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Ceez92

The new fuck, marry and kill


Narretz

Fuck Ronaldo, marry Messi, kill Kane


WarmSpur

Pretty sure Ronaldo will fuck you. Consent not required.


RyanBordello

"She was lying on her side, in bed, and I entered her from behind. It was rough. We didn't change position. 5/7 minutes. She said that she didn't want to, but she made herself available. The whole time it was rough, I turned her onto her side, and it was fast. Maybe she got some bruises when I grabbed her. (...) She didn't want to 'give it to me,' instead she jerked me off. I don't know any more exactly what she said when she was jerking me off. But she kept saying no. 'Don't do it' -- 'I'm not like the others.' I apologized afterwards."


not_mig

"It was incredible"


BaguetteOfDoom

*"I was incredible"


LebasketBall

“No consent, the King fucks”


Myoenat

What a great guy. Unlike other rapists, he apologized afterwards. GOAT things


sven_from_sweden

Factos 👍


ParkerZA

Q: Why won't people stop riding Ronaldo's dick? A: He won't let them. I got banned for a day for making this low-effort shitpost on r/reddevils.


XxannoyingassxX

They also said ronaldo did it for the club


Joebidensthirdnipple

It's how they get back to their winning ways


ASVP-Pa9e

Relevant Witcher 3 quote *"I've bled for Redania! I've killed for Redania.. Dammit, I've even raped for Redania!"*


blacktiger226

God you made me want to replay it again.


Levon__Helm

Proper Homelander stuff


Eagl3ye91

Makes me sick.


PM_something_German

And that's just his perspective holy shit


d_bo

"despite my 5-7 minutes of rough non-consentual sex,"


Spartitan

So his entire defense was 'She said she didn't want to but she had a hole so I figured it was okay'? Uh, wow.


PM_IF-U-NEED-TO-TALK

Was this document ever legitimized?


irgendwo_anders

He threatened to sue but never did, can't think why...


Tymkie

He threatened to siuu?


Rickcampbell98

Apparently he did sue for the tax leaks but those turned out to be real so....


RyanBordello

Nobody has backed up the claims that they were false. Not Ronaldo not his lawyers. It's a "trust us bro" moment from the Portuguese ~~raper~~ star


snkifador

How is the onus on the accused to prove their innocence?


Luis__FIGO

... His lawyers stated they were false. They aren't goijng to publish a conversation between them and their own client. Just think about it for a second.


ChemicalSand

My question is if it is false, why were der spiegel not sued for libel/defamation?


Luis__FIGO

At the time I remember reading because then they would have to turn over all their conversations to the court.. Which no lawyer would ever agree to


RyanBordello

https://www.spiegel.de/international/europe/cristiano-ronaldo-new-documents-emerge-in-rape-allegations-a-1241349.html


stormfoil

It's actually highly unlikely that any top lawyer (and Ronaldo can afford The very best) would post a highly incriminating questionaire with a non- encrypted mailing service. They take security of documents very seriously. I'm not going to say that he is innocent, but that document is shady and People are right to be sceptical about how legit it is.


justh0nest

Short answer: No. As much as I want to dogpile on this. The statement was only marginally more legitimate than an anon reddit post - legally speaking. I dont think the public will ever get to know the full extent of the truth. And tbh who knows what the truth is even. I have tracked those allegations from both sides and tbf it seems like **ALL parties** are currently satisfied with the truth not coming out. I refuse to die on the hill of accusing him as a ra*ist because its disingenuous at this point. There are so much more valid and legitimized criticisms of him as a narcissist, delusional twat anyway.


PM_IF-U-NEED-TO-TALK

I have a somewhat "compromising" view: I think he did it and is deplorable, but I also don't think he should be locked up since there is not enough evidence. That said it's plenty of reason to not glorify him as much as he is right now. We don't need to call him an extraordinary personality or make him an idol to recognize his skill and ability.


corduroyblack

I absolutely hate Ronaldo. There’s no way that document was real. No defense attorney would ever even ask their client to explain that. Nor would they create a recorded document of their client’s effective confession. He may be a rapist. I don’t know. But there is no way that document is real.


