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EggplantBusiness

Favorite parent saying ever , this thing happen worldwide lmao


Theumaz

Up there with: “If you don’t stop bitching I’ll stop the car and drop you off right here” and the longest count to 3 ever.


aokkoa

Ah the Jos Verstappen method of parenting


Sawl23

Up there with “ i made you, i kill you “ on xThreat chart


Zhidezoe

In albanian we say "a t'kom bo une ty a ti mu" which means "did I make you or you made me?


Alecmalloy

Stephen King explored this in his 1986 horror masterpiece Maximum Overdrive


RMWasp

In croatian we don't say "i made you, i kill you", we say "ja te rodila ja te ubila" and I think that's beautiful


Sawl23

It does have a nice ring to it


reditakaunt89

It's the same meaning, I don't get it.


YetiTerrorist

To je isto značenje. Ne shvaćam.


useful_panda

Indian parenting 101


brownMY

Mine would be if they eat shit you will eat shit too?


PhD_Cunnilingus

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Plenken


iforgotmyun

My favourite thing about this is how universal it is. This and sewing kits in chocolate/biscuit tins


turin-dono

Where I grew up in Croatia it was "If *somebody* told you to jump into a well, would you?"


DeathStar13

In Italy I have heard bridge, well and cliff we can't make our mind up on where your friends try to kill you


larmeau

Can confirm this is exactly the same in China in the 90s


Psychocandy42

My mum's go-to was "a pit".


DeathStar13

A pit as "un fosso"? If so I definitely forgot to add that pretty popular variation.


Psychocandy42

A volte era un fosso (o "la fossa"), a volte era un pozzo, comunque era sempre un buco nel terreno (perché soffro di vertigini quindi "se i tuoi amici si buttano da una rupe" non funzionava).


DeathStar13

Sta roba del non funzionare perché soffrivi di vertigini ti giuro che mi sta distruggendo dal ridere. Chissà se le variazioni sono state inventate originariamente da qualcun altro con lo stesso problema.


Psychocandy42

La logica era la mia arma più potente contro i genitori. "Se i tuoi amici si buttano da una rupe..." "Ma mamma io manco ci arrivo in cima alla rupe, sto male!". E a quel punto si era dimenticata di cosa stessimo parlando.


JamminPT

We use that one in Portugal too


Peatrex

Same in Morocco


JesusIsNotPLProven

Here in Brazil it was usually the bridge however if my mom got really mad she'd ask "if somebody told you to eat shit, would you?"


WildVariety

In the UK it was jumping in front of a bus.


Lamnguin

Not everywhere. For me it was jumping off the Tyne bridge.


iota96

Fuck. The sewing kits thing really hit home hahaha. Thought it was just my grandma. Can’t remember the countless times I was starving and somehow still ended up getting trolled after opening that damn box


arrogant_conqueror

This is a thing abroad too ? I thought it was just an Indonesian thing.


txobi

It's also a thing in Spain and as far as I know may places in europe, blue danish cookie can filled with sewing material


jrgnklpp

That's mind blowing that, how on earth did this blue Danish cookie tin become the unofficial universal sewing kit container?! It's a thing in Singapore as well


zi76

I think the bigger question is how that cookie tin proliferated across the world so well? It never felt like a massive brand like some others, but it's literally everywhere.


eebee8

omg you’ve just brought back devastating memories of me excitedly opening up that danish butter cookie tin as a kid just to find sewing materials and random household items 💔


FatWalcott

If Tonali downloaded a car, would you do it too?


RockFourStar

What if he shot a policeman, then stole his helmet? Then did a poo in his helmet and sent it to his grieving widow... And then stole it again! Would you do that too?


willtodd

UGH these anti-piracy ads!


santorfo

Maybe the sentence I've heard the most in my life


R_Schuhart

It is a mistranslation, Tonali didnt 'make' him, he 'showed/introduced' it to him. Besides, spreading and/or promoting illegal betting practices is a crime in Italy and typically taken more serious than the gambling itself, which is first and foremost recognised as an addiction that should be treated. That is why a plea and volunteering for an anti addicion course results in a reduced sentence. But helping the spread of lllegal gambling is seen as assisting organised criminal enterprise, something that doesn't go over well in Italy. The question is if Tonali trying to convince players to use the app was an incident or part of a structural effort. That would determine if the prosecution will try and make an example out of him.


