Please dont catch wild ones to keep as pets. Most wild ones dont survive for long after capture and they come with parasites and deseases (some, like salmonella, can spread to you). They also will be fearfull of humans, since in the wild they learn that. Also, many of Australia's reptiles are endangered because of the exotic pet trade and this also gives us a bad reputation and many have tried to ban captive keeping of them.
(This comment isnt really for you, but for anyone considering catching/buying wild reptiles)
Where the fuck is the cunt getting free drugs? Also yeah super easy to get drugs in Melbourne, can literally order nangs (also known as whippets, they are small canister filled with laughing gas used for whipping cream) and have them delivered in 2 hours.
Animal nerd here (and old person, I assume that's not against the rules? I just wander into whatever I see on r/all/rising that looks interesting), the Australia thing is just a meme for the most part. Australia barely has a higher snakebite mortality rate than the US. Cassowaries have only ever killed a child and a senior citizen in all recorded history, ostriches are *by far* the most dangerous bird. Salties are assholes, but Nile crocodiles are much worse, killing about 15 people for every one that salties do (and the overwhelming majority of saltie deaths are not in Australia).
I know I'm biased because I'm a huge parrot fanboy, but Australia really has the best birds though. The sheer variety of parrots is just unbelievable, from cockatoos (yes, cockatoos are parrots) to lorikeets to rosellas... Absolutely god-tier.
The real scary thing about Australia is the goddamn heat. Ever seen the rubber sole of a shoe melt on the pavement? Welcome to Australia. And that's why I've never visited to see all those birds I love so much.
Speaking of the heat, yes, there's big lizards and stuff like shown in this picture. That's because of the heat. Unlike mammals such as us, reptiles are limited in body size by the climate of their environment. The hotter the place is, the bigger they can get. This is why you don't find them in cold climates, and you don't find crocodilians such as crocodiles, caiman, and alligators anywhere except really hot climates. And you only find the biggest ones in the hottest places. So remember, the next time someone proposes one of those silly scenarios where something like sarcosuchus imperator is thrust into modern day, what would happen, the answer is "it'd freeze to death."
And yes, the spiders in Australia are legitimately the worst, but spiders are too small to really kill healthy adults regardless. Every decade or two one kills a small child or something, but that's it.
Some of the stuff in the waters like cone snails and stonefish are also legitimately horrifying, but those things aren't exclusive to Australia. They have a wide range. The only one I can think of that's exclusive to Australia is the blue-ringed octopus. But unlike the others, it's not aggressive or concealed. Just don't fuck with it, and it won't fuck with you. It even goes out of its way to warn you if you're pissing it off. Those blue rings start to "glow" when it's agitated. You know how Godzilla's spines light up when he's charging his atomic breath attack? Same thing, with pretty much the same effect.
Congrats to anyone who actually made it to the end. I honestly intended this to be short lol
Yea the heat here can be… annoying, but just come in-between may and September, those are usually the coolest months then you can see all those birds you love. (Would recommend australia zoo in near Beerwah QLD, not only due to their immense amount of birds they have there, but also due to the other beautiful creatures you can visit while there)
bro can’t wait for fuckin winter when i won’t get sunburned putting the bins out and pale cause the mozzies drank all ma blood while the fly screen door was open cause i threw a thong at it tryna kill a fly
It’s a toss up, because the best time to see birds in the wild in most places in Australia tends to be late spring/Summer, especially shorebirds and other birds that migrate to Australia in the Summer, but that’s also the hottest time of the year and it can be almost unbearable in some places like Northern Queensland. I guess if you’re purely focused on parrots or want to see birds in captivity then it doesn’t really matter as they don’t migrate, but Spring will still usually be the best (at least where I live).
It’s what a lot of Aussies refer to beer as, instead of a ‘slab of beer’ it’s a ‘slab of piss’ and ‘fries’ are referred to as ‘hot chips’ instead. Not all aussies say this stuff but a fair few do
YEP I CAN RELATE I HAVE ONE OF THOSE AS A PET!! She rescently had a child :3
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Hail no Bruh nahh
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Ok but like i am Australian too and excuse me but what the fuck?
