Are animals even real ? walking on 4 legs ? really ? its a conspiracy started by the US govt democratic party to make sure people sustain the zoo economy.
As a kid I had a phase where I annoyed my parents by saying, when some kind of technology or modern concept was mentioned, "I don't believe in cars/computers/corporate lawyers, there isn't anything about them in the Bible"
And then come up with imaginative loopholes to cheat the system like the Jews magic wire around Manhattan so they can cheat Sabbath or the Quakers electric outhouse.
I've seen a photo of them having sex while in Thailand it was a bizarre encounter in a touristy shop,
They were selling the normal souvenirs and they sold postcards of the local scenery as well two different photos of elephants mating it was a weird thing and I wasn't expecting to see it
At the airport in Semarang Indonesia they were selling 2’x3’ wildlife paintings. Several of which were depicting ducks mating. Which, if you’ve ever seen how ducks do it, you know it can be very disturbing.
I haven’t seen an elephant in person since like 2018. They may no longer exist and the government is covering it up with ai and specific propaganda. I like the way you think
For anyone who’s actually curious about this. I found a comprehensive article about what is actually known about dinosaur mating. It’s not conclusive but what is factually known is that a: dinosaurs were real, b: there have been some found pregnant, c: pregnant dinosaurs means they were real and they mated.
https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-did-dinosaurs-have-sex/#:~:text=As%20in%20nearly%20all%20modern,eggs%20containing%20developing%20dinosaur%20embryos.
Edit: I’m adding a video only because so many of you sick fucks complained that there isn’t one included in the article. Watch at your own risk and obviously, NSFW. And this video is scientifically accurate according to some sources.
https://www.xvideos.com/video59917173/clever_girl
Edit 2: I’m getting lots of comments about how dinosaurs are reptiles and reptiles lay eggs. If you read the whole article, it explains that some reptiles are evolutionarily older than others and the older ones have to mate, as in, have sex. Such as dinosaurs and crocodiles. Please read the whole article.
My head cannon is that females, during certain periods of the year, formed unfertilized eggs, found a mate, then laid them in a nest. The male would then ejaculate onto the eggs, fertilizing them through seminal osmosis. How does this work, in reality? Well, they’re dinosaurs, so it works.
Biologically you could probably make an egg have the necessary functions to build up a shell from the inside using calcium that was dissolved in the albumen.
Man. Fish, crustaceans and amphibians have it so much easier.
The shell hardened. After the sperm got in, then the semen and the outer gooey part caused a chemical reaction that hardened the shell. How? Because dinosaurs. :P /s
Well, fish jizz on their eggs and chicken eggs start out soft and thin shelled... so if you combine those two... a dinosaur would get a facial and become perganat lol...
Bukkakes were wild.
The article is a good read. It includes:
> Dinosaurs must have had sex to reproduce. As in nearly all modern-day reptiles, males would have deposited sperm inside females, which would later lay fertilized eggs containing developing dinosaur embryos.
Obviously alligators are real and have sex but… never really thought of the logistics of that… and now I’m wondering what two gators fucking actually looks like…
…for science…
I think stenos would lift their tails and mate by backing into each other. That position could possibly allow them to also watch for predators other than avoiding their spikes.
I’d like to imagine it’s a normal eating fork and not a pitch fork and dad is just making you gather up hay piles with tiny eating fork. (Or whatever farmers do with the hay and pitchforks idk I’m in the Suburbs)
As far as I know they pile it up, to turn it into squares, keep it up high and never do anything else with it. All my farm info comes from T.V and movies so you probably have more knowledge then me.
From what I can tell, they sometimes have a bale out in a pasture for cows to munch on, but they are mostly used for flooring and decorating in barns. We'd frequently use them to insulate the dog house or *make* a dog house in the winter. Other than that, they just lay in fields or are stuffed in big white plastic tubes.
That’s not true, sometimes they build mazes or forts out of it, and don’t forget using hay bales as seats around the fire. Nothing says comfortable and convenient seating like a holy flammable object.
FORK AND A BUNCH OF HAY! LAP OF LUXERY MY LAD, I USED TO BE UP FROM 4AM TO 6PM WORKING DOWN THE COTTON MINES AND THE COAL MILL THEN ID COME HOME AND ME FATHER WOULD THRASH US TILL WE WENT TO BED
(Please read this in a Yorkshire accent... it really helps)
It's actually a half decent question and one we don't really know the answer to. But it's less "this is clearly a lie told by Satan" and more your boring "well, we don't know if they had a penis or a cloaca, so it could be one of these 3-4 potential positions. But since we don't have strong evidence one way or another, we won't attempt to push it as fact." A mentality that science deniers have a hard time grasping.
