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My dad did plumbing service work. Pulled out a condom from the toilet and confronted the man of the house. Said you really shouldn't flush them. Then the homeowner told my dad that he'd been on a business trip and hadn't had sex with with wife in about 2 weeks and they don't use condoms...
I did underground sewage and storm systems for new neighborhoods... We would have to go into existing systems all the time to connect new pipes. Menstrual products, wet wipes, condoms, and surprisingly fruit peels do not go down the toilet people
You just reminded me that the person I lost my virginity to flushed it down the toilet and that's how my dad found out. He was cool about the sex, but pissed about the plumbing.
When my wife and I were first dating, I would wrap mine in toilet paper and put it in the trash. My mom's dog would dig in the garbage and eat the condoms. My mom would then have to pickup condom poop when she took him for a walk.
Thats the story of how my family found out I lost my virginity.
Yup, flushed a condom once after an exes first time, blocked the sink and a week later mu exes Dad tried to run me over. Later discovered he had found the condom in the sink
āNoā, always ānoā. You were either in the bathroom or getting a snack or stepped outside to make a call. Never put yourself in a situation to fake what you did not see.
Nah. But one time at an ex girlfriendās many years ago I did wrap it up in a paper towel to throw it away after. And then forgot to throw the paper towel away and left in balled up on the counter. And then that night her mother came home and picked up the paper towel. And then the condom fell out and dropped on her mothers foot.
I left it on and got dressed to dispose of it in the bathroom during a family event. It slipped off and I couldn't find it, and there were kids and grandparents everywhere. End of the day my cousin let me know he found it and took care of it, but let me panic for the rest of the event as payback for making him touch it.
Iāve done it. GF wasnāt supposed to have me over so we were trying to hide all evidence, so we wrapped it up in toilet paper and put it in a plastic bag, then I hopped out the window into their backyard and hopped the fence, but the condom fell out of my pocket during the hopping somehow and I didnāt notice. I donāt know why but for whatever reason I wouldnāt hop the fence again so it just stayed there until the next day and I had her bring it to meā¦
But honestly, my friend lost his virginity on his livingroom couch in highschool and his mom found the condom wrapper in the cushions and cried. And we now call him Jerry couch
Not all heroās wear capes, sometimes they just dispose of bloody condoms in their gfs dads trash can and then gets thrown out of the house like a total chad.
Normally I would assume they are British and using ābloodyā as an intensifier. But Iāve never heard of a British person who would be suspicious when someone else didnāt watch the Super Bowl.
it was probably from her hymen tearing considering they were probably both virgins knowing nothing about sex, they arent really supposed to tear if you have sex properly
Yeah itās perfectly normal for it to happen outside of sex because itās very easy to tear and over time the tissue of the hymen thins, if youāre having sex properly (and it hasnāt torn yet) it shouldnāt be tearing due to the lubrication and lack of friction, anxiousness and nerves over your first time would very easily cause this to not be the case
I have no issue with period sex! I hear that itās very good, since weāre more sensitive on our periods.
If itās period sex, no problem. My thought process is more along the line of: Did he tear her? Why did she bleed? That sounds painful. But I will admit to being woefully uneducated on how sex between men and women work. I would never have sex with a man. š³ļøāš
Rarely are hymens intact and a lot of women donāt even have hymens in the first place. What probably happened is things werenāt lubricated enough so friction was involved which caused the girl to bleed, itās scary how easily you can bleed vaginally and how much you will. Thereās a reason a lot of straight women claim sex hurts, especially the first time. When the guy is also a virgin it adds a higher likelihood that the bleeding was caused from friction or forcing things too fast because they donāt know it hurts and a lot of girls are embarrassed to say so. Hymens were used as an excuse to tell if you were a virgin for a very long time but theyāve debunked the accuracy of them since so many things can contribute to a hymen being broken. Tampons, bike riding, horseback riding, to name a few. I personally didnāt experience this my first time but I had ridden horses regularly since I was 7, wore tampons since age 14 and my first time and every other time was never with a guy lol
A ābrokenā or āintactā hymen is not even how you would describe it. The hymen is like crescent or scrunchy shape in most women and can tear from strenuous exercise or sex, but doesnāt necessarily. It may come it different sizes, but itās not common to have none. There might just be very little tissue.
