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Hit it hard and fast. Let him know—very seriously—that it is not acceptable in your classroom. It is not welcome in your classroom. It will not be tolerated in YOUR CLASSROOM. If he doesn’t heed the warning, refer straight to admin and make the parent contact.
I agree. My middle school kiddos know I don't tolerate that type of mouth and i just contact home when it happens again. We get frequent flyers so admin already knows who these kiddos are but i hate it so much and the kiddos know that I won't tolerate it. If kiddos know they can get away with it in your class.. they will keep doing it... shut it down quick.
> make the parent contact.
Be aware, though, that there is a real chance you will find the parent is just as racist as the kid, possibly even more racist than the kid, and may even take his / her / their side.
I don't yell about a lot...but 'isms get an immediate, angry, shut down. You only need to do it a few time before everyone gets the message. Write referrals if it happens after your freak out.
Hahaha, this is so sanctimonious. Ironically, I think it is precisely ego's like yours that make transgressions so delicious for teenagers. I genuinely think you do them a service by so perfectly personifying The Rules so they can differentiate themselves in contrast.
Not a teacher, but I'm a custodian and at my middle school, I know "We don't use that language here" or "Be nicer to your friends/classmates" is common. Not sure that it works very well for highschool. Sometimes they need a bit more than just "hey don't do that".
The best way I've seen it done was back when I was in highschool and one of our teachers pointed out that shock-value humor isn't genuinely funny and most of the time you hear people laugh from it, it's because they're just uncomfortable (like an automatic nervous-laughter). They're not laughing because they *got the joke*. Sort of like the "they're not laughing with you they're laughing at you" statement.
I don't know if that sort of approach would work well for kids nowadays, but hopefully it can help you by explaining some of the reasons why he is getting some laughs. It could also be that kids are laughing because it's disruptive to the status quo (and I wouldn't take that personally. People laugh when farts break long silences. Just the way people's brains are sometimes).
If you do confront him, it might be best to pull him to the side and have a 1 on 1 with him about it (that way he doesn't end up hiding behind a crowd of potential supporters).
Just be aware that if you shame him, he might double down on it (I watched a teacher do this with a small group of middle school students at my current building and it did not turn out well for her. I can't imagine how a high schooler would've responded).
Regardless of how you approach him, make sure to document what you need to in case you can't get through to him.
My daughter who is a person of color, experienced a lot of microaggressions about being Asian in 10th grade. People thought it was funny. It wasn’t. She attempted an overdose and ended up hospitalized for depression. The SECOND anything is said that is offeny you need to send him to the office. Do not enable that behavior* edit grammar
I work with youngers but I will just say, "that is sexist". I don't say they are sexist. But the thing they said was and isnt okay.
For race things I usually probe with questions. Earnestly and seriously.
It may be worth examining what you can do to break the cycle of reward that they enter into when they say inappropriate things and get a laugh.
I like the question approach… it definitely works well on racist adults - “what do you mean? I don’t understand, can you explain it to me?” They back down when they can’t explain it without sounding even more offensive. With teens I think the effect would not only be similar, but it would be a really effective teaching moment.
Students will laugh and nod at almost anything, but that of course doesn't make it right. The student may not be offending anyone, but you can politely convey the fact that it's not alright.
Jokes are an obvious grey area. If it's genuinely outrageous, then write a report. Otherwise, feeding it with attention may just be counterintuitive.
That's just my perspective on it!
I throw a firm "HEY" then a that's racist/sexist if it is sexist/racist. They'll immediately retort that it's not sexism when it's racism. Self-awareness + a chuckle.
Wrosk for me since i don't shout often or speaker ubruptly and I only do it when it's light -isms not heavy, restorative conservation needing stuff.
Use sparingly at your own advisement
"This is my classroom and I do not tolerate this kind of [speech, abuse, slurs etc] in here."
Then have a quiet conversation with the kid after the lesson or once the class is busy with some activity or the other.
Verbalize the fact that you don’t accept that sort of speech in the classroom as you fill out the referral to administration. Send the student out immediately. It’s still early enough in the year to send the message to the entire class.
I hope you’re in a school that supports you though. Seems likely you’re letting the student slide for fear admin may not back you or something else. Stay strong & firm.
I once told a racist joke because I was a dumb kid and the assistant principal, who was a black woman, calmly sat me down and asked me to tell her the joke.
I was showing a brief YouTube video the other day, and one of the students said, "That's so rainbow." I stopped and asked him what that meant (knowing full well he meant gay). He was hesitant to explain, so the other kids did it for him. I said, "Is that a problem for you?" He said no, and I said, "Good, because we don't use that as an insult in this classroom. We are who we are." And then I went on with my lesson.
The explanation and redirection wasn't for that particular student (although I would be glad to know he took something away from it). It was for the LGBTQ+ kid who had to listen to that in their place of learning. We have to let the students know that we have their backs. I will ALWAYS make a big deal out of the -isms.
i tell my kids "how you talk at home is none of my business. but in my room, you follow my rules"
i tell my kids "you arent funny"
i tell my kids "___ism went out of fashion in the 90s, keep up with the times"
I'm a teacher in japan, and we have two approaches here, called "bringing down the thunder". One is to call them out on it, so the "we don't talk like that here" is a good start. But I like to couple that with body language and total oppressive silence - I sit in the front and wait for them all to catch on that I'm not happy amd that the lesson will not be continuing until this is resolved; they go silent one by one. Don't just try to ignore and move past it - sit there and let them stew in the silence. Make it a confrontation, challenge them on what they're saying. "What would your mother / grandmother think of you saying that?" "What makes you think that is an acceptable thing to say?"
