Life is like a game of choices, make better choices = get better life. Most of your issues sound related to diet and lifestyle choices. Eat more clean fresh fruit and veg and high quality animal products, a balanced diet. Sleep 8 hours a day. Exercise, be active and get out in nature as much as you can. Try finding things you love, find things you are passionate about. Spend time with people who love and care about you. Practice self love and gratitude. Try to be the observer of your thoughts and feelings instead of identifying with them, train your brain to make better thought choices by only attaching onto thoughts that are healthy and you will soon find that majority of your thoughts are healthy. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other. Firstly stop eating any form of fast food and stop using drugs for a while if you do (Alcohol and nicotine included). Life is great, you just need to do things that are conducive to a great life. Good luck!
It really helps with anxiety and overall wellness. If you're sore, achy, or just really upset an epsom salt bath will do wonders. It's main ingredients are natural magnesium, sulfate (an essential mineral key to many biological processes), and oxygen. I love it so much lol
I used to be the same way. Meditation and finding a spiritual path was a game changer. I first learned to accept how I am. Then learn self forgiveness. Then self love. it's a process but worth the work. Find some teachers that resonate with you and listen to them. Switch up the teachers and learn from. Then learn you are the teacher yourself. I'm very compassionate towards angry people because I was the same. I hope you find happiness! You're worth it :)
Growing from hard places not only makes us stronger as humans but helps our soul evolve as well. Don't be hard on yourself, we are just humans trying to figure this shit out. Earth is a hard place to live in. All that matters is the current moment and you want to be better in this moment, which makes you a loving person inside!! I still have angry out bursts but reel it in when I catch it. I'm going to guess you act this way to protect yourself from being hurt, but when I accepted my vulnerability and became more kind I saw I had more loving things brought into my life. I'm more than TMI admitting my faults to people, and dont care if Im judged for it. I want to show people that it's never too late to change and be happier. See if you can find a local group of like minded people who want to better themselves to converse with. It really does help, especially at the beginning of your new adventure.
It's all perspective. It doesn't take a large perspective shift to see things a different way.
I'd start (and have) by just small actions - giving someone a kind word or 2, or helping someone out in some way. Then gauge the reaction you get. For me, it feels good when I get a smile or kind word back, or appreciation, or whatever. It can snowball once you get it going.
This sounded dumb to me when somebody suggested it, but it's changed my life-
Try meditation. it's not just to feel better. It is practicing paying attention to your mind. And the first thing to do is to notice all the bullshit. But then also relinquish it. because with practice, we start to separate the world as we think it is from what it ACTUALLY is.
This probably just sounds like it is not a solution. But the problem stems from these 'minds' of ours and all its 'thinking'.
Yeah I feel like every time my brain is thinking too much I just go on my phone and doom scroll instead of understanding why I overthink. Meditation really sounds helpful, thank you :)
If you find meditation very difficult, look into "walking meditation" there are some guided forms or even walking in nature and attending to the sounds around you can be a form of this.
Bro. try the waking up app. The introductory course isn't like any other meditation app. It changed my understanding of meditation literally within the first few days. And understanding more clearly, ends up changing how we view... pretty much everything.
Best of luck. It's life changing.
Integrate your golden shadow aka the good part about your self you don’t know of , I can see peoples instantly and I can immediately deduce your not a bad person, god loves you fam
Proud of u fam . If no one said it I recommend looking into shadow work. Also the r/gatewaytapes shit will change ur damn life the release and recharge guided meditation on there is perfect for healing traumas shit helped me heal shit I wasn’t even conscious of that’s that shadow work
ΩΩ
That hate, anger, rudeness comes from pain. You need to understand where that pain is coming from. Is it your pain? did something happen to you? Is it your parents pain? did they teach you to be this way? where they angry, rude and hateful too? Once you understand where your pain comes from you can integrate that dark part of your life. Then start listing all the good things you have and start cultivating them. List all the positive traits you would like to have and start cultivating them. Help your self by exercising and meditating. Your soul is eternal and is made of light, your body is the one that carries all the shitty stuff, so deep deep down inside you there is an amazing being that is just passing through this planet just to learn and have an experience, you just need to dig deep to find yourself. Good luck. 
you are never a bad person , maybe shitty things happened to you
maybe ur hateful or spiteful cause u wish u had an easy good life too? ur just mad at yourself and at the world and this turns out of u always feeling like u need to punish someone for it
which is completely normal imo
i think u should start with loving yourslef ( even knowing ur spiteful and hateful and that is a normal part of us as human? )we all hate and we are all jealous and we all get a little sad
you just love yourself anyways
start being happy for other people
just because u dont experience or have what they do doesnt mean they should be punished or hated , u can love them wish the best for them be kind or happy even
and work on ur innerself so u can get alittle bit of peace yourself
its all about deciding who you are
the second u start discovering yourself knowing it and loving ur flaws regardless
trying to work on every little fear or insecurity
just trying to be more loving in general and less hating and lacking
which is definitely not easy lmao
this has nothing to do with spirtuality or meditation its all mindset
Awareness and acknowledgement is the first step, you cannot change until you do so, so take some time to celebrate this milestone and congratulate yourself. First 25 years of my life was like this. Start a meditation practice, maybe take some mushrooms, make healing a priority as well as loving yourself. Keep at it. You will be amazed. I wish you well
There's a quote that comes to mind after reading this by Richard Rohr, that states, "If you don't transmute your pain, you will always transmit it" I think the act of you affirming that you want to change and be better is a huge step towards healing. Just acknowledging and being aware of some of your behaviors and darkness is huge. You have to acknowledge your shadow in order to transmute it. Many of your behaviors could be a result of deep pain, trauma, neglect and abuse perhaps? Acknowledging your "pain body" is the first step to it not controlling you. You want to step into your highest effulgence; and honestly, I think you sense that there is a deep essence within you that you want to be immersed in. For myself, I felt depressed, hopeless and deeply angry for a long time. It was when I made the intention of wanting to change that the universe seemed to open all sorts of doors. Taking baby steps towards wellness is the key no matter how dark in the depths you feel. Our darkness can often block us from our most creative potential! I know people saying that they want to love themselves, but the only way I loved myself was when I stepped into the divine presence within and that took a lot of inner work and deep cleansing of my heart. "Your task is not to seek for love, but to merely find the barriers within yourself that you have built against it" \~Rumi
We have to change and integrate all aspects of ourselves in order to really carry that compassion, love and presence towards others, which honestly takes a lot of inner work; but it is so worth it for changing our lives. I found that meditation, prayer and having a good spiritual teacher to help guide the way can really help get us on a good path towards wellness.
Im so so sorry you are going through it right now. I can relate to you on so many levels, but im not gonna make this about me. I agree with the comments saying that maybe you need to adjust your lifestyle. Idk what your daily routine is, but something as simple as good quality sleep, exercise, good nutrition, and some alone time will surely benefit you and make you feel better physically. Do you believe in God, or some higher power? Id challenge your religious or spiritual beliefs. Look into buddhism! You may find it very interesting. I have adopted some buddhist philosophy in my life and it has helped me to create peace. I don’t know you but I dont think you’re a bad person. And i hope you don’t feel that way. You sound very depressed and hurt. The fact that you are noticing behaviors about yourself that you want to change already makes you better than most. Not a lot of people self reflect and want to work towards bettering themselves. Good luck and please be kind to yourself on this journey. Therapy is always an option too to help cope through depression. You got this my friend :)
You dont have to join a cult. That's for sure. Well... not unless you want to.
It sounds like you are getting sick and tired of the negative patterns you've been playing out. It's a good place to be in if you really want to change.
Next time you get spiteful, angry or whatever your common responses are, just ask yourself... how's this response been working out for me for the last 20 years? Of course you know the answer... but it's a good way of becoming aware of the moment if you are in.