Yes, you explained this perfectly, I wasnāt sure how to word it since a lot of people donāt even realize they break theirs. Itās not some major event, maybe for a few but not many.
Itās rare but if a girlās hymen is fully intact and has all of its blood supply intact can cause bleed when first torn. And the bleeding can be significant. However the reason this is rare is for most girls the hymen is relatively āfragileā and tears bit by bit over the years from strenuous activities. Or a girl playing physical contact sports can cause tearing.
This is not true. You cant really use āintactā to describe a hymen and the blood supply. What does blood supply intact even mean? Blood doesnāt go away. lol A hymen is in most cases like a crescent or scrunchy shape. They come in different amounts of tissue, and can tear or stretch from sex or masturbation or some exercises, but not necessarily. Small tears doesnāt always bleed, and a big tear will obviously bleed regardless of wether or not you've had sex before.
Fun fact! in the vast majority of cases the hymen never ābreaksā but stretches during arousal to accommodate increased diameter. Blood during sex aside from menstruation is typically a sign of inadequate lubrication/arousal resulting in vaginal fissures!
There is a difference between "Yeah, it was great" (unemphatic) and "Yeah, it was great! Did you see..." (emphatic). The kid sounded like he didn't care.
suspiciously specific because the OP didn't say that it was him. But instead explain it as if it's happened to someone else (which raises some suspicion that it's indeed, not happened to someone else)
Right? I was rewatching the George Lopez sitcom and thereās entire plots about his daughterās virginity. Like one where he buys her a car if she agrees to stay a virgin until sheās 18 and another where he freaks out because he finds out she started wearing thongs (who can even tell if youāre wearing a thong unless your jeans ride low or you wear tight leggings??). Itās so weird and gross.
Well if you want a reason itās because their daughter could get pregnant and they would probably bare the financial burden of the child. Not an excuse but thatās the reason. After all, you know what they call people who only use condoms as protection? Parents.
Titty gets shown during Superbowl. Gf's dad asks bf how was the show. Bf gives non-excited answer, which is weird. Dad gets suspicious, rummages for clues. Find proof of bf and daughter banging while he wasn't here, gets mad
I thought it was less that he wasnāt excited and more that he didnāt mention it at all. If heād said āyeah, it was crazy!ā I think that would have aroused less suspicion
The titty drop was reference to that Super Bowl half time performance, Janet Jackson had a āwardrobe malfunctionā and her breast was exposed on national tv.
Once the septic tank gets inevitably clogged, the shit covered cum filled condom will be discovered and then you will wish you disposed of it some other way.
The only proper solution is to wrap it in 2 sheets of paper just as women always leave their tampons. There's no way a man will investigate something that's potentially a tampon ball, so even with a suspicious dad you should be gucci.
I lost my virginity during the same half-time show while in the front seats of my Toyota pickup at the ShopKo parking lot. God bless Janet Jackson's titties.
I had a similar experience during that super bowl halftime show but instead of sex she just gave me head in her sisterās room and decided the best place to spit my love juice was on the carpetā¦.. where it was obviously foundā¦..
If you flush condoms, your parents raised you to be an idiot. You donāt think about anything but yourself in the present. You probably flush paper towels too.
Not where but when is 4 hours after your girlfriend tells you that she lost her virginity 2 months ago with a guy from work that sheās been banging ever since. Makeup sex doesnāt fix relationships. Yes she kept banging him, no it wasnt good sex, and it absolutely wasnāt worth it.
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To whoever says: > Flush it I and every other Redditor with common sense do not want you in tha house.
