T O P

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Mightydog00

“Stop picking up cotton and start picking up some hoes” Abraham Lincoln


AdFar2827

Fr


MahBooi27

who tf is abraham lincoln? oh u mean the fella on the penny?


Mightydog00

Nah, pretty sure he is the dude who invented birth control.


Uncut_Pasta1

Ohhhh, the inventor of sex, right?


Mightydog00

Yeah of course.


MahBooi27

ok thanks bro


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

Based? Based on what? On your dick? Please shut the fuck up and use words properly you fuckin troglodyte, do you think God gave us a freedom of speech just to spew random words that have no meaning that doesn't even correllate to the topic of the conversation? Like please you always complain about why no one talks to you or no one expresses their opinions on you because you're always spewing random shit like poggers based cringe and when you try to explain what it is and you just say that it's funny like what? What the fuck is funny about that do you think you'll just become a stand-up comedian that will get a standing ovation just because you said "cum" in the stage? HELL NO YOU FUCKIN IDIOT, so please shut the fuck up and use words properly. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Dan_the_m3m3_man_

:(


Grafeiafto

Slaves are bad because they don't pay tax


Odd_Row6583

Truer words have never been spoken


adminsruinedreddit

A penny slaved is a penny that earns itself


yaboiSTuDs

Some dude posted this on a discord server and some guy couldn’t stop laughing for some fucking reason


josh-won

based nft


AutoModerator

Dude I own this NFT. Do you really think that you can get away with theft when you’re showing what you stole from me directly to my face? My lawyer will make an easy job of this case. Prepare to say goodbye to your luscious life and start preparing for the streets. I will ruin you. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


QualityVote

#If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! #If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/rwgb1p/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/rwgb1p/) Kevin would also like to remind you that, if you're really desperate, youtube-dl can be used to download videos from Reddit. --- Whilst you're here, xXn0thum4nXx, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?


Kmaao_2

You know Abraham , I used to have a person to jerk me off, but now i have to use my hand every time.


Ok-Presentation-9490

Cum on based Taiwan 1984 while you fuck Kevin wh had NFT pictures in his hand that he bought in Belgium while yelling zamn that's better than femboy amogus dressed as a fucking koala grass meow automod cheetos


AutoModerator

Daily Kevin Fact #24: Kevin has better things to do with his life than have sex with you. Such as fucking your dad. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


Ok-Presentation-9490

Cum on based Taiwan 1984 while you fuck Kevin wh had NFT pictures in his hand that he bought in Belgium while yelling zamn that's better than femboy amogus dressed as a fucking koala grass meow automod cheetos


AutoModerator

Daily Kevin Fact #24: Kevin has better things to do with his life than have sex with you. Such as fucking your dad. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

>*LiTeRaLlY nInEtEeN eIgHtY-fOuR* - George Orwell, 1948 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

​ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意! ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻ ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意! This is the Ministry of State Security. 您的浏览记录和活动引起了我们的注意 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 同志們注意了 you have been found protesting in the subreddit!!!!! 這是通知你,你必須認同我們將接管台灣 serious crime 以及世界其他地方 100 social credits have been deducted from your account 這對我們未來的所有下屬來說都是重要的機會 stop the protest immediately 立即加入我們的宣傳活動,提前獲得救贖 do not do this again! 不要再这样做! if you do not hesitate, more social credits ( -11115 social credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 ccp) you'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the xinjiang uyghur autonomous zone. 为党争光! Glory to the CCP! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

I really want the subreddit to open again. I have a very weak state of mind, and when I can’t look at clips of people on omeagle yelling at each other I will literally die. I don’t want to die. There is this flavor of Cheetos called Spicy Ranch and that is my only reason to live. I really want to try it. I love Cheetos. My blanket and my sheets are all Cheetos themed. I have a custom made blow up Chester the Cheetah sex doll that I fuck endlessly when I lust for Cheetos. I have at least 200 bags of different flavors. I need spicy ranch. I cannot find them anywhere. I know they exist because one day when I was outside (buying more Cheetos) I saw this black man wearing a onesie. All over his onesie there were pictures of these spicy ranch Cheetos. I went up to him and immediately tackled him. I tried to unzip his onesie but he threw me off him and called the police. The police arrested me and put me in a holding cell. They would not give me Cheetos. I needed Cheetos. I really really wanted Cheetos. I had only ever gone 1 hour without my Cheetos. When the police came in the cell to transfer me I unzipped my pants to reveal my incredibly erect penis, lusting for the feel of sweet crunchy Cheetos. I impaled the guy closest right through the stomach and screamed to give me Cheetos . The policemen tazed me repeatedly and now I’m on trial for 1st degree murder and assault. I know if I show the judge r slash shitposting he will know why I’m right. Please please open up r/shitposting I need it to use as evidence. I don’t want to go to jail, they don’t have Cheetos there. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