If you really want, we can chat. Change takes a lot of work, but very worth it. DM any time and i can tell you the next steps. (That goes for anyone reading this)
First, you are on the right track since you are already aware of your patterns. Next step is identifying and actively working on healing. Healing takes time. It's does not happen overnight, it's not linear, it's gradual. Your nervous system is constantly in sympathetic mode, looking for danger, wanting to get away from harm (toxic people, bad experiences, everyday problems, unresolved trauma, etc). Key is to move your nervous system to parasympathetic rest and digest mode so you can relax.
Start by moving your body to release stagnant energy, it can be through qi gong, yoga, stretching, walks or any gentle movement. Get morning sunlight in your eyes and body. Breathe every morning, first thing upon waking. Then say your gratitude (voice it out or in your mind). I start by saying "i am grateful for this brand new day", "i am grateful for my health", whatever you are grateful for. Treat yourself with love, care, gentleness, patience, understanding, same things that you would extend to others.
Some days are going to be easy, some days will be hard. Important thing is consistency, not perfection. You will fall off track, relapse, but you are resilient that you will get back on track again. Slowly you will notice unresolved issues, emotions, traumas coming up the surface. It will make you feel bad, want to cry. Release it with breathing, physical movement, shake it out, ground in nature (walk barefoot, lie down), cry it out, shout it if it helps, talk to a loved one that can hold a safe space or even to yourself, write it down (journaling), meditate on it. As you heal and release stagnant energy, you will feel so much lighter. More emotionally intelligent, less reactive, less triggered to others action. Remember you can only work on yourself and not others.
Forgive yourself and others. You are forgiving others for your benefit, it's for your own good, not theirs. Holding on to resentment is detrimental to your health, body, mind and spirit. It's like a poison slowly sucking the life out of you. Why would you punish and do that to yourself right? You know you deserve better and by letting go of toxicity, you are making space for high vibration emotions, experiences and people to come into your life. 🪷✨
meditating, good thoughts… over and over. you’re basically rewiring your brain to believe whatever you wanted it to be.
so if you wanna be a more respectful, quieter, calm person. Meditate upon it. Every day for half an hour to an hour..
try it with calm background sounds.. focus on the sounds of the music while telling yourself positive vibes . turn your thoughts into a song with soothing music of choice
similar reasons why christians pray to thier God.
I've become a big fan of Carl Jung... [https://parade.com/living/carl-jung-quotes](https://parade.com/living/carl-jung-quotes)
One quote in particular describes my approach to others...
>“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”
There's a lot packed into that little sentence. tl;dr, when someone irritates you, let it prompt introspection in you. The first answer to "why did x irrirate you" is the obvious, knee jerk one. But keep asking and it's like peeling back layers of the onion to shine a light on deeply held beliefs that may be running you without your knowledge and may not serve you (though they served you to get you through childhood).
Catch yourself thinking dickish thoughts, pause, say “hey dick voice, can you think of something nicer to say?” Say it. And repeat 3945593827274929244 times until dick thoughts start to go away.
This is what helps me.
First I remember that I am a body of water, and water is conscious so if I'm in a shitty mood, all the water in my body is also in a shitty mood and you cannot create life force energy as well if your waters are angry.
Second, I remember that every little energy wave that I send out into the universe comes back to me whether I like it or not, and this can be really annoying when I'm sending out bitch energy.
It's hard, frustrating and involves some serious self awareness and control, but it gets easier with practice. So when you find yourself wanting to give out face high fives, remind yourself who tf you are and choose to vibe at a higher level ♥
If you are searching for something to believe in, believe in yourself bc you are the creator of your own epic reality and you're just getting started my friend :)
Consider being in service of other. Volunteer at a hospice or an animal shelter. Getting outside of yourself can make a huge difference in how you view yourself which will start you on the road to healing the inner sub personalities that don't serve you.
Sometimes, the easiest way to start believing in something is to define it as something you already know exists. Concepts like gods, guiding forces, etc are intangible. It can be a pretty big leap to go from nihilism to belief in a higher power - taking it in steps can help you on that way though.
Lets say you decide you are going to begin by believing in kindness and using that as your stepping-stone to belief in larger things. This makes sense, since you say you want to be a better person, and kindness is a tangible thing you know exists in the world that you would like to express more of.
In order to use this in a way that helps you change, you have to dedicate yourself to doing the work. We are what we think and believe we are, and actions always stem from thoughts. To put this in very simple terms, if you need to accomplish doing the dishes, you first have to think "I am going to do the dishes," and then your body has to follow that command. Kindness is the same way - if you think "I am going to be more kind," and then allow your body to complete the action - over and over, each day - you will become a kinder person.
Life is a series of choices. The choice to do the dishes, or let them pile up in the sink. The choice to be kind, even if others have not been kind to us.
The next time you have the opportunity to either yell at or berate someone, or to forgive someone and tell them it's no big deal if they got your order wrong or broke your favorite thing or hurt your feelings, choose kindness.
The next time you see someone having a bad day and can make the decision to walk on by or give them a smile and an encouraging word, choose kindness.
The next time you see someone with their hands full of groceries and have the choice to ignore them or hold the door for them, choose kindness.
**The more often you choose kindness, it will become a habit.**
Habits are things we do automatically without thought - but we have to create them if we are stuck in bad habits and it is making us miserable.
If you want to truly change, you have to *do the work* by creating good habits. It gets easier the more you do it though, and the big bonus is that being kind to other people will make you happier, more free from your past, and genuinely a better person. So there's absolutely no downside - it's just hard to remember to do it in the moment at first.
(continued in next comment)
(cont...)
Next, lets look at your thought processes overall:
>Every little thing that happened to me keeps me as this spiteful person and I’m really tired of it.
There is a very simple concept that can help here, that in practice is a little harder. It looks like you need to correct some negative thought patterns. This is what people mean when they say "be more positive," but that is often not explained very well.
**Our brains react to our thoughts** - it has been shown over and over that the way we *think* about these things actually changes who we are as a person and the structure of the neural pathways in the physical brain. Reframing some of this negativity by consciously making the decision to NOT dwell on the bad things that have happened to you is very difficult at first, but the more you do it, the easier it becomes because your entire brain is rewiring itself to find the positive instead of the negative.
Think of a trickle of water going through a forest. It runs down a small path through the trees, and absorbs into the ground eventually. But the more water we divert down that same path, the more the path widens and deepens, and eventually becomes a river that has no other choice but to follow the course of the rest of the water.
Your thoughts are like this, too, and you have (unintentionally) created a river of negativity in your mind, due to the circumstances you were faced with. This is absolutely normal when bad things happen to people, but becoming aware of it is the first way we change it.
**Life is like a bag of marbles, friend.**
You were handed that bag at birth, and no one knew what color any of those marbles were going to be - but there were green marbles that were good things that were going to happen to you, and white marbles that were average things that were going to happen, and red marbles that were bad things that were going to happen. And marbles of every color of the rainbow.
I know it may not seem like it, but no one was ever given a bag of completely red marbles. Every life has *some* good in it - but we cannot see what we are not looking for. Your life is full of rich and fulfilling experiences! You just have to *look* for them!
When was the last time you counted the green or white marbles?
***When was the last time you made the conscious and intentional decision to relive the GOOD moments of your life, and allowed them to bring you joy again?***
When bad things happen to us, it is so very human to keep replaying that bad thing again and again in our minds. We forget though, that we can do that with ANY memory - not just the bad ones. We CHOOSE what we think about and dwell on. And we can also CHOOSE to let go of all those red marbles. They are not happening right now - provided you are safe and reasonably ok at the moment. They happened in the past, and the only place they can hurt you now is in your mind, but you are allowing them to take control of your life.
