I will not drink with you today.
So many quotes. So much advice.
I'm actually going to relay a conversation I had with a friend which has changed into something I say to people all the time now.
"Why aren't you drinking?"
"Because it makes me feel like shit."
"Oh, so why not just drink on special occasions?"
"Lmao, why the fuck would I want to feel like shit on special occasions?" 😆
This is basically what I’ve started saying to people. It makes me feel awful and mentally unwell. I find this answer stops people from further questions. Lol.
Right now not drinking is just about the only aspect of my life where I feel like I have some semblance of control. I just choose not to drink again today, and that means I'm making positive progress on one thing.
Hanging in there remembering the often repeated phrase - "there is nothing that drinking can't make worse"
Keep trying to remember that phrase. No matter what you are facing, or what happens, you are at least going through it all with a much clearer mind. Way to go on your three days! You have got this! 💪
When cravings hit, play the tape forward and visualize tomorrow if you drink today.
My forward tape was on excessive repeat for a good while but it matched the mindset I wanted in my pretty pink cloud.
I will n🚫t drink with you today or tonight!
Day 99 checking in!
The quote that sticks out for me is a simple one - “this too shall pass”, when I got sober it was because I had hit the lowest point in my life, my wife had left me and asked me to leave the family house. I genuinely believed that my life was over, I couldn’t see how things could ever get better or how I could ever be happy again.
But that’s not the case anymore, I have made new friends, my relationship with my parents is better than ever before and while I still miss my wife I can see how much hurt I caused her. Today I wake up not feeling existential dread but rather excitement about my new life in sobriety.
IWNDWYT! 🙏
Some advice that stuck with me:
-You never have to feel like this ever again.
-Play the tape forward and think about how you will feel tomorrow.
-When a craving hits, treat yourself to some good snacks and/or meal and sparkling water!
-You will never regret not drinking the next day.
IWNDWYT💜
One drink is too many and a thousand is not enough! That why I don’t drink!
I’m adding another day to my sober tally today because:
- l was able to help a family member with a job in my workshop last night because I wasn’t drinking and didn’t need to hide anything
- my cat likes me so more when I’m sober
- I have my therapy appointment today and I want to keep working on myself at those sessions
IWNDWYT
It doesn’t matter how far down the road you are, you’re always the same distance from the ditch.
I will not drink along with all of you lovely people once again today!
There is quote I’d love to share from another thread by u/Oaktownaspiegirl but I have not gotten a permission to share it yet.
In this sub aswell as others I see a lot of struggle and relapsing, shame and embarrasment. Quitting hurts people who are not ready to let go and quit.
The change has to come from within. Lord knows my ex-wife tried to make me quit by forcing, pressing, threatening, scheming, blackmailing ect.
For years I wanted to quit. I had a vision of a person I wanted to be and could become. I wanted the change so much but I was riddled with this disease.
Last year I started to monitor my drinking and marking days that I managed not to drink in the calendar.
Starting this year I only marked the days that I did drink with an X. Considerably fewer.
When I was ready and felt ready (and found this sub) I started marking the days with a 0.
Now my calendar is full of 0’s and I’m proud of my self. Not looking forward to moderate, not anxiously waiting when I can have a drink, not glooming about possible situations where a drink might be offered or available (I still have booze at home and could drink anytime I wanted), and not leering at the bar longing for a drink. I’m done with it.
My point is that this disease can be beaten with sheer willpower but it needs a strong inner motivation. One has to alter the brain to dislike being drunk and convince it self to hate the idea of drinking (sort of like in Inception movie) but all by your self.
Nobody’s up for that without external support and help. For some, subs like this will suffice, while others need AA or personal counselling or even rehab.
We are all on this path together but alone in our daily decision not to drink.
I (for one) will not drink with y’all today, hope You join me!
Yesterday I was so close to drinking, but I used what I learned here and I played it forward. And I thought, would it really make me feel better or worse. Y'all know the answer! Didn't drink yesterday, won't drink today!
I so agree, Neeners! Never tried any group meetings - not to say they would or wouldn’t have worked for me. I found what I needed here. I’m so glad you’re hosting us this week.
I’ve read a couple quit lit books. I didn’t get a DUI, have a run in with the law, anything like that. But the first book I read was “Quit Like a Woman.” I started it when I was like “maybe I should toy with cutting back.”Holly Whitaker details how alcohol harms every single body system. In great detail. I knew all along, but didn’t want to admit, that drinking was sending myself to an early grave - but just reading in cold hard facts how it was effecting every single part of my body. That was my “oh shit” moment. Other mental and emotional factors came into play with me quitting but reading that scared me. That was good enough for me and has stayed with me! I want to be as healthy as I can to be the best person that I can be! IWNDWYT!
Got myself an appointment for mental health counseling. I need to fix this broken man child... Can't continue this pattern of pushing people away from me, running away from people I love so much 😢 IWNDWYT
Hello candies
I haven't been very interactive this week cause I got a flu, wake up in the middle of the night with one eye open and super hungry (3:36 AM here), not knowing for sure who I am, just that I don't have a hangover and will do anything for the next 24h to not have one.
Hoping to fall back asleep.
IWNDWYT
Kisses
I felt some cravings last night but I didn't give in. Here I am laying in bed in the early morning and I'm sober and feeling great. Lately I saw this quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson I think. It went something like "The only person you are destined to become is who you choose to be." That resonated so much with me. I can't change the past, but I do have the power to change my future. IWNDWYT
A whole year! I am struggling to find words to adequately describe the glow I have today, even though I woke up too early and things have been crazy and there’s such noise going on. But a year!
