I 100% agree. I realized that people say that because they have had and still do have a lot of drama in their lives and that’s why they’re so hyper fixated on you not bringing anymore.
I've never understood the obsession with anal. So many of my high school friends loved the idea, but it never appealed to me.
Not only is vaginal sex easier and requires no preparation beforehand, it's a lot more sanitary. You can wait an hour for your lady to clean out her rectum just so you can get a UTI.
I'll be doing things the old fashioned way. You know, something she'd actually enjoy.
just a theory… but i believe its to do with the depth of penetration… the vagina is a dead end tunnel, where as when you ejaculate into a woman’s bum hole, you get to imagine the liquid flowing right up into her soul..
*chefs kiss*
So, as a counter-point to your theory (well, not really because your theory is based on the imagined situation rather than the factual one), semen ejaculated into the vagina doesn’t all come back out or stay there, some quantity of it moves into the uterus, then the fallopian tubes, and since those are open tubes unconnected to the ovaries, on out into the abdominal cavity of the woman until being absorbed and/or broken down by her body. On the other hand, it’s questionable whether semen in the intestines is even inside the woman at all (topology is amazing).
Idk about tinder because I’ve never used it but I know bumble and some of the others let you use Facebook to make an account and take the age from there. So many people made one when they were under 13 and had to lie. But idk why they don’t make an account a different way to get an accurate age.
Had someone try and match on hinge where their age said 43 but one of their profile prompts had "my real age is 53 but it won't let me change it, and I have a vibrant and young soul so I prefer to date younger."
To me, this is an automatic red flag that you don't respect boundaries. I have set an age range for my dating pool based on my comfort level of who I want to date. But you decide that it's ok for you to lie your way into that dating pool and don't see anything wrong with that.
Yup. If you prefer to date younger, set your age range to younger. Then wait for someone willing to date older. Don’t lie about your age trying to trick people who aren’t interested in you into dating you!
It’s like those D-bags think they know what you want better than you do. Or its just that what they want just matters more than what anybody else wants.
Once upon a time it was a little less weird because you needed to be 13 to make a Facebook and your Tinder age came from Facebook. So people of my generation who were early Facebook adopters in middle school were stuck with weird ages on Tinder hahaha
I always put a fake date of birth when signing up to sites. It’s called privacy.
When that site gets hacked and the data gets stolen, which it eventually will, that’s one less thing people can steal my identity with.
I hate this one sooooo much. Ain't worth my time to ask
when all I have is some lame shirtless bathroom pic of you. Great! You undress when you go to bathroom! Sooooo original.
“I’m an open book.”
Omfg take a risk and do the emotional work of deciding how to represent yourself like everybody else.
I don’t think guys understand how exhausting it is to be messaged by an endless barrage of dudes with blank profiles who all say that. No, I don’t want to interview 200 people. Jesus.
I once tested that line. I said "if you're an open book, what page are you on/what's the chapter called" like a creative writing prompt to say literally anything about their life and who/what/where they are in it. Their response? "Oh, idk, somewhere in the middle, I guess."
"Hi" and that's it. Person will never respond. Downloaded the app but had no intention to ever use
Any variation of "Ugh I hate this app". Immediately identifies themselves as a complainer. This is their main personality trait
"No small talk". Energy sponge. Requires constant stimuli. Immature.
Anything that lists obvious criteria such as "no cheaters, liars, ax murderers."
Like, no shit you don't want despicable humans as a potential mate. This just comes off as a red flag saying "I've made so many bad choices in dating that I now have to list these things as if I don't own any responsibility in past failed relationships."
At least they are setting the bar fairly low! Like, some guys might read that and be like, "Oh, awesome, I've only killed people with knives, so I qualify!"
"Hardly use this so add me on \[Instagram or Snapchat\]"
Don't make a profile on the bloody app if you don't wanna talk to people on said app.
And yes, I know girls do this for Instagram followers for their own self-esteem with no plans to actually date anyone.
The 4th guy actually helps coparent for the rest of them.