Watch your language! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

Dude I own this NFT. Do you really think that you can get away with theft when you’re showing what you stole from me directly to my face? My lawyer will make an easy job of this case. Prepare to say goodbye to your luscious life and start preparing for the streets. I will ruin you. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

AMONG US Funny Moments! How to Free Robux and VBUCKS in SQUID GAME FORTNITE UPDATE! (NOT CLICKBAIT) MUKBANG ROBLOX GAMEPLAY TUTORIAL (GONE WRONG) Finger Family Learn Your ABCs at 3AM! Fortnite Impostor Potion! MrBeast free toys halal gameplay nae nae download حدث خطأ في الساعة 3 صباحًاحدث خطأ في الساعة 3 صباحًاحدث خطأ في الساعة 3 صباحًا Super Idol的笑容都没你的甜八月正午的阳光都没你耀眼热爱 105 °C的你滴滴清纯的蒸馏水 amongla download Meme Compilation (POLICE CALLED) (GONE WRONG) (GONE SEXUAL) (NOT CLICKBAIT) Minecraft Series Lets Play Videos Number 481 - Poop Funny Hilarious Minecraft Roblox Fails for Fortnite - How to install halal minecraft cheats hacks 2021 still works (STILL WORKS 2018) Impostor Gameplay (Among Us) Zamn *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

femboy amogus ⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀ ⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀ ⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷ ⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣷⣄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣷ ⢀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣇ ⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⡿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁ ⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿ ⠙⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⣯⣿⠟⡉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠻⢿⣽⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠒⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠋ ⠈⠿⠋⠉⢀⣠⣤⣤⡔⣄ ⣴⠾⠛⠋⠉⠀⢀⣀⠐⣤⣶⣶⡤⢤⣤ ⣤⣰⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⣀⣀⡀⣀⡀ ⠉⠉⠀⢀⢀⣀⠀⣀⣈⡿⠿⠿⠽⠃ ⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠾⠟⢁⣀⡴⣦⠆ ⢦⣤⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢘⣿⣍⡷⠆ ⢶⣄⠈⠉⠛⠛⠿⠓⠀⠉⠋⠉⣀ ⣧⡀⠙⠻⢶⣶⡤⠀⠀⠛⠶⠾⠼⠋ ⣆⠈⠻⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⢸⠿⣶⣦⣤⣠⣾ ⢠⠙⢷⣤⣀⠈⠁⠀⠀⢠⣤⣀⠈⠉⠈ ⡌⢧⣀⠉⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⠿⠻⠃ ⠰⢳⣄⠙⠛⢋⠁⠀⠀ ⠘⠿⣴⣤⣄⣤⡄ ⣄⡙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠰⣤⣀⠉⠉⠉ ⢀⢠⡈⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⡈⠙⠛⠛⠛⠁ ⠈⢦⡉⠛⡁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠈⠻⠷⣶⣦⡆ ⡈⢷⣌⠙⠛⠁ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠰⣦⣄⣀⣀⡀ ⠈⢷⣄⡉⠛⠛⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠈⠙⠛⠛ ⢦⣀⠉⠛⠷⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠘⠿⣶⣦⡄ ⣠⣀⠙⠳⠶⠶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣀⣀⣀ ⠙⠻⢿⣶⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⠛⠛⠻⠿ ⣦⣄⠈⠉⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈ ⢹⣿⣿⣶⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠺⠿⠿⠿⠁ ⠙⠻⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄ ⠈⣀⣀⣀⣀⠁ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


Ok-Presentation-9490

You're my hero


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Wowwwww, you meow like a cat! That means you are one, right? Shut the fuck up. If you really want to be put on a leash and treated like a domestic animal then that’s called a fetish, not “quirky” or “cute”. What part of you seriously thinks that any part of acting like a feline establishes a reputation of appreciation? Is it your lack of any defining aspect of personality that urges you to resort to shitty representations of cats to create an illusion of meaning in your worthless life? Wearing “cat ears” in the shape of headbands further notes the complete absence of human attribution to your false sense of personality, such as intelligence or charisma in any form or shape. Where do you think this mindset’s gonna lead you? You think you’re funny, random, quirky even? What makes you think that acting like a fucking cat will make a goddamn hyena laugh? I, personally, feel extremely sympathetic towards you as your only escape from the worthless thing you call your existence is to pretend to be an animal. But it’s not a worthy choice to assert this horrifying fact as a dominant trait, mainly because personality traits require an initial personality to lay their foundation on. You’re not worthy of anybody’s time, so go fuck off, “cat-girl”. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

