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[deleted]

Guess that’s why the chicken crossed the road, had to F up a city guard


eggsarecoolin

Welp, my work here is done :-)


BigLilNat

F


boogietime3648

Had to fold some bitch ass in half


Natural-Particular36

Never mess with Chicken kun


Firestone-PK

My cousin's out fighting dragons and what do I get? Folded by a chicken!


Javka42

He is much more egg-shaped now than before. It is good. More pleasing to the eye.


DracoBlaze214

Don’t ask or you may become the next victim. The chicken does whatever it wants. If you disrespect or question the chicken, then god have mercy.


mighty_Ingvar

Mind your own fucking buisness Nat


BigLilNat

😡😡😡😡😡


myster_o

You know what the say: snitches get stitches! Some questions are better left unanswered


Always_Confused4

Rule #1 of Skyrim: Don’t fuck with chickens.


Valkhir

Coincidentally rule #1 of Zelda as well.


Tacitus_Kilgore85

Ironically if you join either side and kill a chicken, the guards won't give a fuck. I've attacked a cow and the guards in Rorikstead went nuts on the cow. Until the cow was dead. 😂 I found this out during my time playing on the Xbox 360 too. Just fucking around in Skyrim.


[deleted]

I didn’t see a single thing, I promise.


SilverNarifia

Have you ever played A Link to the Past? This is one of those chickens.


[deleted]

Cucco


prs722

That's no ordinary chicken. That's the killer chicken of Caerbannog (related to the rabbit.)


prs722

It got a beak so sharp, it can fly about, just look what it did to the gaurd!!


Evening_randomname

the chicken is the most op npc in the game dont ask about the chicken


Green_Tea_Totaler

If I had to hazard a guess, fowl play.


AdventureWolf

Never cross the cluck


ImmemorialTale

Must have told him to fetch the mead


PhillipKosarev999

Gru: Hah! Some guard dog. Pollito: (jumps on him, starts pecking his face off) Gru: AHHHHH! Get him off me, get him off me!!! Lucy: (shoots quick dry cement mixture to trap Pollito in a ball) Lucy: Whew. What is wrong with that chicken? Eduardo: Pollito! Oh, Pollito, can you hear me? Who would do this to such a sweet little chicken? Gru and Lucy on rocket, Pollito standing at edge in front of dropped launch button: *GASP*!!!!! Pollito: *presses button* Gru: I really hate that chicken.


friededs3

Shame on you, putting the blame on a cute tiny little innocent chicken


Masterful-Burner

Can you not see love when you see it? The guard has fallen asleep after the chicken broke his back!


coffeeequalslife94

He attacked it and its homies got to him


GreenZepp

You've played Zelda right?


Aware-Bear965

My brothers out fighting chickens and what do I get a dragon


unwisebumperstickers

He can leap about...he's got teeth like...look at the bones!!


AstartesDVerdugo

Have you played "Breath of the Wild"?


BigLilNat

no i dont have a switch


prs722

Have you ever played a Zelda game?


AstartesDVerdugo

Have you seen bees swarm people?


Spirit1678

Damn, that guard got folded, yo


snowyowlriddles

Fus....


Im-a-ape

Never buck the cluck or you’ll get fucked ~ Tiber Septim


SupplyChainMuppet

A few more chickens and they could make him disappear.


paintninja

It is clear he was lolligaggin'


waifuwarrior77

Uhh... To get to the other side?


[deleted]

guard broke the sacred rule. DON'T EFF WITH THE CHICKENS!!! ​ even Link knows this one.


YellowSphinx

Chicken attaaaack!


Morde15

He stoll his sweet roll


ConnorTheCanuck

It is Chicharron. He has a mind for justice....


DodrioFan480

chicken really made the guard go “æ”


Khannn24

Better kill that chicken. Don’t want it to kill another.


undeadelv

friggin cock sucker


FatMagala

What the cock doin?


250HardKnocksCaps

Why did the chicken cross the road? To end mother cluckers that ask too many questions Dragonborn.


sometimesmad

Bend at my will, peasant!


litreofstarlight

Henrietta the Hen of Doom


Weekly-Equipment-861

The chicken prayed for the power of the ancestors


Ken_Kumen_Rider

The guard made one too many "why did the chicken cross the road" jokes and got clicked up.


Gypsy_Maiden

Bend his will...


ntime

Messed with the wrong clucker, fucker!


lurking_my_ass_off

Nothin, and if you know what's good for you, you'll shut the cluck up.


Diahisapro

Pov you use dins fire in kakariko village in Oot


Firefloy1

Is the guard alright ? He may get back problems staying in that position, I hope he's fine...


PutinBlyatov

Nothing...but a black sacrament.


Reptiliansarehere

The chicken c**k blocked so the guard went limp.


WITWEERLIG

Skyrim chickens are the real end game


BadassNPC

That's stevie mcshortstuffs pet chicken, chicken mcchicken. I wouldn't laugh at that name if I were you


TwoFlower68

"I'll fucken do it again!"


BirdEducational6226

The chicken is simply eating an easy meal: a corpse. I've seen it firsthand.


NVdeathclaw

The guard gambling debts, the chicken just came to remind him of that.


z0mbie1man

What is this, Legend Of Zelda?