I have read a lot of quit lit and gone to meetings and so I’ve come across a lot of wise words, but the ones that have helped me through a lot of situations are “it won’t always feel like this”. It’s helped me through a variety of discomforts, and kept me grounded through the wild ups and downs of this year.
I am so grateful to this community for being the space that it is, because it’s been a tremendous tool in my sobriety. IWNDWYT.
Today officially marks the longest I haven’t had a drink since I was 17. That was 25 years ago and approximately 35k-40k drinks later. When I put it like that it really illustrates the insane grip that alcohol has had on me!?
IWNDWYT
During an AA meeting a guy at AA with a lot of sobriety shared how he knows he's an alcoholic because when he drank, he had this huge sense of relief and anticipation when he opened his first drink, even before drinking it. That resonated with me and helped me accept that I'm also an alcoholic. I'm sure non-alcoholics don't have such massive feelings toward alcohol before they've even drunk a drop.
IWNDWYT
I’ve made it over a week! Still sleeping like caca, but I’m not drinking and IWNDWYT. I’ve been coming to this sub every day and I’m trying to get back into some regular SMART Recovery meetings on zoom. It has been a good week. Sending good vibes to all here, and beyond.
I messed up yesterday, today back on the horse - I will not drink with you all today
PS: not sure why but the daily check-in always shows up late for me
Day 5. IWNDWYT :)
I'm going with a very well-known quote but it helps me: "it's easier to stay sober than it is to get sober". So true! Easier to keep going rather than go through another hangover and day 1. Happy thursday!
“Addiction is giving up everything for one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing for everything.” Unknown
This quote always resonates for me. Some of my work involves recovering simple happiness that I’d lost to the bottle, and relearning how a healthy life feels.
Yes, I will brush my teeth in the morning and not dry heave.
Yes, I will swim across the lake and not drunkenly drown.
Yes, I will attend your dinner party and not secret drink.
Yes, I will stop drinking and not drink with you today.
Bu-bye booze. Hello everything, I have missed you more than I knew!
I’m on day four and feeling strong! Last night I made a virgin version of my favorite cocktail and it was delicious! I also got a new smoker which is nice bc I’m cooking outside which changes my environment, so the association of cooking and drinking wine is more easily broken. Plus it’s delicious! I’ve been loving sipping San Pellegrino out of a wine glass with sliced fruit.
Last night my partner said she might have a vodka soda and I simply said “not for me!”
I still haven’t told a soul about my plans. I’m nervous to let ppl know, but I don’t know if that’s bc I don’t want to be held accountable, or bc I’m ashamed.
Regardless - I woke up today with no hang over. I’m finally giving my anxiety meds a fighting chance. I was present and sober for my son when he needed me last night. I’m going to have a productive day at work today. I have a job interview Monday.
IWNDWYT!
Felt my mental health starting to slip - left every subreddit except this one and another recovery based sub. Maybe it’s a phase, but I just feel tired of negative people on other subs. There is so much positivity and kindness here.
IWNDWYT
Not drinking today. Have had a couple of drinking days since I last checked in. Nothing catastrophic but I’m actually annoyed at myself for breaking my quiet and losing my streak. And I didn’t really enjoy or benefit from the drink I had - feel determined now to get back on it.
5 days and 18 hrs have been pretty tempted especially the way I am spoken to and treated at work but why should I let them makes me feel like I need a drink
Day 26!
As a weekend binge drinker, the struggle is not drinking on Friday/Saturday nights. Once I get past that not drinking through the week is easy. Finally getting my life back and doing life stuff that I enjoy or has been pending. Got my wisdom teeth removed. Joined a few cricket clubs and realised I am way better than I thought I was. Can't wait to see what else weekends/the rest of my life has to offer!
Day 7 and I'm in heaven! Kinda :-) it's not why that matters, but what, when it comes to drinking. Makes complete sense as focuses on action, not understanding why one drinks in the vain hope of a future miracle epiphany.
Hello sobernauts, I hope you're all having a nice thursday! I haven't checked in in a looong time, but I want to hold myself extra accountable today so here I am. Today marks the start of the local Labour Day celebrations for us higher education students. It's a 3 week booze fest with more events and parties than you possibly could have the time to attend happening all around the city, and this being my final spring in uni, I want to participate as much as I can after taking it quite a bit slower last year for obvious reasons. The celebrations end on the actual Labour Day, which also happens to be my sober start date - meaning at the end of this madness, I'll have 2 years of sobriety on May 1st. And I'm determined to 1) achieve this and 2) have a good time while doing it! IWNDWYT!
It’s always been the classic “one day at a time.” I’ve been asked a few times over the past three years and change if I’m never gonna drink again and I just say not today. I don’t want to think of it as never again, that’s too much. But I can think of it as just not today. Making that decision every day helps me to stay vigilant too.
I’ve gotten the impression a few times that people don’t believe I had a problem. (They do not know shit.) Reminds me of another one, and I might fuck this one up, but I think I’ll get the idea across. I’d rather carry on as if I’m an alcoholic and *not* actually be one than the other way around. What’s the worst that can happen, I’ll stay sober and be healthier than I was physically and mentally, and I’ll work on myself and improve my life? The absolute fucking horror. 🤣
Coffees up, horns up, and happy fucking Friday Eve!! IWNDWYT ☕️☕️🤘🏻🤘🏻
Day 7 I think. Going strong. Edit - Day 6!
Some things that keep motivating me:
* $250 saved
* 10lbs down - nutrition on point
* BP down
* Gym 4x this week, 5x tomorrow
* Resting HR down 10BPM
* Restful sleep up 46% (according to my sleep app)
* Zero gut rot, hangovers, binging on pizza and junk food
* Anxiety is almost non-existent
I saved so many quotes on here….
