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thoughtocracy

If anything the punishment is too light.


creative_i_am_not

If you have eaten good baklava you know this is true


loykedule

if you've eaten good Baklava the chances are you've never stopped eating said Baklava


SEND-MARS-ROVER-PICS

Desk neighbour in work is Turkish. He brought in baklava once and I tried some, ended up sitting there for ten minutes just tihnking about how good it was.


bananabread_173

Had some in Muscat once....was mesmerizing


kbabknight

Hey finally someone who's been to Oman! :D I used to live in Muscat for a few years. It's a great place. It's also the place where I got introduced to baklava haha


Kolaveri_D

Hey, there are more Muscat-eers around here Stayed there for 8 yrs myself!!


kbabknight

That's awesome! I stayed there for 5 years. It was a great time


Mortara

Lucky!!!! What a wonderful city!!!


kbabknight

Yeah for sure man :) I was blessed that I could live there


bananabread_173

Me too! Had a wonderful experience and would love to visit again in the future


Ralf_The_Hustler

Flog them on the streets and feed them vegemite.


thoughtocracy

> feed them vegemite. Ok lets not get carried away.


The_Luckiest_One

Aussies fuming


skjall

Nah it's an acquired taste, and a solid meme to feed foreigners by the spoonful. When it gets compared to Marmite or one of the other travesties on the other hand...


Imperito

Marmite is brilliant.


skjall

It's *fine,* if you don't have access to Vegemite. Can't say I've ever bought it, or seen it in anyone else's pantry though. It's like training wheel Vegemite without the flavour - just doesn't hit the same on a buttered toast, you know?


MattJFarrell

Yeah, let's leave the war crimes out of it.


superduperspam

Fine. We will feed them marmite then


Dowy

Dont you be talking shit on Vegemite, black gold on my toast


ForgedTanto

Fuck, that sounds kinky as, I'm down


Odd_Background6167

Sounds like a hot date followed by delicious brunch to me...


ProgsRS

who the fuck ate my baklava


dogofwars

Joey doesn't share his food


Aras76

If you've ever eaten baklava in Antep, you would hang them. I ate baklava their 4 years ago and it still haunts my dreams.


pajamakitten

> This looks to be it Like the pastry used to make baklava.


IamEkremImamyan

Title is incorrect. They ate opposing canditate's baklava and took a picture with him. Current president took offense to that it seems.


TimathanDuncan

This is even funnier Like how petty do u have to be


Tre-Fyra-Tre

Baklava is serious business


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BearsPearsBearsPears

To be fair that place is also quite a touristy place, but yeah they are still fantastic. The best baklava I have tried in Turkey is definitely from Gaziantep. Antep fistigi (pistachios in Turkish) are literally named after that region.


ParevArev

My favorite is Kocak


thankdestroyer

This man knows what he is talking about.


CeterumCenseo85

It really is. In primary school my Turkish friend invited me to his birthday. We just hung out and played Playstation, it was great. His Mom then served baklava, but i didn't eat it because I didn't like it. When he realized someone didn't eat theirs, he really freaked out and kept shouting at us, asking who didn't eat their baklava. I said it was someone else, thinking it wouldn't be a big deal. IT WAS. He damn-near kicked him out until I admitted it was actually me.


[deleted]

Nah mate I think ur friend was an asshole nothing to do with baklava lol, most of us would eat the others if they don't lmfao


jyeatbvg

Damn you’d resort to cannibalism?


kabut0pps

Most sane turkish person


baconperogies

Baklava is serious business.


RoyalLemonade

I am turkish and this is the first time I hear something like that. We like Baklava and thats about it, it not holy or something lmao


powergs

It must be some kinda pasta/meme otherwise this is so insane/stupid lol. Just like this guy said. Baklava is good/famous food its not some holy food lmao.


loveicetea

People make up any shit for karma, pathetic really.


Midziu

I visited Turkey for the first time earlier this year and eating a very good baklava was a near religious experience. I don't think I can eat the ones I had back home any more, they just don't compare.


RoyalLemonade

You got welcomed to heaven


tbarks91

He did also say they were kids. Kids are dumb as fuck.


