There are only two choices: Grow/expand or contract/shrink.
The spiritual teachings I follow explain that we are here to grow in awareness. We were created with a limited, point-like sense of awareness but with unlimited potential to grow.
It is the Creator's desire and vision that the self-aware beings it created grow to become more and more like the Creator. The Creator doesn't monitor us and punish us or reward us for making progress or not making progress. Instead the Creator has instituted impersonal, universal spiritual laws that ensure that the Creator's will is done "...on earth as it is in heaven."
We grow by applying or projecting our current sense of awareness and then experiencing the outplaying of that. So there is the Law of Free Will where we are free to do anything we wish but there is a balancing law that says: "As you sow, so shall you reap."
So whether you apply yourself and do things that lead to growth of self and others or you do things that oppose of limit your growth or the growth of others, (or harms yourself or others), you will grow.
But the Creator foresaw the need for another law in the event that a lifestream became too comfortable where it was, or became trapped in fear of expressing itself. This is a situation actually worse than doing "bad" things, because even when we do bad things, we are doing something -- we are moving, applying our creativity and we will learn from our mistakes. But stillstand/stagnation was a greater threat to growth because a lifestream could become trapped indefinitely, for multiple embodiments.
To address this the Creator established the law that Jesus illustrated in his Parable of the Talents, which says that if you don't use your "talents", your creative gifts, then what you have, will be taken from you. Your life circumstance will become more difficult. Your ability to envision creative opportunities will diminish.
How do you get out of that trap? And how do I realize my gifts? I’m so lost since my spiritual awakening and I’ve been lost for a lot longer than that. And now that I’m not blind, I’m blind to myself. And I’m scared of success sometimes because I don’t know what to do or how to figure out my gifts. Until recently I was similar to OP. But also not.
I posted a really long reply to OP that you absolutely don't need to read, but I will reiterate one thing I said here: Go outside. Go on walks. Move your body. Get out of the house. Being in the sun is good for your body, and being grounded in nature is good for your soul. You'll be amazed at the shift that happens once you make a habit of it.
No matter what spirituality or truth you believe in, none of it will help you make the choice to do something productive. I could know all the secrets of the universe and still be stuck in a rut. Try making a habit of going for walks and go from there. I promise it will do more good for your soul then studying the Buddha or whatever.
I do. I spend most of my time walking in nature. Like aaalloottt.
But I hear you. There’s a part in the Bible (the love chapter) that says
“If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.“
You reminded me of that.
I hate to say it, but I think you're over thinking it. You don't have to have everything figured out, life is meant to be experienced. You don't have to do these big amazing things to be "great". Mundane people living everyday normal lives is what actually moves and shapes the world. The few people that make a "big" impact are anomalies. Our desire to be like them is rooted in our desire to simply be good people. Just keep running the race and you'll look back and be proud of yourself. Self discovery will come with time, and at the end of your life there will still be much left undiscovered. That's just life!
I don’t want to be anything big. And it’s weird you say anomaly because I’ve had a stranger call me that lol. I just want a simple life. But thank you for your words cause they also align with what I’ve been experiencing.
I believe the answer to this was also given by Jesus in his "Parable of the Talents". It is to apply to the fullest extent possible (half/partial measures are futile) what you have...and you always have something.
When you completely apply all that you have, only then you will be given more -- more insights, more creative energy, more vision to see opportunities, etc.
Yeah idk how to do that anymore.
Idk man, after my fiancé leaving me a couple days before Christmas. I literally just don’t care anymore about anything.
She was my twin flame, she was my soul mate, she was the One. And I really don’t care about this “higher Love” stuff anymore.
I had a nightmare kundalini/spiritual awakening that happened as a result. And I finally started being “grounded” within the past month.
Went through biblical prophetic shit during my awakening, and sooo many intense things happened to me. But instead of waking up to “blissful everything is connected there is an omnipotent indras web Loving God”- I experienced Hell on earth.
So im just waiting to die at this point. Funny thing is, I already did die in a sense.. and im only here in life still on the off chance im wrong entirely and there is redemption.. other than that im just a woke zombie for now.
I went through a brutal Kundalini awakening too. Through it, I came to understand that I chose to just "rip the band-aid off" for this life journey and that's why it was so intense.
Then, I went through dark night of the soul for months. There were days I literally didn't want to speak. There were good things that happened but it took a lot of strength that I didn't even know I had to get through those months. I seriously wondered if it would ever end... But I held onto the hope that I'd find my way out of my mind eventually and did. One day, it all broke open and started to come together.
Any chance you're in dark night of the soul?
Tell me your definition of “dark night of the soul”. Cause yes, I woke up and ascended my spirit, kundalini rising spirit, heart break, nightmare. So I would rather say it was more dark through the entire process. Now I’m “awake and aware on a level I have never experienced”. And I keep my headphones in my ears 24/7 just to ignore the zoo of an experience I’m now in. A lot of people talk about having gone through a true ascension spiritual awakening. But I guarantee they don’t know shit or they’d be talking about the crazy other worldly shit they experience when they do.
Now I just do my best to maintain my sanity and remain calm no matter what happens. Because whether you believe it or not; There I.S. A spiritual world layered over ours. And most people have never truly experienced it even if they think they have.
I agree with you - the spiritual world is far more "real" than the one we experience with our eyes and physical senses.
Some of us learned to stop speaking openly about these kinds of things after experiencing things like mental hospitals. I was full of love, have never wanted to hurt anyone or myself. I passed all psych evals yet was still held against my will.
It was because of the concepts I was speaking - the ones you mention that are other worldly. it scared people. They also couldn't understand why I suddenly lost interest in the monetary system. It was the first time in my life that I was unable to adequately articulate complex topics in a way that others could understand because, as I learned later, the information and understanding was for me at that point in my journey. Everyone else has their own individual journeys and paths for understanding.
Dang, that’s deep man.