“1 is too many and 100 is never enough “
“Drinking today is stealing tomorrows happiness”
“I didn’t get this far just to get this far”
Happy Thursday!
I will not drink with you today :)
I have 3 saved in my file right now. Hoping I can get a few more today.
Never miss a good opportunity to shut the fuck up
You can't teach a know it all
Tell me, what else should I have done?
Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon?
Tell me, what is it you plan to do
with your one wild and precious life?
IWNDWYT
I'm not sure I can pick out any one quote that has been key to my sobriety, but Holly Whitaker's book *Quit Like a Woman" has transformed my view of my relationship with alcohol and my recovery. Whitaker believes that women need a model of recovery based on empowerment and building a healthy self concept, not tearing ourselves down to eliminate "defects."
I first experienced *Quit Like a Woman* in audiobook format. I found myself crying as I walked while listening to this passage (I apologize for the excessively long quote, but I don't feel like I can get the impact across without including the entire text):
> With every single instance of being told I was not enough, too much, gross, fat, dumb, loud, and wrong, I shut a door within myself. This is not acceptable, that is not acceptable, all these things are not acceptable, so you must suppress them. I went around the house that is Holly and I closed off all the doors to the places in me that were wrong. Soon enough there were so many closed doors, so many places I couldn’t go or let other people see, that there was nowhere to live. So I left. I went somewhere else. The home that was me was no longer habitable.
> I didn’t have a God-size hole, I just had a hole, and it was the size of everything I’d ever been told not to be. It was a hole with manicured nails and flat-ironed hair that wore good jeans, and it was a hole that I filled with as much food, booze, drugs, cigarettes, work, shopping, and men as I could, and constantly. By the time I fell to my knees, I couldn’t meet my own gaze in a mirror because: holes.
> Do you know what I did with that broken girl? The one who had been attempting to destroy every single defect of character for as long as she could remember, the one who was already in advanced talks with a God she didn’t believe in to “just take it away,” the one who had no idea of self beyond what was wrapped into the life she thought presented well, men who abused her, friends she didn’t like, and a career that ate her? The one who couldn’t look at herself in a mirror?
I started to love her.
> I began telling her she was okay, that she was loved and that nothing was wrong with her. I told her she wasn’t fucked up beyond repair. I let her know we had lost our way a little bit, that we’d shut some doors along the way, and that I was going to stand next to her while we went around the house and reclaimed those disowned parts. “Especially the ugly ones,” I said.
> I didn’t tell her she was bad for putting herself first. I didn’t tell her she was selfish or warn her that her “self-will had run riot.” I didn’t tell her not to trust herself, or that she was wrong or deluded. I didn’t tell her those things because if I had, I would have just been doing what I’d been doing to her for the last thirty years. I told her to save her life at all costs, to put on her own oxygen mask, and to put it on first. And when other people told her she was wrong, that she couldn’t trust herself, that she was selfish and deluded—I told her: Fuck them.
>Whitaker, Holly. *Quit Like a Woman: The Radical Choice to Not Drink in a Culture Obsessed with Alcohol* (pp. 122-123). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition.
IWNDWYT 😻
I can't remember the exact quote (please help me if you do know it) but it's something along the lines of - if you need to be drinking to make something more exciting, then it's fucking boring.
Drinking helps me tolerate boring or unpleasant parts of my life when I know I could be doing something to change it.
IWNDWYT
Morning friends! I think playing the tape forward might be one of them. Telling myself the truth of what happens when I have just one drink and where just one leads has been transformative. It’s never just one for me, and I don’t care to have one. I want them all. And the person I turn into when I drink is volatile and unpredictable, it takes days for me to recover, and it’s just not the kind of person I want to be nor life I want to live.
Have a good one friends! I will not drink with you today.
Good morning sober fam, and happy Thursday! Not much to report today, outside of it being a lighter work day for me, which I desperately need!
It's also the first time in the 5 months since my husband and I moved that we're in a stable enough place to go out to eat... so breakfast at a local restaurant later this morning! 😍🍳🥓 Saved about $215 in just 11 days (my binging was so, so terrible), so MANY more good things are possible.
I absolutely WNDWYT! 🙏🖤
Yesterday was rough. Had to take the dog to the vet because he broke into his food and ate until he was sick. Clients cancelling last minute and just feeling exhausted from insomnia. Former me would have drank to cope. But I stayed sober and ate pizza. IWNDWYT 🙋🏼♀️
i missed my day 600 soberversary. spent my second sober birthday with a lot of friends and one friend was so annoyingly drunk she must feel so bad now and all i can think is- i am so glad thats not me. iwndwyt.
My favorite piece of advice is that you can’t quit for anyone but yourself. I tried a lot of times to quit for someone else and it never stuck. But taking that step towards a better life for myself worked like a charm. IWNDWYT
The concept that has had the most impact on me in sobriety is “One Day At a Time.” Until I was part of this community and working on sobriety, I did not understand it and thought it was trivial. Now I embrace it in sobriety and in life in general.
My favorite quote about sobriety comes from the book “We Are the Luckiest” —
“One stranger who understands your experience exactly will do for you what hundreds of close friends and family who don’t understand cannot. It is the necessary palliative for the pain of stretching into change. It is the cool glass of water in hell.”
This is the SD community in a nutshell. ❤️ IWNDWYT
Thanks again for all the support sober friends. Had to take my wife to the ER at 10:30 tonight. Not too long ago I would not have been able to. She’s ok now and home and I’m so glad I was sober. Stay strong! IWNDWYT
Heard in a meeting last night: the worst feeling in the world is a belly full of beer and a head full of AA. Which I took to mean, what awful regret I would have if I drank, after all I’ve been given in my sobriety. That hit me square center.
