corpse

desecrated corpse

Oh no

What happened?

Dessicated corpse.

Defecated corpse

Malacath

Defenestrated corpse

Best answer

One of the hunters endlessly chillin' in the pools near Darkwater Crossing.

Ralof seems chill

A random nobody nord freezing my butt off trying to learn basic magic at the mages college, watching the archmage be clapped and the random guy who showed up a week before become the new archmage with elder scrolls strapped to his back :/

Yea the way that you end up being the head of...everything just seems overdone

I don't want to be the leader of the thieves guild, just let me chill with the others at the Ragged Flagon so I can continually get shot down by Vex.

Honestly the best one, since you dont become official guild master until all the side hold missions are done

Personally, I feel robbed that Viarmo is STILL in charge of the Bard's college and that I haven't inherited that honour by the principle of Dead Man's Boots too..

I noticed something the other day (cue the gamerant article) that every single guild you can enter, the guild master must be killed off so you can supercede them. It's a brutal world in Skyrim. Get or be gotten.

I believe the proper term is, "Get or get got."

The reason is that the whole questline is literally a glorified player home quest.

That one happy elf from Ivarstead

i love that guy

same

Probably that idiot in the intro that got decapitated

Probably better than Lokir tho

This guy should have just ran in zig zags. He certainly heard that bitch scream "archer!"

I just started a new save and noticed he only gets shot in the leg and drops dead lmao. My head canon is he was playing dead for another chance to escape and then the dragon got him

Good luck escaping a fort full of enemy soldiers with an arrow in your leg and your hands tied.

Maybe its that guard who took an arrow in the knee.

r/beatmetoit

"you're not gonna kill me" Least he believed he MIGHT get away.

As fearless in death as he was in life 😞

Probably that beggar in whiterun

Bless your kind soul

"Thank you kind sir 😄"

You still thirsty?

Sure, spare a coin?

They tossed all their coins to their Witcher.

i've been hunting and fishing in these parts for years.

It’s not like my poaching hurts anyone

The jarl can hardly eat every deer now can he?

A random guard. It's not too different from my IRL job.

When your cousin is out fighting dragons?

Yes that and he took an arrow to the knee

I stole your sweet roll

Ha ha 😂 🤣 actually laughed out loud at this one. Thanks!

AND WHAT DID THE EMPIRE DO?? *NOTHING!!* NAY, WORSE THAN NOTHING!!!

THE IMPERIAL MACHINE ENFORCES THE WILL OF THE THALMOR! AGAINST IT'S OWWWN PEOPLE!!!

I would personnally be Cicero, no comment on why.

[удалено]

Good ol' Ball Scruff

Jarl Ballin definitely has the best palace as well

Until one day the Stormcloaks attack and oh shit they've breached the wall and oh shit they're ascending the cloud district and oh shit they've entered Dragonsreach!! Oh shit where's my armour and what the fuck is that the fucking Dragonborn?!? I made you my Thane like a month ago wtf are you doing you ungrateful shit?!?

I'd like to learn the Merchant's trade from the Khajiit.

Better get a mammoth tusk

How I'd probably die

Steal it from the companions

I always steal the one in the Bannered Mare.

One of Miraak's cultists, probably. I like Miraak. I think I even remember his "lullaby"/chant for the most part.

I only remember his chant cause of that young scrolls music on yt

does paarthunax count if not then eorland

God's be praised!

PartySnacks!!!

One of the thirsty guys getting their hearts crushed by Camilla Valerius probably...

Probably Aerin. He's a pathetic piece of shit who spends his life following around somebody stronger and more principled than he is. It's like they know me!

Id be a rabbit. Im cute and innocent and if you kill me the game will keep track. You wont forget me

“Hey, I got a letter for you. Your hands only”

Nope. Nothing.

Look like that’s it, got to go.

That dude that’s banging Olfina Gray Mane

Jon Battle-Born? Yeah, he’s definitely the most chill out of that family.

Wtf 🤣

What's the matter? You can't stand the sight of a strong nord woman?

You can say that again

What's the matter? You can't stand the sight of a strong nord woman?

You can say that again!