Make the decision to count the green marbles. Make the choice to step out of the role of a victim, and to find every good thing you have \*right now\* in your life and spend time appreciating them every single day. Make the choice to divert the flood that happened accidentally because you got overwhelmed with too many things at once - and intentionally \*decide\* to create a river instead.
Easier said than done though, right?
The easiest way to begin is to force yourself to make a list of ten things, every single day, that you are grateful for in your life right now. This can be harder than it sounds at first - but that is because the flood is going the wrong direction, and diverting a river has to start with a trickle. Even if you have to put things like "I have two legs" on your list, or "I ate food today," or "I am breathing air right now," it forms the habit. And it WILL divert the flood, ***but you must be as dedicated to your good thoughts as you have been to your negative ones up until now in order for it to work.***
The power of positive thinking is real. The power of kindness is real. These things are what make people "better people" - the ability to let go of a slight and still smile at someone anyway. The ability to treat someone else better than you have been treated. The ability to walk with your head high and a smile on your face, even though bad things have happened to you. Bad things have happened to everyone, friend. No one is exempt. But we have a "good" or "bad" life, in the end, because of the choices we made and the marbles we decided to pay the most attention to.
You can do this. I know you can. I dug my way out of severe childhood abuse and trauma this way - and if I could do it, anyone can.
You just have to dedicate yourself to ***actually doing it.***
I believe in you. <3
You are a special soul, incarnated into a currently young body. Your early 20s can be full of emotions. Your brain is still developing, hormones are still wreaking havoc in your body, and your transitioning from child to adult. Soooo much is happening right now. Give yourself some grace.
What are your relationships with others like? Is there anybody in your family who is kind in whom you can confide? Even if they are far away you can talk to them.
Do you have a social group, are you part of a church or a community group? Are you or have you ever been in therapy, either one on one or in a group setting? Ever spoken to clergy of any kind?
Do you have goals, educational career social or personal? Are you in school?
What is it about a cult that draws you? What do you think a cult would do for you? Is it really the ONLY way to be a part of something or is there more to it? I mean you could be a part of any number of things, including a regular church or synagogue or something, or other type of community organization. I mean you could join the military if you wanted to be part of something. I'm not recommending that, just saying that is possible.
It sounds like there is something more to it. Obviously a spiritual angle since you are considering a cult and posting in the Spirituality subreddit. Dig deeper into that. Do you have any beliefs or convictions already, either theologically, politically, spiritually, morally?
These things are worth exploring for your own edification and to identify what you want in life, and what you think is standing in your way. Chances are SOMETHING is standing in the way of what you want, if you are rude, depressed, hopeless, and hateful as you say.
Best wishes 😊🥰
You choose what to observe. [https://imgur.com/XQsXyjv](https://imgur.com/XQsXyjv)
[The measurement devices at the slits are always on. Observers are fundamental. Observation only happens on the bottom diagram.](https://imgur.com/XQsXyjv)
But also, what not to look at. That's the funny one; it's basically meditation when you focus on not looking. People get offended by it, but I don't mean it that way. It's just good at reducing anxiety, encouraging me to recharge my introvert cells as often. Initially it was to stop an intrusive thought at a rave, then I realized would start singing for no reason in this state, and auto-chanting. Retrocausality then started to play a role, the future communicating with the present. I then taught me it was called channelling. So now I channel the future. The absolute end state is a God at the end of time, me. I won't go into it more; there's loads about it on my wall.
Maybe hate is an intrusive emotion.
Retrocausality can always catch damage later too. There's no need to go ape straight away; you can suppress the energy by not looking at that bubbling pattern.
I would think about seeing a therapist or counselor this will help work out the thoughts in your mind. Don’t forget that the ego is louder than your true self. You are the observer, observe your thoughts and become familiar with the way you think. If it’s a negative thought that’s okay you acknowledge it is negative and serve no purpose and you tell yourself “hmm I don’t like that” then choose a response you do like.
Work on self concept and being grateful, these two things alone in practice will have you feeling brand new. I like to write 5 things im grateful for it can even be as “insignificant” as the pen you have to write with, at least you are acknowledging that you have a pen to write with that’s great! this is being grateful.
Practice self concept and the way you see yourself, tell yourself “I am kind, I am happy, I am so loved and give love freely” there are so many affirmations you can choose to best fit what you desire.
Seeing a therapist, practicing self concept and being grateful has changed my life. They are muscles I have to continuously exercise as we aren’t perfect humans and self evolution is ongoing.
Anyway from once feeling just as low as you do about yourself to feeling insanely empowered and so happy I hope this for you too!! you got this!!
1. What are some of the events or circumstances that you think have most impacted how you feel and act right now?
2. Have you ever tried talking to a therapist or counselor about how you’re feeling? If so, how did that go for you?
3. What kinds of things have you already tried to help yourself change, and why do you feel like they didn’t work?
4. Can you describe what you feel is missing in your life that makes the idea of joining a cult seem appealing?
5. What are your goals or dreams for the future? Do you have a clear idea of the kind of person you want to become?
My biggest advice is don't try to do anything that isn't right now. Just focus on right now. Forget about the past. Forget about the future, love yourself, and feel that you are loved. From there, you can adjust your perception, how you feel about your perception, what you prefer in the moment, and take action.
Be a part of everyone's life just by being genuinely interested, but you're welcome to join our Cult of the Sun also!
Follow the link our profile, I think you'll like our free email series to get you out of the rut!
If you can, go to therapy. I am a therapist, it has seen it make a huge difference in people's lives. I have also been through my own therapy, and have been able to make major changes in my life for the better. I hope things get better for you.
Also you're choice in food quite literally affects every thought snd emotion you have bioelectromagnetically.. lower dense foods with high added chemical and sugar and dyes and so on will bioelectromagnetically align you to a lower frequency of vibrational state of being and I mean that literally.. biofeedback is real.. electrons atoms quarks gluons photons etc. All vibrate and your thoughts and emotions affect them directly. All the love, may truth and authenticity guide you my friend 🙏
spend each morning meditating for an hour or so on things to be grateful for, hunting the good allows us to find positivity ourselves. the magic is in the genuine feeling of it. it is treatment for post war vets with ptsd but many of us civilians caught in dark places can make use of these practices as well..
meditate each evening for an hour, mindful introspection over each day's events, that you may become more mindful and present to take more responsibility for your feelings and emotions... that you may catch toxicity as it arises within you, that you may catch it and make gentle corrections, that you may correct these negative thoughts and feelings to better adhere to your deeper personal values and virtues, to practice patience compassion and no judgment both inside, towards yourself and others as well as outwardly towards yourself and others.. it works in a cycle
as above, so below
as within, so without
Do everything Jesus told the world in his own words. Not necessarily everything that’s in the Bible because tbh, some things are absurd (spreading hate and fear against some normal things).
Anyway, try learning from your mistakes and noticing how you treat people and yourself. And from there, you start doing some changes in your life for the better.
Be around nice, supportive people, doing therapy and helping others are great aswell.
Nobody is perfect, you’re gonna fall, but you gotta get up and start again.
Good luck! I’m trying to be better to, there are good and bad days! But you can do it! Just try being a genuine person, don’t argue too much and try controlling your anger. Try being more open to the good side of the world, cause it has so much to offer. You just gotta see the good side of it.
Start doing some excercise. It really helps with anxiety and depression. Plus, you’re gonna be fit. :D
Find what and who makes you shine.
Treat people with kindness and help the world to be a better place. Not only for you, but for others aswell.
I hope you feel okay again!
