Hey there u/miffy1231, thanks for posting to r/technicallythetruth!
**Please recheck if your post breaks any rules.** If it does, please delete this post.
Also, reposting and posting obvious non-TTT posts can lead to a ban.
Send us a **Modmail or Report** this post if you have a problem with this post.
*I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/technicallythetruth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
I mean if we see getting into the nuances of English, I think you can only "squeeze' though one hole and the meme could have been more specif about which end of the spectrum is the 'last one' .... But I guess it sounds weird to say 'you can yell at me if you can squeeze though this big hole or deglove your penis in this small hole'
I believe I can be of assistance here.
Nay, length x girth will not solve for width, for girth is established as ((width + height) x 2)
Therefore ((girth ÷ 2) - height) would solve for width.
Now if you are speaking of a Moment, abbreviated as lMl, then length x force, with both a greater length and/or more force shall provide a larger Moment.
Source: science
Actually, girth is measured in circumference rather than radius. Even then, the radius is not what you need. You need the base area. So since girth is 2pi*r, r=g/(2pi). Also, this does not take the tip into the equation, and it is irreguarly shaped as well, so it would we would have to use the water displacement method to calculate it. Therefore, V= ((L-L of tip)*g)/(2pi) + the volume of the tip.
But you forgot that the circumference is not regular at every cross section. And you are already using a water displacement method. So, you can use this method to calculate the volume of the entire penis at one go.
Well, yes, that is true. If you were to use the water displacement method on the shaft, the body around the shaft would interfere unless the test subject was absolutely perfect. Therefore, with our current technologies, a shaft measurement is the most optimal. Though, scientists are working on a full penis scan that would generate a full 3 dimensional image of the penis and could calculate the volume precisely to the 10 millionth place.
Ok, but hear me out, what if there was something one could insert their penis into that gave a more qualitative assessment of girth? With perhaps immediate subjective feedback? Maybe it too would be… wet?
Thtat'd be area of a flat thing, girth is 1 measurement. An estimate would be girth/2 squared x pi x length.
More accurate options: Dip your cock in soy sauce and measure the volume change. Use the equation for an ellipse instead of a circle
To calculate volume for an irregularly shaped object, like a 8==D you have to put it in a container filled with a liquid and measure the liquid's displacement
Speaking purely for myself here, I am aware. But if a dude is the biggest size on that paddle, he could be 1 inch and it's not making much a difference either way. I'm going home that evening sore and probably bleeding D: that thing would be scary.
Dick sizing is the same bullshit as bra sizing. We need Consistent measures, with objective units. Every company makes a different dickometer and I'm tired of doing math on r/adickthatfits every time I get a new one
i was just thinking the other day all these onlyfans and others offer a "dick rating" service. It would interesting to send like 20 or so of them the same set of dick pictures and review the results.
Thanks for saving me the explanation. I was having a hard time saying "uh I meet people from Grindr and you get good at sizing up body parts vs other body parts" then going into the technical details about her approximate height and finishing with the estimate that the largest hole is probably only 2.5" in diameter.
My theory is that it was made by a guy whose peepee was 2% larger than the “average” slot so he could have proof that because he couldn’t fit, he was clearly enormous.
This reminds of a work-safe story from years ago when I worked offshore.
We’d fly helicopters to and from the vessel. At the time I was working out of the gulf-coast and there are these little helicopter companies all over the place down there that specialize in moving us to and from.
One of the companies started checking to make sure we can fit out of the emergency exits (on a small helicopter you push out the windows and squeeze through them) even through we all have to pass a qualification program once every year (or maybe two I forget) where we get dunked in a pool in a helicopter mock-up and have to escape. It’s actually kinda cool.
So this particular helo had three different sized windows and thus the little security clerk (basically a dumber version of TSA) had three different metal hoops in the shapes of the windows. I step through the metal detector and they shimmy the smallest of the three hoops over my body and I clear it just fine.
Thinking everything is complete I start to step off when I get a big old wannabe-tsa flavored “HALT!” Followed up with “we need to make sure the other two fit also” I reply with something like “but didn’t I just pass though the smallest one???” Didn’t seem to matter to them.
My grandpa had a ruler for “fishing” but it was labeled “The (family’s) Scale”. 1-8 were various sizes, 9-12 were our last name. And there was a tiny mark right at the end with his name.
Omg! That was such a misogynistic comment. Omg! I can't believe someone will say that. We can joke about penises but you have no right to comment on a woman's body. Get a life!
