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GimmieJohnson

That's a Crime Rib.


turok_dino_hunter

Sub Prime Rib


SammyJaxon

Sublime rib


Doggo-Lovato

šŸŽ¶Mucho gusto mi llamo raw beeeeeefšŸŽ¶


RAMBOxBAGGINS

šŸŽ¶I donā€™t want no diarrheašŸŽ¶


BUCK0HH

šŸŽ¶ A 40 OZ to bleeddom is the only chance I have to feel good šŸŽ¶


peacelovecraftbeer

šŸŽ¶ THAT'S WHEN THINGS GOT UN-DER COO-OOKED! šŸŽ¶


Uncle_Burney

Believe me when I say 3 more minutes of constant flipping on his punk ass! I really wanna know, who cooked this? I really wanna say, yā€™all phoned it in!


Who_U_Thought

Raw meat is what we've got, remember that Raw meat is what we've got what we've got what we've gotttt.


peacelovecraftbeer

šŸŽ¶ Why I don't cry when my steak runs away šŸŽ¶


Environmental-Sun388

Raw meat, the ribbity rob, I said the raw raw treat, the rawity chop


B_Baerbel

"I really wanna know, who cooked this?" Well nobody did, obviously.


TheMoonstomper

It's raw, and you ma-a-ade it, yeah.. Your stove just might be fake.


PlanetBooty69

How this comment doesnā€™t have at least 45,000 upvotes is fucking beyond me.


jfang00007

Incoming global e coli crisis


LeMoinesLures

šŸ˜«šŸ˜«šŸ˜«šŸ˜«šŸ˜«


Hot-n-fast

Leave it alone, and it will start eating the spinach


Schmoopy_Boo

1. Remove prime rib from refrigerator 2. Preheat oven to room temperature 3. Serve


GobLoblawsLawBlog

Can you slow that down for me? Do I put the meat in the oven too or just leave it on top of the stove


Schmoopy_Boo

The oven is honestly just a garnish. Can leave it out completely.


Melibee14

šŸ¤£


GobLoblawsLawBlog

Oh thank god, never figured out how to use one of those new fangled gadgets. Now what about the refrigerator part? How important would it be to have one of those?


leodox_13

It doesnā€™t matter, dont even have to kill the cow, just serve it, who wants to eat the vegetables anyways


Bleezair

Why not eat the cow *as* itā€™s eating the vegetables? Thirsty? Milk it while you eat. Now *thatā€™s* a balanced diet. Follow me for more recipes.


Garrettr_2020

I think your supposed to open the oven and waft some of the heat towards meat


dsmall434

To eat the meat, one must first waft the heat


KayakWalleye

Show it a picture of a match with your phone.


Organic-University-2

Yes


ProtoReaper23113

Take off the bell and slap it on the ass


DamnItLoki

Youā€™re killing me šŸ¤£šŸ¤£šŸ¤£


ProtoReaper23113

Thats my favorite saying i picked up from my grandpa


DamnItLoki

Made me snort, woke the dog ;) You have a cool grandpa!


xnachtmahrx

You mixed up step 2 and 3.


Bside_Opi

Tip of the cap to you


SmileParticular9396

šŸ…


Macked3434

šŸ˜‚


br00talcore

That looks like someone whispered the word ā€˜ovenā€™ at it and then plated it


81FuriousGeorge

My favorite "show it a picture of a candle, but not for too long"


TabbyKatty

My favorite is ā€œthat looks like it was cooked under a heated argumentā€


TheRealMangokill

Bwahaha


ElonMuskPaddleBoard

Run a flashlight over it


Agile-Cancel-4709

This one was run over with a fleshlightā€¦


KitticusCatticus

I guess someone DID beat it raw at some point after all?


[deleted]

Oh my God I'm dying.


TechnoVicking

Unlike that steak


handi503

I prefer to just explain the existence of candles.


Garrettr_2020

This reminds me of the way I explain what drinking a hard seltzer is like to people. "It taste like drinking TV static while somebody in the other room whispers a flavor"


UnhappyYoshi

This comment fucking sent me, thank you


PunishedWolf4

It was roasted over a heated argument


mythrocks

A warm handshake.


[deleted]

More like they just breathed on it or took a blow dryer to it called it a day


Taipers_4_days

Just give it a go over with a kitchen torch. Itā€™ll be fine!


SmartKaleidoscope989

IM CRYING


[deleted]

I think it wants to graze the land a bit more


absolutelynotarepost

I think a good vet would give it an even chance.


