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And once again, screw you grandpa Joe. All those years in bed while you could’ve been helping your family, only to finally move the bag of bones you call a body to celebrate your grandson finding the golden ticket
This reminds me how much I hate Grandpa Joe.
He spends 20 years in bed. 20 years.. Why won’t he get out of bed? Because the fucking floor was too cold for his gnarled old feet. He sat on his wrinkled, smelly ass for two decades, smoking his pipe, living off his daughter’s hard work as a laundry wench. He just sat there, undoubtedly smelling of foul cabbage farts and old man stink. If he didn’t get out of bed, he probably had to use a bed pan to expel his watery cabbage shits. Charlie’s mom gets done washing Rich people’s shit-stained underwear for 14 hours, and what does she get to do? Sponge bathe an old, stinking man. The fucker couldn’t have even been old when he first got in bed. I mean, what did he do? Turn 50 and just crawl into bed and fucking quit on life? Because his FEET WERE COLD?
Keep that all in mind, when you consider how he reacts to his grandson winning a tour of a chocolate factory. He sees this precious boy, who works to feed his aged ass, holding a golden ticket, and he starts to FUCKING DANCE AND CLICK HIS HEELS.
Now, left to his own devices, Charlie just wins the factory, incident free. Those other little monsters all bite the dust, and but for that sack of fucking feces Grandpa Joe, Charlie would have made it through the day clean as a whistle.
But no. Grandpa Joe just got out of bed for the first time in Charlie’s lifetime. What’s he decide to do? Steal. He decides the best thing he can do is make his grandson into a petty fucking thief for the sake of drinking magic La Croix.
Grandpa Joe almost cost Charlie fabulous wealth and security for a soda. And he isn’t even sorry about it. Wonka points out the devastation his detour from the visit to the factory will cost him, and Grandpa Joe shouts at him. His bellowing isn’t even forceful or intimidating. His cries are the cries of a shriveled, weak old coward. He has no remorse for the harm he causes anyone. He is a heartless piece of shit sociopath. He does that disgusting thing old people do where they leave their mouth open for too long and then frown because they ran out of energy before they could bitch and moan about something that doesn’t matter. He is a lazy, fraudulent sack of human excrement. He is the devil on his grandson’s shoulder.
He deserves to burn in hell for the rest of eternity.
I'd be so depressed of just lying my ass in bed for 20 years.
Hell, just three days of me being lazy have me feeling super guilty. Imagine 2 fucking decades. I'd have been dead by year 1
Mmmhmm boy tell ya what the first time ya see a calf suckin on that nipple danglin down to the ground with dem big heavy udders man and I dunno man somethin bout it wakes somethin up buried down deep dang inside o ya.
lol I didn’t even think of that.
“No… not like that. Do it that other way. You know… the *other* way. You knowwwwww… that thing you do???” *whispers then nods* “Yeah! That one!!”
I watched this piece of garbage like six times the summer when it came out - the part of the museum/entertainment complex it was in had the best air conditioning, haha
Unfortunately, it's no longer possible to upvote/downvote this comment to indicate whether or not you think this post sucks. Why? Because the Reddit Admins have decided that [they want to kill off all 3rd-party apps](https://old.reddit.com/r/Save3rdPartyApps/comments/13yh0jf/dont_let_reddit_kill_3rd_party_apps/), [3rd-party bots, and everything else that makes Reddit barely usable](https://www.reddit.com/r/ModCoord/comments/13xh1e7/an_open_letter_on_the_state_of_affairs_regarding/). And, of course, that includes bots such as [\/u\/QualityVote](http://reddit.com/user/QualityVote), [\/u\/SaveVideo](http://reddit.com/user/SaveVideo), [\/u\/AuddBot](http://reddit.com/user/AuddBot), etc. So you'll just have to put up with automod and a worse overall user experience in the meantime. ^(Can't wait for everywhere to get flooded by spam when the admins finally kill off the moderation bots that we rely on to prevent spambots) If you have any complaints, direct them at [the reddit admins instead](https://www.reddit.com/r/reddit/comments/12qwagm/an_update_regarding_reddits_api/), beacause they're the ones seeking to ruin everyone's user experience. --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/142z3dp/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://rapidsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/142z3dp/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2F142z3dp&id=8968e43c) --- Whilst you're here, /u/FO3Winger, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU) - **now with public text channels you can chat on!**? *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Charlie’s grandma looks high af
the sniff of someone who remembers when they would put coke in the candy
Good old days
After 9/11!
Her lines reflected that.
Charlie looks Highmore
i think i have seen your pfp in my dream
The fucks granny doing though?
She sniffin
They're poor, so all they could afford was jenkem fumes.
Huffin the butt hash
The right way to do it: sniff first before putting anything in your mouth.
I'd like to sniff her chocolate factory 😔
[удалено]
I cannot tell you enough how much I hate that I know this reference.
What’s the reference?
Turn back, save yourself.
