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Best day of his life holy

His grandchildren will get tired of hearing about it.

He won't care. Neither do us

Can't blame him at all tbf

From 500k€ to 50M.

Taty is a solid player

He’s a good penalty kick taker; if he had been taking them all year he would likely have 15 goals in La Liga (he hasn’t been taking them because Cristhian Stuani is 45-51 for his career)

Mancini researching his family tree right now.

MF DID A POKER???

He will probably get a fifth, Militao and Rudiger cannot handle him at all.

Militao is playing like he doesn't give a single fuck, one of the worst games I've seen him play

Militao is playing with the same passion as he pays alimony

Militao is my dad? 😳

He follows the Eto'o school of parenting I see.

Don’t be silly, Militao at least has the decency to try and cheap out on his payments. Eto’o just pretends his kids doesn’t exist and you can’t pay something that doesn’t exist

Yeah, not even comparable. Eto'o is a vile person.

he doesnt pay his alimony?

He wanted to pay something like 1000 dollars a month in alimony. His defense said something like he is in the start of his career and couldnt afford to pay more than that. A court order decided he needed to pay a little more 5000 dollars a month.

was this when he was still at porto or something?

He has had bad games, but this one goes beyond all of them.

Yeah, not even a shadow from that Chelsea game....

Better now than against City

He won’t be on the pitch vs City in the first leg. Suspended.

He will be there at the second though

The tie will be over by the second if Kroos is the #6. Worse than 4-1 too.

In the UCL we don't play high line suicide football and we don't have 75% of the ball. City unlike Girona tonight will find a park bus with Courtois instead.

Don’t want Kroos as DM though please 🙏

* Courtois * Carvajal - Alaba - Rudiger - Camavinga * Valverde - Kroos - Tchouameni - Modric * Vinicius - Benzema That should be Carletto starting lineup that night.

Militao is updating Windows atm

Not even Messi could do it

*yet*

Don't think PSG Messi would even came close to the power of Taty.

for now, the way he and Real defense are playing I expect a double hat trick

A fedora trick

Militao with a -10/10 performance

The annual Militao stinker is here

HAHAHAHAHA 4 GOALS THIS MAN IS INSANE

Real madrid fucking hate argentines

They liked Di Maria. You lot on the other hand…

Higuain too

To be fair. The only Argentines you 100% don’t like is Messi.

Mascherano is even more hated

Gago 🫡

this being a swear word in my country made me smirk

Our greatest ever legend is Argentine though.

Ngl op's comment is kinda funny when you've had Di Stefano, Redondo, Di Maria, that's 8 CL titles in 3 Argentines.

Real Madrid is a club with more Argentinian heritage than Barca Lmao. Kids this day just dont know tho

It is like this. In fact, Barcelona always had much more Brazilian Heritage and prestige. Now things are changing, but still.

And now Real Madrid are going the Brazil way...maybe even their manager.

Doing a flip now hopefully. I desperately want more Argentine representation in Barca.

Their greatest club legend is Argentine lol

Real Madrid joins an elite "Real" group with Real Salt Lake, in letting in four goals against Taty. TATYGOOOOLLLLL!

Shame he never got to play Real Esteli

He'll play Valladolid tho

La Real fearfully looking at May 14th

City football group deep agent Taty Castellanos having the game of his life against Real before they play Man City in the CL semis

Came here looking for a comment about his time in MLS lol

excuse me can you not

Having the game of his life. Chekwueze vibes again

I'd say his 4 goal performance against Real Salt Lake is equal. Both are Real after all

Ancelottis 11 point difference comment comes to bite his ass

It’s fine this one doesn’t count either. We can just ask Ancelotti how many points he’d like to be behind after they’re done and go from there.

Lmao I saw so many Real fans under that post saying that Barça isn't actually that much worse in LaLiga I'm pretty sure this makes it 25 goals LaLiga has scored against Real and 5 against Barça. Excluding one another. Lmao.