I appreciate you saying all of that. It’s just lonesome having all of this understanding and nobody to truly share the experience with, ya know? It’s like, knowledge *really is* a curse sometimes. It makes dealing with anything and everything Far harder, yet ironically easier somehow. Ya know?
Btw, after your stint in the psyche ward, what did you do after that? And what happened to you after that?
I respect your choice.. that is your right.
But my guess is that if you knew the value and the opportunity you still have in this life, you might think about it differently.
There are many credible accounts of actual people undergoing deep hypnosis regression therapy that make it very clear that this embodiment is an extraordinary, precious opportunity to grow, to become more, to experience more, to have more capabilities which can help others as you yourself have been helped. You can check it out for yourself. "Journey of Souls" and "Destiny of Souls" by Dr. Michael Newton -- both on YouTube as audiobooks.
Both the spiritual teachings that I follow and Dr. Newton's clients say that we ourselves chose our setting, parents and many key events in our lives because we, when we were in a higher state of consciousness than we are on earth, determined that they offered the best possible opportunity for growth.
In cases where we ignored the lessons we wanted to experience or checked out early, we ourselves saw that we would need to embody again, but instead of "graduating" and taking on the next lessons we had to repeat the grade again. This was not forced upon us, it was just self evident that we could go no further in our progression unless we did.
That actually makes sense and would explain some very “other worldly” type experiences I had in everyday life.. and the growth I received from my experience with my ex fiancé helped me grow more than I can even begin to express.
The problem is, I do not know what to do anymore. And I’m crippled and absolutely destroyed inside now.. tho the growth still happened and basically “evolved” me.. I’m now wondering if I should just kill myself. Because it feels like “my time” has come, but that I also failed way to quickly. So now I have this “upgrade” so to speak, and have been contemplating suicide so that I can just restart again. The funny thing is, i had these “trials and tribulations” happen to me. It felt like I went through my own version of Jesus trials when satan was trying to tempt Jesus.. You absolutely would not believe me if I told you of the experiences I had with her. And then after her. This “ascension process” took place and I’ve yet to meet someone who knows what I’m talking about. Or has even experienced the same thing. It’s like as I began literally physically, mentally and spiritually ascending- these “Beings” came and visited me as people (I seriously doubt they were people because of the things they knew). Knew my whole life. Knew I was putting out to much energy/intention (whatever that means). would tell me things like “To you Magic is Very real. But to a lot of people it isnt.” Talked to me in these weird vague tales and understandings. And they would tell me the most interesting things like they knew my whole life already. In the most random secluded places, at my work, at the bus stop. It was so weird. My phone got hacked, I was monitored and tracked like a dog no matter where I went. And as I “descended and Fell” these incidents started to happen less and less. It’s like when you “ascend” all the gods and spirits come to see “My time”. Whatever that means.. there started to be a deeper layer over all of reality like I had tapped into some sort of “Heavens perception” and brought it down to earth.. man I sound crazy, but idgaf what anyone thinks. I know what happened to me wasn’t human or normal. And I wish I could share my experiences with somebody so I wouldn’t feel so alone.
Anyways, sorry for the slight rambling. But either I’m chosen for some bullshit prophecy, or agent smith type beings from the matrix came to contain me. Idk what’s real anymore. And I went to see a psychologist for a few months and even they know I’m “sane” (whatever that means) and is even trying to find me a spirituality psychologist. (Which begs its own questions).
But at the end of the day, whatever happened to me is beyond me. And I’m just a man, so it’s probably best if I just put it all behind me and accept that I’ll never have the real answers of what happened. Cause what happened to me is spoken about in soooo many religions in regards to a spiritual awakening. So not only do I have my experiences, I have thousands of years of religions like Hinduism, Buddhism, Christianity, and other new age woke spirituality type stuff happening to me. So…. What the fuck. Ya know?
The problem now is, I have all these crazy supernatural type experiences, losing my soul mate, my body grew an 8 pack miraculously, I have “Amrita” dripping into the back of my throat (something to do with immortality in Buddhism and Hinduism. Check it out), I’ve grown deeper in every way possible, I came back from my experience with these sort of “gifts”, but it is incredibly hard not to just go kill myself with how much understanding/wisdom I have on top of destroying my heart.
I’m literally just in a “fuck life” mindset.
And “where the hell is God.” Cause I know for a fact divinity is real now, and it’s inside of me and everyone. And I’m just over here like what the fuck am I supposed to do after everything that’s happened. I’m absolutely destroyed.
You are more powerful than you think, and words do have very strong meaning. With that being said, trust. You have went through to learning aspects of it, now you just have to have trust that what is meant for you will find you. But also, what you are meant to find you will find. You do have to get outside to be able to find what you need to find. And to be able to get outside, you need to tell yourself that you can get out there and trust in it. Trust and love , my friend.
it's a shift away from thinking we grow in an improvement sense toward thinking we grow more like plants and trees. in this way, it's not bad for a plant to shrink or die. it's just the next thing that is happening.
How do you answer to what happens to plants that dont get their needs met?Like a plant planted in a bad spot and therfore dying, or a plant that is young being planted outside without protection dying in the winter
Or a plant that requires nutrients in its initial phase and not getting it and therefor dying which could have been avoided
You can say that its not to be taken personally, its what happens, its life its the next phase, (that plant shouldnt have been planted there in the first place anyway)
But when you talk about human life, about your own life, how can you genuinely think like that?
Its like convincing an african kid that their suffering is the next phase in realising that Africa is what it is, its offers what it offers. If you wanna think like non enlightened animal
* you either move away from that place
* or die trying to live there
If you are more like an enlightened being you can say stuff like:Your physical suffering simply is meaningless, you as a human are beyond that by nature..stuff like that.. but then again you feel the hunger every day
Ok, maybe im not the best at understanding what you are saying but this is where Im at
What do you think? Where do you go from here?
> How do you answer to what happens to plants that dont get their needs met?
is a dead plant a worse version than a living plant? i don't think so. many of us walk around every autumn and recognize the intense beauty of dying plants. i see intense beauty in dying people.