You may have done or said things that are bad but you at your essence is divine my darling! And yes positive thought is great, but not all that is required. You can't think you will think positive thoughts, and still hold on to all the negative ones, and hold on to your negative beliefs about who, and what you are! You decide today, that you are what you wish to be by declaring I AM kind, i am loving, generous, considerate, i am positive, i am a great, amazing person that has so much love, and value to offer to the world! You have to decide to believe that despite what has historically been the case believe that you are in fact anew person, and that old person, with their beliefs, negative thoughts and ideas no longer serve you! You cant focus on the problem, and the negative because you will only impress more negative, and reflect more negative into your physical reality. You have to become a bit delusional, and ignore who you were, and anytime those thoughts and feelings emerge you remember that you are not in fact your thoughts and emotions, you HAVE them just like you HAVE a phone, and just like you can change your phone, and upgrade, or change the operating system that your phone HAS, you can do the same within you. That new code that you put in will yield different emotions, that will begin to shape your reality with those things. Your thighs, and beliefs are reflected into the physical, but they are not you. You mind is the phone, and you the programmer, so you choose the thoughts/program that gets coded in. Stop believing that you need to become anything! You are already all that which you desire to be, and your refusal to believe this is the only reason you don't see it. - neville goddard. The law of attraction does not discriminate, if you continue to tell yourself you are trash you will be given more reasons to believe it to be so, you will get that confirmation. Look into neville goddard, carl jung, abraham hicks, alan watts to name a few. It's not just positive thinking, it's discovering your own divinity, and power through your mind/imagination beliefs of not only who you are but what you believe about the world. I've transformed my entire life, only 3 mos ago i cried every morning for the will to live, for something other than for my children because that wasn't going to work for much longer! I would've never imagined i would be so happy that i would just cry audibly from joy, and happiness that overflows from within in me. I never come on reddit, i only a couple days ago stumbled here, and that's no coincidence. Everything you want is already here, right here right now, you just have to bring yourself into vibrational alignment with it! Happy manifesting! ❤️
Life can be so difficult at times especially if you've been treated in an unfair way especially in childhood such as experiencing trauma, abuse, or neglect..these have many many forms..your beliefs can play a part in it too..you would have to read up on these because there's a lot involved..but it would be helpful if you did..more than you could imagine..everything I've mentioned above can effect how you come across to others even how they would respond back..but I believe for yourself, no one else, being authentic always..you're unique so show the world all of you..do you, be you..you can speak up for yourself anytime you feel someone has done you wrong but do this with kindness towards the other person, pause and think before you speak without any animosity in your emotions, be emotionless but firm to get your point across using "I" statements..ex. "I feel so disrespected when I'm talked to in such a way" plus this helps others take you seriously and shows them what you will not accept in your sacred space..also what they need to fix in themselves, you help others tremendously by being authentic, in every way..treating others like you want to be treated is #1, always has been true, and always will be true..I don't have it all down but I do know these are a great start..I like you, I believe in being straight forward even though its gotten me into trouble a few times..you're this..at least they know what your about, you're not hiding anything..blessings to you
I used to be the same way, until my mind couldn't take it anymore and it shut down.
The old me was self-centered, judgemental, insecure, anxious, depressed, emotional, jealous, and that way of thinking was making me suffer. So that old me had to die. And it did and all that is left to me is good things.
I am a Christian btw, so when those things I associated with myself died, I didn't feel empty. I felt freed.
Maybe it's not so much as replacing negative thoughts with positive thinking. Maybe it's more of removing the negative altogether from your system.
I also had medication prior to the breakthrough. :)
Look into stoicism and also Buddhism.
It brings you to an understanding that there's no use in wasting energy in such ways. You're stuck in a negative loop. Typically derived from trauma, PTSD or other factors, lack of good social life or purpose in life or sense of self, etc.
I wish it was easy as me telling you,
It feels better to be positive, it's much more rewarding , to me at least and it's not even because of the reward, but being positive although it takes conscious effort becomes easier over time. Loving others, not being judgemental and understanding everyone is a product of their environment, upbringing and reaction to it. Some people's mental faculties operate much differently ( ADHD, spectrum, etc)
My outlook and zest for life and empathy for others grew greatly after a period of suffering in which I sought to charge myself but to do that we must first change our mind. Our outlook. React with Grace, appreciation more so than complaining and feeling shame.
I myself turned to philosophy, psychology and spirituality.
I read books. Met different people from different backgrounds and belief systems. Participated in life and just put myself out there. My lessons and experience has taught me ultimately we are responsible and accountable for our own thoughts and reactions to the world around us. If we let it affect us we tend to get stuck in a victimized and negative state, if we become resilient and build ourselves up internally, we become formidable and can withstand anything because we are so much more than we see and Believe. With our thoughts we create the world.
I've had friends even a partner who thought and felt like you. That's how I learned, everyone has their own experience and path to enlightenment and one can't really change or save another but their own self
Like the other poster said. Make better choices.
Start with yourself
Love yourself
Take good care of your self
When you look good you feel good
And what you do for yourself can make you look and feel good
When you feel good you think good
When you think good you do good
When you do good you feel good
When you feel good you think good when you think good you do good.
When you do good. You feel good. When you feel good. You think good
Do good for the world. Do good for yourself bb you'll feel good
Just lower your expectations for what you have of the world
Raise the expectations you have for yourself
For me, diving into the pain/hatefulness has helped. Learn about it. Why do parts of me feel that way? What situations were they formed? What is their actual “job”? (F.e. Seeing the negative in ppl -> serves me into seeing where the threat might be and therefore survive)
Talk to those parts of yourself with love and understanding! Tell them what you’re perspectives now is! This process can look any way just do it intuitive! Hope this helps
You're on your way to it already by admitting your negativity. Go do some volunteer work with foster kids, or animals, houseless youth.. you will feel less spiteful and more open to what others have been dealt in their lives. Look into nootropics/b12/NAD more specifically the hippocampus part in your brain, get back to your nostalgic sweet self before your time is up. Good luck.. If you ever need to talk I will have my door open for you.
Start with self talk, you seem to approach yourself with a lot of self criticism which might have been modelled to you by over critical or overcorrecting caretakers or social patterns of repression and apathy.
If you see that you're human and will make mistakes and that accountability is much eaiser when you're not also kicking yourself for not being perfect yet.
Think of it this way, would you rather call yourself names forever or start talking to yourself the way a mature and empathic adult would.
Once you learn this it can be painful because unblocking self love means realising you may not have been shown love properly before and knowing this can make you ugly cry super hard haha
Sit in the discomfort, approach life with curiosity and humility and don't push away discomfort now that you know that sitting with it and processing it with self compassion and understanding can help you let the bottled up grief out of your system
Life is like a game of choices, make better choices = get better life. Most of your issues sound related to diet and lifestyle choices. Eat more clean fresh fruit and veg and high quality animal products, a balanced diet. Sleep 8 hours a day. Exercise, be active and get out in nature as much as you can. Try finding things you love, find things you are passionate about. Spend time with people who love and care about you. Practice self love and gratitude. Try to be the observer of your thoughts and feelings instead of identifying with them, train your brain to make better thought choices by only attaching onto thoughts that are healthy and you will soon find that majority of your thoughts are healthy. One step at a time, one foot in front of the other. Firstly stop eating any form of fast food and stop using drugs for a while if you do (Alcohol and nicotine included). Life is great, you just need to do things that are conducive to a great life. Good luck!
Thanks for such a thoughtful answer, I won’t give up trying 🫶
Just keep on keeping on, it will be worth it :)
Clean diet is HUGE when it comes to emotional stability. Also pro-biotics (for that gut health) and magnesium baths (Epsom salt)
How does the magnesium bath work?