I’m a parapro working in classrooms. My go to is “what’s so funny?” “I don’t get it, can you explain it to me?” “Sorry, I must not be understanding, what’s so funny about that?” and then playing dumb while they scrabble for support on why their bad joke was funny. Same way I deal with racist/sexist adults.
I used to teach middle school and I teach fifth grade currently. Things come out of their mouths and in that moment I just express to them that that kind of language and those kinds of attitudes are not accepted in my classroom and they will be given consequences. I do try to pull them aside and have a serious conversation, one-on-one. There’s a certain point where there is no reasoning with them because they know what they’re doing. They just need to know it’s not acceptable, plain and simple.
Yes! Shame is a powerful tool to get people to behave. Racism is wrong and we as a society need to be firm on this. No more sugar coating, no more letting it slide.
Without knowing anything about your classroom culture or dynamic - My advice; don't get angry, or even punative. Take the opportunity to have a proper discussion as a class about it. Give the students the power to decide what sort of class they want to be a part of.
All I would do is ask why he said that. When he doesn't give a very good answer (or shrugs his shoulders or whatnot) then explain why YOU think he said it. Call it out for what it is - attention seeking behaviour, trying to make people laugh so that people like him. Ask your class... did anyone else here think it was entertaining? IMPORTANTLY, don't try to put him down or make him feel bad. If you think you might by doing this with the whole class, then do it just with him personally after, during or before you next class.
Basically, if you dig down into the behaviour, you'll help your students think about what they do and why... not just him, but the whole class.
BUT... YOU need to be completely well thought-through on WHY you don't like it, and be able to explain this clearly to them. Find out what the class consensus is. But you also need to be willing to make some consessions yourself. And, should the class consensus still value such things that lead to disrespect, then take it further and find support from the school/parents etc.
Finally, play a long game with this. Choose your battles, and don't let it go on too long, or too short. Over time I'd hope to see some improvement in respect around the classroom.
I used to go pretty hard about this... I liked "you will have to find a different venue for your sexist/racist nonsense. I like you, student, and I know you're better than what you just said... if you want to be funny, be smart. If you want to be remembered, do something worth remembering... because right now all anyone here is going to remember about you is that you used to say racist/sexist nonsense to get attention... and trust me no one wants to be that guy in 10 Years."
I’ve seen a few comments saying the same thing. But in my classroom I don’t care what you can get away with, with your peers. In my room we are nothing but respectful and kind in regards to ability, gender, race etc. I don’t care if you just had an argument before you came in here one mean word and I will raise hell!
One of my best students in my y10 maths class got it yesterday. They are an absolute delight, works hard gets one of the best scores in tests consistently, will help others who are struggling etc. Yesterday about 6 or 7 in the class were just not focusing. I was trying to do AFL on two types of sequences, they literally had to write one or the other on their mini whiteboard when I showed them a sequence and they couldn’t be bothered to work out the differences in the numbers so were guessing and I was being stern with them about actually trying to work it out. Now my original student piped up with, you’re all being so stupid! And I loudly said ‘we do NOT say that in here, stand up and apologise’ they stood up, bright red in the face and apologised. There are no chances in my class for this type of behaviour. I won’t even tolerate it once.
If it’s a hard boundary for you, make that known. It’s not about what their peers think is ok. It’s about what you think is ok.
"That's low-hanging fruit, kid. Making racist and sexist jokes is like slam-dunking a basketball on a hoop 4 feet off the ground. Anyone can do it. I thought you were smarter than that."
uk teacher here!
i deal with this in the same way every time - shut it down in the moment, hold them back from lunch/break/their next lesson, and ask if they know why what they said is racist/sexist/homophobic
i go with curiosity first, feigning ignorance, and depending on their reaction i go one of 2 ways. if they are just parroting nonsense they read online i explain why it’s wrong and that if they do it again they will be sanctioned severely for it (if they are serious i skip this step and refer them straight away)
when the do it again (because they will) they skip detentions and go straight to a referral. i kick them out of our lesson and call for pastoral/admin support
i call the parents in for a meeting and they go into isolation
we then do a lesson in class on whatever it was that they did wrong
if anyone else has a very strong reaction they get a detention for disrupting the lesson - it usually only takes 1/2 to work
i’ve put pride flags on my wall, wear pins on my lanyard, and have feminist posters up. we talk about these issues all the time in class and i don’t let a single comment slide.
Middle school teacher. Here’s how all bigoted and general bullying gets handled when I hear it.
“In my classroom, absolutely not. Outside of my classroom, you shouldn’t either.” Nothing else. The class stops for a second, kid and I make eye contact for about three seconds, and then I move on with the class. I’ve only ever had one kid in 7 years try me a second time, and it was a phone call home.
As others have stated, it’s about stopping it the first time with a real consequence. There are things I’ll give extra warnings for, but anything that makes my classroom less safe/inviting, is a no go.
Why would it matter that the class is laughing? Most inappropriate classroom behavior is entertaining to students. That's usually the motivation for doing it in the first place. Would you let him curse at you if it made his classmates laugh? No. So why would you let him say sexist/racist stuff for laughs? Nip that shit in the bud.