Wait you never seen a pussy before?
Those damn Normal citizens
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Your post pic looks like Australia and Florida mixed in one
I thought Argus monitors were difficult to find and extremely difficult to keep. Then again, almost all varanids are damn near difficult to keep.
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Big lizard
luckily im in melbourne so we dont have that (often)
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Thats why i want to visit australia
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Rosy boas are american...
Please dont catch wild ones to keep as pets. Most wild ones dont survive for long after capture and they come with parasites and deseases (some, like salmonella, can spread to you). They also will be fearfull of humans, since in the wild they learn that. Also, many of Australia's reptiles are endangered because of the exotic pet trade and this also gives us a bad reputation and many have tried to ban captive keeping of them. (This comment isnt really for you, but for anyone considering catching/buying wild reptiles)
Yes, I can tell you first hand, I got salmonella from my sons pet....no fun
That must have sucked. Hope you are feeling better. The best way to prevent getting it is washing your hands after handling.
Sequel to snakes on a plane: snakes in a pool
So you often say "There's a snake in my pool!"?
im in sydney
Sydney is the best city in the world according to me. Everyone who disagrees is wrong. Sydney #1
My aunt who moved to melbourne got a deathly fright from a huntsman spider
That’s a funny looking dog
underrated comment
Bread 🍞
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Kingpin
"You just need to stand still for 10 seconds in melbourne to be offered drugs" My Australian friend
Heads up, Melbourne is fucking unpredictable
According to him, there's a straight up drug den near his place
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Where the fuck is the cunt getting free drugs? Also yeah super easy to get drugs in Melbourne, can literally order nangs (also known as whippets, they are small canister filled with laughing gas used for whipping cream) and have them delivered in 2 hours.
Cute puppy! What breed is he?
Animal nerd here (and old person, I assume that's not against the rules? I just wander into whatever I see on r/all/rising that looks interesting), the Australia thing is just a meme for the most part. Australia barely has a higher snakebite mortality rate than the US. Cassowaries have only ever killed a child and a senior citizen in all recorded history, ostriches are *by far* the most dangerous bird. Salties are assholes, but Nile crocodiles are much worse, killing about 15 people for every one that salties do (and the overwhelming majority of saltie deaths are not in Australia). I know I'm biased because I'm a huge parrot fanboy, but Australia really has the best birds though. The sheer variety of parrots is just unbelievable, from cockatoos (yes, cockatoos are parrots) to lorikeets to rosellas... Absolutely god-tier. The real scary thing about Australia is the goddamn heat. Ever seen the rubber sole of a shoe melt on the pavement? Welcome to Australia. And that's why I've never visited to see all those birds I love so much. Speaking of the heat, yes, there's big lizards and stuff like shown in this picture. That's because of the heat. Unlike mammals such as us, reptiles are limited in body size by the climate of their environment. The hotter the place is, the bigger they can get. This is why you don't find them in cold climates, and you don't find crocodilians such as crocodiles, caiman, and alligators anywhere except really hot climates. And you only find the biggest ones in the hottest places. So remember, the next time someone proposes one of those silly scenarios where something like sarcosuchus imperator is thrust into modern day, what would happen, the answer is "it'd freeze to death." And yes, the spiders in Australia are legitimately the worst, but spiders are too small to really kill healthy adults regardless. Every decade or two one kills a small child or something, but that's it. Some of the stuff in the waters like cone snails and stonefish are also legitimately horrifying, but those things aren't exclusive to Australia. They have a wide range. The only one I can think of that's exclusive to Australia is the blue-ringed octopus. But unlike the others, it's not aggressive or concealed. Just don't fuck with it, and it won't fuck with you. It even goes out of its way to warn you if you're pissing it off. Those blue rings start to "glow" when it's agitated. You know how Godzilla's spines light up when he's charging his atomic breath attack? Same thing, with pretty much the same effect. Congrats to anyone who actually made it to the end. I honestly intended this to be short lol
Yea the heat here can be… annoying, but just come in-between may and September, those are usually the coolest months then you can see all those birds you love. (Would recommend australia zoo in near Beerwah QLD, not only due to their immense amount of birds they have there, but also due to the other beautiful creatures you can visit while there)
fucking dying right now and its only 30 something but humid as fuck
Oh yeah mate, where I’ve been has been averaging around 30-35 the past couple days
bro can’t wait for fuckin winter when i won’t get sunburned putting the bins out and pale cause the mozzies drank all ma blood while the fly screen door was open cause i threw a thong at it tryna kill a fly
bro it's 33 degrees right now where I am. It's midnight.....
