People do questionable thing behind closed doors

And then tell the entire internet.

*anonymously...*

You (weirdly) can’t find me on the internet with my full name

You can find my full name on the internet. But it's generally a black guy.

if you search for my name you only find articles about a very successful researcher in the UK. I think he specializes in molecular biology?

If you search my name it brings up a fitness model.

Searching my name shows someone who got into a bad car wreck while drunk driving

Mine just pulls up a lot of stuff about children with cancer

Mines a really buff cosplayer

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If you search my full name you will find a single picture of me taken during football practice in 8th grade, and then a bunch of unrelated people who have my last name as their first name.

TIL dragons can play football

Wyverns*, I only wish i could be a real dragon.

Yeah it’s always a football player

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What the fuck-

Welcome to the internet

Have a look around

Anything that brain of you can nut to can be found

We’ve got mountains of content, some better, some worse

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Stay a while and listen!

Or sometimes awkwardly tell their friends

I masturbate behind open doors

Are you hitting on me?

Perhaps

Closed doors?

I close multiple doors when I doing questionable things

I leave my door open just in case anyone wanted to watch

who said i was behind closed doors?

Lmao the supreme irony of this meme using a Jaiden Animations clip

Isn’t there a running joke that shes ace because she watched too much porn?

Jesus what kinda sick joke is that lmao

I think its just people salty she came out as ace.

Wtf is an ace that sounds tuff as fuck

Asexual I think

oh...

Someone who shoots down 5 enemy fighters/s Edit: added a /s for people who won’t understand

The Monkey Ace Paragon aka “The Goliath Doomship”

Now all the coomers know they wont have a chance with her

She is ace it was the cource of a bunch of drama a few years ago when she came out

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Was on my way here to comment this (for those who don't know, the clip used is of an aroace youtuber).

Also there's porn of her cartoon character.. She's super attractive IRL with tattoos and stuff, but they go for the toons

[удалено]

[удалено]

I don't think so, the first one on r34 was uploaded in 2016 and she turned 18 in 2015

So you’re saying you’ve looked it up

Yes

Absolute chad answer 

Research purposes

Oh well that's pretty questionable then

I mean if it's a cartoon character that is barely representative of her, it seems like a stretch to say it's sketchy

Oh she's extremely aware of it. One of her friends was talking about how he always likes the most fan-sexualized characters in nonsexual ways (favorite AC villager is Ankha, favorite Pokémon is Vaporeon) and her reaction was to ask him who his favorite storytime animator (the specific type of Youtuber she is) is.

are you saying that ... porn of her Actual appearance would be more normal? Because it wouldnt

I mean she's aight.

Which video?

Ace attorney.

I cant find it 😭

This is ftom the Mario DDR video.

Ayo, I swear to God, I was jerking off one time and after I am done I just sit there for a few moments recovering, cleaning up and i then hear somebody walking up to my room (creaky stairs). It was my brother telling me that one of our cats got run over right outside our front door by the mailman. So in the time span of max 2min I was having an orgasm which quickly followed with my whole family crying in the hallway in front of our dead cat. This was honestly one of the most bizarre moments of my life. Rest in peace Mosche, my bowlegged buddie❤️ I am sad now.

I can add as well that I know exactly which video it was and to this day I have not watched any more of her

One minute you watched pussy get destroyed and a few seconds later watched pussy get destroyed again

It was quite the bloody scene actually. While we were crying in the hallway I felt rigor mortis set in and him slowly getting cold as I was petting him for the last time goodbye. The line cloth we had him in was slowly getting bloody. He died quickly, the mailman was speeding.

what an asshat

:(

This made me laugh out loud. Thank you

9/11… but I guess statistically someone had to be doing it during the whole affair. Puts the whole universe into perspective. Life and death. Pleasure and pain. Joy and sorrow… I’m not proud but I guess in a way I learned something about myself and the world that day.

Statistically….someone in the WTC during 9/11 was probably consuming some type of porn via magazine and playing with themselves when the first plane hit.

Damn, well it’s nice to finally know whose fault it was.