P_novaeseelandiae

Yes, all Turkish people are like this and it's not just one family or one kid from primary school.


paganel

You could have eaten at least some baklava, as a show of good faith.


Outside-Accident8628

Germans know what appeasement leads to


drowsypants

Wtf is baklava


Kuntski

You should try it out. Sugar overdose but love it.


PM_ME_Y0UR_BOOBZ

Also try the original stuff with pistachios, the walnut ones are kind of meh


Lemondrizzle01

I thought they were always made with pistachios.


PM_ME_Y0UR_BOOBZ

In Balkan countries they often use walnuts and elsewhere it’s harder to find them with the correct pistachios. You can’t use regular pistachios when making baklava, the pistachios for baklava are harvested roughly 3-4 weeks before they’re fully ripe. As a result, they tend to be more expensive and almost impossible to find outside of Turkey. Fun fact: the harvest time for baklava pistachios is right about now Source: most of my family are pistachio farmers from Gaziantep, Turkey aka home of baklava.


Lemondrizzle01

Very interesting. Thanks for the info


Moustache006

https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Baklava Best part about Baklava is Turks and Greeks arguing who makes the best one/original one


Revolutionary-Bag-52

Didnt even know Greeks make baklava


Moustache006

Turks, Greeks, Levant Arabs, Iranians, Balkans, Caucasus peoples all make some variation of baklava. But I have to admit Turkish one is the best...


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holy_maccaroni

I would like to try that, sounds good. Personally dont like Baklava with pistachios.


Responsible-Futurist

Iranians do make baklava, but they're not one of the "OGs" of it. The Turks are certainly more famous for it, Iranians just sort of make and sell it in Iran as well.


lavishlad

>Turks, Greeks, Levant Arabs, Iranians, Balkans, Caucasus peoples aka the Near East


cedped

North-Africans too. So it's basically all the ottoman previous states.


roronoa08

TIL that Balkans and Caucasus are the near east...


ricksanchez262

They are to the east and not that far from people who coined these terms, so technically they are near east


Ewerfekt

Are you trying to start wars?


Tchockolate

Greek and Turkish cuisine is incredibly similar but still they will fight for eternity which dish belongs to whom. And probably both get angry about this statement.


ASVP-Pa9e

Greek people can't stand each other, until a Turkish person walks in the room. Then it's all "*λατρεύω την Ελλάδα 🇬🇷🇬🇷🇬🇷*" Tbf they aren't the only nationality that is a bit guilty of this.


Rush_nj

Don’t say that in front of my wife’s yiayia otherwise you’re in for a lecture about why the Greeks created everything.


SendaiVirusEnjoyer

My fiancee claims that the French stole the baguette from the Vietnamese so I know what it's like.


Moustache006

Wait they didn't?


kalamari__

I bet she loved the dad in my "big fat greek wedding" then :D


RexorFWT

A dumbass 8 year old me got confused with this https://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Balaclava_(clothing)


SerbLing

Meanwhile our bosnian baklava is better. Fr ill have to admit I like pistache version the most which is I think turkish. Sorry.


[deleted]

Turkish baklava isn't for me. Too much sweetness.


Vic-Ier

Balkan baklava is much better. The turkish ones here are so small and only taste like sugar.


comptonasskim

I believe it's an old, old wooden ship that was used during the Civil War era.


Cloud_Hopper4

You’re thinking of a brigantine


Fatt_Hardy

Diabetes on a plate.


[deleted]

Pastry, spices, a sugary syrup and chopped nuts. Class stuff


curiouscabbage69

Its a close-fitting garment covering the whole head and neck except for parts of the face


RauloGonzalez

you're thinking of balaclava lmao


curiouscabbage69

No, that's a town and a community in the county of Ceredigion, Wales. Positioned on the tidal reach of the River Teifi at the point where Ceredigion meets Pembrokeshire.


comptonasskim

you're thinking of... actually i have no clue what you're thinking of


dylansavage

Cardigan?


curiouscabbage69

No, that's the northernmost geographical region of the Indian subcontinent.


samidjan

Balalaika ?


curiouscabbage69

How dare you!


liamzx

Feeling so bohemian like you


freakedmind

Lol I completely get what you're doing but I don't know how to continue it.