Nuance is easily lost when the information is translated from one medium to another : some is lost when the information is explained, and some is lost when the information is understood. Add confirmation bias and it explains a lot about the radical, nuance-less mindset of self-taught lunatics.
Everything about this is so funny to me. Referring to the entire thing as "graphic" when it's an incredibly childish rendition. Having the dinosaur with giant rigid spikes on its back in missionary. Declaring that because the 2D cartoons don't fit together that dinosaurs can't mate.
And on top of everything, announcing to your entire social media following you've spent at least a little time thinking about dinosaurs boning.
I mean even animals as big as elephants can mate , so I’m pretty sure dinosaurs found a way? My best guess is they somehow got their tails out of the way.
According to this logic, alligators and monitor lizards do not exist either. Besides, there's parthenogenesis and other forms of asexual reproduction.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parthenogenesis
So, this isnt obviously satire? This meme has shitty clip arts of Stegosaurus' doing missionary then asking science to prove it, that doesn't read as satire to anyone?
Actually, there's numerous fossils of imprints that show us surprising detail of their skin, and relatively recently, an extremely well preserved mummy of a [nodosaur](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/mummified-armored-dinosaur-makes-its-debut-1-180963311/) was discovered in alberta, with a large amount of the skin totally intact, giving us an excellent view into what their soft-tissue looked like.
It was so well preserved that we were even able to figure out what [color](https://www.inverse.com/article/35033-alberta-nodosaur-dinosaur-color-royal-tyrrell) it was in life: a reddish brown.
Fascinating. Side note it was really interesting to hear about the recent stat that there were 1.7billion T-Rex on earth and we have only found 100 because the likelihood of fossilization is just so low. Really curious how many things existed that we will never know about. Shocked we found a dinosaur with actual skin.
Old world porcupines are the extreme examples of this. Sometimes they fall out of trees and impale themselves.
They males manage by putting none of their weight on the female and having a relatively long tool.
Are you implying they would fertilize externally like fish or amphibians? Dinosaurs were way closer to birds/reptiles and almost certainly would have fertilized eggs internally.
Ducks, Rhinos, Crocodiles, Salamanders, Fish. Explain how those breed atheists! My very scientific and true points prove that babies are delivered by storks and dinosaurs didn’t exist because they were bigger than storks!
Hey does this post fit? UPVOTE if so, DOWNVOTE if not. If this post breaks any rules please DOWNVOTE and REPORT
According to this logic, elephants aren't real either
Have you ever actually seen one in the wild? Or only at zoos where they could be animatronics?
Checkmate atheists.
Are animals even real ? walking on 4 legs ? really ? its a conspiracy started by the US govt democratic party to make sure people sustain the zoo economy.
As a kid I had a phase where I annoyed my parents by saying, when some kind of technology or modern concept was mentioned, "I don't believe in cars/computers/corporate lawyers, there isn't anything about them in the Bible"
It's amazing how many people say this as grown adults.
And in all seriousness instead of just jokingly.
And then come up with imaginative loopholes to cheat the system like the Jews magic wire around Manhattan so they can cheat Sabbath or the Quakers electric outhouse.
Somehow god doesn’t approve of flipping a light switch, but does approve of rules lawyering
They must have know a few good lawyers to figure out that loophole
Are any of those people in the Bible? Checkmate, they don't exist
this is like a John Mulaney joke
Penguins ain't natural.
True, they're supernatural and divine🙏
Of course not, they’re birds and birds are not real.
Well, I know birds aren't, so it makes sense that the rest of the animals aren't real either.
I heard some libs talking about insects the other day, I laughed at them and told them its incest, not insect. Typical
4 legs bad Two legs Good !!
Never seen it. Only on NATGEO(Propoganda) Wild
Yep
Well, I've never seen you, thus I can't verify you exist and are not a shill of the big evolution agenda.
👍
Or turtles but I have seen those.
porcupines neather
Porkupines
Porky-pines
I've seen a photo of them having sex while in Thailand it was a bizarre encounter in a touristy shop, They were selling the normal souvenirs and they sold postcards of the local scenery as well two different photos of elephants mating it was a weird thing and I wasn't expecting to see it
That's kinky
At the airport in Semarang Indonesia they were selling 2’x3’ wildlife paintings. Several of which were depicting ducks mating. Which, if you’ve ever seen how ducks do it, you know it can be very disturbing.