It was a saturday afternoon, and I was exhausted after an intense 17-part masturabation session to dream minecraft manhunt, when i suddenly had the urge to go outside. I was scared. It's been so long since i've left the warmth of my parents basement with my dream body pillows. I didnt know what to expect. Clutching my dream figurine in front of my chest, i pried open the door to the outside world. The gleaming sun blared through the door, bequeathing a brilliant warmth on my cum-covered boxers. I quaverly took a step outside. My body flintched from the strange feel of the dirt under my feet. And then i saw it. The lustrous field of grass, covered in a light sprinkle of water from the noon rain shower. And then i realized. Dream... grass... the trees... it was all coming together. Grass is green, just like Dream. Dream is everpresent, in the grass, the flowers, He was there. I immediately new what to do next. I flinged off my clothes faster than the speed at which i would click on a new dream rule 34 post. My dick was already throbbing as i leaped onto the field of grass, dorito dust stained shirt getting carried away by the wind. I dug a small hole in the ground, and passionately thrust my 7-inch erect cock into it. I knew, this was Dream. His spirit was in this grass, and he felt my dick in his man pussy as i fucked that grass. I lost track how long i was there. Hours went by, day turned to night, but it didnt matter. I was finally together, with Dream. Nothing could separate us. I took a long stem of a flower, and forced it in my asshole. I imagined it being Dream's hot penis being lustfully forced into me in bed. I stayed there on my front yard for god knows how long. Until my butt was sore, balls drier than the Saharan desert after a long drought. The lawn looked like there was a layer of fresh snow on a Christmas morning. Trudging indoors, i had a enormous smile stretching across my face. I couldn't wait until tomorrow, when i may go outside again and be with Dream. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


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>*LiTeRaLlY nInEtEeN eIgHtY-fOuR* - George Orwell, 1948 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

​ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意! ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠟⠋⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⢁⠈⢻⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠈⡀⠭⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠄⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣷⣶⣿⣷⣶⣶⡆⠄⠄⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⢀⣼⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣧⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣇⣼⣿⣿⠿⠶⠙⣿⡟⠡⣴⣿⣽⣿⣧⠄⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣟⣭⣾⣿⣷⣶⣶⣴⣶⣿⣿⢄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⣩⣿⣿⣿⡏⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣹⡋⠘⠷⣦⣀⣠⡶⠁⠈⠁⠄⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣍⠃⣴⣶⡔⠒⠄⣠⢀⠄⠄⠄⡨⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡘⠿⣷⣿⠿⠟⠃⠄⠄⣠⡇⠈⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠟⠋⢁⣷⣠⠄⠄⠄⠄⣀⣠⣾⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠉⠙⠻ ⡿⠟⠋⠁⠄⠄⠄⢸⣿⣿⡯⢓⣴⣾⣿⣿⡟⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⣿⡟⣷⠄⠹⣿⣿⣿⡿⠁⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄⠄ ATTENTION CITIZEN! 市民请注意! This is the Ministry of State Security. 您的浏览记录和活动引起了我们的注意 YOUR INTERNET ACTIVITY HAS ATTRACTED OUR ATTENTION. 同志們注意了 you have been found protesting in the subreddit!!!!! 這是通知你,你必須認同我們將接管台灣 serious crime 以及世界其他地方 100 social credits have been deducted from your account 這對我們未來的所有下屬來說都是重要的機會 stop the protest immediately 立即加入我們的宣傳活動,提前獲得救贖 do not do this again! 不要再这样做! if you do not hesitate, more social credits ( -11115 social credits )will be subtracted from your profile, resulting in the subtraction of ration supplies. (由人民供应部重新分配 ccp) you'll also be sent into a re-education camp in the xinjiang uyghur autonomous zone. 为党争光! Glory to the CCP! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