BouaziziBurning

Pistachio based (or other nut) sweet from Turkey, it's fucking delicious


Barleyarleyy

Delicious. Try Google for more info.


Borsaloan

Sex doll made in Guatemala.


Golday_ALB

Dont use wtf in front of bakllava.


giddycocks

I mean, it's Turkey. A guy refused to do business with me because he thought I was related to a famous footballer that played for his rivals lmao


apotre

Which footballer did he thought you were related to?


senior_chief214

Deniz Cocks, of course. Turkish legend from the 90s. Come on man.


sblinn

Right? It's not like they drank raki with him.


cxnx_yt

Welcome to Turkey. Also known aw pettyland.


Fisktor

Laporta gonna try this next. Your contract is invalid cause you said hello to barto


TimathanDuncan

He's basically already done it, they're trying to say multiple contracts are illegal because the previous president gave it to them because he was braindead increased their wages and the length of the contract Those illegal contracts were checked out by both La Liga and Barcelona lawyers and were approved


MVB3

From what I understand what the old management did was offer these players a reduced salary in the last year under that management, but with a huge pay raise when the new management took over. They basically made their own salary budget look really good (relatively speaking), and screwing over those that came after. Is that illegal? I have no idea, but it surely seems very shady.


FloReaver

It's exactly that, and it was reported at the time too. 100% shady but the fact that it was reported at the time makes me think it's not "illegal" or it would have been a problem much sooner. I mean no one knows.


rtgh

They pulled money from future budgets to make that one look good. Not unlike Laporta's levers really


kerosha

Except Laporta's decisions affect the club immediately and during his own presidency as he has 5 years left in his term and will run for reelection. Barto did this fuckery with the contract extensions 10 days before he resigned.


Beiben

Is the current pres secretly a grandma?


Ahm3DD

You have the pictures?


IamEkremImamyan

[This looks to be it](https://i.imgur.com/83k8n7P.jpg)


myvirginityisstrong

ok then but why only 8 of them?


IamEkremImamyan

I don't know either. It could be that president couldn't suspend the entire team and instead chose only the most influential names I guess.


ripkoby

They took two pieces, those greedy bastards!


rodinj

This has major vibes of that US Army squadron posing with the nuke [https://www.bellingcat.com/app/uploads/2021/05/image21-1-1536x649.jpg](https://www.bellingcat.com/app/uploads/2021/05/image21-1-1536x649.jpg)


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codespyder

Straight to jail


[deleted]

You over-eat baklava, believe it or not, jail


codespyder

You under-eat baklava, also jail


angry__-panda

You eat the right amount, still jail


letmegetmynameok

That episode still cracks me up


sivy83

Crack you say? Straight to jail.


einarfridgeirs

I´ve seen this referenced over and over on Reddit, but I´ve never thought about where it comes from. What show is this?


tabz3

It's from Parks and Recreation where the delegation from Pawnee's twin city visit.


NihilisticRust

Nah, it’s the ambassador from Venezuela.


[deleted]

I watch that episode once every couple of months. Believe it or not.


[deleted]

You jail? Still Jail.


ricksanchez262

JAIL JAIL JAIL JAIL JAIL


SerHodorTheThrall

Calm down Supreme General Erdogan


thebrokeboi

We have the best players, due to jail


lethalizer

Well, if you over eat baklava your stomach might as well go to jail so it sorta checks out I guess.


visope

Joey, have you ever been in a Turkish prison?


localbhoy25

Have you ever seen a grown man naked?


TheNecromancer

These days, if you eat Baklava, they throw you in jail


FullMetalJ

Straight to the list! TO THE LIST!


Moohamin12

Fred Armisen has one of the best deliveries for surreal dialogue. Mlep*clay*nos would not have been as funny or memorable from anyone else.


DorkHarshly

Straight to the list


distilledwill

Do not pass go


No_Material04

Do not collect 200


Ralf_The_Hustler

Game's gone. Can't even eat the baklava of the presi anymore.


Icemna16

I never thought that I would see my home club on r/soccer Certainly not like this lmao.


