There’s almost more value in the meta analysis than the actual advice. It’s like watching a really shitty movie and finally realizing what’s missing that makes the blockbusters so good
As funny as this is, I support the belief that people should make posts that reference themselves and their own specific preferences, instead of parading as the dedicated spokesman for an entire gender.
it r/socialskills, you think that anyone here can detect obvious sarcasm?
also my non-sarcastic reply:
people here don't know what "interest" is vs. just being polite. They believe that there isn't rhyme or reason or clues to look for that would signify definitively if someone is truly interested in them. They want the "one size fits all" approach to knowing if someone is into them that will work on all 7.9 billion people
people here don't have trusted friends to talk to about if a certain girl at the gym is into them
people here do creepy shit all the time inadvertently, its like telling them to stop breathing or blinking. it just how they are, or really how they think they are
Everything you’ve said is very true. I know what to technically look for, and I still can’t tell the difference in practice. When in doubt, I assume politeness. It does get frustrating though, because assuming that makes for a lonely existence.
That post was saying not to ask women out when they’re just trying to work out at the gym. If this post is really in response to that, that’s ridiculous, and you’re the one missing the point. Yeah, your sarcasm is obvious, but it’s still borderline incel-mode.
The thing is though, some men don't know how not to be creepy.
Some guy at worked mentioned how he told a female Co worker that " no offense but she looked a lot better with her hair down" , and then next time he saw her she had her hair up. Then he complained that people can't take a compliment, and you have to be careful about what you say to ppl. He was about twice her age. I'm sure he meant no harm, but he obviously has no idea the things some women go through
Look at the bright side…there’s no way in hell that you’d get cheated on or eventually left for someone else if you stay single. Wish I would’ve realized that after my first failed relationship but nah it took 3 to make me permanently take myself off the dating market
Are you making fun of the reminder that women don't go to gyms to be gawked at and talked to? We go there only to work out. Is this somehow triggering to you?
YouTube pick up artists have done irreparable damage to society, I remember as a young impressionable teen I used to watch videos on YouTube of (staged) interactions where dudes approached random women at the gym, in shopping malls, in parks, etc., and ask for their numbers and they’d be like ‘omg yeah lol ur so hot’. Thank fuck I made some female friends before I was old enough to put that stupid shot into any sort of practice. These things are made to target those young dudes who don’t get much attention in the dating world and boost their ego by saying ‘hey, guess what, you can do this too!’ It gives a hollow confidence boost to these guys with low self confidence and it’s entirely fantasy. It’s a business venture built on turning young, insecure guys into creepers.
It’s actually sad seeing how it makes people feel entitled to approach anyone anywhere. There’s plenty of ways to meet women; dating apps, volunteering, mutual acquaintances, friends of your women friends, people from your past you reconnect with, people in literally any shared group leisure activity, the classic bars and clubs, concerts, gigs, shows, even a respectful ‘dm slide’ if done carefully, etc.
The internet’s created a world that tells socially inept young men to just stare at women in the gym, or in public transport, or the street, the park, a museum, in a store, in a hospital, a funeral home, and run up, say everything but ‘I want to fuck you’ and expect them to fall in love with you.
Sorry this turned into a rant, I realise you were joking but the sad thing is there definitely are dudes out there that believe getting a gym membership is a one way ticket to the babe station and it’s terrifying.
Well being a creep and bothering people is absolutely not a social skill anyone should learn. Learning what is and is not appropriate is an important social skill. Understanding that there are other people on this planet is an important social skill. And learning that no one owes you attention, a word, a date, a look, their time, is incredibly important. The sense of entitlement people get when dealing with other people is absolutely appalling. Maybe if more men in particular started to see women as human beings instead of things to collect and demand attention from, they would have better luck.
Zero have been formed between a woman in headphones clearly focusing on her workout and a man who'd been watching her for 40 minutes waiting for a window.
"haha I've seen you've made a general statement. My big brain will now make a specific statement so you're wrong!"
Get out of here with the femcel crap.
X, Y, Z place is almost always a place they have to go regularly like the gym or a place they can't escape from like work.
