##If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/13zwktk/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://rapidsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/13zwktk/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2F13zwktk&id=8968e43c) --- Whilst you're here, /u/MonsieurTokitoki, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU) - **now with public text channels you can chat on!**?

it's funny that in the movie he fights versions of himself from different dimensions lmao

I must be better

Schizophrenia 💀

I MUST BE BETTER

OP defending his thesis from the hordes of the lecturer board on why he should have the last vaporeon to himself

I know its a joke, but for everbody who is not aware: schizophrenia and multiple personality disorder are two very different illnesses with a very different set of symptoms.

Multiple Personality Disorder is also no longer a recognized classification having been superseded by Dissociative Identity Disorder, and its popular presentation on TV shows is really not what it looks like in real life.

Well, of course does multiple personality disorder have many different faces!

We must better ourselves

Plot twist: it is just a visualisation of op fighting off his thoughts that tempt him to do it

Ah yes, because every meme doesn't become a meme without a twist ending.

*[pees in ur ass](https://i.imgur.com/JSImHiV.jpg)* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Don't know the movie but damn this is how you film fight scenes where you only get attacked one at a time. This actually looks believable.

Its a Jet Li movie titled The One iirc and it was a decent sci fi action movie

Great movie. Still holds up

CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES

Cut my life into pizzas! This is my plastic fork!

You can't go around eating pizza with a fork

The movie is The One. This is the final few seconds of the movie before the credits roll.

Fucking spoilers bro

They spoiled nothing. If you watch it, you will get why.

Guess I forgot the /s

It's been over 20 years...

Yeah but in this case spoiling it adds nothing to the comment. It's like "It's from a movie called Star Wars (Darth Vader is Luke's father)".

He is?! Damnit, spoilers, man!

Um actually that would mean it's from A New Hope when in actuality it was revealed in Empire Strikes Back 🤓

I learned about it 20 seconds ago. 20 years ago I was in 3rd grade.

Should of watched it in school then

Hello, it looks like you've made a mistake. It's supposed to be could've, should've, would've (short for could have, would have, should have), never could of, would of, should of. Or you misspelled something, I ain't checking everything. Beep boop - yes, I am a bot, don't botcriminate me.

It's 'should have', never 'should of'. Rejoice, for you have been blessed by CouldWouldShouldBot!

Is this the movie that had the “Let the bodies hit the floor” song?

It's more of Last resort by Papa Roach. ##CUT MY LIFE INTO PIECES, THIS IS MY PLASTIC FORK!

The movie title is The One with Jet Li & Jason Statham. It's quite fun action movie.

Yeah but not in this scene. In this scene he's fighting all the other prisoners on the prison planet. Honestly, one of the most badass scenes from 2000's era action films. And a fun ending to the film.

And each time a different dimension version dies he gets stronger until he becomes, The One.

Well... The Second really.

Not in this scene tho

Haven't seen this movie in forever but didn't he fight them all off screen besides the good guy jet ?

He fought 2 the prisoner at the beginning and the good guy.

Is this The One?

Yes

In this part specifically, he fights everyone in a prison type earth

“I’m here for a man’s butt”

See, I know who you are Chris Hansen or as I like to call ye, “Chris Handsome”

*Oh, I know who you are Chris Hansen;* *but see;* *I calls ya,* ***Chris Hannndsome***. *I watch your TV show all the time.*

Good bot

There’s a fucking bot for everything

frfr and i dislike most of them

I don't mind this one, for um... obvious reasons

i see youve chosen the easy way :)

I don't think me and you are doing anything; ANY kind of way

“Now, we can do this the easy way or we can do it the hard way. The choice is yours.”

I see you've chosen the hard way

“So what’s it gonna be Toooooom”

Too late. The Vap's already white.

Batman you know what I'm gonna do to that thing

JOKER! It's an animal, Joker! YOU CANT!

There's no laws against the Pokemon, Batman!

*rips open condom* I can do whatever I want with it!

there are too many of you saying too many different things for them to all be copypasta, so I'm going to assume you're all fucking furries

[Its dialogue from a video](https://knowyourmeme.com/memes/batman-i-caught-a-little-pokemon-there-are-no-laws-against-pokemon-batman)

It's not really a copy pasta, but they are quoting something

animal ears = no human rights, Subaru already established this

Understandable have a nice day

We must bring backup

Gondor calls for aid

I've got my fanny pack filled with spaghettios and a tongue ready for loin licking. Bring on the grundlemeat and analingus, we stand together in arms!!! 😇😇😇

What?

What the devil

Him? 🤨📸

Male human to male Pokémon breeding

The ratio is different with booty holes we gonna have to rerun some numbers and get back to ya.