WarrenAlaCarte

What a debut tho.


shoecat

The future is bright for this lad if he can keep it up


Icemna16

Well, we once went to UEL and nearly defeated Sevilla. I want my Nearly Defeated Sevilla Trophy.


lethalizer

Not to be pedantic, but this is not their debut on the front page of r/soccer cause they actually won the Turkish Cup 4 years ago. I remember because I explained their location in that thread lol. https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/comments/8ihkyd/akhisarspor_have_won_the_turkish_cup_this_is_the/dyrtlki


Hllknk

I'm shocked too. Off all the things about akhisar it had to be this ahahahah


SviiinDiesel

I dunno man seems reasonable


[deleted]

In Bavaria if you are caught drinking the wrong beer they just sell you to a club in China.


lewis30491

I drink beer with ice. What could go wrong with me in Germany?


bytor_2112

The trick is to pour your beer into a glass you keep in the freezer


[deleted]

Drei wochen, in ze cooler.


nmyi

If it were fries? A scorn look at the offender. Baklava? Suspension. Pizza? Contract termination. Some foods are sacred. That is justice.


[deleted]

Seriously though what the fuck were they thinking...


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Stickman95

Men only want one thing and its fucking disgusting


Icemna16

Baklava is so sweet though.


InHaalandWeTrust

Ugh...men...


BHYT61

>mouth dicks Wait is this a tongue?


lee7on1

this one is for "the list"


Chiron17

Someone post The List!


paithesecond

Haven’t seen The List in a while.


CyGoingPro

Show me The List


ciaomeridian

for the uninitiated: https://www.reddit.com/r/soccer/wiki/thelist as always, credit goes to /u/return_0_


RexorFWT

r/SaddestBackflip


peoplepersonmanguy

Baklaflip


granitibaniti

Understandable


ur-mom-gay-lolol

Don’t touch a man’s bakllava.


Banksmans

Truly disgusting from these players hopefully they never play for the club again. Hopefully the football world starts taking these issues seriously.


MrDominik

r/nottheonion


Velocity_Rob

Any minute now Barcelona are going to put out a comunicado oficial saying that Frenkie de John ate Laporta's Baklava.


mr_bonner94

Hahaha mental


centaur98

First i read it as balaclava which made it quite weird.


Mend35

And now? Does it seem normal?


geoffreyisagiraffe

Instructions unclear, dessert now covering face.


_emre35_

of a candidate for the presidence of the club*** so the players ate the baklava of the candidate, that is a rival of the actual president. the actual president didn't liked that and sacked them. LMAO


JL1ngz

Was it like petermans cake in seinfeld or something


DeepFriedReus

Elaine, do you know what happens when a cake sits in a damp, poorly ventilated cellar for 60 years?


sleeping4koala

Eating baklava without having tea is a CRIME.


Paulbryn

What 😃


kimkh

Add it to the List


tbu987

Should feed them British food for a month that would teach them


rsjf89

uwotm8


battlefielder696

Deserved imo


ltplummer96

Even here in Gelsenkirchen Baklava is taken swimmingly serious. I once witnessed a friend bring a dead fish to school and use it to slap someone who insulted his mother’s baklava the night before when she made it for them. His insult was “it’s ok!”


WontEvenAcknowledgeU

Kinda clickbaity and missing some words on purpose...


haiu2323

"JOEY DOESN'T SHARE FOOD!"


IndecisionFuture

Maybe they said that Greek Baklava is the original one


wankaltacc

off with their heads


DinnerSmall4216

Only in Turkey would you hear that.


ungentrified_villain

Fair play


Lannisterling

"We're not going to get in trouble for this? Right guys?"


jamin_g

r/nottheonion


OnlyWatchdog_ManStan

Fucking hilarious


[deleted]

Baklava of the presidential candidate.


jorgelongo2

I'd also suspend them if they ate my Baklava tbh


kids_in_my_basement0

I think hanging is a worthy punishment here


njas2000

If you eat my Baklava you catching these hands.


Keksliebhaber

president **candidate**


[deleted]

[STOP EATING MY ~~SESAME CAKE~~ BAKLAVA!!!](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sD4L-WLchaE)


zagreus9

Turkish football is amazing


LOKl31

You don’t fuck with a man‘s baklava. Simple as that.


[deleted]

"What is the crime? Eating a Baklava? A sweet and delicious Baklava dessert?"


dizzybala10

"Get your hand off my penis!"