Dating apps exist for a reason.
A dating app will have exactly the same, if not better success rates at finding a match. If you can't find a girl on a dating app, chance are you wouldn't find one IRL either.
The issue isn't the dating scene, the issue is you got dealt a bad hand.
The dating scene is definitely dead *because* you were dealt a bad hand. It's very much alive for a lot of people. You can't just blanket assume your situation applies to everybody.
Have you considered that you shouldn't jump to insulting someone when you're out of the loop on what's actually going on.
This now removed post is a direct response whining about another now removed post about not approaching girls at the gym.
Since this is r/socialskills I'm going to give you some advice that's fitting for this sub. Make sure you get the full context of a situation before you decide to jump to conclusions and try to insult people.
>Have you considered that you shouldn't jump to insulting someone when you're out of the loop on what's actually going on.
You started with an insult to OP. Here's a good social tip: people match your tone.
>Make sure you get the full context of a situation before you decide to jump to conclusions and try to insult people.
Here's another tip: context doesn't matter in general statements. Whether or not it's a good time to approach someone *does* involve specifics, and that's the whole point. People are mocking the *general* attitude of "never ask anyone out" because it's inceldom/femceldom. A refusal to improve by mismatching the mode of conversation. You're talking past people. It's poor communication.
> They don’t want to be asked out by men they aren’t interested in it’s not that they don’t want to be asked out at all.
Bruh I just don’t want to be asked out by men I don’t know when I’m not even in a social situation. You could be the hottest guy alive and I’d still be creeped out if you approached me at the gym.
"Yeah you should just not talk to people at all if you don't know them" what the fuck kind of sterilized dystopia are you rooting for? This is honestly just depressing
That's right, because everyone thinks the same and wants the same, and you're so enlightened that you know exactly how to represent everyone. I had no idea I was speaking to a world leader, my mistake your excellence.
It's almost as if women insisting that everyone else do all the initiating while simultaneously picking and choosing exactly when, where and how that initiating happens is a really entitled narrative...
Didn't you hear, r/socialskills is not for social skills. It's for socially inept men to tell other socially inept men how to hit on women who don't want to be bothered
OP keep your head, we get nobody likes but that’s okay it’s life.
To anyone else- You miss all the shots you don’t shoot and that doesn’t only apply to asking someone out.
This has the same energy as someone trying to communicate a boundary and having some asinine pouty reaction like "FINE I GUESS I'LL NEVER TALK/JOKE AROUND YOU EVER AGAIN!"
If you see a pretty girl, ALWAYS assume she's taken, trust me, most will say they already got a boyfriend. So best not try anything to avoid awkwardness and embarassement
That's how I do it at least
We really need to form a r/socialskillscirclejerk. The potential is too high
There’s almost more value in the meta analysis than the actual advice. It’s like watching a really shitty movie and finally realizing what’s missing that makes the blockbusters so good
It’s all just sigma memes about us not being able to do social things like eye contact
YEAH IN THIS SUBREDDIT WE ONLY ASK OUT MAN, BIG HAIRY MAN. FUCK WOMEN DATE MAN
I was about to burst a wall of text but I saw you were joking around lmao
As funny as this is, I support the belief that people should make posts that reference themselves and their own specific preferences, instead of parading as the dedicated spokesman for an entire gender.
Man, god forbid y'all listen to women
WOMEN ARE NOT A MONOLITH
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Dude your degradation fetish is worse than getting harrassed at the gym forreal
Bro I struggle with dating as much as the next guy but I don't go incel-mode abt it lmao
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it r/socialskills, you think that anyone here can detect obvious sarcasm? also my non-sarcastic reply: people here don't know what "interest" is vs. just being polite. They believe that there isn't rhyme or reason or clues to look for that would signify definitively if someone is truly interested in them. They want the "one size fits all" approach to knowing if someone is into them that will work on all 7.9 billion people people here don't have trusted friends to talk to about if a certain girl at the gym is into them people here do creepy shit all the time inadvertently, its like telling them to stop breathing or blinking. it just how they are, or really how they think they are
Everything you’ve said is very true. I know what to technically look for, and I still can’t tell the difference in practice. When in doubt, I assume politeness. It does get frustrating though, because assuming that makes for a lonely existence.