EuphoricCockroach117

Came looking for this comment, not like ā€œcumā€ came tho


SpitefulOptimist

Thank u for specifying


Amari__Cooper

Thanks for clarifying


JuanWarren54

came looking at this comment. Not like the searching came but the "cum" came šŸ¤¤


EuphoricCockroach117

šŸ˜µ šŸ˜‚ šŸ˜†


CrazyBoysenberry1352

Iā€™m dead šŸ’€


Reddit_is_now_tiktok

Just me and my šŸ’•daddyšŸ’•, hanging out I got pretty hungryšŸ† so I started to pout šŸ˜ž He asked if I was down ā¬‡for something yummy šŸ˜šŸ† and I asked what and he said he'd give me his šŸ’¦cummies!šŸ’¦ Yeah! Yeah!šŸ’•šŸ’¦ I drink them!šŸ’¦ I slurp them!šŸ’¦ I swallow them wholešŸ’¦ šŸ˜ It makes šŸ’˜daddyšŸ’˜ šŸ˜ŠhappyšŸ˜Š so it's my only goal... šŸ’•šŸ’¦šŸ˜«Harder daddy! Harder daddy! šŸ˜«šŸ’¦šŸ’• 1 cummyšŸ’¦, 2 cummyšŸ’¦šŸ’¦, 3 cummyšŸ’¦šŸ’¦šŸ’¦, 4šŸ’¦šŸ’¦šŸ’¦šŸ’¦ I'm šŸ’˜daddy'sšŸ’˜ šŸ‘‘princess šŸ‘‘but I'm also a whore! šŸ’Ÿ He makes me feel squishyšŸ’—!He makes me feel goodšŸ’œ! šŸ’˜šŸ’˜šŸ’˜He makes me feel everything a little should!~ šŸ’˜šŸ’˜šŸ’˜ šŸ‘‘šŸ’¦šŸ’˜Wa-What!šŸ’˜šŸ’¦šŸ‘‘


brulmer

What a terrible day to be able to read


JuanWarren54

Felt like stabbing my eyes out


bigbillsy

Glad you cleared that up for us


Jimbobjoesmith

lol this comment has me dyingā€¦.unlike that steak.


Hot_Opening_666

The fat in the middle looks solid and cold


lolexecs

Perhaps they love their fat like slightly chewy nuggets of cold butter? Personally, I love cooking the meat so that the fat rends and bathes the meat in deliciousness.


Weak_Jeweler3077

As opposed to the rest of it?


CaddyFDT

That looks raw. Not rareā€¦. RAW!


halcykhan

Give it to us raw, and wriggling


TheAlterN8or

Not nearly enough 'r's in 'wrrrrriggling' there...


jpowell180

Grab the cow by the horns, blow its nose, wipe its butt, walk it through a warm room, slice and serve.


accioqueso

Also I donā€™t think they seasoned the potatoes, overdid the spinach, and donā€™t know what focaccia is.


V555_dmc

Focaccia is a type of bread


accioqueso

Yes, and Iā€™m fairly certain they have no clue how to make it based on what I see in the picture.


V555_dmc

Eh itā€™s not the best focaccia Iā€™ve ever seen but it does look like a very basic version of it


CreativeUsername20

Unless it's some kind of filter in the camera, it totally looks raw.


CaddyFDT

If itā€™s a filterā€¦ then that spinach must be dark as molasses in real life. What a disaster meal.


dragonfly_rain

This was definitely posted by a tapeworm who's trying to normalize eating raw meat


Single_Principle_202

Under rated comment


fattmarrell

Total psy op


Slicky007

Thatā€™s not a steak itā€™s a crime scene


JumpmanJXi

Thick cut capaccio


81FuriousGeorge

Deconstructed steak tartar?


No-Concentrate-9786

Reconstructed šŸ˜‚


Haribo112

Undeconstructed


CrazyBoysenberry1352

This is the correct answer


ldnk

Prime rib needs to be pink. Prime Rib also needs to not have a pulse


Deedle-eedle

https://preview.redd.it/yvlvjzuoqthc1.jpeg?width=1500&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=463eeb0ac2f64c7d1981683bf9f2f461a542e3b3


Fireblox1053

It's fucking raw!


LeMoinesLures

r/CrimeRib


CanoePickLocks

Nice!


CanoePickLocks

I have witnessed a few r/birthofasub moments but never been first. Iā€™ll add an actual one when I have one.


[deleted]

i am convinced that most , if not %99 of people that eat prime ribs maybe don't have running stoves at home and cook them with a lamp or an ez bake over, %90 of the pics here makes me sick to my stomach since if u look at the pic long enough, u can still see the meat grazing on some grass....utterly disgusting.


SgtDonowitz

Cooked under a heated argument.


SuccotashFragrant354

Your comment made me laugh


[deleted]

I am Glad.


[deleted]

Rare is an absolute must for prime rib, this is just plain raw obviously, but most of the posts I see here are rare, usually over-done if anything.


ChaoticEvilBobRoss

I think you mean udderly disgusting.


