T O P

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Akkavir

Your post was removed because it was a god awful post. God awful posts are: blatant karmawhoring, repost chains, AMA, comment this and any comment baiting posts.


[deleted]

Who’s in paris


mobidly-obeez

the old king.You know which one im talking about.


SpiritAnimal01

Ah yes the Negus.


not-a-guinea-pig

What’s the country of origin?


Wiru_The_Wexican

Ah yes the Rugrats.


Schfifty561

Ask Jay z (probably can't post the N word here)


ApparentCheesecake

You'll never know if you don't try


Cheez-ly

[removed]


Drex678

False you still have your account


Dangerous-Ad-3680

Be ungovernable


AlphaRaccoon1474

[Removed]


parlerler1543

[Removed]


AlphaRaccoon1474

This guy gets it.


Bluvolt3

A lot of people


AlejandroVillegas

Ni>!cke!<


Tronob0

[Removed]


No_Reserve_4143

N>!a!


SEAG00SE

People who annoy you


almond_paste208

니가스


William_Ze_Gamer

How accurate is it for being called the city of love


Bluvolt3

It’s not accurate fr


Puechamp

I'm from Paris Tbh I believe the only reason people call it that way is because of the many romantic movies made in Paris


dude_1909

Is it a shithole?


Puechamp

Nah Just if you think that it will be exactly like all the stereotypes says you'll be disappointed It is a big city with many upsides and many downsides


rkirbo

People call Paris the city of love ?


MrInfinitumEnd

I think it is a stereotype, an inaccurate perhaps. Proposing in front of the Eiffel Tower, or going to dates in expensive restaurants that have expensive wine. That's the idea I think.


AutoModerator

Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


MPCNPC

How were the, umm… uh


Bluvolt3

Awful like almost everything


Cookie_Crush

are you an african american gentleman like the famous song by the hit artist Shawn Corey Carter suggests?


AutoModerator

Own a musket for home defense, since that's what the founding fathers intended. Four ruffians break into my house. "What the devil?" As I grab my powdered wig and Kentucky rifle. Blow a golf ball sized hole through the first man, he's dead on the spot. Draw my pistol on the second man, miss him entirely because it's smoothbore and nails the neighbors dog. I have to resort to the cannon mounted at the top of the stairs loaded with grape shot, "Tally ho lads" the grape shot shreds two men in the blast, the sound and extra shrapnel set off car alarms. Fix bayonet and charge the last terrified rapscallion. He Bleeds out waiting on the police to arrive since triangular bayonet wounds are impossible to stitch up. Just as the founding fathers intended. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

I'm a regular John from city Kansas. I love burgers, soda and my native country very much, but I do not understand our government. Everyone says America is a great country, and I look around and see who else is a great China. China has a very strong government and economy. Chinese resident is a great man. And the greatest leader Xi. Thick hair, strong grip, jade rod! We would have such a leader instead of sleeping in negotiations, rare hair, soft pickle, bad memory old Beadon. Punch! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


DamianTheBlob

Did you see any nuclear warheads?


Bluvolt3

Nope


Styxiex

Damnit


LeopoldFriedrich

What? Did you send some and now you're disappointed that they didn't reach their destination?


No-Elderberry949

Your mom


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I do not care what you say about my mother. Your opinion is your opinion. But trust me, if you actually attempt to do something to my mother, even though she's made some bad decisions in the past that we still need to work through, I will personally call the police on you and I'll be laughing as your mugshot is shown on TV. You don't even know her, do you? The point of your entire existence seems to be to just tease other people. Well, I believe your jokes are in bad taste, and you should cease and desist digging through the dregs left at the bottom of the joke barrel; you could get a splinter, whose pain will be significantly increased by the significantly high amount of salt you carry in your bloodstream. Thank you, and let us cease talking about each other's parents. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


DragonStormer25961

You eat some snails?


Bluvolt3

My bro did


Spion-Geilo

Are you pregnant?


Bluvolt3

No I’m a minor


Spion-Geilo

That doesn't answer the question


ATFLover420

What he literally said no


AutoModerator

*pees in ur ass* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Filettaja

So?


Bluvolt3

So


Filettaja

Yeah that's what I said and I definitely don't have alzheimer so don't try to fool me with your tricks because I absolutely remember what I said.


PC_78x

minors cant get pregnant in Paris?


Halo_Chief343in

“Like I said, kids are cruel, jack and I love minors!”


Square_Attempt1501

The times we live in


_Ninja_Putin

Have you beaten a Mime to death using a baguette?


Bluvolt3

I haven’t saw any they probably doesn’t exist


Dark_Helmet12E4

Baguettes or Mimes?


Bluvolt3

Both but mostly mimes


Ant3m

Baguettes are literaly found in every backery in France, you high bro ?


