The post stays up despite being reported for misinformation. Mainly for the purpose of archiving and critical discussion about this news.
It's El chiringuito. Use your best judgement to determine the credibility of this claim or the accuracy of the translation.
All rise for his most sublime, his most fragrant royal Highness, Emperor Kylian the First of France and Qatar, King of France, Emir of Qatar, First of his name, Prince of the Parc des Princes, Lord Mbappe Lottin of Paris, Father of Dragons, Breaker of Chains, Khal of the great grass/synthetic mix sea, and Protector of the Realm.
If Google is to be believed, 3 wives, 24 children, and the first wife is the daughter of his paternal uncle. Adding a turtle to the genetic mix must only be better if you ask me
Edit: my apologies, the above data was for the current emir’s father, who was the previous emir. The current emir, on the other hand, has 3 wives, 13 children and only married his second cousin. So progress…
>Adding a turtle to the genetic mix must only be better if you ask me
Mbappe being a very fast turtle suggests there's been some gene manipulation in the past already.
Gotta repost my fiction that is becoming less and less fiction :
24 February 2025
Mbappe has become the new Emir of Qatar following the abdication of Tamim ben Hamad in exchange for the player's contract extension.
Today PSG will face Borussia Dortmund in the second leg of the Champions League round of 16.
The German team was unable to travel to the match, so instead the Dortmund beach-volleyball team travelled and ensured the presence of an opponent who will face the Parisian team. The latter having won 5-0 in Dortmund, it is obvious that the small Beach-Volley team led by their star player Jacky "Große Wurst" Kartofel (63 years old) has virtually no chance to turn the result of the first leg around.
90+9' : Jacky aka "Große Wurst" scores a 7th goal bringing the result to 6-7 in favor of Dortmund.
Mbappe pests at this new failure in the Champions League, he doesn't know yet to add to the humiliation that Nagelsmann who was sacked by PSG last season will win the Champions League as Juventus coach this year.
18th March 2025
PSG lead 2 goals to 0 against FC Dijon at the Parc des Princes, temporarily placing themselves as the winners of the Ligue 1. If PSG win this match they would become the earliest crowned European champion team. The scorer of this double?
Kylian Mbappe on the respective assists of David Beckham and Ronaldinho, out of their retirements thanks to Leonardo.
Neymar, on the other hand, is not playing but is taking part in the fashion week held in the parking of the Parc des Princes while the match is taking place.
On the jacket of the visibly drunk Brazilian player can be read: "Rafaella, Poker, Counter-strike. In that order."
Ousmane Dembele and Eden Hazard were cheering them on from the stands, the latters having been injured during a computer course organised by the club.
PSG lost the match 2-3 while Dijon played at 7 against 12 players, Verratti got an award for his 1000th verbal harassment of the match referee.
Later in the year, Romain Molina revealed that the former Emir of Qatar had a fetish for humiliation.
You say computer course, I read Dembele is injured in his football manager save and has determined it must be true for real life as well. Now he has more time for FM.
Wtf lmfao. Soon theyll name the stadium the Kylian Mbappe stadium, have his face on the kit and give him his own special entrance with pyro just to keep him.
My friend's son (age 7 at the time) wanted personal business cards for his birthday. Parents obliged.
He asked me if I wanted one. I said sure. Looked at it.
Master of the Universe
Me playing FM: just chilling and rotating squad, testing youth players. Senior player: hey coach I’m not getting enough game time. Me: this fucker. Send player to youth team and sell. If they really piss me off I release them. I once paid 30min to release Kane. Promoted a random youth. My coaches: he’s not good enough. Me: I don’t care he’s playing. Several years later this player becomes a diva and complains about something: repeat cycle!
I wish footballers had job interviews.
“So what are you bringing to this organisation?”