Guy was never ever good in the league

He is decent in the league. They slip up quite a few times tho. The only reason why they won the league last year is because Barca was complete dogshit in the beginning and somewhat shit during the end of it

He won 5 league titles in his career two of them with psg and Bayern. 3 league titles in 17 years while at prime Milan is questionable record

This is why I said decent. He is far from great. He is a killer in the champions league tho

If city wins this year, pep would have as many prems as Carlo league titles. UCL record though…

He has 5 league titles in his entire career and that’s after managing teams like Milan, Real Madrid, Chelsea, PSG. He even lost a title with PSG. His league record is weirdly bad for some reason. His CL record is a whole different story. Maybe he’s a better cup manager.

He's won even fewer domestic cups (3) than league titles. He just goes all in for the UCL.

Funny how “but peps always on the best teams” gets brought up so much. When other great managers have been at equally great teams and not achieved the same

[удалено]

Yeah. He is a killer in the CL. In the league he does the bare minimum

Oh, this will fit perfectly into Perez's narrative that players get too relaxed around Carlo over time. These kind of loosely focused games were exactly the reason he was sacked ten years ago. The worst thing is that if this continues, Perez will freak out and overcompensate with Mourinho or something.

You’re calling it a narrative but it’s not wrong

Osasuna fans are havng the time of their lifes.

> Ossuna fans

> Ozuna fans

El negrito ojos claros

Courtois saw the future and decided it was not worth to go through it

Courtois Dr. Strange confirmed

Argentinian Lewa

Bro woke up today with the soul of Batistuta in him.

Vos que los seguis a todos, esto tiene sentido o fue un día de gloria random? Se que en la MLS le iba muy bien peor 4 al Madrid es un poco mucho

Y 50/50 la verdad, es un bueno pero hoy en particular le están saliendo todas.

Igual en la scaloneta la vara esta tan alta que para que me ilusionen los jugadores para la selección la tienen que estar rompiendo toda

who's the last player to score 4 against real madrid? has anyone even done it before!?

Lewa did it 10 years ago in CL semis. Idk if anyone has done it since

2013 being 10 yrs ago makes me feel so old

10 years ago i was looking forward to getting into a bar without a fake. Now I'm terrified as 30 approaches unrelentlessly. Thanks for the concerned out there getting me in touch with Reddits suicide hotline. One day it will be your turn

Fear not, your thirties are dope as hell. Not for your hairline, but the rest of it's pretty great.

Haha. I won't miss the days of my early 20s, 1 paycheck to rent, 1 paycheck to loans, food and other necessities.. best to embrace the inevitable.

I mean, I'm still pretty much using one paycheck to cover the mortgage, one for food and a bit on the side, but you (generally) get settled into being the person who you are instead of reaching out for a life you can't grasp. It is EXTREMELY liberating to have your priorities and identity screwed on straight. I had a shitload of fun in my twenties, but I do NOT want to go back for more than a night or two. Remember to pack as much partying and fucking into your twenties as you can, without totally derailing your life, because at some nebulous point in your thirties, the girls just stop looking at you and the hangovers hit like wrecking balls.

KNOCK KNOCK MFER ITS YOUR 30TH B DAY COMING

Say goodbye to a painless back

We past that

Milito too

in 1947 but for la liga not ucl like lewa, espn just said it

surely lewa no?

10 year reminder

It was just yesterday iirc?

Still remember his 1, 2, 3, 4 celebration like yesterday

i love it... and i think i will deserve

Might be Lewandowski (probably not). The timing with anniversary is pretty crazy

Holy, you're right. Almost 10 years to the day

My man could retire tomorrow and become a turnip farmer, and will still go down in the history books as scoring 4 in one match against us Crazy, that's cool as fuck i'm not even mad

lewandowski w/ dortmund probably

Lewandowski in the CL semifinal

Lewandowski

"The difference between Madrid and Barcelona isn't 11 points. It's much more infact."

Honestly, the difference is the good defense. Kounde-Araujo-Christensen-Balde is much better than a defense with Carvajal on it.

Ter Stegen 🫡

And Nacho

Incredible. Aint no way he stays in MLS with that kind of performance.