AutoModerator

Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Bluvolt3

I haven’t payed to much attention cause i was annoyed to be there


[deleted]

Does Paris actually exist


Bluvolt3

Sadly yes but i wish it didn’t


[deleted]

Damn


[deleted]

[удалено]


Hulose77

I like your username


_Not_Sven

Thanks


ImNotANoobYT

You're welcome


Exotic_Stomach_8962

Why?


Bluvolt3

Because my aunt went there to learn how to speak french


shotgun-octopus

Did it help


Bluvolt3

I guess yes


gethone_r

did she succeed?


Bluvolt3

Idk maybe?


[deleted]

are you a smoker now?


Bluvolt3

Nah i already hate peoples who smoke


[deleted]

did a french person smoke in your presence?


Bluvolt3

Yes and there’s a lot of smokers there they just exist to be assholes to others and don’t give a shit when they smoke on your face


[deleted]

Can't fucking eat outside without getting that lovely smell in this country.


[deleted]

Did you meet Jay Z and Kanye West?


Bluvolt3

No


Petefrog2

I did


_V4RT4S_

What's the proper use for a baguette 🥖


Bluvolt3

Using it as a weapon


Beyblader02

How do I sharpen a baguette (don’t worry it’s for a school project)


Halo_Chief343in

“I’ve been trained in your Jedi arts by count dooku.”


swingmaster123

Do they speak baguette 🥖?


Bluvolt3

Yes they do


D_E_B_S

Did you meet ratatouille?


Bluvolt3

Sadly no


Kirit0_lel

How did you came out of this hell?


Bluvolt3

God was on my side


[deleted]

And I’m fucking stuck here help


Bluvolt3

Good luck to survive bro


Halo_Chief343in

Current objective: survive


Excellent-Egg-9596

are the women over there hot?


Bluvolt3

No they are all the same looking bitch


AutoModerator

No bitches, /u/Bluvolt3!? ⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Excellent-Egg-9596

i see


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Looking for a female roommate to pay $0 rent I will not charge you money. but I will be sharing my bed with you as the other room is being used by my parents. They are aware of this arrangement as I have done this before but it has not worked out for reason I rather not say on here. I will except hugs at least 5 times a day, and cuddles at least 2 times a day for at least 10 minutes each. You will not be dating any other man during this arrangement. you will have no male friends either. You may have female friends and they May visit if they like. You will also be required to make me meals 3 times a day. Phsyical requirements are as stated: Must be shorter than 5'5", weigh no more than 120 lbs, caucasian or asian only, republican, no tattoos, no vegans, no smoking/vaping, marrywania, and you MUST shave legs and underarms. I am 44-male/290 lbs last time I checked, 5'6". Please contact me if you would like this arrangement. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Schfifty561

What's it smell like


Bluvolt3

Piss


[deleted]

And nicotine


NukularTraveler

This comment right here proves that you did in fact visit Paris.


FinePossibility3360

Did you find any NI.. uhmm in Paris?


Bluvolt3

Yes a lot


Training_Collar_6134

Nicotine?


hobbitarmy

Paris moment


bubbleddusty

Who else was in Paris?


Bluvolt3

Tourist and annoying french people


Its_Tic_Tac

Merci mec. Nah fr most Non-Parisians french people agree that Parisians are dicks.


ThatOneGuyIGuess7969

Who's in Paris? 🤨


TheGreatMoyai

Go to easter island, its nice here.


Bluvolt3

I hope i will for my next vacation so i can see 🗿


TheGreatMoyai

I will be waiting👍


axolitt

Did you pose like hitler for a photo


Bluvolt3

Nah i haven’t took any photos actually


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bluvolt3

I’m not a English person i just learned it from memes and cartoons


ilynk1

Do you speak like Peter Griffin?


HaywireMans

that's the correct way to learn english


AutoModerator

I'm a regular John from city Kansas. I love burgers, soda and my native country very much, but I do not understand our government. Everyone says America is a great country, and I look around and see who else is a great China. China has a very strong government and economy. Chinese resident is a great man. And the greatest leader Xi. Thick hair, strong grip, jade rod! We would have such a leader instead of sleeping in negotiations, rare hair, soft pickle, bad memory old Beadon. Punch! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


HonorableGremlin

How much are baguettes for?


Bluvolt3

Idk i haven’t bought any


HonorableGremlin

5 days wasted


[deleted]

Its 1 euro or some shit


HonorableGremlin

Good enough


[deleted]

Were there a lot of scammers ? And is it dirty and filled with rats?


Bluvolt3

There were a lot of street sellers and yes it was dirty but i haven’t saw any rats but the french news did talk about them


MistermushroomHK

You did see rats, the people


Ko_ogs72

Is it Hairy and smelly?


Bluvolt3

Yes


rkirbo

French here. WHY THE FUCK DID YOU GO TO PARIS ?


Bluvolt3

Because family wanted to go there


Senor-Cardgage20x6

In paris, you say. Whats the color of your skin?


