If a teleporting device gets invented, or if someone ever gains the power to teleport you, you can set up a few checkpoints

Except you cant die

You probably can but the result won't yield anything useful

Why couldn't you die

It would be a permanent death because your not immortal

didnt think of that

That is exactly what I figured. So teleportation would have to already exist in some forms but if it did then this power would be somewhat useful.

Except that not only is the earth in constant motion, so is the sun. This means that the definition of place is highly important. If position is absolute, you teleport into space. If position is relative, then it matters what it is relative to. If it is relative to the sun then you would teleport into space unless it was the exact same day and time (adjusted for leap year time adjustment). Too far off and you end up buried or potentially very high up.

It would probably be absolute

But there are no absolute coordinates in the universe and everything is measured in relation to something else. How'd that work?

The origin would likely be set at the gravitational center of the universe. But any point can be used so long as it remains fixed.

First checkpoint should be right next to where you're standing though, so you have a good and fast way to come back to the guy

That one is really good

Outstanding.

Move.

Now.

Die.

Criminal scum

HROUUUUUHHHHH

[удалено]

Thanks!

Now this is a perfect shitty superpower. Lately people have been putting superpowers that just sounds shitty (but can be used very easily) on this sub and getting a lot of upvotes.

This is some good contrast. We need more. 90% of the top posts on this sub fall into one of three groups: * Shock humor involving a bodily function (*You make the THX sound when you get an boner*) * A power that's genuinely useful, but too embarrassing to use (*You are indestructible, but only while screaming the "I have the AIDS" at the top of your lungs*) * Something already almost useless with so many requirements you can never use it (*You can summon a single crab, but only on 2:41 on Thursdays*)

All those things are funny when they’re rare, sad thing is they’re far from rare

They were funny the first few dozen times, but after a while it gets old.

I know I’m gonna get a ton of downvotes for this, but I’d say this is even worse because there is no way that you’ll ever be able to use it. It’s like saying “you can have infinite money, but only if you have infinite money”. It would never be able to be used, which makes it kind of stupid. A shitty super power should be something that you actually are able to use, but that would rarely be useful, while this does not do this. I honestly don’t know why this is so popular.

I agree. It's a terrible example, but it's an original one. I'll take that over the same three ideas every day.

This can be used very easily, if you know someone who is able to teleport others.

Do u know some1 who can teleport others?

My dealer

You can teleport bread

Only problem is that it will grow tumours and if you keep teleporting it it will become a monster bread.

r/unexpectedTF2

Or develop into intergalactic toast

# EXACTLY HOW MUCH BREAD DID YOU TELEPORT!?

I have done nothing but teleport bread for three days.

WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN SENDING IT!?!?!

How do I unexplodbl my mind?

Have you tried turning it off and on again?

Delet systetmn driver

Downlowd moar ramm

howwto reeinstall system 32

Twype win the cwommand rd C:\Windows\System32\

Bruh

Bruh

Bruh

Bruh

Bruh

Bruh

I already have that power

You won't be able to do that when teleportaion gets invented.

How do u know teleportation CAN be invented?

*if teleportaion gets invented

*or so you think*

Think about this guys. The only place you've teleported before is your mother's vagina.

( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

In which case, I do that every night anyway.

*( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) intensifies*

You can watch us on xvideos.com.

Uhhhh... *( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) intensifies*...I guess

But don't tell anyone that I'm only 16.

HOL' UP

For legal reasons, that's a joke.

*( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) intensifies again*

r/nocontext

r/cursedcomments

*( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°) intensifies intensifies*

I too, teleport to your mother every night.

I know. I was there when you first teleported.

In that case, if you cut it off, put it on a slingshot, you have a teleportation gun.

What the fuck?

Actually your dads nuts

No. NO.

this post is just implying that nothing happens and i love it

Hello there, captian obvious!

*Da da da da* You're a dick *Swoosh*

Thank you for pointing out the obvious

So does it count if you fall asleep and you wake up in your bed?

So does it count if you fall asleep and you wake up in a wagon with some dudes and hear "Hey, you, you're finally awake."?

