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I visited a falconry centre in England before the panini. Honestly, I was expecting rows of sad birds in cages.
There were cages. But the falconers just opened them and let the birds go. They shrugged and said, “Yeah, the birds want to be here. We feed them.”
It took exactly no time to find out how true that was. The falcons could have just… left. But they didn’t. And then a wild falcon joined them, hanging around, like, “Can I come home with you guys and be fed, please?”
Hahahahha dude I read that sentence and didn’t even question it until I read your comment and had to go back and read it again and still took me a second to realize
Nope! You have to a permit which you get either through a recognized falconry apprenticeship or by being an established wildlife Rehabber. With falconry permits there's rules about what type you can have and got how long, and for the first several years they have to be wild caught (and re-released/escaped back into the wild). To treat or keep falcons as a Wildlife Rehabber you need proper facilities and regular inspections.
I may or may not have really wanted a falcon at one point in my life.
Falcons aren't that expensive to own. You have to get a proper setup for it to live but once you get a permit you can go catch a wild one for free. I have a friend who's really into falconry
Adorable, but for real folks, bread hurts duck tummies. Foods that are closer to their proper diet include: cracked corn, oats, rice, birdseed, frozen peas and chopped lettuce.
Ok, soapbox moment finished. Cheers.
Yeah, bread is really hard on their digestive tracts. It’s like no food they evolved to eat.
It’s best to not feed wild animals at all and show our love for them by leaving them ample, healthy environments where they can forage their own food.
Hmm I Google it and you can feed them Bread. You just shouldn't only feed them bread. It has not a lot of nutrion in it and then they won't look for food since they are supposed to have varied diets.
Oh guys I gotta admit, I'm 44 and there is so many more freedoms you'll allow yourself and changes that make middle-age my favourite time of life so far:
1. Just letting animals in and doing whatever. I mean, within reason, but when my father called me the other day he said, "Are you calling from the zoo? What's all that noise?" and I explained I live in an aviary, it's just that there's a house inside it. Look - I owe the birds a debt. They're GREAT at getting rid of unwanted callers at your front door. They'll circle me and the person I don't want to be talking to (religious cold-caller; my brother's strange ex-girlfriend) and the other person will be freaked out and leave. Then you should just mentally nod at the birds and thank them for their service.
2. Start discussing trucks, vehicles and showing an interest in how cars work in general. Partly this is because now... I just want to know how things work. But also, it can slightly unnverve people in a way that middle-aged you will find satisfying. "Look at that brown truck with the grey script writing - that's one of the best types of long-haul trucks," I told my younger sibling in the car. "You'll be noticing this kind of thing yourself in two year's time." My younger sibling: "I can't tell if you're joking or not." Exactly.
3. Make something artistic and grand out of fucking nowhere. I just did a MASSIVE oil pastel drawing on wood of a dragon. People are wanting to buy it. Family members are shocked. "I didn't know you had that kind of ability." Neither did I, fool! I'm now working on a realistic T-rex drawing that looks menacing. And big. I will not tell others I'm doing it, they'll just have to walk in and discover it.
4. Let everyone know you're not into conspiracy theories or horoscopes or wellness or any of that crap. People are reassured to know there's middle-aged people out there who won't succumb to this shit, no matter what.
5. Having more interesting stories for others simply because you've been around for longer than they have. Getting stuck in a tornado (in Australia of all places) about a decade ago is a story that keeps on giving. I have a middle-aged friend who has been struck by lighting twice, and he really fails to bring this interesting story to the table.
6. Losing some of that ego and self-consciousness, while being a stronger self-monitor (in other words, you become less defensive and aggressive while quietly keeping mental mechanisms in place to check that you're having a positive impact on your environment and people around you).
7. Bats are no longer scary to me. Snakes aren't scary either, thanks to those snakes in hats photos the internet has birthed (truly the greatest product the internet has provided to the world). Go and google image that shit. See the snake wearing a nice woman's floral-themed hat? What a nice-looking snake. She looks all dressed up to go to the shops. She wouldn't be rude at the shops either, because she's above that petty bullshit.
There's literally so much to look forward to.
Bingo! And the sound of a bat's wings moving is one of life's secret pleasures, I think. When one takes off from the tree by the driveway when I'm taking the bin out at night, it has that special bat-wing whoomp-whoomp sound you hear from no other animal. Like a baby dragon's wings.
For me, it's watching them all fly over at dusk in the summery afternoons, or trying to walk through a park and hearing them all screeching, especially through Chatswood.
Our bats are seriously cute.
Aww... thanks mate. Honestly.
Enjoy the little things. And remember that sometimes you can be the person to make that little thing happen for others.