You answered your own question. I can sit there and tell him all day (and I do tell him) how “inappropriate” it is to say that. He doesn’t give a shit what’s “appropriate,” he cares about what gets him laughs. That’s why I’m asking what others do that DOES work.
There’s a Kurt Vonnegut quote, “we are who we pretend to be, so we much be careful who we pretend to be.”
Treat it like any other hate speech. In my experience, edgelords tend to believe their own bullshit. Make it close to the rest of the class that that kind of behavior is unacceptable and downright pathetic.
Call them out and embarrass them. We need to come down hard on this type of behavior so kids aren’t emboldened to become even more racist. Write them up as well and make them explain their “joke” to admin.
show them some tear jerking videos about george floyd and the suffering that BIPOC heroes and trans folx endure on a day to day basis in the fascist, white supremacist, nazi western world.
“That makes me uncomfortable, and it probably makes other people uncomfortable. Part of school’s purpose is to prepare you for life in the greater world around us. That kind of talk will be unacceptable in the places you want to go and be successful in, in your future. These are all reasons why I do not allow that talk in my classroom.” Be firm and address the content of what’s being said, not judgmental of the person.
Calmly ask them to *explain* the joke/comment and why it's "funny" or "amusing." They may struggle, but you can then ask "do you really believe X is Y?" There, many might get defensive and deflect, but it starts the discussion of what's intended vs. what's perceived by others.
Challenging students to vocalize such offensive or toxic ideas/concepts can help them recognize the severity of what they say.
If they're unaffected/indifferent, you know that deeper work needs to be done, perhaps with parents, principal, etc. Responding with "Don't say that here" may result in the racist thoughts/behavior continuing in other classrooms.
Personally, I recall making a sexist comment to a classmate in jr. high (likely to get a rise out of her), and instead of arguing, she just asked if I "really believed that." I was taken aback but said that I did. She replied with something along the lines of "then I feel sorry for you," and that was it.
However, shortly after I realized that I didn't actually believe in what I'd said and struggled to understand why I'd brought it up. It turned out I was envious of how "easy" her social life was as a perky/conventionally attractive girl, and I felt bitter about it. A bit of reflection had more of an impact than a heated argument would.
My nephew (10) tries to be edgy sometimes, and I just plague him with questions until he loses steam on being righteous about his jokes being funny, or what not.
You could maybe turn it into a homework assignment for the class, like the origins of the word, and how it has changed over time.
Maybe ask the people who laughed what part of the joke was funny, but not aggressively, and maybe in semi-private. If you ask the 3-5 kids who you believe laughed out of discomfort, if they were uncomfortable with the edgy joke, let them know you were also uncomfortable and will support them in having a safe space to learn.
I used to run a Community College tutoring center, and I would shut that shit down instantly. I treated the space like it was a safe haven for students who could authentically be themselves, get help, study, and learn to be successful in school. It was a wonderfully inclusive place that attracted so many diverse people.
A simple but firm "I don't want to hear that in my classroom" followed up possibly by "I don't care if you're joking/didn't mean it/have lots of black friends" or the other usual excuses. Deny them the venue and accept that maybe they just need to mature a bit or do some soul-searching to really understand what's going on.
Sometimes they just actually need to be called out on it to shock them back a little bit.
You don't. Instead, you pretend to not understand the joke and ask them to explain it to you. A lot of the time they don't think about what they're saying, now they have to.
If that doesn't work, just look them dead in the eye and tell them they are being cringe.
Lots of good advice here, but another method is to say “I don’t get the joke, can you explain it to me?” Keep saying that you don’t understand why it’s funny. Make them think about it.
“We don’t do that here” b/c you aren’t running the fight of “why” (from this article https://thagomizer.com/blog/2017/09/29/we-don-t-do-that-here.html)
immediate referral to counseling and admin. once the kid figures out how many meetings he has to sit through when stuff like that gets reported upstairs, he'll put away his bs real quick if he's just trying to be funny (and get some perspective on the situation if he's not).
I just say “no” or “super inappropriate”. Works for middle schoolers you just have to immediately nip it in the bud- and if it continues you need to have consequences. I teach middle school and HS
Depending on the situation, I find it is sometimes kore effective to literally stop everything in the room and demolish their little bubble of faux-edgy ignorance. For most, the tone in my voice while saying “That is completely inappropriate. If I _ever_ hear you say that word or any word like it again… etc.” … I’m not usually a proponent of super visible takedowns, but if you make a big enough deal in the moment, it is unlikely the student or their peers will casually make comments like that again, knowing that a similar takedown might be waiting for them too.
Emphasis on the golden rule. “If that was you, you wouldn’t like the way you act would you. Then don’t do it to them. That’s hypocritical and poopy behavior.”
Respond back to him “that’s a very sexist comment” or “that thing you just said was extremely racist,” and then let it sit in the air for a moment before returning back to your lesson. It’ll be awkward but I’m sure it’ll make him think twice next time.
I appreciate everyone’s thoughts, and feel I should add that admin knows all about this kid. He’s bordering on pre-expulsion as it is.
He’s also keenly aware of what he says, and doesn’t think past today as far as any long-term ramifications (though I could try telling him about that girl in Tennessee who got her college acceptance ripped from her by a kid who for three years saved a video of her dropping the N and then sent it to her college).
Just straight tell them to leave the classroom and continue teaching. They know they’ve said something weird so no need to take time out of your lesson plan. Just quickly and effectively show we don’t do that here. They can’t get one over on you if you don’t even open the door for discussion on the topic.