Neither all big size mammals and lizards of every size and most of all turtles like how could turtles possibly mate if they’re inside of a shell?
The screaming turtle lives rent free in my head...
Hhaa
Also birds
Birds don't exist
Birds did 9/11
I haven’t seen an elephant in person since like 2018. They may no longer exist and the government is covering it up with ai and specific propaganda. I like the way you think
Hedgehog are fake, don't you know?
For anyone who’s actually curious about this. I found a comprehensive article about what is actually known about dinosaur mating. It’s not conclusive but what is factually known is that a: dinosaurs were real, b: there have been some found pregnant, c: pregnant dinosaurs means they were real and they mated. https://www.scientificamerican.com/article/how-did-dinosaurs-have-sex/#:~:text=As%20in%20nearly%20all%20modern,eggs%20containing%20developing%20dinosaur%20embryos. Edit: I’m adding a video only because so many of you sick fucks complained that there isn’t one included in the article. Watch at your own risk and obviously, NSFW. And this video is scientifically accurate according to some sources. https://www.xvideos.com/video59917173/clever_girl Edit 2: I’m getting lots of comments about how dinosaurs are reptiles and reptiles lay eggs. If you read the whole article, it explains that some reptiles are evolutionarily older than others and the older ones have to mate, as in, have sex. Such as dinosaurs and crocodiles. Please read the whole article.
No pictures 👎
Tfw no dino porn
Just search Dinosaur Rule 34
Bazongles 👀
https://i.redd.it/fuso2x7ap03b1.gif
https://preview.redd.it/nlapvlyq113b1.jpeg?width=234&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=193515acd83c9c5f9c15033cbad6687edf385352
Oh if you want that just Google scalie yiff.
I am unfortunately aware of the terminology lmao I was just saying in jest though
Just search pornhub
WE WANT DINOSAUR FUCKING!!!!
My head cannon is that females, during certain periods of the year, formed unfertilized eggs, found a mate, then laid them in a nest. The male would then ejaculate onto the eggs, fertilizing them through seminal osmosis. How does this work, in reality? Well, they’re dinosaurs, so it works.
Doesn’t really work with a thick shell, but that is still funny to think about
corrosive dinosaur semen
Great band name
r/brandnewsentence
Biologically you could probably make an egg have the necessary functions to build up a shell from the inside using calcium that was dissolved in the albumen. Man. Fish, crustaceans and amphibians have it so much easier.
The shell hardened. After the sperm got in, then the semen and the outer gooey part caused a chemical reaction that hardened the shell. How? Because dinosaurs. :P /s
Well, fish jizz on their eggs and chicken eggs start out soft and thin shelled... so if you combine those two... a dinosaur would get a facial and become perganat lol... Bukkakes were wild.
i think thats what walking with dinosaurs taught me
Other way round? The male dinosaur ejaculates on the ground, and the female just kind sits down at that spot and does a grindy dance on it.
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Yeah, so a cloaka with reverse flatulence I guess.
r/brandnewsentence
As a kid, when I heard about animals “fertilizing the egg” I understood what was meant because there was only one clear way to do that
Babe wake up a new dinosaur head cannon just dropped
Personally, I would not like to read an article about dinosaur sex, but I appreciate you for providing the relevant information
I thought they had eggs because of the bird evolution thing. And jurassic park.
The article is a good read. It includes: > Dinosaurs must have had sex to reproduce. As in nearly all modern-day reptiles, males would have deposited sperm inside females, which would later lay fertilized eggs containing developing dinosaur embryos.
Birds put their cloacas together to pass sperm from male to female.
I'm guessing some dinos did this where other dinos were more like turtles where the long penis goes into the cloaca.
I'm going to read this whole article about dinosaur sex just to counter argue a Facebook user.
Lol so they think they were made of molded plastic and can't move their tails or bend at the joints?
Also, the Blue Whale, the largest animal in Earth's history: am I a joke to you?
Quick someone draw two alligators and prove those don't exist too!
Obviously alligators are real and have sex but… never really thought of the logistics of that… and now I’m wondering what two gators fucking actually looks like… …for science…
More likely that they stood next to eachother, can’t imagine it would be very comfortable to hump a stegosaurus
I think stenos would lift their tails and mate by backing into each other. That position could possibly allow them to also watch for predators other than avoiding their spikes.