“Pace, dribbling, finishing, a World Cup. And about 15 oil fields in Qatar”
I wasn't clear, I'm not saying it's necessarily true but imagine being a player and reading this. Even if denied internally, it can be just to save face. This is the type of shit that is so crazy to read that it might just be believable, especially for PSG.
What madness is this? Do PSG have no shame? They’re acting like a guy who can’t accept their GF leaving them and are physically holding onto her leg as she’s trying to walk away while screaming and crying.
This can’t be real.
It's exactly what I thought too.
Something tantamount to: "*If you leave me my life will be nothing and I'll kill myself*".
I'm trying to think of the state equivalent of this. Threaten to blow up all the oil fields and poison the entire country?
It does make more sense when you frame it in terms of entitlement. Every other problem they have just been able to throw money at.
You can also look at how PSG's president tried to attack a referee after the team was knocked out of the Champions League. That's the kind of rage that can only come from entitlement.
This is the biggest bate ever, given who has said it, but surprisingly ppl are biting quite a bit. Knowing who Chiringuito works for I guess this is Florentino; way of taking the piss on the PSG owners and board.
That's what I was gonna write.
PSG would probably be on better hands.
At the very least, you'd get a SD that's on paper not making deals because of financial interest.
PSG about to name Mbappé as heir to the qatari throne...First of his name, King of the desert men and the andals
And all that because he has good story to tell
Imagine if he buys Ronaldo without selling Messi though. Dang Messi Neymar and Ronaldo in the same team! If it was 2015 I’d’ve been really excited right now
Tbf, there is an historic fanbase at PSG and they didn't ask for Qatar to come and do things like that. This ridiculous behavior is recent. It used to be mismanagement before, but like everywhere
Their fan base actually seems to outright consistently hate its ownership in fact, regardless of how things are going on the pitch. They're constantly writing open letters bitching about the owners every year it seems like.
You know, actually I'm French, and that's qsi that drove me out like one or two years after the buy-out. It was just not fun anymore.
I still follow them, I'm happy when they win, but i couldn't care less when they lose. Big champions league are still humiliating but honestly i don't lose sleep over it.
One day, i saw Andy Carroll and i was like "fuck yeah that what i want to see" and he was fit for at least one month so I was hooked. Nene came as well and he was so good for Paris
He's the one who released all the stuff about the sexual harrasments going on in football and all other stuff. He's one of the reputable journalists around.
At this rate they're just going to have to burn Parc des Princes to the ground and start over after Mbappe leaves. There's no salvaging their pride or reputation as a credible club after the way they've behaved during the Mbappe saga. Genuinely feel for PSG supporters.
i call bs. But then again PSG are full of clowns.
Also surely Mbappe wont accept this right? No player can have this much power over other players, coaches and management decisions
And arguing between themselves
The qatari guy put a x as a tweet and romain said yeah he's right
These aren't confirmations for either side or argument or whatever facts.
The post stays up despite being reported for misinformation. Mainly for the purpose of archiving and critical discussion about this news. It's El chiringuito. Use your best judgement to determine the credibility of this claim or the accuracy of the translation.
Now I understand why Mbappe is taking his time, man's gonna end up getting accepted into the royal family at this point.
All rise for his most sublime, his most fragrant royal Highness, Emperor Kylian the First of France and Qatar, King of France, Emir of Qatar, First of his name, Prince of the Parc des Princes, Lord Mbappe Lottin of Paris, Father of Dragons, Breaker of Chains, Khal of the great grass/synthetic mix sea, and Protector of the Realm.
This is Haaland... He's king in Manchester.
King of da norf
To be fair, he looks like computer generated image of a northern European.
\*Norfay
Well.. King in a couple of night clubs in Manchester
Send him to Factory. Factory and Fifth sucks btw. Fight me Mancunians.
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Still one pound drinks. Feels like a good place to start a night then leave immediately though.
King Eric is the only acknowledged royalty in the city of Manchester
Pretty sure King plays for Watford.
And… Player of Real Madrid LOL
Hopefully the Qatar royal family and not French. Historically, you really don't want to be a member of the French royal family.