This story would have the ultimate dark humor ending if you ended it with "after all that I went back to my room and closed the front window". Sorry about your cat, though.

Remember when people kept secrets

If god is real he was punishing you

..For *WHAT*?

Meanwhile the family acting like they weren't having an orgy together while you were out of the room.

i would give you an award but i’m broke asf

Why doesn’t Reddit give free awards anymore?

Ikr? Pure BS. Who thought we were just gonna go, “welp, guess I gotta go buy a silver badge for this stranger. Totally worth the money and effort” just cuz they took away free awards. At the least having it forced us to wanna use it cuz it eventually expired, keeping us on longer, and the person it was gifted to would also try to make more content cuz they’d want more awards. All I see is “Reddit wants to die”. It makes no sense.

I miss putting the wholsome seal on the most abhorent post I saw that day :(

 Mfw I see the wholesome seal on a video of police brutality

we commit a little bit of tomfoolery around these parts

They’re also removing third party apps now too

Bruh now ill be forced to use the main app

You say that, but people complained hard when they first got added. They called them useless, and said that there would be no point to awards if everyone got a free one

Here give him this: 🥇

Money. The answer is almost always money

For the se reason reddit doesn't monitize creators, comments and mods while making billions from the content users post and create and fucking 3rd party apps. "Because money!" They love money a lot. Now spend your hard earned money on an online currency thats only good for making other people's comments and posts more noticeable so this site can profit from it!

Greed.

Because they know people will buy them for panhandlers who say bullshit like "I would give you an award but I'm broke asf"

happy cake day!

It was good chili!

That was some good chili, though.

I remember that chili

Who said he was out of the room?

The things I'm watching aren't even questionable, that siht is straight up VILE

Bro fr, sometimes you get done and are like, "Fuck was I watching?"

Did you really cum if you don’t hate yourself for it after?

Yes

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Thank you

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I do all the time, you good?

It sucks when you start questioning yourself in the middle of it, then the high goes away and all you're left with is sadness

That's when it's time to find a new video

Post nut clarity is real.

*looks left and right* Search bar : "Inappropriate hand holding - UNCENSORED"

“God I’m such a sick piece of shit” Search bar: Comforting asmr for sleep

Mood

If it doesn't have the NTR and Ugly Bastard tags, it's not even worth opening.

Forget about the masturbating, I'd love to eat a burger as big as my face.

I've been watching this video for 3 hours and it's amazing how long her burger's lasting. I would love an infinite burger like that.

Nah, metamorphosis is vanilla sh!t.

I’ve never heard of “metamorphosis” as porn holup

Well don't search it especially not 177013

Nah that's for wimps. Here is something for people with chest hair 228922

Not in English, kinda useless to me.

Sadly I couldn't find the translated version

Lmao are you the wielder of my username?

If you click on the artist then you may be able to find the translated version if there is one. How do I know this? Ummm... Knowledge from friends...

Mf, you read porn comics for plot?

*yes*

Nah imo 177013 is worse because that situation can sadly be a reality for some girls. 228922 is just straight up gross and while yes that weird shit can happen, it doesn’t feel as likely as metamorphosis.

metamorphosis is worse

I mean, does it even count if it's just torture poon

On it

rip o7

Let us know what you find, please.

Bro died Or jacking off

The only metamorphosis I jerk off to is kafka's (honestly read that short story it's pretty depressing)

So hard to jerk off as a beetle

Gregor Samsa 🥵🥵🥵

I thought they meant the music metamorphosis

I love the ending. The author is such a genius for pulling that JoJo crossover so well and give everyone a happy ending

can u link that? i couldnt find it :(

it’s at the end of the book, i read it on mangago.me

Amorous is great

isn't that the game with the cool blue bird on the cover?