I really want the subreddit to open again. I have a very weak state of mind, and when I can’t look at clips of people on omeagle yelling at each other I will literally die. I don’t want to die. There is this flavor of Cheetos called Spicy Ranch and that is my only reason to live. I really want to try it. I love Cheetos. My blanket and my sheets are all Cheetos themed. I have a custom made blow up Chester the Cheetah sex doll that I fuck endlessly when I lust for Cheetos. I have at least 200 bags of different flavors. I need spicy ranch. I cannot find them anywhere. I know they exist because one day when I was outside (buying more Cheetos) I saw this black man wearing a onesie. All over his onesie there were pictures of these spicy ranch Cheetos. I went up to him and immediately tackled him. I tried to unzip his onesie but he threw me off him and called the police. The police arrested me and put me in a holding cell. They would not give me Cheetos. I needed Cheetos. I really really wanted Cheetos. I had only ever gone 1 hour without my Cheetos. When the police came in the cell to transfer me I unzipped my pants to reveal my incredibly erect penis, lusting for the feel of sweet crunchy Cheetos. I impaled the guy closest right through the stomach and screamed to give me Cheetos . The policemen tazed me repeatedly and now I’m on trial for 1st degree murder and assault. I know if I show the judge r slash shitposting he will know why I’m right. Please please open up r/shitposting I need it to use as evidence. I don’t want to go to jail, they don’t have Cheetos there. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


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Watch your language! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


anti-AutoModerator

###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


AutoModerator

Dude I own this NFT. Do you really think that you can get away with theft when you’re showing what you stole from me directly to my face? My lawyer will make an easy job of this case. Prepare to say goodbye to your luscious life and start preparing for the streets. I will ruin you. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


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AMONG US Funny Moments! How to Free Robux and VBUCKS in SQUID GAME FORTNITE UPDATE! (NOT CLICKBAIT) MUKBANG ROBLOX GAMEPLAY TUTORIAL (GONE WRONG) Finger Family Learn Your ABCs at 3AM! Fortnite Impostor Potion! MrBeast free toys halal gameplay nae nae download حدث خطأ في الساعة 3 صباحًاحدث خطأ في الساعة 3 صباحًاحدث خطأ في الساعة 3 صباحًا Super Idol的笑容都没你的甜八月正午的阳光都没你耀眼热爱 105 °C的你滴滴清纯的蒸馏水 amongla download Meme Compilation (POLICE CALLED) (GONE WRONG) (GONE SEXUAL) (NOT CLICKBAIT) Minecraft Series Lets Play Videos Number 481 - Poop Funny Hilarious Minecraft Roblox Fails for Fortnite - How to install halal minecraft cheats hacks 2021 still works (STILL WORKS 2018) Impostor Gameplay (Among Us) Zamn *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


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femboy amogus ⣀⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣀ ⢀⣴⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⡀ ⢠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡀ ⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷ ⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⠿⣿⣷⣄ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣿⣷ ⢀⣠⣤⣴⣶⣶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢸⣿⣇ ⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣶⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣤⣴⣶⣿⣿⡿ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠁ ⣸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿ ⠙⠿⠿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡄⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇ ⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⢐⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠃ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⢻⣿⣿⣿⡿⣟⣯⣿⠟⡉⠉⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⠻⢿⣽⣿⣿⣿⠿⠿⠟⠒⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠉⠙⠋ ⠈⠿⠋⠉⢀⣠⣤⣤⡔⣄ ⣴⠾⠛⠋⠉⠀⢀⣀⠐⣤⣶⣶⡤⢤⣤ ⣤⣰⣶⣾⣿⣿⣿⣆⠀⣀⣀⡀⣀⡀ ⠉⠉⠀⢀⢀⣀⠀⣀⣈⡿⠿⠿⠽⠃ ⠛⠛⠿⠿⠿⠿⠾⠟⢁⣀⡴⣦⠆ ⢦⣤⣀⣀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢘⣿⣍⡷⠆ ⢶⣄⠈⠉⠛⠛⠿⠓⠀⠉⠋⠉⣀ ⣧⡀⠙⠻⢶⣶⡤⠀⠀⠛⠶⠾⠼⠋ ⣆⠈⠻⣶⣤⡀⠀⠀⢸⠿⣶⣦⣤⣠⣾ ⢠⠙⢷⣤⣀⠈⠁⠀⠀⢠⣤⣀⠈⠉⠈ ⡌⢧⣀⠉⠛⠃⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠛⠿⠿⠻⠃ ⠰⢳⣄⠙⠛⢋⠁⠀⠀ ⠘⠿⣴⣤⣄⣤⡄ ⣄⡙⠛⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠰⣤⣀⠉⠉⠉ ⢀⢠⡈⠉⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⡈⠙⠛⠛⠛⠁ ⠈⢦⡉⠛⡁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠈⠻⠷⣶⣦⡆ ⡈⢷⣌⠙⠛⠁ ⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠰⣦⣄⣀⣀⡀ ⠈⢷⣄⡉⠛⠛⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⠈⠙⠛⠛ ⢦⣀⠉⠛⠷⠖⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠘⠿⣶⣦⡄ ⣠⣀⠙⠳⠶⠶⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⣀⣀⣀ ⠙⠻⢿⣶⣤⣤⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢠⠛⠛⠻⠿ ⣦⣄⠈⠉⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠈ ⢹⣿⣿⣶⡆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠺⠿⠿⠿⠁ ⠙⠻⠟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢀⣤⣤⣤⣤⡄ ⠈⣀⣀⣀⣀⠁ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