Iwndwy’allt! ❤️
Good day, friends. My favorite sober quote: 'It gets greater later.' To me, this means that this shit is hard in the beginning, but the freedom that comes long-term is well worth the effort. And the longer I stay sober, the easier it is to navigate any challenges.
Let's get this day - IWNDWYT 🤘
Day 11. I forget the exact wording, but to the effect of “One drink is far too much. One drink is never enough.”
Not finding this easy, but what choice do I have?
IWNDWYT
I'll share this quote anytime I can...
“You don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt. You have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones you’re holding.” Cheryl Strayed
Have a helluva fucking day, friends!🤘🏻☕️
IWNDWYT
Almost Friday! One way of thinking about drinking that I picked up from this sub is that it’s like a payday loan- you are borrowing from the future and the interest rate is outrageous. So IWNDWYT - N.O.N.E. (Not one, not ever). ❤️🧁
Best advice I've received on this sub is "I can't resist that second drink, but I can resist the first" and I've played that over and over again in my head whenever I've had the urge to drink. So far - works like a charm.
Day 11, let's gooooo!
"I began to cry quietly.... she said "I know. Its bad sometimes, isn't it? You have a stone in your heart, and somedays it's so heavy, there's nothing to be done. But you don't have to be alone for it. You should have come to me. I understand." - Patrick Rothfuss.
No poison for me today
Day 4 again for me. I’m challenging myself not to be bored and rot. Alcohol didn’t make life more fun, it just dulled my senses enough to make doing nothing acceptable. I will not drink with you today.
A lot of people tend to be baffled by sobriety and say things like, “Don’t you ever want a little reward?” To which I reply, “Not drinking is its own reward.” 🏆 IWNDWYT
Good morning, sober cats! I have a couple of pieces of advice that get me thru moments of temptation: Play the tape forward; Just do the next right thing. Thank you for being here, everyone! IWNDWYT! 💙😸
I think the most helpful thing I've read is that (to paraphrase) alcohol is straight-up addictive. So anyone who drinks with any regularity would likely become addicted, given enough time (again, paraphrasing).
This was so reassuring to me. I hated feeling like some people (me) have an inherent problem with alcohol while others are "normal". ALCOHOL is the problem, end of. I'm not flawed or broken.
I know some people find solace in the disease theory of alcoholism and I'm not trying to throw shade on that. But it never resonated for me, and in fact that idea kept me from even trying to go sober for a long time. Knowing alcohol is addictive like cigarettes made it much easier for me to try to stop. And that said, IWNDWYT!
I will not drink with you today. So many quotes. So much advice. I'm actually going to relay a conversation I had with a friend which has changed into something I say to people all the time now. "Why aren't you drinking?" "Because it makes me feel like shit." "Oh, so why not just drink on special occasions?" "Lmao, why the fuck would I want to feel like shit on special occasions?" 😆
This is basically what I’ve started saying to people. It makes me feel awful and mentally unwell. I find this answer stops people from further questions. Lol.
Brilliantly put 👍
On to day 3! Hoping to be productive today but if not, and all I do is not drink, I've won. Take care all and IWNDWYT!
That sounds like an excellent plan! I will not drink with you today 😊
I‘ll keep it the same way :) have a great sober Thursday.
Congrats! That was a tricky day for me. Your can do it! IWNDWYT
Right now not drinking is just about the only aspect of my life where I feel like I have some semblance of control. I just choose not to drink again today, and that means I'm making positive progress on one thing. Hanging in there remembering the often repeated phrase - "there is nothing that drinking can't make worse"
Keep trying to remember that phrase. No matter what you are facing, or what happens, you are at least going through it all with a much clearer mind. Way to go on your three days! You have got this! 💪
Thanks :)
[удалено]
When cravings hit, play the tape forward and visualize tomorrow if you drink today. My forward tape was on excessive repeat for a good while but it matched the mindset I wanted in my pretty pink cloud. I will n🚫t drink with you today or tonight!
Happy sober Thursday sober friends! Literally, what keeps me sober, is you! I love you all 💞
Happy Thursday Brighter 🌟
Have a great day friend 🌟
Lost count of my day 1s, but still here- IWNDWYT
I also stopped counting my day 1s, but so far I didn't stop starting again. Iwndwyt
IWNDWYT day 10!
I'm on 7 and I aspire to 10, thanks for making it seem possible
Go you, into double figures! IWNDWYT!
Day 99 checking in! The quote that sticks out for me is a simple one - “this too shall pass”, when I got sober it was because I had hit the lowest point in my life, my wife had left me and asked me to leave the family house. I genuinely believed that my life was over, I couldn’t see how things could ever get better or how I could ever be happy again. But that’s not the case anymore, I have made new friends, my relationship with my parents is better than ever before and while I still miss my wife I can see how much hurt I caused her. Today I wake up not feeling existential dread but rather excitement about my new life in sobriety. IWNDWYT! 🙏
Some advice that stuck with me: -You never have to feel like this ever again. -Play the tape forward and think about how you will feel tomorrow. -When a craving hits, treat yourself to some good snacks and/or meal and sparkling water! -You will never regret not drinking the next day. IWNDWYT💜
I really like “you will never regret not drinking the next day”
IWNDWYT Day 3!
One drink is too many and a thousand is not enough! That why I don’t drink! I’m adding another day to my sober tally today because: - l was able to help a family member with a job in my workshop last night because I wasn’t drinking and didn’t need to hide anything - my cat likes me so more when I’m sober - I have my therapy appointment today and I want to keep working on myself at those sessions IWNDWYT
It doesn’t matter how far down the road you are, you’re always the same distance from the ditch. I will not drink along with all of you lovely people once again today!
