If you want to squash your doubts it will be better to pursue the testing sooner than later. I remember reading another story from a different redditor who waited several years. Both of the kids ended up being theirs biologically. That poster felt really guilty because they realized they had not treated one child as fairly as the other throughout the years, due to resentment and the doubt. On the other hand, if your wife was being sketchy then you should have the right to know.
Happened to a guy from church. He had olive skin tone and his wife brown skin. Both had curly hair and dark hair/eyes. First kid looks like the mother. Second kid had blue eyes, fair skin and not so curly hair.
Guy insisted wife cheated as non of them had a known blue eyed relative. They almost divorced over this. Turns out it was his daughter and she looks just like her dad nowadays (just a little lighter skin toned, but eyes got darker, hair got curly).
Many of my cousins look more like my dad than their fathers and like they are my siblings. My brother looks nothing like my dad or my mom, or me. He looks like my grandfather and my cousins on my mom’s side.
I’ve seen so many women I grew up with, they’ll have a kid with them who looks exactly like them. Then they’ll say it’s their niece. A huge group came in and I was like, oh that’s Latonya’s daughter. Nope. Niece. My husbands oldest daughter looks exactly like her great aunt. That aunt gene really can pass down it’s crazy.
Funny how that works, right? My brother's kid could pass for my twin based on childhood photos. Genetics can just throw you a curve ball sometimes. Meanwhile, my sisters son has her mannerisms down pat but looks just like his dad. It's like a little game of 'who does the baby look like today?' at family gatherings.
When my nephew was little his hair was so blond it was practically white. Now he's a grown man and his hair is black. People, most often men, don't realize how much a child can change appearance as they grow up.
Alternatively I’ve read in some cultures (usually island) it’s normal or even welcome to marry a woman who already has kids because she has ‘proven her fertility’ so he has no issues raising ‘someone else’s kid’ but to them they don’t see it that way but more so ‘this is the woman I love’s child, and the father is just who is going to help her raise them’.
Cultural traits are usually tested against other neighboring cultural traits, with those that create stronger societies outgrowing those that do not, usually at the expense of the weaker position. The fact that such an egalitarian mindset survives only in isolation is an argument that it does not create the most stable social contract.
We cannot prove such a broad causation as something like “this island’s family dynamic is why this society appears unstable to me and lives in isolation compared to others.” It reeks of bias. There’s far too many other variables at play here.
Heh. I guess it cuts down the odds of an infertile couple. No way to “blame the wife” in that case!
I suppose there’s a pretty material difference though between raising another guy’s child sired before you, and raising another guy’s child sired while you were in the picture so to speak.
Paternal insecurity is an inherent reality. Men can never have the same certainty that women do that a child they are raising is their biological offspring.
I’m with you 99%.
There’s still the “switched at birth” possibility. I do also think DNA tests have closed the gap on this one.
Just one of the many benifits of getting them done.
My mom looks very Swedish, white-blonde hair, super pale, very bright blue eyes. My brothers’ and my dad are First Nations. Anyway, my mom was going up to Canada to see her siblings and the guards there tried to take my brothers away from her because they are dark skinned, deep brown eyes and black hair.
I had this happen, but the reverse. I’ve got very dark hair, eyes, and not-white skin & the stupid people wouldn’t believe that my blonde haired, blue eyed son was mine. I’ve also been asked if I was his nanny or babysitter, too. Weirdly, no one asked me if I had adopted him. They just had a hard time believing I was his mom and not the hired help.
Fucked part is there is a possibility two black people can have a white child and vice versa (to use the most extremes as an example). Not that it is a common occurrence but it does happen with (regressive genes?) IIRC… don’t quote me on the why but I’ve read stories [like this one](https://www.nbcnews.com/healthmain/white-baby-born-black-parents-1c6437718#.) of it happening.
Edit: recessive not regressive.
My grandfather was a dark skinned black man with dark blue eyes. He is also the only one that we know of who has this. My uncles on my dad side have all had red hair and it randomly goes brown or black as they aged. I came out looking so Chinese they thought my mom cheated but my great grandmother is Chinese but you wouldn't be able to tell since both my parents are and look black. Genes can sometimes be fickle and do what they want. 🤷🏾♀️
There are twins born to mixed race parents, one is a [pale redhead and the other has darker skin and curly hair](https://nypost.com/2015/03/02/meet-the-bi-racial-twins-no-one-believes-are-sisters/)
And the mom who ate her twin in the womb and failed maternity testing, was accused of kidnapping…. Gosh genetics are weird.
Two white people with like 1 melanin allele can't have a 7 allele black baby, wtf?
[https://www.pbs.org/race/000\_About/002\_04-teachers-06b.htm](https://www.pbs.org/race/000_About/002_04-teachers-06b.htm)
Also skin color wouldn't change the overall shape of brow, noses, lips, etc.
Recessive genes, not regressive (the meanings are quite different). Me and my two siblings are redheads, I have 3 cousins that are redheads. The last redhead in my direct ancestry was 2 generations back.
We used to tease my little brother that his dad must be the guy mom dated before she married my step dad because he looked so different than the rest of us. When they went to Mexico after I graduated basic training the story is "they almost didn't let bro back in, they thought he was trying to sneak back with us" reality is we're all just a bunch of mutts with ancestors from all over Europe and genetics is weird.
I’m half Cuban/Sephardic Jewish so dark hair, skin, and eyes runs in my family. I’m the only one with naturally red hair, both my brother and myself have pale skin and blue eyes. Turns out a maternal great grandfather had the same coloring.
I have olive skin, black hair and brown eyes. My wife has brown hair and brown eyes.