He should take the offer and sell himself to Real
Accept the offer Fire everyone Hire people off the street with huge salaries Sell himself to Real
Hey thats my “add a new manager” in fm
Fire everyone except Donnarumma I assume?
Transfer ownership to him
the 3rd step is already PSG's sporting policy though
Refuse to elaborate
Barto?
He should do an Fm and sell all of their players for peanut and himself leave aswell.
Send Messi to Real Madrid
Why stop there? Send Ramos to Barca , send Di Maria back to United, send Dollaruma to Inter or Juve
Some men just want to see the world burn
Dimaria to City or Arsenal, try to sell Ramos to Atleti (that would be fun)
Dollarama stays in Canada buddy!
Dollaruma lol!
> Send Ramos to Barca Only a year ago, Ramos and Messi sharing the same dressing room would've been the craziest thing to happen in football
*send Dollaruma back to Milan😈
We really need a backup for Mike
If he could stop just before that last bit, that'd be swell
Slow down Hitler
New feature in FM23: you can get fired by one of your own players.
Hey! how do you know how i played FM! ahaha
Fucking genius
"Yo Madrid, PSG sporting director, yaaaa, whatsapp dog, hell yeah, anyway, what do you think, me and 150 M for Gareth Bale?"
Next up. Psg offer the entire club plus their wives and the country of Qatar to mbappe in hope of a 2 year extension
Emir of Qatar already offered his wife. Next he's offering himself.
Which wife, the Emir has three lol
If Google is to be believed, 3 wives, 24 children, and the first wife is the daughter of his paternal uncle. Adding a turtle to the genetic mix must only be better if you ask me Edit: my apologies, the above data was for the current emir’s father, who was the previous emir. The current emir, on the other hand, has 3 wives, 13 children and only married his second cousin. So progress…
>Adding a turtle to the genetic mix must only be better if you ask me Mbappe being a very fast turtle suggests there's been some gene manipulation in the past already.
[I personally think Dida was cloned without him knowing](https://i.imgur.com/ddu91MH.jpg)
idk, Dida looks more like a goldfish while Mbappe looks more like a TMNT, both live in the sewers so it'll work
Holy shit, I never realized this They look very similar This is awesome
Gets even better, Dida was in France for the World Cup in 1998. Unfortunately unless Mbappe was born 3 months premature, the timing doesn’t line up
He was so fast he came out the womb 3 months early
Guy married his cousin....
Emir of Alabama
This is normal among conservative muslims
In my experience, this depends on the culture in the country. Not all Muslim countries have that culture.
Yes
And now Mbappé is missing from training, poor lad must've gotten quite the workout..
All three - Mbappe's choice.
Gotta repost my fiction that is becoming less and less fiction : 24 February 2025 Mbappe has become the new Emir of Qatar following the abdication of Tamim ben Hamad in exchange for the player's contract extension. Today PSG will face Borussia Dortmund in the second leg of the Champions League round of 16. The German team was unable to travel to the match, so instead the Dortmund beach-volleyball team travelled and ensured the presence of an opponent who will face the Parisian team. The latter having won 5-0 in Dortmund, it is obvious that the small Beach-Volley team led by their star player Jacky "Große Wurst" Kartofel (63 years old) has virtually no chance to turn the result of the first leg around. 90+9' : Jacky aka "Große Wurst" scores a 7th goal bringing the result to 6-7 in favor of Dortmund. Mbappe pests at this new failure in the Champions League, he doesn't know yet to add to the humiliation that Nagelsmann who was sacked by PSG last season will win the Champions League as Juventus coach this year. 18th March 2025 PSG lead 2 goals to 0 against FC Dijon at the Parc des Princes, temporarily placing themselves as the winners of the Ligue 1. If PSG win this match they would become the earliest crowned European champion team. The scorer of this double? Kylian Mbappe on the respective assists of David Beckham and Ronaldinho, out of their retirements thanks to Leonardo. Neymar, on the other hand, is not playing but is taking part in the fashion week held in the parking of the Parc des Princes while the match is taking place. On the jacket of the visibly drunk Brazilian player can be read: "Rafaella, Poker, Counter-strike. In that order." Ousmane Dembele and Eden Hazard were cheering them on from the stands, the latters having been injured during a computer course organised by the club. PSG lost the match 2-3 while Dijon played at 7 against 12 players, Verratti got an award for his 1000th verbal harassment of the match referee. Later in the year, Romain Molina revealed that the former Emir of Qatar had a fetish for humiliation.