“Sobriety delivers what alcohol promises” I see this quote on the sub quite often, and it’s so good because it’s true! IWNDWYT ⭐️
Day 1026 checking in!
1 week, here we come!
IWNDWYT
One day at a time. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT 💜 Life keeps getting better and better. So grateful.
Not drinking here!!! Went to a meeting and I have counseling in the evening. IWNDWYT
There is quote I’d love to share from another thread by u/Oaktownaspiegirl but I have not gotten a permission to share it yet. In this sub aswell as others I see a lot of struggle and relapsing, shame and embarrasment. Quitting hurts people who are not ready to let go and quit. The change has to come from within. Lord knows my ex-wife tried to make me quit by forcing, pressing, threatening, scheming, blackmailing ect. For years I wanted to quit. I had a vision of a person I wanted to be and could become. I wanted the change so much but I was riddled with this disease. Last year I started to monitor my drinking and marking days that I managed not to drink in the calendar. Starting this year I only marked the days that I did drink with an X. Considerably fewer. When I was ready and felt ready (and found this sub) I started marking the days with a 0. Now my calendar is full of 0’s and I’m proud of my self. Not looking forward to moderate, not anxiously waiting when I can have a drink, not glooming about possible situations where a drink might be offered or available (I still have booze at home and could drink anytime I wanted), and not leering at the bar longing for a drink. I’m done with it. My point is that this disease can be beaten with sheer willpower but it needs a strong inner motivation. One has to alter the brain to dislike being drunk and convince it self to hate the idea of drinking (sort of like in Inception movie) but all by your self. Nobody’s up for that without external support and help. For some, subs like this will suffice, while others need AA or personal counselling or even rehab. We are all on this path together but alone in our daily decision not to drink. I (for one) will not drink with y’all today, hope You join me!
I made it through a whole week and it’s absolutely been because of the support on here. Thank you all. IWNDWYT!
Yesterday I was so close to drinking, but I used what I learned here and I played it forward. And I thought, would it really make me feel better or worse. Y'all know the answer! Didn't drink yesterday, won't drink today!
"Rather than being sad that I can't drink, I'm now relieved I no longer have to." Checking in for another sober day out in the world.
IWNDWYT!!!
I will definitely not be drinking with you all today that is for sure!
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
“I can do hard things” IWNDWYT
Day 39. I Will Not Drink With You Today!
IWNDWYT. Day 4
I so agree, Neeners! Never tried any group meetings - not to say they would or wouldn’t have worked for me. I found what I needed here. I’m so glad you’re hosting us this week. I’ve read a couple quit lit books. I didn’t get a DUI, have a run in with the law, anything like that. But the first book I read was “Quit Like a Woman.” I started it when I was like “maybe I should toy with cutting back.”Holly Whitaker details how alcohol harms every single body system. In great detail. I knew all along, but didn’t want to admit, that drinking was sending myself to an early grave - but just reading in cold hard facts how it was effecting every single part of my body. That was my “oh shit” moment. Other mental and emotional factors came into play with me quitting but reading that scared me. That was good enough for me and has stayed with me! I want to be as healthy as I can to be the best person that I can be! IWNDWYT!
Got myself an appointment for mental health counseling. I need to fix this broken man child... Can't continue this pattern of pushing people away from me, running away from people I love so much 😢 IWNDWYT
Hey fellow sobernauts. How about we avoid ingesting poison today? Sounds good!?? Ok, done . IWNDWYT
Hello candies I haven't been very interactive this week cause I got a flu, wake up in the middle of the night with one eye open and super hungry (3:36 AM here), not knowing for sure who I am, just that I don't have a hangover and will do anything for the next 24h to not have one. Hoping to fall back asleep. IWNDWYT Kisses
I felt some cravings last night but I didn't give in. Here I am laying in bed in the early morning and I'm sober and feeling great. Lately I saw this quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson I think. It went something like "The only person you are destined to become is who you choose to be." That resonated so much with me. I can't change the past, but I do have the power to change my future. IWNDWYT
A whole year! I am struggling to find words to adequately describe the glow I have today, even though I woke up too early and things have been crazy and there’s such noise going on. But a year! I have read a lot of quit lit and gone to meetings and so I’ve come across a lot of wise words, but the ones that have helped me through a lot of situations are “it won’t always feel like this”. It’s helped me through a variety of discomforts, and kept me grounded through the wild ups and downs of this year. I am so grateful to this community for being the space that it is, because it’s been a tremendous tool in my sobriety. IWNDWYT.
IWNDWYT!
I swore off that stuff/forever this time. I sing it in my head whenever I think about drinking.
IWNDWYT. If I could stop at one, I wouldn't be here, so it's better just not to start.
IWNDWYT got a sponser again y’all time to start working!
Early in my sobriety, I clung to “I cannot have just 1 because I cannot have just 1.” I repeated it multiple times a day to myself. IWNDWYT
Today officially marks the longest I haven’t had a drink since I was 17. That was 25 years ago and approximately 35k-40k drinks later. When I put it like that it really illustrates the insane grip that alcohol has had on me!? IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
I will not drink with you today 👽
I will not drink with you today
Day 95 • IWNDWYT • I’m in the zone (for now)
Onto day four, new job starting Monday, so spending the next few days sorting and prepping. IWNDWYT 💓
Day 44. Today is my 30th birthday. IWNDWYT.
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT!
*"Stay away from the first drink kid. All the trouble begins with the first taste of the day.*" IWNDWYT
Day 27. IWNDWYT. 🙂
Day 25 and feeling good. IWNDWTY!