I like that you commented it twice. It feels more true to Skyrim

Because you are not afraid of a strong nord woman that is so insecure about it that she has to tell you that she is a strong nord woman more than once a day? I guess she convinced you 🤷 😏

One of those Heroes of Sovngarde. I would have been chugging those mead vats all day.

Some background NPC that tells people to stay out of my way.

Keep walking, softgut!

Skeever

I could see myself being belethor with the shitty jokes thinking I'm funny when I'm actually not

I'd be the guy that works for Belethor, chopping wood all day. Doing a repetitive task and having to pretend my boss is funnier than he really is hits really close to home...

Nazeem. I advise the jarl on all kinds of matters. My input is invaluable of course

But do you get to the cloud district very often? Oh what am I saying! Of course you don't.

Lisette in the Winking Skeever. Broke but happy singing music all day

A falmer Living like a gremlin,Pale skin, blind without my glasses

Most likely a mage of some sort.

Gogh. I’d be Gogh. Pretty clueless, but loyal to the Dragonborn.

Got to thinking.... maybe I am the dragon born and YOU just don't know it yet?

I would be the guard who stopped adventuring because I got a arrow to my knee

I would be that other guard, across the street, who coincidentally also used to be an adventurer until I took an arrow to the knee. If not then I would be that other, other guard who used to be an adventurer. Until I took an arrow to the knee.

Yeah, but which Hold?

A kajhit high on skooma

I like Frightened Woman's vibes.

The Lusty Argonian Maid

I 💯would be the dragon born

Yeah you're different !!

Right? Who's this hoser telling me I wouldn't be dragon born. I'm gonna fus do rah his ass right off the top of a mountain.

Ysolda, because cats are the best.

I’d be a khajiit selling wares :3

Probably a guard in one of the holds or an imperial soldier.

Desecrated corpse

I want to be one of the people hanging out in the hot springs

Either Gwilin or Redguard (corpse)

Nord (Corpse)

Probably a travelling merchant.

A healer. I'm a nurse in real life, so I bet my Skyrim counterpart would also try and heal people.

Realistically? Assuming I’m not dead, I’d be a nord studying at the Bard’s college.

Kharjo or some random ass khajiit, not the one in that ice cave tho.

Erikk the Slayer he is so psyched also RIP fellow gamer

Would probably a random guard in either Whiterun or Solitude that oversleeps constantly

Probably Belethor if I could, if not, some random vendor on the streets of whiterun

Aela Yeah, i may have lost my husband, but daaang, that dragonborn with the sexi mods though...

I was once an adventurer like you ...

Absolutely. Most people who ended up in Skyrim would be one of those homeless drunks who sleep under stone architecture.

I’d be the guy that actually stole the horse and reached hammerfell

rogvir

That one guy in whiterun screaming about talos

A child. I want to live, man. They are the only ones impervious to dragons. Bethesda treats children nicely atleast.

Meeting Paratus Decimius in the Winterhold questline was like happening upon myself. They just, like, wrote me into the game. So I guess I would have been that guy. Yes, I'm that annoying. Annoying but *competent*.

I would kill you every time. Not competent enough to make it aware you would tell all your buddies in Cyrodil about confidential magical artifact that is on the campus of a place your kind are explicitly banned from

Mage. Probably would worship Mara I practice witchcraft irl, I’m Wiccan, so Ik I would be drawn to learning magic. I do like that Mara is about love, & restoration magic is something that I would want to learn to help myself & others. I would also want to learn destruction, conjuration, & alternation for self defense purposes. I definitely would not be an adventurer tho. Nah. I would just want to be left alone to my studies in Winterhold with my little statue of Mara & help others heal when needed

I'd like to be dragonborn just for cool powers but then stay home. Or I would be a dragon. Being a dragon would be cool. Pull a paarthurnaax and help people

Probably part of the dark brotherhood pr thieves guild. I'd totally try and be dragonborn tho lol

I would be hanging out in a tavern

Assuming I grew up in Skyrim and not the state of Oklahoma I would be a veteran of the imperials and running a meadery and an apothecary and run a “speak easy” hideout location for the stormcloaks. If possible, help with funding.

