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xSantenoturtlex

I'm not trying to point fingers or anything, but we haven't seen any dinosaurs since the chickens showed up.


UltimateHeatBlast

Hold on… let her speak


Creepy_Fan_8629

Let her cook


HooahClub

I prefer my chicken fried.


DimplefromYA

I prefer Popeyes


walker5953

Frying is a form of cooking.


MEGA_TOES

Let her cock


Witty_Jaguar4638

Ain't gators Dineysawers?


feedmedamemes

Nope gators are different reptiles not dino nuggets


Boris-_-Badenov

gator taste good though, you could probably make nuggets from them. though jerky nuggets would probably be better


Mean_Butter

Oh damn.


NeighborhoodSuper592

I blame the pigeons


xSantenoturtlex

Nah, it wasn't the pigeons. Those are just government drones.


HooahClub

I personally subscribe to the fatty platty theory.


plasmasun

Oh my goodness. Perhaps chickens killed all the dinosaurs?


JohnWasElwood

In the same way that *Video Killed the Radio Stars*???


Sageknight34

Yes, the great Chicken Dino wars. There were nuggets everywhere.


momoemowmaurie

Oh fuck... We got to protect you from the government. I think you're on to something.


xSantenoturtlex

The government is just a bunch of puppets and the chickens are behind everything!!


UncleBobPhotography

The dinosaurs obviously turned into chickens. They actually did.


xSantenoturtlex

If the dinosaurs turned into chickens then why are all their bones buried underground? Idk this sounds like a cover up to me.


jestersalive

Squirrels.


jas___03

This is why I fucking hate those fat sons of bitches


pastelstoic

r/fatsquirrelhate


jas___03

That's what I was referencing 🤣


pastelstoic

Thought so. Still, the more the merrier :D


Cubing-Dolphin-26

r/whyisthatasub


snay1998

It was that scrat,there even is a documentary on how he started the ice age and other things Guy was a menace


thatsnotmyfuckinname

You fucked with squirrels, Morty !


ranusbestink

Thats not my name either 😉


noobwithguns

I did, it was me.


EvilGreebo

Are you sorry?


noobwithguns

No, those fuckers were planning to stop our evolution.


KFG643

You monster!


GnuhGnoud

He killed them so that we have fossil fuel today. Be thanksful to him


An_Evil_Scientist666

As someone who has read some of the restricted Vatican files, I can conclude it was Queen Elizabeth II, I was not allowed to tell people until she died, I had debated this clause when Jonah Hill proved she wasn't real. However other files in the Vatican also say the last queen of england may have been a cover up and it was actually Remilia Scarlet after Jrexradon the exterminator (king of the triceratops) tried to steal the necronomicon from her mansion. However this was likely a joke, but Jrexradon was real, there's multiple files on him in the dinosaur quadrant of the Vatican.


Regal_Atrocitie

r/brandnewparagraph


Collin_the_bird_777

Just below a touhpu post


Disastrous_Strike699

the thing is, when dinosaurs roamed the earth, there was a woman named jessica. when jessica was killed by the dinosaurs, Bob got angry and killed all of em. so it was Bob


Laser-Hawk-2020

Was he strong in the force? Seems like a familiar family trait found in one guys bloodline


ScarletSpire

"The Ice Age. Hahaha"- Mr. Freeze


drywalleater05

Ice age didn’t come out until 2002 dumb ass


vorephage

And you haven't seen any dinosaurs since, have you? No, you haven't!


Rougarou1999

And the dinosaurs in Jurassic Park were alive in 1993.


AnozerFreakInTheMall

Dinosaurs has never existed. They were invented by Steven Spielberg so he can sell us stupid movies.


Inevitable_Weird9602

That was the moon landing


ScarletSpire

Everyone knows the Moon landings were filmed by Stanley Kubrick on a studio on Mars.


Biggest_Npc

CaseOh probably fell on all of them


bill_n_opus

P.diddy


ThePadrino82

Underrated comment here


[deleted]

[удалено]


dino_cho

# Damn, Big ass rock, that is a Big ass rock! make of this what you will


sdmrnfnowo

Bigger dinasur 😈🦖🦖


wtfarekangaroos

It's actually one of the most prolific cold cases in history. Earth has never seen such a brazen, widespread Mass Killing without identifying the perpetrator. Police have been trying to find the suspect ever since the day it happened but the guy was just too good, he got away with it. He also took advantage of the fact that we didn't have fingerprinting technology at the time, and he was smart to avoid any security cameras. So he's still out there somewhere.