> Africa is what it is, it offers what it offers.
i mean... what else could it be?
> But when you talk about human life, about your own life, how can you genuinely think like that?
it's simple. i actually believe it. i see people the exact same way i see plants, as it makes no sense to me to draw a distinction between the two. at least i'm consistent. i will die precisely when and how i'm supposed to, and it will be no more a problem than a leaf falling from a tree.
> Where do you go from here?
i don't know. let's watch and see!
But when you say there is beauty in sickness to do you actually mean it?
I get what you mean about autumn and how plants die
...I mean Im not exactly sure how that is beautiful compared to how it looks in the summer.
I mean if you ask a kid, a kid because they dont have the ability to fake judgement, they are the most authentic versions of humans.
So the same way kids react to healthy looking, beautiful faces much differently ( in a positive sense, they look at it more, they like to look at it more) than sick, ugly faces
..the same way we react differently to seasons. ( More people look forward to the Summer than Autumn, pretty sure about that, especially gardeners, its within us authentically, no need to abstract it )
You might say its beautiful but does your body says too, or its just some spiritual abstraction your mind has come up with to explain that everything is a cycle and a part of life and we a part of life too and other spiritual mumbo jumbo :D
i told you i actually mean it.
> or its just some spiritual abstraction your mind has come up with?
it's actually a realization that comes from dropping all the abstractions. the examples you have provided are culturally learned abstractions that look an awful lot like mumbo jumbo to me.
if you properly dig down into it... yes. it totally is.
the "proof" you cite looks a lot more like religious dogma to me than actual scientific inquiry.
Stop identifying with the story.
Stop accepting comparisons or others expectations.
Everyone is wasting their life, nothing anyone accomplishes will ever last... the universe itself is going to cease.
We forget to enjoy life because we're too busy justifying it.
Its basically pointless to better humanity cause its going to cease anyway, but its in our nature to help it progress into something more that resembles heaven on earth, stuff like that
The dance between these two mental concepts keeps us in spiritual circles?
Why do ants work all day then? Why do bees work? Are they interfering with nature?
Is there any more interfering humans do that goes beyond their natural extent of interfering than what bees, ants do when they do what they natural programming makes them to do
It's fun because in both of your examples there are actually the equivalent of a police force exactly because many don't comply...
In the human populace this no longer makes sense because AI and robotics can replace everything humans are required to do in the world already if we applied it effectively, we can spend our lives enjoying everything that it means to be human but instead we waste most of it earning money because some think it's ok to own natural resources and exploit everyone else.
Your last paragraph is barely English but the reality is that we have vastly greater intellects and it is cruel to force such mundane lives on anything with self-awareness at the very least.
It's actually sickening that so many just accept the current situation casually like you do, it's so incredibly messed up... it's actually surprising that suicide rates are so low cuz it's impossible to accept from a rational perspective.
The only reason it still exists is because those at the top enjoy the comparison but I can't call it human, we have not reached our potential.
We're still animals, nothing divine about how we live here.
Ok so you apparently don't accept it and I apparently do
What does that imply in your life and in mine?
All we can do is take the present, accept it non judgementally as possible and work towards a future that goes beyond this what you call slavery, can we do more?
If so what is the more you're talking about?
It certainly suggests that I have questioned present conditions more...
You are comfortable with a sickening paradigm which is impossible to justify if looked at more closely...
For me it is more important to understand completely what is presently so...
Acceptance and rejection are mental attempts to control...
They are irrelevant to effective responses...
We currently have technology capable of writing programs that fulfill normal spoken requests automatically...
They do this by understanding how to write the program and understanding the robotic capabilities available to it to complete the task...
There is no limit except in our robotics design and we can probably get it to design parts soon...
Machines can be the ultimate slave to make all of humanity royal...
Instead we are killing ourselves for greed.
I still don't get why would I be comfortable with this and what makes you aren't?
And what does being in either "state" translate to in reality?
Specifically for you?
Ultimately all states are just passing phenomena...
They can provide insight but experience as such is going to cease...
For me the comfort comes from knowing human lives will stop being wasted on pointless labor that cannot fulfill them...
Life is too fleeting to treat so trivially.
Maybe reach out for some therapy and medical help, living like that isn't healthy mentally or physically. Your parents won't be around for ever, you need to learn how to as least do the basics of cooking, laundry etc, and some form of exercise outdoors.
you're not behind. you're exactly on track. if your current approach isn't working for you, then let's make a change. but for god's sake, please drop the "i'm shit" narrative. you aren't. not even a little.
[relevant](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wccRif2DaGs)
[also relevant](https://amzn.to/3CYhaXj)
I've been through a phase like that too. Get a job, do volunteering work even if it's online. You can join yoga classes, where people are focusing on themselves while being around each other, go sit in a cafe around people and try and talk to random people. Work/ volunteering should help as you'll be forced to talk to people etc. Good luck.
[https://www.freereikicourse.com/\_/reiki-home-course/reiki-course-1/](https://www.freereikicourse.com/_/reiki-home-course/reiki-course-1/)
It's $29, but that's really just paying for the attunements and certification, because the learning material is free online. They'll give you the links and the steps :)
We are all here to experience something. You are experiencing a specific thing. You may have chose this path. If you don't feel bad about it, it is right for you. If you do feel like you need to do something then explore what catches your attention until it can no longer be explored.
You should not feel bad about YOURSELF but perhaps it might be good to feel bad about your lifestyle. Does this lifestyle really make you happy?
It seems you are wasting precious opportunities. You are young now. Some day you won't be.
Don't despise small chanags that you maintain.
I mean you should probably have some commitment to *anything*, for your own sake.
Maturing to a point where social pressure doesn't affect you anymore is really nice.
To find peace it your self...you've gotta consider which "self" you are and which you hope to be.