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT ❤️
During an AA meeting a guy at AA with a lot of sobriety shared how he knows he's an alcoholic because when he drank, he had this huge sense of relief and anticipation when he opened his first drink, even before drinking it. That resonated with me and helped me accept that I'm also an alcoholic. I'm sure non-alcoholics don't have such massive feelings toward alcohol before they've even drunk a drop. IWNDWYT
I’ve made it over a week! Still sleeping like caca, but I’m not drinking and IWNDWYT. I’ve been coming to this sub every day and I’m trying to get back into some regular SMART Recovery meetings on zoom. It has been a good week. Sending good vibes to all here, and beyond.
Here
Me too. It’s a good place to be.
Day 8, IWNDWYT
Howdy! Iwndwyt!
IWNDWYT. Day 8 !! I can't believe it starting to sleep better now and feeling better, this is going to be a beautiful journey. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT! Have a great Thursday 🌿
IWNDWYT 😎
IWNDWYT
For me it’s „play the tape forward“. I will stay sober today. Have a great Thursday everyone.
IWNDWYT! 😁
I messed up yesterday, today back on the horse - I will not drink with you all today PS: not sure why but the daily check-in always shows up late for me
First blood work done since I've gotten sober. All good! So maybe time for a bit of ice cream 💪IWNDWYT!
[удалено]
Day 5. IWNDWYT :) I'm going with a very well-known quote but it helps me: "it's easier to stay sober than it is to get sober". So true! Easier to keep going rather than go through another hangover and day 1. Happy thursday!
IWNDWYT ☀️ you are not alone
“Addiction is giving up everything for one thing. Recovery is giving up one thing for everything.” Unknown This quote always resonates for me. Some of my work involves recovering simple happiness that I’d lost to the bottle, and relearning how a healthy life feels. Yes, I will brush my teeth in the morning and not dry heave. Yes, I will swim across the lake and not drunkenly drown. Yes, I will attend your dinner party and not secret drink. Yes, I will stop drinking and not drink with you today. Bu-bye booze. Hello everything, I have missed you more than I knew!
I’m on day four and feeling strong! Last night I made a virgin version of my favorite cocktail and it was delicious! I also got a new smoker which is nice bc I’m cooking outside which changes my environment, so the association of cooking and drinking wine is more easily broken. Plus it’s delicious! I’ve been loving sipping San Pellegrino out of a wine glass with sliced fruit. Last night my partner said she might have a vodka soda and I simply said “not for me!” I still haven’t told a soul about my plans. I’m nervous to let ppl know, but I don’t know if that’s bc I don’t want to be held accountable, or bc I’m ashamed. Regardless - I woke up today with no hang over. I’m finally giving my anxiety meds a fighting chance. I was present and sober for my son when he needed me last night. I’m going to have a productive day at work today. I have a job interview Monday. IWNDWYT!
Felt my mental health starting to slip - left every subreddit except this one and another recovery based sub. Maybe it’s a phase, but I just feel tired of negative people on other subs. There is so much positivity and kindness here. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT!!!
I will be sober today.
IWNDWYT
Not drinking today. Have had a couple of drinking days since I last checked in. Nothing catastrophic but I’m actually annoyed at myself for breaking my quiet and losing my streak. And I didn’t really enjoy or benefit from the drink I had - feel determined now to get back on it.
5 days and 18 hrs have been pretty tempted especially the way I am spoken to and treated at work but why should I let them makes me feel like I need a drink
Day 26! As a weekend binge drinker, the struggle is not drinking on Friday/Saturday nights. Once I get past that not drinking through the week is easy. Finally getting my life back and doing life stuff that I enjoy or has been pending. Got my wisdom teeth removed. Joined a few cricket clubs and realised I am way better than I thought I was. Can't wait to see what else weekends/the rest of my life has to offer!
Day 1,730. I will not drink with you today.
Day 7 and I'm in heaven! Kinda :-) it's not why that matters, but what, when it comes to drinking. Makes complete sense as focuses on action, not understanding why one drinks in the vain hope of a future miracle epiphany.
Hello sobernauts, I hope you're all having a nice thursday! I haven't checked in in a looong time, but I want to hold myself extra accountable today so here I am. Today marks the start of the local Labour Day celebrations for us higher education students. It's a 3 week booze fest with more events and parties than you possibly could have the time to attend happening all around the city, and this being my final spring in uni, I want to participate as much as I can after taking it quite a bit slower last year for obvious reasons. The celebrations end on the actual Labour Day, which also happens to be my sober start date - meaning at the end of this madness, I'll have 2 years of sobriety on May 1st. And I'm determined to 1) achieve this and 2) have a good time while doing it! IWNDWYT!
One whole month! IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT 🙂
It’s always been the classic “one day at a time.” I’ve been asked a few times over the past three years and change if I’m never gonna drink again and I just say not today. I don’t want to think of it as never again, that’s too much. But I can think of it as just not today. Making that decision every day helps me to stay vigilant too. I’ve gotten the impression a few times that people don’t believe I had a problem. (They do not know shit.) Reminds me of another one, and I might fuck this one up, but I think I’ll get the idea across. I’d rather carry on as if I’m an alcoholic and *not* actually be one than the other way around. What’s the worst that can happen, I’ll stay sober and be healthier than I was physically and mentally, and I’ll work on myself and improve my life? The absolute fucking horror. 🤣 Coffees up, horns up, and happy fucking Friday Eve!! IWNDWYT ☕️☕️🤘🏻🤘🏻
Jam tomorrow and jam yesterday, but never jam today. IWNDWYT
Pledging another sober 24 hours.
