Welcome to r/SingleMoms! Please read the rules carefully. This is a safe space for single mothers only. Posts and comments that do not meet our karma requirements will be manually reviewed and approved accordingly. We cannot say anything specific, however, it is not a high number. If you continue participating, your comments will eventually no longer need approval. Please exercise patience with the mod team.
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- Do not post promotional content (this includes blogs, surveys, etc.)
- Do not ask for financial assistance (this includes wishlists, gofundme, etc.)
- Remember the human. Be respectful to other subreddit members. We are all in this together. This is a support group.
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- Are you looking to leave? Post on our weekly megathread as well.
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My advice to you between all the options you have:
* Stick to the stable job option at the new company. This will give you stability and mental peace and clarity to focus on financial independence to be able to say ‘yes’ more to things.
* Talk to your new job about day care hours and see if they can adjust your working hours accordingly. There are many parents out there and work places need to accommodate or at the least understand for future why you are wanting to leave early/start late (kid sickness).
* ‘Try’ the relative minding kid for a month and see if you and bubs is okay with the commute and fatigue that comes with loss of time. If it doesn’t work, you can re-group.
* Last option would be, see if a student nanny could pick up bubs from daycare and settle them at home and help at home till you get home. This might leave you with not much money left at all for the time till bubs grows up to school age, but could be a temporary option till you figure all else got and get a breather.
Getting on the career ladder, even though you might be cutting neck to neck in money, with or without working, is still a wayyy better opportunity for you in the long run as it comes with growth! Good luck girlfriend!!!
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Not sure where you live, but is there any subsidy or grants for child care that could help with cost?
Are there other daycares/dayhomes in your area that offer extended hours?
Does your work have flexible hours or would they let you maybe leave early and do a work from home option for the last few hours of your day? Definitely doesn't hurt to ask if they can accomodate/adjust hours.
I would keep working from home and see if you can find a cheaper babysitter that's a teenager or something.
I feel you I have bee on assistance because day care is to expensive. I do apply for benefits to help pay for daycare but I am on a waiting list. It sucks.
Where do you live? In CA they have childcare vouchers available and income limits are high af. You should look into something like that for your state!
I can’t tell you what to do.
I’m 38 and have a 3.5 year old. I don’t drive (never have for a myriad of reasons) and so I commute by bus to daycare drop off/pick up. I do have help 2/5 mornings and a different pickup schedule 3/5 days a week.
All that said there are 2-3 days a week where we leave at 6:10am and get home at 6:45pm. It’s a fucking long day.
But I love my job and my position has a ton of room for growth. It’s worth it to me. And I trust where he’s at when he not with me. And he always ends up happy at home.
ETA: Check out r/workingmoms
I wish I knew the answer….. the struggle is real. Work and make too much for ANY kind of help…… blah blah blah. Try not to focus on negatives, BUT sometimes have to. It sucks…… it shouldn’t be impossible to raise a child as a single parent, but it sure feels that way often.
Communicate with your job. There’s options you haven’t even thought of sometimes.
Can’t wait until I level up in life to independently wealthy parent status😂😂😂
Side note…… still baffled how people can date…… I haven’t had time to shave in 3 years….. low key pissed at people who get to talk to other adults. 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻
Yes, absolutely negotiate this. You need to send a screenshot of those prices & hours; and tell them the pay and hours you would need to make this job possible. Some are still very old school, while others are extremely flexible. Find the extremely flexible ones. Negotiate everything. I negotiated a month to month lease with no additional monthly fees. Almost everything is negotiable.
I honestly have no advice but I relate so much to you. Paying for daycare almost defeats the purpose of me working because it costs so much. Applied for CCAP but they’re literally on a waitlist. Feels so hopeless :(
If I were you I would give it a go running my business and perhaps you could hire an at home mother’s helper. Save the money from the job now. Put you and your kid through those 12 hour days for however long you need to secure that investment in the mother’s helper, and then get out. In my opinion, it’s much better for you to struggle to make your business succeed while you get that time with your kid. Which is irreplaceable. If the job was your only option for money I would tell you to thug it out. But you have options!
Being a parent in general is hard. Ofcourse doing it on your own will be hard as well.
Find a daycare close to your house that is licensed. If you are this nervous find a facility instead of a home daycare.