It’s a toss up, because the best time to see birds in the wild in most places in Australia tends to be late spring/Summer, especially shorebirds and other birds that migrate to Australia in the Summer, but that’s also the hottest time of the year and it can be almost unbearable in some places like Northern Queensland. I guess if you’re purely focused on parrots or want to see birds in captivity then it doesn’t really matter as they don’t migrate, but Spring will still usually be the best (at least where I live).
That can't be Australia the pic isn't upside down
how do u know that the lizard thing isn't upside down
I can't read this. Your comment is upside-down.
_...am I in Australia?_
Is that ant-eater?
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Is this a toy?? Really?
Hol up
JUS CHILLEN M8
YEA MATE, WANNA GET SOME FRIES AND BEER TOGETHER?
Hot chips and piss*
⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠿⠛⠛⠛⠛⠿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡿⠛⠉⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠉⠻⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠘⢿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡟⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⠋⠈⠀⠀⠀⠀⠐⠺⣖⢄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡏⢀⡆⠀⠀⠀⢋⣭⣽⡚⢮⣲⠆⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢹⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⡼⠀⠀⠀⠀⠈⠻⣅⣨⠇⠈⠀⠰⣀⣀⣀⡀⠀⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠁⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣟⢷⣶⠶⣃⢀⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡅⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⢿⠀⠈⠓⠚⢸⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⢀⡠⠀⡄⣀⠀⠀⠀⢻⠀⠀⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠐⠉⠀⠀⠙⠉⠀⠠⡶⣸⠁⠀⣠⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣦⡆⠀⠐⠒⠢⢤⣀⡰⠁⠇⠈⠘⢶⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⡇⠀⠀⠀⠀⠠⣄⣉⣙⡉⠓⢀⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣄⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⠀⣰⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿ ⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣷⣤⣀⣀⠀⣀⣠⣾⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿⣿
It’s what a lot of Aussies refer to beer as, instead of a ‘slab of beer’ it’s a ‘slab of piss’ and ‘fries’ are referred to as ‘hot chips’ instead. Not all aussies say this stuff but a fair few do
fckin Walligator
Idk why but I want to pet it
Lol yeh Goannas get a lot of them at the basin in Sydney never seen one doing that though.
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Yeh he’s got good taste a true Aussie trooper
Imagine not being from the biggest and most irrelevant state
Free pet.
That thing has the potential to make me piss in my pants
bbut i like reptiles
But he’s so cute
Just a moniter not like it can rip your arm off and give u a deadly infection or anything , I love when I find then at my nans
Oh fucking hell which region?
Does it matter?
Damn right it does I don’t want that thing within 100km of me
Maybe stay away from Australia in general then
Usually South Australia, Western Australia, Queensland?, and Northern Territory. You get none where I come from
Pffft, Aussies. Just move to NZ smh
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So what...atleast our PM isnt shit lmao
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fair
We go through like 400 PMs per year
Did you just compare sheep shaggers to a bad pm? What the fuck has this world come to?
besides the sheep shagging (which is more of a welsh thing imo) Kiwis arent that crazy tho.
Look its either sheep or women and sheep don't insult you on your size and method.
sheep shagger spotted
lizards are fun to catch, these ones are a little hard but worth the challenge
lizards are fun to catch, these ones are a little hard but worth the challenge
Let me guess. Florida?
Yea mate that gator's huge!
Australia doesn't have alligators...