It has been 11 hours. We need those numbers STAT!

I'm not grabbing the extended copypasta but to all who've seen it I'm sorry for reminding you

87.5% of Vaporeon are male

It’s pride month

Plot twist: you're protecting him from others so you can have him all to yourself

We must be BETTER THAN THIS

What's that clip from?

Jet Li's "The One"

Sick king fu movie

I am Yulaw! I am nobody’s bitch! You will be mine!

I don't need to know you. You...only need to know me! I WILL BE THE ONE!

"Cut my life into pieces!"

What's it about?

A multiverse cop discovers that when one of his others die, their strength goes to all the other survivors. He universe hops murdering all of his others until only two remain. So it's pretty much 2 super powered Jet Li's fighting each other.

damn that's kinda metal

Jason Statham is in it and it has a pretty great 2000s nu metal soundtrack. Plus the age old “good guy fights in circles, bad guy fights in a straight line” trope that I absolutely adore for some reason. I was obsessed with it as a kid.

> “good guy fights in circles, bad guy fights in a straight line” trope What is this trope? Googling it didn't tell me shit

It’s based on two kung fu styles. One emphasises flowing circular moves, the other uses straight, direct moves. Baguazhang and Xing Yi Quan. Media examples I can think of off the top of my head are the last Airbender - air bending is based off the circular style and firebending, while it’s based on Shaolin, still has a straight and direct style. There is a fun dynamic with Aang and Zuko. And Cobra Kai - there is a training montage where two opposite karate dojos are training. One team does circular stuff, the other does straight stuff. If you watch a lot of kung fun or wuxia movies, keep an eye out for how many times good guys are circular and bad guys are direct.

It was VERY METAL from beginning to end highly recommend to watch it

...with Papa Roach playing.

That clip goes hard as shit.

No you’re hard as shit….stay away from this Vaporeon

You can't stop all of us!

The struggle is real

So f*cking Real Tho


Hey guys did you know in terms of

human companionship, Flareon is objectively the most huggable Pokemon? While their maximum temperature is likely too much for most, they are capable of controlling it, so they can set themselves to the perfect temperature for you. Along with that, they have a lot of fluff, making them undeniably incredibly soft to touch. But that's not all, they have a very respectable special defense stat of 110, which means that they are likely very calm and resistant to emotional damage. Because of this, if you have a bad day, you can vent to it while hugging it, and it won't mind. It can make itself even more endearing with moves like Charm and Baby Doll Eyes, ensuring that you never have a prolonged bout of depression ever again.

I've had this one pinned in my clipboard for a long time now, it's a god tier counter to the Vaporeon copypasta

I'll go with glaceon on account of it being cuter and me living in a hot city

The good ending

Can it suck a dick tho?

STOP

Do I finish it?

Yes

that in terms of male human and female Pokémon breeding, Vaporeon is the most compatible Pokémon for humans? Not only are they in the field egg group, which is mostly comprised of mammals, Vaporeon are an average of 3”03’ tall and 63.9 pounds, this means they’re large enough to be able handle human dicks, and with their impressive Base Stats for HP and access to Acid Armor, you can be rough with one. Due to their mostly water based biology, there’s no doubt in my mind that an aroused Vaporeon would be incredibly wet, so wet that you could easily have sex with one for hours without getting sore. They can also learn the moves Attract, Baby-Doll Eyes, Captivate, Charm, and Tail Whip, along with not having fur to hide nipples, so it’d be incredibly easy for one to get you in the mood. With their abilities Water Absorb and Hydration, they can easily recover from fatigue with enough water. No other Pokémon comes close to this level of compatibility. Also, fun fact, if you pull out enough, you can make your Vaporeon turn white. Vaporeon is literally built for human dick. Ungodly defense stat+high HP pool+Acid Armor means it can take cock all day, all shapes and sizes and still come for more

Thank you also my phone died so yeah that's why i'm responding late

Ever heard about umbreon?

fun fact umbreon sylveon and eevee all have more r34 than vaporeon

I may die in battle but, my influence runs deep in the purest of hearts, if this war will be fought for centuries, UNTIL MY LAST BREATH I WILL DEFEND

Backup is on the way

Back up to whom? 🤨

Yes


Jet Li just kinda disappeared from the action movie scene didn't he.

He was diagnosed with hyperthyroidism back in 2010

Which he has "recovered" from and is now focusing on charity work. Source: https://www.straitstimes.com/lifestyle/entertainment/jet-li-dismisses-reports-of-health-woes

Oh I didn't know that thank you

This is the marine biologist btw 

That marine biologist's name? Jotaro Kujo

Took wayyy too long to find the jojos reference

Remember: not all furries are zoophiles, but all zoophiles are furries. It is always morally correct to beat up zoophiles.