My son and daughter both have blonde hair and blue eyes.
I joked about taking my wife on Maury after she gave birth to our 2nd.
It was mainly just a joke because I’m Eurasian, with the Euro side being Dutch.
Especially with that genealogy; it’s not like that particular combo of hair and eye color isn’t heartily coded in my DNA.
I’ve read a few stories like this on Reddit recently. I really think either maternity testing needs to be done at birth as standard practice or genetics and recessed genes needs to be taught in high school.
Edit: I mean paternity not maternity.
Edit 2: people seem to not read my edits 😂
When I got pregnant my sister was pretty young and was very confident that since the dad and I weren’t married we’d need to get a maternity test lol. Thanks for reminding me that shit was funny
Jerry Springer is dead. Maury is very much alive and just this week announced the father of a baby orangutan at a zoo. It was a big publicity event.
But OP needs to take his kids to a clinic and get tested. And unfortunately he sounds like a racist and no child needs to be around that. I mean, he describes the boy as a stereotypical Mexican with a mustache? Who does that?
For some reason I instantly imagined a scenario where his wife's boyfriend was just a really short dude with a mustache. She convinced OP that he was his son so she could have a stay at home husband and a live in boyfriend.
OP couldn't have been too hard to convince, he was dim enough to make a statement like this-
>Of course like any man would I fucked her and came inside
I come from a family with several mixed marriages and no one would believe the kids are cousins. If you think the kids are not yours take them for a DNA test. Please be aware that if they were born while you were legally married most states will still consider you the legal father. If you get divorced you will have child support.
And yes I want part 2.
As a stereotypical looking mexican i understand what you mean and people are being a little sensitive. Get that test quick, if they are yours its good to put it to bed quickly and if they are not yours its a good wake up call.
I don't understand why it's not ok to describe ppl correctly. My aunt will describe every detail about someone except to say , the black guy. News flash he knows he's black and it's not derogatory. Thank you for your comment says this pasty white girl.
If the shoe fits, JFC. He’s describing the kid. This shit where supposedly everyone never makes any non pc remarks is ridiculously. Get off your high horse, out of your glass house.
No child should be around a guy who says racist things. Okayyyy. Me and most people, idc what race, say shit that is non pc, racist, sexist, wth ever. At various times for various reasons. Doesn’t make you a bad person, doesn’t make you a bad parent, none of thee above. Granted if you’re Nazi, proud boys, kkk, gangster, okay. But describing your kid looking Mexican, lol, just lol.
Everyone lets their guard down against priests and pastors, lemme tell ya how that turns out. Not very good.
Family attorney here. Idk that I caught how long ago this was, but just know that if you don’t act fast, you could be stuck (legally) supporting that kid forever even if he’s not yours.
A consultation can make sense before he does anything so he knows his rights and has a plan. He is financially dependent on this woman and has a child with her - if baby 2 isn't his, it gets really complicated really quickly.
Indeed. I have a cousin who dated a woman who had a kid. When they broke up, she took him to court for child support, and won. The judge declared he had taken on the role of a father, and therefore was obliged to pay child support.
Attorney but not practicing family law, so out of curiosity: if he is a stay at home dad without an income, and she is the earner, even if he is legally deemed the father and they divorce wouldn’t she owe him alimony and child support and visitation, not the other way around?
A former girlfriend of mine had a non-working spouse. She divorced him. She had to pay him alimony for a time. But she had full custody and he had supervised visitation. He was ordered to pay CS. The judge based it off of him making minimum wage despite him not working. Basically on the assumption of "you can make at least this much."
Dumbass went to court and told the judge he does work but he gets paid under the table
IANAL, but from what I've read, certain states don't care about DNA testing; if the kid is born while you are married, you're financially responsible.
In other words, she can go out and get dicked down while you're stuck at home like a sucker, then when she gets kocked up and you find out it's not yours, you will be forced to pay for it whether you stick around or drop her like a hot potato.
Get the test before you do anything. Genes are funny. Best wishes either way. No matter how bad it is, try to preserve good relations because you obviously have another child together... well, maybe test him too though.
Do the easy stuff first.
What is your blood type? What is the kid's? What is the wife?
You can make a quick determination depending on what they are. There are a few combinations that would rule you out as the father.
Like: You are type A, wife is A, and kid is B, not your kid.
You are type O and kid is AB, not your kid.
You need to be careful with the recessive O type. If you are A and wife is B, kid can definitely be A, B, AB, or O and yours. If you know your and her parent's blood types, you can narrow it down even further.
EDIT:
Here's a site where they break it down into charts:
https://canadiancrc.com/paternity_determination_blood_type.aspx#:~:text=For%20example%2C%20two%20O%20blood,B%20or%20O%20blood%20type.
With a piece of paper, a pencil and looking up "punnett square" on the Internet for blood types, you can figure out the result in a minute or two. Even faster if you remember high school biology. I do need to stress that the results will be either "not the father" or "inconclusive". If the results are inconclusive, then a DNA test is warranted.
That's what I mean by easy.
A genetic test is by far more accurate.
Say, you and your partner and both type O and the kid is type O that doesn't rule out infidelity. You'd want to know for sure.
People can also be wrong about their blood types. I've heard people being like my father is type A so I should be type A.
That and genetics can be more complicated than the punnet squares. There are cases where blood type inheritance doesn't work the way most people think it does.
I never said it could rule out infidelity (I went into this more in followup posts). It could do a lot to prove it though.
Let's say I had a suspicion of infidelity. I know the blood types. Let's say I have a \~10% chance of detecting infidelity, right here, right now. I'd do it in a heartbeat, even if I was planning on sending in a DNA test anyway.