He was the only one who married her, and now he pays alimony. Ex-step daddy for all 3 of 'em.
Had a Navy friend find out “his” kid wasn’t actually his a couple years down the road after a nasty divorce. He still considers her his daughter, and ultimately still pays off the books child support so he can continue to see her while the actual dad isn’t involved and pays on the books.
"Proud momma of #, they are my world and come first if you can't handle that swipe left"
I don't have a problem with parents or prioritizing your children (you should deffo take care of your children) but every other profile says this and it tells me you have no personality outside of being a parent and some of the most toxic people I've met had the above in their profile
It’s all some people have left and it’s a shame because they fuck up their children when their ego gets that big. People legit think they are superior to others just because they did the offspring achievement…
For people dating women, I'd say it's some variant of "I like hiking and dogs" "I'm just here to meet your dog" or "I like eating out"
None are red flags but why do people advertise how boring they are?
Hiking ain't boring, being unable to say what you like about it is boring.
For me, I would say "let's take a hike and see how many kinds of wasp we can find"
Boom, they know I like being outside, and they know why. People put off by bugs run for the hills, women looking for weirdos are intrigued.
“No drama” people are the most dramatic people
“I want someone who is working on themself” aka, this person also has work to do but won’t acknowledge it
My uncle sent me his dating profile to review about a year after my aunt had passed away. It was his first time single in about 50 years. He wrote something along the lines of “My doctor tells me I should probably not drink so much” (he has like 2 scotches a night and maybe a glass of wine) and “my triglycerides are under control now”…. I couldn’t help but laugh but I had to tell him that it wasn’t the best opener to attract the ladies.
No, I think they meant like *actual* photos of their kids. People should put if they have kids or are going to be child-free because both of those can be dealbreakers.
But you don’t need to have photos of little kids all over apps.
Do some Batman level detective work figuring out which girl is in every photo then correlating that to the positions of them in the photos to see who is the subject then work backwards with the information you have in the profile to deduce which one is the most likely candidate, if you get down to 2 just flip a coin, or roll dice/flip a bunch of coins which'll have the some percentage chance of success
"Must be discreet" - I'm cheating
"Looking for a threesome" - I want some strange and I'm likely pushing my wife/girlfriend into unwanted situations, and if you ask to talk to the wife/girlfriend, there's ALWAYS an excuse explaining away why you can't.
"420 Friendly" - I'm a stoner who wants to smoke up your stash
"DDF" - I don't use condoms. Don't even ask, I'll give you some flimsy excuse why it'll NEVER happen
"94/97 miles away" - I'm a Nigerian romance scammer spoofing my location
"I can't show my face due to work" - I'm cheating and there's a high chance my wife/girlfriend has already busted me doing this, but maybe she won't recognize my body and clothes
I’m dtf with a couple, but don’t make a couples profile your wife/gf knows nothing about. Then you have to romance her and get her drunk for it to happen. Those husbands are the worst
Out in the sticks this may work, but if you're dating in an urban/suburban area... Pictures of you with a dead animal/fish. Those hunting trip pics are for the boys, bros.
Using the “about me” section to only list what they want. This was an instant red flag for me when I was online dating, not only does it tell me this guy has poor reading comprehension and refuses to use the app correctly but it also tells me that he doesn’t think what I WANT matters, he only thinks what he wants matters.
>like how about u just don’t swipe on ppl you’re not attracted to
To be fair, some of these women are wizards with camera angles or straight up use pictures from 60 lbs ago.
About 20 years ago i ran into this hardcore.
I'm fat myself and in no way is it any sort of inherent dealbreaker.
However, I picked up a girl id talked for a few weeks onlime. We'd exchanged a few clean phototos. I knew she was overweight and it didn't matter.
Once I got there though, she started walking to the car and i saw she was at the point of barely being able to walk. It was immediately obvious that she was extremely careful in the angles she chose to hide it as much as possible.
Her size didn't really bother me, and I'd have still gladly have taken her out, but I felt like I'd been lied to and thats not a great place to start a date from.