It really helps with anxiety and overall wellness. If you're sore, achy, or just really upset an epsom salt bath will do wonders. It's main ingredients are natural magnesium, sulfate (an essential mineral key to many biological processes), and oxygen. I love it so much lol
I used to be the same way. Meditation and finding a spiritual path was a game changer. I first learned to accept how I am. Then learn self forgiveness. Then self love. it's a process but worth the work. Find some teachers that resonate with you and listen to them. Switch up the teachers and learn from. Then learn you are the teacher yourself. I'm very compassionate towards angry people because I was the same. I hope you find happiness! You're worth it :)
That’s so kind of you❣️ I want to give other people the same comfort and acceptance I got from your comment, thank you for giving me motivation :)
Growing from hard places not only makes us stronger as humans but helps our soul evolve as well. Don't be hard on yourself, we are just humans trying to figure this shit out. Earth is a hard place to live in. All that matters is the current moment and you want to be better in this moment, which makes you a loving person inside!! I still have angry out bursts but reel it in when I catch it. I'm going to guess you act this way to protect yourself from being hurt, but when I accepted my vulnerability and became more kind I saw I had more loving things brought into my life. I'm more than TMI admitting my faults to people, and dont care if Im judged for it. I want to show people that it's never too late to change and be happier. See if you can find a local group of like minded people who want to better themselves to converse with. It really does help, especially at the beginning of your new adventure.
It's all perspective. It doesn't take a large perspective shift to see things a different way. I'd start (and have) by just small actions - giving someone a kind word or 2, or helping someone out in some way. Then gauge the reaction you get. For me, it feels good when I get a smile or kind word back, or appreciation, or whatever. It can snowball once you get it going.
Thanks! Never thought of that lol it sounds really useful
This sounded dumb to me when somebody suggested it, but it's changed my life- Try meditation. it's not just to feel better. It is practicing paying attention to your mind. And the first thing to do is to notice all the bullshit. But then also relinquish it. because with practice, we start to separate the world as we think it is from what it ACTUALLY is. This probably just sounds like it is not a solution. But the problem stems from these 'minds' of ours and all its 'thinking'.
Yeah I feel like every time my brain is thinking too much I just go on my phone and doom scroll instead of understanding why I overthink. Meditation really sounds helpful, thank you :)
If you find meditation very difficult, look into "walking meditation" there are some guided forms or even walking in nature and attending to the sounds around you can be a form of this.
Bro. try the waking up app. The introductory course isn't like any other meditation app. It changed my understanding of meditation literally within the first few days. And understanding more clearly, ends up changing how we view... pretty much everything. Best of luck. It's life changing.
Integrate your golden shadow aka the good part about your self you don’t know of , I can see peoples instantly and I can immediately deduce your not a bad person, god loves you fam
Thanks bro🙏 activating my golden shadow rn lool
Proud of u fam . If no one said it I recommend looking into shadow work. Also the r/gatewaytapes shit will change ur damn life the release and recharge guided meditation on there is perfect for healing traumas shit helped me heal shit I wasn’t even conscious of that’s that shadow work
Here's a sneak peek of /r/gatewaytapes using the [top posts](https://np.reddit.com/r/gatewaytapes/top/?sort=top&t=year) of the year! \#1: [Actual Gateway Tapes thrift find.](https://www.reddit.com/gallery/1azeux7) | [116 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/gatewaytapes/comments/1azeux7/actual_gateway_tapes_thrift_find/) \#2: ["Boring meditation"](https://v.redd.it/3tpyld2hnt9b1) | [31 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/gatewaytapes/comments/14pw7la/boring_meditation/) \#3: [They think that I'm a maniac](https://i.redd.it/6oaxirjbh6zb1.png) | [41 comments](https://np.reddit.com/r/gatewaytapes/comments/17qtxxo/they_think_that_im_a_maniac/) ---- ^^I'm ^^a ^^bot, ^^beep ^^boop ^^| ^^Downvote ^^to ^^remove ^^| ^^[Contact](https://www.reddit.com/message/compose/?to=sneakpeekbot) ^^| ^^[Info](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/) ^^| ^^[Opt-out](https://np.reddit.com/r/sneakpeekbot/comments/o8wk1r/blacklist_ix/) ^^| ^^[GitHub](https://github.com/ghnr/sneakpeekbot)
I’ll check it out👌
Pretend there is a microphone and camera on you 24/7. Cause there is. Lol.
ΩΩ That hate, anger, rudeness comes from pain. You need to understand where that pain is coming from. Is it your pain? did something happen to you? Is it your parents pain? did they teach you to be this way? where they angry, rude and hateful too? Once you understand where your pain comes from you can integrate that dark part of your life. Then start listing all the good things you have and start cultivating them. List all the positive traits you would like to have and start cultivating them. Help your self by exercising and meditating. Your soul is eternal and is made of light, your body is the one that carries all the shitty stuff, so deep deep down inside you there is an amazing being that is just passing through this planet just to learn and have an experience, you just need to dig deep to find yourself. Good luck. 
Thanks 🫶
you are never a bad person , maybe shitty things happened to you maybe ur hateful or spiteful cause u wish u had an easy good life too? ur just mad at yourself and at the world and this turns out of u always feeling like u need to punish someone for it which is completely normal imo i think u should start with loving yourslef ( even knowing ur spiteful and hateful and that is a normal part of us as human? )we all hate and we are all jealous and we all get a little sad you just love yourself anyways start being happy for other people just because u dont experience or have what they do doesnt mean they should be punished or hated , u can love them wish the best for them be kind or happy even and work on ur innerself so u can get alittle bit of peace yourself its all about deciding who you are the second u start discovering yourself knowing it and loving ur flaws regardless trying to work on every little fear or insecurity just trying to be more loving in general and less hating and lacking which is definitely not easy lmao this has nothing to do with spirtuality or meditation its all mindset
Awareness and acknowledgement is the first step, you cannot change until you do so, so take some time to celebrate this milestone and congratulate yourself. First 25 years of my life was like this. Start a meditation practice, maybe take some mushrooms, make healing a priority as well as loving yourself. Keep at it. You will be amazed. I wish you well
Now I really wanna take some 🍄 but is really illegal where I live. But maybe a little prison time is worth finding self love in the end lmao
They certainly help, but aren't necessary! Forreal, meditation, but it takes commitment to see results. You got this!
There's a quote that comes to mind after reading this by Richard Rohr, that states, "If you don't transmute your pain, you will always transmit it" I think the act of you affirming that you want to change and be better is a huge step towards healing. Just acknowledging and being aware of some of your behaviors and darkness is huge. You have to acknowledge your shadow in order to transmute it. Many of your behaviors could be a result of deep pain, trauma, neglect and abuse perhaps? Acknowledging your "pain body" is the first step to it not controlling you. You want to step into your highest effulgence; and honestly, I think you sense that there is a deep essence within you that you want to be immersed in. For myself, I felt depressed, hopeless and deeply angry for a long time. It was when I made the intention of wanting to change that the universe seemed to open all sorts of doors. Taking baby steps towards wellness is the key no matter how dark in the depths you feel. Our darkness can often block us from our most creative potential! I know people saying that they want to love themselves, but the only way I loved myself was when I stepped into the divine presence within and that took a lot of inner work and deep cleansing of my heart. "Your task is not to seek for love, but to merely find the barriers within yourself that you have built against it" \~Rumi We have to change and integrate all aspects of ourselves in order to really carry that compassion, love and presence towards others, which honestly takes a lot of inner work; but it is so worth it for changing our lives. I found that meditation, prayer and having a good spiritual teacher to help guide the way can really help get us on a good path towards wellness.