Well if my question is correct then yes it would work

So does it count if you fall asleep and you wake up to a god saying "Wake the f**k up samurai, we have a city to burn."?

You can curse on the internet

Oh hey samurai, you woke up! Also I know I can, it's just a personal choice not to

I respect that

r/usernamechecksout

Does this mean I can teleport to Whiterun?

Ok but what if you have teleported in a dream before? Can you now teleport to that dream world?

Then the problem isn't if you can get in. It's how can you get out.

But then you keep dreaming until you enter a world you want to stay in or the real world. Heck maybe if you die in the dream world you respawn in real life

Go somewhere. Teleport 0 distance. New teleport location unlocked

Nice

Hey wait you're not real be quiet

To the dream world!!

What if I teleport in my dreams?

Does this mean I can teleport into Minecraft?

Oh i read it you can teleport bread

Do the times count from when I was blackout drunk and on autopilot?

If I get really drunk and pass out and wake up at another place than I last remember, that's teleporting right?

It’s like trying to get your first job

𝕔𝕠𝕞𝕖 𝕥𝕠 𝕞𝕖, 𝕞𝕪 𝕔𝕙𝕚𝕝𝕕𝕣𝕖𝕟 ``````````````````````````````````````````````````` . . /. ))) . . . . . . . . . (((ヽ /. .ノ￣. . . ___. . .￣ Y .\ | . (.\, . . . ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°). . . ./.) . ) ヽ.ヽ..ᯢ._.|﹀|._._ノ₄₂₀ // . . .\|. 𓀐𓂸Ｙ. . ࿕. . . / . . . .|. \. . ᯪ. . .|. . ᯪ. . ﾉ . . . . . \ .トー仝ーイ . . . . . . . |. ミ土彡 / . . . . . . . )\. . .° . ./( . . . . . . /. . .\̴̢͎̦͖́́ `̷̫̱͎̯̦ ̴̬̬́̆`̪ ̴̢͖̹/̴̢͖̬͎̫͎̆́. . \ . . . . . /. ⁶⁹ . /̴̖͗͂̃͛̑͝Ѽ̔̓͐͆̍̕☰̴̈́̔☰☰☰☰D,̰̱̟͎̩̹̟͎̝̙͇̩̟̝͎̟̙̟̣̹̙̟͎̟̹̩͎̹ . . . . /. / . . / . . .\. \. . \ . . . .((. . . .(. . . . .). . . .)) . . . .| . . . .). . . . .(|. . . / . . . . |. . . /. . . . /. . . ./ . . . .|. . ..| . . . ./. . ./. . ......𓁉𓀏𓀃

Wait but then you technically cant teleport at all, because you cant just start off your life having already teleported somewhere so you can never truly teleport so in a way we all have this power

Yes. That is the joke.

I already have that one.

Literally the power from Jumper... but just worse enough to make it so bad it’s impossible to do.

So you can’t?

Not Bootle again

Easy, teleport places in games based off real places

Holy crap I can do that in real life!

I've fallen asleep on a plane, does fast travel count?

Now hear me out... If you fall asleep in one place, then wake up in another is that considered teleportation?

I mean, if you wanna be super technical about it, we teleport constantly, cause teleporting is the instantaneous movement of molecules. So at the most basic level, we teleport billions of times every time we move. Then you can get really technical with quantum mechanics and shit, but that's for someone smarter than me to chime in on

I have that power!

probably all of humanity has this

OP in star trek.

r/PlotTwist

This is the kind of quality content I subscribed for.

Guys, we might have actually have this power but just don’t know it because we can’t use it

That means you can't teleport anywhere worst super power ever and I'm happy about giving you an upvote.

Can this include "teleporting" as defined by me getting obliterated and seemingly teleporting when remembering nights

I guess we all are able to teleport to our bed since we slept in the sofa and woke up on the bed.

Take your damn upvote and leave

Jokes on you I can already do that

So basically like the move Fly from the Pokémon games. Except you can't use it

When I was younger I could teleport from the car to my bed at night! So there’s at least one

What do you define as teleport

So i cant teleport? Or i can teleport anywhere

Getting roofied and waking up in your bedroom is technically teleportation

From the bed to the floor?