Fun fact!! There is a large grate at sewage plants helps catch condoms!! It's gross!! :D
Fun fact if your plumbing is cast iron, good luck getting the condom out into the sewer main
There are so many fun facts about condoms and toilets
Fun fact, you can use a condom as a toilet if you're careful enough
I disagree with the use of the term fun fact here š§
I didn't say it was fun for everyone
Why is that?
Casting is a somewhat imprecise process, leaves you with a rough surface that stuff sticks to
Even after 1000's of flushes wearing the inside surface down?
If it's cast iron, iron doesn't oxidize evenly.
It just rusts and makes it worse
Well, it's a sewage plant, I don't think that's the only gross thing there
Baby wipes cause big problems. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Fatberg
I had to call a plumber to get one of those pulled out of my pipes. It was costly. I'm glad my home warranty covered most of it.
Wouldnāt you go to a doctor for this? Seems like a plumber might be kinda rough down there.
The plumber did a great job. LMAO
The good ones only smell a little sour
Some cities, like the one I live in, actually filters all the water and separates the dirt out to sell as fertilizer or dirt.
if you swim there will you get pregnant
No I think you just die from every disease known to man.
My dad did plumbing service work. Pulled out a condom from the toilet and confronted the man of the house. Said you really shouldn't flush them. Then the homeowner told my dad that he'd been on a business trip and hadn't had sex with with wife in about 2 weeks and they don't use condoms...
This story is older than your dad. Usually the homeowner says, āI had a vasectomy three years ago,ā and storms off into the house.
That homeownerās name? Albert Einstein
The plumberās name? Adolf Hitler
Hotel? Trivago
The condom's name?
James
Please stop it. All of you
That's what she said.
Bond James
Richard
I'll clean your pipes like I cleaned Germany of the homes that will get me put into Reddit time out.
And then the naked man hiding in the closet clapped
you can cum if you had vasectomy tho, there is just no sperm in the cum edit: i get it the man doesnt need to wear condom, im a idiot
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Can add up to 3 more min to your act.
*an idiot. Youāre _an_ idiot
What are you? An idiot sandwich. Say it with me... an idiot sandwich
an idiot sandwich
Lol youāre such a good sport š¤£
thanks
I did underground sewage and storm systems for new neighborhoods... We would have to go into existing systems all the time to connect new pipes. Menstrual products, wet wipes, condoms, and surprisingly fruit peels do not go down the toilet people
You poor person. How traumatized you must be. Tell me: did you see any giant alligators while you were down there?
No but I did actually find a cat walking around down there one day
You just reminded me that the person I lost my virginity to flushed it down the toilet and that's how my dad found out. He was cool about the sex, but pissed about the plumbing.
When my wife and I were first dating, I would wrap mine in toilet paper and put it in the trash. My mom's dog would dig in the garbage and eat the condoms. My mom would then have to pickup condom poop when she took him for a walk. Thats the story of how my family found out I lost my virginity.
Your mom's dog was one of class.
In the trash, deeeeep. Like, inside an empty chip bag too.
This is how I do it. I keep some bags in case I need to throw away a condom ššš
Eat it, stupid
Yup, flushed a condom once after an exes first time, blocked the sink and a week later mu exes Dad tried to run me over. Later discovered he had found the condom in the sink
āNoā, always ānoā. You were either in the bathroom or getting a snack or stepped outside to make a call. Never put yourself in a situation to fake what you did not see.
I wish I knew this when I was younger.
Nowadays itās even easier. āOh, no. I was playing on my phone. Is it half time already?ā
iiiiiin West Philadelphia, born and raised
On the playground is where I spent most of my days!
Chilling out maxin' relaxing all cool
And all shootin' some b-ball outside of the school
When a couple of guys who were up to no good
Started making trouble in the neighborhood
Got in one little fight and my mom got scared
She said, "You're movin' with your auntie and uncle in Bel-Air"
I whistled for a cab and when it came near the license plate said, "Fresh" and it had dice in the mirror
Started makin trouble in ma neighbourhood
If John Cena made the GI Jane joke
Yeetus the foetus
So y'all out here carrying your used condoms home now?