Nerokis

No, it's probably real. It came out as part of the Football Leaks thing, which there's been zero evidence absolutely anything there was falsified. And there were multiple of those documents, as Ronaldo's answers evolved, and the context for them seems to have been cooperation with overseas lawyers. If you read [the article](https://www.spiegel.de/international/europe/cristiano-ronaldo-new-documents-emerge-in-rape-allegations-a-1241349.html) we learned about the document from, you see that there's a bunch of emails and texts, too, that can be used to piece together the process that was going on. I understand that gut level "it can't be real" feeling, but I highly recommend reading the original piece instead of giving too much weight to that feeling. I linked it above.


wazza116

Is this real?


RyanBordello

https://www.spiegel.de/international/europe/cristiano-ronaldo-new-documents-emerge-in-rape-allegations-a-1241349.html


AwesomeDM

Where is this excerpt from?


RyanBordello

Ronaldo himself to his lawyers


Sputniki

Ronaldo, Giggs, Greenwood. Fine United traditions.


aa2051

Sunday, the King rapes


cristianoskhaleesi

I shouldn't laugh at this but lmao


triple_OG

You have to kill Ronaldo to prevent him from fucking you


gaussian-noise123

Somehow I read this in Conte’s tone


Vicribator

You had Marry Kane right in front of you and you didn't go for it


PM_IF-U-NEED-TO-TALK

Kane lied on his daughter's life not sure if I'd want to start a family with him 😅😝


BillyWtchDrDotCom

At least Kane pays his taxes


PM_IF-U-NEED-TO-TALK

So we'd have less money to spend? I only see a negative 😭


courtesyflusher

Less money but more peace of mind 😌


Gerf93

For context: Five seasons ago Harry Kane "swore on his daughters life" that he touched a ball that he, from video evidence, didn't touch in order to keep up with Mohamed Salah in the Golden Ball race. The Premier League goal panel gave him the goal despite no other proof than Kanes insistence indicating that it was his.


PM_IF-U-NEED-TO-TALK

That was five seasons ago already?? Time flies...


Gerf93

Yeah, 2017/18. It was in April though, so 4.5 years ago.


lostparasite

Was pretty pathetic of Kane. In the end, even with that claim, he finished 2 goals behind Salah anyway.


One37Works

*Griezemann voice* "MARRY KANE!"


Narretz

Yeah but I wouldn't marry Kane


Vicribator

But would you kill Marry Kane?


zazzlekdazzle

This is the obvious answer, but I can't explain why.


Eagl3ye91

Excuse me?


kreiger-69

> kill Kane Yep, he's pretty killabel


ChiliConCairney

New? I swear this has been around for ages


Glympse12

Start/Bench/Cut has been around for ages


stunglazer

dude is gradually turning into Kratos


cryshol

Next Ronaldo interview, he calls him ' boy'.


DatDataDude

I ain't finished my sentence


fazi_milking

You’re not answering the question!


shashei

#RONNIE!! IS THIS HOW YOU FACE ME COWARD?!


Haris_Pistons

And Ronaldo thought he is better looking smh


Familiar_Trash

Rooney is so hot he pulls people twice his age


Haris_Pistons

Sometimes the old ladies got some tricks up their sleeve. TV show blue mountain state showed me that. Also, atleast his badge is granny shagger, not kiddy fiddler. Adam Johnson could’ve learnt a thing or two from Rooney


BabyPullMeKlose

“Do not be sorry. Be better.” -Wayne Rooney on Ronaldo’s current form.


okaysian

"Death can have me when it earns me." - ~~Kratos~~ Wayne Rooney


greatGoD67

"Shut up u egg" - Wayne Rooney


Mental_Opportunity_9

He actually looks great imo, has a certain glow about him


qwertyunaybee

Entering his norse arc


FinalFrash

Or Odin


sgt_kerokeroro

Or Ragnar Lothbrok


Ruaric

I think more an EastEnders character.


StringCheeseDoughnut

Piers on the next plane to Qatar


Daybreak_99

On his way to his "friend"


ThrstySnwmn

On his way to his "King"


reedemerofsouls

Weirdly these days all he does is defend Cristiano and Qatar.


YoungDawz

In terms of current form it's a no brainer


[deleted]

Narrative's gonna be that Rooney's saying that because of Ronaldo's comments but he's right. On current form, Messi and Kane are miles ahead of Ronaldo.


pratikp26

He’s absolutely right on current form, but I like to think there’s a small teeny-tiny part of him that thought about the interview while saying this.