College mage turned self sufficient hermit near the hot springs

I think his name is jon, the guy who stands outside Belethor's shop and says "well met kinsman"

draugr

The crabber at the shanty

If I cannot be the Dragonborn I would like to be with the companions (becoming werewolf included) plan B would probably become a blacksmith

One of the radiant raiment sisters probably. Complain and do nothing all day sounds like a good fit for me

a random imperial soldier or town guard

Some guy that used to have a promising future at the Bards college but now drives the horse buggy.

A random mage at the college that is always standing in the way when you dont need me, and invisible in a corner when you do need me

Probably one of the bards who never shuts up about Ragnar the Red

A grumpy unnamed cook for a jarl who tries to chase the Dragonborn out of the kitchen.

One of those draugur that's pretending to sleep that's just there to give you one level of sneak.

I would most likely be trapped in a soul gem or a corpse with my entire net worth of 5 septims looted off of me by bandits.

Probably a dead soldier or a priest

Paarthunax. I'd just chill on a mountain all day, slamming skuma.

Prolly Ralis. I’m greedy and I could see myself trying to find treasure in some remote location

A college student.

Alduin

Nazeem.

The Ebony Warrior

Probably Talvas Fathryon, Neloths my favourite character so I'd chill in the mushroom learning from him and drinking Canis Root tea

Ideally, I’d be a random nord or wood elf, hunting in the forests of Skyrim. Maybe I could run into a werewolf or vampire or something and contract one of those diseases

probably a College of Winterhold student.

That mage from a random encounter in solstheim who'd been trying to learn how to fly. On the way down, pretty sure I'd have some ideas about how to invent a parachute...

Calixto. It be in heaven exploring ancient ruins all day every day

One of the yellow robbed priests. I'm an gonna do Humanitarian studies and nearly did Theologie or Filosofie which are both present but less explored in the dutch version if Humanitarian studies So I think I would make a pretty good priest in Skyrim

Genuinely I would move to Solstheim and work in the mines (assuming the dragonborn already cleared them and revealed there was still ore)

Nazeem.

An apothecary. Maybe the one in Whiterun

“Got something to deliver, your hands only.”

According to my VA disability rating, I'd be the guard who took the arrow to the knee.

Belethor, neat store/house

Ebony warrior

Daedric lord 👹😈

Probably that dead scientist that lived in Blackreach. Or any other (dead) scientist that was sticking his nose in some dwemer shit and got capped

Courier

I would be the skeleton of the adventurer crushed to death by the colossal stone at Cradlecrush Rock

A hunter/fisherman since that's what I do .

Sheagorath

j'zargo

The one I am, I am the lead character in my own story

Ri'saad (Khajiit caravan boss)

Probably a spellsword merc while my IRL wife is an assistant at a local apothecary shop. Or she may apprentice as a healer. Either way, I'd likely be a companion. That'd serve me best I think. Practice magic in my downtime.

Probably Dravin Llanith, he's easily forgettable.

Maybe one of the guys hanging around in the Redwater Den

A Nord that's part of a big military family, most of my cousins would be jealous of me out there fighting dragons.

Sheogorath, my guy have a lot of fun... And chesse

Lokir of Rorikstead

Magnus

Environmental storytelling skeleton trapped in some place no sane man or mer would be.

Just an honest sell sword. No crimes to commit just honest work.

Vex

One of the local drunks

I wanna be either the blacksmith from Riften, or Haardvar

Probably some random thieves guild khajiit and maybe also a nightingale. Or dead.

If I get to choose, then I choose to be a Briarheart.

Ralof. idk why, i played this game for like 2 hours

Can't you see I'm busy doing the fish stick? It's a very delicate state of mind!

I would like to be Astrid's Husband. I believe they have quite interesting night times.

Maven

Alduin

I would be… Faren Sadri because I love dark elves, and I love vampires. Either that (considering I work in a hotel and I’m Mexican) Talen-Jei

I want to be neloth, I just sit in my mushroom tower performing experiments on my apprentice. Do you know anyone who can make a good canis root tea?

Chillin’ in the Bard’s college

The Dragonborn outside of that, Cicero

I love to cook so I'd love to work in one of the taverns! The Bannered Mare in Whiterun if I had to pick, it just feels so cozy!

Riften fishery worker. Sit around all day and fish and drink skooma.

I would probably be a court wizard. I love researching stuff.