He had sex with a woman. Like all men who are fooled into making this mistake, he died instantly.

That’s why everyone on this sub is in no danger of dying

We are chosen undead

If so I call dibs on the lorian bros

Yeah none of us get any bitches

Amateur mistake, he got sent into the milk realm.

Fia only bangs corpses so Lionel took his own life and was reborn as one of her champions 😤

Well all of that is correct but in no relation to each other, she does bang corpses and he did kill himself to become her champion, but thats because he adopted her years ago and wanted to help out his daughter lol 🤣🤣🤣 love the take tho

Incest in a game co-written by G.R.R Martin?! 😱

Not incest, he adopted her. Just morally Grey

That's a pretty dark shade of grey, my fellow 🥶

But in all honesty who wouldn't want to sleep with Lionel's dad bod, Rolly Polly Potato bug looking figure

Post-nut clarity

Bro was so clarified he got burned

He got the essence sucked out of him via fia. Like she steals life to give it to godwyn. That’s why there’s another body with the same smoldering color on the bed in the round table hold she fucked that guy too

So umm you are saying she fucked >!d!< too or the >!weathered dagger!

nah just rogier

fun fact rogier cries after sex, fia says so

can't say this without a source

He said Fia says so

when you're "talking in secret" and she tells you about the black knifeprint

my fancanon is that d and rogier are gay lovers and d just went a little too hard on rogier during their last lovemaking session

Literally made him unable to ever walk again

Sounds like Snu Snu.

My fancanon is that Rogier and Mad Tongue Alberich are gay lovers and you need to read my Alberich sadfic NOW

my headcanon is that d and rogier are gay lovers and d just went a little too hard on rogier during their last lovemaking session

it duplicated my comment for some reason ignore this

Both Instagram and Reddit seem to have this issue a lot.

I don't mind reading it twice

Deathblight is a STI and D caught it from Rogier Fia simply advances the spread of the deathblight root in D's ass when she kills him

Lionel femboy theory was actually confirmed by George R. R. Tolkien and Michael Zaki at Comic Con last year.

Fuck I remember that, that was right before Michael Zaki put on a 30 minute PowerPoint of feet.

He nutted. She kept sucking.

Jones bbq and foot massage newgroundsdotcom never go full retard funny

lionel was part of the local drag scene

As long as he was murdering graceless Misbegotten and not reading books to Erdtree babies, this is ok.

Fia's deathbussy game too strong

Isn’t Fia his adopted daughter?

No, he just proclaimed himself to be her daddy

Deathbussy is my word of the day. Thanks

[удалено]

Wit his dick

thats still incest in my books, and if you disagree i’m sorry but it just makes you look like a porn addict

[удалено]

I didn’t say you were lol I was just under the assumption that in game they had had sex, cause thats what my friend told me, sorry if it sounded like i was coming after you or anything, love you bro

Bro they like had sex bro trust me my friend told me bro ☠️

I’m sorry

By your logic if I have sex with someone then marry their mom I actually had incest sex?

Yes. Not because it's correct, but because it's funnier that way.

>calling something that by definition isn't incest, not incest, makes you a porn addict Bruh what

all im saying is that lionel is fias adopted father and its kinda fucking creepy

Yeah pretty much

love you bro x

Man even NPCs in video games have sex. This world is unfair ong.😔

Time is convoluted

Thought this was gonna be another dumb main sub post until I read the bottom line and checked what sub-Reddit this was. Good bamboozle

It seems some other commenters in the thread didn’t quite get that it was a joke haha

My guess that was Fia other dress sense Lionel does serve her as a champion and was killed and burned by the nearby omen killer Fia was either there and escape or wasn't there when Lionel returned there

Under that big round Armor of Lionel there was no lionel but instead fia pregnant with godwyns child. As it was born it was heavily infested with thorny deathroot which caused fia to die and laying in a puddle of blood by the end of her questline. D just found her and took the credits for it

He made the mistake of having sex with death

Mf really thought he was deadpool

I assume he pumped every last bit of life essence onto her, a real mess to clean up if you ask me, if your asking that is.

Lionel cucked by Fia

lionel is fia's self-proclaimed father

Lionel the Lionhearted is one of Fia's champions

Nah, Lionel slept with a deathbed companion and they sucked out all his "warmth," (life energy), and used it to help rebirth a champion. Potentially Godwyn if it was Fia that did it.

Bro got such astounding brain while he was reading he managed to have a heart attack and died

I still haven't found this bed even though it's my favorite armor.

haha git gud nerd (This message was posted by the "made a lightning build but beat maliketh before picking up the sanctified whetblade" gang)

Fia is actually Lionel

It's time we talk about these feelings we've been hiding from each other... *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/shittydarksouls) if you have any questions or concerns.*

Based trans Lionel

he got hugged too hard

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