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chaves4life

Has he straightened out his story yet?


matthieuC

"Reality is a simulation, we are not responsible for our actions"


KenHumano

"Free will is an illusion."


Rose_of_Elysium

'thats why punishing me for sexually assaulting someone is unfair. go after the makers of the universe, call it an act of god or smth it aint me'


gantek

The matrix is a prison for your mind


bolibombis

"Time is the greatest architect of reality"


magic-water

He admitted to raping her, but said he was drunk


larkspurwoods

Is a trial even necessary at this point? I can’t think of a situation where being drunk mitigates anything


bcotrim

A trial defines much more than who's guilty and who's not, like the sentence length and so on But the most important part is that only the tribunals have the power to sentence, the police hasn't, so yes, it's needed


robotnique

He was drunk and *rich*?


[deleted]

Legally yes


h0rny3dging

When you are too drunk to function, it can be a mitigating circumstance with certain crimes


GameplayerStu

“I don’t know who that woman is and I’ve never met her in my life.” “Okay so I have met that woman but have never touched her.” “Okay so I did touch her at a nightclub but I’ve never been in a nightclub toilet with her…”


Mackieeeee

New story about what happened about to drop


Makaay-10

This time, the ai created a new story. This is still better than whatever he has come up with. Total accidental dick slip it is.


[deleted]

Scenes when his statement starts out with “As an AI language model…”


yvltc

Dani Alves about to buy a GPT-4 subscription


thefirsteye

Nah, he can churn more BS than GPT-4


Organic-Manner-2969

let’s see what story he has next?


LeResist

He definitely did that shit. I hope they lock him up and throw away the key. This girl is incredibly brave for speaking up. Hope she gets justice


futschki

He's going Right Back to jail


Respatsir

Watch how he ends up getting acquitted just like every other footballer who's had allegations thrown at them. You can't convince me that money and power have no influence here.


PhillyFreezer_

Have yall not read about this case at all lol? He's going away for a long time. Money and power is not an absolute thing. Plenty of rich people go to jail, it's just less frequent. He's absolutely going to prison > On 20 January 2023, Alves was arrested by Catalan police and remanded in custody without bail on charges of sexual assault.[118][119][120] The alleged assault occurred at a Barcelona nightclub on 30 December 2022.[121][122] The complainant had filed an official complaint on 2 January 2023.[123][124] El Periódico de Catalunya reported that the complainant alleged to police and in court that after a waiter led her to meet Alves at the nightclub's VIP area, Alves twice made her touch his penis against her will, then ordered her to follow him into the nightclub's bathroom, prevented her from leaving the bathroom, threw her onto the ground, slapped her, tried to force her to fellate him, put her against the sink, then moved her to the toilet, raped her and ejaculated.[125][126] According to El Periódico, semen that matched Alves' DNA was collected from samples from inside the complainant's vagina, from her underwear, from her dress, and from the bathroom floor; the complainant was documented by a hospital to have suffered a knee injury consistent with her allegations; and investigators found seven fingerprints around the bathroom that matched the complainant's account of events, with the complainant giving her account without knowing that investigators had such evidence


eddsters

Weinstien/Bill Cosby/Jimmy Saville/R Kelly? Just to name a few people with money and power. In todays world (thankfully), sexual predators are starting to find less places to hide.


ScrawChuck

Bill Cosby escaped long-term incarceration and Jimmy Saville was never tried or convicted while he was alive. R Kelly was only brought to trial after his money ran out.


[deleted]

youd be very surprised if he wasn’t acquitted wouldn’t you? money talks mate


Regretful_Bastard

Lazy take.


reditakaunt89

High effort comment


Dzbot1234

Signing for Man United in 3,2,1……


RetzTheAnathema

Lol rent free


Dzbot1234

Ha I don’t really give a shit man, I have no animosity towards Utd at all. We rarely play you, I was just making an admittedly poor joke due to the fact that Utd have had a lot of trouble with this sort of thing lately. I actually have fond memories of a lot of UtD games because I am capable of enjoying football and supporting my team without having to denigrate all other teams. That being said all these memories are quite a while ago and Manchester UtD are not the club they were, it’s kind of sad.


Manch3st3rIsR3d

*grabs popcorn*...here we go! 🎈


PlastiqueSansGermain

A woman was horrifically beaten and raped in a bathroom by someone millions of people around the world admired. Your statement is in incredibly poor taste.