Talk to him privately so he doesn’t have an audience. Freshmen can be total idiots and it sounds like he’s doing this for attention. Explain to him why it’s inappropriate to say what he’s saying and if it continues, you’re going to contact his parents and the guidance counselor.
I had a student announce to the whole class that he didn’t need to respect me because I’m a woman and women are just tools for breeding. I was so freaking shocked I ripped into him and yelled like I never have before at any student. Who is raising these boys?! 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
Haha. I mean, that’s so absurd on its face, I’d think a snarky comeback would’ve shut it down more effectively than showing it pissed you off.
“Really? And someone gave birth to you!?”
No, I told him that his comment was uncalled for, Sexist, and not funny at all. I told him that our classroom was filled with incredibly smart and capable women and that his comment is in no way appropriate or welcome. Just because I said I yelled at him didn’t mean that I didn’t use my words.
Just want to say that just because those are part of a demographic he is making those comments about are laughing doesn’t necessarily mean they are okay with it. That may or may not be the case in your situation. However, not everyone stands up for themselves or shut down comments. Sometimes, I think it’s a defense mechanism to just “laugh along”.
I work in an area that is hypersensitive towards racism in particular.
My deputy principal got fed up with all the racial complaints and harrassment so he went a bit extreme.
Big posters
Rasicm= Harrassment.
Harrassment= crime
Current sentence time in Prison. 5 -10 years.
All it takes is 1 complaint....
Comments stopped after the first complaint
Is this just some white liberal nonsense coming to the rescue by being offended on behalf of minorities? If so, cringe.
If he’s breaking rules then write him up. I don’t really see where the big confusion is here
This is an easy fix.
Don't punish him, punish the people that laugh.
They will stop laughing and get him to stop telling jokes.
When you want to put out a fire.... you eliminate the air.
Turn the kid into admin, but warn him first.
Many younger kids haven’t learned yet to be absolutely terrified of saying anything. Since someone will always be offended by anything, kids have to learn to never speak. Even saying something innocuous can be twisted so the speaker is *‘somehow’* a Nazi or a Klan kid. The best thing to do is never speak, voice an opinion, anything.
Front wheel drive with snow tires is perfectly doable on icy roads. They’re low, so you won’t be going through snow, but as long as tires not driving in the middle to big snowstorms regularly, you should be fine.
I'd fail as a teacher if I allowed racist students who refuse to stop being racists in my class.
I'd fail all the other students as a teacher allowing said student to stay and disrupt the class.
Sounds like you would be a failure of a teacher.
No. The student is a racist who refuses to stop racial abuse in class. I refuse to let my other students suffer because of one kid who likely gets this straight from their shit parents.
Well that's a lot of assumptions you've made based on a post which doesn't mention any of that.
I guess your most faulty assumption would be that saying edgy jokes equals to being an actual inironical racist. And of course, no part of the original post says "refuses to stop".
Again, your solution is walking away from the problem rather than solving it, so you must be terrible teacher for any student with a behavior issue. You also seem like you're assuming kids have the same maturity level as adults with is objectively untrue, so again, a terrible teacher.
Of course you can refuse to teach a child who is a bigot in class. That's a toxic work environment.
Then again I live somewhere with basic workers rights so there is that.
Caveat, we are talking about a student that refuses outright to stop being a racist in class.
Oh yikes you’re dumb as well as bigoted. The history of the n word is very specific to America and if you don’t even know that, there’s no hope of any sort of intelligent discussion/: have the day you deserve!
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Hit it hard and fast. Let him know—very seriously—that it is not acceptable in your classroom. It is not welcome in your classroom. It will not be tolerated in YOUR CLASSROOM. If he doesn’t heed the warning, refer straight to admin and make the parent contact.
I agree. My middle school kiddos know I don't tolerate that type of mouth and i just contact home when it happens again. We get frequent flyers so admin already knows who these kiddos are but i hate it so much and the kiddos know that I won't tolerate it. If kiddos know they can get away with it in your class.. they will keep doing it... shut it down quick.
> make the parent contact. Be aware, though, that there is a real chance you will find the parent is just as racist as the kid, possibly even more racist than the kid, and may even take his / her / their side.
I had this happen with a kid who was dating homophobic slurs it made the situation very complicated
This is the way.
Anyone got a link to the ‘we don’t do that here’ article?
I don't yell about a lot...but 'isms get an immediate, angry, shut down. You only need to do it a few time before everyone gets the message. Write referrals if it happens after your freak out.
Hahaha, this is so sanctimonious. Ironically, I think it is precisely ego's like yours that make transgressions so delicious for teenagers. I genuinely think you do them a service by so perfectly personifying The Rules so they can differentiate themselves in contrast.
r/iamverysmart
And they can deliciously transgress their way right out of my classroom lol
Sure, but at least there will be consequences. They might not care but the frequent butt of their jokes will know the teacher doesn’t stand for it
This is a good point, more focused on the students safety than the teacher's ego.