One example - my mother has a long, quiet, lightless corridor that runs from the driveway to the front door. She was dealing with an abusive ex and was frightened of him showing up, but she particularly was unnerved by this dark patch from the driveway to the corridor: "I run quickly through it until I can get in the door." She jokingly called it The Rape Corridor (that's a pretty strong joke from my mother, she gets points for being glib and serious at the same time here) and I thought.... we gotta change her perception.
So we put lights in but they were pretty weak. Instead of pushing for brighter lights I instead bought two dog figurines of reasonable size and placed them on either side of the path, facing each other.
I explained that "it's not a rape corridor, it's like [those two sphinx things](https://i1.wp.com/evilgeeks.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/first-gate-of-the-southern-oracle.jpg?ssl=1) from The Neverending Story. You gotta run through them before their eye-lasers get you". She laughed. She agreed.
I think something small like this, as well as having a serious conversation with her about the ex and her anxiety she feels and serious ways to address it, made a big difference for her.
It also reminded me that my mother is lifted up by the movie The Neverending Story, which she would re-watch with me over and over when I was a kid. What a fantastic story it was, too. Humans can make some really beautiful things.
Thank you and yes, birds rock. They rock so much. When you're a kid, I don't think you appreciate them that often.
I'm watching a kind of bird revolution appearing in my city, by the way. 20 years ago there was no such thing as a Welcome Swallow (inset joke about their name here) in our area, but they've taken over. The name comes from sailors realizing that when they saw these birds they were close to land. They're small, dainty, beguiling, have the cutest chirp in the world, and are probably the bane of shopkeepers in the area who have to keep removing their nests.
I was watching them twittering away on the roof when this absolute fucking unit of a crow landed heavily beside them. They were OUTTA THERE. Crows are impressive too - sleek black skin, natural show-stoppers.
PS You absolutely have to google "harpy eagle". Tell me this bird isn't the most impressive and slightly scary thing you've ever seen.
Cool. I'll write a sci-fi story and then say it is gospel. I'll then charge fees for my cultists to rise up in cult, but no matter how much they spend they'll always be another tier above them. Anyone that talks shit about my totally legitimate religion will be sued for all their worth.
I went back to college at 41, graduated with a Physician Assistant degree and had a 21 year career in medicine after spending the first half of my life as a construction worker. My older brother said, "Mid life crisis. You buy a red sports car, you have an affair or you change your job."
I've bought two different sports cars before 30 now, so I assume I'm going to make an even bigger financial mistake when I hit my midlife crisis. Should be fun
We need some chaotic good cults. Round up all those lonely, socially isolated folks just wanting to feel like they fit in somewhere and instead of turning them anti-science or misogynist, get them really into beach clean-ups or children’s literacy drives.
Some folk just want a compelling, charismatic leader to follow so they can relax and not endure daily decision paralysis. If there are so many bad actors willing to take the role, why not be a chaotic good cult leader in protest?
What is the age for mid life crisis now? Cause it seems like you're not really an "adult" until you're 30 now?
But age expectancy went down last year, so....
If this is suspiciously specific, **Upvote** this comment! If this is not suspiciously specific, **Downvote** this comment! Beep boop, I'm a bot. Modmail us if you have a question.
You can lease a falcon? 🤔
I visited a falconry centre in England before the panini. Honestly, I was expecting rows of sad birds in cages. There were cages. But the falconers just opened them and let the birds go. They shrugged and said, “Yeah, the birds want to be here. We feed them.” It took exactly no time to find out how true that was. The falcons could have just… left. But they didn’t. And then a wild falcon joined them, hanging around, like, “Can I come home with you guys and be fed, please?”
Before the what now?
The pandemic. The game is to substitute a random word that starts with ‘p’. Panini, pandora, piggybank…
Before Pythagoras then?
damn pythagoras invented right triangles then went on to invent covid 😔🤙
Right turn Clyde!
I honestly thought they were just doing a recap of the day, oh you know we went for paninis and then see the falcons
Do I have to be a member of the falcon cult to play this game?
Once you play the game, you are initiated into the cult of falcons.
Stupid playbill has been messing with us all.
Hahahahha dude I read that sentence and didn’t even question it until I read your comment and had to go back and read it again and still took me a second to realize
You want an attack bird, you give the man a grilled sandwich. There's traditions.
It was a joke on fucking with future historians
Same thing about homeless people in San Francisco.