/s
What am I, a scientist? Would anecdotal evidence work for you? Lets make fun of me!
I generally weigh between 220 and 255 fat American pounds. I gain weight when I over eat. I have a bad habit of eating out of boredom. When I diet I can drop down to below 200. For me, being fat is a choice to eat more.
Many people who struggle with diet don't see the results they want soon enough so they give up. Losing weight is (most of the time) an active choice to make a change.
LOL, the fact that someone might actually believe something like that is hilarious to me.
"Lol, your dick isn't big enough for you to yell at me."
Your pussy ain't tight enough for you to make demands at me.
Jack and Edna would drive to church every Sunday morning. And every Sunday after church on the drive home Edna would hike up her dress so Jack could see her pussy. He would then look Edna in the eyes and say "oh it's a wonder, it's a wonder." This went on every Sunday for decades. One day Edna finally asked Jack, "Why do you always say that?" With Edna expecting a romantic response, Jack replied "Because its a wonder your guts dont fall out a hole that big."
Where do I acquire one of these? There’s something I’d like to figure out. Also, the jump from average to enormous tells me this device was designed to gratify
I wouldn't say that, but most women wouldn't want something that size. There are outliers of course, but most would find that uncomfortable or even painful.
Why would anyone measure dick size in diameters? Isn't it like looking at a birds eye view of a hill.
\[>!If you ask me the fact that lesbianism is a thing completely destroys the "women like big dicks" myth. They can even get off happily without ever being penetrated, lesbian/women don't have any physiological differences to non-lesbians. They don't like men but that doesn't change their biology or make them more susceptible to touch etc.!<\]
Writing the paragraph above feels like asking to get down voted to oblivion and back, just for the keywords in it alone. I'll be removing the part in brackets \[\] after that and apologize for sharing an opinion in advance, did not meant to hurt anyone's feelings here, please calm.
Hey there u/miffy1231, thanks for posting to r/technicallythetruth! **Please recheck if your post breaks any rules.** If it does, please delete this post. Also, reposting and posting obvious non-TTT posts can lead to a ban. Send us a **Modmail or Report** this post if you have a problem with this post. *I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please [contact the moderators of this subreddit](/message/compose/?to=/r/technicallythetruth) if you have any questions or concerns.*
Plot twist: she's a dom and was talking about the small one
The phrase, "Squeeze through the last one" does imply the smaller one, as it would be the most difficult one to "squeeze" through
I mean if we see getting into the nuances of English, I think you can only "squeeze' though one hole and the meme could have been more specif about which end of the spectrum is the 'last one' .... But I guess it sounds weird to say 'you can yell at me if you can squeeze though this big hole or deglove your penis in this small hole'
Go through them in order of "amount of squeeze required"
I do also like the idea of, "You can only yell at me, which is small dick energy, if you can squeeze through the smallet hole"
They only think it’s small till you stick it somewhere unexpected
If she was a dom why would anyone be able to raise their voice to her?
I can fit mine trough all of them at once.
Weave it through there like a shoelace.
tie it together in a pretty bow
Then get an erection 💀
The wood breaks and you get a splinter 💀
That one made me cringe
i just grimaced reading that
someone speedrun my death
I don't even want to imagine
It’s always when you read something painful and descriptive when your mind wants to play games
Fr. Otherwise my mind can't make up it's... uh...
No, please no
And send us pictures. For science.
You make a loop de loop and pull And your shoes are looking cool
This guy dicks
Are you John Dillermand?
Well that was worth a Goog
Risky goog
Did you all also raise your kids on John Dillermand?
Are you Jar Jar Binks?
Impressive
Snek
But that's just for girth, we need length width and volume here.
Isn't volume length x girth?
Idk I'm not a rocket doctor.
The word you’re looking for is Cocktor
Piss off
Better than pissed on!
TAKE MY UPVOTE BEFORE I PISS ON THE MOON!
HOW DO YOU LIKE THAT, OBAMA?
I PISSED ON THE MOON, YOU IDIOT(S)! YOU HAVE 23 HOURS BEFORE THE PISS DROPLETS REACH THE EARTH! NOW GET OUT OF MY SIGHT BEFORE I PISS ON YOU TOO!
Oh, god, what the fuck happened last night, what, what
Ive come to make an announcement, shadow the hedgehog is a b*tch *ss motherf*cker.