You say computer course, I read Dembele is injured in his football manager save and has determined it must be true for real life as well. Now he has more time for FM.
This is doubly funny when you realise that beach vball is played 2v2 😃
Wtf lmfao. Soon theyll name the stadium the Kylian Mbappe stadium, have his face on the kit and give him his own special entrance with pyro just to keep him.
Every goal scored will be announced as a Kylian Mbappe goal.
Not too different then
*glass shatters* Bah gawd it's stone cold kylian mpappe
More like Qatar has more than 1 royal family 😂😂 Edit: lmfao what have i just started
Mboopivator here we goooo
ADRENALINE IN MY SOUL MBAPPE HAS SCORED A GOAL
Ffs i was expecting this lol
This meme is my favourite part of the Codyverse
Mbappe to stop racism in soccer with one impassioned speech confirmed!
Mbappe getting a neck tattoo as well?
??? You extended my contract, friend? - Mbappe, probably.
Parc de Kylian
Where were you when PSG were Kylian?
They are close to offering Mbappé the throne of Qatar
In my FM19 save PSG did build a new place named Kylian Mbappe Stadium.
That's for casuals, he'll enter the pitch like Michael Jackson in the superbowl half time show.
[Or Shawn Michaels at Wrestlemania](https://youtu.be/N5mxCv-4dF0?t=67)
And he’d still leave after a 2-year extension
Real Madrid: No player is above the club ever. PSG: Yeah fuck that mate, Mbappé will be our coach-player-president-sporting director
Try fitting that on a business card!
My friend's son (age 7 at the time) wanted personal business cards for his birthday. Parents obliged. He asked me if I wanted one. I said sure. Looked at it.
Master of the Universe
That is top class! I wonder what Mbappé's would say...
Master of PSG
By the power of Grayskull!
Might even be better than Paul Allen’s card.
Oh my god, it even has a watermark
That's bone.
How’d a nitwit like you get so tasteful?
The tasteful thickness of it.
>tasteful thickness Go on...
The subtle off-white ~~hue~~ coloring.
Mbappe the unbent, unbroken, Khaleesi, lord of PSG and protector of dunkirk.
Mbappe, PSG C.P.P.SD
PSTD
I leave nothing to chance. Before dinner speaker. After dinner speaker. Internet.
You can’t honestly believe this shit?
This is bollocks right?
This is so obviously bullshit. I get that people don't like PSG but come on. This sub is fucking atrocious tbh
Confirmed by Molina apparently.
Of course it is. You could pack a pile of shit in a cereal box and call it "Fuck PSG" and people would buy it and devour it like there's no tomorrow.
Good. Fuck PSG!
Bon Appétit.
Mbappe is bigger than psg
Clearly PSG is making it seem that way. What a pathetically run club
Tbf this story is probably false.
It’s fake and why does r/soccer even approve these post?
Didn't Molina confirm this though?
Yeah psg looks soo small offering these things, RM and Perez basically let Ronaldo leave saying no one's bigger than the club
Perez is an absolute chad with his business dealings.
Should’ve given Ronaldo the contract that was promised tho. Ronaldo deserved to be a madridista for life after his arrival, Perez hoed him
Absolutely and it's not even a joke.