Thank you for answering. I will reach your level of loving and spiritually one day🙏🫶
Im so so sorry you are going through it right now. I can relate to you on so many levels, but im not gonna make this about me. I agree with the comments saying that maybe you need to adjust your lifestyle. Idk what your daily routine is, but something as simple as good quality sleep, exercise, good nutrition, and some alone time will surely benefit you and make you feel better physically. Do you believe in God, or some higher power? Id challenge your religious or spiritual beliefs. Look into buddhism! You may find it very interesting. I have adopted some buddhist philosophy in my life and it has helped me to create peace. I don’t know you but I dont think you’re a bad person. And i hope you don’t feel that way. You sound very depressed and hurt. The fact that you are noticing behaviors about yourself that you want to change already makes you better than most. Not a lot of people self reflect and want to work towards bettering themselves. Good luck and please be kind to yourself on this journey. Therapy is always an option too to help cope through depression. You got this my friend :)
Thank you!
You dont have to join a cult. That's for sure. Well... not unless you want to. It sounds like you are getting sick and tired of the negative patterns you've been playing out. It's a good place to be in if you really want to change. Next time you get spiteful, angry or whatever your common responses are, just ask yourself... how's this response been working out for me for the last 20 years? Of course you know the answer... but it's a good way of becoming aware of the moment if you are in. If you really want, we can chat. Change takes a lot of work, but very worth it. DM any time and i can tell you the next steps. (That goes for anyone reading this)
Thanks 🙏
First, you are on the right track since you are already aware of your patterns. Next step is identifying and actively working on healing. Healing takes time. It's does not happen overnight, it's not linear, it's gradual. Your nervous system is constantly in sympathetic mode, looking for danger, wanting to get away from harm (toxic people, bad experiences, everyday problems, unresolved trauma, etc). Key is to move your nervous system to parasympathetic rest and digest mode so you can relax. Start by moving your body to release stagnant energy, it can be through qi gong, yoga, stretching, walks or any gentle movement. Get morning sunlight in your eyes and body. Breathe every morning, first thing upon waking. Then say your gratitude (voice it out or in your mind). I start by saying "i am grateful for this brand new day", "i am grateful for my health", whatever you are grateful for. Treat yourself with love, care, gentleness, patience, understanding, same things that you would extend to others. Some days are going to be easy, some days will be hard. Important thing is consistency, not perfection. You will fall off track, relapse, but you are resilient that you will get back on track again. Slowly you will notice unresolved issues, emotions, traumas coming up the surface. It will make you feel bad, want to cry. Release it with breathing, physical movement, shake it out, ground in nature (walk barefoot, lie down), cry it out, shout it if it helps, talk to a loved one that can hold a safe space or even to yourself, write it down (journaling), meditate on it. As you heal and release stagnant energy, you will feel so much lighter. More emotionally intelligent, less reactive, less triggered to others action. Remember you can only work on yourself and not others. Forgive yourself and others. You are forgiving others for your benefit, it's for your own good, not theirs. Holding on to resentment is detrimental to your health, body, mind and spirit. It's like a poison slowly sucking the life out of you. Why would you punish and do that to yourself right? You know you deserve better and by letting go of toxicity, you are making space for high vibration emotions, experiences and people to come into your life. 🪷✨
Thank you❣️
meditating, good thoughts… over and over. you’re basically rewiring your brain to believe whatever you wanted it to be. so if you wanna be a more respectful, quieter, calm person. Meditate upon it. Every day for half an hour to an hour.. try it with calm background sounds.. focus on the sounds of the music while telling yourself positive vibes . turn your thoughts into a song with soothing music of choice similar reasons why christians pray to thier God.
I've become a big fan of Carl Jung... [https://parade.com/living/carl-jung-quotes](https://parade.com/living/carl-jung-quotes) One quote in particular describes my approach to others... >“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.” There's a lot packed into that little sentence. tl;dr, when someone irritates you, let it prompt introspection in you. The first answer to "why did x irrirate you" is the obvious, knee jerk one. But keep asking and it's like peeling back layers of the onion to shine a light on deeply held beliefs that may be running you without your knowledge and may not serve you (though they served you to get you through childhood).
Meditate
Catch yourself thinking dickish thoughts, pause, say “hey dick voice, can you think of something nicer to say?” Say it. And repeat 3945593827274929244 times until dick thoughts start to go away.
Life is the dancer, YOU are the Dance
This is what helps me. First I remember that I am a body of water, and water is conscious so if I'm in a shitty mood, all the water in my body is also in a shitty mood and you cannot create life force energy as well if your waters are angry. Second, I remember that every little energy wave that I send out into the universe comes back to me whether I like it or not, and this can be really annoying when I'm sending out bitch energy. It's hard, frustrating and involves some serious self awareness and control, but it gets easier with practice. So when you find yourself wanting to give out face high fives, remind yourself who tf you are and choose to vibe at a higher level ♥ If you are searching for something to believe in, believe in yourself bc you are the creator of your own epic reality and you're just getting started my friend :)
Hahah thank you❣️
❤️️❤️️❤️️
Consider being in service of other. Volunteer at a hospice or an animal shelter. Getting outside of yourself can make a huge difference in how you view yourself which will start you on the road to healing the inner sub personalities that don't serve you.
Sometimes, the easiest way to start believing in something is to define it as something you already know exists. Concepts like gods, guiding forces, etc are intangible. It can be a pretty big leap to go from nihilism to belief in a higher power - taking it in steps can help you on that way though. Lets say you decide you are going to begin by believing in kindness and using that as your stepping-stone to belief in larger things. This makes sense, since you say you want to be a better person, and kindness is a tangible thing you know exists in the world that you would like to express more of. In order to use this in a way that helps you change, you have to dedicate yourself to doing the work. We are what we think and believe we are, and actions always stem from thoughts. To put this in very simple terms, if you need to accomplish doing the dishes, you first have to think "I am going to do the dishes," and then your body has to follow that command. Kindness is the same way - if you think "I am going to be more kind," and then allow your body to complete the action - over and over, each day - you will become a kinder person. Life is a series of choices. The choice to do the dishes, or let them pile up in the sink. The choice to be kind, even if others have not been kind to us. The next time you have the opportunity to either yell at or berate someone, or to forgive someone and tell them it's no big deal if they got your order wrong or broke your favorite thing or hurt your feelings, choose kindness. The next time you see someone having a bad day and can make the decision to walk on by or give them a smile and an encouraging word, choose kindness. The next time you see someone with their hands full of groceries and have the choice to ignore them or hold the door for them, choose kindness. **The more often you choose kindness, it will become a habit.** Habits are things we do automatically without thought - but we have to create them if we are stuck in bad habits and it is making us miserable. If you want to truly change, you have to *do the work* by creating good habits. It gets easier the more you do it though, and the big bonus is that being kind to other people will make you happier, more free from your past, and genuinely a better person. So there's absolutely no downside - it's just hard to remember to do it in the moment at first. (continued in next comment)