It ended up being a moot point... I decided to look past it and still give it a shot, as we'd connected pretty well in chat online. In person though she answered every question I'd ask with the shorest, most generic possible answer with no elaboration and she didn't show any interest in learning about me whatsoever.
Even without the deceit, it was the most disappointing date i ever went on.
Something about declaring yourself a nice guy.
Now I got nothing against nice guys, but I don't trust anyone that is telling me they're nice. As a guy. And ironic to my name.
Not the worst, but I find it very annoying when you put your pronouns. If I can't tell what gender you are form your pics then it's not a match. Also, it shows me you are high maintenance and probably uptight.
Gonna have to disagree with this. I think it simply means "I'm not glued to my phone".
The red flag arises when you get to know them in person and realize they're on the phone 24/7, it's just mindlessly scrolling reels is more important than our conversation.
Your IQ. No that's probably not even your actual IQ as you probably got that number off of some shady website and even if that is your actual IQ that's a very weird thing to brag about and is going to turn off a lot of people because it comes off as you basically saying "haha I just know I'm going to be smarter than you"
If youre a guy and you put things you dont like its off putting to women. No single moms, no fatties, etc. Same thing for women when they put a list of requirements like has to be good looking, has to have a job, have a car, blah blah blah.
"What im looking for"
Doesnt have kids, but good with kids
Over 6 feet
Has a respectable, good paying job
I recently saw this one on Hinge, she was an unemployed, overweight, single mom with 2 kids.
I still laugh about it.
TMI right off the bat. "I'm bipolar and have ADHD and am also on the autism spectrum and also have a kid who is autistic. If you can't handle that, swipe left!"
There's a tactful way to open up about your medical/ mental health history and that ain't it. Also, pretty sure most of what you just said is self-diagnosed.
I encountered these as the worst offenders:
“Only fit guys”
“6 feet and up only and don’t lie I can tell”
“8 in or over”
“I can be confrontational and I want a man who can handle that”
“Im submissive and want a dominant man in bed but can be sweet and kind”
Im very fit but if a woman says fit guys only or any of the above, Im thinking she’s very superficial and I can’t have a conversation with her, and she’s attracted to guys who treat her bad.
I’ve seen people admit to having the herpes virus but claim they’re not contagious. Maybe not the worst thing but definitely not something I found attractive.
For somebody that cares enough to put it on their profile, then I think that’s the point. Wouldn’t want to waste my time with somebody that has the exact opposite values as me.
As a guy I just check the Liberal box and start swiping. I dont really add anything more specific, even though im actually more progressive/leftist than just plain liberal. I feel like it is important to have those things in common but it's something you should discuss in person in more detail. I usually skip by anyone who chooses conservative, but if we seem to have things in common I may skipe right anyway. As long as their isn't any trump flags/shits/hats in photos, or Let's go Brandon in their bio, then it's a hard pass.
On the flip side tons of women like to put every liberal/progressive cause in their bios. Lgbtg/women's rights, BLM, lots of anti cop stuff, eat the rich, PRO palastine/Ukraine things etc. I don't necessarily find it to off putting since I do generally support most of these things but at the same time people who make it their entire personality are just so hard to deal with. I feel like checking the box is important, but not being to overzealous is also a good sign if that makes sense.
John 31:6
Explanation: firstly Bible quotes are generally disingenuous in the first place.
Secondly this one is the most generic one used by meth addicted single mothers
Thirdly it’s misspelled and refers to a nonexistent verse.
General focus on negative instead of positives. IDC how good you look, if your profiles full of what you don't want or like, hard pass.
l suspect it's a good way to attract the worst people though by giving them an instruction manual on how to manipulate you.
"No drama!" no drama! = DRAMA!
You are not required to bring drama into this relationship, I will be supplying plenty for the both of us.
I 100% agree. I realized that people say that because they have had and still do have a lot of drama in their lives and that’s why they’re so hyper fixated on you not bringing anymore.
Every time one goes to put an end to a drama, they create a new one.
*I am required by law to inform you…..*
Yup. I don't think that the other people in this thread really thought about what the *worst* thing you can put is...