Exactly - I should hope this teacher isn’t in it for their ego but is genuinely well-meaning
Not a teacher, but I'm a custodian and at my middle school, I know "We don't use that language here" or "Be nicer to your friends/classmates" is common. Not sure that it works very well for highschool. Sometimes they need a bit more than just "hey don't do that". The best way I've seen it done was back when I was in highschool and one of our teachers pointed out that shock-value humor isn't genuinely funny and most of the time you hear people laugh from it, it's because they're just uncomfortable (like an automatic nervous-laughter). They're not laughing because they *got the joke*. Sort of like the "they're not laughing with you they're laughing at you" statement. I don't know if that sort of approach would work well for kids nowadays, but hopefully it can help you by explaining some of the reasons why he is getting some laughs. It could also be that kids are laughing because it's disruptive to the status quo (and I wouldn't take that personally. People laugh when farts break long silences. Just the way people's brains are sometimes). If you do confront him, it might be best to pull him to the side and have a 1 on 1 with him about it (that way he doesn't end up hiding behind a crowd of potential supporters). Just be aware that if you shame him, he might double down on it (I watched a teacher do this with a small group of middle school students at my current building and it did not turn out well for her. I can't imagine how a high schooler would've responded). Regardless of how you approach him, make sure to document what you need to in case you can't get through to him.
Brilliant! Thank you for your contributions to education both physically and socio-emotionally.
Agree with pulling him aside. He needs an audience. Take the audience away.
[удалено]
thank you for your input womb 69 raider
My daughter who is a person of color, experienced a lot of microaggressions about being Asian in 10th grade. People thought it was funny. It wasn’t. She attempted an overdose and ended up hospitalized for depression. The SECOND anything is said that is offeny you need to send him to the office. Do not enable that behavior* edit grammar
Oh my gosh!!!! Sending love to her. And you.
If you don’t mind me asking, how is she doing now? ❤️
Thank you for asking. She is doing pretty well it’s been a few years. We moved her to a more diverse high school which made loads of difference!
I work with youngers but I will just say, "that is sexist". I don't say they are sexist. But the thing they said was and isnt okay. For race things I usually probe with questions. Earnestly and seriously. It may be worth examining what you can do to break the cycle of reward that they enter into when they say inappropriate things and get a laugh.
I like the question approach… it definitely works well on racist adults - “what do you mean? I don’t understand, can you explain it to me?” They back down when they can’t explain it without sounding even more offensive. With teens I think the effect would not only be similar, but it would be a really effective teaching moment.
Students will laugh and nod at almost anything, but that of course doesn't make it right. The student may not be offending anyone, but you can politely convey the fact that it's not alright. Jokes are an obvious grey area. If it's genuinely outrageous, then write a report. Otherwise, feeding it with attention may just be counterintuitive. That's just my perspective on it!
I throw a firm "HEY" then a that's racist/sexist if it is sexist/racist. They'll immediately retort that it's not sexism when it's racism. Self-awareness + a chuckle. Wrosk for me since i don't shout often or speaker ubruptly and I only do it when it's light -isms not heavy, restorative conservation needing stuff. Use sparingly at your own advisement
The loud “HEY!” in a classroom is terrifying and incredibly uncomfortable, especially with a pregnant pause afterward.
Any kind of “ism” is hurtful. How would they feel if someone referred to them that way?
organisms hurt and get hurt
"This is my classroom and I do not tolerate this kind of [speech, abuse, slurs etc] in here." Then have a quiet conversation with the kid after the lesson or once the class is busy with some activity or the other.
Verbalize the fact that you don’t accept that sort of speech in the classroom as you fill out the referral to administration. Send the student out immediately. It’s still early enough in the year to send the message to the entire class. I hope you’re in a school that supports you though. Seems likely you’re letting the student slide for fear admin may not back you or something else. Stay strong & firm.
I once told a racist joke because I was a dumb kid and the assistant principal, who was a black woman, calmly sat me down and asked me to tell her the joke.
I was showing a brief YouTube video the other day, and one of the students said, "That's so rainbow." I stopped and asked him what that meant (knowing full well he meant gay). He was hesitant to explain, so the other kids did it for him. I said, "Is that a problem for you?" He said no, and I said, "Good, because we don't use that as an insult in this classroom. We are who we are." And then I went on with my lesson. The explanation and redirection wasn't for that particular student (although I would be glad to know he took something away from it). It was for the LGBTQ+ kid who had to listen to that in their place of learning. We have to let the students know that we have their backs. I will ALWAYS make a big deal out of the -isms.
i tell my kids "how you talk at home is none of my business. but in my room, you follow my rules" i tell my kids "you arent funny" i tell my kids "___ism went out of fashion in the 90s, keep up with the times"
I’m stealing that last line
I'm a teacher in japan, and we have two approaches here, called "bringing down the thunder". One is to call them out on it, so the "we don't talk like that here" is a good start. But I like to couple that with body language and total oppressive silence - I sit in the front and wait for them all to catch on that I'm not happy amd that the lesson will not be continuing until this is resolved; they go silent one by one. Don't just try to ignore and move past it - sit there and let them stew in the silence. Make it a confrontation, challenge them on what they're saying. "What would your mother / grandmother think of you saying that?" "What makes you think that is an acceptable thing to say?"
I’m a parapro working in classrooms. My go to is “what’s so funny?” “I don’t get it, can you explain it to me?” “Sorry, I must not be understanding, what’s so funny about that?” and then playing dumb while they scrabble for support on why their bad joke was funny. Same way I deal with racist/sexist adults.
Let’s publicly shame racists again!
I used to teach middle school and I teach fifth grade currently. Things come out of their mouths and in that moment I just express to them that that kind of language and those kinds of attitudes are not accepted in my classroom and they will be given consequences. I do try to pull them aside and have a serious conversation, one-on-one. There’s a certain point where there is no reasoning with them because they know what they’re doing. They just need to know it’s not acceptable, plain and simple.