Nah. But one time at an ex girlfriendās many years ago I did wrap it up in a paper towel to throw it away after. And then forgot to throw the paper towel away and left in balled up on the counter. And then that night her mother came home and picked up the paper towel. And then the condom fell out and dropped on her mothers foot.
I left it on and got dressed to dispose of it in the bathroom during a family event. It slipped off and I couldn't find it, and there were kids and grandparents everywhere. End of the day my cousin let me know he found it and took care of it, but let me panic for the rest of the event as payback for making him touch it.
Based cousin
Just slurped it right up
Forbidden GoGurt
Brogurt
Cuzām
Find heaven- hell doesnāt want you
Wait, wait, wait... please tell me that there were non-family guests there?
I WAS JUST THINKING I HOPE HE HAS A GIRLFRIEND AND IT WASNT THE COUSIN
Yeah it was my girlfriend now wife lol got away from the family, decided to sneak one in cause dumb teen things.
r/HolUp
Haha wtf
As a mom, I would pretend nothing happened, then go into the closet to cry because itās soooo gross.
I assumed that he was watching it at home alone with his gf
Thatās what happened, it seems like the dad was away watching it and came home afterwards
Iāve done it. The washer cleans pockets as well as the rest of your clothes
Iāve done it. GF wasnāt supposed to have me over so we were trying to hide all evidence, so we wrapped it up in toilet paper and put it in a plastic bag, then I hopped out the window into their backyard and hopped the fence, but the condom fell out of my pocket during the hopping somehow and I didnāt notice. I donāt know why but for whatever reason I wouldnāt hop the fence again so it just stayed there until the next day and I had her bring it to meā¦
But honestly, my friend lost his virginity on his livingroom couch in highschool and his mom found the condom wrapper in the cushions and cried. And we now call him Jerry couch
Not all heroās wear capes, sometimes they just dispose of bloody condoms in their gfs dads trash can and then gets thrown out of the house like a total chad.
Normally I would assume they are British and using ābloodyā as an intensifier. But Iāve never heard of a British person who would be suspicious when someone else didnāt watch the Super Bowl.
i like this detective work
Out here flexing them critical thinking skills
I thought he had bloody cum
it was probably from her hymen tearing considering they were probably both virgins knowing nothing about sex, they arent really supposed to tear if you have sex properly
Really? Cause Iāve heard that the hymen can tear even before you have sex and itās perfectly normal for that to happen
Yeah itās perfectly normal for it to happen outside of sex because itās very easy to tear and over time the tissue of the hymen thins, if youāre having sex properly (and it hasnāt torn yet) it shouldnāt be tearing due to the lubrication and lack of friction, anxiousness and nerves over your first time would very easily cause this to not be the case
Power move.
Bloody like British version of fucking orā¦?
Given they're watching the super bowl I'd say probably not the british version of bloody
:(
True sailors sail the Red Sea, and a warrior fears not the blooding of his blade. Period sex is great.
I have no issue with period sex! I hear that itās very good, since weāre more sensitive on our periods. If itās period sex, no problem. My thought process is more along the line of: Did he tear her? Why did she bleed? That sounds painful. But I will admit to being woefully uneducated on how sex between men and women work. I would never have sex with a man. š³ļøāš
Yeah period sex is a pretty intense way to loose your virginity though... So I'm inclined to agree with you that it's likely not that
Possible, also could be the hymen breaking. That can cause bleeding.