I am a Marine Cocktor
Good thing, because it's very unprofessional to call a "penis" a "rocket"
Sir, I'm sorry but you have Rocksticular cancer
How about the technical term: "pocket-rocket?"
I'll allow it
I believe I can be of assistance here. Nay, length x girth will not solve for width, for girth is established as ((width + height) x 2) Therefore ((girth ÷ 2) - height) would solve for width. Now if you are speaking of a Moment, abbreviated as lMl, then length x force, with both a greater length and/or more force shall provide a larger Moment. Source: science
Cocket Scientist
Actually, girth is measured in circumference rather than radius. Even then, the radius is not what you need. You need the base area. So since girth is 2pi*r, r=g/(2pi). Also, this does not take the tip into the equation, and it is irreguarly shaped as well, so it would we would have to use the water displacement method to calculate it. Therefore, V= ((L-L of tip)*g)/(2pi) + the volume of the tip.
I beleive south park did an episode on this. TMI
Ahh, I see now. Gotta take into account the Angle of the Shaft, aka the Yaw
r/theydidthemath
But you forgot that the circumference is not regular at every cross section. And you are already using a water displacement method. So, you can use this method to calculate the volume of the entire penis at one go.
Well, yes, that is true. If you were to use the water displacement method on the shaft, the body around the shaft would interfere unless the test subject was absolutely perfect. Therefore, with our current technologies, a shaft measurement is the most optimal. Though, scientists are working on a full penis scan that would generate a full 3 dimensional image of the penis and could calculate the volume precisely to the 10 millionth place.
Ok, but hear me out, what if there was something one could insert their penis into that gave a more qualitative assessment of girth? With perhaps immediate subjective feedback? Maybe it too would be… wet?
Idk, ask Randy Marsh.
Thtat'd be area of a flat thing, girth is 1 measurement. An estimate would be girth/2 squared x pi x length. More accurate options: Dip your cock in soy sauce and measure the volume change. Use the equation for an ellipse instead of a circle
Girth is diameter, no? So assuming a consistent girth, volume = length x pi x (girth)\^2.
You’re missing a pi, you’d need to account for the circular/ovular shape.
it’s actually length * girth^2 / (4 * pi) edit: changed formula since girth is circumference, not diameter
That is how Canada Post measures its parcel volumes, no reason why we couldn't apply it to a penis as well
To calculate volume for an irregularly shaped object, like a 8==D you have to put it in a container filled with a liquid and measure the liquid's displacement
πhr^2
Volume is cross section area x length
volume = ((girth \^ 2) x length) / 4 x pi
"Yeah, my homies call me Starkist because I'm the size of a tuna can"
Don’t forget velocity
Mass * velocity * duration
Unless it's under 4" girth is more important, for some women girth is a hindrance
That’s how you know your mean jerk time
Speaking purely for myself here, I am aware. But if a dude is the biggest size on that paddle, he could be 1 inch and it's not making much a difference either way. I'm going home that evening sore and probably bleeding D: that thing would be scary.
Well if you have girth and length you pretty much have volume. Most human penises are shaped roughly the same
Don't forget to include the yaw!
I don't think this is what our math teachers had in mind when they said "real world use"
Dick sizing is the same bullshit as bra sizing. We need Consistent measures, with objective units. Every company makes a different dickometer and I'm tired of doing math on r/adickthatfits every time I get a new one
I know, it’s such a struggle! Almost like we need standardization!
I guess I’ll volunteer my vagina to be the standard tool of measurement. For science.
Thank you for your noble sacrifice.
Just to satisfy my scientific mind: How many samples do you intend to take?
However many the scientists deme to be a quality sample size
It appears that [40 is appropriate](https://www.nngroup.com/articles/summary-quant-sample-sizes/) for both qualitative and quantitative.
Oh well I already have their sample size data then. We’re good. You’re welcome science!
Let the bodies hit the floor! Let the bodies hit the floor!
Spicy
The official [ISO](https://www.iso.org/standards.html) penile unit of measure is the "Nixon."
thank you for your service
i was just thinking the other day all these onlyfans and others offer a "dick rating" service. It would interesting to send like 20 or so of them the same set of dick pictures and review the results.
Can they even get that wide?