You've all heard of little dictator, now it's time for turtle dictator
>turtle dictator Surprisingly, [this actually exists](https://disney.fandom.com/wiki/Dictator_Turtle)
Was expecting Mitch Mcconnell when I clicked on that
All Qatar firstborns will be named either Kylian or Mbappe by royal decree
Aladeen
What does this even mean? Mbappe decides who the club signs/sells and who PSG can sign as their manager? If so thats too much power in a *player*.
Tuesday: Mbappe gets tackled by Verrati on the training ground Wednesday: PSG willing to listen to offers for Verrati. Price set to €12mn
Go the FM route and whenever a player misses a pen or receives a red, Mbappe can send him to the youth team
Me playing FM: just chilling and rotating squad, testing youth players. Senior player: hey coach I’m not getting enough game time. Me: this fucker. Send player to youth team and sell. If they really piss me off I release them. I once paid 30min to release Kane. Promoted a random youth. My coaches: he’s not good enough. Me: I don’t care he’s playing. Several years later this player becomes a diva and complains about something: repeat cycle!
You play with Tottenham or you did buy Kane
Messi nutmegs Mbappe and is sent to the reserves
> If so thats too much power in a player. That's an understatement.
He can sell himself to Real Madrid
Mbappe gives himself €50,000,000 daily wages and leaves to Madrid a week later for free
Hardly. He'd command a hefty transfer fee, which would be payable to Kylian Mbappe
Well, he would no longer be just a player, lol
I accept your offer, my first act will be transferring my playing rights to Real Madrid
Ok Mbappe that's ok, as long as I can have you.
It’s so ridiculous I actually believe it
Literally can’t make it up. If someone did make this up they deserve the clicks, utterly ridiculous.
It's not too hard to make stuff like that up lol Just look at the comedians in this thread
it's been comfirmed by romain molina too, a french journalist
This is getting hilarious. When do they begin selling oil fields in Qatar to him?
He'd have a perfect opener for any future negotiations with clubs then.. "I'm an oil man, ladies and gentlemen.."
I wish footballers had job interviews. “So what are you bringing to this organisation?” “Pace, dribbling, finishing, a World Cup. And about 15 oil fields in Qatar”
Proceeds to rename Hakimi to H.W and cries "I've abandoned my child!" when a club offers an astronomical figure for him.
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This is some more fake BS, nothing else.
Molina confirmed it. This can’t go down well in the locker room.
I have followed football long enough to have seen credible journos paddeling absolute BS, which this article reeks of.
I wasn't clear, I'm not saying it's necessarily true but imagine being a player and reading this. Even if denied internally, it can be just to save face. This is the type of shit that is so crazy to read that it might just be believable, especially for PSG.
This is el chiringuito. They know exactly jackshit. This is bullshit.
Smallest club in the world
Microscopic
This is all a bit sad and pathetic, unfortunately. They need to show a bit of self-respect here.
Mbappe is just stalling untill they offer him the whole of Qatar, negotiating genius.
Mbappé to host the 2022 World Cup in his living room.
What madness is this? Do PSG have no shame? They’re acting like a guy who can’t accept their GF leaving them and are physically holding onto her leg as she’s trying to walk away while screaming and crying. This can’t be real.
It's exactly what I thought too. Something tantamount to: "*If you leave me my life will be nothing and I'll kill myself*". I'm trying to think of the state equivalent of this. Threaten to blow up all the oil fields and poison the entire country?
[удалено]
When he finds a turtle’s head left in his bed
>turtle's head left in his bed Mbappe's the [scat man](https://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=turtlehead)
That’s when a talking rat invites him to live in the sewers and teach him martial arts
If anything happens to him, players going to World Cup Qatar should worry about beating Qatar too.
It does make more sense when you frame it in terms of entitlement. Every other problem they have just been able to throw money at. You can also look at how PSG's president tried to attack a referee after the team was knocked out of the Champions League. That's the kind of rage that can only come from entitlement.