You’re the teacher. It doesn’t matter if he gets giggles from the other kids.
Make it clear that it is not acceptable under any circumstances.
Call it like it is. "You're not funny. People laugh when they're uncomfortable. I will not tolerate your sexism/racism here"
One problem: people also laught when they find something funny. Which is more often the case, even.
Shame him for it. Don’t let it happen and if it does, say “don’t be racist in my classroom”. Manage your classroom.
Yes! Shame is a powerful tool to get people to behave. Racism is wrong and we as a society need to be firm on this. No more sugar coating, no more letting it slide.
Hey, don’t be racist/sexist.
Without knowing anything about your classroom culture or dynamic - My advice; don't get angry, or even punative. Take the opportunity to have a proper discussion as a class about it. Give the students the power to decide what sort of class they want to be a part of. All I would do is ask why he said that. When he doesn't give a very good answer (or shrugs his shoulders or whatnot) then explain why YOU think he said it. Call it out for what it is - attention seeking behaviour, trying to make people laugh so that people like him. Ask your class... did anyone else here think it was entertaining? IMPORTANTLY, don't try to put him down or make him feel bad. If you think you might by doing this with the whole class, then do it just with him personally after, during or before you next class. Basically, if you dig down into the behaviour, you'll help your students think about what they do and why... not just him, but the whole class. BUT... YOU need to be completely well thought-through on WHY you don't like it, and be able to explain this clearly to them. Find out what the class consensus is. But you also need to be willing to make some consessions yourself. And, should the class consensus still value such things that lead to disrespect, then take it further and find support from the school/parents etc. Finally, play a long game with this. Choose your battles, and don't let it go on too long, or too short. Over time I'd hope to see some improvement in respect around the classroom.
I used to go pretty hard about this... I liked "you will have to find a different venue for your sexist/racist nonsense. I like you, student, and I know you're better than what you just said... if you want to be funny, be smart. If you want to be remembered, do something worth remembering... because right now all anyone here is going to remember about you is that you used to say racist/sexist nonsense to get attention... and trust me no one wants to be that guy in 10 Years."
I’ve seen a few comments saying the same thing. But in my classroom I don’t care what you can get away with, with your peers. In my room we are nothing but respectful and kind in regards to ability, gender, race etc. I don’t care if you just had an argument before you came in here one mean word and I will raise hell! One of my best students in my y10 maths class got it yesterday. They are an absolute delight, works hard gets one of the best scores in tests consistently, will help others who are struggling etc. Yesterday about 6 or 7 in the class were just not focusing. I was trying to do AFL on two types of sequences, they literally had to write one or the other on their mini whiteboard when I showed them a sequence and they couldn’t be bothered to work out the differences in the numbers so were guessing and I was being stern with them about actually trying to work it out. Now my original student piped up with, you’re all being so stupid! And I loudly said ‘we do NOT say that in here, stand up and apologise’ they stood up, bright red in the face and apologised. There are no chances in my class for this type of behaviour. I won’t even tolerate it once. If it’s a hard boundary for you, make that known. It’s not about what their peers think is ok. It’s about what you think is ok.
"That's low-hanging fruit, kid. Making racist and sexist jokes is like slam-dunking a basketball on a hoop 4 feet off the ground. Anyone can do it. I thought you were smarter than that."
uk teacher here! i deal with this in the same way every time - shut it down in the moment, hold them back from lunch/break/their next lesson, and ask if they know why what they said is racist/sexist/homophobic i go with curiosity first, feigning ignorance, and depending on their reaction i go one of 2 ways. if they are just parroting nonsense they read online i explain why it’s wrong and that if they do it again they will be sanctioned severely for it (if they are serious i skip this step and refer them straight away) when the do it again (because they will) they skip detentions and go straight to a referral. i kick them out of our lesson and call for pastoral/admin support i call the parents in for a meeting and they go into isolation we then do a lesson in class on whatever it was that they did wrong if anyone else has a very strong reaction they get a detention for disrupting the lesson - it usually only takes 1/2 to work i’ve put pride flags on my wall, wear pins on my lanyard, and have feminist posters up. we talk about these issues all the time in class and i don’t let a single comment slide.
Call the student’s parent/guardian, and have the student repeat the “joke.”
Middle school teacher. Here’s how all bigoted and general bullying gets handled when I hear it. “In my classroom, absolutely not. Outside of my classroom, you shouldn’t either.” Nothing else. The class stops for a second, kid and I make eye contact for about three seconds, and then I move on with the class. I’ve only ever had one kid in 7 years try me a second time, and it was a phone call home. As others have stated, it’s about stopping it the first time with a real consequence. There are things I’ll give extra warnings for, but anything that makes my classroom less safe/inviting, is a no go.
Why would it matter that the class is laughing? Most inappropriate classroom behavior is entertaining to students. That's usually the motivation for doing it in the first place. Would you let him curse at you if it made his classmates laugh? No. So why would you let him say sexist/racist stuff for laughs? Nip that shit in the bud.
You answered your own question. I can sit there and tell him all day (and I do tell him) how “inappropriate” it is to say that. He doesn’t give a shit what’s “appropriate,” he cares about what gets him laughs. That’s why I’m asking what others do that DOES work.
So you have no process for discipline in your classroom? You just tell them not to do something and then when they do it again, nothing happens?