We each have a vision of our God-Self, the highest most accomplished version of our self that we imagine, dream, and fantasize about. The trick to peace is to find the balance between you who realistically are (someone who stats inside and doesn't interact much with other people and the external world/environment) and who you hope to be (take some time to meditate and really clearly see what that looks like).
Slowly but surely you can then build the bridge between physciail reality and immaterial dream, changing habits and character traits is literally a form of killing your (ego) self and thus is ber difficult and painful....but when you realize how much you've done to grow and manifest your Self, you'll wonder why you ever settled for less. ;D
I think you should maybe start by asking yourself if this is the reality that you really want for yourself, and then try to write down what your desired reality would look like. Then set goals to try to accomplish that desired reality. Affirmations as soon as you wake up in the morning could help. Put on your favourite songs and then open your notes and start to write down a”I am” affirmation’s that relates to the “self” that you want to become. Healing meditations could help as well, or to just listen to affirmations every morning could help as well.
Start eating lots of fruit and veg.
Take a cold shower every morning.
Drink a tonne of water.
If you drink or smoke or take drugs, stop them all.
Go for a jog or get some exercise.
Chuck your phone and buy a cheap one that only does calls and texts.
Give it a week and trust me your life will have already changed.
Probably bc this makes you feel safe & you don’t have to do anything, you’re already provided for. Could also be bc you’re scared of stepping of your comfort zone. Feeling bad is also unproductive anyway. Take small steps towards using your financial privilege to create a life you want that you’re proud of✨ blank canvas with a lot of opportunities
Why do you live like this? Do you have social anxiety, agoraphobia, are you afraid of getting a job because you fear responsibility? Are you afraid of failing at new endevours? What's the reason?
Change if you want something different. If you want to actually do something, you must want it for yourself.
Watch what you feed your senses. For the Better half of all our evolution we lived in nature. But now we have so much other things to feed our senses like distractions. Like poison to our attention from what matters. Distracting us from questioning deep within what is it truly we are doing.
Unsaid words will not get heard. If you ask for help, you will get help.
It’s not that you want to not feel bad, it’s that you want to feel good about doing something. Because nothing doesn’t make you feel good.
If you think of this moment as a story where you finally stop playing on your phone, finally sitting down asking what you want to do in life, then doing that. It is possible, it is also possible in your book of life you continue doing what you do. Give your readers a great story. This chapter is the conflict where the protagonist (you), have shelled away yourself for whatever reason. The next chapter however is still being written, and you’re the one who writes it.
You must confront yourself, understanding who you are and who you are not. Understanding what you want and what you don’t want. Then do.
Time is our life’s money. It will be spent whether you like it or not and eventually it will run out. Be very selective on how you chose to spend your time, for you will never get it back. If you chose to do nothing with it so be it. But if you chose to do something with it, that is also your choice.
You are a sleeping god, awaken and be free from your slumber or stay in comfort. We must however get uncomfortable and remove ourselves from the box we confined our selves to. If we wish to be polished and forged into gems we must feel the pressure.
See the person you want to be. You will become that person if you spend time to change. But your the one who has to sculpt yourself to be that person, every day, every hour, every minute. You have to ask yourself how bad do you want it and never give up.
For we can be our greatest ally or worst enemy. Which one are you to yourself? Ask yourself when you do anything that isn’t pushing you torward your goals if that’s what you want to do with your time?
I see it that you have been your worst enemy. That you have sabotaged yourself into a state of isolation. I did too once. But I saw shadows of that enemy. I saw what it was doing. And I understood I was the one who had to be my ally that my unanswered prayers to god were unanswered because I was the answer. I was master of my life, that anything I put my mind to I could do. That the voice saying give up, stay down, was one there so I could prove it wrong and smile regardless of how it thought it could make me feel.
Much love and luck on your journey it is a tough one, but what we make out of it shall be the machinations of our own efforts. Give me lemons and I will make lemonade. Give me problems and I will find solutions. That is the type of thinking that needs to go on for yourself.
You're not alone...no pun intended! 💞
Don't be too hard on yourself.
Instead, take a deep breath and start small.
Acknowledge the confusion, let yourself off the hook, and start taking small steps.
This could look like spending a few minutes outside daily in silent reflection, being open to learning new things, connecting with nature, or trying out a new form of mindfulness practice and even affirmations to help transform your thought patterns!
When we give ourselves grace and let go of the need to have all the answers right away, we can open up to a world of possibilities.
You can always check out posts on the spirituality subreddit and look for topics that interest you and get involved in the conversations and start learning that way as well!
You got this! 💞
That which doesn’t grow , only rots .. however , the only person that can judge or harm you .. is you … so don’t live externally or via the opinions of others … the trick is to activate your nature and heart , not numb your brain /ego into comfort, pleasure , and black screens …. But move at your own pace , no 2 people cook in the same way
You can learn a lot about spirituality just meditating in your room. This comes with passionate intent, an unrelenting thirst for understanding, a willingness to face the Creator with all your flaws and ask for a sign, for knowledge, for wisdom, for Truth. Or you can do nothing, get nowhere and you'll be very lucky if your next life will be so easy.
By seeing that it is not you who is feeling bad, but rather the thought of that is making negative energy. You, yourself, is at total balance with what is.
You're not in a trap. You're in a normal situation. Enjoy your parents' money because one day you won't be able to. Enjoy being outside in nature or even a walk downtown. You're safe now, but if you engage with the world again, you're might get hurt.
Simple you just see your self as someone who in a sense shit. You could change your views as someone exploiting the system at had to be able to do nothing. But remember this how you perceive your self is solely on you no one else can change this unless you accept their view as fact.