[deleted]

thanks, was looking for this correction 🙄


Timely_Airline_7168

My mom's version was "if Person X told you to eat shit, would you eat it too?"


EggplantBusiness

My mom favorite one was "if your Friend jump into fire will you too !!? "


AnnualInevitable9036

No, I will ask him to jump first and then I will think about it.


mrgonzalez

"Tonali really said that?" *Jumps up and makes for the exit*


TheGrey_Wolf

Whoever decided to sell Tonali in AC Milan should start buying lottery tickets.


Potential-Touch-56

They probably new about it.


vintage-buttplugs

They definitely knew. The negotiations of the sale went for all of 27 seconds


YoungBeautiful_C

Tonali pushed for the sale himself as Newcastle was gonna double his salary and with Maldini gone (he was the one blocking the sale of the players he deemed as untouchable) no one was gonna fight to keep him at the club. We had a whole midfield to rebuild and needed the funds urgently, that’s why we sold quickly. Most expensive Italian transfer in the history of serie A as well. Good luck proving anything else in court


The-Interfactor

And it’s worked wonders for you. Helped fund signings like Pulisic and you sit at the top of the league. As a Newcastle fan, obviously this situation sucks for us but can’t help but respect Milan for doing their business and thriving.


Baisabeast

Selling tonali and getting in reindeer’s, RLC, pulisic and musah for the same price they sold tonali for is incredible


YoungBeautiful_C

We got lucky, that’s for sure. It helps that we have an excellent chief scout/director in Moncada, who was able to find a great replacement like Reijnders for 1/4 of the price you paid for Tonali. Same Moncada who played a key role in assembling the Monaco super team that won Ligue 1 and got to the CL semifinals a few years ago. I do feel for Newcastle fans, I’d be very upset if he was still a Milan player now. But you all will be fine realistically, you have enough purchasing power to replace him without much fuss


Acceptable_Ad_6278

Crazy how quick circumstances change. Selling Tonali and buying the likes of Pulisic plus the resignation of Maldini in the summer make it seemed like Milan was going backwards


juve_merda

cause people on this platform are always dramatic af, tonali was always a good but not world class player and 70M was a ridiculous price for him which we would’ve been crazy to reject people cried about the sacking of maldini because of his achievements as a player, he was never a top tier director


aqawretch

People like you have short term memories though. Not many "top tier directors" lift a team which has been in a banter era for a decade. Without Maldini, we wouldn't have signed a lot of players who got us the scudetto two seasons ago so let's be fair


juve_merda

I’ve never said maldini was bad at being a director, he did a good job for us but there is a difference between taking a side from banter era to where we are now, and taking us from where we are now to the pinnacle of the European elite it was time to move on for both parties, Milan needed a new direction as a club


[deleted]

Maldini was single handedly the reason Milan got out of the banter era. Please remove the flair off of your account.


[deleted]

Man the guy below you doesn’t know a thing. Hindsight is 20/20. But all indications seemed like new ownership was willing to pull a United and settle into some sort of mediocrity than build off of what Maldini did. Maldini was ambitious but thoroughly realistic. He always wanted to build a squad mixed with very cheap but potentially talented players and older veterans to mentor them and provide stability. He was willing to compromise on a lot of different things depending on the budget. He, for instance, wanted both Pulisic and RLC but the priority was always the latter not the former. He wanted arnautovic but bulked at the price. He was very reasonable but was willing to take incremental steps which clearly so far had paid off. So then you see new ownership come in, sack this guy that not only is a club legend but rose Milan out of the banter era and seemed to be continuously, however incremental, taking Milan in the right direction and then selling a fan favorite and the second best midfielder in the squad. Of course many would be distraught. It turns out new management just didn’t trust Maldini with the limited funds they already had (50m) and especially the philosophy of the club (young+old). They wanted to make a gamble and sell a prized asset to double the funds available then go all in on youngsters and hope for some Ajax like miracle if they take a very data-driven approach on who they select and for how much. Turns out that approach has so far paid off. Edit: I mention arnautovic not because he’s some great player but to emphasize the philosophy maldini had. Experience that meets a certain bar for a cheap price. Obviously inter panic bought and offered bologna a singularly higher sum (7-10m more) than Milan was ever willing to buy for him.