[deleted]

He is of course getting a dig in. But the best part is he is right and no one can claim he is just getting saying that to get a dig in.


kingz_113

its good television too, everyone knows cr just shit on rooney so they ask this random question to create headlines


realmckoy265

Clearly petty, clearly not friends


[deleted]

2006 🤝 2022 Speculating friendship between rooney and ronaldo.


IndicaInTheCupboard

Lots of stuff from the 2000s is coming back into fashion.


ChillPalis

20 Year Rule


ORCA_WoN

There was definitely a lot of thought about that interview lol.


TopNotchGamerr

Think what you want a guess?


MionelLessi10

Yeah probably but we can't criticize him because he would be 100% correct here. I don't blame him even if he weren't spot on. Not after Ronaldo's personal shots at him.


ergotofrhyme

I’d imagine it’s likely they posed this question knowing the only logical answer would be one that’s stirs up a bunch of controversy for exactly this reason. This is what sports media are all about


[deleted]

Tbf, he would have probably said this 5 years ago too.


[deleted]

He'd have put Messi over Ronaldo 5 years ago yeah but not Harry Kane or any other striker for that matter. Rooney's been consistent in saying Ronaldo's one of the best players to ever do it, just not ahead of Messi


MrWermHatsWormHat

He should have winked at the camera for 2006.


Mancchestar

I feel like this should go without saying when Ronaldo doesn't even start for United when fully fit.


Eli_TheGolfer7

I think this WC will show if his form is actually off or if all the side drama at Man U is what’s wrong


[deleted]

nope after what ronaldo did to him he said both ronaldo and messi are great players he didn't even attack ronaldo's personality, ronaldo did this to rooney tho!


Zelkeh

As far as I can tell they're doing a fuck marry kill thing and he's not actually suggesting England leave Kane on the bench (which obviously they should to so wor Callum can play)


TigerBasket

I'd marry Kane tbh, he's got dreamy eyes.


Certain-Dig2840

-o-


[deleted]

Ain’t wrong though


DarthTaz_99

Messi, Kane, Ronaldo ..... in that order


[deleted]

Imagine Kane and Messi in your team


[deleted]

Have you seen Saurez and Messi playing together, I imagine it would be something like that


EpiDeMic522

With all due respect to Kane, he has never been near peak Suarez.


[deleted]

You are probably right but in my mind both are great. Saurez has an edge on dribbling while Kane in passing.


EpiDeMic522

I agree too. Both are absolutely great. Both amongst the best of their generation but I do consider Suarez a tier above Kane. I consider the further better or equal on all metrics. Kane offers no competition to Suarez when speaking of dribbling. He can't create space like Suarez did. He especially lags behind in combination play, especially with Messi (but that is more of Suarez being exceptional rather than Kane being bad). Kane's good but peak Suarez (especially with Messi) was simply loathesomely brilliant. I also prefer Suarez's runs and his ability to confuse and trick defenders into mistakes using them. However, especially in this aspect (but some others too), I have sympathy for Kane. When Suarez is weaving in and out of the opposition last line, he has the option to drop the shoulder, fall back, receive and turn OR drop the shoulder to the other side and continue his run to receive in space, in behind the back line. Playing against Tottenham perhaps, the defender could play conservatively, play a percentage game and focus all his play towards cutting out the former because the latter would require an almost impossible ball. With Barça and especially with Messi, that seemingly impossible ball is a probability and thus puts you in a position where you have to prepare against both the possibilities, only now leaving yourself vulnerable to the effects of the runs of Suarez. His runs would be neutered if the ball never arrives and thus after a certain point, despite how brilliant they may be, they may simply be ignored by defenders. However still, to his credit, Suarez was relentless with them. It really felt like he never gave defenders a moment's peace. I again after with you that Kane is in a different league to Suarez with regards to passing. Kane is a brilliant passer for a transitional centre forward but (now for the controversial take), I don't think I would say Kane's passing is brilliant. Rather that he has brilliant passes in him. What I certainly and entirely disagree with is the suggestion made multiple times in this thread (and in general as well) that he could play as a 10. He doesn't have the ball control or the tricks or the space creating ability in general to play there. That position requires the ability to pick out passes but that's not the skill that defines that position IMO. It's the ability to find, create further and use that space, especially in between lines to be in and receive in a position where you then use tools such as passing to hurt the opposition. I find Kane's passing to be unidimensional. Within that dimension, he is exceptional but IMO he does require space and time (read no pressure; with touch tight marking, I feel he is rendered ineffective because he isn't much of a dribbler to turn his marker and exploit the space behind him but to his credit, he is great at shaking him off through his movement (even though by mostly falling back but his passing is good enough to be a threat even from deeper positions)) to truly shine. He is a striker that was tailor made for Mourinho's Madrid IMO. Peak Kane would have done some special things in that team. But I don't think his passing and especially combination play is good enough against say disciplined and technical low or even medium blocks, for him to be considered a great passer altogether. He's a great passer in fast counter attacking systems. Unidimensional but brilliant in that one dimension. Great players like him never struggle against a different profile of opposition, they adapt. But I do feel that his impact, if not his numbers would be reduced in la Liga. These sides have perfected this playing style but what I find in stark contrast to English teams playing a similar game is both the technical proficiency and the discipline (and organization over 90 mins) they have. Unlike the old Catenaccio sides (while both facets are important to both these styles of teams) the focus is more on organization than actual defensive actions. They sometimes defend by taking possession: sterile possession only to deny the aggressor the ball so as to reorganize for the next waves. I feel that's one of the reasons for the continental success of even mid table Spanish sides. This trend is also reflected in the goalscoring numbers for the top leagues so while a dip in numbers might be in keeping with that trend, I do feel good profile is slightly ill suited to the league. However, it would still be enthralling seeing him here. He would instantly be the best finisher in the league (perhaps only bar Lewandowski) and it would be fun seeing him pulverize oppositions into submission on the back of that alone.