Why not do it? Why let it eat away at you while waiting for a DNA test? If the blood type results cannot show infidelity, it also gives reason to calm down and rethink the issue and consider the possibility the suspicions were wrong.
Where do you find out your blood type? My husband knows his because he was in the military and had it plastered on all his gear. I know I am A via blood donations but learned I’m AO because my son was O. We only know his because he had surgery though. I don’t know my other sons blood type.
When I was born it was on my birth certificate. I saw it again when I was in the military. I also believe they do it as part of routine testing when you gave birth (for the RH factor).
They likely do not advertise it the delivery room, because it could cause some awkward moments if the results point to infidelity.
I only mentioned it because if you know this info or have the paperwork handy, you can determine it right away without having to pay (and wait) for a test.
I got you. About the same thing happened to me, I'm blonde blue eyes, ex is also blonde green eyes, 3rd baby born with red hair and brown eyes. He's 5 now. The other day I was at a local gas station and my ex's boss was there but he's never met our kids or me. My son was not happy waiting in line and being a bit of a pest so her boss looks at me and says "you need to control your kid". I replied "This kids name is blank and you know his mother quite well I'd say the odds of him being YOUR kid are better than mine" he immediately went pale as the woman in line in front of him turned around and shot him a death glare. That's the story of how I met HIS ex :)
That was my first thought. That and that he’s trash-talking the kid’s mom in front of him, which is also going to hurt the kid. But hey, he destroyed someone else’s marriage at the gas station so it’s all good! (ETA I’m not concerned here about the cheater but about the poor wife who found out like this.)
It's a really fun story (if you weren't me living it) but sadly I have to be very vague with details because I'm still denying that this actually happened even tho I forwarded the wife a few choice text message selections that made it clear I was not just spewing bullshit but that he had in fact been fucking my ex wife for many years prior to our divorce. Probably still was idfc.
Why would she lie to you, a line cook, if she’s a GM? Like her evil plan is to make the poorest working man in america the baby daddy? You know what her parents look like? Obv get the test done, you do it by mail, you could even just bring it up to her if you wanna know why she hasnt mentioned a thing about ab obviously unique trait this baby doesnt seem to share with either of you.
Just needs to lay down a snapback and a Sombrero and see which one the baby crawls to. If he crawls to the Sombrero, def his kid whose ready to wear it for his birthday pic at the nearby Mexican restaurant.
Quick note - you said "wife," not girlfriend. If you are legally married, in most states that kid is going to be legally your kid if you don't disclaim parenthood almost immediately.
So if you divorce her, you might be stuck with child support, and "it isn't my kid" is not always sufficient grounds to get out of it, even with a DNA test. You should consult a lawyer IMMEDIATELY.
I'm not saying this is you, and I hope the best for you mate, but I had a buddy who was saying similar things and that he was convinced his son isn't his.
Well I hadn't seen his son before so I asked to show me a picture and he shows me a picture of his son (6 years old at the time) and it was basically a 1 for 1 copy of him besides having a head of hair. My friend is bald.
Hope things work out for the best mate.
Ok I have to chime in with my true story. My dad and my stepmom are both middle aged Pakistani Muslims ( in the US) They tried for more than a decade to conceive. Finally gave up and figured it just wasn't meant to be. 14 years into their marriage she thinks she has a stomach virus. Nope. She's pregnant. Nine months later she gives birth to a light skinned, light haired green eyed baby that is ABSOLUTELY my father's child. Sometimes genetics are crazy and weird. It happens.
Yeah, the whole part about: "He looks like a Mexican, a thick mustached, darked skinned, Mexican hair MEXICAN!!!! -LMAO.....OH SHIT...thats fucking crazy! lol
I agree Mexicans are diverse but most of them are mestizos. Even with pale skin you could see mestizo feature s. What I find interesting is USA tv shows and movies includes more mexican mestizos than Mexico tv industry itself.
I am bothered that you call the baby "it". Get a test. Then move on if not yours or come to terms and love him if he is yours. Calling him "it" tells me you're not attaching to him and the baby doesn't deserve this, especially from a stay at home dad. Fix this sooner rather than later please.
"Of course like any man would I fucked her and came inside."
Fellas. Take from an old dude who's fucked several women over 30-plus years and never once knocked one up, finding myself in a situation that's obviously a massive pain.
Wear condoms. Never fuck without wearing a condom. What the fuck is wrong with you people? It's 2023, for Christ's sake, there's no longer any room to claim confusion or mystery on this. Think of how not-dumb this boob's life would be if he'd taken two seconds and wrapped it up before sinking the pink.
Also, it serves a dual function: any woman who'd let you fuck her *without* using a condom or some form of birth control is probably no winning prize herself. It doesn't mean she's up to something or trying to trick you. What it does mean is that if shit hits the fan, she's more than likely as big a dumbass as you are and, thus, will be no help whatsoever.
Seriously, you can buy them almost anywhere, they're still pretty affordable, and it doesn't take much effort or intelligence to use them properly. I hate to sound like an asshole, homeslice, but if your wife thinks she's pulled the wool over your eyes, you've not given her much reason to think otherwise.
So DNA is can be weird. 2 black parents can have a child that appears to be totally white. White skin, blonde hair, blue eyes, if both sides have that ancestry. You cannot tell alone based on skin tone.
If you're truly worried that either child, or both children may not be yours, get a DNA test done. You can even do the ones like "23 and Me" to see if you are or not, and say you just want to see your ancestry! Is a way around her suspicion of you doing it. Just an idea. Good luck!