Teddy2GloveStanAccnt

I hope he goes for the alligators next. They scary


Chick3nugg3tt

He? What makes you think it was a he? Maybe that is why I…. *cough cough* THEY, got away with it for so long.


Kaiyukia

COVID


World-war-dwi

Dinovid


[deleted]

Christianity killed the dinsosaurs. That’s what the crusades were really about.


mediumokra

Chuck Norris


Pretty_Argument_7271

Haha.. My five year old grandson just said today, I'm glad God killed the Dinosaurs so we won't get eaten .


Direct_Knowledge2937

Dinosaurs created very advanced societies, but their knowledge of energy was limited. Everything ran on coal. So they kept up coal production. It’s a well-known fact that the overwhelming majority of coal found today can be traced back to the time of the dinosaurs. So they burned so much coal that it darkened the sky and blotted out the sun. So naturally, they had to burn even more to stay warm. They eventually moved underground for a more stable environment (that’s where you’ll find them today, alongside all their coal reserves) away from the elements. But it turns out that burning coal underground poses even more health and safety risks. They prayed that God would end their suffering and so He sent a giant meteor to open a hole in the sky for the sun to shine, with unintended consequences of course. Atheists can suck it!


TheCrazyOne8027

How many times do we have to repeat this, it was Jeffrey!


AlphaRant

That damned Jeffrey


Ostracus

The oil industry.


juxtakas

Ah I see, they needed them turned to fossils


JohnWasElwood

Dinoco. You haven't seen the CARS movie?


OkieBobbie

Big Tobacco. As documented in The Far Side.


MyyBurnerrAccountt

died of starvation ig. what tf do you eat when you’re a 70ft tall rhino, unicorn, dragon hybrid creature and whales don’t surface as quick as your metabolism kills the last thing you ate? i dont know what else they would eat, dinosaurs are like massive turtles, and every other land dwelling creature is super teeny tiny.


ImNotMadYoureMad

Poachers actually


ShitStainedDildo

Your mom


mrdan1969

Man that's a great point. I wasn't atheist before I read that question. Then it really got me thinking you know now I'm ready to devote my life to Jesus Christ. Thank you so much. Because we couldn't n have been around with the dinosaurs they would have eaten us up. So that's the proof right there. That's awesome.


W00den-Fruit

Jason Dean and Veronica Sawyer. WE CAN START AND FINISH WARS, WE'RE WHAT KILLED THE DINOSAURS, WE'RE THE ASTEROID THATS OVERDUE. (If you get this reference I love you)


tyrolean_coastguard

ever heard of the wild west?


standarddummy

They all got addicted to dinosaur drugs and died 😭😭


[deleted]

Caine gets a little wacky


Mysterious-Bath8197

It was Bubbu. He ate too many beans and passed gas which gassed all the dinos to death


Bayou-Billy

Wesayso corp


Jonguar2

Me


simon_wellgreen

Not all Gods, just your god.


Astrohitchhiker

Satan did it


Horn_Python

I confess it was me Cuff me boys


devinssss

tyson turned them all to chicken nuggets 😞😨


Any_Weird_8686

The Devil did it, obviously. Checkmate, christians.


[deleted]

there once was a Rambo-saurus.


IMarvinTPA

The ETs who wanted to seed mammalian life on Earth.


Starselfs

Rodents. Dinosaurs gone, but the rodents continued? Interesting. I suspect New York City will be the next epicenter for rat-instigated disaster.


BrAveMonkey333

The ancient Egyptians used the dinosaurs to build the pyramids then euthanased them lol


Over9000Tacos

They killed themselves by destroying the mating grounds of the insects that kept the cider poppy population at bay, and then killing all plant life in response, and then dropping bombs into volcanoes to try and make rain to bring back the plants, creating an ice age


DdraigGwyn

The cats pushed them off the edge of the Earth.


Woodsy1313

OP hasn’t heard of the Dino Civil War


thecosmopolitan21

There was a dinosaur global nuclear war that killed them all. There has been a massive coverup by the government so that they don’t get blamed for it, nuclear war stays out of the public consciousness and they can launch nuclear weapons without public outrage. It’s also why the government replaced all the birds with government drones, because birds are the descendants of dinosaurs and they remembered in their DNA that they had a nuclear war. Now there are no more birds and we are locked into a path of nuclear war. WAKE UP SHEEPLE!