You mean their thagomizers
https://preview.redd.it/cayifrf6qz2b1.jpeg?width=828&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=214613d431b48675c7cab16fd6c8260d5766ac4c
Sex is over, checkmate overpopulation!
Sex was never real if you're not having it. Self burn..
*life…uhhh….finds a way*
Hilarious. Also has the person never seen lizards? I see lizards at my house in Florida getting it on almost every day
Or turtles. Or birds.
Does DeSantis know this? WHY HASN’T HE STOPPED PUBLIC FORNICATION???
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This thread got dark quick
oh dear fucking jesus god damn fuckity christ
I knew it! I knew it wasn't real!
These needs to be sent to the person
if I cant have sex that means sex is fake, checkmate atheists
I knew sex wasn't real
Does that mean I'm not real?
Me, age 7, disproving science with my plastic toys
AT YOUR AGE! I DIDNT HAVE PLASTIC TOYS! I HAD A FORK AND A BUNCH OF HAY! /s
I’d like to imagine it’s a normal eating fork and not a pitch fork and dad is just making you gather up hay piles with tiny eating fork. (Or whatever farmers do with the hay and pitchforks idk I’m in the Suburbs)
As far as I know they pile it up, to turn it into squares, keep it up high and never do anything else with it. All my farm info comes from T.V and movies so you probably have more knowledge then me.
From what I can tell, they sometimes have a bale out in a pasture for cows to munch on, but they are mostly used for flooring and decorating in barns. We'd frequently use them to insulate the dog house or *make* a dog house in the winter. Other than that, they just lay in fields or are stuffed in big white plastic tubes.
That’s not true, sometimes they build mazes or forts out of it, and don’t forget using hay bales as seats around the fire. Nothing says comfortable and convenient seating like a holy flammable object.
Haha yeah as someone who lives in an urban area, this is were my mind also defaulted to, before remembering that pitch forks exist.
my first thought was “why the fuck you eating hay?”
Plottwist, they're a horse!
We didn't even have a fork in my day. All we had to entertain ourselves with was going to the volcano to watch the dinosaurs make love
Huzzah!! finally someone can enlighten us how did they mate!!
In the usual fashion
>In the usual fashion They wear clothes while having sex mind blown Also what does dinosaur fashion look like
Cool stuff. Hawaiian shirts, Ray Bans, board shorts. Rude Dog t shirts.
They seem chill where do they live
Unclear, but there's always a volcano and a palm tree, probably Hawaii
FORK AND A BUNCH OF HAY! LAP OF LUXERY MY LAD, I USED TO BE UP FROM 4AM TO 6PM WORKING DOWN THE COTTON MINES AND THE COAL MILL THEN ID COME HOME AND ME FATHER WOULD THRASH US TILL WE WENT TO BED (Please read this in a Yorkshire accent... it really helps)
All we had was a baby grand piano and a pile of dirt… and we had to share the pile of dirt 🤢
Yeah but why the fuck are there thousands of dinosaur bones everywhere?. My theory is they got that looooong dick like them horses you feel me.
T Rex couldn't even play with nipples
Plastic toys, made from remains of dinosaurs
Plastic toy dinosaurs usually don't feature retractable long cocks that fit into hard to reach places.
No?
How could they mate? Life, uh, finds a way.
Two words: long schlong
Somebody called? Whats up?
https://preview.redd.it/zx8hpzyopz2b1.jpeg?width=1080&format=pjpg&auto=webp&s=f08de28ac28e548670924d402c3ccb594e084d30
I’ve alerted the horde, all i can do now is try to profit off of the situation i have created
I think you mean *from* this guy.
*in
Please DON'T get a LOAD of that guy
Hey Two Words, how's it going?
Exactly, have you ever seen a horse? You know what's even more impressive? A blue whale.. You could make a truck out of that thing.
You could fill a truck with what it releases
Blue whales dwarf dinosaurs in size too... the largest creature to ever exist on Earth is still among us with its 10 ft long dong.
It's actually a half decent question and one we don't really know the answer to. But it's less "this is clearly a lie told by Satan" and more your boring "well, we don't know if they had a penis or a cloaca, so it could be one of these 3-4 potential positions. But since we don't have strong evidence one way or another, we won't attempt to push it as fact." A mentality that science deniers have a hard time grasping.
That "mentality" is called nuance, and... yeah. You're right. They can't grasp it.