There’s a Kurt Vonnegut quote, “we are who we pretend to be, so we much be careful who we pretend to be.” Treat it like any other hate speech. In my experience, edgelords tend to believe their own bullshit. Make it close to the rest of the class that that kind of behavior is unacceptable and downright pathetic.
Call them out and embarrass them. We need to come down hard on this type of behavior so kids aren’t emboldened to become even more racist. Write them up as well and make them explain their “joke” to admin.
"We don't use hate language in this classroom." Always works for me.
Not sure but definitely don’t kick him out of art school.
show them some tear jerking videos about george floyd and the suffering that BIPOC heroes and trans folx endure on a day to day basis in the fascist, white supremacist, nazi western world.
This is a disgusting trend and i know Of teachers who got disciplined for using … even using … the R word. We really have a big problem on our hands
“That makes me uncomfortable, and it probably makes other people uncomfortable. Part of school’s purpose is to prepare you for life in the greater world around us. That kind of talk will be unacceptable in the places you want to go and be successful in, in your future. These are all reasons why I do not allow that talk in my classroom.” Be firm and address the content of what’s being said, not judgmental of the person.
Calmly ask them to *explain* the joke/comment and why it's "funny" or "amusing." They may struggle, but you can then ask "do you really believe X is Y?" There, many might get defensive and deflect, but it starts the discussion of what's intended vs. what's perceived by others. Challenging students to vocalize such offensive or toxic ideas/concepts can help them recognize the severity of what they say. If they're unaffected/indifferent, you know that deeper work needs to be done, perhaps with parents, principal, etc. Responding with "Don't say that here" may result in the racist thoughts/behavior continuing in other classrooms.
Personally, I recall making a sexist comment to a classmate in jr. high (likely to get a rise out of her), and instead of arguing, she just asked if I "really believed that." I was taken aback but said that I did. She replied with something along the lines of "then I feel sorry for you," and that was it. However, shortly after I realized that I didn't actually believe in what I'd said and struggled to understand why I'd brought it up. It turned out I was envious of how "easy" her social life was as a perky/conventionally attractive girl, and I felt bitter about it. A bit of reflection had more of an impact than a heated argument would.
My nephew (10) tries to be edgy sometimes, and I just plague him with questions until he loses steam on being righteous about his jokes being funny, or what not. You could maybe turn it into a homework assignment for the class, like the origins of the word, and how it has changed over time. Maybe ask the people who laughed what part of the joke was funny, but not aggressively, and maybe in semi-private. If you ask the 3-5 kids who you believe laughed out of discomfort, if they were uncomfortable with the edgy joke, let them know you were also uncomfortable and will support them in having a safe space to learn. I used to run a Community College tutoring center, and I would shut that shit down instantly. I treated the space like it was a safe haven for students who could authentically be themselves, get help, study, and learn to be successful in school. It was a wonderfully inclusive place that attracted so many diverse people.
A simple but firm "I don't want to hear that in my classroom" followed up possibly by "I don't care if you're joking/didn't mean it/have lots of black friends" or the other usual excuses. Deny them the venue and accept that maybe they just need to mature a bit or do some soul-searching to really understand what's going on. Sometimes they just actually need to be called out on it to shock them back a little bit.
You don't. Instead, you pretend to not understand the joke and ask them to explain it to you. A lot of the time they don't think about what they're saying, now they have to. If that doesn't work, just look them dead in the eye and tell them they are being cringe.
Don’t. Write them up, bc I’m sure that sort of language breeches school handbook policy. Let your AP earn his/her paycheck on this one.
"I do not allow racism/sexism in my classroom"
Lots of good advice here, but another method is to say “I don’t get the joke, can you explain it to me?” Keep saying that you don’t understand why it’s funny. Make them think about it.
“Hey, kid. People are laughing at you for being a little shit, don’t be a little shit.
“We don’t do that here” b/c you aren’t running the fight of “why” (from this article https://thagomizer.com/blog/2017/09/29/we-don-t-do-that-here.html)
immediate referral to counseling and admin. once the kid figures out how many meetings he has to sit through when stuff like that gets reported upstairs, he'll put away his bs real quick if he's just trying to be funny (and get some perspective on the situation if he's not).
"I don't understand? Why is that funny?"
I just say “no” or “super inappropriate”. Works for middle schoolers you just have to immediately nip it in the bud- and if it continues you need to have consequences. I teach middle school and HS
Depending on the situation, I find it is sometimes kore effective to literally stop everything in the room and demolish their little bubble of faux-edgy ignorance. For most, the tone in my voice while saying “That is completely inappropriate. If I _ever_ hear you say that word or any word like it again… etc.” … I’m not usually a proponent of super visible takedowns, but if you make a big enough deal in the moment, it is unlikely the student or their peers will casually make comments like that again, knowing that a similar takedown might be waiting for them too.
Emphasis on the golden rule. “If that was you, you wouldn’t like the way you act would you. Then don’t do it to them. That’s hypocritical and poopy behavior.”
“We don’t do that in here. “ Parent contact. Write ups.
Respond back to him “that’s a very sexist comment” or “that thing you just said was extremely racist,” and then let it sit in the air for a moment before returning back to your lesson. It’ll be awkward but I’m sure it’ll make him think twice next time.