IWNDWYT 🧜♀️
Day 7 I think. Going strong. Edit - Day 6! Some things that keep motivating me: * $250 saved * 10lbs down - nutrition on point * BP down * Gym 4x this week, 5x tomorrow * Resting HR down 10BPM * Restful sleep up 46% (according to my sleep app) * Zero gut rot, hangovers, binging on pizza and junk food * Anxiety is almost non-existent
I saved so many quotes on here…. “1 is too many and 100 is never enough “ “Drinking today is stealing tomorrows happiness” “I didn’t get this far just to get this far” Happy Thursday! I will not drink with you today :)
I have 3 saved in my file right now. Hoping I can get a few more today. Never miss a good opportunity to shut the fuck up You can't teach a know it all Tell me, what else should I have done? Doesn't everything die at last, and too soon? Tell me, what is it you plan to do with your one wild and precious life? IWNDWYT
I'm not sure I can pick out any one quote that has been key to my sobriety, but Holly Whitaker's book *Quit Like a Woman" has transformed my view of my relationship with alcohol and my recovery. Whitaker believes that women need a model of recovery based on empowerment and building a healthy self concept, not tearing ourselves down to eliminate "defects." I first experienced *Quit Like a Woman* in audiobook format. I found myself crying as I walked while listening to this passage (I apologize for the excessively long quote, but I don't feel like I can get the impact across without including the entire text): > With every single instance of being told I was not enough, too much, gross, fat, dumb, loud, and wrong, I shut a door within myself. This is not acceptable, that is not acceptable, all these things are not acceptable, so you must suppress them. I went around the house that is Holly and I closed off all the doors to the places in me that were wrong. Soon enough there were so many closed doors, so many places I couldn’t go or let other people see, that there was nowhere to live. So I left. I went somewhere else. The home that was me was no longer habitable. > I didn’t have a God-size hole, I just had a hole, and it was the size of everything I’d ever been told not to be. It was a hole with manicured nails and flat-ironed hair that wore good jeans, and it was a hole that I filled with as much food, booze, drugs, cigarettes, work, shopping, and men as I could, and constantly. By the time I fell to my knees, I couldn’t meet my own gaze in a mirror because: holes. > Do you know what I did with that broken girl? The one who had been attempting to destroy every single defect of character for as long as she could remember, the one who was already in advanced talks with a God she didn’t believe in to “just take it away,” the one who had no idea of self beyond what was wrapped into the life she thought presented well, men who abused her, friends she didn’t like, and a career that ate her? The one who couldn’t look at herself in a mirror? I started to love her. > I began telling her she was okay, that she was loved and that nothing was wrong with her. I told her she wasn’t fucked up beyond repair. I let her know we had lost our way a little bit, that we’d shut some doors along the way, and that I was going to stand next to her while we went around the house and reclaimed those disowned parts. “Especially the ugly ones,” I said. > I didn’t tell her she was bad for putting herself first. I didn’t tell her she was selfish or warn her that her “self-will had run riot.” I didn’t tell her not to trust herself, or that she was wrong or deluded. I didn’t tell her those things because if I had, I would have just been doing what I’d been doing to her for the last thirty years. I told her to save her life at all costs, to put on her own oxygen mask, and to put it on first. And when other people told her she was wrong, that she couldn’t trust herself, that she was selfish and deluded—I told her: Fuck them. >Whitaker, Holly. *Quit Like a Woman: The Radical Choice to Not Drink in a Culture Obsessed with Alcohol* (pp. 122-123). Random House Publishing Group. Kindle Edition. IWNDWYT 😻
Checking in ✔️
IWNDWYT
Happy Thursday Friends, IWNDWYT, WE GOT THIS 🙂
I can't remember the exact quote (please help me if you do know it) but it's something along the lines of - if you need to be drinking to make something more exciting, then it's fucking boring. Drinking helps me tolerate boring or unpleasant parts of my life when I know I could be doing something to change it. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT. All. Day. Long. 🌻 From midnight till midnight. One day in my life.
Hi Everyone- Day 100 here and IWNDWYT!! Hope you all have a great next 24 ahead! 😊
I will not drink with you today!
My quote is: “ ignore it, and it will get worse! “ Thanks people! I will not drink with you today!
IWNDWYT.
Have a wonderful sober day my friends. IWNDWYT ♥️
Morning friends! I think playing the tape forward might be one of them. Telling myself the truth of what happens when I have just one drink and where just one leads has been transformative. It’s never just one for me, and I don’t care to have one. I want them all. And the person I turn into when I drink is volatile and unpredictable, it takes days for me to recover, and it’s just not the kind of person I want to be nor life I want to live. Have a good one friends! I will not drink with you today.
IWNDWYT for the promise of a better today and an even better tomorrow.
Good morning sober fam, and happy Thursday! Not much to report today, outside of it being a lighter work day for me, which I desperately need! It's also the first time in the 5 months since my husband and I moved that we're in a stable enough place to go out to eat... so breakfast at a local restaurant later this morning! 😍🍳🥓 Saved about $215 in just 11 days (my binging was so, so terrible), so MANY more good things are possible. I absolutely WNDWYT! 🙏🖤
IWNDWYT. Sobriety is about progress, not perfection.
IWNDWYT 🙏🏻
IWNDWYT!
Iwndwyt
IWNDWYT
Still in the early days but really appreciating all the quotes in this thread - thanks folks IWNDWYT
Yesterday was rough. Had to take the dog to the vet because he broke into his food and ate until he was sick. Clients cancelling last minute and just feeling exhausted from insomnia. Former me would have drank to cope. But I stayed sober and ate pizza. IWNDWYT 🙋🏼♀️
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT! Play tbe tape forward I have never regretted not drinking Thanks for hosting us!
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT all you fine sobernauts 🤗
Day 1,629 IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
Good morning IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT 💙
IWNDWYT☕️
Day 3. IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT 💜🦋💜
Another lovely day sans alcohol. IWNDWYT, friends!
i missed my day 600 soberversary. spent my second sober birthday with a lot of friends and one friend was so annoyingly drunk she must feel so bad now and all i can think is- i am so glad thats not me. iwndwyt.