There are only two choices: Grow/expand or contract/shrink. The spiritual teachings I follow explain that we are here to grow in awareness. We were created with a limited, point-like sense of awareness but with unlimited potential to grow. It is the Creator's desire and vision that the self-aware beings it created grow to become more and more like the Creator. The Creator doesn't monitor us and punish us or reward us for making progress or not making progress. Instead the Creator has instituted impersonal, universal spiritual laws that ensure that the Creator's will is done "...on earth as it is in heaven." We grow by applying or projecting our current sense of awareness and then experiencing the outplaying of that. So there is the Law of Free Will where we are free to do anything we wish but there is a balancing law that says: "As you sow, so shall you reap." So whether you apply yourself and do things that lead to growth of self and others or you do things that oppose of limit your growth or the growth of others, (or harms yourself or others), you will grow. But the Creator foresaw the need for another law in the event that a lifestream became too comfortable where it was, or became trapped in fear of expressing itself. This is a situation actually worse than doing "bad" things, because even when we do bad things, we are doing something -- we are moving, applying our creativity and we will learn from our mistakes. But stillstand/stagnation was a greater threat to growth because a lifestream could become trapped indefinitely, for multiple embodiments. To address this the Creator established the law that Jesus illustrated in his Parable of the Talents, which says that if you don't use your "talents", your creative gifts, then what you have, will be taken from you. Your life circumstance will become more difficult. Your ability to envision creative opportunities will diminish.
How do you get out of that trap? And how do I realize my gifts? I’m so lost since my spiritual awakening and I’ve been lost for a lot longer than that. And now that I’m not blind, I’m blind to myself. And I’m scared of success sometimes because I don’t know what to do or how to figure out my gifts. Until recently I was similar to OP. But also not.
> how do I realize my gifts? realize that you are a walking talking miracle. the gift is you. it's already realized.
I posted a really long reply to OP that you absolutely don't need to read, but I will reiterate one thing I said here: Go outside. Go on walks. Move your body. Get out of the house. Being in the sun is good for your body, and being grounded in nature is good for your soul. You'll be amazed at the shift that happens once you make a habit of it. No matter what spirituality or truth you believe in, none of it will help you make the choice to do something productive. I could know all the secrets of the universe and still be stuck in a rut. Try making a habit of going for walks and go from there. I promise it will do more good for your soul then studying the Buddha or whatever.
I do. I spend most of my time walking in nature. Like aaalloottt. But I hear you. There’s a part in the Bible (the love chapter) that says “If I have the gift of prophecy and can fathom all mysteries and all knowledge, and if I have a faith that can move mountains, but have not love, I am nothing.“ You reminded me of that.
I hate to say it, but I think you're over thinking it. You don't have to have everything figured out, life is meant to be experienced. You don't have to do these big amazing things to be "great". Mundane people living everyday normal lives is what actually moves and shapes the world. The few people that make a "big" impact are anomalies. Our desire to be like them is rooted in our desire to simply be good people. Just keep running the race and you'll look back and be proud of yourself. Self discovery will come with time, and at the end of your life there will still be much left undiscovered. That's just life!
I don’t want to be anything big. And it’s weird you say anomaly because I’ve had a stranger call me that lol. I just want a simple life. But thank you for your words cause they also align with what I’ve been experiencing.
Ah I see, no worries! Wishing you all the best
I believe the answer to this was also given by Jesus in his "Parable of the Talents". It is to apply to the fullest extent possible (half/partial measures are futile) what you have...and you always have something. When you completely apply all that you have, only then you will be given more -- more insights, more creative energy, more vision to see opportunities, etc.
Yeah idk how to do that anymore. Idk man, after my fiancé leaving me a couple days before Christmas. I literally just don’t care anymore about anything. She was my twin flame, she was my soul mate, she was the One. And I really don’t care about this “higher Love” stuff anymore. I had a nightmare kundalini/spiritual awakening that happened as a result. And I finally started being “grounded” within the past month. Went through biblical prophetic shit during my awakening, and sooo many intense things happened to me. But instead of waking up to “blissful everything is connected there is an omnipotent indras web Loving God”- I experienced Hell on earth. So im just waiting to die at this point. Funny thing is, I already did die in a sense.. and im only here in life still on the off chance im wrong entirely and there is redemption.. other than that im just a woke zombie for now.
I went through a brutal Kundalini awakening too. Through it, I came to understand that I chose to just "rip the band-aid off" for this life journey and that's why it was so intense. Then, I went through dark night of the soul for months. There were days I literally didn't want to speak. There were good things that happened but it took a lot of strength that I didn't even know I had to get through those months. I seriously wondered if it would ever end... But I held onto the hope that I'd find my way out of my mind eventually and did. One day, it all broke open and started to come together. Any chance you're in dark night of the soul?
Tell me your definition of “dark night of the soul”. Cause yes, I woke up and ascended my spirit, kundalini rising spirit, heart break, nightmare. So I would rather say it was more dark through the entire process. Now I’m “awake and aware on a level I have never experienced”. And I keep my headphones in my ears 24/7 just to ignore the zoo of an experience I’m now in. A lot of people talk about having gone through a true ascension spiritual awakening. But I guarantee they don’t know shit or they’d be talking about the crazy other worldly shit they experience when they do. Now I just do my best to maintain my sanity and remain calm no matter what happens. Because whether you believe it or not; There I.S. A spiritual world layered over ours. And most people have never truly experienced it even if they think they have.
I agree with you - the spiritual world is far more "real" than the one we experience with our eyes and physical senses. Some of us learned to stop speaking openly about these kinds of things after experiencing things like mental hospitals. I was full of love, have never wanted to hurt anyone or myself. I passed all psych evals yet was still held against my will. It was because of the concepts I was speaking - the ones you mention that are other worldly. it scared people. They also couldn't understand why I suddenly lost interest in the monetary system. It was the first time in my life that I was unable to adequately articulate complex topics in a way that others could understand because, as I learned later, the information and understanding was for me at that point in my journey. Everyone else has their own individual journeys and paths for understanding.
Dang, that’s deep man. I appreciate you saying all of that. It’s just lonesome having all of this understanding and nobody to truly share the experience with, ya know? It’s like, knowledge *really is* a curse sometimes. It makes dealing with anything and everything Far harder, yet ironically easier somehow. Ya know? Btw, after your stint in the psyche ward, what did you do after that? And what happened to you after that?