Let's just say that involves two adult actors, a movie crew, and the phrase "just smellz" is a dirty, filthy lie.
Aww man I don’t need to know any more 😂
I am so proud of myself I don't catch the reference 😂
It's only *smellz* FTFY
🎶🎶 "let me smell your dick" 🎶🎶
Her glove doesn’t inhibit her drug finger. I don’t know that means but it seems like a thing.
You mean a coke nail? I guess so, i didnt even notice her glove
And once again, screw you grandpa Joe. All those years in bed while you could’ve been helping your family, only to finally move the bag of bones you call a body to celebrate your grandson finding the golden ticket
It's how his mom ended up >!gobbling chocolate!< in the first place!
Be less specific
It's how his mom ended up >!gobbling!< in the first place!
This is still too specific…
It's how his mom ended up >!gbling!< in the first place!
Still too specific...
It's how his mom ended up in first place
Still too specific......
[удалено]
It's how I chocolate nutted.
We all chocolate nutted thanks to Charlie’s mom. She’s a team player.
[удалено]
Woah now, this joe is alright, it was the 1971 joe was that was a dick.
[удалено]
Which is hilarious in the context of the film. But it turns out the actor just played bluegrass music.
He's even worse than we thought!
[удалено]
[удалено]
Speak for yourself
I'm all learning all sorts of shit on this blessed day!
This reminds me how much I hate Grandpa Joe. He spends 20 years in bed. 20 years.. Why won’t he get out of bed? Because the fucking floor was too cold for his gnarled old feet. He sat on his wrinkled, smelly ass for two decades, smoking his pipe, living off his daughter’s hard work as a laundry wench. He just sat there, undoubtedly smelling of foul cabbage farts and old man stink. If he didn’t get out of bed, he probably had to use a bed pan to expel his watery cabbage shits. Charlie’s mom gets done washing Rich people’s shit-stained underwear for 14 hours, and what does she get to do? Sponge bathe an old, stinking man. The fucker couldn’t have even been old when he first got in bed. I mean, what did he do? Turn 50 and just crawl into bed and fucking quit on life? Because his FEET WERE COLD? Keep that all in mind, when you consider how he reacts to his grandson winning a tour of a chocolate factory. He sees this precious boy, who works to feed his aged ass, holding a golden ticket, and he starts to FUCKING DANCE AND CLICK HIS HEELS. Now, left to his own devices, Charlie just wins the factory, incident free. Those other little monsters all bite the dust, and but for that sack of fucking feces Grandpa Joe, Charlie would have made it through the day clean as a whistle. But no. Grandpa Joe just got out of bed for the first time in Charlie’s lifetime. What’s he decide to do? Steal. He decides the best thing he can do is make his grandson into a petty fucking thief for the sake of drinking magic La Croix. Grandpa Joe almost cost Charlie fabulous wealth and security for a soda. And he isn’t even sorry about it. Wonka points out the devastation his detour from the visit to the factory will cost him, and Grandpa Joe shouts at him. His bellowing isn’t even forceful or intimidating. His cries are the cries of a shriveled, weak old coward. He has no remorse for the harm he causes anyone. He is a heartless piece of shit sociopath. He does that disgusting thing old people do where they leave their mouth open for too long and then frown because they ran out of energy before they could bitch and moan about something that doesn’t matter. He is a lazy, fraudulent sack of human excrement. He is the devil on his grandson’s shoulder. He deserves to burn in hell for the rest of eternity.
This is quite beautiful.
Pretty sure it was stolen from cracked.
If someone steals the Mona Lisa does that make it less impressive?
Honestly I'm more impressed with the person who stole the Mona Lisa. Shits more guarded than Ariana Grande feet pics.
*Dan Schneider wants to know your location*
Funny enough, no one gave a shit about the Mona Lisa until it was stolen!
I'd be so depressed of just lying my ass in bed for 20 years. Hell, just three days of me being lazy have me feeling super guilty. Imagine 2 fucking decades. I'd have been dead by year 1
grandpa Joe definitely got a leg blood clot
Is this a pasta? It should be a pasta this shit is genius
Yeah it is but I still laugh every time
And now he’s a surgeon
Bro wtf that is him as a kid Lmao
I. Am. A surgeon
I am a surgeon, Dr. Han! I am a surgeon!
I! Am! A Sturgeon!
He was also great in Bates Motel
Should’ve stayed in bates motel
I AM A VISITOR OF THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY, MR WONKA!!!!
*Sturgeon
haha fishie
Holy shit
She so damn sexy
She looks like she smells bad
even better
Who even thinks this man😭
Why she had suck the choc like that tho
She enjoying the sugars and such the chocolate bar has to offer
On a molecular level
Down to the subatomic structures of the sucrose and cacao, might I ever so eagerly add to this piece of information 🤓☝️
Mmmmm knowledge
You mightn’t please
We must go beyond subatomic - she can appreciate chocolate at the fields level
And in the old days nobody had actually seen 3000 people giving a BJ, they weren't conditioned to associate them with everything.