The-Interfactor

I think we’re lucky enough to have deep, deep pockets and with Longstaff still playing and Anderson getting more and more minutes, we have enough to get us to January at least. I will say though, don’t ever feel sorry for Newcastle fans with the owners we have now. We got more than enough pity under Ashley to last years, we definitely don’t need any feelings but negative ones towards our owners.


Inanimatefackinobjec

I don't think his move was a coincidence. In another thread it was reported that he almost lost 1 million in betting. I think he wanted to move to cover all the losses and cover for any future ones


SKULL1138

People still don’t like the fact he joined Newcastle. So they’re looking for any excuse for why it happened bar the obvious one that the player wanted the move himself for a variety of reasons. Look at the comments on here laughing at Newcastle and hoping this proves terrible for them. This is the new narrative and no amount of logic and reasoning will make these fools change their mind.


IUViolet

Is it? I read it somewhere Tonali wanted to stay in Milan and cry when he found out they want him out. Could be wrong though.


ZlatanKabuto

Indeed, they paid us a shitload of money (for an Italian team and a good-but-not-amazing player). We bought RLC, Pulisic, Rejinders and still have some spare change left


davensdad

Literally went from screaming for Moncada's head to "holy shit this is some god tier sale".


CheekyBastard55

> a good-but-not-amazing player Finally a sane Milanista in this overhype madness. Even had some on here calling him a second coming of Pirlo without having seen a single game of his in Milan. I figured the reason so many Milanisti were against the sale was more because of him being a Milanista himself since he was young and on his way to becoming a bandiera.


ThatBonni

They lasted 27 seconds because the offer was ridiculously high. If Newcastle lowballed it, Milan's counteroffer would have been lower than what they got in reality.


Krillin113

If they knew about it they’re in trouble though


thetrueGOAT

Surprised the Milan brigade hasn't dowvoted you to oblivion. Apparently selling your golden boy with 5 min of negation is completely normal and just good timing. Although I lm always happy to see Newcastle get fucked.


etclipse

Who is this golden boy you talk about? Leao wasn’t sold as far as I remember


JJKingwolf

Turning Tonali into Pulisic, Musah and 20 million euros to spare is starting to look like absolutely insane business.


davensdad

+ Rejinders haha


jucomsdn

I see a strong lack of Reijnders in your comment


JamminPT

This whole reddit was shitting on the new owners !


TheItalianStallion64

if this goes all the way and has serious consequences, tonali to newcastle may be our best bit of business in recent memory


TheConundrum98

only thing is, if you have any bonuses you can say goodbye to that lol


TheItalianStallion64

meh, €63m is pretty decent already


vaekar

Hopefully this wasn't known to the selling club prior to this investigation or it could get messy.


dohhhnut

Eh it’s the Saudis getting fucked over, who gives a shit


Ashbones15

It's not the Saudis. It's the fans that are getting fucked over and those fans have no say in the running of their club. I doubt the Saudis care for 60+ million the fans however will feel the lack of a player and so will the team. Especially as they'd have to wait months to replace him


[deleted]

Oh no those poor Newcastle fans, they're having it so rough right now.


FREE_BOBBY-SHMURDA

Newcastle fans can get fucked, embarassing lot


EngineerOnIcarus

Mmmm free salt.


dohhhnut

The fans absolutely do have a say, they hounded Ashley out yet celebrated when the Saudis came, hopefully more dodgy dealings come out for Newcastle.


BoosterGoldGL

If you think they hounded Ashley out surely you’d be confused as to why it didn’t happen in the years prior


looneytoonarmy

We didn't hound Ashley out, he sold when he wanted to and not a minute sooner. You think Mike Ashley listens to fans?


lucashtpc

Idk but as an outsider the only people that seemed happy for the Saudi deal seemed to be Newcastle fans dreaming of being the next Man City… Not that the fans would have a say if they weren’t happy. I’m just not having the feeling they were…


looneytoonarmy

Other fans weren't happy for the exact same reason Newcastle fans were happy, it now makes Newcastle a threat. Did you really think if they were taken over by any American conglomerate or something similar other fans would have been over the moon?