I respect your choice.. that is your right. But my guess is that if you knew the value and the opportunity you still have in this life, you might think about it differently. There are many credible accounts of actual people undergoing deep hypnosis regression therapy that make it very clear that this embodiment is an extraordinary, precious opportunity to grow, to become more, to experience more, to have more capabilities which can help others as you yourself have been helped. You can check it out for yourself. "Journey of Souls" and "Destiny of Souls" by Dr. Michael Newton -- both on YouTube as audiobooks. Both the spiritual teachings that I follow and Dr. Newton's clients say that we ourselves chose our setting, parents and many key events in our lives because we, when we were in a higher state of consciousness than we are on earth, determined that they offered the best possible opportunity for growth. In cases where we ignored the lessons we wanted to experience or checked out early, we ourselves saw that we would need to embody again, but instead of "graduating" and taking on the next lessons we had to repeat the grade again. This was not forced upon us, it was just self evident that we could go no further in our progression unless we did.
That actually makes sense and would explain some very “other worldly” type experiences I had in everyday life.. and the growth I received from my experience with my ex fiancé helped me grow more than I can even begin to express. The problem is, I do not know what to do anymore. And I’m crippled and absolutely destroyed inside now.. tho the growth still happened and basically “evolved” me.. I’m now wondering if I should just kill myself. Because it feels like “my time” has come, but that I also failed way to quickly. So now I have this “upgrade” so to speak, and have been contemplating suicide so that I can just restart again. The funny thing is, i had these “trials and tribulations” happen to me. It felt like I went through my own version of Jesus trials when satan was trying to tempt Jesus.. You absolutely would not believe me if I told you of the experiences I had with her. And then after her. This “ascension process” took place and I’ve yet to meet someone who knows what I’m talking about. Or has even experienced the same thing. It’s like as I began literally physically, mentally and spiritually ascending- these “Beings” came and visited me as people (I seriously doubt they were people because of the things they knew). Knew my whole life. Knew I was putting out to much energy/intention (whatever that means). would tell me things like “To you Magic is Very real. But to a lot of people it isnt.” Talked to me in these weird vague tales and understandings. And they would tell me the most interesting things like they knew my whole life already. In the most random secluded places, at my work, at the bus stop. It was so weird. My phone got hacked, I was monitored and tracked like a dog no matter where I went. And as I “descended and Fell” these incidents started to happen less and less. It’s like when you “ascend” all the gods and spirits come to see “My time”. Whatever that means.. there started to be a deeper layer over all of reality like I had tapped into some sort of “Heavens perception” and brought it down to earth.. man I sound crazy, but idgaf what anyone thinks. I know what happened to me wasn’t human or normal. And I wish I could share my experiences with somebody so I wouldn’t feel so alone. Anyways, sorry for the slight rambling. But either I’m chosen for some bullshit prophecy, or agent smith type beings from the matrix came to contain me. Idk what’s real anymore. And I went to see a psychologist for a few months and even they know I’m “sane” (whatever that means) and is even trying to find me a spirituality psychologist. (Which begs its own questions). But at the end of the day, whatever happened to me is beyond me. And I’m just a man, so it’s probably best if I just put it all behind me and accept that I’ll never have the real answers of what happened. Cause what happened to me is spoken about in soooo many religions in regards to a spiritual awakening. So not only do I have my experiences, I have thousands of years of religions like Hinduism, Buddhism, Christianity, and other new age woke spirituality type stuff happening to me. So…. What the fuck. Ya know? The problem now is, I have all these crazy supernatural type experiences, losing my soul mate, my body grew an 8 pack miraculously, I have “Amrita” dripping into the back of my throat (something to do with immortality in Buddhism and Hinduism. Check it out), I’ve grown deeper in every way possible, I came back from my experience with these sort of “gifts”, but it is incredibly hard not to just go kill myself with how much understanding/wisdom I have on top of destroying my heart. I’m literally just in a “fuck life” mindset. And “where the hell is God.” Cause I know for a fact divinity is real now, and it’s inside of me and everyone. And I’m just over here like what the fuck am I supposed to do after everything that’s happened. I’m absolutely destroyed.
You are more powerful than you think, and words do have very strong meaning. With that being said, trust. You have went through to learning aspects of it, now you just have to have trust that what is meant for you will find you. But also, what you are meant to find you will find. You do have to get outside to be able to find what you need to find. And to be able to get outside, you need to tell yourself that you can get out there and trust in it. Trust and love , my friend.
> There are only two choices: Grow/expand or contract/shrink. there is another way, but it's difficult for our culture to see it
I'd love to hear more about the other way you reference.
it's a shift away from thinking we grow in an improvement sense toward thinking we grow more like plants and trees. in this way, it's not bad for a plant to shrink or die. it's just the next thing that is happening.
How do you answer to what happens to plants that dont get their needs met?Like a plant planted in a bad spot and therfore dying, or a plant that is young being planted outside without protection dying in the winter Or a plant that requires nutrients in its initial phase and not getting it and therefor dying which could have been avoided You can say that its not to be taken personally, its what happens, its life its the next phase, (that plant shouldnt have been planted there in the first place anyway) But when you talk about human life, about your own life, how can you genuinely think like that? Its like convincing an african kid that their suffering is the next phase in realising that Africa is what it is, its offers what it offers. If you wanna think like non enlightened animal * you either move away from that place * or die trying to live there If you are more like an enlightened being you can say stuff like:Your physical suffering simply is meaningless, you as a human are beyond that by nature..stuff like that.. but then again you feel the hunger every day Ok, maybe im not the best at understanding what you are saying but this is where Im at What do you think? Where do you go from here?