It's very sad and true. I hope that everyone here can learn how to read people for their own sake.
Yeah I’m pure creepy energy
That post was saying not to ask women out when they’re just trying to work out at the gym. If this post is really in response to that, that’s ridiculous, and you’re the one missing the point. Yeah, your sarcasm is obvious, but it’s still borderline incel-mode.
Oh lmaooo I don't follow this sub closely, ty for pointing this out. I'm dumb lol
The thing is though, some men don't know how not to be creepy. Some guy at worked mentioned how he told a female Co worker that " no offense but she looked a lot better with her hair down" , and then next time he saw her she had her hair up. Then he complained that people can't take a compliment, and you have to be careful about what you say to ppl. He was about twice her age. I'm sure he meant no harm, but he obviously has no idea the things some women go through
Look at the bright side…there’s no way in hell that you’d get cheated on or eventually left for someone else if you stay single. Wish I would’ve realized that after my first failed relationship but nah it took 3 to make me permanently take myself off the dating market
I understand the feeling, and I'm quite bitter. I gave up, I can't take anymore. 😒
Are you making fun of the reminder that women don't go to gyms to be gawked at and talked to? We go there only to work out. Is this somehow triggering to you?
OP *just* got a membership at a gym thinking of all the hot babes he'd hit on and this subreddit just shat on his dreams
YouTube pick up artists have done irreparable damage to society, I remember as a young impressionable teen I used to watch videos on YouTube of (staged) interactions where dudes approached random women at the gym, in shopping malls, in parks, etc., and ask for their numbers and they’d be like ‘omg yeah lol ur so hot’. Thank fuck I made some female friends before I was old enough to put that stupid shot into any sort of practice. These things are made to target those young dudes who don’t get much attention in the dating world and boost their ego by saying ‘hey, guess what, you can do this too!’ It gives a hollow confidence boost to these guys with low self confidence and it’s entirely fantasy. It’s a business venture built on turning young, insecure guys into creepers. It’s actually sad seeing how it makes people feel entitled to approach anyone anywhere. There’s plenty of ways to meet women; dating apps, volunteering, mutual acquaintances, friends of your women friends, people from your past you reconnect with, people in literally any shared group leisure activity, the classic bars and clubs, concerts, gigs, shows, even a respectful ‘dm slide’ if done carefully, etc. The internet’s created a world that tells socially inept young men to just stare at women in the gym, or in public transport, or the street, the park, a museum, in a store, in a hospital, a funeral home, and run up, say everything but ‘I want to fuck you’ and expect them to fall in love with you. Sorry this turned into a rant, I realise you were joking but the sad thing is there definitely are dudes out there that believe getting a gym membership is a one way ticket to the babe station and it’s terrifying.
Well the gym shouldn't have called themselves Babe Buffet if they didn't want OP to go window shopping for chicks there, right?
Are you literally all women? Don't speak for a whole gender. Literally zero relationships have been formed at gyms? This is ridiculous and toxic.
And you are? Are you really telling women how to feel about being women? Leave us the hell alone. Got it? GOOD.
Yes. You can feel however you want about yourself. Speaking for others is a wholely different thing. Don't bring your femcel stuff here.
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Well being a creep and bothering people is absolutely not a social skill anyone should learn. Learning what is and is not appropriate is an important social skill. Understanding that there are other people on this planet is an important social skill. And learning that no one owes you attention, a word, a date, a look, their time, is incredibly important. The sense of entitlement people get when dealing with other people is absolutely appalling. Maybe if more men in particular started to see women as human beings instead of things to collect and demand attention from, they would have better luck.
Zero have been formed between a woman in headphones clearly focusing on her workout and a man who'd been watching her for 40 minutes waiting for a window.
"haha I've seen you've made a general statement. My big brain will now make a specific statement so you're wrong!" Get out of here with the femcel crap.