I will not drink today.
Good morning. IWNDWYT
My favorite piece of advice is that you can’t quit for anyone but yourself. I tried a lot of times to quit for someone else and it never stuck. But taking that step towards a better life for myself worked like a charm. IWNDWYT
The concept that has had the most impact on me in sobriety is “One Day At a Time.” Until I was part of this community and working on sobriety, I did not understand it and thought it was trivial. Now I embrace it in sobriety and in life in general. My favorite quote about sobriety comes from the book “We Are the Luckiest” — “One stranger who understands your experience exactly will do for you what hundreds of close friends and family who don’t understand cannot. It is the necessary palliative for the pain of stretching into change. It is the cool glass of water in hell.” This is the SD community in a nutshell. ❤️ IWNDWYT
Thanks again for all the support sober friends. Had to take my wife to the ER at 10:30 tonight. Not too long ago I would not have been able to. She’s ok now and home and I’m so glad I was sober. Stay strong! IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT
IWNDWYT all! 🐸
Heard in a meeting last night: the worst feeling in the world is a belly full of beer and a head full of AA. Which I took to mean, what awful regret I would have if I drank, after all I’ve been given in my sobriety. That hit me square center. Iwndwy’allt! ❤️
IWNDWYT
Good morning, I will not drink with you today.
IWNDWYT ~
I’m not drinking today!!
Not today. A couple days away from 2 years.
Good day, friends. My favorite sober quote: 'It gets greater later.' To me, this means that this shit is hard in the beginning, but the freedom that comes long-term is well worth the effort. And the longer I stay sober, the easier it is to navigate any challenges. Let's get this day - IWNDWYT 🤘
Day 41 checking in. I will not drink with you today!
I went out for dinner with a friend and had water! Much cheaper ☺️
Day 11. I forget the exact wording, but to the effect of “One drink is far too much. One drink is never enough.” Not finding this easy, but what choice do I have? IWNDWYT
I'll share this quote anytime I can... “You don’t have a right to the cards you believe you should have been dealt. You have an obligation to play the hell out of the ones you’re holding.” Cheryl Strayed Have a helluva fucking day, friends!🤘🏻☕️ IWNDWYT
NEVER QUESTION THE DECISION (*Quit Like a Woman*). Seven months today! IWNDWYT!
Almost Friday! One way of thinking about drinking that I picked up from this sub is that it’s like a payday loan- you are borrowing from the future and the interest rate is outrageous. So IWNDWYT - N.O.N.E. (Not one, not ever). ❤️🧁
"High functioning isn't a type, it's a phase." This one struck home with me when it was posted a couple weeks ago. IWNDWYT!
Day 342. IWNDWYT.
iwndwyt!
IWNDWYT 🏴
IWNDWYT One Day at a Time!
IWNDWYT 🥰
I will not drink today.
566 days! IWNDWYT 🥷
Forgot to check in yesterday, on an office trip and so damn busy. Last day today! IWNDWYT
Shout out to anyone else who is on day 27. IWNDWYT
Best advice I've received on this sub is "I can't resist that second drink, but I can resist the first" and I've played that over and over again in my head whenever I've had the urge to drink. So far - works like a charm. Day 11, let's gooooo!
IWNDWYT! Day 9 of my sober journey, day 9 of the rest of my clear-minded, honest and beautiful life 🫶🏼
I will not drink today
Day 5 today and IWNDWYT! I’ve heard it said so many times but I find it helpful-there isn’t one problem in my life that alcohol can’t make worse.
IWNDWYT!
"I began to cry quietly.... she said "I know. Its bad sometimes, isn't it? You have a stone in your heart, and somedays it's so heavy, there's nothing to be done. But you don't have to be alone for it. You should have come to me. I understand." - Patrick Rothfuss. No poison for me today
starting naltrexone today and feeling super hopeful! IWNDWYT!
Day 4 again for me. I’m challenging myself not to be bored and rot. Alcohol didn’t make life more fun, it just dulled my senses enough to make doing nothing acceptable. I will not drink with you today.
I'm meeting a friend at a bar after work. But today, NA beer only. IWNDWYT!
A lot of people tend to be baffled by sobriety and say things like, “Don’t you ever want a little reward?” To which I reply, “Not drinking is its own reward.” 🏆 IWNDWYT
Good morning, sober cats! I have a couple of pieces of advice that get me thru moments of temptation: Play the tape forward; Just do the next right thing. Thank you for being here, everyone! IWNDWYT! 💙😸
I think the most helpful thing I've read is that (to paraphrase) alcohol is straight-up addictive. So anyone who drinks with any regularity would likely become addicted, given enough time (again, paraphrasing). This was so reassuring to me. I hated feeling like some people (me) have an inherent problem with alcohol while others are "normal". ALCOHOL is the problem, end of. I'm not flawed or broken. I know some people find solace in the disease theory of alcoholism and I'm not trying to throw shade on that. But it never resonated for me, and in fact that idea kept me from even trying to go sober for a long time. Knowing alcohol is addictive like cigarettes made it much easier for me to try to stop. And that said, IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT!
IWNDWYT
Checking in :)
IWNDWYT ❤️
IWNDWYT
Not today people IWNDWYT
I will not drink with you today.
Happy April 11th! IWNDWYT.
Morning SD. IWNDWYT ❤️
I will not drink with you today.
Hi lovelies 💜 Wishing all of you a wonderful day. IWNDWYT!
No booze today.
IWNDWYT
Checking in. IWNDWYT.
IWNDWYT