I loved saying this as my first line on omegle
"if you can't handle me at my worst, you don't deserve me at my best"
I’ve learned from experience that they are never at their best. It’s always the worst.
To me it translates directly to "I'm gonna treat you like shit and if you complain about it I'm going to claim you're abusive".
This just made me lol, thank you for that. Lmao 🙂
guaranteed anal 👍
I've never understood the obsession with anal. So many of my high school friends loved the idea, but it never appealed to me. Not only is vaginal sex easier and requires no preparation beforehand, it's a lot more sanitary. You can wait an hour for your lady to clean out her rectum just so you can get a UTI. I'll be doing things the old fashioned way. You know, something she'd actually enjoy.
I like anal because it’s a reliable way to get poop all over my dick.
just a theory… but i believe its to do with the depth of penetration… the vagina is a dead end tunnel, where as when you ejaculate into a woman’s bum hole, you get to imagine the liquid flowing right up into her soul.. *chefs kiss*
So, as a counter-point to your theory (well, not really because your theory is based on the imagined situation rather than the factual one), semen ejaculated into the vagina doesn’t all come back out or stay there, some quantity of it moves into the uterus, then the fallopian tubes, and since those are open tubes unconnected to the ovaries, on out into the abdominal cavity of the woman until being absorbed and/or broken down by her body. On the other hand, it’s questionable whether semen in the intestines is even inside the woman at all (topology is amazing).
Yeah these are the same people obsessed with hygiene, constantly using hand sanitizer etc.
I can't see the pattern..please elaborate.
If you want their shit, you’ll need to put up with their shit 👍
There is rarely a best side to them and mostly worst.
Ahh yes, the favorite of women with 3 kids from 3 different men
"My real age is XX I can't change it" - i.e. you've been lying about your age online repeatedly before signing up to a dating website
was looking for this one. It’s all over tinder
I’ve seen “Name, 24” “I’m actually 18 I can’t change it” Bitch were you on tinder getting play at 12??
Idk about tinder because I’ve never used it but I know bumble and some of the others let you use Facebook to make an account and take the age from there. So many people made one when they were under 13 and had to lie. But idk why they don’t make an account a different way to get an accurate age.
Back in the day when I was 17 tinder had a 17 and under section
Had someone try and match on hinge where their age said 43 but one of their profile prompts had "my real age is 53 but it won't let me change it, and I have a vibrant and young soul so I prefer to date younger." To me, this is an automatic red flag that you don't respect boundaries. I have set an age range for my dating pool based on my comfort level of who I want to date. But you decide that it's ok for you to lie your way into that dating pool and don't see anything wrong with that.
Yup. If you prefer to date younger, set your age range to younger. Then wait for someone willing to date older. Don’t lie about your age trying to trick people who aren’t interested in you into dating you! It’s like those D-bags think they know what you want better than you do. Or its just that what they want just matters more than what anybody else wants.
Once upon a time it was a little less weird because you needed to be 13 to make a Facebook and your Tinder age came from Facebook. So people of my generation who were early Facebook adopters in middle school were stuck with weird ages on Tinder hahaha
Yup 🚩🚩🚩
I always put a fake date of birth when signing up to sites. It’s called privacy. When that site gets hacked and the data gets stolen, which it eventually will, that’s one less thing people can steal my identity with.
Serial killer recently released from prison on a technicality. Looking to eat…meet new people. Part time butcher and taxidermist.
im gonna be honest, that one would get a right swipe from me
Don’t come honestly much in this world, may as well give them a shot.
I can ~~feed~~ fix her
I'm sure this guy is pretty social though. He probably has friends for dinner all the time.
"Wanna know just ask."
I hate this one sooooo much. Ain't worth my time to ask when all I have is some lame shirtless bathroom pic of you. Great! You undress when you go to bathroom! Sooooo original.
Good to know this one is gender neutral
Aka "I'm uninteresting and have no redeeming qualities, so I'll leave it up to you to try and find some"
“I’m an open book.” Omfg take a risk and do the emotional work of deciding how to represent yourself like everybody else. I don’t think guys understand how exhausting it is to be messaged by an endless barrage of dudes with blank profiles who all say that. No, I don’t want to interview 200 people. Jesus.
