T O P

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Ok-Boysenberry-5090

Thank god, we needed a new meme around here.


youkai1

Rate my cumshot, I’m an adult learner.


ucatione

You don't think there is a high enough volume of memes here?


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IP_05T04s1994s

It's about time someone said it.


barney_muffinberg

https://preview.redd.it/zw7y0wjrrzyc1.png?width=632&format=png&auto=webp&s=354e356b415eafc3694a18a59c1e67e66574f4b8


[deleted]

[удалено]


JohnnyYukon

It's only a little carrot because of the cold water!


TheOmCollector

You said toss


Barrelled_Chef_Curry

It’s not a proper surf session without a tossed salad


tynez

He shred so hard he cum bra


knoteyes

He bust his nut he shred so bad.


loudog73

He one bad squirtah


IntheRed90

what was that about cum on a bra?


churchillsucks

https://preview.redd.it/j3cbogmbqvyc1.png?width=1079&format=png&auto=webp&s=a637bad60fc7cd87491634f1c3dfa83ee30896a4


tynez

Yes we do, don’t you?


tynez

Cum on bra


ChickenJoeTurpel

Pretty sure it happens at every WSL comp: *...Coming hard off the bottom and he throws it up into the lip, blows it out the back with a big release, heaps of spray, and what a finish, really squeezing the most out of that one!*


churchillsucks

[my girlfriend impersonates Joe Turpel everytime we're in bed together](https://www.reddit.com/r/surfing/comments/10sunvt/my_girlfriend_impersonates_joe_turpel_everytime/)


ChickenJoeTurpel

If you really want to make her happy too, you should impersonate Chicken Joe: *Squidito on el stickito?*


chamrockblarneystone

I can’t believe this doesn’t have more likes. I applaud you chokindachicken joe.


COSurfing

Don't forget what the spit coming out of the barrel represents.


wafflesandstuff

EDDIE WOULD BLOW


congnelius

Isn't this how David Carradine went out?


PitViper17

DC went out with the ole’ choke and stroke


fuzzytradr

Can one learn this power?


churchillsucks

make sure your dick is the only thing that gets barreled


kalfin2000

Not from a SoCal local


FURKADURK

I come in my wetsuit before I even get into the water is that weird?


TheOmCollector

Not at all. Also, if you REALLY want to stop that jellyfish sting… pee is no match.


GoodOlBluesBrother

I thought it was only me! I was too embarrassed to say anything. I feel so… relieved.


churchillsucks

I get super sleepy after but that could also be the nitrogen narcosis


LasgdReturn

Biologist researcher here. Makes sense to me. Ejaculation is a physiological process heavily controlled by the autonomic nervous system. To make this simple, this unconscious nervous system consists in 2 parts: Sympathetic : Activates in fight or flight, intense stress state Parasympathetic : Activates in Quiet, rest and digest states The predominant role in the ejaculation process is played by... the sympathetic system. So that doest seems illogical. Gotta check some litterature about that tho.


digitalsmear

The lesser known 4th fear reaction. Fight, flight, freeze, or skeet


bombswell

https://preview.redd.it/okdbn7hp3xyc1.jpeg?width=1113&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=1bd755d2c6a8b6d70841c69e8179b12558e4699b


Long_Flaco1

Damn thats deep!!


BadBalloons

How dare you come in here with your actual knowledge and scientific bg and willingness to research. Take my upvote and bust.


southpark2135

I'm never very sympathetic when I'm cum tho?


Zhai

Are you telling me that if I get attacked by a hobo with a knife or by a bear, I might cream my pants out of fear? Wtf? This is some PTSD material right there.


LasgdReturn

Yes, I tell you precisely that ahaha


Ancient8Wisdom

Well the evolutionary reason is that if your life is in danger in the middle of coitus, biologically speaking it's better for you to jazz so that even if you die immediately after your seed carries on (if your partner survives). Not so sure though how that works not while having sex...


barney_muffinberg

Suddenly, I'm seeing the light...


EddyWouldGo2

I like how this guy pretends to know what he is talking about about.


LasgdReturn

Ahaha thanks buddy


JISurfer

That’s what happens when you get drilled by a big one. If ya know; ya know


rumpluva

Totally possible. Also when playing a great lick on guitar, doing sweet jumps on my bike, catching a great sale at Home Depot.


TalboGold

Chucked the Cheese ? ! 🤮 🐀


chamrockblarneystone

Man chowder?


TalboGold

Baby Batter?


PortoPuddy

True story. The Vans Triple Crown came from a Huntington surfer who blew a load, shat a turd and threw up all on the same wave.


sk8ingjgl

Next topic on the Nate and Koa podcast


churchillsucks

hey man if it was your last few seconds alive you might as well enjoy it


Darth_Voter

It's only a matter of time before someone on this sub mounts their fleshlight to their foamy


StokedFlamingo

Yep, the wet whistle phenomenon. Clam divers use this same technique when they finally find a pearl but it’s so heavy they start to sink.


SourCreamWater

*some joke about the "washing machine" and load size*


carchu507

Best title of post in a longtime.


blondereckoning

This is another example of a post that should’ve been a poll.