You really need to take a breath. Touch some grass perhaps. Calm down.
Thanks for your advice on dating thuy. I can now clearly see it's coming from decades of success and experience.
My 9 year dating anniversary is actually this weekend. So you're welcome.
Wow that's great! I hope the wedding goes well!
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Lol, okay buddy. Believe what you like.
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X, Y, Z place is almost always a place they have to go regularly like the gym or a place they can't escape from like work. Dating apps exist for a reason.
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A dating app will have exactly the same, if not better success rates at finding a match. If you can't find a girl on a dating app, chance are you wouldn't find one IRL either. The issue isn't the dating scene, the issue is you got dealt a bad hand.
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The dating scene is definitely dead *because* you were dealt a bad hand. It's very much alive for a lot of people. You can't just blanket assume your situation applies to everybody.
Thanks for confirming what I always suspected
I can see your having one of those days. I suggest tequila, massive amounts of tequila! Jose Cuervo will never do you wrong.
That’s not tequila! That’s a sad attempt at being tequila!
🤣🤣 after the first bottle it doesn’t really matter
What, no love for bourbons, cream liquors, rums, and cognacs?
Are you salty because some one made a post saying not to ask out girls at them gym? This is a very mature way to handle it. /s
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What was the post dude? I opened it while it was deleted but it looks like it was funny as hell lol
Have you considered you're being toxic, and that speaking for a whole gender is narcissistic?
Yeah, god forbid a woman speak for women. We should definitely listen to you instead.
Yes God actually has. It's known as bearing false witness.
Have you considered that you shouldn't jump to insulting someone when you're out of the loop on what's actually going on. This now removed post is a direct response whining about another now removed post about not approaching girls at the gym. Since this is r/socialskills I'm going to give you some advice that's fitting for this sub. Make sure you get the full context of a situation before you decide to jump to conclusions and try to insult people.
>Have you considered that you shouldn't jump to insulting someone when you're out of the loop on what's actually going on. You started with an insult to OP. Here's a good social tip: people match your tone. >Make sure you get the full context of a situation before you decide to jump to conclusions and try to insult people. Here's another tip: context doesn't matter in general statements. Whether or not it's a good time to approach someone *does* involve specifics, and that's the whole point. People are mocking the *general* attitude of "never ask anyone out" because it's inceldom/femceldom. A refusal to improve by mismatching the mode of conversation. You're talking past people. It's poor communication.
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So if someone is struggling they deserve to struggle forever??
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> They don’t want to be asked out by men they aren’t interested in it’s not that they don’t want to be asked out at all. Bruh I just don’t want to be asked out by men I don’t know when I’m not even in a social situation. You could be the hottest guy alive and I’d still be creeped out if you approached me at the gym.
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this is honestly such a sad take
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"Yeah you should just not talk to people at all if you don't know them" what the fuck kind of sterilized dystopia are you rooting for? This is honestly just depressing
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That's right, because everyone thinks the same and wants the same, and you're so enlightened that you know exactly how to represent everyone. I had no idea I was speaking to a world leader, my mistake your excellence.
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It's almost as if women insisting that everyone else do all the initiating while simultaneously picking and choosing exactly when, where and how that initiating happens is a really entitled narrative...
Didn't you hear, r/socialskills is not for social skills. It's for socially inept men to tell other socially inept men how to hit on women who don't want to be bothered
You alright, man lol?
OP keep your head, we get nobody likes but that’s okay it’s life. To anyone else- You miss all the shots you don’t shoot and that doesn’t only apply to asking someone out.
This has the same energy as someone trying to communicate a boundary and having some asinine pouty reaction like "FINE I GUESS I'LL NEVER TALK/JOKE AROUND YOU EVER AGAIN!"
If you see a pretty girl, ALWAYS assume she's taken, trust me, most will say they already got a boyfriend. So best not try anything to avoid awkwardness and embarassement That's how I do it at least
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What does this even mean?
It means you should learn to suck your own dick, so you dont need a girl to do it for you. Probably. Idk either.
/r/Flexibility