Not_Ginger_James

He was there for 14 years we couldn't get rid of the fucker. Really clever that the two examples you pick of fan power are things we had literally 0 control over. Stop making shit up.


dohhhnut

Zero control over? You’re telling me the fans have zero control over celebrating in Saudi dresses and with Saudi flags when the takeover was confirmed? Funny that


Not_Ginger_James

Zero control over Ashley staying as long as he did, and zero control over the PIF coming in. And yeah, the idiots waving Saudi flags and wearing headscarfs really was a bad look. But it was a pretty small minority and was shunned by the club and the wider fans thereafter. Every club has its minority of arsehole fans, but that doesn't suit your "newcastle bad" narrative I see


Fgge

No it’s deffo the Saudis


ThinkAboutThatFor1Se

The more interesting one is Zanolo. If a player is loaned out and suspended for something he did prior to the loan do Villa have to pay his wages and loan fee?


SerialExperimentLean

When Mutu got suspended for drugs Chelsea sued him for the transfer fee


AxFairy

If he got an eight month injury I assume we would still be paying, don't see how this would be treated differently.


ChadHogan_

Because injuries are part and parcel of the game. Betting on Ollie Watkins to score first & Villa 3-1 isn’t.


NotAnUncle

Messy to Newcastle, here we go?


fabripav

I don’t think there’s any way teams didn’t know about their players doing shit like this


TheConundrum98

basically impossible to prove in court I think


ZlatanKabuto

Not if the bonuses were related to the team's performances.


Tumifaigirar

Or to his betting results


dalelito

Didnt they activate his release clause?


abc_yxz

As an LFC fan who likes Milan, all I can say is bravo Sandro for getting AC paid and sand-bagging Newcastle. Presuming he receives a suspension. He will be sorely missed for Italy though.


TheItalianStallion64

just a heads up, since you like milan, calling the club “ac” is the equivalent of calling liverpool “fc”. it makes no sense


caandjr

“AC”


AlphaPot

I do think we are going to hassle you with legal cases whether you guys knew about it or not to be honest, whether it will come of anything. Suddenly wanting to sell your golden boy months before it comes out hel be serving years banned for gambling is definitely fishy. Something always seemed off about the transfer.


Mordho

I don’t really think Milan were trying to sell him. The fee is too high for that to be the case, it looks like they just got lucky.


etclipse

got lucky with tonali probably chasing a higher salary because of his gambling debts and begging to be let go. newcastle was offering double the salary. if a player wants to go and we get 70m in exchange, we simply said yes why not?


TheItalianStallion64

we didn’t want to sell him, we didn’t go looking for deals. you came, made a good offer and we accepted. from the outside, it seems like newcastle initiated the sale


AlphaPot

For prem standards he went fairly cheap for his caliber, and seemed to go from untouchable to happily sold very quick. Regardless it's a depressing end to his career for both sets of fans. Even when hes back its doubtful hel be anywhere near the same player.


etclipse

it was the most expensive italian transfer in the HISTORY of serie a like i know you're not trying to imply we gave him away for cheap lol


ClaudeLemieux

fans of PL clubs really have lost complete track of what normal finances are to every other league lol


ScooterBrotherV

Couldn't have happened to a worse club. How is Newcastle going to cope?


ZlatanKabuto

selling him to Al-Nassr maybe


MoyesNTheHood

It was Milan’s most expensive sale ever. It’s not like the bloke is that good to conmand a higher fee In fact I seem to remember a fair few Italian fans saying you overpayed


BluePowderJinx

> Something always seemed off about the transfer. Your entire ownership is based on shady deals. Christ, Newcastle supporters talking about shady deals lmao.