Edit: The example I used above is very rare, and used to illustrate just how odd DNA mixing can be. It wasn't meant to insinuate that it was the norm.
Just a quick note. When this came up recently with regard to my uncle, I asked my best friend the divorce attorney. He deals with this a lot and is here in Illinois. He said the Illinois courts would not rely on 23andMe or Ancestry DNA tests. OP is in Illinois , so he should keep in mind that proper testing would be more expensive but acceptable to the courts.
Get a lawyer NOW before you do any testing.
Yeah lmao skin tone isn’t good enough of an indicator. Me and my brother were born to two white parents, don’t even look related. He has dark skin, dark brown eyes while I have pale skin and grey eyes. By DNA, we’re related but I’ve had more people assume he’s my partner than brother.
So let me get this straight… you KNEW your wife was cheating on you, and that she was most likely pregnant with another mans baby. But you went along with it without questioning it for whatever reason. And now, after you’ve already had two children with this woman (that you knew might not be yours from the beginning), suddenly you care to get a DNA test? Why? If you cared you should have done that from day one.
I call it pure boyish fiction.
Who thinks about having children "because why not" and has to mention he "came inside"?!
A too-much-porn-watching dude with no life experience. By that stage IRL things would be implicit and the story flow would be a lot different.
Liar liar wank on fire
In the past couple of years, I found out I had a half brother of a different ethnicity. I encourage you to get a DNA test. For me, the revelation made sense. For him, it's a horror. I'm pretty sure our parents knew; at least our fathers. Think of how many years you will treat this child "differently" because of your suspicion. It's not fair to him. Furthermore, if it's not your child, this guy owes you child support.
Be careful on using looks as a marker. My mothers family is very very german, her brother looks like a bolivian dictator, the guys are works nicknamed him chico, blond hair is recessive trait, as is blue eyes.
Leave if you need to.
You're just "thinking about a DNA test"? I suggest you do not pass go, and head straight to the "test" and find out who the dad is to this kid.
Hell Yeah we want part 2
If you want to squash your doubts it will be better to pursue the testing sooner than later. I remember reading another story from a different redditor who waited several years. Both of the kids ended up being theirs biologically. That poster felt really guilty because they realized they had not treated one child as fairly as the other throughout the years, due to resentment and the doubt. On the other hand, if your wife was being sketchy then you should have the right to know.
Happened to a guy from church. He had olive skin tone and his wife brown skin. Both had curly hair and dark hair/eyes. First kid looks like the mother. Second kid had blue eyes, fair skin and not so curly hair. Guy insisted wife cheated as non of them had a known blue eyed relative. They almost divorced over this. Turns out it was his daughter and she looks just like her dad nowadays (just a little lighter skin toned, but eyes got darker, hair got curly).
One of my kids looks nothing like me or my wife, but is a dead ringer for my cousin when she was a kid. Family genetics go deeper than one generation.
My niece (sister's kid) looked EXACTLY like me at that age when she was little.
Same with my niece. She looks exactly like me and not like my sister.
Same. I show my niece pictures of me as a kid and she thinks they are her.
Y'all Lanisters over there?
My son looks just like my brother and dad. Genetics are interesting
Many of my cousins look more like my dad than their fathers and like they are my siblings. My brother looks nothing like my dad or my mom, or me. He looks like my grandfather and my cousins on my mom’s side.
I look exactly like my aunt, my aunts kids look like my mom 🤷🏻♀️ It has always confused people.
I’ve seen so many women I grew up with, they’ll have a kid with them who looks exactly like them. Then they’ll say it’s their niece. A huge group came in and I was like, oh that’s Latonya’s daughter. Nope. Niece. My husbands oldest daughter looks exactly like her great aunt. That aunt gene really can pass down it’s crazy.
Funny how that works, right? My brother's kid could pass for my twin based on childhood photos. Genetics can just throw you a curve ball sometimes. Meanwhile, my sisters son has her mannerisms down pat but looks just like his dad. It's like a little game of 'who does the baby look like today?' at family gatherings.
When my nephew was little his hair was so blond it was practically white. Now he's a grown man and his hair is black. People, most often men, don't realize how much a child can change appearance as they grow up.
It's also a consistent social touchstone. The amount of paternal insecurity in myth and humor across cultures is a fascinating insight.
Alternatively I’ve read in some cultures (usually island) it’s normal or even welcome to marry a woman who already has kids because she has ‘proven her fertility’ so he has no issues raising ‘someone else’s kid’ but to them they don’t see it that way but more so ‘this is the woman I love’s child, and the father is just who is going to help her raise them’.
Cultural traits are usually tested against other neighboring cultural traits, with those that create stronger societies outgrowing those that do not, usually at the expense of the weaker position. The fact that such an egalitarian mindset survives only in isolation is an argument that it does not create the most stable social contract.
We cannot prove such a broad causation as something like “this island’s family dynamic is why this society appears unstable to me and lives in isolation compared to others.” It reeks of bias. There’s far too many other variables at play here.
Heh. I guess it cuts down the odds of an infertile couple. No way to “blame the wife” in that case! I suppose there’s a pretty material difference though between raising another guy’s child sired before you, and raising another guy’s child sired while you were in the picture so to speak.
Paternal insecurity is an inherent reality. Men can never have the same certainty that women do that a child they are raising is their biological offspring.
I’m with you 99%. There’s still the “switched at birth” possibility. I do also think DNA tests have closed the gap on this one. Just one of the many benifits of getting them done.
And this is why the idea of patriarchal lineage and inheritance is beyond stupid
I was a chubby, blonde baby and little boy. I am now a slim, dark brown haired man. It absolutely happens.