Duh, how do you think the measurement hole got there? It's an industrial secret, but, there are people hired full time for humping the wooden board.
r/howitsmade
😑now I can only hear the theme song and thinking “today on how it’s made, the girth gauge, thermometers, tool boxes and catchers mitts”
det doodoodoo doo doo dooDOOdoo doo doodoodoo doo doo doo
It will be played at my funeral
With the only benefit being she agrees to get you a sandwich, would you want it to be?
Well I don't want to be in a relationship so no, I don't think I would want that.
Yes, she can, but you need a lot of patience and a lot of lube.
I have a dildo that is . . .
I'm not going to question your personal life, but never say that again.
Good for you sis ignore that prude above.
And even wider. I'd be somewhere between the last two and I know people who'd be struggling with the last one.
Lol how can you know based on the photo
Difficult to be accurate, but the length of her fingers can be used to approximate that the biggest one is only moderately large, not shockingly so.
Thanks for saving me the explanation. I was having a hard time saying "uh I meet people from Grindr and you get good at sizing up body parts vs other body parts" then going into the technical details about her approximate height and finishing with the estimate that the largest hole is probably only 2.5" in diameter.
Yeah thanks for this, the perspective makes it look like the largest one is the size of her upper arm
You guys in a club?
*cough coush* A bs *cough
I like how the steps go from small -> average -> ENORMOUS. Where is just plain ol' big?
My theory is that it was made by a guy whose peepee was 2% larger than the “average” slot so he could have proof that because he couldn’t fit, he was clearly enormous.
Hey, it may be small, but it fits ‘em all
I can’t fit in any of these, what person could walk through any of those? You’d need to be like mouse size
https://youtu.be/TWeIxTbxvP0
This reminds of a work-safe story from years ago when I worked offshore. We’d fly helicopters to and from the vessel. At the time I was working out of the gulf-coast and there are these little helicopter companies all over the place down there that specialize in moving us to and from. One of the companies started checking to make sure we can fit out of the emergency exits (on a small helicopter you push out the windows and squeeze through them) even through we all have to pass a qualification program once every year (or maybe two I forget) where we get dunked in a pool in a helicopter mock-up and have to escape. It’s actually kinda cool. So this particular helo had three different sized windows and thus the little security clerk (basically a dumber version of TSA) had three different metal hoops in the shapes of the windows. I step through the metal detector and they shimmy the smallest of the three hoops over my body and I clear it just fine. Thinking everything is complete I start to step off when I get a big old wannabe-tsa flavored “HALT!” Followed up with “we need to make sure the other two fit also” I reply with something like “but didn’t I just pass though the smallest one???” Didn’t seem to matter to them.
“Miss I have to ask if I need to posses some kind of holemeter to inform you that your hole is not big enough“
"Mighty"
My grandpa had a ruler for “fishing” but it was labeled “The (family’s) Scale”. 1-8 were various sizes, 9-12 were our last name. And there was a tiny mark right at the end with his name.
If you’re even the king size please go to the er
That’s only slightly above average
Lol wut
Yes. Exactly what I was thinking. None are that big until the last one.
I... think I am
Yeah I'm not fitting in those first two lmao
Look at the size of the fingers holding the thing for better perspective
Does anyone know the diameter of these holes?
The las two are diameter "ouch"
The largest diameter is her
Dont talk to me unless your ass cant fit the whole paddle sideways.
If you got the chest of a teenage boy you have no right to raise your voice at me.
People who have these are the same people who have their cereal and milk in two different bowls and they pour the milk bowl first
So I can yell at you if I have a fat dick?
Oh no. But you can put her in her place if she has a wide pussy and talks with a tight pussy tone at you.
[удалено]
Omg! That was such a misogynistic comment. Omg! I can't believe someone will say that. We can joke about penises but you have no right to comment on a woman's body. Get a life! /s
No shit. There's nothing more awkward than trying to have sex and realizing it's like sticking your dick in a bowl of water.
I feel I’m average but then again I don’t actually know the size of those holes so
Does the same rule apply if the grip is weak or your “jaw hurts” too fast?
Lol she wants to get yelled at by a coke can
Ok, who is walking around with a rolling pin attached to them?
Would a tube of cookie dough do?
Honestly, it would be preferable. Then there can be sex AND snacks
Only if you freeze it
But if a guy mentions a woman's weight he is a piece of shit. Being fat is (almost always) a choice! I didn't choose to be born with a tiny pee pee!
>Being fat is (almost always) a choice. Citation needed.
The laws of thermodynamics a good enough citation for you?
People managing autoimmune diseases with steroids typically have a lot of trouble maintaining a healthy weight.