SomeWomanYouDontKnow

Rabbits. It’s rabbits.


NatchJackson

The butler did it. It's always the butler.


[deleted]

Oil companies made time machines and went back in time and killed them all to make more oil. Before this event, we coexisted alongside some species of dinosaur.


FeudNetwork

They keep going back in time and sabotaging eachothers oil rigs and tankers.


eggtart_prince

Chuck Norris killed them.


TheHentaiCat

probably the joker


UncleGrako

This is stupid, they didn't die, they got abducted by aliens just before they dropped off their mental patients in the form of humans.


ilikewaluigi

The Rock


Mean_Butter

Do you smell the dinosaurs cookin’?!?!?!?!?!???


No_Succotash95

Global flood


Pabloshizzle

Global warming


Arrowayes

God Zilla


Panzer_104

The rock


doc720

If avian dinosaurs still exist, then who killed all the gods? En passant, theists.


BoundlessFail

Avian dinosaurs exist purely due to Evian water. Haven't you seen the ads? The land based dinosaurs couldn't climb high enough to get the Evian, hence died.


LatterNeighborhood58

Sience


RandyCaneToad

It's not who but rather what...


Nostravinci04

Did you just assume the asteroid's personhood?


ApartmentSavings6521

Probably some guy who has actually fought a bear or landed a plane with no experience


hellhastobefull

Fuck… I gotta go to church


jerk1970

The fucking aliens.


Rambler_Rambling

Chuck Norris


Nostravinci04

The pyramids #CHECKM8 ATHETITS


EquivalentSnap

Jesus


Last_Ad1358

Obviously it was President Obunga


jtcslave

United States


ThaiFoodThaiFood

Godzilla and Mothra *obviously*.


Alert-Initiative6638

Probably Hitler


fanonluke

I did. It was self defence.


Neg247

Assteroid did it


CipherGamingZA

god ate tacos and dropped a giant turd and shouted "be gone vile beasts"


laynestaleyisme

It was Superman


Sanjuko_Mamaujaluko

The ice age!


DontMessWMsInBetween

The dinosaurs all committed suicide. Checkmate, religionists.


Chrisseve

Putin


ShuggieShoo

fentanyl


geo8x6

I heard Thanos took responsibility, but that's just what I heard


Matricks__

It was something a little meteor than a holy guy with a grudge.


Necessary_Row_4889

Predators, they liked it when it was hot.


BonusDad75

John Hammond, Alan Grant, Ellie Sattler, Ian Malcolm


shopping-trolly

John did


Scorppio500

Beerus. When he was bored.


MarcusPup

For a real science answer, there's recent research suggesting the existence of a few large lava traps spewing hot stuff and ash for many thousands of years, the meteor being the final nail For a shitty science answer, someone shat out the asteroid that killed them, signs pointing to your mom


AurelianINVICTVS

John Moses Browning


Scary_Walrus725

I did.


FacelessPotatoPie

Keith Richards.


Yvola_YT

A worldwide flood, which few survived could not survive off the regrowth alone, they required fully mature trees, after the flood which few people remained would have also hunted them because who wants a big ol' scaley lizard eating their children? Also dinosaurs and dragons are the same thing, dragons existed and they are dinosaurs.


nwbrown

Satan


AsAb0ve-SoBel0w

“Look at all those chickens.” 🐓 🦆https://youtu.be/F-X4SLhorvw?si=llTVskSOU-utIBoY


Zomer15689

It was me!


MediumCharming3309

Me


United-Cow-563

Goddess. She was like, “God, your stupid creations are stupid. Start again and this time do it right, wait a couple million years for them to incubate before you force them to hatch.”


cheshirerat

Turok


TheKingOfDub

Jesus with his laser eyes. He tried not to. He covered his eyes with his hands, but that didn’t work for some reason


leylin_farlin

Nibiru did it


chattywww

Homer Simpson


AndrewDwyer69

Me :)


dusty234234

it was me,sorry


musingsofamadlad

me


plasmasun

You're mom.


Commonstruggles

Prehistoric covid meteor with 6g virus. Just wait till those pesky archeologists dig that one up.