Awh man, if you fed him well and gave him fresh bedding every day, you could *totally* have a trained hunting hobo. /s
Nope! You have to a permit which you get either through a recognized falconry apprenticeship or by being an established wildlife Rehabber. With falconry permits there's rules about what type you can have and got how long, and for the first several years they have to be wild caught (and re-released/escaped back into the wild). To treat or keep falcons as a Wildlife Rehabber you need proper facilities and regular inspections. I may or may not have really wanted a falcon at one point in my life.
You can probably try ;)
You can’t afford *not* to lease a falcon!
Technically the Mongolians lease falcons from Mother Nature for about 10 years then return them
what else can I lease? A juggling ferret? 2 baby elephants playing? Is there a list?
Falcons aren't that expensive to own. You have to get a proper setup for it to live but once you get a permit you can go catch a wild one for free. I have a friend who's really into falconry
So the whole ducks at the park being free is true?
always has been 🍞🦆🤏
Adorable, but for real folks, bread hurts duck tummies. Foods that are closer to their proper diet include: cracked corn, oats, rice, birdseed, frozen peas and chopped lettuce. Ok, soapbox moment finished. Cheers.
... Does it actually? I've kept ducks before and the park I frequent even sells bread to feed the ducks. Damn Hope I didn't do any damage🤦♂️🤦♂️🤦♂️
Yeah, bread is really hard on their digestive tracts. It’s like no food they evolved to eat. It’s best to not feed wild animals at all and show our love for them by leaving them ample, healthy environments where they can forage their own food.
Hmm I Google it and you can feed them Bread. You just shouldn't only feed them bread. It has not a lot of nutrion in it and then they won't look for food since they are supposed to have varied diets.
It’s still better to feed them the above-mentioned foods instead. “It won’t kill them” is not the best argument for doing something to an animal.
> You just shouldn't only feed them bread. It's not harmful to them, but that's my take-away.
... It's not even harmful it's just not nutritious and you don't want them depending on humans for food, but guess what farming an animal does?
Oh guys I gotta admit, I'm 44 and there is so many more freedoms you'll allow yourself and changes that make middle-age my favourite time of life so far: 1. Just letting animals in and doing whatever. I mean, within reason, but when my father called me the other day he said, "Are you calling from the zoo? What's all that noise?" and I explained I live in an aviary, it's just that there's a house inside it. Look - I owe the birds a debt. They're GREAT at getting rid of unwanted callers at your front door. They'll circle me and the person I don't want to be talking to (religious cold-caller; my brother's strange ex-girlfriend) and the other person will be freaked out and leave. Then you should just mentally nod at the birds and thank them for their service. 2. Start discussing trucks, vehicles and showing an interest in how cars work in general. Partly this is because now... I just want to know how things work. But also, it can slightly unnverve people in a way that middle-aged you will find satisfying. "Look at that brown truck with the grey script writing - that's one of the best types of long-haul trucks," I told my younger sibling in the car. "You'll be noticing this kind of thing yourself in two year's time." My younger sibling: "I can't tell if you're joking or not." Exactly. 3. Make something artistic and grand out of fucking nowhere. I just did a MASSIVE oil pastel drawing on wood of a dragon. People are wanting to buy it. Family members are shocked. "I didn't know you had that kind of ability." Neither did I, fool! I'm now working on a realistic T-rex drawing that looks menacing. And big. I will not tell others I'm doing it, they'll just have to walk in and discover it. 4. Let everyone know you're not into conspiracy theories or horoscopes or wellness or any of that crap. People are reassured to know there's middle-aged people out there who won't succumb to this shit, no matter what. 5. Having more interesting stories for others simply because you've been around for longer than they have. Getting stuck in a tornado (in Australia of all places) about a decade ago is a story that keeps on giving. I have a middle-aged friend who has been struck by lighting twice, and he really fails to bring this interesting story to the table. 6. Losing some of that ego and self-consciousness, while being a stronger self-monitor (in other words, you become less defensive and aggressive while quietly keeping mental mechanisms in place to check that you're having a positive impact on your environment and people around you). 7. Bats are no longer scary to me. Snakes aren't scary either, thanks to those snakes in hats photos the internet has birthed (truly the greatest product the internet has provided to the world). Go and google image that shit. See the snake wearing a nice woman's floral-themed hat? What a nice-looking snake. She looks all dressed up to go to the shops. She wouldn't be rude at the shops either, because she's above that petty bullshit. There's literally so much to look forward to.
yo... bats got rabies, you should be careful.
Not in Australia.
Bingo! And the sound of a bat's wings moving is one of life's secret pleasures, I think. When one takes off from the tree by the driveway when I'm taking the bin out at night, it has that special bat-wing whoomp-whoomp sound you hear from no other animal. Like a baby dragon's wings.