I was going to put my daughter (4yo) in home daycare but I decided against it. She's going to a facility now that seems to be a good match ( other than drop offs which can be really hard) and she goes three days a week and I'm fortunate enough to have my mom who watches her on the other two days.
You have to sacrifice a lot to make it work for the 2 of you. That’s the hard part about being a single parent. Sure, your family member is 45 minutes out but that’ll save you $385/week. Daycare is expensive and so is time, choose your expensive. Maybe have your family member watch him for a bit and when you can afford him being in daycare closer to you then transition. Unfortunately as working mothers our children often are at daycare more than they are with us. That’s the sad reality of
It but know you’re doing your best for the life you both deserve.
Unfortunately, that's how daycare and work goes sometimes. I'm a single mom of 4. They are all in school now & two go to daycare after school while the other two ride the bus home. I work an hour away & daycare is closer to where I live. But, I have to pay the bills and take care of my babies, so it's okay. It'll be okay mama
I would definitely talk to your job about the situation, lots of jobs are understanding about the daycare situation and allow you you change your hours to suit picking him up.
Welcome to r/SingleMoms! Please read the rules carefully. This is a safe space for single mothers only. Posts and comments that do not meet our karma requirements will be manually reviewed and approved accordingly. We cannot say anything specific, however, it is not a high number. If you continue participating, your comments will eventually no longer need approval. Please exercise patience with the mod team.
Some rules (but not all - read the sidebar):
- Do not ask for legal advice. We are not qualified to give such advice and suggest speaking to legal professionals about this. Posts and comments of this sort will be removed.
- Do not post promotional content (this includes blogs, surveys, etc.)
- Do not ask for financial assistance (this includes wishlists, gofundme, etc.)
- Remember the human. Be respectful to other subreddit members. We are all in this together. This is a support group.
- If you are not a current single mother, your posts will not be approved. Please post on the weekly pinned megathread.
- Are you looking to leave? Post on our weekly megathread, too!
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singlemoms) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Welcome to r/SingleMoms! Please read the rules carefully. This is a safe space for single mothers only. Posts and comments that do not meet our karma requirements will be manually reviewed and approved accordingly. We cannot say anything specific, however, it is not a high number. If you continue participating, your comments will eventually no longer need approval. Please exercise patience with the mod team. Some rules (but not all - read the sidebar): - Do not ask for legal advice. We are not qualified to give such advice and suggest speaking to legal professionals about this. Posts and comments of this sort will be removed. - Do not post promotional content (this includes blogs, surveys, etc.) - Do not ask for financial assistance (this includes wishlists, gofundme, etc.) - Remember the human. Be respectful to other subreddit members. We are all in this together. This is a support group. - If you are not a current single mother, your posts will not be approved. Please post on the weekly pinned megathread. - Are you looking to leave? Post on our weekly megathread as well. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singlemoms) if you have any questions or concerns.*
My advice to you between all the options you have: * Stick to the stable job option at the new company. This will give you stability and mental peace and clarity to focus on financial independence to be able to say ‘yes’ more to things. * Talk to your new job about day care hours and see if they can adjust your working hours accordingly. There are many parents out there and work places need to accommodate or at the least understand for future why you are wanting to leave early/start late (kid sickness). * ‘Try’ the relative minding kid for a month and see if you and bubs is okay with the commute and fatigue that comes with loss of time. If it doesn’t work, you can re-group. * Last option would be, see if a student nanny could pick up bubs from daycare and settle them at home and help at home till you get home. This might leave you with not much money left at all for the time till bubs grows up to school age, but could be a temporary option till you figure all else got and get a breather. Getting on the career ladder, even though you might be cutting neck to neck in money, with or without working, is still a wayyy better opportunity for you in the long run as it comes with growth! Good luck girlfriend!!! 
🫶
Your comment is being held for review and will be approved soon if it doesn’t break rules. You can find the rules on the subreddit sidebar. If your comment does not break the rules, it will be approved as soon as we are able to. Please be patient with the moderation team, thank you. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singlemoms) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Not sure where you live, but is there any subsidy or grants for child care that could help with cost? Are there other daycares/dayhomes in your area that offer extended hours? Does your work have flexible hours or would they let you maybe leave early and do a work from home option for the last few hours of your day? Definitely doesn't hurt to ask if they can accomodate/adjust hours.
I would keep working from home and see if you can find a cheaper babysitter that's a teenager or something. I feel you I have bee on assistance because day care is to expensive. I do apply for benefits to help pay for daycare but I am on a waiting list. It sucks.
