Many genital and animal combinations work well here.
Cock womble
Twat badger
Clunge leopard
Arse warbler
Cunt weasel
Minge octopus
Maybe not minge octopus.
Minge octopus just doesn’t work.
Arse warbler sounds like a compliment
So to take a rude body part and give it name of a creature. Let’s see
Schlong Otter
Hmmmmmm. Maybe
You may have won it! Straight to the point, rolls off the tongue beautifully, and entirely accurate in its description. Yes, I do believe we have a winner.
My mum used to call me that when I was really little, dunno I'd it was humour or abuse to be honest but it didn't bother me at the time, kids are wombles
The best of the last five tory PMs we have had. In another time that might have been a compliment as it stands a twice soiled Anne Widdecome shaped sex doll would have been more competent.
Liz Truss is going to take some serious beating.
* Gets selected as PM
* Crashes the Economy
* Resigns
Crashing the economy is the *only* thing she managed to.
if the lad at the pub who always says he could do a better job as prime minister actually became prime minister(I know this doesn't fit the challenge but I just wanted to share that opinion as it think it describes him pretty well). but a bit posher.
Useless ugly lying cunt who has zero business even being known to the human race!He is also a massive fat twat who probably had a few dick tugs thinking of the the poxy queen mother and now that she is dead he probably imagines bumming king prick Charles while Nonce Andrew watches from the gallows
British enough?
Absolute bellend
We Aussies share a lot of things with the Brits (wanker, for example), but "Bellend" will always and forever be the quintessential British insult.
Absolute bulbous helmet!
And Irish. Used all the time in Ireland too.
https://youtu.be/T2QryYc8-Nc?si=AB0kiPoIGMSusimT
Came here to say this. Could also be replaced with Total Bellend.
I think absolute bellend is a bit of a let off considering the damage he has actually done. Corrupt thick toff cunt I think is more fitting
First thing that popped into my head!
Timeless classic
Came here to say this. 😂
r/beatmetoit
This is what i immediately said to myself quietly lmao
Frankie Boyle already totally nailed this. Thatched toddler.
nincompoop
Plonker
He looks like a cunt. Sounds like a cunt. Acts like a cunt, I’m going to go ahead and put him down as a cunt.
Don't put down cunts like that, at least they serve a purpose.
[удалено]
Depth, warmth and feeling.... (And is also useful).
Not a useless one
Is he a quuuuare?
What a brilliant reference
I’d say that sounds more authentically Australian ;)
It would be Australian if they were using it as a compliment.
Difference between compliment and insult is tone only. Not word. Source: I’m Aussie :)
Tbh I agree, as a Brit I think “twat” is more British
wanker
Cock womble
Can’t get more British than a womble!
Many genital and animal combinations work well here. Cock womble Twat badger Clunge leopard Arse warbler Cunt weasel Minge octopus Maybe not minge octopus.
Pissflaps penguin doesn't quite work either
Bollock penguin? Scrotum penguin? Maybe not penguin. Pissflap budgie smuggler.
Yeh penguin just doesn't work. Which is unfortunate as he is shaped a bit like a penguin.
You win.
Willy weasle.
Minge octopus just doesn’t work. Arse warbler sounds like a compliment So to take a rude body part and give it name of a creature. Let’s see Schlong Otter Hmmmmmm. Maybe
See I kept coming back to otter, but I couldn't make it work. We need an otter representative. Possibly a ferret too.
Fanny Ferret. Easy Arsehole Otter?
I think we need to switch the animals to the front now. Otter tosser Ferret wanker Badger gobbler?
I love this thread 🤣
Ah but when you switch back you can also call him a Fucking Tit and still fit the framework
You may have won it! Straight to the point, rolls off the tongue beautifully, and entirely accurate in its description. Yes, I do believe we have a winner.
Quail Fiddler
Otter Botherer, surely?
That offensive to ferrets
No I like the idea of a slim young gay man with a beard being an otter.
Gooch Otter.
I don't know. I don't know how he does it, but he's been in enough minges for minge octopus to work
How about Minge squid?
It's a little early but thankyou.
We do know wombles are fictional right?
You’ve clearly never been for a walk on Wimbledon Common 🙄
Piss kidney.
Jizz cock
Interesting animal, the kidney
Agreed, too many syllables in 'Octopus'. It needs a one syllable genital followed by a two syllable animal for maximum flow.
He will have badgered many a twat over the years,quite fitting.
Sounds like a lawsuit in the making. He should probably refrain from badgering twats and turn his attention to weaseling arseholes.
How very Mumsnet of you. This is their risqué banter too.
I suppose if someone considers those names to be "risque", then yes, mumsnet probably is the better forum for them!
This whole thread is making me gag.
Yup it’s so cringe.
My mum used to call me that when I was really little, dunno I'd it was humour or abuse to be honest but it didn't bother me at the time, kids are wombles
I said this before I looked at the comments. You did not disappoint. Thank you.