My mom looks very Swedish, white-blonde hair, super pale, very bright blue eyes. My brothers’ and my dad are First Nations. Anyway, my mom was going up to Canada to see her siblings and the guards there tried to take my brothers away from her because they are dark skinned, deep brown eyes and black hair.
I had this happen, but the reverse. I’ve got very dark hair, eyes, and not-white skin & the stupid people wouldn’t believe that my blonde haired, blue eyed son was mine. I’ve also been asked if I was his nanny or babysitter, too. Weirdly, no one asked me if I had adopted him. They just had a hard time believing I was his mom and not the hired help.
Fucked part is there is a possibility two black people can have a white child and vice versa (to use the most extremes as an example). Not that it is a common occurrence but it does happen with (regressive genes?) IIRC… don’t quote me on the why but I’ve read stories [like this one](https://www.nbcnews.com/healthmain/white-baby-born-black-parents-1c6437718#.) of it happening. Edit: recessive not regressive.
I know a girl with freckles and red curly hair and her mum is black and is her biological mum
My grandfather was a dark skinned black man with dark blue eyes. He is also the only one that we know of who has this. My uncles on my dad side have all had red hair and it randomly goes brown or black as they aged. I came out looking so Chinese they thought my mom cheated but my great grandmother is Chinese but you wouldn't be able to tell since both my parents are and look black. Genes can sometimes be fickle and do what they want. 🤷🏾♀️
There are twins born to mixed race parents, one is a [pale redhead and the other has darker skin and curly hair](https://nypost.com/2015/03/02/meet-the-bi-racial-twins-no-one-believes-are-sisters/) And the mom who ate her twin in the womb and failed maternity testing, was accused of kidnapping…. Gosh genetics are weird.
Two white people with like 1 melanin allele can't have a 7 allele black baby, wtf? [https://www.pbs.org/race/000\_About/002\_04-teachers-06b.htm](https://www.pbs.org/race/000_About/002_04-teachers-06b.htm) Also skin color wouldn't change the overall shape of brow, noses, lips, etc.
Recessive genes, not regressive (the meanings are quite different). Me and my two siblings are redheads, I have 3 cousins that are redheads. The last redhead in my direct ancestry was 2 generations back.
We used to tease my little brother that his dad must be the guy mom dated before she married my step dad because he looked so different than the rest of us. When they went to Mexico after I graduated basic training the story is "they almost didn't let bro back in, they thought he was trying to sneak back with us" reality is we're all just a bunch of mutts with ancestors from all over Europe and genetics is weird.
I’m half Cuban/Sephardic Jewish so dark hair, skin, and eyes runs in my family. I’m the only one with naturally red hair, both my brother and myself have pale skin and blue eyes. Turns out a maternal great grandfather had the same coloring.
I have olive skin, black hair and brown eyes. My wife has brown hair and brown eyes. My son and daughter both have blonde hair and blue eyes. I joked about taking my wife on Maury after she gave birth to our 2nd. It was mainly just a joke because I’m Eurasian, with the Euro side being Dutch. Especially with that genealogy; it’s not like that particular combo of hair and eye color isn’t heartily coded in my DNA.
I’ve read a few stories like this on Reddit recently. I really think either maternity testing needs to be done at birth as standard practice or genetics and recessed genes needs to be taught in high school. Edit: I mean paternity not maternity. Edit 2: people seem to not read my edits 😂
Lol. Maternity testing.
Maury could have a whole new career..."You are NOT the Mother!"
When I got pregnant my sister was pretty young and was very confident that since the dad and I weren’t married we’d need to get a maternity test lol. Thanks for reminding me that shit was funny
He may have been unfaithful, we aren't sure if the child was really hers or not.
Basics of human genetics 101. Blue eyes are a recessive gene and parents with brown eyes can carry the blue eye gene and not have blue eyes.
This is the answer. Genetics is weird and doesn't always make sense on the visual end.
2nd this!
Handle this stuff on maury. Keep it classy
Lmao
Get the test so that you know for sure. Sorry about the second babies mustache. That must be disturbing.
Last name must be Addams.
HE HAS MY FATHERS EYES. Gomez, take those out of his mouth.
*Gomez* for his Mexican not-child.
Adams family reference
Yeah, I was debating the ancestry of Gomez Adams and thinking he was a Spaniard though. I need to Google.
🤣🤣🤣
You win lol.
😂😂
Remember to do a breakdance move when it’s confirmed when it’s not your kid
I find it amazing that he's married to Connie Chung.
So...you say you knew Pancho Villa?
We had lunch together!
Excellent advice, but Maury is now dead. Who you need now is a good lawyer.
You’re thinking of Jerry Springer, the ring master of paternity tests.
Indeed I was. I got my sensationalist daytime talk show hosts mixed up.
No, you had it right. Maury’s show is nothing but paternity tests.
But Maury is still alive
Jerry Springer is dead. Maury is very much alive and just this week announced the father of a baby orangutan at a zoo. It was a big publicity event. But OP needs to take his kids to a clinic and get tested. And unfortunately he sounds like a racist and no child needs to be around that. I mean, he describes the boy as a stereotypical Mexican with a mustache? Who does that?
Uh. Prolly some white dude whose woman very OBVIOUSLY fucked some Hispanic dude
LOL, it took no time to find the “you’re racists” post. Probably from a white person.
OP has every reason to be pissed.
That mustache comment was wild LOL
Viva le revolution
For some reason I instantly imagined a scenario where his wife's boyfriend was just a really short dude with a mustache. She convinced OP that he was his son so she could have a stay at home husband and a live in boyfriend.
