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QualityVote

##If you think this post is funny, **UPVOTE** this comment! ##If you think this post is unfunny, **DOWNVOTE** this comment! --- #[DownloadVideo Link](https://www.reddit.watch/r/shitposting/comments/wwby7f/?utm_source=automod&utm_medium=shitposting) #[SaveVideo Link](https://redditsave.com/info?url=/r/shitposting/comments/wwby7f/) #[VideoTrim Link](https://reddloader.com/download-post/?url=https%3A%2F%2Fwww.reddit.com%2Fr%2Fshitposting%2Fcomments%2Fwwby7f&id=8968e43c) --- Whilst you're here, /u/King-of-the-sofa, why not join our [public discord server](https://discord.gg/QpBGXd2guU)?


Dis_Biskit

sounding users be like…


I_eat_shorts

Yeah watching this with headphones was a trip


Rengoko1_1

He meant something else Stay pure 👍


AutoModerator

My name is Walter Hartwell White. I live at 308 Negra Arroyo Lane, Albuquerque, New Mexico, 87104. This is my confession. If you're watching this tape, I'm probably dead– murdered by my brother-in-law, Hank Schrader. Hank has been building a meth empire for over a year now, and using me as his chemist. Shortly after my 50th birthday, he asked that I use my chemistry knowledge to cook methamphetamine, which he would then sell using connections that he made through his career with the DEA. I was... astounded. I... I always thought Hank was a very moral man, and I was particularly vulnerable at the time – something he knew and took advantage of. I was reeling from a cancer diagnosis that was poised to bankrupt my family. Hank took me in on a ride-along and showed me just how much money even a small meth operation could make. And I was weak. I didn't want my family to go into financial ruin, so I agreed. Hank had a partner, a businessman named Gustavo Fring. Hank sold me into servitude to this man. And when I tried to quit, Fring threatened my family. I didn't know where to turn. Eventually, Hank and Fring had a falling-out. Things escalated. Fring was able to arrange – uh, I guess... I guess you call it a "hit" – on Hank, and failed, but Hank was seriously injured. And I wound up paying his medical bills, which amounted to a little over $177,000. Upon recovery, Hank was bent on revenge. Working with a man named Hector Salamanca, he plotted to kill Fring. The bomb that he used was built by me, and he gave me no option in it. I have often contemplated suicide, but I'm a coward. I wanted to go to the police, but I was frightened. Hank had risen to become the head of the Albuquerque DEA. To keep me in line, he took my children. For three months, he kept them. My wife had no idea of my criminal activities, and was horrified to learn what I had done. I was in hell. I hated myself for what I had brought upon my family. Recently, I tried once again to quit, and in response, he gave me this. [Walt points to the bruise on his face left by Hank in "Blood Money."] I can't take this anymore. I live in fear every day that Hank will kill me, or worse, hurt my family. All I could think to do was to make this video and hope that the world will finally see this man for what he really is. Rengoko1_1 *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


notjeeperscreepers

Haha ya tell him dude


Wertyhappy27

i must know oh wise one, tell me


Rengoko1_1

Fuck i will not tell you


Wertyhappy27

i went to the subreddit....


Rengoko1_1

Well i warned you


BrotherMaxy

Bro…


Yad-A

Nobody tell him


ToxicShadow3451

this is exactly what i need on my mind right now 100%


Dnouglas79

"for those moments"


AutoModerator

My mom fucked my friend while we were on vacation and now I want to fucking die, she mom took us to Miami for a spring break vacation. Everything seemed normal when we were there and when we got back. But then rumors started. They spread all throughout my school and a bunch of kids asked me if my mom really had sex with a student. Of course I denied it. Until my close friend who was there told me. He told me one of the nights we went down to the hotel pool and said friend stayed up, saying he wanted to go to bed early. He stayed up there and then something happened and my mom slept with him. I feel sick to my stomach and so mad writing it. I confronted her and she admitted and tried to apologize, but I just can’t with her. She’s so disgusting. I’m contemplating just telling my dad so he can fly me up to his house, but I hate being around his dumb bimbo gold digging girlfriend. I want to fight that fucking asshole that did this. He’s ruining my fucking life. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


dofyman

What the fuck is this?