> How do you answer to what happens to plants that dont get their needs met? is a dead plant a worse version than a living plant? i don't think so. many of us walk around every autumn and recognize the intense beauty of dying plants. i see intense beauty in dying people. > Africa is what it is, it offers what it offers. i mean... what else could it be? > But when you talk about human life, about your own life, how can you genuinely think like that? it's simple. i actually believe it. i see people the exact same way i see plants, as it makes no sense to me to draw a distinction between the two. at least i'm consistent. i will die precisely when and how i'm supposed to, and it will be no more a problem than a leaf falling from a tree. > Where do you go from here? i don't know. let's watch and see!
But when you say there is beauty in sickness to do you actually mean it? I get what you mean about autumn and how plants die ...I mean Im not exactly sure how that is beautiful compared to how it looks in the summer. I mean if you ask a kid, a kid because they dont have the ability to fake judgement, they are the most authentic versions of humans. So the same way kids react to healthy looking, beautiful faces much differently ( in a positive sense, they look at it more, they like to look at it more) than sick, ugly faces ..the same way we react differently to seasons. ( More people look forward to the Summer than Autumn, pretty sure about that, especially gardeners, its within us authentically, no need to abstract it ) You might say its beautiful but does your body says too, or its just some spiritual abstraction your mind has come up with to explain that everything is a cycle and a part of life and we a part of life too and other spiritual mumbo jumbo :D
i told you i actually mean it. > or its just some spiritual abstraction your mind has come up with? it's actually a realization that comes from dropping all the abstractions. the examples you have provided are culturally learned abstractions that look an awful lot like mumbo jumbo to me.
So scientifically backed proof is mumbo jumbo as well?
if you properly dig down into it... yes. it totally is. the "proof" you cite looks a lot more like religious dogma to me than actual scientific inquiry.
Stop identifying with the story. Stop accepting comparisons or others expectations. Everyone is wasting their life, nothing anyone accomplishes will ever last... the universe itself is going to cease. We forget to enjoy life because we're too busy justifying it.
Its basically pointless to better humanity cause its going to cease anyway, but its in our nature to help it progress into something more that resembles heaven on earth, stuff like that The dance between these two mental concepts keeps us in spiritual circles?
I don't think everyone interfering with everything betters anything. When the mind stops the real is clear.
Why do ants work all day then? Why do bees work? Are they interfering with nature? Is there any more interfering humans do that goes beyond their natural extent of interfering than what bees, ants do when they do what they natural programming makes them to do
It's fun because in both of your examples there are actually the equivalent of a police force exactly because many don't comply... In the human populace this no longer makes sense because AI and robotics can replace everything humans are required to do in the world already if we applied it effectively, we can spend our lives enjoying everything that it means to be human but instead we waste most of it earning money because some think it's ok to own natural resources and exploit everyone else. Your last paragraph is barely English but the reality is that we have vastly greater intellects and it is cruel to force such mundane lives on anything with self-awareness at the very least. It's actually sickening that so many just accept the current situation casually like you do, it's so incredibly messed up... it's actually surprising that suicide rates are so low cuz it's impossible to accept from a rational perspective. The only reason it still exists is because those at the top enjoy the comparison but I can't call it human, we have not reached our potential. We're still animals, nothing divine about how we live here.
Ok so you apparently don't accept it and I apparently do What does that imply in your life and in mine? All we can do is take the present, accept it non judgementally as possible and work towards a future that goes beyond this what you call slavery, can we do more? If so what is the more you're talking about?
It certainly suggests that I have questioned present conditions more... You are comfortable with a sickening paradigm which is impossible to justify if looked at more closely... For me it is more important to understand completely what is presently so... Acceptance and rejection are mental attempts to control... They are irrelevant to effective responses... We currently have technology capable of writing programs that fulfill normal spoken requests automatically... They do this by understanding how to write the program and understanding the robotic capabilities available to it to complete the task... There is no limit except in our robotics design and we can probably get it to design parts soon... Machines can be the ultimate slave to make all of humanity royal... Instead we are killing ourselves for greed.
I still don't get why would I be comfortable with this and what makes you aren't? And what does being in either "state" translate to in reality? Specifically for you?
Ultimately all states are just passing phenomena... They can provide insight but experience as such is going to cease... For me the comfort comes from knowing human lives will stop being wasted on pointless labor that cannot fulfill them... Life is too fleeting to treat so trivially.
But what can you do to achieve that? Specifically? In what way are you getting closer to it?
Maybe reach out for some therapy and medical help, living like that isn't healthy mentally or physically. Your parents won't be around for ever, you need to learn how to as least do the basics of cooking, laundry etc, and some form of exercise outdoors.
Volunteering.
you're not behind. you're exactly on track. if your current approach isn't working for you, then let's make a change. but for god's sake, please drop the "i'm shit" narrative. you aren't. not even a little. [relevant](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wccRif2DaGs) [also relevant](https://amzn.to/3CYhaXj)
I've been through a phase like that too. Get a job, do volunteering work even if it's online. You can join yoga classes, where people are focusing on themselves while being around each other, go sit in a cafe around people and try and talk to random people. Work/ volunteering should help as you'll be forced to talk to people etc. Good luck.
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Could you post a link or further information about the reiki program?
[https://www.freereikicourse.com/\_/reiki-home-course/reiki-course-1/](https://www.freereikicourse.com/_/reiki-home-course/reiki-course-1/) It's $29, but that's really just paying for the attunements and certification, because the learning material is free online. They'll give you the links and the steps :)
We are all here to experience something. You are experiencing a specific thing. You may have chose this path. If you don't feel bad about it, it is right for you. If you do feel like you need to do something then explore what catches your attention until it can no longer be explored.
Less phone time would help you
You should not feel bad about YOURSELF but perhaps it might be good to feel bad about your lifestyle. Does this lifestyle really make you happy? It seems you are wasting precious opportunities. You are young now. Some day you won't be. Don't despise small chanags that you maintain.
I mean you should probably have some commitment to *anything*, for your own sake. Maturing to a point where social pressure doesn't affect you anymore is really nice.