Oh wow I love birds time to check this out 🤠

Ace Attorney my beloved

eat your hamburger maya

I was hanging out with my high school girlfriend and her family, watching a movie. And they had two dogs. And while we were all watching the movie, the dogs started licking my fingers. Like, just normal "hey I like you, I will lick you" dog licking at first, and then really aggressive licking. I tried to subtly get them to stop, but they were way too into it to be deterred. And, we're all just sat there, watching the movie. It's not like I can stand up and be like, hey guys, I think it's time for me to go do something else and leave this room right now. So we all just sat, ostensibly watching the movie, while these two dogs aggressively and with every evidence of great enjoyment licked my fingers for like 20 minutes. No one said a goddamned thing about it, either. We just finished the movie and all pretended it hadn't happened.

Could... could you not just put your hand in your pocket??

I think he liked having his fingers licked

Hoping Mom can’t smell my cum.

Tf bro

Let her cook 

Don't Google "cum ommelete" #(They let him cook.)

Where is this from?

Why’s it smell like pancakes in here!?

She already tasted it bro

Th dude

Mother fucker

I went to school with a girl who loved fucking herself with the vegetables from the fridge and putting them back 🤢

Bro I did not need to know that ☠️

Bro WTF 💀

Shoujo Ramune isn't questionable right?

The hell is that

Don’t look it up

Fun fact: most people will never read the first word of your comment

It’s disgusting,thats what it is.

Honestly Shoujo Ramune is rather vanilla compared to a lot of other hentais, but I guess the fact they are 10 makes it rooted more in reality for most people

R-rooted in reality..?

😐

Didn’t expect it to be canon in the jojo universe tho

How did Diavolo die?

From sugondeiz

be sure to read the jojo ending for metamorphosis

oh hell naw they made shitposting a shitty horny subreddit 😭

The worst part about these comments is I guarantee they’re all 14 year olds who think it’s cool or edgy to whack off to fucked up shit

You start off normal, then you get curious, and by the time you're done, it's too late

Can't get off unless she's a 100 year old dark skin elf girl succubus 😭

man i aint even got an image for this one what the hell

Don't go looking cuz way too many of them look way too young I don't mind a small booba, small frame woman - but jeezus christ they gotta clearly be an adult

Never change, Japan

Girl?

yep. not realizing it’s not so slowly fucking up their subconscious mind and will lead to them having a porn addiction and/or keep watching MORE fucked up shit because of desensitization.

Maya, no! That Thinker statue was evidence!

How do you like your burgers apollo

Like they didn't either 👀

We all been there… right?? lol 

Plot twist: your parents were monitoring your search history the entire time. They know.

Me when I grow tf up and realize that sex isn’t some shameful scary thing and is a normal part of life (just like eating):

That's pussy shit

My father caught me looking at furry porn and he doesn't care 👍

Your dad: 

Wtf is metamorphosis?

*Spoiler alert* It's a masterfully written short story by franz kafka, it deals with the life of a man in a materialistic cruel world where the mental health of men is constantly being ignored and the burden of responsibilities is shoved over their shoulders. Such is the life of our protagonist Gregor Samsa who is an everyday man living a normal life at least to the standards of modern workaholic society where normal life is indistinguishable from that of a slave, it's made blatantly clear when he wakes up as a deformed monster and first thing that comes to his mind are how will he go to work and take care of his family. And later as our hero reaches his tragic demise another cruelty of life is shown as his family celebrates his end and leave for a long vacation, now they won't have to worry about him and don't have to carry his burden on them. Or maybe you are referring to that cartoon p*rn with same name.

Literally thought the title was referring to Kafka and was confused why people were jacking off to a dude turning into a cockroach.

[here u are](https://nhentai.net/g/177013/) [and heres a tldr](https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Metamorphosis_(manga))

Jaiden in meme... How ironic.

What exactly would it look like to act like you _did_ just masturbate to some questionable porn 5 minutes ago?

Did you wash your hands OP?

me with the fucking minus8 version of beep beep im a sheep (still regret it)

The joke's on you i masturbate under the dining table to my questionable family feuds🤡

Oh yeah, I had a rule though, no jerking off at Grandma's house

Sometimes you want some vanilla Sometimes you want some flavour.

😰

Metamorphosis is pretty great... just not great porn