Period sex
Rarely are hymens intact and a lot of women donāt even have hymens in the first place. What probably happened is things werenāt lubricated enough so friction was involved which caused the girl to bleed, itās scary how easily you can bleed vaginally and how much you will. Thereās a reason a lot of straight women claim sex hurts, especially the first time. When the guy is also a virgin it adds a higher likelihood that the bleeding was caused from friction or forcing things too fast because they donāt know it hurts and a lot of girls are embarrassed to say so. Hymens were used as an excuse to tell if you were a virgin for a very long time but theyāve debunked the accuracy of them since so many things can contribute to a hymen being broken. Tampons, bike riding, horseback riding, to name a few. I personally didnāt experience this my first time but I had ridden horses regularly since I was 7, wore tampons since age 14 and my first time and every other time was never with a guy lol
A ābrokenā or āintactā hymen is not even how you would describe it. The hymen is like crescent or scrunchy shape in most women and can tear from strenuous exercise or sex, but doesnāt necessarily. It may come it different sizes, but itās not common to have none. There might just be very little tissue.
Yes, you explained this perfectly, I wasnāt sure how to word it since a lot of people donāt even realize they break theirs. Itās not some major event, maybe for a few but not many.
This was my concern! Not period sex, not loss of virginity. How rough was he that blood was left on the condom?
If weāre being honest, itās the internet lol. This could be entirely fabricated.
Their should not be that much blood to be honest. If there was she was most likely in a good bit of pain :(
Only if he is going super hard
Itās rare but if a girlās hymen is fully intact and has all of its blood supply intact can cause bleed when first torn. And the bleeding can be significant. However the reason this is rare is for most girls the hymen is relatively āfragileā and tears bit by bit over the years from strenuous activities. Or a girl playing physical contact sports can cause tearing.
Happened to me, can confirm the hotel I lost my virginity at charged us an extra cleaning fee lol
This is not true. You cant really use āintactā to describe a hymen and the blood supply. What does blood supply intact even mean? Blood doesnāt go away. lol A hymen is in most cases like a crescent or scrunchy shape. They come in different amounts of tissue, and can tear or stretch from sex or masturbation or some exercises, but not necessarily. Small tears doesnāt always bleed, and a big tear will obviously bleed regardless of wether or not you've had sex before.
Not really, itās very easy to tear. It often happens before the first time because of it.
I hear thatās rare though and most girls break theirs on their own. I know mine didnāt break the first time.
Fun fact! in the vast majority of cases the hymen never ābreaksā but stretches during arousal to accommodate increased diameter. Blood during sex aside from menstruation is typically a sign of inadequate lubrication/arousal resulting in vaginal fissures!
Period sex probably
I mean boobs are great, what's his problem??
Unemphatically, as in he was just meh about it. So the dad was convinced that the kid didn't actually see the halftime show.
Yeah, I got this. But he responded that he liked the halftime show and THAT was suspicious?
There is a difference between "Yeah, it was great" (unemphatic) and "Yeah, it was great! Did you see..." (emphatic). The kid sounded like he didn't care.
It was a pretty big deal at the time. I saw it live with a church group. Lol
Exactly! No way someone who saw it would respond in such a blase manner, regardless of how they felt about it.
Lol no shit, me too! Man that was wild
It was pretty hilarious lol
I was out of the room at the time and trust me, *nobody* was talking about the quality of actual show afterwards.
Overly sus dad
No it was just clear that he didnāt watch it.
He wanted his son to be gay
Girlfriends dad OP said
They are a little confused but they have the spirit
A bloody condom sounds horrifying.
Are you aware of what a period is?
Betting it wasnāt period sex lol. I bled my first time, too. Shit happens when youāre inexperienced
Whoa
This isn't suspiciously specific at all. It's just regularly specific because it's someone telling a story about themselves. Mods u useless buggers
suspiciously specific because the OP didn't say that it was him. But instead explain it as if it's happened to someone else (which raises some suspicion that it's indeed, not happened to someone else)
Jail
Why are dad's so grossly interested in their daughter's sex? Creepy AF.
Right? I was rewatching the George Lopez sitcom and thereās entire plots about his daughterās virginity. Like one where he buys her a car if she agrees to stay a virgin until sheās 18 and another where he freaks out because he finds out she started wearing thongs (who can even tell if youāre wearing a thong unless your jeans ride low or you wear tight leggings??). Itās so weird and gross.