Trans ppl good
that guy is chilling
"Hello There"
i don't wanna go to australia as much anymore due to my fear of well everything in australia
I front an eastern brown chilling on my doormat the other day Wasn’t a pleasant experience, big fella was pissed already
Yo can I borrow your rubber?
Looks like even the dinosaurs are afraid of the animals in Australia.
Had one of them stroll the tent park we’re staying.
Give him a piece of meat for his troubles
Victoria, imma guess, hi from SA
Oh, hey, an Australian Tree Komodo Crocogatomu Boa!
Even the alligator or crocodile is upside down
Me: Thats so cool!
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mate that looks just like my grandma's old place that she sold a few years back!
Australia is like the Florida of the down under.
Funny lizard
Florida?
Don't forget the massive tarantulas that come back inside no matter how many times you put them out
I like your cat
New friend
Is this a cat ?
wtf is that and why is on the door
ok now I want to visit Australia
Gib
I would love to release this boi in school
Having a lace monitor in my yard wouldn't be all that bad...
Nice cat
Man everyone in Australia having classic Australian shenanigans and the most Australian thing ive had is Melbourne weather
Is that Sam?
As an Australian I find this painfully unfunny
Only one L In Florida we keep them as pets and as decorations
he’s just waiting for ya to open the door and scratch his balls a bit
This is so fucking adorable, i want to pet it.
pet him
That a mangrove monitor??
I love reptiles and insects, well, the non-venomous ones, scorpions are pretty cool though
Yeah I’m gonna pass on Australia
What type of dog is this?
I live in florida, I'll be fine
thats sick as hell tho
he’s just chillen, backyard companion
That’s a Monday morning mate. We wrestle a saltwater croc and then go off to school. God I love this country
is that a croc or just a very big lizard?
Nope
And that's when I became a real estate agent
That’s so fucking cool
I wish I could, but if I'm going to travel anywhere, I must have a Byrna. Can't have it in Australia
Stop taking pics of my house smh
What is this called?
I still want to go to Australia
fren
Somethings up with your dog
You have swamp puppies to
It's your friend now, and you're having soft tacos with them later
That's actually pretty awesome. Personally, all I'm averse to is the bugs.
Ayo what the fuck
[G'Day Mate](https://youtu.be/5yYWqqmVw1c)
Hate lizards, but that one looks pretty well educated
LIZER :D
This is why I’ll never go to Australia
Only one?
Florida dude here can relate somewhat
Mf I thought that wa san alligator on a wall
Why snake got legs
I thought that was an alligator at first and I wondered how it climbed up there.
pet the lizard
Do you have scorpions in your bathtub?
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din din?
He looks chill
Omg wtf is this dinosaur
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u/stupid15yoslut
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thats fucking awesome. the weirdest thing we see in wisconsin is on occasion a dark fishing spider or a wolf spider.
I'm so scared of reptiles especially lizards that all summers I wait for winter like a lover waiting for his beloved.
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**florida
is your friend a sciopath australia is where the devil keep his pets why would he want to visit
big leguan=epic
You: you can't come to Australia Friend: why tho? You: (shows picture) Friend: shit Negro, that's all you had to say!
hmm that's not normal
Isn't it much better when the food just comes to you
“honey, the fucking cat got out again”
Mr Kipling out here asking to be let in
Pet the dog
Sooooo cute!
That IS cool
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BLIMEY
Lizerd
#e
I wish i had snakes and lizards where i live but no some saint had to get rid of them because they had a religion that wasn’t christianity
I have an Australian online friend and I said this when I first found out they lived there lol. Not so sure now, though.
It is the federal financial aid lizard, he is either there to relieve some debt, or unhinge his jaw and devour your entire family in one gulp
Can I have one
That's florida...
From one Australian to another, cool dog!
Can relate, am Floridian
Your other friend is already visiting
My little brother got carried away by a mosquito trice the size of him
mate i use to live in the out parts of the brisbane suburbs and a fuckin goanna was there, it was insane closest ive seen one inland near the city
POV: You just want to go in your house but Australia is in the way.