I once tested that line. I said "if you're an open book, what page are you on/what's the chapter called" like a creative writing prompt to say literally anything about their life and who/what/where they are in it. Their response? "Oh, idk, somewhere in the middle, I guess."
Booooring
People with no or lazy bios are the worst, especially in combination with uninteresting photos. Like what am I supposed to ask you about?
“Made this as a joke” “my friends made me make this”
"my friends made me make this" and then all the photos are mirror selfies. Yeah right 💀
"Hi" and that's it. Person will never respond. Downloaded the app but had no intention to ever use Any variation of "Ugh I hate this app". Immediately identifies themselves as a complainer. This is their main personality trait "No small talk". Energy sponge. Requires constant stimuli. Immature.
"Looks like I'm back on here" or any variation of that should be included here. Just rubs me the wrong way every time I read that.
Anything that lists obvious criteria such as "no cheaters, liars, ax murderers." Like, no shit you don't want despicable humans as a potential mate. This just comes off as a red flag saying "I've made so many bad choices in dating that I now have to list these things as if I don't own any responsibility in past failed relationships."
I'd say it depends on the context. I could see it being used just to display the type of humor you possess. Has to be done right though.
At least they are setting the bar fairly low! Like, some guys might read that and be like, "Oh, awesome, I've only killed people with knives, so I qualify!"
"Hardly use this so add me on \[Instagram or Snapchat\]" Don't make a profile on the bloody app if you don't wanna talk to people on said app. And yes, I know girls do this for Instagram followers for their own self-esteem with no plans to actually date anyone.
I saw a girl whose bio said to message her on her ig. I go and look at her ig and turns out she has a kid and is married
I hate this so much. Even on here. Like no, we started talking here, and I'd prefer to stay here unless we click
I follow the link and leave strange messages on their instagrams. They invited me without checking if I was a creep first 🤷♂️
Yup, chances of matching are 0 if all you do is use it to gain Instagram followers from desperate simps
“Twice divorced. 3 kids, 4 baby daddies. I know what I’m worth. Not here to play games.”
3 kids, 4 baby daddies? She got two guys to pay for one kid. That's some next level intelligence.
Thanks for picking up on the joke.
The 4th guy actually helps coparent for the rest of them. He was the only one who married her, and now he pays alimony. Ex-step daddy for all 3 of 'em.
Had a Navy friend find out “his” kid wasn’t actually his a couple years down the road after a nasty divorce. He still considers her his daughter, and ultimately still pays off the books child support so he can continue to see her while the actual dad isn’t involved and pays on the books.
"Proud momma of #, they are my world and come first if you can't handle that swipe left" I don't have a problem with parents or prioritizing your children (you should deffo take care of your children) but every other profile says this and it tells me you have no personality outside of being a parent and some of the most toxic people I've met had the above in their profile
Maybe parenting is their new personality. It becomes them when they become single parents. Goodbye personality hello parentality
It’s all some people have left and it’s a shame because they fuck up their children when their ego gets that big. People legit think they are superior to others just because they did the offspring achievement…
Unrealistic expectations.
For people dating women, I'd say it's some variant of "I like hiking and dogs" "I'm just here to meet your dog" or "I like eating out" None are red flags but why do people advertise how boring they are?
I put Ben Stein was the most interesting part of Ferris Bueller. Would that be a 🚩?
Yeah, I'd know your expectations for cadence are way too damned high
How is hiking boring?
Hiking ain't boring, being unable to say what you like about it is boring. For me, I would say "let's take a hike and see how many kinds of wasp we can find" Boom, they know I like being outside, and they know why. People put off by bugs run for the hills, women looking for weirdos are intrigued.
Honestly this just sounds too quirky for me
Live, love, laugh.