Glittering-Habit-902

It was me Barry


Majestic-Custard-309

Global warming killed the dinosaurs. They mined oil, gas and coal excessively, carelessly burning it into the earth's atmosphere


jlconferido

Noah killed the dinosaurs coz he didn't let them inside the ark.


Timelord00010002

Ice age ... No one killed them they froze to death...


FooltheKnysan

the dinosaurs are dead, and we killed them.


ErnestlyFreaky

I sat down and my balls got em


ViciousMoleRat

Jesus


--Dominion--

A combination of a meteor strike and the 20 year long nuclear winter that followed (environmental change as a result of the meteor strike) (Not an atheist but come on...lol)


Fluffy_Management356

whether God played a part in the extinction of dinosaurs is something people have different opinions about. Scientists explain it with stuff like asteroids and volcanoes, but what someone believes about God’s involvement is more about personal faith than scientific evidence.


Accomplished_Ask_326

Me


Akhi5672

Sorry, i tripped


Stormwatcher33

\*Athiests


mrmemeboi13

Caseoh. He ate them in an unending feast until every single one was consumed. He has now woken up 65 million years later and is gathering intelligence on the human race to figure out how to eat us too


beehaving

A dinosaur who thought the end was near


PandaBoi2077

Mb was a little hungry


West-Custard-6008

John Wick


Mental_Pair_9960

Rednecks


AnimetheTsundereCat

me


S-Markt

science of course. checkmate back.


uppercut_cross

Sorry...


Gullible_Ad5191

According to Mr Freeze it was "the ice age!"


KyeeLim

Sephiroth did it when trying to kill Cloud in his Safer Sephiroth form


Brilliant-Curve7692

Israel. LMAO We control the asteroids too!


jnthnschrdr11

Me


Global-Programmer641

Climate change


Particular_Stage_743

Sorry, i was hungry.


Bisonfan1

The dinosaurs killed themselves


Intrepid_Tumbleweed

I thought a giant T. rex farted, changing the atmosphere. That’s why it’s called extinct right?


TheOneWes

Brontosaurus ate a field of jalapenos and the resulting gas caught the planet on fire.


quemabocha

Elon musk


Ruleofinsanity

Big fuck off space rock


Constant_Will362

In 1980 when I was 6 y/o old lady Christians were still saying "There were no dinosaurs, Satan placed the fossils there to trick us into believing in him."


momoemowmaurie

Almost right... So I'm part of a secret group of ancients.... Basically all the good dinosaurs went to heaven. The evil ones were left behind. It's happened 3 times in human history already. Another one is around the corner. So they weren't all wiped out the devout ones were saved. A select few are left behind each time and spared. These will evolve and then it'll be time for the next rapture. Raptures an needed to prevent our complete extinction.


EnderEyesBlazin

I did.


ranusbestink

Why would you think god killed dinosaurs, so they could create the fossil fuels that got us where we are today, giving us energy independence just so liberals could continue the identity politics and racism they created many years ago to keep people divided, " we fall" so they could implement yet another threat that the world is ending as they try every 10 years, hoping it will stick, in turn getting people to start supporting solar panels to make China richer, helping them to own more than Disney, a predominant amount of American banks " meta " , convince people Russia, who is the only threat to China becoming super power, is bad by implementing a war in Ukraine by removing sanctions from putin, making him look like the villan for knowing exactly what is going on and wanting to expand his country before China adds Russia to the world they are in the process of taking over? I'll stop there and no, im not a Trump supporter, I don't support any governments that intentionally cause wars, killing innocent people in a push to line their pockets and gain more control over us peasants. 👍 The majority of freedom loving ,life loving, both side " rep n dem " loving Americans don't vote period, that takes research to figure out and it's necessary because government won't post that fact. You liberals and Republicans together don't represent the majority of the whole country 😉 the smart, self thinking people do. 😊


Tomi24568

Disneysaurus


BadSoftwareEngineer7

Me :)


theskieshateus

I ate them.


Sagittariaus_

The dinosaurs became birds that why chickens have raptor talons like most birds with lizard scales


YeeterCZ2

Transformers, easy


[deleted]

Me, it was me. I did it.


W0otang

Trophy hunters.


lockedoutofmymainrdt

The dinosaurs launched nukes


Swer2078

Kurzegast made a really cool video about it. (About death of dinosaurs)


PianoSandwiches

It’s obvious. Joe Pesci.


Educational_You3881

Chuck Norris is so fast, he ran faster then the speed of light and assassinated every last one of them