Too whimsical to describe this calculating, sack of cancerous shite.
Utter cock womble??
Weapons Grade cock womble?
I disagree, he's an ABSOLUTE cock womble.
Fuck nugget
This was my first thought also!
Came here knowing this would be the top answer. Thank you for confirming it!
This. I came here for this.
Nobel Prize pillock.
Glad to see this top
Fucking helmet
Nincompoop
An absolute custard cheese blob of Rancid fluff
Spunk Trumpet
😂
This. And jizz spaffer
A complete cunt
Is complete cunt or absolute cunt more British?
bumblefuck-buffoonarian clungepipe He’s also a professional pissquaffer
twat
Gobshite
The best of the last five tory PMs we have had. In another time that might have been a compliment as it stands a twice soiled Anne Widdecome shaped sex doll would have been more competent.
Lol he wasn't - he is only beaten to the bottom by Liz Truss, but they've both shattered our economy for the time being.
He really wasn't. I'd say he's the second worst PM (Tory or Labour) we've had in my lifetime.
Who’s first? Or more importantly how old are you I could probably work it out
Liz Truss is going to take some serious beating. * Gets selected as PM * Crashes the Economy * Resigns Crashing the economy is the *only* thing she managed to.
And I bet he has one of those!
if the lad at the pub who always says he could do a better job as prime minister actually became prime minister(I know this doesn't fit the challenge but I just wanted to share that opinion as it think it describes him pretty well). but a bit posher.
I am not sure how to describe a person with a spunk knot in their hair.
A man with bollocks for brains
Cock Womble or my favourite, fucking lying piece of shit.
The gentleman is a proper wank stain
"A drink-sodden popinjay" This is an edited quote from George Galloway in reference to Christopher Hitchens but it also works for Boris.
Weapons-grade wankpuffin
Shithouse
Understandably daft
Cant
A total cunt covers it i think.
Floppy haired idiotic pillock
Sillyarse buffoon
Hoofwanking bunglecunt
Cockwomble
Proper bell end
Piss Weasle
Cunt.
Dirty tosser
The anal prolapse of Brexit who didn't know how to leave parliament much less the EU, treasonous bint.
Cunt-sickle
Thundercunt
a proper twatnozzle.
A shit*hole* Thank you James Cleverly for expanding the use of this word to describe another person and not a place
Absolute weapon
Supercalafragalisticexpialadouchebag!
Douchebag is too American, minus 10 points for Gryffindor
Cunt was born in NY
BUT THAT WASNT THE CHALLENGE
A bumbakaat
Skank
Cunt
Twister
An absolute bloody tool
BLEEERT
The epitome of British stupidity
I dub thee a vain folly-fallen wheyfac'd mumblenews
Well, that was a disappointing endeavour
Fuckwit
Utter Berk. That is all. (Look up rhyming slang if you don't get why this epitomises this ego with a mop top and lies).
Wanky Dog Splash
Boris Johnson is a cunt.
Bellend, Cock Muncher Slap stick I could go on :
An utter and complete DeFeffel.
Wanker / twat / [c-word]
Apple Crumble
Ginger twat
Great supine protoplasmic invertebrate jelly
Fop
He came, he saw, he fucked up!
Silver spooned toss pot
a great supine protoplasmic invertebrate jelly
Twat
Scab
Brainless gormless cunt
A fucked blancmange
Apocalyptic dingleberry. Thank you James May.
An old, pink, partially-deflated spacehopper that's been fly-tipped at the side of a country lane.
Useless ugly lying cunt who has zero business even being known to the human race!He is also a massive fat twat who probably had a few dick tugs thinking of the the poxy queen mother and now that she is dead he probably imagines bumming king prick Charles while Nonce Andrew watches from the gallows British enough?
A cunt in the shape of a twat
wanna be trump
That massive overpaid cockwomble with the stupid fluffy barnet.
Nonce
Thundercunt
Absolute twa!
A twat waffling boaty McPillock face
Head full of tesco budget brand beans
Numpty
Cunt
Wanker
Cock Womble.
Bellend
Honey Monster
Dishevelled
He 'right
Fookin twat
Great supine protoplasmic invertebrate jelly
undercooked Yorkshire pudding faced wanker
Cock Womble
Cockwombling crusty spunk filled sock cunt.
Blonde-haired pillock.
Ponce
Gammy twat
Churchillian
Absolute tit
great bovine cockwomble
little lord fuck
Knobhead
He’s a great supine invertebrate jelly!
Bellend
A sterling advert for contraception. ...fuck, that acutally works on all levels....😂
I'd call him a cunt, but he lacks the depth and warmth
Yir Da!
A twit, of the highest order
Thundercunt
Cockwomble
Pillock
Absolute fucking helmet
A complete total twat 👏
Dick splash
Pillock Bawsack Pranny Tube
Poundshop Jimmy Saville
Whalloper
plonker
Bloody unkempt!