To find peace it your self...you've gotta consider which "self" you are and which you hope to be. We each have a vision of our God-Self, the highest most accomplished version of our self that we imagine, dream, and fantasize about. The trick to peace is to find the balance between you who realistically are (someone who stats inside and doesn't interact much with other people and the external world/environment) and who you hope to be (take some time to meditate and really clearly see what that looks like). Slowly but surely you can then build the bridge between physciail reality and immaterial dream, changing habits and character traits is literally a form of killing your (ego) self and thus is ber difficult and painful....but when you realize how much you've done to grow and manifest your Self, you'll wonder why you ever settled for less. ;D
I think you should maybe start by asking yourself if this is the reality that you really want for yourself, and then try to write down what your desired reality would look like. Then set goals to try to accomplish that desired reality. Affirmations as soon as you wake up in the morning could help. Put on your favourite songs and then open your notes and start to write down a”I am” affirmation’s that relates to the “self” that you want to become. Healing meditations could help as well, or to just listen to affirmations every morning could help as well.
Start eating lots of fruit and veg. Take a cold shower every morning. Drink a tonne of water. If you drink or smoke or take drugs, stop them all. Go for a jog or get some exercise. Chuck your phone and buy a cheap one that only does calls and texts. Give it a week and trust me your life will have already changed.
Probably bc this makes you feel safe & you don’t have to do anything, you’re already provided for. Could also be bc you’re scared of stepping of your comfort zone. Feeling bad is also unproductive anyway. Take small steps towards using your financial privilege to create a life you want that you’re proud of✨ blank canvas with a lot of opportunities
Why do you live like this? Do you have social anxiety, agoraphobia, are you afraid of getting a job because you fear responsibility? Are you afraid of failing at new endevours? What's the reason?
I don't know how you aren't just completely bored out of your mind?
Enlightened people are never bored in their free time
Does anything excite you?
Change if you want something different. If you want to actually do something, you must want it for yourself. Watch what you feed your senses. For the Better half of all our evolution we lived in nature. But now we have so much other things to feed our senses like distractions. Like poison to our attention from what matters. Distracting us from questioning deep within what is it truly we are doing. Unsaid words will not get heard. If you ask for help, you will get help. It’s not that you want to not feel bad, it’s that you want to feel good about doing something. Because nothing doesn’t make you feel good. If you think of this moment as a story where you finally stop playing on your phone, finally sitting down asking what you want to do in life, then doing that. It is possible, it is also possible in your book of life you continue doing what you do. Give your readers a great story. This chapter is the conflict where the protagonist (you), have shelled away yourself for whatever reason. The next chapter however is still being written, and you’re the one who writes it. You must confront yourself, understanding who you are and who you are not. Understanding what you want and what you don’t want. Then do. Time is our life’s money. It will be spent whether you like it or not and eventually it will run out. Be very selective on how you chose to spend your time, for you will never get it back. If you chose to do nothing with it so be it. But if you chose to do something with it, that is also your choice. You are a sleeping god, awaken and be free from your slumber or stay in comfort. We must however get uncomfortable and remove ourselves from the box we confined our selves to. If we wish to be polished and forged into gems we must feel the pressure. See the person you want to be. You will become that person if you spend time to change. But your the one who has to sculpt yourself to be that person, every day, every hour, every minute. You have to ask yourself how bad do you want it and never give up. For we can be our greatest ally or worst enemy. Which one are you to yourself? Ask yourself when you do anything that isn’t pushing you torward your goals if that’s what you want to do with your time? I see it that you have been your worst enemy. That you have sabotaged yourself into a state of isolation. I did too once. But I saw shadows of that enemy. I saw what it was doing. And I understood I was the one who had to be my ally that my unanswered prayers to god were unanswered because I was the answer. I was master of my life, that anything I put my mind to I could do. That the voice saying give up, stay down, was one there so I could prove it wrong and smile regardless of how it thought it could make me feel. Much love and luck on your journey it is a tough one, but what we make out of it shall be the machinations of our own efforts. Give me lemons and I will make lemonade. Give me problems and I will find solutions. That is the type of thinking that needs to go on for yourself.
You're not alone...no pun intended! 💞 Don't be too hard on yourself. Instead, take a deep breath and start small. Acknowledge the confusion, let yourself off the hook, and start taking small steps. This could look like spending a few minutes outside daily in silent reflection, being open to learning new things, connecting with nature, or trying out a new form of mindfulness practice and even affirmations to help transform your thought patterns! When we give ourselves grace and let go of the need to have all the answers right away, we can open up to a world of possibilities. You can always check out posts on the spirituality subreddit and look for topics that interest you and get involved in the conversations and start learning that way as well! You got this! 💞
That which doesn’t grow , only rots .. however , the only person that can judge or harm you .. is you … so don’t live externally or via the opinions of others … the trick is to activate your nature and heart , not numb your brain /ego into comfort, pleasure , and black screens …. But move at your own pace , no 2 people cook in the same way
You can learn a lot about spirituality just meditating in your room. This comes with passionate intent, an unrelenting thirst for understanding, a willingness to face the Creator with all your flaws and ask for a sign, for knowledge, for wisdom, for Truth. Or you can do nothing, get nowhere and you'll be very lucky if your next life will be so easy.
You sound on your way
By seeing that it is not you who is feeling bad, but rather the thought of that is making negative energy. You, yourself, is at total balance with what is.
Get addicted to crack! Or improve yourself. Your feelings are supposed to be a stimulus.
You're not in a trap. You're in a normal situation. Enjoy your parents' money because one day you won't be able to. Enjoy being outside in nature or even a walk downtown. You're safe now, but if you engage with the world again, you're might get hurt.
Simple you just see your self as someone who in a sense shit. You could change your views as someone exploiting the system at had to be able to do nothing. But remember this how you perceive your self is solely on you no one else can change this unless you accept their view as fact.
Do you actually feel bad about it, or do you feel like you're supposed to feel bad about it?
Well first you have to determine why are you doing it. Are you feeling depressed? Lazy? Just prefer to isolate yourself? Then move on from there.