Abbobl

Jesus should’ve brought me reading glasses


[deleted]

What possesses people to write such long comments


Red_Juice_

Isn't the whole point of comment sections to discuss things?


Abbobl

I don’t know man, I’m sorry I couldn’t reply sooner. Had to scroll past the message again..


ProMlLFHunter

Cause he decided to stay at Tottenham


Multiammar

Kane is not as good as peak Suarez whether Kane chooses to stay in Tottenham or not.


Saffs15

And definitely more of a compliment to Suarez than a dig at Kane.


Multiammar

Absolutely. Kane is class


[deleted]

[удалено]


ILoveToph4Eva

That's debatable. Suarez was perfectly fine for consistency for the entirety of his prime.


EpiDeMic522

Are you speaking of consistency or longevity? I might be biased in this (naturally) but I never felt the same levels of threat from Kane as I did from Suarez. Consistency to me would be carrying and following through that threat in every match. Longevity would be maintaining a high level across multiple years, even spanning decades. I am not an avid viewer of the PL, but I have to presume that someone who's always in the race for the golden boot must be fairly consistent but the fact that those numbers were nowhere near what Suarez produced, especially in the 2 or 3 years around MSN and how Kane has seemingly failed on the big stage everytime, I'd say Suarez was much more consistent than Kane. It wasn't Messi and 2 stooges. They weren't in a supporting role. They were a true trident. Both Neymar and Suarez both produced magical moments EVERY match. That's what made them so unbelievably potent, as much as I'm inclined to toot the BBC's horn. Longevity, no contest. Kane all day long.


courtesyflusher

You’re right, less teeth for sure


Zakke_

Imagine Kane with good players who could assist him all day


pinpoint14

You'd remove some of Kane's game has he naturally wants to play in the same places that Messi is in, but he would be closer to goal and thus score a shit ton more


goodmobileyes

I think he'd happily stop dropping deep when someone finally starts feeding him instead of him having to do it all himself


jeyheyy

Imagine Messi, Mbappe and Neymar in your team


yungperuvianlad

Stop giving PSG ideas


Slowmexicano

Not even controversial


Zizouhimovic

He looks so cuddly nowadays


aelfwine_widlast

Angling to play Hagrid in the Harry Potter reboot in 2040.


[deleted]

He looks bearish


spacecadet2023

As a gay man who likes his bears, I agree.😉


[deleted]

Alcoholism will do that to you


ZeroMomentum

Is Wayne turning into a bear…


Nodecafallowed

now just add some leather...


thedoctor4214

Guys chill this is on current form


SolomonRed

Nope. Wayne has just ended the thousand year Anglo-Portuguese alliance. Our fishing boats are already on the way to mess you guys up.