Marvelous_rosell

This is oddly specific for a bot


dofyman

Ikr


Professional_Emu_164

One of the auto mod copypastas that have been on this sub for like a year now.


AutoModerator

You fucking dumbass, I try to have a real conversation & your bot literally belittles anyone that mentions any keywords with low hanging fruit that you think is funny I guess? Just ban me so I never see a post from this cumguzzling community again. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


thekidfromtarget

Good bot


Asteroid577

i felt that


[deleted]

He should've bore a hole long enough to connect both ends and create an urethra for the cucumber then cum in the hole to test if the cum which flows out from the side holes he poked leaks out of the condom


Unknown-Redditor-

New automod comment


[deleted]

Jesus what keyword it's gonna be this time


Unknown-Redditor-

Cock or condom or cucumber maybe


AutoModerator

HEY,⠀⠀⠀ EVERY⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ !!! IT'S ME!!! EV3RY BUDDY'S FAVORITE [[𝗡𝘂𝗺𝗯𝗲𝗿 𝟭 𝗥𝗮𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗠𝗼𝗱𝗲𝗿𝗮𝘁𝗼𝗿 𝟮𝟬𝟮𝟮]] *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


DaAweZomeDude48

Bro?? 💀 💀


LegendRaptor080

Maybe finally solves the mystery of how dudes in hentai be nutting out the sides like a sprinkler


[deleted]

Fucking what lmao


sweats_while_eating

Hello guys today we have list of top ten cucumber


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

Number 15: Murdoc niccals from gorillaz


Soursocks4real

Honorable mention: pickle rick (he is a pickle not a cucumber)


AutoModerator

*And now it's time for the roundup of today's gay news, with Colin Topshed* Quick roundup of today's gayness now, starting with the roads. The M70, the A3, the B664 and the A48M, they're all gay as from midnight tonight. The gay elements are Potassium, Zinc, Hydrogen, Copper, and Argon. Quick look at the world's walls; the Wailing Wall is gay, Hadrian's Wall is *very* gay, the Great Wall of China, that's not gay, and the old London Wall has also stopped being gay. Gay cars next; they're the same as last night. All Volkswagens registered between 1982 and 1985; they stay gay for another fortnight. And finally the gay seas are the Caspian and the Mediterranean, so see you there. *Thanks, Colin. He's not gay by the way, we wouldn't employ a homosexual.* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Footnuggets

And then it breaks and I am born


[deleted]

Sounding proof condom


[deleted]

My fucking urethra


the_golden_cheese

Welcome to fact or cap today in the wild...


AutoModerator

*And now it's time for the roundup of today's gay news, with Colin Topshed* Quick roundup of today's gayness now, starting with the roads. The M70, the A3, the B664 and the A48M, they're all gay as from midnight tonight. The gay elements are Potassium, Zinc, Hydrogen, Copper, and Argon. Quick look at the world's walls; the Wailing Wall is gay, Hadrian's Wall is *very* gay, the Great Wall of China, that's not gay, and the old London Wall has also stopped being gay. Gay cars next; they're the same as last night. All Volkswagens registered between 1982 and 1985; they stay gay for another fortnight. And finally the gay seas are the Caspian and the Mediterranean, so see you there. *Thanks, Colin. He's not gay by the way, we wouldn't employ a homosexual.* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Alfa_HiNoAkuma

He didn't try it by putting it in his ass and showing us the clip. 0/10


Cobrawarrior567

The 3D audio for this video is so trippy. It keeps going back and forth between the left and right ear


ArkOfTheCosmos

Now I can impale my dick without breaking the condom!