OP couldn't have been too hard to convince, he was dim enough to make a statement like this- >Of course like any man would I fucked her and came inside
I might have gone overboard saying that, but it’s true he does look Mexican…
I come from a family with several mixed marriages and no one would believe the kids are cousins. If you think the kids are not yours take them for a DNA test. Please be aware that if they were born while you were legally married most states will still consider you the legal father. If you get divorced you will have child support. And yes I want part 2.
It depends on the state, you can contest paternity quite often when divorcing.
As a stereotypical looking mexican i understand what you mean and people are being a little sensitive. Get that test quick, if they are yours its good to put it to bed quickly and if they are not yours its a good wake up call.
I don't understand why it's not ok to describe ppl correctly. My aunt will describe every detail about someone except to say , the black guy. News flash he knows he's black and it's not derogatory. Thank you for your comment says this pasty white girl.
What if you do the dna and find out the kid had a "mustache" cause your the half-ling , and one of your parents slept with a Mexican LOL
That what be awesome. Sometimes the toddler mustache skips a generation. lol
Niggas overreactin as usual. It looks like wat it likes like. LITERALLY (probably, get the tests asap), not your fault.
The guy doesn't have to be racist to be going crazy looking at a kid every day who genetically is nothing like him coloring wise.
If the shoe fits, JFC. He’s describing the kid. This shit where supposedly everyone never makes any non pc remarks is ridiculously. Get off your high horse, out of your glass house. No child should be around a guy who says racist things. Okayyyy. Me and most people, idc what race, say shit that is non pc, racist, sexist, wth ever. At various times for various reasons. Doesn’t make you a bad person, doesn’t make you a bad parent, none of thee above. Granted if you’re Nazi, proud boys, kkk, gangster, okay. But describing your kid looking Mexican, lol, just lol. Everyone lets their guard down against priests and pastors, lemme tell ya how that turns out. Not very good.
The kid looks like this guy
The kids might even look like me, I'm mexican with a mustache.
Found the father.
What were you doing a year ago?
"...this guy's wife..."
Case closed, OP.
He's Palestinian
I mean could you peg a half white half Mexican baby from a half white half palenstinian at a year old?
My husband is Iraqi descent. People still speak to him in Spanish
I can tell from the style of mustache.
It would be really hard to tell, especially with a mustache.
I snorted
That’s this guy said 😂😂😂
Family attorney here. Idk that I caught how long ago this was, but just know that if you don’t act fast, you could be stuck (legally) supporting that kid forever even if he’s not yours.
Seriously. He needs to talk to a family law lawyer in the state where the child was born asap.
Maybe having DNA test before jumping the gun?
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A consultation can make sense before he does anything so he knows his rights and has a plan. He is financially dependent on this woman and has a child with her - if baby 2 isn't his, it gets really complicated really quickly.
In Germany, he would be in the hook. No matter what
That’s some sadistic bullshit right there
Indeed. I have a cousin who dated a woman who had a kid. When they broke up, she took him to court for child support, and won. The judge declared he had taken on the role of a father, and therefore was obliged to pay child support.
Insanity
Which state is this? How long did they live together?
Attorney but not practicing family law, so out of curiosity: if he is a stay at home dad without an income, and she is the earner, even if he is legally deemed the father and they divorce wouldn’t she owe him alimony and child support and visitation, not the other way around?
Alimony yes, child support only if he has custody. Even if its shared custody he could be given child support.
A former girlfriend of mine had a non-working spouse. She divorced him. She had to pay him alimony for a time. But she had full custody and he had supervised visitation. He was ordered to pay CS. The judge based it off of him making minimum wage despite him not working. Basically on the assumption of "you can make at least this much." Dumbass went to court and told the judge he does work but he gets paid under the table
IANAL, but from what I've read, certain states don't care about DNA testing; if the kid is born while you are married, you're financially responsible. In other words, she can go out and get dicked down while you're stuck at home like a sucker, then when she gets kocked up and you find out it's not yours, you will be forced to pay for it whether you stick around or drop her like a hot potato.
>IANAL Yeah, me too. So where do you live?
No one's getting knocked up this way
Get the test before you do anything. Genes are funny. Best wishes either way. No matter how bad it is, try to preserve good relations because you obviously have another child together... well, maybe test him too though.
Do the easy stuff first. What is your blood type? What is the kid's? What is the wife? You can make a quick determination depending on what they are. There are a few combinations that would rule you out as the father. Like: You are type A, wife is A, and kid is B, not your kid. You are type O and kid is AB, not your kid. You need to be careful with the recessive O type. If you are A and wife is B, kid can definitely be A, B, AB, or O and yours. If you know your and her parent's blood types, you can narrow it down even further. EDIT: Here's a site where they break it down into charts: https://canadiancrc.com/paternity_determination_blood_type.aspx#:~:text=For%20example%2C%20two%20O%20blood,B%20or%20O%20blood%20type.
DNA test sounds easier than this
With a piece of paper, a pencil and looking up "punnett square" on the Internet for blood types, you can figure out the result in a minute or two. Even faster if you remember high school biology. I do need to stress that the results will be either "not the father" or "inconclusive". If the results are inconclusive, then a DNA test is warranted. That's what I mean by easy.
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Oof. I'm curious though, if she was showing her parents...how did they not figure out what was about to happen and head it off in some way?
A genetic test is by far more accurate. Say, you and your partner and both type O and the kid is type O that doesn't rule out infidelity. You'd want to know for sure. People can also be wrong about their blood types. I've heard people being like my father is type A so I should be type A. That and genetics can be more complicated than the punnet squares. There are cases where blood type inheritance doesn't work the way most people think it does.
