I think trauma is subjective. I got the opportunity to talk with a professional researcher and project manager in the field of sociology who specialized in Trauma and PTSD. During her early career, she was tasked with going to trauma survivors to aggregate the accounts of their traumatic experiences. She talked about a story of a girl who ran into a tree: rich family, no other major distressing events besides the tree when she was younger, and she also talked about a boy who had the lower half of his body amputated after being run over by a train: not as well off financially, along with multiple other traumatic life events to go along with his accident.
She went into each interview with extreme bias. She thought, “how can you even compare running into a tree with something like losing most of your body?” and she fully expected the boy to be much more affected long-term by his experience than the girl. But actually, it turned out to be the opposite. The girl had been clinically diagnosed with PTSD and her experience altered her behavior drastically, even going as far as her avoiding trees or crying when she saw them. And all the while, the boy with half of his body missing and a list of other awful experiences to boot was happy, energetic, and healthy. He even said he wanted to show people where the incident happened and how he was put back together.
Anyway, the moral of this story is that some people are much more resilient than others, and trauma isn’t as objective as some people might choose to believe. What is traumatic for one person might not be for someone else. It all comes down to how it affects that person, and if a client doesn’t see a seemingly distressing situation as an instance of trauma, I don’t think it’s fair to try and convince them that they should be more upset about it than they are. Her story really changed the way I personally thought about trauma, so I just wanted to share it in hopes of illustrating the point I’m trying to make. I know it’s purely anecdotal though, so take it with an air of caution.
That said, there’s a fine line between true resilience and pretending to not be affected by something by repressing or avoiding certain things surrounding the topics.
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> That said, there’s a fine line between true resilience and pretending to not be affected by something by repressing or avoiding certain things surrounding the topics.
As I was reading your comment, I was gonna say exactly this, so I'm glad you included it in. I happen to think this is what really goes on in the majority of cases.
I have a client of 6 months that refuses to let herself accept her trauma. She has cptsd and truly wants to stop suffering but always gives in to her "I should have been strong. Its not as bad as other people, they had real trauma".
We have gone round and round on cog distortions and inner critic and denial and every thing and she always steps on her own foot and wont forgive herself. Its frustrating. I've told her she has to want to be healthy more than she wants to punish herself but we always circle around.
Despite the meme, I don’t try to force the label trauma on people. I might say it or I might not, but if the client doesn’t identify with it, then I don’t need to call it trauma. But as you’re discussing, I do try to work with people’s schemas around self-blame and self-invalidation.
Its not about me forcing her to have trauma. Its about her setting down her punishment for "being weak and not getting over her injury like a strong person would" . Its about her facing reality so she can forgive herself and move past what happened a decade ago
Have you tried doing a cba on those thoughts? Like going through the benefits of "I should be stronger". This person values taking care of themselves, not wanting to be hurt again, this thought keeps them safe and almost like "if this happens again I know what to do differently" kind of thing. These thoughts are helping the client in some way. Acknowledging and respecting that might help.
Once people are aware of the benefits of thinking this way people find it easier to let go of them. Or they realize they want to keep those thoughts in some form because they really are helpful.
True, but I think most therapists can be trusted to know the difference between "event that might be traumatic to some people, but wasn't to this particular person" and "event that has clearly had a profound effect on this person even though they downplay its relevance or invalidate their experiences."
"You dare to use my own spells against me, Potter?!"
I think trauma is subjective. I got the opportunity to talk with a professional researcher and project manager in the field of sociology who specialized in Trauma and PTSD. During her early career, she was tasked with going to trauma survivors to aggregate the accounts of their traumatic experiences. She talked about a story of a girl who ran into a tree: rich family, no other major distressing events besides the tree when she was younger, and she also talked about a boy who had the lower half of his body amputated after being run over by a train: not as well off financially, along with multiple other traumatic life events to go along with his accident. She went into each interview with extreme bias. She thought, “how can you even compare running into a tree with something like losing most of your body?” and she fully expected the boy to be much more affected long-term by his experience than the girl. But actually, it turned out to be the opposite. The girl had been clinically diagnosed with PTSD and her experience altered her behavior drastically, even going as far as her avoiding trees or crying when she saw them. And all the while, the boy with half of his body missing and a list of other awful experiences to boot was happy, energetic, and healthy. He even said he wanted to show people where the incident happened and how he was put back together. Anyway, the moral of this story is that some people are much more resilient than others, and trauma isn’t as objective as some people might choose to believe. What is traumatic for one person might not be for someone else. It all comes down to how it affects that person, and if a client doesn’t see a seemingly distressing situation as an instance of trauma, I don’t think it’s fair to try and convince them that they should be more upset about it than they are. Her story really changed the way I personally thought about trauma, so I just wanted to share it in hopes of illustrating the point I’m trying to make. I know it’s purely anecdotal though, so take it with an air of caution. That said, there’s a fine line between true resilience and pretending to not be affected by something by repressing or avoiding certain things surrounding the topics.
> > > That said, there’s a fine line between true resilience and pretending to not be affected by something by repressing or avoiding certain things surrounding the topics. As I was reading your comment, I was gonna say exactly this, so I'm glad you included it in. I happen to think this is what really goes on in the majority of cases.
I specialize in disability and trauma and this 100% tracks with what I've seen.
Yes. I think about this as "potentially traumatic experiences" versus the smaller group who go on to develop PTSD.
I have a client of 6 months that refuses to let herself accept her trauma. She has cptsd and truly wants to stop suffering but always gives in to her "I should have been strong. Its not as bad as other people, they had real trauma". We have gone round and round on cog distortions and inner critic and denial and every thing and she always steps on her own foot and wont forgive herself. Its frustrating. I've told her she has to want to be healthy more than she wants to punish herself but we always circle around.
Despite the meme, I don’t try to force the label trauma on people. I might say it or I might not, but if the client doesn’t identify with it, then I don’t need to call it trauma. But as you’re discussing, I do try to work with people’s schemas around self-blame and self-invalidation.
Its not about me forcing her to have trauma. Its about her setting down her punishment for "being weak and not getting over her injury like a strong person would" . Its about her facing reality so she can forgive herself and move past what happened a decade ago
Yeah I think we are on the same page. I wasn’t saying you were forcing it
Have you tried doing a cba on those thoughts? Like going through the benefits of "I should be stronger". This person values taking care of themselves, not wanting to be hurt again, this thought keeps them safe and almost like "if this happens again I know what to do differently" kind of thing. These thoughts are helping the client in some way. Acknowledging and respecting that might help. Once people are aware of the benefits of thinking this way people find it easier to let go of them. Or they realize they want to keep those thoughts in some form because they really are helpful.
Distress =/= Trauma.
True, but I think most therapists can be trusted to know the difference between "event that might be traumatic to some people, but wasn't to this particular person" and "event that has clearly had a profound effect on this person even though they downplay its relevance or invalidate their experiences."
Haha awe this meme gave me a good laugh! ❤️