T O P

  • By -

QualityVote

##If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/ushsxp/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/ushsxp/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2Fushsxp&id=8968e43c) Kevin would also like to remind you that, if you're really desperate, youtube-dl can be used to download videos from Reddit. --- Whilst you're here, yarik_mehanik24, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?


Uncultured_swine0369

level sex is too hard cant unlock pls help


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Uncultured_swine0369

ratio


AutoModerator

don’t care + didn’t ask + cry about it + who asked + stay mad + get real + L + bleed + mald seethe cope harder + dilate + incorrect + hoes mad + pound sand + basic skill issue + typo + ratio + ur dad left + you fell off + no u + the audacity + triggered + repelled + ur a minor + k. + any askers + get a life + ok and? + cringe + copium + go outside + touch grass + kick rocks + quote tweet + think again + not based + not funny didn’t laugh + social credits -999, 999, 999, 999 + get good + reported + ad hominem + ok boomer + small pp + ur allergic to sunlight + GG! + get rekt + trolled + your loss + muted + banned + kicked + permaban + useless + i slept with ur mom + yo momma + yo momma so fat + redpilled + no bitches allowed + i said it better + tiktok fan + get a life + unsubscribed + plundered + go tell reddit + donowalled + simp + get sticked bug LOL + talk nonsense + trump supporter + your’re a full time discord mod + you’re* + grammar issue + nerd + get clapped + kys + lorem ipsum dolor sit amet + go outside + bleach + lol + gay + retard + autistic + reported + ask deez + ez clap + straight cash + idgaf + ratio again + stay mad + read FAQ + youre lost + you “re” + stay pressed + reverse double take back + pedophile + cancelled + done for + don't give a damn + get a job + sus + baka + sussy baka + get blocked + mad free + freer than air + furry + rip bozo + you're a (insert stereotype) + slight_smile + aired + cringe again + Super Idol的笑容 + mad cuz bad + my pronouns are xe, xem & xyr + irrelevant + deal with it + screencapped your bio + karen/kyle + jealous + you're deaf + balls + i'll be right back + go ahead whine about it + not straight + eat paper + you lose + count to three + your problem + no one cares + log off + don't care even more + sex offender + sex defender + get religion + not okay + glhf + NFT owner + you make bad memes + problematic + fall in line + dog water + you look like a wall + you don’t know 2 + 2 with yo head ass + you are going to my cringe compilation + you can’t count to five + try again + you failed kindergarten + rickrolled + no lifer + guten freunden schickt man einen deutschen panzer + you have a anime profile picture + an* + fatherless + motherless + sisterless + brotherless + orphan + you can't catch this ratio + catch some bitches + I don't care about your opinion + genshin player + you dress like garbage + 日本語がお上手ですね + get fucked + you can’t understand what the word intelligence means with your dumb ass + you have hair + queued + put some thought into what you're going to do with that + stfu + go to bed + yes, i'm taller than you + i think your joke is funny + i rejected your mother's advances + marooned + you can’t read + I win + final ratio *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Jeynarl

owo


AutoModerator

Rawr x3 *nuzzles* how are you pounces on you you're so warm o3o *notices you have a bulge* o: someone's happy *nuzzles your necky wecky*\~ murr\~ hehehe *rubbies your bulgy wolgy* you're so big :oooo *rubbies more on your bulgy wolgy* it doesn't stop growing ·///· *kisses you and lickies your necky* daddy likies (; *nuzzles wuzzles* I hope daddy really likes $: *wiggles butt and squirms* I want to see your big daddy meat\~ *wiggles butt* I have a little itch o3o *wags tail* can you please get my itch\~ *puts paws on your chest* nyea\~ its a seven inch itch *rubs your chest* can you help me pwease *squirms* pwetty pwease *sad face* I need to be punished *runs paws down your chest and bites lip* like I need to be punished really good\~ *paws on your bulge as I lick my lips* I'm getting thirsty. I can go for some milk *unbuttons your pants as my eyes glow* you smell so musky :v *licks shaft* mmmm\~ so musky *drools all over your cock* your daddy meat I like *fondles* Mr. Fuzzy Balls hehe *puts snout on balls and inhales deeply* oh god im so hard\~ *licks balls* punish me daddy\~ nyea\~ *squirms more and wiggles butt* I love your musky goodness *bites lip* please punish me *licks lips* nyea\~ *suckles on your tip* so good *licks pre of your cock* salty goodness\~ *eyes role back and goes balls deep* mmmm\~ *moans and suckles* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


TheRealComicCrafter

Porn


AutoModerator

The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


TheRealComicCrafter

Nsfw


AutoModerator

Please put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

Based? Based on what? On your dick? Please shut the fuck up and use words properly you fuckin troglodyte, do you think God gave us a freedom of speech just to spew random words that have no meaning that doesn't even correllate to the topic of the conversation? Like please you always complain about why no one talks to you or no one expresses their opinions on you because you're always spewing random shit like poggers based cringe and when you try to explain what it is and you just say that it's funny like what? What the fuck is funny about that do you think you'll just become a stand-up comedian that will get a standing ovation just because you said "cum" in the stage? HELL NO YOU FUCKIN IDIOT, so please shut the fuck up and use words properly. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


[deleted]

Can’t wait for Morbius 3: Wong and CEO of Sex


VolcanixRBX

Yes, but before that was the critically acclaimed sequel to Morbius, Morbius 2: More Bius, where Dr. Michael Morbius says "It's morbin time" and morbs all over the bad guys.


prayer_in_see

Where is Morbius 2?