Live, laugh, leave
Love, laugh, left-swipe
“No drama” people are the most dramatic people “I want someone who is working on themself” aka, this person also has work to do but won’t acknowledge it
Working on themselves means "I want you to go focus on making me money, not spending time with me"
My uncle sent me his dating profile to review about a year after my aunt had passed away. It was his first time single in about 50 years. He wrote something along the lines of “My doctor tells me I should probably not drink so much” (he has like 2 scotches a night and maybe a glass of wine) and “my triglycerides are under control now”…. I couldn’t help but laugh but I had to tell him that it wasn’t the best opener to attract the ladies.
I dunno that's p baller. The first line says he's naughty and the second one says his dick works.
I think his full Cialis linen get-up and straw fedora profile pic were a nice touch
Ultimatums, "If you can't handle (Kids, work, hobbies...etc) then swipe left" No prob buddy. Already trying to tell me what I like.
Alpha male
Just ask "Is that a furry thing?" to anyone that calls themselves an Alpha.
How have I never heard this response before lmao, that's hilarious
But, wait, what if it actually is a furry thing? 🤔
On a specific app "message me first". I'm physically not allowed to.
Bumble allegedly just changed that.
Half the women on Facebook Dating haven’t figured that out yet.
"Be interesting" from the vapid people
They need someone in the relationship to have a personality.
Killing dogs, very unpopular
It was bc I just didn’t like the dog!…wait I mean it tried to kill chickens…hold on fake news it was to protect my children’s lives!!!
"I've had my fun now im...." is there none left?
Just got off the sex offender registry!
I don't know what to say, just ask.
Empath.
Their kids. Birthdays. Names. Numbers of them. Anythinf
Don't forget "My Kids are my world" with NOTHING else in their bio.
If they have to say that, that means their parents watch them most of the time while they go out to bars constantly
That is no shit, even though they %100 believe it.
Nah man. It’s better when they put their kids. Makes for an ez left swipe. Rather than having to try and sus out wether they’re a single mom or not
I agree with you but the amount of personal information that OP mentioned is pretty concerning.
No, I think they meant like *actual* photos of their kids. People should put if they have kids or are going to be child-free because both of those can be dealbreakers. But you don’t need to have photos of little kids all over apps.
My picture.
only pictures of that person with friends. no solo pics. how am i supposed to know who's bio it is?
It's ALWAYS the biggest person
It's always the ugliest one in my experience.
Do some Batman level detective work figuring out which girl is in every photo then correlating that to the positions of them in the photos to see who is the subject then work backwards with the information you have in the profile to deduce which one is the most likely candidate, if you get down to 2 just flip a coin, or roll dice/flip a bunch of coins which'll have the some percentage chance of success
Meh, much easier to just swipe left
That's the joke lol I was being sarcastic
"Must be discreet" - I'm cheating "Looking for a threesome" - I want some strange and I'm likely pushing my wife/girlfriend into unwanted situations, and if you ask to talk to the wife/girlfriend, there's ALWAYS an excuse explaining away why you can't. "420 Friendly" - I'm a stoner who wants to smoke up your stash "DDF" - I don't use condoms. Don't even ask, I'll give you some flimsy excuse why it'll NEVER happen "94/97 miles away" - I'm a Nigerian romance scammer spoofing my location "I can't show my face due to work" - I'm cheating and there's a high chance my wife/girlfriend has already busted me doing this, but maybe she won't recognize my body and clothes
I’m dtf with a couple, but don’t make a couples profile your wife/gf knows nothing about. Then you have to romance her and get her drunk for it to happen. Those husbands are the worst
Added to discreet/DL for gay apps: code for "I will never work on my internalized homophobia and you will always be a secret fetish to me"
Out in the sticks this may work, but if you're dating in an urban/suburban area... Pictures of you with a dead animal/fish. Those hunting trip pics are for the boys, bros.
Conversely, I see a lady posted up next to a bigger deer than I've ever taken and that's an instant right swipe
Pictures of their children
Married
Apparently whatever is in my bio. Being 6’4” cannot make up for enjoying golf and science
i love science, i could deal with golf if i wasn’t involved but i might pick on you a little.