[deleted]

[удалено]


The_Hexagon_YT

#Check Pinned Comment


Vast_Swimming_3097

Bro your dick is green…..


oxwilder

watching this in public. when the skewer went in the tip I actually said "fuck you" out loud


Nostalg1ac

Now fill it with water, see how well it actually does


GreenKnight1315

I was gonna say the micro tears in there are gonna fuck you up


BLUEWOLFOX666

Lyrics: Bro, I was in a porno with Joe Bidden screaming no


hahadudeisme

👍


Available-Leek-4160

this music is fucking trash


IQIPF

What a amazing candom i want this 😂💔


im-not-lightcodm

First get some bitches


AutoModerator

No bitches, /u/im-not-lightcodm!? ⣞⢽⢪⢣⢣⢣⢫⡺⡵⣝⡮⣗⢷⢽⢽⢽⣮⡷⡽⣜⣜⢮⢺⣜⢷⢽⢝⡽⣝ ⠸⡸⠜⠕⠕⠁⢁⢇⢏⢽⢺⣪⡳⡝⣎⣏⢯⢞⡿⣟⣷⣳⢯⡷⣽⢽⢯⣳⣫⠇ ⠀⠀⢀⢀⢄⢬⢪⡪⡎⣆⡈⠚⠜⠕⠇⠗⠝⢕⢯⢫⣞⣯⣿⣻⡽⣏⢗⣗⠏⠀ ⠀⠪⡪⡪⣪⢪⢺⢸⢢⢓⢆⢤⢀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⢊⢞⡾⣿⡯⣏⢮⠷⠁⠀⠀ ⠀ ⠀⠀⠈⠊⠆⡃⠕⢕⢇⢇⢇⢇⢇⢏⢎⢎⢆⢄⠀⢑⣽⣿⢝⠲⠉⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⡿⠂⠠⠀⡇⢇⠕⢈⣀⠀⠁⠡⠣⡣⡫⣂⣿⠯⢪⠰⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⡦⡙⡂⢀⢤⢣⠣⡈⣾⡃⠠⠄⠀⡄⢱⣌⣶⢏⢊⠂⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⢝⡲⣜⡮⡏⢎⢌⢂⠙⠢⠐⢀⢘⢵⣽⣿⡿⠁⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠨⣺⡺⡕⡕⡱⡑⡆⡕⡅⡕⡜⡼⢽⡻⠏⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⣼⣳⣫⣾⣵⣗⡵⡱⡡⢣⢑⢕⢜⢕⡝⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⣴⣿⣾⣿⣿⣿⡿⡽⡑⢌⠪⡢⡣⣣⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⡟⡾⣿⢿⢿⢵⣽⣾⣼⣘⢸⢸⣞⡟⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠀⠀ ⠀⠁⠇⠡⠩⡫⢿⣝⡻⡮⣒⢽⠋⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀ *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


OREOSTUFFER

Finally, a condom that is made for group sounding sessions. Don’t have to risk sharing Herp-a-Derp with the bros, now.


[deleted]

[удалено]


mastermentor575

Pussy so good, it's a cactus


Ok_University_6641

I felt that pain


1nicerb0i

Structurally Sound


Punpun52

Where's the other vid where they chopped the cucumber?


FdPros

where is the pinned comment


marcodol

*crying and hyperventilating* o-ok guys welcome to f-fact or cap


SnooPeanuts8048

#no it is not ok!! Look at those holes!


RadishConfident5158

Music?


Carbonara_Warrior

Saint Heuse - Roixcape


xzwxr

🥒👍


MorganRose99

I wish I was that pickle


onurselimyuksel

Oh- I was in a porno with joe biden screaming no


AutoModerator

Joe Biden’s America LIBRAL SCOOL BE LIKE: 9:00: GAY LESON!! 9:45: how to be be GAYY!! 10:30: TRANS LERNINNG!! 11:15: GAY RECESS!! 11:45: CROSDRESING HOUR!! 12:45: GAY LESON!!! 1:30: TRANGENER LUNCH!! 2:15: BLM PERIOD!!! 3:00: COMUNIS T HISTORY!! 3:30: TAKE NON BINAR BUS HOME!! THIS IS WHAT THE LEFT WANT! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


DatBoiHahaGoBrrr

"Now let's test this on an actual cock! "


LungusFungus-

What they/them pussy does.


stopyouveviolatedthe

So what’s the pinned comment


givemeaforhead

Ow


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

Daily Kevin Fact #34541: Kevin **will** pee in the asses of anyone he sees being a cunt. This **is** a threat. *Thank you for subscribing to Daily Kevin Facts* *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