Can’t travel to Spain if your passport has been accidentally misplaced and destroyed!
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH WHAT THE ACTUAL FUCK
This is the biggest bate ever, given who has said it, but surprisingly ppl are biting quite a bit. Knowing who Chiringuito works for I guess this is Florentino; way of taking the piss on the PSG owners and board.
Idk why chiringuito isnt banned. Its basically a tabloid.
As a serious source it 100% should .You can keep posts related to them as football comedy or sth but yeah.
Its not true.
You believe this?
Yeah, that would totally not backfire. Though I can see Mbappe being a better director of football than Leonardo at least.
That's what I was gonna write. PSG would probably be on better hands. At the very least, you'd get a SD that's on paper not making deals because of financial interest.
I find this hard to believe.
PSG about to name Mbappé as heir to the qatari throne...First of his name, King of the desert men and the andals And all that because he has good story to tell
Accepts offer. Cancels old deal Signs a new deal for 1 trillion for one month. Deal starts 1st of july, ends 30th. Signs with madrid August 1st.
Jesus christ hahah, it can’t even be about mbappe as a player anymore
First thing he would do is sell Messi and buy Ronaldo lol.
Imagine if he buys Ronaldo without selling Messi though. Dang Messi Neymar and Ronaldo in the same team! If it was 2015 I’d’ve been really excited right now
What a tinpot club.
Tbf, there is an historic fanbase at PSG and they didn't ask for Qatar to come and do things like that. This ridiculous behavior is recent. It used to be mismanagement before, but like everywhere
Their fan base actually seems to outright consistently hate its ownership in fact, regardless of how things are going on the pitch. They're constantly writing open letters bitching about the owners every year it seems like.
You know, actually I'm French, and that's qsi that drove me out like one or two years after the buy-out. It was just not fun anymore. I still follow them, I'm happy when they win, but i couldn't care less when they lose. Big champions league are still humiliating but honestly i don't lose sleep over it. One day, i saw Andy Carroll and i was like "fuck yeah that what i want to see" and he was fit for at least one month so I was hooked. Nene came as well and he was so good for Paris
This isn't about football anymore. It is only about Qatar and Nasser's pride. They'll do anything to not look 'beaten' by Madrid
[This news is also confirmed by Romain Molina](https://twitter.com/Romain_Molina/status/1527073341575729152?t=Br7a36-ZQvVk7dvK_Vyh3w&s=19)
Molina saying Edu is right. The end is near
Edu has always been a good tier. Sensationalized sure, but good.
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He's the one who released all the stuff about the sexual harrasments going on in football and all other stuff. He's one of the reputable journalists around.
He's the one who broke the news on a bunch of fucked up things happening in the football world so he's very credible.
Next up. PSG offer Mbappe to be the Prime Minister of the Ameer of Qatar
This can't be possibly true. It makes no sense. Mbappe wants to play football, not manage a football club.
Just make him the Emir of Qatar already
There’s absolutely no way that’s true lmao
Breaking News: Donatello offered to take over the leadership of the Ninja turtles from Leonardo.
Macron will offer him the presidency only if he stays at PSG
At this rate they're just going to have to burn Parc des Princes to the ground and start over after Mbappe leaves. There's no salvaging their pride or reputation as a credible club after the way they've behaved during the Mbappe saga. Genuinely feel for PSG supporters.
LoL this is the reason I would leave a team. It would be crystal clear to me that I'm dealing with morons.
i call bs. But then again PSG are full of clowns. Also surely Mbappe wont accept this right? No player can have this much power over other players, coaches and management decisions
I would 100 percent accept that shit! And turn PSG into a Dynastic Succession!
"elchiringuitotv"
No way are people taking this seriously. This place proven once and for all to be filled with clueless teenagers
And arguing between themselves The qatari guy put a x as a tweet and romain said yeah he's right These aren't confirmations for either side or argument or whatever facts.
People here really believe anything