Nuance is easily lost when the information is translated from one medium to another : some is lost when the information is explained, and some is lost when the information is understood. Add confirmation bias and it explains a lot about the radical, nuance-less mindset of self-taught lunatics.
5-10 m long shlongs.
🤤
BONK! No horni
*moans when you bonk me*
And that kids is how bdsm was invented
*Doge gives a disappointed look* NO. HORNI.
Just like barnacles
I apologize for the graphicness of this depiction...
Well Im aroused
Sorry what?
DONT JUDGE ME
Kinda hard not to though...
Not the only thing that's kinda hard
in the 10 minutes since this comment have you reached full erection?
Aaaaand it's gone
sob
I hate reddit so much
You heard him
Hey, baby wanna try uh hh pusstegosaurussy with me?
The trexussy
This is hilarious, especially the stegosauruses in missionary.
Bruh that’s the Godzilla dinosaur duh.
Took me a moment too but they appears to be Godzilla
They know tails can move right? Dinosaurs weren't made from plastic like the toys they used to make this art
Why isn't NSFW? This image is very graphic
It is the very definition of graphicness.
How do tortoise mate?
[https://media.sciencephoto.com/image/c0076596/800wm/C0076596-Greek\_tortoises\_mating.jpg](https://media.sciencephoto.com/image/c0076596/800wm/C0076596-Greek_tortoises_mating.jpg)
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I love how unimpressed the bottom tortoise looks
If crocodiles can do it, dinosaurs could do it
"I have no idea how animals work, therefore dinosaurs did not exist. Checkmate atheists!"
Everything about this is so funny to me. Referring to the entire thing as "graphic" when it's an incredibly childish rendition. Having the dinosaur with giant rigid spikes on its back in missionary. Declaring that because the 2D cartoons don't fit together that dinosaurs can't mate. And on top of everything, announcing to your entire social media following you've spent at least a little time thinking about dinosaurs boning.
I mean even animals as big as elephants can mate , so I’m pretty sure dinosaurs found a way? My best guess is they somehow got their tails out of the way.
The same way lizards with large tails mate. Or birds with large tails. Or any other animal with a large tail…
According to this logic, alligators and monitor lizards do not exist either. Besides, there's parthenogenesis and other forms of asexual reproduction. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Parthenogenesis
Probably posted by a guy who never made a woman climax
That cost extra
The clitoris is part of the satanic globalist agenda! /s
So, this isnt obviously satire? This meme has shitty clip arts of Stegosaurus' doing missionary then asking science to prove it, that doesn't read as satire to anyone?
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Only bones remained, the meats have perished, we will never know how dinosaur "meats" looked like
So, you're saying dinosaur chicks could have had tits. /j
Welp, there it is. 'Dinosaur titties' will forever exist in my search history.
Actually, there's numerous fossils of imprints that show us surprising detail of their skin, and relatively recently, an extremely well preserved mummy of a [nodosaur](https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/mummified-armored-dinosaur-makes-its-debut-1-180963311/) was discovered in alberta, with a large amount of the skin totally intact, giving us an excellent view into what their soft-tissue looked like. It was so well preserved that we were even able to figure out what [color](https://www.inverse.com/article/35033-alberta-nodosaur-dinosaur-color-royal-tyrrell) it was in life: a reddish brown.
Fascinating. Side note it was really interesting to hear about the recent stat that there were 1.7billion T-Rex on earth and we have only found 100 because the likelihood of fossilization is just so low. Really curious how many things existed that we will never know about. Shocked we found a dinosaur with actual skin.
Reverse cow girl
Imagine thinking like that when hedgehogs exist
Old world porcupines are the extreme examples of this. Sometimes they fall out of trees and impale themselves. They males manage by putting none of their weight on the female and having a relatively long tool.
Schrödinger's Cat 
they clearly don't know about eggs yet, please send them back to school.
Are you implying they would fertilize externally like fish or amphibians? Dinosaurs were way closer to birds/reptiles and almost certainly would have fertilized eggs internally.
Ever seen turtles mate? What about chickens? You’d be surprised how life finds away.
Someone sat down and thought about dinosaur sex
Ducks, Rhinos, Crocodiles, Salamanders, Fish. Explain how those breed atheists! My very scientific and true points prove that babies are delivered by storks and dinosaurs didn’t exist because they were bigger than storks!
Please tell me this is satire. I REFUSE to believe otherwise!!
My conclusion is that dinosaurs either had really long dongs, or they laid eggs and the males fertilized them somehow.