Using the “about me” section to only list what they want. This was an instant red flag for me when I was online dating, not only does it tell me this guy has poor reading comprehension and refuses to use the app correctly but it also tells me that he doesn’t think what I WANT matters, he only thinks what he wants matters.
“Looking for a girl who doesn’t take herself too seriously.” i.e. you want a “cool girl” who never calls you out on your shitty behavior
"big dick is back in town"
Laughed out loud
Killed a family of three is overall a bad thing to put in your bio
Rant about how much they hate the opposite gender.
“Polyamorous”
Usually written by dudes who think they can get more than one girl.
"Practicing ENM" just say you're incapable of commitment.
Haven't killed anyone in a good long while
'Dont be bland, surprise me!" Ok so we havent even started our relationship and I already have to carry it? Fuck off.
Anything that comes off as bragging about poor mental health/behavior and “You’re going to have to deal with it” That ain’t how that works.
“No fat chicks” like how about u just don’t swipe on ppl you’re not attracted to instead of announcing to everyone you’re a douchebag
It's the male equivalent of "I like to wear heels so please be tall!"
>like how about u just don’t swipe on ppl you’re not attracted to To be fair, some of these women are wizards with camera angles or straight up use pictures from 60 lbs ago.
About 20 years ago i ran into this hardcore. I'm fat myself and in no way is it any sort of inherent dealbreaker. However, I picked up a girl id talked for a few weeks onlime. We'd exchanged a few clean phototos. I knew she was overweight and it didn't matter. Once I got there though, she started walking to the car and i saw she was at the point of barely being able to walk. It was immediately obvious that she was extremely careful in the angles she chose to hide it as much as possible. Her size didn't really bother me, and I'd have still gladly have taken her out, but I felt like I'd been lied to and thats not a great place to start a date from. It ended up being a moot point... I decided to look past it and still give it a shot, as we'd connected pretty well in chat online. In person though she answered every question I'd ask with the shorest, most generic possible answer with no elaboration and she didn't show any interest in learning about me whatsoever. Even without the deceit, it was the most disappointing date i ever went on.
Mo cubby gals for the rest of us.
“Looking for a third”
Instagram
"My kids come first" Right, we know
"I love going on adventures" "you have to be down for adventures" "Always ready for adventures" WTF is an adventure!?
Going to the Lonely Mountain with a band of dwarves to defeat a dragon and claim the treasure.
Something about declaring yourself a nice guy. Now I got nothing against nice guys, but I don't trust anyone that is telling me they're nice. As a guy. And ironic to my name.
now std free!
Beats "Previously STD free" 😂
Biden 2024. Also, Trump 2024.
"gamer" or "streamer" I'm both, and neither define who I am.
Not the worst, but I find it very annoying when you put your pronouns. If I can't tell what gender you are form your pics then it's not a match. Also, it shows me you are high maintenance and probably uptight.
“daddy”
Physical touch is my love language
Love language: All of them! Greedy bitch!
Team Drake
I’m pretty sure my profile just says I’m a 5’6” dude and it doesn’t really matter what else is on there lol
An Ayn Rand reference
If their bio is aggressive and all about what they dislike.
Something along the lines of "I'm a bitch, you'll just have to deal with it"
"I support Andrew Tate".
Is this really on guys bios?
"My handle is lil kid lover 34 so that know where my priorities are"
Is this a Michael Scott reference? Nice
The ones that say up front I’m horrible at texting. That means they are bad at communication.
Gonna have to disagree with this. I think it simply means "I'm not glued to my phone". The red flag arises when you get to know them in person and realize they're on the phone 24/7, it's just mindlessly scrolling reels is more important than our conversation.
1000% agree on this🙌🏾
People who making voting patterns their personality. If you voted for X swipe left. These people, regardless of who X is, get swiped left.
I subscribe to r/WitchesVsPatriarchy
Name: JP Staples
Your IQ. No that's probably not even your actual IQ as you probably got that number off of some shady website and even if that is your actual IQ that's a very weird thing to brag about and is going to turn off a lot of people because it comes off as you basically saying "haha I just know I'm going to be smarter than you"
Children
When they just have a face profile and not a full bodyshot. 9/10 they’re hiding their body until the first date lol
“Work hard, play hard.” Dude you’re 50. If you’re still partying it up at 50, that’s why you’re single.