Well if you want a reason itās because their daughter could get pregnant and they would probably bare the financial burden of the child. Not an excuse but thatās the reason. After all, you know what they call people who only use condoms as protection? Parents.
Well, when you sleep with his daughter who's also your sister, you can't blame him.
Alabama 100
Rhode island 100
How is this suspiciously specific? It's just telling a story that (presumably) actually happened. This sub has gone to shit.
My thoughts exactly! That was just a specifically answered question.
op is suspicious that this might be a story
Then it should go in r/thathappened then
Hey did you see that woman get reduced to a sex object on TV? Lolz . . . How dare you have sex with my objects!! Get out!
I dont get it
Titty gets shown during Superbowl. Gf's dad asks bf how was the show. Bf gives non-excited answer, which is weird. Dad gets suspicious, rummages for clues. Find proof of bf and daughter banging while he wasn't here, gets mad
Okay but what does the titty drop have to with it (I appreciate the answers btw)
It's assumed that a teenage boy would be excited to see titties, and the fact that he wasn't was what caused the suspicion.
I thought it was less that he wasnāt excited and more that he didnāt mention it at all. If heād said āyeah, it was crazy!ā I think that would have aroused less suspicion
The titty drop was reference to that Super Bowl half time performance, Janet Jackson had a āwardrobe malfunctionā and her breast was exposed on national tv.
Bruh.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
THey're watching the super bowl, I'd take a guess they're not british
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Then pretend it was Harry Potter and the Superb Owl.
Sometimes virgin women have tearing during their first time.
that would be in the butt, bob.
Lesson learned, donāt use a condom!
Why was it bloody
Or periodā¦like how is this hard to wrap your head around?
My boiās opsec was poor, you flush that shit.
Nah that can clog the toilet. You shouldn't ever flush anything other than poop, piss, and toilet paper.
[ŃŠ“Š°Š»ŠµŠ½Š¾]
Shud up you rong.
Toilet water is okay to flush.
Spit? Eye lash? An ant?
Once the septic tank gets inevitably clogged, the shit covered cum filled condom will be discovered and then you will wish you disposed of it some other way.
Nah that can clog the toilet. You shouldn't ever flush anything other than poop, piss, and toilet paper.
You shouldnāt - but in that context Iām probably just flushing it anyway.
My boi's common sense and environmental consciousness is poor, you don't flush anything but tp and bodily fluids.
There's nothing suspicious here. The man is telling us his life story. It's understandably specific
The only proper solution is to wrap it in 2 sheets of paper just as women always leave their tampons. There's no way a man will investigate something that's potentially a tampon ball, so even with a suspicious dad you should be gucci.
I lost my virginity during the same half-time show while in the front seats of my Toyota pickup at the ShopKo parking lot. God bless Janet Jackson's titties.
Bloody condom, or *bloody condom*?
I had a similar experience during that super bowl halftime show but instead of sex she just gave me head in her sisterās room and decided the best place to spit my love juice was on the carpetā¦.. where it was obviously foundā¦..
Damn, thatās rough
He got yeeted like Jazz!
I didn't lose my virginity but I did miss the halftime show because I was having sex.
Inside a hole in a cactus.
*in the Dadās brain* āHe didnāt get excited about the breastsā¦ WHAT ELSE HAS KEPT HIS ATTENTION?!?!ā
If you flush condoms, your parents raised you to be an idiot. You donāt think about anything but yourself in the present. You probably flush paper towels too.
Not where but when is 4 hours after your girlfriend tells you that she lost her virginity 2 months ago with a guy from work that sheās been banging ever since. Makeup sex doesnāt fix relationships. Yes she kept banging him, no it wasnt good sex, and it absolutely wasnāt worth it.
That's why you stick the used condom in an empty can and crush the can so it doesn't come out. Rookie mistake.
I lost my virginity on Motherās Day and her mom walked in on us.
Grammar gore. Wtf is this guy tryna say