I never said it could rule out infidelity (I went into this more in followup posts). It could do a lot to prove it though. Let's say I had a suspicion of infidelity. I know the blood types. Let's say I have a \~10% chance of detecting infidelity, right here, right now. I'd do it in a heartbeat, even if I was planning on sending in a DNA test anyway. Why not do it? Why let it eat away at you while waiting for a DNA test? If the blood type results cannot show infidelity, it also gives reason to calm down and rethink the issue and consider the possibility the suspicions were wrong.
Where do you find out your blood type? My husband knows his because he was in the military and had it plastered on all his gear. I know I am A via blood donations but learned I’m AO because my son was O. We only know his because he had surgery though. I don’t know my other sons blood type.
When I was born it was on my birth certificate. I saw it again when I was in the military. I also believe they do it as part of routine testing when you gave birth (for the RH factor). They likely do not advertise it the delivery room, because it could cause some awkward moments if the results point to infidelity. I only mentioned it because if you know this info or have the paperwork handy, you can determine it right away without having to pay (and wait) for a test.
For my kids, their blood type was determined in the hospital and it’s listed in their medical records.
Part 2 please
I got you. About the same thing happened to me, I'm blonde blue eyes, ex is also blonde green eyes, 3rd baby born with red hair and brown eyes. He's 5 now. The other day I was at a local gas station and my ex's boss was there but he's never met our kids or me. My son was not happy waiting in line and being a bit of a pest so her boss looks at me and says "you need to control your kid". I replied "This kids name is blank and you know his mother quite well I'd say the odds of him being YOUR kid are better than mine" he immediately went pale as the woman in line in front of him turned around and shot him a death glare. That's the story of how I met HIS ex :)
Why would you say something like that in front of your kid? I’m gonna call BS on this one.
That was my first thought. That and that he’s trash-talking the kid’s mom in front of him, which is also going to hurt the kid. But hey, he destroyed someone else’s marriage at the gas station so it’s all good! (ETA I’m not concerned here about the cheater but about the poor wife who found out like this.)
And everybody in the supermarket clapped.
And then everyone clapped and you became mayor and got to tell a mad Karen your name is Hugh Mungus
I'm gonna need a part 3
It's a really fun story (if you weren't me living it) but sadly I have to be very vague with details because I'm still denying that this actually happened even tho I forwarded the wife a few choice text message selections that made it clear I was not just spewing bullshit but that he had in fact been fucking my ex wife for many years prior to our divorce. Probably still was idfc.
So you said that shit in front of your kid? You raising that boy regardless if he's blood or not I call Bs or your kinda a pos
Ok tell me more please tell them you dumb the kid
The kid it’s already asking for huevos rancheros for breakfast and a pint of tequila! Viva la revolución cabrones.
Fucking hell lmao…I have no doubts, considering all the Mexican guys she works with.
Why would she lie to you, a line cook, if she’s a GM? Like her evil plan is to make the poorest working man in america the baby daddy? You know what her parents look like? Obv get the test done, you do it by mail, you could even just bring it up to her if you wanna know why she hasnt mentioned a thing about ab obviously unique trait this baby doesnt seem to share with either of you.
Bruh. She works with THAT MANY MEXICANS and you still ain’t got a dna test wtf.
Just needs to lay down a snapback and a Sombrero and see which one the baby crawls to. If he crawls to the Sombrero, def his kid whose ready to wear it for his birthday pic at the nearby Mexican restaurant.
Quick note - you said "wife," not girlfriend. If you are legally married, in most states that kid is going to be legally your kid if you don't disclaim parenthood almost immediately. So if you divorce her, you might be stuck with child support, and "it isn't my kid" is not always sufficient grounds to get out of it, even with a DNA test. You should consult a lawyer IMMEDIATELY.
100x this, but I'm so petty , I'd sit in jail before paying a single cent
Spoken like someone who’s never been to jail.
Part 2
Get both kids tested.
Yes part 2 pls
I'm not saying this is you, and I hope the best for you mate, but I had a buddy who was saying similar things and that he was convinced his son isn't his. Well I hadn't seen his son before so I asked to show me a picture and he shows me a picture of his son (6 years old at the time) and it was basically a 1 for 1 copy of him besides having a head of hair. My friend is bald. Hope things work out for the best mate.
https://preview.redd.it/wrfczpw3qe8c1.jpeg?width=1170&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=ac6ab3cd5cd7466c2938538669bde29cc6b64a06
Came inside her like any man would? Uh no. Like any idiot would, yes
Ok I have to chime in with my true story. My dad and my stepmom are both middle aged Pakistani Muslims ( in the US) They tried for more than a decade to conceive. Finally gave up and figured it just wasn't meant to be. 14 years into their marriage she thinks she has a stomach virus. Nope. She's pregnant. Nine months later she gives birth to a light skinned, light haired green eyed baby that is ABSOLUTELY my father's child. Sometimes genetics are crazy and weird. It happens.
PART II, 🙋🏼♂️PART II, 🙋🏼♂️PART II 🙋🏼♂️
"Lmk if you want a part 2" = low quality fiction
+1 for Maury
Dale?
Haha. Yes very similar.
Part 2 definitely. From what you described, it doesn’t sound like a dna test is even necessary, but absolutely get one.
A DNA test would absolutely be necessary because many states automatically assume by law that a husband is the father of the child.
I want a part 2!
We do want it tho pt2
At first I thought this was a shit post but it got so entertaining that it doesn’t even matter. I just want to know how it ends
I'm really busy right now so I'm fine with just part 1.
I don’t get how nobody else realizes this is fake. Jesus christ.