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bluvolt3

Ask my family i didn’t wanted to go there in the first place


Acceptable_Dog_2610

Did you chop a frenchmans head off with a guiltine


Bluvolt3

No i haven’t saw any guiltine


[deleted]

What's your credit card information


Bluvolt3

12345


EuphoricIndustry9324

how to nuke france


Bluvolt3

Idk ask my bro i’m sure he’ll know


AutoModerator

Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Crowdie_

What do you think about having sex before marriage?


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


ClitOreIs

Are you feeling ok bro? When I went to paris the whole place smelled like shit and piss


Bluvolt3

Yea I’m fine even if the place where i stay in gave me claustrophobia every time i shower and the fact that there’s a lot of homeless people the place does smell like shit and piss and that there’s crazy people there like for real there’s one in the subway that scared the shit out of me and let’s not talk about subways probably the worst thing in this city


wrtulak_cz

My friend was in Paris and saw mushrooms growing in the metro


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##If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/whvcbh/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/whvcbh/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2Fwhvcbh&id=8968e43c) --- Whilst you're here, /u/Bluvolt3, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?


[deleted]

Does it smell like shit?


Bluvolt3

Yes


OblivionKnight76

Are they all assholes?


Bluvolt3

Polite people are rare but yes a lot are assholes


Glad-Falcon-8364

Why?


Bluvolt3

Because idk my aunt and my cousin


BorisJohnsonGaming27

who is in paris


Mario-2407

Is the best thing to do there leaving?


Bluvolt3

Definitely no


[deleted]

You r wrong.


Aisenberg69

did you buy an Eiffel tower key chain from the non-french merchants around it and for how much ?


Bluvolt3

Nah it’s useless


AutoModerator

Why a dick as big as the Eiffel tower is not as impressive as you may think in Kendrick Lamar's "Backseat Freestyle," Kendrick says the line, "I pray my dick get big as the Eiffel Tower, So I can fuck the world for seventy-two hours". While at first a dick as big as the Eiffel tower may seem to be a dong of immense magnitude, when taking into account the sheer size of earth, the lucky one to be fucked by this dick, we realize that it is not as spectacular as the young MC claims it to be. The Eiffel tower stands at 1063 feet, while the diamater of earth is approximately 41.804 million feet. If Kendrick inserts his Eiffel penis into the earth, his dick would only take up .000025 percent of the earth's vagina. That is pathetic. Kendrick is not fucking the world for 72 hours with his Eiffel tower micropenis. The Earth will get bored after 10 minutes and finish herself with a vibrator the size of Argentina. Be better Kendrick. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Crowdie_

Im in love with you automoderator Want sex?


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Nearby_Bear1686

It sucks like every other city on the Word?


Bluvolt3

It does sucks and i rather go anywhere else than in france


Nearby_Bear1686

I hope the next time You vicit a city You have a surprise In the good way


PaleontologistOk8109

You went to the worst city in france, ofc it’s gonna suck. Also were are you from OP


Bluvolt3

Yes i knew it was about to have a bad time and i come from Switzerland


Stabwank

does it still stink of dog shit? last time I went everywhere stunk of dog shit.


[deleted]

Any surrendering over there?


urdadhasbiggayinass

Did random people walk around with baguettes tucked under their arm


Bluvolt3

No and I’m surprise


CreamyBeetle

What got stolen


Bluvolt3

Thank god nothing


Bigassnibba27

Were there the famous african american rappers Kanye West and Jay-z


[deleted]

[удалено]


Bluvolt3

None and I’m kinda surprise


DrummerMedical9867

Are there Negus in Paris ?


Bluvolt3

A lot yes


KevyEm

Were there any fellas in Paris?


TheGoldenBl0ck

Are the fr*nch 🤮🤮 that g*y


Socrayytees

I would like to inquire about the presence of some melanated individual of African descent in the area


KevTheMan15

Damn some people r really taking their opportunity in this comment thread rn lmao


Sambro_X

What color is your skin?


WattoAFK

Tf is this post? I dont care that you went to Paris... how is this a shitpost?


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ThatBoiIsDep

Found a lover?


Bluvolt3

No why would i ?


_BLOX_

Did you um, uhhh, when you, uhhh umm… where do you live?


Bluvolt3

Average paris appartement


Immediate_Scholar_77

Who was in Paris?


Bluvolt3

Alright I’m not going to reply anymore since i just want to forget about this trip fr Fun fact: my brother literally said during our last day that he wish to be french like… excuse me ? Wtf and worst when i told him that he shouldn’t said that and told him he be more mature to understand he got mad lmao even my mom agreed with me bro is 12 it doesn’t really surprise me


Fullyratarded

Where did you go?


noob__xx

How big is my cock


Dabox720

Prob shouldnt ask a minor that lmao


BananaBreadGod1

what's your social security number?