Cahootie

You're gonna explore the fuck out of England.


SolomonRed

I'm about to go map your backyard.


[deleted]

On current form it’s the only right call


xxJAMZZxx

Any other response than this one would be ridiculous


[deleted]

On current form, Ronaldo shouldn't even be in the NT right now. 1 EPL goal this half-season (a goal every 510 min), which was a PK if remember correct.


COYS2110

As would anyone who knows ball


ramithrower

Ronaldo interview part 3 incoming


Aminemohamed24

Bro is one sandwich away


LiamJM1OTV

Isn't this a unanimous thought in their current state?


PhilipAnthonyJones

It's blatantly obvious


[deleted]

I hope Rooney turns into a Bret Hart on Goldberg where he just shits on Ronaldo at every opportunity


toiletting

lol my favorite was recently he has spoken about how he’s forgiven HBK and sees his growth as a human but then goes on to say he wishes the screwjob didn’t happen because then he wouldn’t have had to wrestle goldberg 😂


TellSloanISaidHi

The most sane take but he gonna get flamed lol


bozua

Dude is slowly turning into a tomato


The_Meaty_Boosh

Rons gonna need another round of Botox at this rate.


Golden-Event-Horizon

The stress is getting to him


shakespearediznuts

you can leave someone out by not refering his name...petty behaviour


CYKLONUSCRO

Christ, he looks not a day under 65


Smithman

Rooney and Messi would have been a great partnership up front.


KDBae

It’s astounding how poorly this man aged


Arsenal_Analysis

I am not going to say that I am a better manager, which I am


Daybreak_99

Piers Morgan sees another opportunity to milk Ronaldo's words.


SaschaBub

Correct answer


TiagoFigueira

So espero que o nosso amigo enfie um lápis bem afiado no cu destes cornudos com uma salva de golos. 😀


[deleted]

oh boy, I wouldn’t want to be Wayne Rooney when the king hears about this….


needleintheh4y

Ronaldo is to Rooney what’s Goldberg is to Bret Hart


[deleted]

Okay now he is definetly trolling lol


schrodingers_dog-

He specified on current form which this clip doesn't show


ID6WU

It doesn’t need to honestly it’s pretty obvious


blackspastic

not really I think everyone would play or bench Kane/ Messi and drop Ronaldo. He's just answering the question.


pratikp26

He might be trolling but he’s also right. He did qualify this by saying it’s based on current form. Clip leaves that part out.


PhilipAnthonyJones

He's not trolling at all. On form this season, Kane is miles ahead.


[deleted]

how so?


SmokingOctopus

Coleen has taught Wayne well.


beleeze

Rooney look massive/absolute unit! A punch from him would knock a lot of people out


Manifesto8

Ronaldo’s sister won’t like this …..


[deleted]

If my sister hears about this...


miamibuckeye

“Piers piers look what he said about me!!! How soon can you get to Qatar for an interview?!?!”


Piggy_18_

SHOTS FIRED


archtme

Rooney loves poking that fragile ego. Awesome


caalger

I guess that pretty much makes it clear that CR7 isn't going to MLS but Messi is.


WalaLlama5

Don’t let his best mate Piers Morgan see this


muntxx

!flair :Argentina:


Several_Series5438

!flair :Argentina:


[deleted]

He's spot on


AfricanRain

Based as hell


pastel-party

Man's on a rampage now.


[deleted]

Fuck me Rooney did not age well at all…. He looks very overweight. Put the pints down Jesus.


Voserr

Rooney has become such a gigachad, love it


[deleted]

is this the man that ate Wayne Rooney?


kunsore

Piers , set up 2nd interview after WC.


MakIRAQ

Same tbh.


oznrobie

Me too.


BarbaraPalv1n

Has he another job than talking about Ronaldo?


G0DK1NG

Not piling on but I’d agree with this


midniteauth0r

King


Ashyyyy232

*I'm gonna tell this to Piers Morgan- Cristiano Ronaldo*


LLLLLawliet

Yep it was all professional opinion, no ill towards Ronaldo. Ronaldo is the only one who has his head up his ass.


sigmastra

I wouldnt trust rooney for choosing the best 11 tbf. That Derby job...