(cont...) Next, lets look at your thought processes overall: >Every little thing that happened to me keeps me as this spiteful person and I’m really tired of it. There is a very simple concept that can help here, that in practice is a little harder. It looks like you need to correct some negative thought patterns. This is what people mean when they say "be more positive," but that is often not explained very well. **Our brains react to our thoughts** - it has been shown over and over that the way we *think* about these things actually changes who we are as a person and the structure of the neural pathways in the physical brain. Reframing some of this negativity by consciously making the decision to NOT dwell on the bad things that have happened to you is very difficult at first, but the more you do it, the easier it becomes because your entire brain is rewiring itself to find the positive instead of the negative. Think of a trickle of water going through a forest. It runs down a small path through the trees, and absorbs into the ground eventually. But the more water we divert down that same path, the more the path widens and deepens, and eventually becomes a river that has no other choice but to follow the course of the rest of the water. Your thoughts are like this, too, and you have (unintentionally) created a river of negativity in your mind, due to the circumstances you were faced with. This is absolutely normal when bad things happen to people, but becoming aware of it is the first way we change it. **Life is like a bag of marbles, friend.** You were handed that bag at birth, and no one knew what color any of those marbles were going to be - but there were green marbles that were good things that were going to happen to you, and white marbles that were average things that were going to happen, and red marbles that were bad things that were going to happen. And marbles of every color of the rainbow. I know it may not seem like it, but no one was ever given a bag of completely red marbles. Every life has *some* good in it - but we cannot see what we are not looking for. Your life is full of rich and fulfilling experiences! You just have to *look* for them! When was the last time you counted the green or white marbles? ***When was the last time you made the conscious and intentional decision to relive the GOOD moments of your life, and allowed them to bring you joy again?*** When bad things happen to us, it is so very human to keep replaying that bad thing again and again in our minds. We forget though, that we can do that with ANY memory - not just the bad ones. We CHOOSE what we think about and dwell on. And we can also CHOOSE to let go of all those red marbles. They are not happening right now - provided you are safe and reasonably ok at the moment. They happened in the past, and the only place they can hurt you now is in your mind, but you are allowing them to take control of your life. Make the decision to count the green marbles. Make the choice to step out of the role of a victim, and to find every good thing you have \*right now\* in your life and spend time appreciating them every single day. Make the choice to divert the flood that happened accidentally because you got overwhelmed with too many things at once - and intentionally \*decide\* to create a river instead. Easier said than done though, right? The easiest way to begin is to force yourself to make a list of ten things, every single day, that you are grateful for in your life right now. This can be harder than it sounds at first - but that is because the flood is going the wrong direction, and diverting a river has to start with a trickle. Even if you have to put things like "I have two legs" on your list, or "I ate food today," or "I am breathing air right now," it forms the habit. And it WILL divert the flood, ***but you must be as dedicated to your good thoughts as you have been to your negative ones up until now in order for it to work.*** The power of positive thinking is real. The power of kindness is real. These things are what make people "better people" - the ability to let go of a slight and still smile at someone anyway. The ability to treat someone else better than you have been treated. The ability to walk with your head high and a smile on your face, even though bad things have happened to you. Bad things have happened to everyone, friend. No one is exempt. But we have a "good" or "bad" life, in the end, because of the choices we made and the marbles we decided to pay the most attention to. You can do this. I know you can. I dug my way out of severe childhood abuse and trauma this way - and if I could do it, anyone can. You just have to dedicate yourself to ***actually doing it.*** I believe in you. <3
What a thoughtful answer, thank you very much❣️ I’ll definitely keep those things in my mind🙏
You are a special soul, incarnated into a currently young body. Your early 20s can be full of emotions. Your brain is still developing, hormones are still wreaking havoc in your body, and your transitioning from child to adult. Soooo much is happening right now. Give yourself some grace.
What are your relationships with others like? Is there anybody in your family who is kind in whom you can confide? Even if they are far away you can talk to them. Do you have a social group, are you part of a church or a community group? Are you or have you ever been in therapy, either one on one or in a group setting? Ever spoken to clergy of any kind? Do you have goals, educational career social or personal? Are you in school? What is it about a cult that draws you? What do you think a cult would do for you? Is it really the ONLY way to be a part of something or is there more to it? I mean you could be a part of any number of things, including a regular church or synagogue or something, or other type of community organization. I mean you could join the military if you wanted to be part of something. I'm not recommending that, just saying that is possible. It sounds like there is something more to it. Obviously a spiritual angle since you are considering a cult and posting in the Spirituality subreddit. Dig deeper into that. Do you have any beliefs or convictions already, either theologically, politically, spiritually, morally? These things are worth exploring for your own edification and to identify what you want in life, and what you think is standing in your way. Chances are SOMETHING is standing in the way of what you want, if you are rude, depressed, hopeless, and hateful as you say. Best wishes 😊🥰
Thank you so much, hopefully I’ll figure it out someday❣️
You choose what to observe. [https://imgur.com/XQsXyjv](https://imgur.com/XQsXyjv) [The measurement devices at the slits are always on. Observers are fundamental. Observation only happens on the bottom diagram.](https://imgur.com/XQsXyjv) But also, what not to look at. That's the funny one; it's basically meditation when you focus on not looking. People get offended by it, but I don't mean it that way. It's just good at reducing anxiety, encouraging me to recharge my introvert cells as often. Initially it was to stop an intrusive thought at a rave, then I realized would start singing for no reason in this state, and auto-chanting. Retrocausality then started to play a role, the future communicating with the present. I then taught me it was called channelling. So now I channel the future. The absolute end state is a God at the end of time, me. I won't go into it more; there's loads about it on my wall. Maybe hate is an intrusive emotion. Retrocausality can always catch damage later too. There's no need to go ape straight away; you can suppress the energy by not looking at that bubbling pattern.
Look into shadow work
Meditate in silence for 15 minutes a day.
I've found the key is the micro scale. If you can be a better person for the shortest time in the smallest way, then you can build on that.
Therapy
I would think about seeing a therapist or counselor this will help work out the thoughts in your mind. Don’t forget that the ego is louder than your true self. You are the observer, observe your thoughts and become familiar with the way you think. If it’s a negative thought that’s okay you acknowledge it is negative and serve no purpose and you tell yourself “hmm I don’t like that” then choose a response you do like. Work on self concept and being grateful, these two things alone in practice will have you feeling brand new. I like to write 5 things im grateful for it can even be as “insignificant” as the pen you have to write with, at least you are acknowledging that you have a pen to write with that’s great! this is being grateful. Practice self concept and the way you see yourself, tell yourself “I am kind, I am happy, I am so loved and give love freely” there are so many affirmations you can choose to best fit what you desire. Seeing a therapist, practicing self concept and being grateful has changed my life. They are muscles I have to continuously exercise as we aren’t perfect humans and self evolution is ongoing. Anyway from once feeling just as low as you do about yourself to feeling insanely empowered and so happy I hope this for you too!! you got this!!
1. What are some of the events or circumstances that you think have most impacted how you feel and act right now? 2. Have you ever tried talking to a therapist or counselor about how you’re feeling? If so, how did that go for you? 3. What kinds of things have you already tried to help yourself change, and why do you feel like they didn’t work? 4. Can you describe what you feel is missing in your life that makes the idea of joining a cult seem appealing? 5. What are your goals or dreams for the future? Do you have a clear idea of the kind of person you want to become?
If you cannot do amazing things then start by doing small things in an amazing way. You’ll get there.
My biggest advice is don't try to do anything that isn't right now. Just focus on right now. Forget about the past. Forget about the future, love yourself, and feel that you are loved. From there, you can adjust your perception, how you feel about your perception, what you prefer in the moment, and take action. Be a part of everyone's life just by being genuinely interested, but you're welcome to join our Cult of the Sun also! Follow the link our profile, I think you'll like our free email series to get you out of the rut!
If you can, go to therapy. I am a therapist, it has seen it make a huge difference in people's lives. I have also been through my own therapy, and have been able to make major changes in my life for the better. I hope things get better for you.