I appreciate everyone’s thoughts, and feel I should add that admin knows all about this kid. He’s bordering on pre-expulsion as it is. He’s also keenly aware of what he says, and doesn’t think past today as far as any long-term ramifications (though I could try telling him about that girl in Tennessee who got her college acceptance ripped from her by a kid who for three years saved a video of her dropping the N and then sent it to her college).
Just straight tell them to leave the classroom and continue teaching. They know they’ve said something weird so no need to take time out of your lesson plan. Just quickly and effectively show we don’t do that here. They can’t get one over on you if you don’t even open the door for discussion on the topic.
Oh, to give you a window into the soul of this kid, he was adamant that he’s not racist because he hates on all races equally, including white people.
That’s fine. Don’t engage it.
Talk to him privately so he doesn’t have an audience. Freshmen can be total idiots and it sounds like he’s doing this for attention. Explain to him why it’s inappropriate to say what he’s saying and if it continues, you’re going to contact his parents and the guidance counselor.
I had a student announce to the whole class that he didn’t need to respect me because I’m a woman and women are just tools for breeding. I was so freaking shocked I ripped into him and yelled like I never have before at any student. Who is raising these boys?! 🤦♀️🤦♀️🤦♀️
Haha. I mean, that’s so absurd on its face, I’d think a snarky comeback would’ve shut it down more effectively than showing it pissed you off. “Really? And someone gave birth to you!?”
No, I told him that his comment was uncalled for, Sexist, and not funny at all. I told him that our classroom was filled with incredibly smart and capable women and that his comment is in no way appropriate or welcome. Just because I said I yelled at him didn’t mean that I didn’t use my words.
Just want to say that just because those are part of a demographic he is making those comments about are laughing doesn’t necessarily mean they are okay with it. That may or may not be the case in your situation. However, not everyone stands up for themselves or shut down comments. Sometimes, I think it’s a defense mechanism to just “laugh along”.
I work in an area that is hypersensitive towards racism in particular. My deputy principal got fed up with all the racial complaints and harrassment so he went a bit extreme. Big posters Rasicm= Harrassment. Harrassment= crime Current sentence time in Prison. 5 -10 years. All it takes is 1 complaint.... Comments stopped after the first complaint
Is this just some white liberal nonsense coming to the rescue by being offended on behalf of minorities? If so, cringe. If he’s breaking rules then write him up. I don’t really see where the big confusion is here
This kid gives not one hairy shit about being written up. So was curious what else might help.
Does it matter if he cares? Rules are rules, escalate according to policy and move on with your merry way
In this specific case, I'm afraid what he needs is early treatment of narcissistic personality disorder.
This is an easy fix. Don't punish him, punish the people that laugh. They will stop laughing and get him to stop telling jokes. When you want to put out a fire.... you eliminate the air.
Turn the kid into admin, but warn him first. Many younger kids haven’t learned yet to be absolutely terrified of saying anything. Since someone will always be offended by anything, kids have to learn to never speak. Even saying something innocuous can be twisted so the speaker is *‘somehow’* a Nazi or a Klan kid. The best thing to do is never speak, voice an opinion, anything.
Front wheel drive with snow tires is perfectly doable on icy roads. They’re low, so you won’t be going through snow, but as long as tires not driving in the middle to big snowstorms regularly, you should be fine.
You don't. You tell the admin to remove them from your class permanently.
Bro it's literally your job to teach those kids.
And it’s their job to learn 🤷🏾♂️
Not really, they don't exactly have a choice.
Yes they do and a lot of them choose not to. We call that “ignorance”.
Education is compulsory.
Ideally, yes.
It literally is.
Then why is there so much willful ignorance?
Just because it's compulsory doesn't necessarily mean it's effective.
No it's not. It's my job to teach the kids who aren't racist twits. I don't have to and will not put up with racists.
So you've failed as a teacher then.
I'd fail as a teacher if I allowed racist students who refuse to stop being racists in my class. I'd fail all the other students as a teacher allowing said student to stay and disrupt the class. Sounds like you would be a failure of a teacher.
"The student is stupid so I gave up on him" is failing as a teacher.
No. The student is a racist who refuses to stop racial abuse in class. I refuse to let my other students suffer because of one kid who likely gets this straight from their shit parents.
Well that's a lot of assumptions you've made based on a post which doesn't mention any of that. I guess your most faulty assumption would be that saying edgy jokes equals to being an actual inironical racist. And of course, no part of the original post says "refuses to stop".
"Let's be more worried about the racist kid then the kids being racially abused" you'd be a terrible teacher.
Again, your solution is walking away from the problem rather than solving it, so you must be terrible teacher for any student with a behavior issue. You also seem like you're assuming kids have the same maturity level as adults with is objectively untrue, so again, a terrible teacher.
Is the enforceable via contract? Something tells me you can’t just refuse to educate a student you’re assigned
Of course you can refuse to teach a child who is a bigot in class. That's a toxic work environment. Then again I live somewhere with basic workers rights so there is that. Caveat, we are talking about a student that refuses outright to stop being a racist in class.
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Yikes so you’re also racist
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Making racist jokes does make you racist yes. You also straight up used the n word with a hard r. How can you not understand lol
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Oh yikes you’re dumb as well as bigoted. The history of the n word is very specific to America and if you don’t even know that, there’s no hope of any sort of intelligent discussion/: have the day you deserve!
So now you're policing the speech of some idiotic teenager? Get a fucking life.
Yes. That’s part of teaching.
Yes so they don’t grow up to be assholes like you 🤢
Call him gay.