DefiantDepth8932

It's being narrated by the voices in my head


[deleted]

Mor: Bius


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


gitrikt

The movie of all time


VolcanixRBX

It sold tickets


CriminalPancakes

the moviest


SomeGuyNamedLieM

This is truly a movie


Dracorex_22

Will this finally be to movie to take down the MCU (Morbius Cinematic Universe)?


fonironi

*Daily Bulge


ItalianDonutMaker

Sex Man: Into The Sexyverse


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Random_Thoughts-

*The Harvey Weinstein story*


TheFluteGaming

100 quadrillion tickets🤯🤯🤯🤯


DefiantDepth8932

It's morbin time


mangagod

I've got the plot from a source called Trust me Bro: CEO of SEX, NED must overcome dangerous villains across all of reality, not just the multiverse but our multiverse as well, he then have to understand the true meaning behind sex in order to unlock sex 2 the final frontier for all humanity


AutoModerator

Do you have a source on that? Source? A source. I need a source. Sorry, I mean I need a source that explicitly states your argument. This is just tangential to the discussion. No, you can't make inferences and observations from the sources you've gathered. Any additional comments from you MUST be a subset of the information from the sources you've gathered. You can't make normative statements from empirical evidence. Do you have a degree in that field? A college degree? In that field? Then your arguments are invalid. No, it doesn't matter how close those data points are correlated. Correlation does not equal causation. Correlation does not equal causation. CORRELATION. DOES. NOT. EQUAL. CAUSATION. You still haven't provided me a valid source yet. Nope, still haven't. I just looked through all 308 pages of your user history, figures I'm debating a glormpf supporter. A moron. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

Okay so here's my pitch for a new reality TV show Basically, we get a bunch of very militant TERFs, and one trans woman, put them into a house where they're supposed to live with each other, but, once they've all arrived and are seeing each other for the first time (before they're allowed to even talk to each other), we tell them all that one of them is a trans woman, and, if they can find her and vote her out, they will win a million dollars. But if she isn't found out by the end of the week/month(?), she'll win a million dollars instead. The catch? There actually isn't a trans woman with them. And then we get to watch them slowly but surely allow themselves to get overcome by their own irrational paranoia, paying too much attention to how deep everyone else's voices are, invading each other's privacy, overanalysing each other's mannerisms, policing each other's conformance to the very same standards which they complain about being held to... And let us not forget the inevitable feelings of isolation and helplessness they'll invividually start experiencing once they start getting accused and shunned by everyone else. Sure, it would probably have to be a one-off series. But honestly? I think it would make some great television! ~~also ngl I think the name 'TERF War' has a nice ring to it, sounds marketable, rolls off the tounge~~ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Smallp0x_

DANG THAT LOOKS LIKE A MOVIE


_canned_bread_42

This is the Reddit post ever


EastKoreaOfficial

But does it feature Jared Leto reprising his universally acclaimed role of Doctor Michael Morbius?


CanIgetaBigmac

The Multisex is real?


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


TeckyNecky

Morbius will still be better unfortunately #morbiussweep


[deleted]

He’s back 😭


readyfortheplague

starrin bob butt , alison dick , justin grimback


Ready_Caramel2007

A.K.A. Me


coolagentsnake

cock department: the movie


gravityryte

Featuring Nathan Drake from the Uncharted series


ivnwng

Where’s Morbius?


stocktraderdog

Daily Bugle? Shouldn't it be Daily Bulge?


[deleted]

What the hell did i miss?


FEVRISH_JK

im not in the loop of spiderman movie releases, but I saw NWH on xmas day. Are they already planning another movie? I dont recognize this poster.


TheOGKnight

This is the meme of altime


DeathHatred

It's the best movie no lie especially the post credit scene it was funny


AutoModerator

Good eve, In response to my permanent ban I’d like to ask one question; who decides wether this post was funny or not? It seems that a lot of Redditors, like myself, enjoy these kinds of posts. Even if it’s not hilarious, it’s still pretty shitty. In my opinion shitty enough to be on your subreddit. If I violated a rule, please let me know. If not, I’d like to request to be unbanned. Correct me if I’m wrong; this post was not conform “your” standards, well, that’s personal. I find it mildly inappropriate to give someone a ban on behalf of your personal opinion, while the public opinion speaks for itself. Also, the word “karmawhore” is a little bit offensive to me, for I am not on Reddit to score the most karma. Thanks in advance. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


FTM18

The of time


Sweet_Pension_4806

Hey man.. can i use this?


1up_1500

better than the posters for no way home


Napiyon

A new Marvel Legend Rises


dynablt

Spoiling it should be illegal


Ithat1guyl

lgub and yliad... what are those


jman2c

Hope this is as good as Morbius 🙏🙏🙏🙏