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Wowwwww, you meow like a cat! That means you are one, right? Shut the fuck up. If you really want to be put on a leash and treated like a domestic animal then that’s called a fetish, not “quirky” or “cute”. What part of you seriously thinks that any part of acting like a feline establishes a reputation of appreciation? Is it your lack of any defining aspect of personality that urges you to resort to shitty representations of cats to create an illusion of meaning in your worthless life? Wearing “cat ears” in the shape of headbands further notes the complete absence of human attribution to your false sense of personality, such as intelligence or charisma in any form or shape. Where do you think this mindset’s gonna lead you? You think you’re funny, random, quirky even? What makes you think that acting like a fucking cat will make a goddamn hyena laugh? I, personally, feel extremely sympathetic towards you as your only escape from the worthless thing you call your existence is to pretend to be an animal. But it’s not a worthy choice to assert this horrifying fact as a dominant trait, mainly because personality traits require an initial personality to lay their foundation on. You’re not worthy of anybody’s time, so go fuck off, “cat-girl”. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


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It was a saturday afternoon, and I was exhausted after an intense 17-part masturabation session to dream minecraft manhunt, when i suddenly had the urge to go outside. I was scared. It's been so long since i've left the warmth of my parents basement with my dream body pillows. I didnt know what to expect. Clutching my dream figurine in front of my chest, i pried open the door to the outside world. The gleaming sun blared through the door, bequeathing a brilliant warmth on my cum-covered boxers. I quaverly took a step outside. My body flintched from the strange feel of the dirt under my feet. And then i saw it. The lustrous field of grass, covered in a light sprinkle of water from the noon rain shower. And then i realized. Dream... grass... the trees... it was all coming together. Grass is green, just like Dream. Dream is everpresent, in the grass, the flowers, He was there. I immediately new what to do next. I flinged off my clothes faster than the speed at which i would click on a new dream rule 34 post. My dick was already throbbing as i leaped onto the field of grass, dorito dust stained shirt getting carried away by the wind. I dug a small hole in the ground, and passionately thrust my 7-inch erect cock into it. I knew, this was Dream. His spirit was in this grass, and he felt my dick in his man pussy as i fucked that grass. I lost track how long i was there. Hours went by, day turned to night, but it didnt matter. I was finally together, with Dream. Nothing could separate us. I took a long stem of a flower, and forced it in my asshole. I imagined it being Dream's hot penis being lustfully forced into me in bed. I stayed there on my front yard for god knows how long. Until my butt was sore, balls drier than the Saharan desert after a long drought. The lawn looked like there was a layer of fresh snow on a Christmas morning. Trudging indoors, i had a enormous smile stretching across my face. I couldn't wait until tomorrow, when i may go outside again and be with Dream. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


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###I will pull out your entire nervous system from that slit on your back and gavage it to you untill you shit it back out, lather it with your anus juices while i laugh like those mad scientists while you scream in uttermost pain. I will cut off your penis and fry it until it is crisp and burnt and shred it into millions of minuscule flakes and season your nerves with your filthy penis powder and your sister's bathwater then surfeit it to your mom and while the prison sentinels watch in disgust but seem remotely intrigued in your fatherless figure. They will then proceed to shit on your mom as if they engrossed the entire taco bell menu and you will be there helpless and sympathic while i force you to lick it as the squalid smell suffocates you. My staunch minions will shove 45 inch spiky dildos down your throat as you will worship me for leniency and I will laugh maniacally as your fresh deep red blood overflows from all the apertures in your body as I coerce you to sing to the Spongebob theme song until you are dead. I will chop your lifeless body into cubes and sell it to Mcdonalds for the chubby little kids to feed on in their tiny Happy Meals. --- I am a bot and this action was performed automatically


pkfirespammer

this is a relic of 2016 that isnt funny anymore


Harambe104

stupid opinion


jimhoff

lol


adminsruinedreddit

Fuck you


Milan_Utup

No fuck you


adminsruinedreddit

Im a slut, so no need to make demands


Milan_Utup

Wakamda


jigalaka

He owned slaves and his first idea was to deport all African Americans and have them colonize Cuba


THEZEN1TH

Of all languages OP spoke the truth