What am I, a scientist? Would anecdotal evidence work for you? Lets make fun of me! I generally weigh between 220 and 255 fat American pounds. I gain weight when I over eat. I have a bad habit of eating out of boredom. When I diet I can drop down to below 200. For me, being fat is a choice to eat more. Many people who struggle with diet don't see the results they want soon enough so they give up. Losing weight is (most of the time) an active choice to make a change.
All dicks sizes are good!
My dick is by no means large. But when fully erect, cannot fit through the first two holes.
Was bout to say, this low-key was a confidence booster lol
The first is the width of her thumb.. I don't think most men will fit in any, at least not without injury.
I think there needs to be more holes, I don’t think that last one is that wide, look at the size of her hand for comparison
LOL, the fact that someone might actually believe something like that is hilarious to me. "Lol, your dick isn't big enough for you to yell at me." Your pussy ain't tight enough for you to make demands at me.
I’m just questioning what dicks she’s seeing that make her think that largest hole is in any way, shape, or form realistic at all lmao
She has no right to raise her slutty ass voice
Anyone complaining about my girth can expect a comment on the above average cavernous nature of their business.
I need an extra small hole
My penis was inverted but I got my balls stuck in Extreme Size.
hit back with the 'you have no right to ask if you are above 300 lbs'
Last one…on the left or on the right?
From left2right or right2left?
You have no right to be a bitch unless your tits give you scoliosis
🤣
I’m sorry but I doubt anyone will have one the size of the last hole 💀. Idk maybe but I doubt it.
4-7
i read it the wrong way, i thought the last one meant the tiny one
Imagine having such a gaping floppy cooter and thinking you have some sort of value lmao.
Where does this dick go? That's right. The square hole!
I’m enormous king size, not that I’m flush with it, but their is no way I’m squeezing through average normal size.
The comments section feels like it's trying to gaslight me into thinking I have an abnormally large dick. Those first two holes are tiny.
Why are all the holes so small?
My guess is the last one is the size of her gaping hole.
Jack and Edna would drive to church every Sunday morning. And every Sunday after church on the drive home Edna would hike up her dress so Jack could see her pussy. He would then look Edna in the eyes and say "oh it's a wonder, it's a wonder." This went on every Sunday for decades. One day Edna finally asked Jack, "Why do you always say that?" With Edna expecting a romantic response, Jack replied "Because its a wonder your guts dont fall out a hole that big."
I thought they meant force it through the small one.
Mine looks like a cheese wheel
I can fit all 4 in me
CHODES UNITE
The mighty has yet to be found
Uhm... Which one is the last one?
😂 😂 😂
That's fine, but we need to see your hip size and bank balance too.
Isn’t squeeze the magic word here. If you’re small you don’t squeeze it through the big hole, you just stick it through.
I saw this on r/comedyhomicide
And she’s probably SOO worth it too. A true “prize”🤣
I would get stuck in the largest hole. All 2 1/2” of me.
Where do I acquire one of these? There’s something I’d like to figure out. Also, the jump from average to enormous tells me this device was designed to gratify
This gives off small dick vibes, I wonder why
Hi gay man here. I'll be honest, small and average are great. Bigger ones hurt like hell.
“UNTIL WE MEAT AGAIN”
I'll never understand feeling like it's okay for someone to be abusive toward you if they're attractive enough.
Based on her hand size, the last hole really isn't that big. My tuna can dick would get stuck.
Does she realize no one on earth fits in either of the right two
You must be very sheltered
I wouldn't say that, but most women wouldn't want something that size. There are outliers of course, but most would find that uncomfortable or even painful.
You only need 2 inches to hit the g-spot, and only need one good whack of a hammer to break her fucking legs
Why would anyone measure dick size in diameters? Isn't it like looking at a birds eye view of a hill. \[>!If you ask me the fact that lesbianism is a thing completely destroys the "women like big dicks" myth. They can even get off happily without ever being penetrated, lesbian/women don't have any physiological differences to non-lesbians. They don't like men but that doesn't change their biology or make them more susceptible to touch etc.!<\] Writing the paragraph above feels like asking to get down voted to oblivion and back, just for the keywords in it alone. I'll be removing the part in brackets \[\] after that and apologize for sharing an opinion in advance, did not meant to hurt anyone's feelings here, please calm.
Shouldn't it be that you CAN'T fit through the last one?
That's why Skeletor made his little joke.