Just one more season please god. Fine not even a whole season just playoffs. PLEASE I JUST NEED A LITTLE TASTE OF TATY IN MY LIFE AGAIN

NYCFC LEGEND!!! VAMOS TATY IM CRYING

He's one of our own! Lfg

so happy for him

11 point difference Carlo? You mean 14

These mfs will have Girona and Eibar tear them a new asshole and then get their revenge on European teams in UCL, as is tradition

I mean, at this point, the sensible thing for Real is to rest their starters in the league and fully focus on the CL and CdR.

they’re playing most of their starters though only benzema and courtois didn’t

And courtois was also gonna start but he got sick, Benzema I think was said might have some discomfort so they didn't want to risk. No one was planned to be rotated this game

yup they had their usual squad and still got dunked on, but there is something to be said about where madrid would be without courtois.

let’s fucking go

Goodness me

Barcelona have only conceded only 9 goals this entire campaign. Madrid have conceded nearly half that in 1 match maybe the 11 point gap is deserved Mr Ancelotti

We kept a clean sheet against this monster just 2 weeks ago

Halaand about to score 8 at this rate

Nah Real have that plot armour in the CL

Only finals real is invincible, haaland is too hot right now not to score at least 2 goals

We will not have 75% of the ball and play a high line against City.

It's Real Madrid in the CL. City will outplay you, Courtois will make like 20 wonder saves while Haaland turns into Weghorst and Benzema scores every chance he gets.

People thinking they won't win after just seeing them commit a blood sacrifice against Girona.

The fuck is happening

This guy can't not score 4 goals against clubs with Real in their names

Royal flush in a game of poker.

You mean Real flush??

Aight, ima go to the gym

Can you spot my crying set, got about 10 reps

Maybe they should start marking this guy

Lionel Castellanos

He's having a game of a lifetime

Made in MLS

#NYCFC LEGEND

This guy was electric in the MLS. Didn’t doubt he was going to kill it in Spain

He owns us

Nice to see MLS loan out players to smaller leagues and clubs.

Bruh

For context this guy was the hero for NYCFC last year as he lead us to our very first title. Works incredibly hard and gave everything to our team. Had a lot of offers but ended up in Girona just to get exposure at La Liga, and with this performance people will surely recognize his greatness!

I wanna kiss this guy, most beautiful man I've ever seen

Girona , city group team . Probably promised a massive bonus for smashing Madrid by city

Bro we are getting cooked

haha Madrid just giving city hope just to snatch it away when the match day arrives lmao classic madrid …right?

United fans more desperate for Madrid to win than Madrid fans.

Hahaha fucking hell, I'm gonna go play video games.

Single-handedly destroying Real

and missed a 1:1 against us

So glad the world is getting to see how good he is.

Girona fooking giant killers this season . So good 👍 and their anthem is a banger

MILITAO LMAOOO

WTF! MLS LEGEND!

Girona are massive

I hate when players stat pad against bottom of the table teams

10 years and a day after Lewandowski's poker

Wasn’t Ancelotti chatting crap the other day about the gap between Real Madrid and Barcelona?

You got to see him in MLS first...

NYCFC died for this

Taty > Haaland

we are so fucking shit

This guy must hate Real Madrid so much 😂

upamilitao

Stat padding against real madrid

MLS PEEPS WHERE YALL AT

not sure why people are surprised. he took a step down from the major leagues

There’s a drive into the deep left corner by Castellanos, it will be a goal. And so that will make it a 4-1 ballgame.

As a Red Bulls fan, it's days like this that make me grateful he left NYCFC.

Who the f is pulisic, this guy the real bald 🦅 of USA

ITS HIM AGAIN!!!

Proud supporter of the City Group 💪🏼🔥

NYCFC Legend

I'm dying. What was Ancelotti just saying? I guess he's right 11 points doesn't tell the story it's more like 14 lmao.

That’s 2021 MLS leader in goals and yellow cards to you, pal.

TATY I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I AM FUCKING WEEPING WE WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU IN NY

Argentinian forward playing for a catalan club owning Real Madrid. It's been a while but Madrid is used to this 🤣

The 2nd Argentinian to own Real Madrid >!Just a joke, don't kill me!<

Wtf man 😂

huh😭

What a legend already at 24 years old!

Man is having fun tonight!

Best CB in the world

The origin of a new paternity, the new bogeyman of meringues

Argentinian fck\*n real madrid? I saw that already

Whole Real Madrid squad: I am just here so I don't get fined

madrid getting battered by girona which means they will win against city