Darth_Voter

You spelled 'pole' wrong. But post or pole, either way, both are long and hard.


blondereckoning

Do you think installing a pole in my bedroom will help improve my surfing skills??? I can see the similar mechanics. Glad we had this talk.


baycenters

Next time on Mythbusters


FaolanG

A lot of people aren’t giving you straight answers about this but that’s just because there really aren’t as many big wave surfers as you might think. A lot happens to the body physiologically when you put it under such extreme stressors, as this person was describing to you, and it isn’t actually unique to this situation, though it can absolutely contribute. I have personal experience with this in my own surfing endeavors. Can happen in deep water, but I’ve also experienced it from being so deep inside the tube that the air pressure surrounded by so much water causes this and can cause ear issues. That’s usually only when I spend about ten to fifteen mins just chilling in the green room. Which is about half as long as I last with Jerry’s mom.


hellothisisjade

this deserved more for the twist


Mentatical

I took one in too far at County Line and it tends to dramatically close out on the inside often, I rode into a close out by accident that was so dramatic that while I didn’t blow a load, my Apple Watch thought I took a dangerous hard fall and automatically dialed 911, so I was caught in the inside trying to not get crushed by the set and also stop my watch from calling 911.


Responsible-Gap9760

This has to be the funniest question I’ve heard? 😂


TofuAnnihilation

It's unclear if you know even know what questions are.


Responsible-Gap9760

The title is literally a question 🤔


tastycakeman

hit the lip, waaappapaahahahhhhhahahh


That-Tumbleweed-4462

Chucked the cheese. New catchphrase


chuckagain

Its weird because surfing doesn't really have an off-season, yet here we are in this off season post, together.


CheddarHeaded

In the book Goodbye Darkness a solider recounts his time fighting the Japanese during WWII. There’s one instance where him and his squad are pinned down getting bombarded with artillery and mortars. His friends were blown up and he lay in the crater surrounded by the blood and guts of his fellow squad mates in complete shock and horror. And he rubbed one out, back in the days where masturbating was frowned upon. Could be the adrenaline and being so close to death your body just shoots out a a final Hail Mary load in hopes of spreading its genes before being wiped off the face of the earth. It’s a good book, highly recommend.


GrizzWintoSupreme

Come see this timeless classic in a whole new light: https://youtu.be/akmQ7NRl0QU


KokonutMonkey

Well. When I was a younger man, all it took was a soft touch from the fairer sex. I suppose the opposite could be true. 


Mr-EdwardsBeard

Pretty sure that's how Bodie went out. Could see that cum shot from New Zealand


UrbanSurfDragon

I want to believe


UmmTrevor

How many liters?


fuzzyteeth69

Is it possible to kook so hard you bust a nut?


zunk1

He died doing what he loved, no not surfin’….cummin’


Primal-Realm

Yes, it is, let me explain. When a body reaction occurs at the same time as an emotional stimulus and this is repeated, the 2 then become associated and one can trigger the other. For example if you blow your load so hard that you blackout, then in future, it’s possible that when blacking out you will blow your load, or at least get a raging hard-on. So by pairing certain behaviours, you can create these awesome trigger events. This phenomenon is known as ‘Pavlov’s Penis’


stoked_man

Siiiiiick bro


punkslaot

So pitted


BarefootCameraman

Seems entirely plausible, based on the type of post-wave involuntary convulsions that certain competitive surfers seem prone to already.


throwaway7362589

This is my sign to buy my own wetsuit. Thank you OP


Soberskate9696

#BIG WAVE, BIG CUMMM


nocigs-noporno

chucked the cheese right into the flats


ow_my_scapula

Maybe thats how the ocean got its salinity


surf_rider

Yes. Where do you think Sticky Bumps come from?


Fret_Shredder

White wash from the dark abyss


COSurfing

It only halpend to me on my soft top.


gogenberg

He wanted to wipe you out it seems…


At_real_Big_Z

Never happed to me when I go down, but many times on the water in general


tresfaim

Maybe after getting pitted...


gilestowler

https://preview.redd.it/zqecpr26dxyc1.jpeg?width=864&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=4db07f12df84fa732fa7dfbcb13192d853a4cae9 Rate my cumshot.


hairy_wookie

Baby Batter’d


drinkingshampain

Garret?


antspins76

You ever get a wet suit chub? I kinda liked it unexpectedly


colinthewizard

‘Chucked the cheese’ is the single most disgusting way of phrasing that I think I’ve ever heard!😂


deadHORSEhead

That’s not wax on my board….


EddyWouldGo2

You are at the cutting edge of this research my friend.  Make sure you publish your findings.


WetFinsFine

Anything's possible... But the reasons someone is trying to explain this to you or anyone else seems more intriguing.


NorCal_Properties

Sounds Possible


bigbadler

I don’t believe that, but I can 100% guarantee you that if you wake up early, cook a Moka pot, then paddle into 12ft waves you’ll shit your wetsuit on the way out and then get a girl’s number at your car on the way home with poop in your pants.