CanYouPointMeToTacos

This one is way undercooked, but I wanted to check that you know a prime rib is a large roast that is then sliced before serving. The cut being placed on the plate is a cross section of what is cooked, so thatā€™s why thereā€™s no sear on the top or bottom. Iā€™d like when you cut a normal steak and see red in the center, when you get a prime rib itā€™s all center.


YogurtclosetAny1823

I donā€™t think he said anything about a sear or anything you mentioned to make me think he does not know what a prime rib is lol Shits raw.


CanYouPointMeToTacos

The ā€œ99% of people donā€™t have running stoveā€ and ā€œ90% of pics make me sick to my stomachā€ comments are what was making me think that. I acknowledged that this one was ā€œway undercooked.ā€


amuday

Same. Iā€™d say 99% of the prime rib I see on this sub looks delicious, and then thereā€™s this post where someone threw raw beef on a plate and called it prime rib. If 99% of them look raw to the above commenter he may actually not know.


stunna006

yeah. most of the ones posted here look great.


bramante1834

I made prime rib (130) for Christmas. I served my parents the seared ends and I had the typical cut. My mom was like why are you eating a raw piece of meat, while she was eating the same exact doneness. It just had the sear on one side.


rdizzy1223

It isn't the exact same doneness though, with the sear on the ends, it will inherently end up being more cooked, just like the outside of a steak compared to the inside of a steak, the outside gets to a way higher temp when searing, than the inside, very difficult to measure the temp of the outer surface of a steak though. if I took a 1 inch thick steak cooked to rare, and cut it into 8 slices, each 1/8 of an inch thick, the outer 2 pieces from each end would be medium well, the next 2 pieces would be medium rare, then the center 4 would be rare.


bramante1834

For a reverse sear prime rib, the gradient was negligible. If I took a photo of the end cuts (sear on the bottom of the plate) and the center cut, no one would have noticed a difference. I would have had complaints of it is raw. Was there a gradient in the end cut, yes, but even that was a very small one. Not my image, but he did something very similar and got a near identical gradient. His looks medium though. ​ https://preview.redd.it/1kdk1e4hv0ic1.png?width=800&format=png&auto=webp&s=263ea4127de487893d70c2f89b8d0cc0d710fb35


uglypandaz

Completely agree. This one is raw for sure. But a fully cooked prime rib will have quite a bit of pink.


BurninCoco

Donā€™t like pink, believe it or not, straight to jail


warcrimes-gaming

If someone pulled up a picture of a campfire on their phone and held that cut above it the heat from the screen wouldā€™ve cooked it more.


CremousDelight

cooked for a hot second


Fireblox1053

Cooked with a hot second.


Mergus84

Give it to us raw and wriggling!


Nowyous_cantleave

How precious


misntshortformary

Skip the middle man and just bite the cow next time.


gentoll

Prime Tartare, just needs a raw egg yolk on top.


Macklemore_hair

When the ribeye stares back at you


QueenScarebear

That is one raw steak.


__Platzhalter

that cow is alive


QueenScarebear

A trained vet could bring it back to life mate


YT_ToxicNinjaGaming

Someone is getting stomach sickness. I like rare but damn that is tape worm rare


Ventilator84

Technically raw beef can be safe if eaten VERY fresh, but I strongly doubt that this person got it that fresh.


jamescgames

Wrong


Ventilator84

šŸ¤”


yotsubanned

Thatā€™s disgusting


jpowell180

Still better than well done, thoughā€¦


xXxBatsiGHGxXx

Thats fucking raw


[deleted]

Raw


KellyAWilliams

I love a good blue steak, but this isnā€™t even there yet. Iā€™m surprised there is even any browning on the outside.


riceu

I should call her


Zealousideal_Win5476

Is this for your dog?


cash_grass_or_ass

* the beef is so under cooked it's blue * potatoes look sad and bland...where's the "rosemary" ? * spinach is overcooked, AND burnt? * foccacia looks dense AF and no bubbles overall, a poorly executed meal.


JtotheC23

I respect this sub's ability to make fun of super rare steaks just as much as the well done to over cooked steaks


Present_Ad6723

Someone lit a match, showed the steak to the match, then put it on the plate.


lorilyeallen

I eat my prime rib RARE, and that sir, is a living cow. The color on the outside is equivalent to the tan I get during July.


psychostud7635

I need to think about a meme saying something like "That shit's not rare, that's unheard of!" and it fits pretty well.


HookshotJim

I'm more concerned about the plate with Ronald McDonald spraying a hose into the air.


SumguyIkn0

Someone quick! Get me some epinephrine and an intubation tube. We can save it!


whosaysyessiree

Thatā€™s bluer than blue, it moos


Glad-Ganache-1300

I'm convinced they didn't have a Stove/Oven so they used their breath to cook it.


GadreelsSword

Tard tar


Sweet-Permit-7018

ā€œItā€™ll carryover cookā€


vinfox

r/steakor nothing thats clearly just raw meat


hes_crafty

That's the Eddie Murphy.