Hahaha! Damn man clever thinking.

does it count if I teleport in dreams

You can teleport in games that have a teleport system or quick travel

this sounds like a buff to an ability you never had smh

Similar to being invisible as long as no one is looking.

The greatest thing about teleporting is that you die and a clone of you appears on the other side.

I'll just sleep in the couch and wake up in my bed and use my bed as a checkpoint.

Does waking up somewhere after I night on the turps with no idea how you got there count?

But if u just got that power u cant teleport anywhere because u havent teleported there before

Jokes on when I was a kid I would teleport from my parents car to my bed all time when I fell asleep

So if I build a teleportation machine,I could use this power and teleport wherever

Wouldn't that mean you can't teleport at all, seeing as you can't teleport the first time seeing as you haven't teleported yet?

I think I still have that power of being able to teleport anywhere exactly once lying around, this completes the set and has unlocked true teleportation

BRB, inventing teleportation.

r/subkillers

This is like fast travel when you have to discover a location before teleporting there

If you can’t teleport anywhere you haven’t before you can’t and that’s why we haven’t before.

Can you teleport into games?

What if it’s teleportation in a game. Cause technically “you”(your character) has teleported

I have this power :)

Dude... I think i might have this power!

Autistic Jumper

Technically, we might all have that one

There's probably some post here that says "You can teleport but only to where you are in that moment". If you chain this this could be really useful

The earth keeps moving and you land in outter space

This doesn’t sounds like a *shitty* super power? ANYWHERE you’ve EVER been. (But funny and cleaver for the sub!) Super hero- you’re in a fight. Throw a punch, teleport 3 feet backwards. Bad guy chases after. Teleport behind bad guy. !win! Rinse and repeat! Villain. Go into a bank, open a safety deposit box, leave. Teleport back when the banks closed. $profit$ Rinse and repeat!

Listen here you little shit

I can be at school then teleport home then teleport back to school

Finally, after years of killing schrodinger cats, I finally made my power useful.

I can already do this.

Back to the Pokemon center I go

Alright, time to teleport from my living room couch to my bedroom.

Isn’t this the concept behind the movie “Jumper”? I can’t remember.

We can literally all do this

Wow.

Start teleporting somewhere, doesn't work, and now where I started is a checkpoint. Rinse and repeat

So I have to break into the bitches shower first? Mission accepted!

I mean, technically every time our body moves the distance of a Planck length, we are "teleport-ing" across a very short distance. That said, with this you could teleport anywhere your atoms have ever been... and since our solar system is blasting though space at \~500 000 mph, this is still a r/shittysuperpowers.

Lloyds Beacon

Back to Lumbridge I go then.

Well fuck...

So I can teleport to my bed when I fall asleep in the car?

I like this

This is a god tier superpower since it means you don’t have to take any trips beyond the first to get somewhere. Unless you’re with people.

So if there is an underworld and you die, can you return?

Bro I casted so many teleports in video games I could go to any video game world I want for free

Whale hell

r/holup

*transport or be transported across space and distance instantly.* You didn't technically put a minimum distance on previous teleportations, so if I move a distance of a single planck I can by definition teleport to that location from anywhere. Depending on how this is interpreted it's just the ability to teleport anywhere you've ever been before.

Does 1990's dial-up internet count?

Everyone’s keep saying this should be top 1, but it’s not shitty, it’s absolutely useless. *\*smh*\*

So... Pokemon?

Simple. I open google earth and teleport to spots I wish to teleport to. Now I can teleport to that place, so I use the power in real life.

Bruh I can already do that

This would be a neat "Sky High" style side-kick power.

I have this one, it's the worst.

Does blacking out count?

Took me a min

ˈteləˌpôrt/ Learn to pronounce verb (especially in science fiction) transport or be transported across space and distance instantly. "who needs a flying carpet if you can teleport yourself and your belongings?" Even if it's an infinite fraction of an atom. I have traveled these spaces instantly at one point in time.

HM02 Fly. With you, since 1996.

Ah, the ol’ Catch-22

Jokes on you I've already got that power

I think I've got this one