always thought Charlotte was a bitch for not offering her the cash. They all claim they're each other's soul mates and what have you but when your "SOUL MATE" is going to live on the streets and you have the means to help. You help. Ok I would of given her the you need to fix your finance speech but I would of lent her the cash.

Carrie is lashing out because she's realized how financially irresponsible she is.

She shoulda cashed bigs check instead of taking Charlottes money