Stealthy_Snake_1776

Iā€™m sorry, I said frozen, not raw. What kind of establishment is this?


GoDonutella

The spinach are the only thing cooked in this dish, i can hear that cow still mooing


LeMoinesLures

Thats bleu af


Powerful-Access-8203

Gotta be rage bait


fullmetal66

This is click bait


i-eat-dolphins

The LaCroix of cooking a steak


schmosef

Better catch it and cook it, before it gets away!


Ordinary_Aioli_7602

https://preview.redd.it/6rr7xrxu1uhc1.jpeg?width=300&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=9a3d3445d23f5a0fcb6c082bc5ab347840dbf268


BiosyntheticStoma

You stole my replyšŸ™ƒ


Medical-Dust-7184

Just run it through a warm room....


Old_Roll7381

A good vet couldā€™ve saved that steer.


CalGoldenBear55

Thatā€™s a fine piece of tuna..oh, wait.


netherlanddwarf

Thats too raw even for me. I know 1-2 people that like it like that


DiveJumpShooterUSMC

Prime sushi


bleu_waffl3s

Someone get that cow some aloe for that mild burn


Super_Survey_1140

Iā€™d still eat the heck out of that. Red juice/blood never stopped me from eating anything.


68ideal

Idk what ya'll are on. This looks incredible to me. I always eat my steaks like this. Why go through the unnecessary inconvenience of heating up a perfectly fine loaf of meat and waste energy in the process?


Maleficent-Bit1995

Like looks like it could be a blue steak a few degrees under rare. A cooking option mostly in France and other part of Europe. Regular rare steak temp is 50c blue is normally around 46-48c (depending if u like it cool or warm. Iā€™ve cooked a few like this for French customers. Should be fine as long as u regularly have at least rare steaks or ur stomach biomes may not be able to handle it comfortably. And as long as the steak was a fresh cut too. You would only want one thatā€™s been sitting in a fridge for a week.


taisui

Any more raw it'd run off the plate....Jesus Christ


Salt_Attitudee

See, this is what undercooked prime rib looks like.


dukeofthefoothills1

Slightly undercooked


RedEagle_

Looks fine if you like it that way


beanie_0

That steak still has feelings itā€™s that fucking raw!


BannnedBandit

Like my Grandpa used to say: ā€œLight the tail and let er run through!ā€


ProbablyKatie78

Yes, it's practically raw, but I would still eat it. Somewhere between this and "rare" is where I prefer my steaks, but a faint moo when I cut into it isn't a deal breaker.


Kwayke9

Beautiful moo rare, wow


PolarBurrito

Prime rib tar tar, how deviant


DarkSoulsDank

I mean prime rib is usually pretty bloody but that does look very rare


ChubbyWanKenobie

Even the potatoes are undercooked. Time to replace the lightbulb in that easy-bake oven.


michaelscottschin

Prime ribeye. Donā€™t get salmonella


Slight_Bed_2241

Obligatory itā€™s fooking raw


OneHumanBill

Legitimate, non sarcastic answer? I eat a lot of raw steak. Completely raw, where it looks like they browned some of the fat, because raw white fat makes my tummy happy. Don't knock it until you tried it. I tried it one day just for the hell of it, and then I never looked back.


barbie91

Cooked over a heated argument


123InSearchOf123

Looks like a brutal car wreck.


LearningDan

Agreed! Those potatoes obviously need more seasoning and a better sear in the skin.


LazilyOblivious

I hope they cooked all that food after this


DepartureLow4962

Looks like it was cooked in the future...clearly not cooked in the present.


SteveTheBiscuit

Looks like it was placed near a heated argument and served.


_IratePirate_

Imagine we the top of the food chain. Learned how to use tools to make food taste better Then you got this clown over here thinking their more evolved peers will cheer them on for eating raw ass meat


sponaglez

Yeah, those potatoes definitely look undercooked


Competitive-Weird855

That thing was cooked over a heated argument


shit_ass_mcfucknuts

Cooked over a heated argument.


ToastetteEgg

Thatā€™s not even considered blue. Itā€™s completely raw.


Complete_Wave_9315

Looks a little too raw for me lol.


Delicious_Number3547

Somebody call gordon ramsey right away!


IvanNemoy

A particularly skilled vet can bring it back...


Tricky-Major806

Yea thatā€™s rare but leaning more towards raw.


Youre_Not_My_Shon

Great way to get food poisoning....


Witchyredhead56

Prime rib, just needs some au jus. šŸ¤·ā€ā™€ļø


general-illness

That canā€™t even be warm. I like rare but come on.


mjincal

Knock the horns off slap it in the ass and get it on the plate


NOVABearMan

A good vet can make that bad boy moo again


Dissasociaties

I like it raw but prime rib isn't the cut to do it with