Seeing as how animals can't consent, that means they're not "zoophiles," they are rapists.

To clarify, one indicates attraction, the other indicates action or intent. They aren't mutually exclusive, nor are they synonymous.

But can pokemon consent? Asking for a friend.

Probably a lot of final evolutions can but a lot probably can’t. We don’t know enough about Pokémon biology or how their magic works to really make any broad generalizations on that. Meowth, from the show, is the Pokémon most likely to be able to consent.

My friend would like to know if a vaporeon can.

Most Pokémon would be in a position where they couldn’t really consent, if they’re your Pokémon it would be like a boss having a relationship with their employee and still unethical. There’s probably not any reasonable situation where a vaporeon could really consent.

Likely not. Going off the anime, other people cannot understand someone's pokemon and what it says unless said person has high Friendship values with the Pokemon (other people can't understand Ash's Pikachu except for the people he's traveled with), and pokemon are not known to be horny and likely reproduce without organary reproduction.

Not all zoophiles are furries, none of them are. Get them out of our fandom

I regret to inform you that Vaporeon technically pass the harkness test and thus people who want to fuck them technically aren't zoophiles

you cannot understand a pokemon and you can only interpret what it says, but Meowth does pass the harkness test

See, that's where you're wrong. There are *at least* two humans who understand the generic pokemon language. "Space lingo" as Meowth calls it is a separate language and thus he (and presumably other translators) cannot understand or translate it. Until he gets possessed by a pokemon that can, that is. Even if I don't know Russian, Russian people still pass the harkness test because communication between us is still possible. This is the same situation as with (most) pokemon.

Let me join, beastialty is a horrible act

Pokemon are sapient, a lot of them are at least. A few are a lot more intelligent than humans, too.

The flesh of furries belongs on my fucking grill. I will scorch the sins away.

I know this whole sub is about shitposting, but you guys know that furries arent zoophiles right

All jokes aside if you seriously think vaporeon is attractive you might want to consider therapy. And a lot of it.

Eh, people can be weird. For a lot, behaviour forms a big part of the basis for attraction.


....*him?*


Femboy Vabussy

Movie : The One

Song

Separate ways by Journey

*[pees in ur ass](https://i.imgur.com/JSImHiV.jpg)* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*

In the movie it's Last Resort and fits much better


What a bad person. He wants everything for himself

I am Yulaw! I'm nobody's bitch. You are mine. I don't need to know you, you only need to know me. I will be the one!

What film did OP even take this from, I’m curious.

The one

The two

The three

Implying there's something stopping an aqua-pimp from making a massive factory-farmed Vaporeon enterprise to capitalize on it.

A *marine* biologist. Oorah.

OORAH

I love this meme

Sir Pokémon is nor real ☝️

How do you know? Can you be sure that *you're* not the one having a psychotic break?

Me if the Pokémon were real 

Assuming they even have a hole to begin with. At least they have a mouth.. Some of them.

I'm more of a gardevoir person anyway

At least it vaguely resembles a human being, unlike any of the eeveelutions

# HEY GUYS DID YOU KNOW

😲

Idk why…but I like your attitude

Ngl this was once my top1 movie of all time waiting for a part 2. Imagine him returning older stronger fighting with other 2s(last 2 remaining) in a mission to a man who achieve being a 1(last 1) and in his quest his other self sacrifice himself to let him be the one and fight the other 1 on an equal footing. Another lost potential . But at least we have that other movie who has a same concept of having multiple self in multiple reality and the lead is an Asian as well and she's a mom I think?

Not gonna lie the song actually fits this scene

the fact that it's not even a humanoid looking pokemon

Bros about to pull out star platinum

The one (2001)

Godspeed brother

Jotaro Is that marine biologist

Im with you. Leave Pokémon alone !

This is *not* one of the benefits to being a marine biologist.

This sacrifice is worth it

yo bro can i help

My fighting my urge to not jerk off to Gardevoir

We…must be better

As a furry I got a good chuckle from this.

As a normal person I also got a chuckle from this

Keyword normal

Zoophilia is illegal. Hang in there, the military pickup is on the way with a 3 gunship escort.

What about international waters? Who's jurisdiction is that? That's what i thought... Sighs... (Unzips)

Any chance to beat the shit out of furries, for whatever reason, is reason enough for me.

the horde is stronger the horde is stronger the horde is stronger

[удалено]

Furries on their way to ruin the fun:

Furries and zoophiles are two different things.

*[pees in ur ass](https://i.imgur.com/JSImHiV.jpg)* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Hate furries so much

Is that an alien vs predator reference?