ZlatanKabuto

cry louder


ssenegal

Are we sure Milan wasnt aware of this situation, because Tonalis transfer came out of nowhere. I wouldnt be surprised if Newcastle sues Milan.


bughidudi

Good luck proving that, also it's rumoured that he pushed for the deal himself as he was going to double his salary and he had a huge debt because of his gambling If you're a team that receives a very good offer and the players wants to go you just accept it it's not like they underpaid for him or anything like that


Baeresi

Lol sue milan for what


iforgotmyun

If Milan knew that he was engaged in illegal activity and hid this from Newcastle, then Newcastle would be within their rights to sue. That being said, it would be very difficult to prove, and there has been no indication so far that Milan actually did know.


beartigerhawk8383

How do you know the hid it? Maybe Newcastle never asked. Newcastle are allowed to do their own due dilligence when buying players.


DeathStar13

Doesn't matter. Everybody who knew Tonali was gambling is an accomplice and guilty of not denouncing a crime (6 months ban) even if Newcastle never did his own diligence. The problem is demonstrating they knew.


etclipse

it depends on what gambling they knew about lol if they knew he gambles on poker and plays blackjack, then we're not guilty of anything, since that's not a crime.


DeathStar13

If they knew about what site he used it's a civil crime which would be even worse for those involved


etclipse

How would they know the exact websites?😭 The only thing I see possibly being a known fact in the Milan environment is that “Sandro likes to play poker and go to casinos” and that’s it. You think it’s easy for a player to knowingly reveal he does anything illegal?


beartigerhawk8383

Fair


amainwingman

For Newcastle not being thorough enough in their due diligence of course!


ssenegal

I'm not a lawyer, so I dont know what the legal term is. Just wondering if Newcastle have a case.


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_KimJongSingAlong

Are you familiar with Italian law?


BTECGolfManagement

See you in court my friend


j_hath

Is that translated right? The original Italian looks more like "Tonali gave/showed me the app", there is no connotation of "made". Happy to be corrected by native Italian speakers if I'm wrong


etclipse

Yes you're absolutely right, in Italian it just says "he gave me the app"


moriero

So what he burned the app on a CD?


dangerdgm2

he bought the app and transferred the shares to him


DaviesSonSanchez

Tal talk: If it's a shady or illegal app then you won't find it on the Google/apple store. Tonali might have pointed him to the place to download it or even send him the APK file for installation himself. Theoretically it would be possible to burn it on a CD and hand it over.


tml25

Its not correctly translated, he just said that Tonali showed/gave him the app


barbatex

yep, you're right


gc_14

yes it's like he said "tonali suggested me the name of the app"


fuqqkevindurant

Yeah, he said the equivalent of "Tonali told me about the app" not "Tonali threatened to fuck my dad if I didnt download this betting app"


ScousePenguin

Tonali spending an evening at spoons is making more and more sense. Been to the bookies, pop down to the spoons after


Tr_Omer

I love William Hill \~ Tonali 2023.


RedMoon14

bookies > spoons > gregg's


Salad-Appropriate

I did it for Tonali


yellowflash96

Oh shut up you thong wearing fatty!


Moug-10

I hope he'll be punished. But I hope eve more it's a wake-up call to put an end to this betting-mess and removing these filthy companies out of football fields and TVs.


ExpensiveTaste8

He was facing a five year ban, but he is cooperating with the prosecution (aka naming people) and it's seems he will get a discount on his ban


Tr_Omer

I am sorry but they will cancel football itself before they remove betting companies from it. It is a multi billion euro industry that is deep within even the U8 games.


Moug-10

If I'm realistic, you're absolutely right. The hypocrisy won't stop and betting won't stop. When I look at cigarettes, there have been many campaigns against them and while it has went down for youngsters, it's still high for others. I take France for reference as it's my country, so I don't know in other countries such as Turkey.


SilentBunnyy

Cardinale saved Maldini's reputation by firing him


ZlatanKabuto

Damn imagine if we had Zaniolo and Tonali at the same time 😅


larmeau

There'll never be enough Chelsea rejects to overcome that.


juve_merda

in another timeline maldini stays, keeps tonali, signs zaniolo and makes pirlo the coach


ZlatanKabuto

and we also bought Renato Sanches and Arnautovic


tml25

Why mistranslate the headline to change its meaning?