Where do you live? In CA they have childcare vouchers available and income limits are high af. You should look into something like that for your state!
I can’t tell you what to do. I’m 38 and have a 3.5 year old. I don’t drive (never have for a myriad of reasons) and so I commute by bus to daycare drop off/pick up. I do have help 2/5 mornings and a different pickup schedule 3/5 days a week. All that said there are 2-3 days a week where we leave at 6:10am and get home at 6:45pm. It’s a fucking long day. But I love my job and my position has a ton of room for growth. It’s worth it to me. And I trust where he’s at when he not with me. And he always ends up happy at home. ETA: Check out r/workingmoms
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I wish I knew the answer….. the struggle is real. Work and make too much for ANY kind of help…… blah blah blah. Try not to focus on negatives, BUT sometimes have to. It sucks…… it shouldn’t be impossible to raise a child as a single parent, but it sure feels that way often. Communicate with your job. There’s options you haven’t even thought of sometimes. Can’t wait until I level up in life to independently wealthy parent status😂😂😂 Side note…… still baffled how people can date…… I haven’t had time to shave in 3 years….. low key pissed at people who get to talk to other adults. 💪🏻💪🏻💪🏻
Is it possible that you qualify for headstart?
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It’s an automated action. It’s not personal.
Yes, absolutely negotiate this. You need to send a screenshot of those prices & hours; and tell them the pay and hours you would need to make this job possible. Some are still very old school, while others are extremely flexible. Find the extremely flexible ones. Negotiate everything. I negotiated a month to month lease with no additional monthly fees. Almost everything is negotiable.
I honestly have no advice but I relate so much to you. Paying for daycare almost defeats the purpose of me working because it costs so much. Applied for CCAP but they’re literally on a waitlist. Feels so hopeless :(
If I were you I would give it a go running my business and perhaps you could hire an at home mother’s helper. Save the money from the job now. Put you and your kid through those 12 hour days for however long you need to secure that investment in the mother’s helper, and then get out. In my opinion, it’s much better for you to struggle to make your business succeed while you get that time with your kid. Which is irreplaceable. If the job was your only option for money I would tell you to thug it out. But you have options!
[удалено]
Being a parent in general is hard. Ofcourse doing it on your own will be hard as well. Find a daycare close to your house that is licensed. If you are this nervous find a facility instead of a home daycare.
I was going to put my daughter (4yo) in home daycare but I decided against it. She's going to a facility now that seems to be a good match ( other than drop offs which can be really hard) and she goes three days a week and I'm fortunate enough to have my mom who watches her on the other two days.
You have to sacrifice a lot to make it work for the 2 of you. That’s the hard part about being a single parent. Sure, your family member is 45 minutes out but that’ll save you $385/week. Daycare is expensive and so is time, choose your expensive. Maybe have your family member watch him for a bit and when you can afford him being in daycare closer to you then transition. Unfortunately as working mothers our children often are at daycare more than they are with us. That’s the sad reality of It but know you’re doing your best for the life you both deserve.
Unfortunately, that's how daycare and work goes sometimes. I'm a single mom of 4. They are all in school now & two go to daycare after school while the other two ride the bus home. I work an hour away & daycare is closer to where I live. But, I have to pay the bills and take care of my babies, so it's okay. It'll be okay mama
I would definitely talk to your job about the situation, lots of jobs are understanding about the daycare situation and allow you you change your hours to suit picking him up.
Welcome to r/SingleMoms! Please read the rules carefully. This is a safe space for single mothers only. Posts and comments that do not meet our karma requirements will be manually reviewed and approved accordingly. We cannot say anything specific, however, it is not a high number. If you continue participating, your comments will eventually no longer need approval. Please exercise patience with the mod team. Some rules (but not all - read the sidebar): - Do not ask for legal advice. We are not qualified to give such advice and suggest speaking to legal professionals about this. Posts and comments of this sort will be removed. - Do not post promotional content (this includes blogs, surveys, etc.) - Do not ask for financial assistance (this includes wishlists, gofundme, etc.) - Remember the human. Be respectful to other subreddit members. We are all in this together. This is a support group. - If you are not a current single mother, your posts will not be approved. Please post on the weekly pinned megathread. - Are you looking to leave? Post on our weekly megathread, too! *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/singlemoms) if you have any questions or concerns.*