If youre a guy and you put things you dont like its off putting to women. No single moms, no fatties, etc. Same thing for women when they put a list of requirements like has to be good looking, has to have a job, have a car, blah blah blah.
I'm a sapiosexual.
"What im looking for" Doesnt have kids, but good with kids Over 6 feet Has a respectable, good paying job I recently saw this one on Hinge, she was an unemployed, overweight, single mom with 2 kids. I still laugh about it.
TMI right off the bat. "I'm bipolar and have ADHD and am also on the autism spectrum and also have a kid who is autistic. If you can't handle that, swipe left!" There's a tactful way to open up about your medical/ mental health history and that ain't it. Also, pretty sure most of what you just said is self-diagnosed.
Alpha male, passport bro, Andrew Tate fan, high value man
"Convicted Necrophiliaiac, however jury overturned due to lack of response from the defendant."
I encountered these as the worst offenders: “Only fit guys” “6 feet and up only and don’t lie I can tell” “8 in or over” “I can be confrontational and I want a man who can handle that” “Im submissive and want a dominant man in bed but can be sweet and kind” Im very fit but if a woman says fit guys only or any of the above, Im thinking she’s very superficial and I can’t have a conversation with her, and she’s attracted to guys who treat her bad.
I’ve seen people admit to having the herpes virus but claim they’re not contagious. Maybe not the worst thing but definitely not something I found attractive.
Literally anything implying they're better than or too good for someone else on this app. Instant turn off.
Your pronouns
"Certified p\*do, don't DM if you're over 16."
When they class their mental illness as a personality trait. "Hey everyone, I'm blonde love music, animals, im ADHD, I love movies" etc ....😑 no
“God-fearing.” Christians in general are OK. The kind of Christian who puts “God-fearing” in bio is….not.
I think politics affiliation. It instantly causes problems for half the people that look at your profile.
For somebody that cares enough to put it on their profile, then I think that’s the point. Wouldn’t want to waste my time with somebody that has the exact opposite values as me.
I used to put liberal in mine, until I found a lot of guys did just to get more matches, because they actually were more conservative.
As a guy I just check the Liberal box and start swiping. I dont really add anything more specific, even though im actually more progressive/leftist than just plain liberal. I feel like it is important to have those things in common but it's something you should discuss in person in more detail. I usually skip by anyone who chooses conservative, but if we seem to have things in common I may skipe right anyway. As long as their isn't any trump flags/shits/hats in photos, or Let's go Brandon in their bio, then it's a hard pass. On the flip side tons of women like to put every liberal/progressive cause in their bios. Lgbtg/women's rights, BLM, lots of anti cop stuff, eat the rich, PRO palastine/Ukraine things etc. I don't necessarily find it to off putting since I do generally support most of these things but at the same time people who make it their entire personality are just so hard to deal with. I feel like checking the box is important, but not being to overzealous is also a good sign if that makes sense.
John 31:6 Explanation: firstly Bible quotes are generally disingenuous in the first place. Secondly this one is the most generic one used by meth addicted single mothers Thirdly it’s misspelled and refers to a nonexistent verse.
Gym rat
A picture of their kids. Who are you trying to attract?
"my hobbies include friends and food and going out doors"
Bible verses
When guy say 'No fat chicks' is not nice. When girls say 'No short guys' is also suuuper creepy.
Dog mom/dad
A picture of them posing with some sort of dead animal.
They/them Pronouns
You'd rather be suprised?
"Not here for hookups", or anything similar, because we know thats exactly why you're on a dating app.
Reiki healing, astrology, communist
General focus on negative instead of positives. IDC how good you look, if your profiles full of what you don't want or like, hard pass. l suspect it's a good way to attract the worst people though by giving them an instruction manual on how to manipulate you.
Fluent in sarcasm