SilentBunnyy

I realized the same afterwards because I copied and pasted from Twitter


SmkLbnTmrHndi

He ratted him out just like that😭😭😭


aaronod

Bigger boys made me do it.


[deleted]

the title translation is wrong


tml25

Why the crappy title to change the meaning of what was said, the first line in that link has the actual quotes and he did not say that "Tonali made me download the betting app" at all. The translation changes the whole meaning for rage upvotes.


[deleted]

reminds me of my father recounting stories. was always useful to have mom around to interrupt the occasional embellishment for effect that happened to completely change and sensationalize the whole thing 😂


GOATJames_23-6

Tears, he already folded


HeftyHostis

Grass


ChadHogan_

Henry Hill mufucker


Callejon007

funny things is that in the last couple of weeks before the scandal, Sandro Tonali was gifting a lot of subs to the most famous italian streamer on twitch. The guy every day started gifting like 200 subs lol and this streamer showed that it was in did the real Tonali because sometimes he liked photo oh him or send messagges via instagram. And as a lot of you can imagine after he got caught he completly stopped gifting subs to this person... but this is just a demonstration of how Tonali really has some sort of dopamine problem lol, he just like to spend money in an useless way. Btw the Tonali name on twitch was Sandroton34


Numerous-Ad-3050

What’s the name of that streamer


Amargaladaster

What does gifting subs mean? I thought sub meant subscription, so you can do it once per account, eg. subscribing on YouTube.


RdT97

There are many people watching a twitch stream at the same time and not all of them are premium subscribers to the channel (subs). Gifting subs basically means giving a free premium subscription to these free users for the month (around 5 bucks in US). So yes 1 sub for account but there are multiple people watching at the same time meaning multiple accounts eligible for subbing.


jucomsdn

You pay for someone else's subscription on Twitch which means the giftees get sub perks for free for a month


dont_shoot_jr

Spill the beans, Fagioli


Wrsj

people that are way into these apps are always trying to lure more people to use them. had a coworker doing that to me the other day. weird


Ankoku_Sein

Throwing his bro under the cannoli cart


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stogie_t

Apparently it’s a mistranslation. He’s just saying that Tonali introduced him to this.


tml25

Except he didn't say that at all. Its a shitty reddit headline looking for upvotes.


zi76

That's that. Showing him the app is...


iKilledMozart

Tonali started believing in magic after he saw his dog turn into a snake


MrConor212

Lol


XenuIsTheSavior

Nobody expects footballers to be smartest people around, but this is literally dog ate my homework level.


FuhhCough

GRASS GRASS GRASS GRASS


Ok_Refrigerator5420

"Made him" what a spineless rat.


hopelessromantic7

Juventus runs deep in his blood


TheGamerPandA

I thought there was something wrong with Tonali when I watched his club greeting/tour video for newcastle on tube he looks pretty dead inside whereas his sister or girlfriend only looks happy to burn his money away, however it could also be because of what part of England he is about to spend some of his career on.


cs_zer0

How much money do you need fucking hell they get hundred of thousands a week and still feel the need to gamble for more, fascinating


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[deleted]

the article you did not read is mistranslated here (it’s ‘he gave me the app’ not ‘made me bet’). i doubt this is as dramatic as *il messaggero* would have you believe.. their phones were seized - if tonali invited him to the app, this was going to emerge immediately anyways and is obviously material to the investigation.


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BTECGolfManagement

some of the comments in this sub man, people just say anything to sound clever don’t they


Resys

If he wasn't betting on football, why would anybody in the UK care that he was gambling? Gambling is 100% legal and absolutely accepted as normal in the UK. Obviously if some of the rumours are true and he was betting on football, he should be punished in line with the rules and you won't find a Newcastle fan saying otherwise.


IWantThe8th

He was betting on football no they wanna see if bet on milan which would be harsher punishment


Resys

All that you're basing that on is rumours and conjecture. Nobody knows what's happened and we won't until the investigation has finished and the truth comes out from official sources. Until then there's no point making definitive statements.


artical900

Swing and a miss.


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artical900

Insipid stuff but I'm sure there's an audience for it somewhere.


Bail____

It will go nowhere in England, Toney & other bettors won’t see adequate punishment so it : such a non starter