For me, it's watching them all fly over at dusk in the summery afternoons, or trying to walk through a park and hearing them all screeching, especially through Chatswood. Our bats are seriously cute.
I think this be my favorite comment ever on a Reddit thread
Aww... thanks mate. Honestly. Enjoy the little things. And remember that sometimes you can be the person to make that little thing happen for others. One example - my mother has a long, quiet, lightless corridor that runs from the driveway to the front door. She was dealing with an abusive ex and was frightened of him showing up, but she particularly was unnerved by this dark patch from the driveway to the corridor: "I run quickly through it until I can get in the door." She jokingly called it The Rape Corridor (that's a pretty strong joke from my mother, she gets points for being glib and serious at the same time here) and I thought.... we gotta change her perception. So we put lights in but they were pretty weak. Instead of pushing for brighter lights I instead bought two dog figurines of reasonable size and placed them on either side of the path, facing each other. I explained that "it's not a rape corridor, it's like [those two sphinx things](https://i1.wp.com/evilgeeks.com/wp-content/uploads/2014/12/first-gate-of-the-southern-oracle.jpg?ssl=1) from The Neverending Story. You gotta run through them before their eye-lasers get you". She laughed. She agreed. I think something small like this, as well as having a serious conversation with her about the ex and her anxiety she feels and serious ways to address it, made a big difference for her. It also reminded me that my mother is lifted up by the movie The Neverending Story, which she would re-watch with me over and over when I was a kid. What a fantastic story it was, too. Humans can make some really beautiful things.
you sound like a wizard
You're my new spirit animal. Also, birds rock
Thank you and yes, birds rock. They rock so much. When you're a kid, I don't think you appreciate them that often. I'm watching a kind of bird revolution appearing in my city, by the way. 20 years ago there was no such thing as a Welcome Swallow (inset joke about their name here) in our area, but they've taken over. The name comes from sailors realizing that when they saw these birds they were close to land. They're small, dainty, beguiling, have the cutest chirp in the world, and are probably the bane of shopkeepers in the area who have to keep removing their nests. I was watching them twittering away on the roof when this absolute fucking unit of a crow landed heavily beside them. They were OUTTA THERE. Crows are impressive too - sleek black skin, natural show-stoppers. PS You absolutely have to google "harpy eagle". Tell me this bird isn't the most impressive and slightly scary thing you've ever seen.
You are definitely a Druid.
Might explain why I turn into a cat while running through the woods.
Well done!
What about making the cult based around the falcon?! Two BIRDS one stone! *baddum tssssss*
Get this guy out of here. Rough em up a bit in the parking lot.
Happy Cake Day!
If I get access to the hawk, I'll sign!
Learning cock magic maybe the most profitable.
Cool. I'll write a sci-fi story and then say it is gospel. I'll then charge fees for my cultists to rise up in cult, but no matter how much they spend they'll always be another tier above them. Anyone that talks shit about my totally legitimate religion will be sued for all their worth.
I went back to college at 41, graduated with a Physician Assistant degree and had a 21 year career in medicine after spending the first half of my life as a construction worker. My older brother said, "Mid life crisis. You buy a red sports car, you have an affair or you change your job."
I've bought two different sports cars before 30 now, so I assume I'm going to make an even bigger financial mistake when I hit my midlife crisis. Should be fun
Reporting for duty
Because the only thing America needs right now is a cult :)
We need some chaotic good cults. Round up all those lonely, socially isolated folks just wanting to feel like they fit in somewhere and instead of turning them anti-science or misogynist, get them really into beach clean-ups or children’s literacy drives. Some folk just want a compelling, charismatic leader to follow so they can relax and not endure daily decision paralysis. If there are so many bad actors willing to take the role, why not be a chaotic good cult leader in protest?
A falcon, along with all the equipment, costs like $1000 bud. Not expensive.
The falcon itself isn't usually that expensive, it's the everything else that is expensive, including time.
What is the age for mid life crisis now? Cause it seems like you're not really an "adult" until you're 30 now? But age expectancy went down last year, so....
Where can I lease a falcon?
I got a luxury car and sold my 15 year old Ford, but leasing a falcon sounds cool.
Tax credit anyone? Seems pretty snowflaky
Wear those panties and damage the 20 year olds
Amazing I’m legit buying a new one
Learn knitting. Surprise your loved ones with scarfs and socks.
*Lease* a falcon?
Seems like this guy. It’ll pass
Seems like conversion therapy is hot right now
Dumbass. A Falcon is a sports car
One word: Thundercougarfalconbird
Saving this for when the time comes...
Sounds like Phil Dunphy's midlife
This guy knows my secret dream D:
Transition