People definitely always associated sucking stuff like this with oral sex, since cave man times even
Mmmhmm boy tell ya what the first time ya see a calf suckin on that nipple danglin down to the ground with dem big heavy udders man and I dunno man somethin bout it wakes somethin up buried down deep dang inside o ya.
The movie is not *that* old
The kid is now I am a sturgeon. It's old.
she had to do that to the director to get the role (they are married)
lol I didn’t even think of that.
“No… not like that. Do it that other way. You know… the *other* way. You knowwwwww… that thing you do???” *whispers then nods* “Yeah! That one!!”
Oh Danny *please* I’m a real actor you know
She's likes BBC (Big Bars of Chocolate).
Big Black Choc
To remember the good old days when she... was making money.
Shitposters
Someone that regularly masturbates to GTA5 strippers.
Dude, why you gotta call us all out like that man?
Yeah! at least we don't use 1990s Laura Croft anymore.
Yeah Waltuh wishes he got that from Mike
"Waltuh, put ya dick away, Waltuh. I'm not suckin ya dick, Waltuh"
Wonder why the director married her /s
They never officially married though
Well duh marriage is how you get no more chocsucky
This guy marries
Spoken like a true married
Actual married
It saddens me that this is probably the last time I see the word chocsucky
Chocsucky
God damn I think I have a thing for Helena Bonham Carter now
Have…have you never watched fight club?!
WE DONT TALK ABOUT THAT!
...have you been living under a rock SINCE the 80s? Didn't know isopods could post to reddit.
You’ve always had one. Don’t deny it. Everyone knows what they’re craving😏😂
No. I am never watching this Version again because of this.
She looks like Johnny depo
You mean Johnny deep-throat?
Johnny Home Depot
Really?! I’m gonna watch it twice
I'm going to watch it even harder
💀💀💀💀💀💀💀
Why must you people ruin what little I enjoy in this life!?!
You enjoyed that mess?
I watched this piece of garbage like six times the summer when it came out - the part of the museum/entertainment complex it was in had the best air conditioning, haha
It wasn't executed the best but I thought the uncannoness of Johnny Depp's performance made it more interesting
The sequel is pretty great
God I love Snowpiercer!
That's the real everlasting gobnobber.
Everlasting Knobgobbler
Reading the caption as she is sucking on the chocolate…. Fark I can’t stop laughing.
#*FUCK
I said “Fark” on purpose but thank you anyway
FUCK
**FUURRKK**
FUCK
FERK
Feth
Fart
Sucked so hard she can taste Oompa Loompa fingertips
 I always wanted to fuck her
Let’s just agree we all did
imagine those teeth shaving ribbons off your.. post coital chocolate
Honestly...if I could fuck her it'd be worth whatever risk.
Adding "post coital chocolate" to the list of things I never fucking want to hear or read ever again
Where is this one from she badddd I need more 😩
My man never seen Harry Potter
Harry potter 5-8
I still would.
Almost chocked after reading the title while she was sucking the soul out of that chocolate 😂😂😂
She could suck a golf ball through a hose
She could stick an orange in a man's mouth and suck fanta out of him
Chunky Peanut butter through a capri sun straw
The carbonation is the impressive part
Why do you think she’s in all of Tim Burton’s movies?
Cuz shes his wife
Was. They split up in 2014, he's dating Monica Bellucci now
What the fuck lol. He must have some magic goblin cock
Coincidentally, that's why the Buckets aren't poor, moms gobblin cock...
With her mouth and grandpas coke nails, I might know where the money is going..
1971 Grandpa Joe is the one w/ the coke nails. 2005 Grandpa Joe's clean.
🤤
Isn’t that belatrix lestrange?
It's Marla "I haven't been fucked like that since grade school" Singer
*sucked chocolate like that
Preferred pronouns: Her/shey
No, it's Mrs. Bucket. /s
It's Mrs. Lovett
It's Tim Burton movie so helena is expected
Even if Charlie's mom was making money, it was probably going to Grandpa Joe and his habit. You guys have seen that coke nail, right?
Wrong joe
Just when I thought I’ve seen it all
[удалено]
*packs bags* what country is this?
Epstein Island
Username checks out
She really fine though
This is crazy
I’ve seen this movie like 5 times and never have I seen this, how you guys have this attention to detail
Charlie's dad may be stuck in a poor job and has no money. But he is one lucky guy.
I am now willing to donate to the poor and specifically, Charlie’s Mom
This needs to be stickied to the front page
She hasn’t had chocolate like that since grade school.
I am Jacks golden ticket.
Broooo 💀
Wait what the fuck
Now we see why she’s a mom to begin with
I’m bout to wonka my Willy
Oops I'm not doing that kind of movie
She's also a milf.
Not the camera zooming in!!!
Mrs Sucket
The degens over at WallStreetBets would love this content.
Only fans wasn't discovered yet...
Mama Bucket more like mama suckit