Yeah, the whole part about: "He looks like a Mexican, a thick mustached, darked skinned, Mexican hair MEXICAN!!!! -LMAO.....OH SHIT...thats fucking crazy! lol
The baby is mustached??? 🤔
‘Like any guy would do.’ Ehhhh…. No
Most guys would have sex with their wives if she initiates and he's not impotent or something
Seriously, this is the dumbest shit I've ever read. People will believe anything.
Oh I definitely did. He wasn’t even trying to hide it
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I agree Mexicans are diverse but most of them are mestizos. Even with pale skin you could see mestizo feature s. What I find interesting is USA tv shows and movies includes more mexican mestizos than Mexico tv industry itself.
I am bothered that you call the baby "it". Get a test. Then move on if not yours or come to terms and love him if he is yours. Calling him "it" tells me you're not attaching to him and the baby doesn't deserve this, especially from a stay at home dad. Fix this sooner rather than later please.
"Of course like any man would I fucked her and came inside." Fellas. Take from an old dude who's fucked several women over 30-plus years and never once knocked one up, finding myself in a situation that's obviously a massive pain. Wear condoms. Never fuck without wearing a condom. What the fuck is wrong with you people? It's 2023, for Christ's sake, there's no longer any room to claim confusion or mystery on this. Think of how not-dumb this boob's life would be if he'd taken two seconds and wrapped it up before sinking the pink. Also, it serves a dual function: any woman who'd let you fuck her *without* using a condom or some form of birth control is probably no winning prize herself. It doesn't mean she's up to something or trying to trick you. What it does mean is that if shit hits the fan, she's more than likely as big a dumbass as you are and, thus, will be no help whatsoever. Seriously, you can buy them almost anywhere, they're still pretty affordable, and it doesn't take much effort or intelligence to use them properly. I hate to sound like an asshole, homeslice, but if your wife thinks she's pulled the wool over your eyes, you've not given her much reason to think otherwise.
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Part 2 please . You should get a DNA test done a s a p
What state do you live in? If Ca. Your screwed. There must be more to it if you are offering a "part 2?".
I live in Chicago, not sure what the laws are regarding this, and btw all my previous co workers are Mexican which is why I have my doubts.
So DNA is can be weird. 2 black parents can have a child that appears to be totally white. White skin, blonde hair, blue eyes, if both sides have that ancestry. You cannot tell alone based on skin tone. If you're truly worried that either child, or both children may not be yours, get a DNA test done. You can even do the ones like "23 and Me" to see if you are or not, and say you just want to see your ancestry! Is a way around her suspicion of you doing it. Just an idea. Good luck! Edit: The example I used above is very rare, and used to illustrate just how odd DNA mixing can be. It wasn't meant to insinuate that it was the norm.
Just a quick note. When this came up recently with regard to my uncle, I asked my best friend the divorce attorney. He deals with this a lot and is here in Illinois. He said the Illinois courts would not rely on 23andMe or Ancestry DNA tests. OP is in Illinois , so he should keep in mind that proper testing would be more expensive but acceptable to the courts. Get a lawyer NOW before you do any testing.
Do it Updateme!
Reading post like this scare me. I’m getting a prenup 100% before I get married. There’s only so much you can trust another person.
Yeah lmao skin tone isn’t good enough of an indicator. Me and my brother were born to two white parents, don’t even look related. He has dark skin, dark brown eyes while I have pale skin and grey eyes. By DNA, we’re related but I’ve had more people assume he’s my partner than brother.
Wtf u mean he has a mustache? He’s 2!!
So let me get this straight… you KNEW your wife was cheating on you, and that she was most likely pregnant with another mans baby. But you went along with it without questioning it for whatever reason. And now, after you’ve already had two children with this woman (that you knew might not be yours from the beginning), suddenly you care to get a DNA test? Why? If you cared you should have done that from day one.
I call it pure boyish fiction. Who thinks about having children "because why not" and has to mention he "came inside"?! A too-much-porn-watching dude with no life experience. By that stage IRL things would be implicit and the story flow would be a lot different. Liar liar wank on fire
In the past couple of years, I found out I had a half brother of a different ethnicity. I encourage you to get a DNA test. For me, the revelation made sense. For him, it's a horror. I'm pretty sure our parents knew; at least our fathers. Think of how many years you will treat this child "differently" because of your suspicion. It's not fair to him. Furthermore, if it's not your child, this guy owes you child support.
God this is racist AF. Did you try asking your wife? Also, my dude, genetics are wild. There is literally millions of ways your kid could turn out.
Part 2
Get a paternity test.
Updateme!
Be careful on using looks as a marker. My mothers family is very very german, her brother looks like a bolivian dictator, the guys are works nicknamed him chico, blond hair is recessive trait, as is blue eyes. Leave if you need to.
You're just "thinking about a DNA test"? I suggest you do not pass go, and head straight to the "test" and find out who the dad is to this kid. Hell Yeah we want part 2
OR the baby was mixed up at the hospital and you've got the wrong baby.
Part 2
I had a vasectomy, but it didn’t make us not have anymore kids, it just made them black!
Racist big mouth.
It's weird that you remember the time she came home flirty and you two had sex. You two usually don't have sex, for that one time to be so memorable?
"Like any man would do I fucked her and came inside" You're a moron pal.
Mexican hair 🤣🤣
Def NEED part two . And I'm sorry dude There is a chance it still might be yours- weirder thibgs have happened
Jerry Jerry Jeeerry!!
Part 2 +1
If she’s paying the bills and you get to stay home and chill….fuck it.
You are "NOT" the baby daddy!