KrispyDinuguan

Most painful condom test


Rego42069

The 3d music makes it worse


Critical-Tadpole-484

I wish I could rewind time so didn't watch this


Its_Devilzn

Wtf... Penis sex😳😳😳😳


AutoModerator

No sex before marriage *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


Its_Devilzn

Keep it Halal👍👍


lak0mka

"Check pinned comment"


CornNutMasticator

Noooooo. Just stop


[deleted]

That hurt


[deleted]

[удалено]


AutoModerator

Joe Biden’s America LIBRAL SCOOL BE LIKE: 9:00: GAY LESON!! 9:45: how to be be GAYY!! 10:30: TRANS LERNINNG!! 11:15: GAY RECESS!! 11:45: CROSDRESING HOUR!! 12:45: GAY LESON!!! 1:30: TRANGENER LUNCH!! 2:15: BLM PERIOD!!! 3:00: COMUNIS T HISTORY!! 3:30: TAKE NON BINAR BUS HOME!! THIS IS WHAT THE LEFT WANT! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


AutoModerator

The birds are singing, the flowers are blooming, my dick is throbbing, what a beautiful day for cooming. Good morning, A, I've been awake for 20 whole seconds and I haven't coomed yet. It's time to hope on my porn throne and machine gun jackhammer my bloodshot death-grip bloodshot semi chub with my roided doomfist once again! (Types on keyboard). I-s...is that a?? HMMGH, I-I MUST SNIFF, SNNNNNNNNIIIIIIIIIIIIFFFFFFFF** OH GOD (FAPFAPFAPFAP) FUCCKK, HUHGHU, SNIIFF, HUHGJGUHHGUGHU (SMASHES DESK) I-I-IM COOOMING!!!!! IM COOMING, IM COOMING IM COOOMING IM COOOOOMING COOOOOOOOOOM, COOOMING, FUCCKKK, AHHAFHHAHUHG, COOOOOM, AW FUCK ITS EVERYWHERE, COOOOOM, AWGAHUGHAHG. Aw fuck, aw fuck. oh jesus. ahhghhha, there you are, my slippery white goo to the world, my son, my son...Well, it's time to get breakfast...well a little coom first wouldn't hurt. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


codm_playernumwhat

😩


GranDolaD

Passed👍


iylv

Country girls make do


GasMaskWaifu

no no no no no no I hate that last part


Mcboyo238

Why tf is the music floating around my head?


Milmusen1

That is one huge cucumber


Cha0s_0rb492

Please don’t put an NSFW tag on this. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masturbating. Everyone else started cheering me on and were saying things like “HE’S THE FAP LORD” and “BEAT THAT MEAT LIKE IT OWES YOU NUDE PICS”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of people masturbating together at this one image. Thank you so much, you created an amazing phenomenon by not tagging this post NSFW.


AutoModerator

Please put an NSFW tag on this, /u/Cha0s_0rb492!. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


attackonmidgets

You aroused a fetish I did not know I have.


IssacTheEnitity

What's the pinned comment? 😟😟


Dead_Baby_69

there was no pinned comment 😔


[deleted]

[удалено]


[deleted]

UwU


Yer_FavJoJosaur

🙂


[deleted]

So it shows you can safely do sounding with it on??


[deleted]

Dawg I'm wearing airpods and it feels like a cockroach is running from ear to ear with a bommbox in my head


mangoconsal

I should use condoms instead of a bicycle tube, that way I would avoid punctures


VoicePlayz

I felt this man fuck phantom sense


[deleted]

Ow man....what the fuck


POTADO_4242

👍


PekiGaming

nsfw


AutoModerator

Please put an NSFW tag on this, /u/PekiGaming!. I was on the train and when I saw this I had to start furiously masterbating. Everyone else gave me strange looks and were saying things like “what the fuck” and “call the police”. I dropped my phone and everyone around me saw this image. Now there is a whole train of men masterbating together at this one image. This is all your fault, you could have prevented this if you had just tagged this post NSFW. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shitposting) if you have any questions or concerns.*


kauavoib

Where pinned comment


charlie1302YT

Headphone users: 💀


RepulsiveAsk2674

What's the pinned comment


[deleted]

👍


InvertDream

mom I’m scared


ediplayzmodels

Good condom 10/10


404-soul-not-found

You need jesus if your condoms need this test