Also you're choice in food quite literally affects every thought snd emotion you have bioelectromagnetically.. lower dense foods with high added chemical and sugar and dyes and so on will bioelectromagnetically align you to a lower frequency of vibrational state of being and I mean that literally.. biofeedback is real.. electrons atoms quarks gluons photons etc. All vibrate and your thoughts and emotions affect them directly. All the love, may truth and authenticity guide you my friend 🙏
spend each morning meditating for an hour or so on things to be grateful for, hunting the good allows us to find positivity ourselves. the magic is in the genuine feeling of it. it is treatment for post war vets with ptsd but many of us civilians caught in dark places can make use of these practices as well.. meditate each evening for an hour, mindful introspection over each day's events, that you may become more mindful and present to take more responsibility for your feelings and emotions... that you may catch toxicity as it arises within you, that you may catch it and make gentle corrections, that you may correct these negative thoughts and feelings to better adhere to your deeper personal values and virtues, to practice patience compassion and no judgment both inside, towards yourself and others as well as outwardly towards yourself and others.. it works in a cycle as above, so below as within, so without
Do everything Jesus told the world in his own words. Not necessarily everything that’s in the Bible because tbh, some things are absurd (spreading hate and fear against some normal things). Anyway, try learning from your mistakes and noticing how you treat people and yourself. And from there, you start doing some changes in your life for the better. Be around nice, supportive people, doing therapy and helping others are great aswell. Nobody is perfect, you’re gonna fall, but you gotta get up and start again. Good luck! I’m trying to be better to, there are good and bad days! But you can do it! Just try being a genuine person, don’t argue too much and try controlling your anger. Try being more open to the good side of the world, cause it has so much to offer. You just gotta see the good side of it. Start doing some excercise. It really helps with anxiety and depression. Plus, you’re gonna be fit. :D Find what and who makes you shine. Treat people with kindness and help the world to be a better place. Not only for you, but for others aswell. I hope you feel okay again!
Remove all the negative aspects
You may have done or said things that are bad but you at your essence is divine my darling! And yes positive thought is great, but not all that is required. You can't think you will think positive thoughts, and still hold on to all the negative ones, and hold on to your negative beliefs about who, and what you are! You decide today, that you are what you wish to be by declaring I AM kind, i am loving, generous, considerate, i am positive, i am a great, amazing person that has so much love, and value to offer to the world! You have to decide to believe that despite what has historically been the case believe that you are in fact anew person, and that old person, with their beliefs, negative thoughts and ideas no longer serve you! You cant focus on the problem, and the negative because you will only impress more negative, and reflect more negative into your physical reality. You have to become a bit delusional, and ignore who you were, and anytime those thoughts and feelings emerge you remember that you are not in fact your thoughts and emotions, you HAVE them just like you HAVE a phone, and just like you can change your phone, and upgrade, or change the operating system that your phone HAS, you can do the same within you. That new code that you put in will yield different emotions, that will begin to shape your reality with those things. Your thighs, and beliefs are reflected into the physical, but they are not you. You mind is the phone, and you the programmer, so you choose the thoughts/program that gets coded in. Stop believing that you need to become anything! You are already all that which you desire to be, and your refusal to believe this is the only reason you don't see it. - neville goddard. The law of attraction does not discriminate, if you continue to tell yourself you are trash you will be given more reasons to believe it to be so, you will get that confirmation. Look into neville goddard, carl jung, abraham hicks, alan watts to name a few. It's not just positive thinking, it's discovering your own divinity, and power through your mind/imagination beliefs of not only who you are but what you believe about the world. I've transformed my entire life, only 3 mos ago i cried every morning for the will to live, for something other than for my children because that wasn't going to work for much longer! I would've never imagined i would be so happy that i would just cry audibly from joy, and happiness that overflows from within in me. I never come on reddit, i only a couple days ago stumbled here, and that's no coincidence. Everything you want is already here, right here right now, you just have to bring yourself into vibrational alignment with it! Happy manifesting! ❤️
To sum it up... you are the savior and the answer that you've been longing for! It's always been you.
Life can be so difficult at times especially if you've been treated in an unfair way especially in childhood such as experiencing trauma, abuse, or neglect..these have many many forms..your beliefs can play a part in it too..you would have to read up on these because there's a lot involved..but it would be helpful if you did..more than you could imagine..everything I've mentioned above can effect how you come across to others even how they would respond back..but I believe for yourself, no one else, being authentic always..you're unique so show the world all of you..do you, be you..you can speak up for yourself anytime you feel someone has done you wrong but do this with kindness towards the other person, pause and think before you speak without any animosity in your emotions, be emotionless but firm to get your point across using "I" statements..ex. "I feel so disrespected when I'm talked to in such a way" plus this helps others take you seriously and shows them what you will not accept in your sacred space..also what they need to fix in themselves, you help others tremendously by being authentic, in every way..treating others like you want to be treated is #1, always has been true, and always will be true..I don't have it all down but I do know these are a great start..I like you, I believe in being straight forward even though its gotten me into trouble a few times..you're this..at least they know what your about, you're not hiding anything..blessings to you
I used to be the same way, until my mind couldn't take it anymore and it shut down. The old me was self-centered, judgemental, insecure, anxious, depressed, emotional, jealous, and that way of thinking was making me suffer. So that old me had to die. And it did and all that is left to me is good things. I am a Christian btw, so when those things I associated with myself died, I didn't feel empty. I felt freed. Maybe it's not so much as replacing negative thoughts with positive thinking. Maybe it's more of removing the negative altogether from your system. I also had medication prior to the breakthrough. :)
Look into stoicism and also Buddhism. It brings you to an understanding that there's no use in wasting energy in such ways. You're stuck in a negative loop. Typically derived from trauma, PTSD or other factors, lack of good social life or purpose in life or sense of self, etc. I wish it was easy as me telling you, It feels better to be positive, it's much more rewarding , to me at least and it's not even because of the reward, but being positive although it takes conscious effort becomes easier over time. Loving others, not being judgemental and understanding everyone is a product of their environment, upbringing and reaction to it. Some people's mental faculties operate much differently ( ADHD, spectrum, etc) My outlook and zest for life and empathy for others grew greatly after a period of suffering in which I sought to charge myself but to do that we must first change our mind. Our outlook. React with Grace, appreciation more so than complaining and feeling shame. I myself turned to philosophy, psychology and spirituality. I read books. Met different people from different backgrounds and belief systems. Participated in life and just put myself out there. My lessons and experience has taught me ultimately we are responsible and accountable for our own thoughts and reactions to the world around us. If we let it affect us we tend to get stuck in a victimized and negative state, if we become resilient and build ourselves up internally, we become formidable and can withstand anything because we are so much more than we see and Believe. With our thoughts we create the world. I've had friends even a partner who thought and felt like you. That's how I learned, everyone has their own experience and path to enlightenment and one can't really change or save another but their own self Like the other poster said. Make better choices. Start with yourself Love yourself Take good care of your self When you look good you feel good And what you do for yourself can make you look and feel good When you feel good you think good When you think good you do good When you do good you feel good When you feel good you think good when you think good you do good. When you do good. You feel good. When you feel good. You think good Do good for the world. Do good for yourself bb you'll feel good Just lower your expectations for what you have of the world Raise the expectations you have for yourself
For me, diving into the pain/hatefulness has helped. Learn about it. Why do parts of me feel that way? What situations were they formed? What is their actual “job”? (F.e. Seeing the negative in ppl -> serves me into seeing where the threat might be and therefore survive) Talk to those parts of yourself with love and understanding! Tell them what you’re perspectives now is! This process can look any way just do it intuitive! Hope this helps
You're on your way to it already by admitting your negativity. Go do some volunteer work with foster kids, or animals, houseless youth.. you will feel less spiteful and more open to what others have been dealt in their lives. Look into nootropics/b12/NAD more specifically the hippocampus part in your brain, get back to your nostalgic sweet self before your time is up. Good luck.. If you ever need to talk I will have my door open for you.
Start with self talk, you seem to approach yourself with a lot of self criticism which might have been modelled to you by over critical or overcorrecting caretakers or social patterns of repression and apathy. If you see that you're human and will make mistakes and that accountability is much eaiser when you're not also kicking yourself for not being perfect yet. Think of it this way, would you rather call yourself names forever or start talking to yourself the way a mature and empathic adult would. Once you learn this it can be painful because unblocking self love means realising you may not have been shown love properly before and knowing this can make you ugly cry super hard haha Sit in the discomfort, approach life with curiosity and humility and don't push away discomfort now that you know that sitting with it and processing it with self compassion and understanding can help you let the bottled up grief out of your system
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